Lonely Lance

Yeah, ok, so I lied. SORRY! I just had a really bad day yesterday. My dad told me that he would be proud of me as long as I am "not pregnant, a fag, or in jail." So I was just a bit frustrated. I am perky now though! So anyway, I haven't written anyone back, I am sorry. I will try and answer all of them here... I am really good right now. Thanks for all the concern. I have just had a really emotional year so far. A lot of crap has happened. I am starting only now to actually just get back to normal. I have had to do a lot of thinking and right now, I am actually happy...I haven't been in a really long time.

Thank You to everyone who wrote me! I really appreciate the care and concern! You are the ones who are really responsible for the continuation of this story! Give yourselves a pat on the back! So this is all for you. I hope you enjoy.

LEGAL: Ok you all know the drill...If it is illegal for you to read this, then don't. Any similarity to real people is just coincidence. This is a work of fiction... If you are still reading this, which I am sure you are, enjoy!

Ok, so here we go! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lonely Lance...Chapter 12

Lance was awoken abruptly at noon by his cell phone ringing in his pocket. He pulled his arm our from behind Steve and squirmed out of Steve's arms without waking him up. He looked at the screen on his cell phone and it said JC's number. Lance walked into the bathroom and closed the door halfway. He turned on the light and pressed send on his phone and put it to his ear.

• "Hey Josh."

• "Hey Lance, how are you?"

• "I am pretty good, how are you?"

• "I can't complain, how are things up there with Steve?"

• "He's still asleep. Everything went good getting in. We had to stop at his parents house before we came to the hotel. I think we got to sleep at like two. I was afraid that I was gonna wake him up answering the phone."

• "Why would you wake him up? Don't you have two rooms?"

• "No I don't, look Josh, I didn't want to do this over the phone, but I guess I should tell you now. Alright, are you ready?"

• "I guess, but I think I already know what you are going to say."

• "Oh really" Lance said a little annoyed.

• "Yup, just don't get pregnant." JC said laughing a little. There was a pause for a minute.

• "How the he... So you know then I am guessing?"

• "Yup, I was just waiting for you to tell me." JC Said

• "But how?"

• "Instinct I guess. Surprised?"

• "Uhm yeah, a little. Am I like flamboyant or something?"

• "Nope, not at all, you are just like the rest of us. Can I ask ya somethin?"

• "Sure, go for it." (If any of you live near Detroit and get chan 4 wdiv their theme is "go for it")

• "Well Lanceepoo, Did you sleep with him?"

• "What?"

• "You heard me."

• "Well yeah..."

• "HA! I knew it! I am such a genius... is he any good in bed?" JC said laughing

• "I wouldn't know, we were both really emotional last night. We held each other. That is all. It felt so good Josh, you don't even understand how good it felt to hold him and to have him hold me, it is so indescribable!"

• "So are you guys like a couple?"

• "No, I don't think so. We are just friends. I don't know!"

• "Do you want to be more than friends?"

• "I don't know."

• "Yes you do. Everyone always knows, either they don't know how to word it or they don't want to say it."

• "Ok, fine Josh, you are right, as you always are. I would love to have a relationship with him."

• "Do you love him?"

• "What the hell, is this twenty questions?" Lance asked a little pissed

• "Why don't you just answer the question?"

• "Because I don't know!"

• "Yes you do, quit saying that."

• "Ok so I do, but it is too soon, I just don't know. I don't know how he feels either which just makes it so much harder. He is so perfect for me Josh. He is just, I dunno but I just have this feeling about him."

• "Well I am happy for you. But..."

• "But what?"

• "Well right now you are vulnerable, very vulnerable. I don't want to see you getting hurt. You are like a brother and a best friend."

• "I know Josh."

• "Also, he isn't just some guy... He is our publicist who we have to live with until we are done with all this or if he makes a breach in contract which I doubt he will be doing."

• "Anything else mother?"

• "Yes, two things actually."

• "Grr! Ok, just say it."

• "Well for one, he is very vulnerable as well. He just lost his mother and things are very tough for him right now. He may just try and replace her. You never know."

• "Josh, it is nothing like that, trust me ok, it is nothing like that."

• "Ok, I will take your word for it."

• "Now what is the second problem?"

• "Well you do realize that you need to tell four guys that you see all the time that you are gay. You realize this I hope?"

• "Yeah, I have thought about it a little. It's gonna be tough to do it. It's gonna be even more tough to tell Steve."

• "To tell Steve what?"

• "To tell Steve that I think I, no wait, I am sure of this, to tell Steve that I love him."

"You what?" Steve said as Lance looked up from looking down at the tile floor as he sat on the toilet (seat down). Steve had heard what Lance had said. He woke up a few minutes before and walked in on Lance pouring his heart out to JC.

TBC..... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ok well it's so extremely short. I am sorry. I would like to say a bunch of things here. In the past twenty four hours I have received nearly fifty e-mails. I will respond to them all, I promise. My number one priority was to get this out to you all. I realized that what I did last night was stupid. I know nothing much happens in this chapter but I wanted to make sure you all know that I am gonna still write. Expect the next chapter out soon. In response to a couple of the e-mails I have read yes music and literature are an extremely big part of my life. I listen to music constantly and I love poetry. I also love quotes...I am always in the mood for a good quote! Thank you for all the care and concern and acceptance. It was nutty of me to do what I did but things have just been so confusing lately. I would like to thank three people right now. Without them this story would be sucky. First to Jilly, she's a girl reading a gay story, gotta love it. Second to Matt, thanks for the support it means a lot.

Josh, you get a new paragraph. Sorry guys. Ya know how much you mean to me Josh. Thank you for everything. You have helped me so much lately I do not know what the hell I would do without you. I will see ya there just in case. You were made like this for a reason, we all were right! It's not something we can control but we live with it and accept it and become happy. It is hard for everyone. I love ya babe.

Questions, Comments, Concerns, Complaints or anything else e-mail me spifty214@email.com, I`ll get back to ya eventually :)...Have a Great day.

~John