Boo for electrical surges that short out computers! Hooray for tax refund checks that buy new computers! Yes, that's right, some stupid writer was putting the finishing touches on chapter 13 of his story during a storm, and then ZAP! Nothing. But Lady Luck has been smiling, and the government has given him enough money to upgrade to a better system! Hooray!!! And who says the government never does anything nice for the little guy?
I also want to acknowledge the war many men and women are fighting in the Middle East. There are varying opinions as to why they are there, but I'm sure we all are praying for their quick and safe return. These are not just soldiers doing their jobs, but someone's father, mother, brother, sister, son, or daughter. We should also keep those who have lost loved ones in our thoughts.
Many writers like to make the thirteenth chapter of their stories full of bad luck, but I'm resisting the temptation. Besides, 13 is my lucky number, so maybe it will be Burke's as well!
As always, I do not personally know NSYNC, anyone affiliated with them, or any other celebrities that may appear within these pages. I have no clue about their true sexual orientations/habits or personalities. This is a complete work of fiction spawned by my often warped mind. If you are offended by a story featuring relationships between men, or are not old enough to read such things, please go elsewhere. Disney has a nice site! LOL
A Light in the Tunnel
Chapter 13
Though he didn't really expect them, Burke saw no fireworks and heard no music as Josh's lips caressed his own, the man's unshaved chin rubbing against his smooth face. Josh's thumb slowly stroked Burke's cheek, running lightly over the bone beneath his closed eye. Leaning closer, Burke's hand reached out, landing on the tight muscles of Josh lower back, kneading and petting the knots there. With a soft gasp, the boy's mouth opened, Josh's tongue snaking past his teeth.
A disappointed moan marking the end of the kiss, Burke's eyes drifted open, realization of where he was, who he was with, and what he was just doing slamming like a freight train into his cloudy mind. He quickly scanned the area, looking for someone who might be staring or snapping pictures of them. He almost wanted to pull away as Josh took his hand, lifted it upward, and politely kissed the back. Burke wasn't sure how to respond to such tenderness, and blushed, ashamed of his naivete. "What's the red for?" Josh whispered.
"I--I'm a little out of my element right now." The man's head tilted in a classic pose of confusion, the cords in his neck standing out. "I mean, that was my first kiss. Ever."
"How was it?"
"I'm not really sure. I don't have anything to compare it to." Burke's tongue darted over his bottom lip, still tasting Josh there. He wanted to ask something else, but didn't want to sound like a little kid.
As if reading Burke's mind, Josh answered the unspoken question. "You did perfect." They stared at each other in shy silence for a few moments. "C'mon, let's get out of here. I want to do something."
A city that thrived on and cherished the tourists, Josh easily found what he was looking for at a nearby strip mall. Burke tried to drag his feet, but found it hard to refuse his new boyfriend, relenting. They ducked into the instant photo booth, pulled the curtain shut, and posed for the camera after Josh fed the machine some money. As the warning light flashed for the third picture, Josh poked Burke's cheek. The boy turned to look at him, and was grabbed into another kiss, the shutter clicking. Their mouths were still pressed together for the next photo, then they broke apart. Once their session was over, they waited impatiently for the strip of black and white pictures to be spit out. Their heads bumped together, causing chuckles, as they examined the paper. Josh diplomatically tore it in half, handing Burke three of them and keeping the others for himself. "Now we will always have something to remember this night by."
"Chris will flip if sees a picture of us kissing in a public photo booth," Burke giggled, half contemplating showing his father.
Josh grinned, obviously proud about something. "Nope! I asked him about us becoming serious the other day, and he gave his permission. He won't care."
"Josh! You asked my dad if it was alright for us to be boyfriends? That's so crazy! I'm seventeen, after all."
"I know. I just didn't want to get you in trouble. I saved you the embarrassment of telling him yourself." Burke's heart melted at the thought of Josh trying to keep him at ease. "We better get going. Your curfew is getting close."
Coursing through the brightly lit Orlando streets, Burke's attention was not on traffic or the passing scenery, but on the man at his side. He found it hard not to stare at Josh, the way the yellow street lights turned his eyes an eerie shade of green, or the dark hallows formed beneath his high cheekbones. As the made their way back to his house, Burke reached across the gap between their seats, his fingers nestling among Josh's. They shared a quick smile as the jeep passed through the gate signaling their evening's end was near. Josh's arm wound around Burke's narrow waist as they ambled up the sidewalk, their bodies pressing close as if trying to keep warm. The porch light was already on, meaning that Chris wasn't going to interrupt them, or that he wasn't going to give them any warning. "Well," he sighed, "I guess this is it." Remembering something had read in the Bible years earlier, Burke wished God would stop the clock like he stopped the sun for Joshua.
Josh frowned. "Yeah. It's over too soon, isn't it?"
"I've had a great time, Josh. I always do." He saw a playful glint in the man's amazingly blue eyes. "What? I do have a great time when we're out."
"I'm glad. I do too. But I was just thinking about how tonight blows the rest away."
"Definitely," he smiled, his lips tingling at the thought of their first kiss and the ones that followed. "But now I have to call Justin in the morning."
"Why's that?"
"To gossip about you," Burke replied matter-of-factly. "He would torture me otherwise."
"Well then, we can't have that. There will be no torturing of my boyfriend." Burke's eyes misted for a moment or two, trying to wipe them away before Josh saw it. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry. Are you alright?"
"Yeah, Josh. Just happy."
There was a thoughtful look in the boy's eyes, and it intrigued him. "Tell me what you're thinking about, Burke." He shook his head. "Come on. I promise I won't make fun of you or anything."
"It's just that I used to imagine something like this, you and me, when I was feeling depressed and alone. There wasn't anyone I could turn to, no one that I felt safe with, so I used to think about having you to talk to and stand by, and I felt a little better about everything. Now, here you are, right in front of me, and it's like a dream come true or something. I know it's silly, but--"
The singer grabbed his friend, yanking him into a voracious hug. "It's not silly, Burke. I can't erase everything that's happened to you, I wish I could, but I promise, you'll never be alone again. You'll always have me and the rest of the guys. We're your family. You understand?" Burke nodded against his shoulder. "Good. Since we have to call it a night, I say we do it on a high note." A finger sliding beneath his chin, Josh tilted Burke's head up so that they were looking at each other, blue eyes locking onto gray. "Good night, Burke," he whispered just before their lips touched. Though it was much more chaste than the ones they had shared earlier, the kiss made Burke go weak in the knees, his arms wrapping around Josh's neck. Goosebumps shivered down his back as the man's fingers raked tenderly through his hair. Cold emptiness filled him as Josh stepped back. "Night, Burke. Talk to you later?"
"You better," he sighed as Josh sulked toward the jeep. "Good night, Josh." Burke stood on the front steps until the taillights faded from his sight, then went inside. He leaned against the door for a moment, relishing the sensations running through his body, his nose twitching at the light, lingering scent of Josh's now familiar cologne.
"It's five after eleven," Chris called from the living room. Smiling, Burke went to see his father. Chris was laying on one of the couches, sitting up when Burke walked through the doorway. "Your late."
"We were here on time, and you know it," he giggled. "I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if you were watching from the window."
"Of course I wasn't. Have a good time?"
Burke blushed, every event of the date emblazoned in his mind. "Of course."
"If the interesting shade of red your skin just turned is any indication, I would have to agree with you. What kind of souvenirs did you snag this time?"
Burke pulled the flattened popcorn box from his jacket pocket. "I knew I shouldn't have told you about that." He almost reached for the pictures, but thought better of it at the last second. "Dad, Josh said he had a talk with you the other day."
Chris patted the cushion next to him, Burke happily snuggling up to his father. "Yes, we did. He wanted to talk to me about how your relationship would progress while we were on tour. I know from experience what it's like, and I'm glad to see that he is thinking that far ahead. I want to talk to you about it too. Josh has probably said that there won't be a lot of opportunities for you all to go out and do things, but that's just part of it. You know how much we've seen of each other while recording, and it's almost that bad while on the road. There is bus time, but a lot of that is spent sleeping. I just want you to know what you are getting into if you decide to get serious."
Burke nodded, thinking about what it would be like. "It'll be rough compared to how it is here at home, but I really like Josh, dad. I want to give it a try, and I know he does too. Tonight he asked me if I would be his boyfriend."
"And what did you say?"
"I told him hell no," Burke replied sarcastically. "I mean, really. Doesn't anyone realize Justin and I have been sleeping together since I got here?"
Chris snickered and thumped Burke on the head. "Smart ass!"
"That's what you get for asking stupid questions. Of course I told him yes."
"I'm happy for you, son. Josh is a good man. It's been a long day. Why don't we call it a night?" Burke nodded, stood up, the bent to kiss Chris on the cheek, their normal bedtime ritual. Making a face, Chris swiped at his skin, rubbing his fingers together. "Have your lips been dry?"
"No, why?"
"Lip balm." Burke's face paled before burning hotly. "Ah! That explains why your lips were red when you came in! Have a seat." Expecting a lecture, Burke meekly sat back down. "First of all, take that scared look off your face. I told you it was alright. Secondly--how was it?"
"Good. Great. Amazing."
"Ok. We don't have to have a conversation about personal limits, do we?"
"We kissed, dad. We've been going on dates for the past month and we've just reached that point. I think it's going to be a while until anything else comes up."
"I was just making sure. Now, I know Josh pretty good, so I bet he did something so you will both remember tonight." Burke grabbed the half strip of pictures and passed them over. "These are really good. You two make a nice couple. I like this one the best." He expected Chris to be making a joke about the one with them kissing, but instead found him pointing to a different one. Josh was behind him, his toned arms around his stomach, and their heads side by side. Burke smiled, thinking it was just like the one that was taken on their first date, the one he had in a frame on his nightstand. "Bedtime, Burkey boy."
"Goodnight, dad. Love you."
A few days before they were due to leave, Burke was relaxing. His mind had been racing as he imagined all the things that would happen while on tour with the guys; all the places they would go, people he might meet. He had gone to the mall and bought a United States map, ready to track their progress through the country, little gold stars ready to mark each stop. As a joke about writing a travel book, Joey had bought him a special binder to rate each hotel and restaurant with. Burke was going through the whole process rather methodically, carefully planning which outfits he would pack, which books to take for the long drives between cities, or how many rolls of film to pack for his camera. Despite the many warnings he had received from his friends about life on the bus, Burke was excited about it, picturing an awesome two month road trip. His logical side burnt out and craving a break, Burke sat on the back porch, scribbling in a notebook. As usual when he was stressed, he hummed, a random tune coming out while he jotted down a poem. Quickly, as it had been doing over the past few days, his thoughts drifted to Josh and the feelings he had for him. He bumbled like an idiot every time he tried to say what he was thinking and feeling, but the words came effortlessly as he wrote. "Hey bro, was going on?" Shielding his eyes from the sun, Burke looked up. "Hey Jus. Just goofing around, writing some junk." "Can I see, or is it personal?" They were all careful to ask before butting into Burke space, wanting him to have as much privacy as they wanted for themselves. Burke handed him the notebook. Reading quickly, Justin smiled. "This would make a perfect song! Can I play around with it?" Burke rolled his eyes, wondering how many perfect songs his friend and brother could come up with in a week's time. The last "perfect" song had been inspired by a hot dog, so he didn't have high hopes for this one. "Go ahead." "Is this about JC?" Burke nodded. "I thought so. When you are writing about someone you care for, it has more emotions." "What's going on with you?" "Oh, I was packing some stuff for the tour, and needed something that I left over here. I was about to leave, but I saw you sitting out here and decided to bother for a minute." Justin tore the poem out, folded it, and stuffed the paper in his back pocket. "But I guess I should get home. Oh," the tall blond leaned over and pecked Burke on the forehead. "From mom. Talk to you later, Burke." "See ya later, Just," Burke said, waving from the front door as the little red Miata spun out of the driveway. Noticing the strangely low humidity, he went inside long enough to put some shoes on and take his cell phone off its charger. "Dad," he hollered, "I'm going for a walk. I have my phone with me." "Alright. Don't be gone long, and be careful," Chris yelled back from the office. The man had been spending long hours there, finalizing business things before they left for the tour. Burke slipped his sunglasses onto his face as he started down the sidewalk, strolling along with no real destination in mind. Nosy bids squawked in the trees overhead, adding sour notes to the tune he whistled. Passing by a house, Burke quickly stopped an errantly bouncing ball, not wanting the little girl that followed to run out in the street. She smiled sweetly as he gave it back and continued on his way. The sky was cloudless, almost the color of Josh's eyes when he laughed. Giggling softly, he stopped at another house, bending to smell a bush of deep red roses. "Hello there!" a little old lady said, popping up from behind the dense plant and startling the unsuspecting boy. "Hello. I was just admiring your roses." She gently fluffed a few blossoms. "They are really lovely this year." Pulling a pair of small scissors from the apron around her waist, she snipped off a bloom. "Here you are." "Thank you ma'am. They really are beautiful." Though he was positive it would look silly, he tucked the stem beneath his watch band. "Have a wonderful day." "You too, young man, you too." Burke left their heavily landscaped community, crossed the busy street, and went into a gas station, grabbing a bottle of water. He briefly considered getting a candy bar as well, but decided against it. Standing at the counter to pay, he heard the door's chime ring. He stiffened as something hard was pressed into the small of his back. "You're coming with me," a familiar, icy voice whispered in his ear. "If you're smart, you won't make a scene." "Yes, mother," he replied, trying to stay calm. He wasn't sure what she had in her hand, but he wasn't going to risk it being a gun. Water in hand, he was guided outside and into a rented station wagon. Beverly quickly climbed into the driver's seat. "What are you doing?" "I'm taking you home. Where you belong." As if were a small handbag, she calmly laid a pistol in her lap. "And you need a gun to do that?" She glared at him. "Watch your mouth, you stupid brat! You know better than to speak to me like that." Though he was afraid of what his mother might do, he was more afraid of never seeing the guys again, of being ripped away from the family he loved. "You're insane! You know that, don't you?" Faster than he could blink, Beverly's hand shot out, smacking him across the cheek. "Darn it, Burke! Look what you made me do! I told you to watch your mouth. Why can't you just be a good kid for once?" Wincing in pain, her ring slashing across his skin, Burke worked hard to keep from crying. "You've gotten some bad habits, but, don't worry, I'll break you of them pretty quick. I always do." "How did you know I would be out?" "I didn't. I've been waiting for you to go somewhere. Now, I've got you, and we're going home. Away from all this evil." Burke felt wetness oozing down his face, and stuck his tongue out to catch it. Instead of salty tears, it was the slightly metallic taste of blood. He pressed his fingers to the gash, groaning. "Stop your whining. You'll live. We have a flight to catch." "You can't get on a plane with that gun, and the minute you put it down, I'm taking off running," he spat. "Oh, I think you'll get on that plane. You know why? Because if you do anything stupid, I'm going to the press and telling them everything you've been doing for the past two months. How do you think everyone will react if they find out that music group has been hanging around trash like you? How many of them have you managed to confuse into bed, Burke? Don't forget, you're a dirty homosexual, Burke. No one really wants you around. I'm the only one who could ever put up with you for long, but that's only because I'm your mother." Burke sat dumbstruck, seeing no way out for him. His mother would use him against the guys. Their ruin would be all his fault. "You threw me away," he whimpered. "The devil tried to confuse me. Now I see that my purpose on this earth is to keep you from taking other people to hell with you. God is on my side." Driving down the highway, Christian music blaring on the radio and Beverly yelling, Burke cried. He was going back to the people and places that almost killed him. He would never see his friends again. Maybe it was better this way. If he weren't around, they wouldn't have to worry about reporters barging into their lives and discovering him. He soon found himself back in the company of the old darkness, all joy being sucked into the black void. For a brief moment in time, he had been something, or at least allowed himself to believe he was more than a waste of air. Now it was being ripped away. Sobbing against the window, he felt his phone vibrate against his thigh. There was no way he could answer it, not with his mother less than three feet away. Soon it stopped, and he silently mouthed goodbye to whoever it was. "I can't believe that I had any part in making such an ungrateful child. I spend all my time and money trying to raise you right, and all you can do is take advantage of that. And after that stupid game with suicide, you didn't even attempt to make things right. Oh no, you take off and sponge off of people who you've tricked into thinking you are worth something. Stupid, Burke, that's what you are." Beverly continued her rant, saying the same hurtful things Burke had heard all his life. In the middle of her statements on how she would force him into being a good person, he thought of a promise he had made. Joey, after a drama and tear filled talk, made him swear to listen to what he said instead of drawing his opinions from his mother. That thought, the sincere hopefulness and determination in the man's eyes and voice, slapped his ears shut to the insults flying like a plague of locusts from his mother's mouth. Joey was his big brother, always doling out bear hugs and smiles as if they were food to the hungry. Joey loved him, and thought he was good. Burke almost grinned at some of the pranks they had pulled together. He thought about Justin having to run to the bathroom after they had tickled him to the point of nearly peeing his pants. Knowing that everything Beverly said were lies spoken by a miserable excuse for a human being, Burke racked his brain for an escape. He would not give in to her and the desperate craving for death that was certain to follow. He, Burke Nathaniel Kennedy, was worth more than that. He deserved to live without constant putdowns, and he deserved to be happy. Though he now longer felt the need to cry, he kept on, using the sobs to mask his true intentions. Subtly, slowly, he slid his hand into his pocket, fingering his cell phone. Hoping he was hitting the right buttons, he pressed the speed dial for home, careful to cover the earpiece so Chris' voice would not be heard. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chris ambled into the kitchen, yelling at the phone that he was coming. "Hello?" No one said anything in reply, only music playing in the background. "Hello? Who is this?" Again, nothing. "Last chance. Going. Going. Gone." Right before he hung up, a voice rang through. "You know you're taking the long way to the airport." Chris brought the receiver back to his ear. "Hello? I didn't catch that. I think you may have a wrong number." "Be quiet, Burke. I know where I'm going," he heard a woman say. "All I'm saying is that there are much quicker ways to get there." Chris gasped. "Burke? Burke, what's going on?" He began to pace the floor, listening to the conversation. "Burke! Answer me! What's happening?" "Just shut your mouth!" "Really, if you are going to take me home, I figured you'd want to get to the airport as quickly as possible. La Monte Avenue will get you there eventually, but there are shorter ways." That statement was all Chris needed to hear. Searching frantically, he grabbed his cell phone from the living room and dialed the police. "Hello? This is Christopher Kirkpatrick. My son has been kidnapped." He knew instantly that he shouldn't have identified himself, sure that the cops often took prank phone calls from people pretending to be members of NSYNC. "Yes, sir. Kidnapped. He used his cell to call here, and I've been listening to the conversation...No, sir. They are on their way to the airport, currently on La Monte." He was quickly losing patience with the officer, wanting action now and questions later. "I tell you what. You send a couple of cars that direction, and I'll meet you at the airport. Then you will see I'm telling the truth...Thank you. His name is Burke Kennedy...He's my adopted son. He's about five foot, ten inches tall, a hundred and twenty pounds, light brown hair and gray eyes. I think he was wearing a red t-shirt with a sun on the chest, and black denim shorts." To prove his honesty, Chris brought the two telephones together. "Just listen." "Fine, just go down La Monte Avenue. I actually live here, but what do I know?" "I told you to be quiet, Burke. If you don't, I'll shut your mouth for you." "And how exactly are you going to get me on a plane if I'm bleeding and bruised." A loud smack came over the line, skin against skin. "Damn it! That hurt! Now I have another cut on my face." Chris got back on with the cop. "Now do you believe me? Yes, sir. Thank you. I'm on my way." Not worrying about locking the front door, he sprinted to his car, still listening to Burke and his mother.That's it for now people! I already know I'm going to receive at least two different types of responses for this chapter: 1) It's timeliness, 2) The cliffhanger. I sincerely apologize for both. Gateway takes a couple of weeks to deliver, and sometimes a story needs a bit of suspense. But aren't you glad Burke isn't giving up? Or that I didn't leave you hanging with a gunshot?
I'd love to hear from each and everyone of you. You can write me at cameronwriter@hotmail.com
Always,
Cameron
P.S. Applications for boyfriends now being accepted! All will be considered! You: Funny, brilliant (in any way), trustworthy, loyal, at least mildly handsome (even if it's just you who thinks so), and able to put up with a quirky (read: slightly neurotic), neat freak, creative type. ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!