Kyle and Me Disclaimer: This story is about men having sex with men. If that's not your thing or you're too young to read it, please leave now. The author has no knowledge of Kyle and Lane Carlson's sexuality, nor that of any other celebrity that may be mentioned here, and has written this purely as a work of erotic fantasy fiction. Enjoy!
Kyle and Me - Part 2 By Remiel78
He's not? My mind began to wrap itself around those words. I was still staring into his eyes. Not exactly a bad sight? Who the hell am I kidding, he's fucking gorgeous, but I didn't think I would ever see this much of him. Turning away from him I finally slid my hands to my cheek and they were beyond hot.
"Seth," Kyle called out in a voice a soft yet husky tone. "Am I embarrassing you?"
Is he embarrassing me? Is he for real? Hell yeah I'm embarrassed. I shook my head then nodded a bit. I don't know. I think it's best that I remain silent. If I say something right now I'll make a fool out of myself.
"Hey," he started, but instead of continuing he put is hand on my shoulder. This wasn't happening. This isn't happening. I had to repeat it to myself a couple of times, before I acknowledge that his hand was on my shoulder. Glancing towards it I made sure I didn't turn around. I wasn't sure if he was dressed or not. I would settle for a towel around the waist right now.
"Seth?" I hadn't realized it, but Kyle had been saying something and it completely slipped passed me.
"Sorry." It's all I could manage at the moment. My cheeks were still red. Who knew if he could tell? All I know was that he was touching my shoulder. I blinked a couple of times attempting to gather my wits.
What the hell was wrong with me? I've seen scantily clad men before. I've seen men in the buff before. I wasn't the one that was after a Carlson twin, but the revelation that he wasn't sorry was still sinking in. Not to mention that he seemed to like the attention. And his hand was still on me. There was a slight gasp and if I hadn't been biting my tongue I would've squeaked or done something in the realm of lameness that I was about to sink into. I was on the cusp of it ready to slide in. I know I am. It's just one of those things, like Murphy's Law. It's a curse. Silence is my friend.
Talk, say something, do something.
"Just caught me off guard that's all, Kyle," I responded. I'm not sure how much time passed, but I knew he was going to start to wonder.
"I tend to do that sometimes." His hand slipped from my shoulder and there was a mix of sadness and relief. I like the feel of his hand there. I like the way he had caressed my shoulder. It was one of those firm squeezes that says a bit more than a gentle one does. It was, `Are you ok? I'm here.' I desperately wanted to tell him not to let go.
Wait? That's not a thought I should be having. Is it?
Somewhere in the middle of my mental ramblings Kyle has slipped away and slipped on a pair of jeans. I heard the zipper, but things were barely registering. It wasn't until he stepped in front of me that I noticed that he was clothed, not completely, but at least he wasn't naked down under any more. Johnny's going to kill me.
I felt like I was in high school discovering boys for the first time. Not like I didn't know they were there, but when you reach high school things are different. Anything before that is a passing thought. You're mind is starting to go places that it didn't go before and you start to see how much you're changing and how everyone else is changing around you. Hard bodies, deeper voices, facial, body hair, it's all around the corner and it's starting to catch your eye. Sounds, smells, sights it's all becoming intense, but it in a different way. The glide of someone's body against yours sends a shiver along your spine and you try to figure out way. It was accidental collision, but for you it's explosion of sensations that you didn't even know where there.
This thing inside you starts to spread across your body. You don't know where it starts your head or down below or maybe in your stomach. Definitely not butterflies, because sometimes it pulls tight and sometimes it moves from place to place. It feels warm, it feels hot. You feel so fucking frustrated and then you find a way to let it all out. A few strokes feel nice, few more feel better and then you find if you do it more and faster it'll just lead you to the eventual release. It's your own Independence Day complete with fireworks and cannon fire.
"Seth?" Kyle's eyes haven't left mine, but I'm a million miles away at the moment. I take a deep breath trying to remember to remain calm. Why did he say that? It was an accident, that's all right.
"I forget a couple of things, over there." I motion to the table in the corner behind the photo set area, or whatever you call it. I do know the name of it. I think I do. I need to stop looking at his eyes. I need to tear away from them and get what I needed to get.
"What did mean?" I don't know where it came from, but the words were slipping from my lips.
"By," he responded.
"What you said.about not being sorry." I could feel my lips pressing into a thin line. Can't be helped happens when I'm thinking.
"I wasn't sorry." A hint of a smile appeared on his lips. He didn't really answer the question, but who was I to badger it out of him. This was so awkward. I did my best to keep my eyes else where, but I couldn't stay focused on his eyes. They pulled me in more and his lips looked so cute like that. I could feel my teeth chewing at that inside of my lower lip.
It's been six months since I broke up with Brian and this is the first time that I'm actually taking notice in another guy. First time that anyone else has filled my mind and it's Kyle Carlson, someone that just isn't.I don't know gay? But he said he wasn't sorry. What does that mean? I want to know what that means.
My eyes do something bad and move from his face down along his neck towards his shoulders. They shouldn't be on his shoulders. They're strong, their broad and I could see the muscle there. It's nothing overdone or scary. It's right. I could lay my head on his shoulders for hours and his chest.God what am I doing? I stop myself right there, just in time to hear a slight chuckle. Was it a chuckle?
"It's ok, Seth." He sounded closer. Was he closer again? God I think I'm blind. I should be able to see in front of me right. What the hell is wrong with me?
Lifting my head up my eyes caught his, indeed he was closer. When did that happen? I remembered why this isn't happening, I'm so far out of his league. Taking a step back he tilts his head reaching out for my face and it stops me. I should be moving away, but I don't. You don't move away from things like that. Well, technically you can, but I didn't want to. I want to feel his hand on my face. I want to see what would happen. "Kyle."
He didn't say a word; his hand simply fell upon my face, cupping it gently at the side his thumb stroking it absently. Why is he doing this? "Johnny put you up to this." It was a logical assumption. With the way he had been carrying out. It was just a matter of us running into one another; me coming back for the stuff was just convenient, that's all.
"Johnny didn't put me up to anything." He took a step closer and I could feel myself slowly leaning into the hand. Please don't let go. Please don't stop. He looked at me as if he knew what I was saying. It had to be my eyes. People tend to say I that can be quite expressive. I guess this was one of those moments.
If Johnny didn't put him up to it why was he doing this? Why am I doing this? I'm not interested am I? My eyes move to his chest down to the waist band of his jeans that were unbuttoned. Ordinarily I'm not self conscious about my looks, but at the moment I was.
"I'm curious." He's curious about what? The gay thing? That's what flies through my head. God I'm some type of fucking experiment.
"About what? Being..." I'm about to blurt it out when he shakes his head.
"About you." Our words almost run over one another.
"What?"
"I'm curious about you, Seth." Why in the world would he be curious about me? There's nothing special about me. My head starts shaking. "Sick..."
"What?"
"This is a sick fucking joke, Kyle." My voice is already starting to falter. I stop it a moment later pulling way from him. My eyes have already fallen to the ground. "Don't say things that aren't true."
"How do you know what's true for me? Why can't you." If I didn't know any better I'd say he sounded a bit frustrated. What did Kyle Carlson know about me? What did I know about him? Outside of what other people have told us next to nothing.
"People.don't." Not since Brian and I know this isn't real. I began to wring out my hands, fingers playing among one another in an attempt to draw attention from my face and my eyes. "People have standards."
People have standards. The moment it I said it I remembered the first time I heard it. I remember everything that's ever been said or not said when people look at me, when I've shown interest or otherwise. You don't measure up. You're not what I'm looking for. You're too big. If you lost some weight. No.
The words flow in and out of my head, along with the events associated with them. Remembering that, hearing that just reminds me how absurd this is. It's a game. It's a joke.
"Yeah, they do. I do, but they're my standards. Not people's, not society's." He's lying. He has to be. In a way I feel like I'm not giving him a chance, but why would I put myself on the line like that? I've heard it before.
Teresa says it's all about the way you carry yourself and I think I carry myself quite well. There are a few things I can improve on, but I do ok. I'm not looking. I so wasn't looking. My head moves back and forth, left and right attempting to deny what he's saying. I'm hearing it all wrong. This is some warped dream, a nightmare that's beginning to be indulged. I chose not to. Voluntary torture is not on the menu tonight. Sorry.
"Is it that hard to believe that someone would be curious about you, Seth?"
In small word, yes.
"This is absurd, Kyle. You don't know what you're talking about." I'm taking control of the situation. I'm not about to do this. Why do I feel trapped? Why do I feel like the walls are closing in on me? My heart's pounding and I don't know why. Where is this coming from?
"You intrigue me." He doesn't stop he keeps saying these things that don't make any sense. I'm a very logical person. Both feet are on the ground. I floated away to the clouds once, a dozen times and I've found myself crushed beneath the heavy heel of reality countless times, but I kept on going. The last time was too much.
"You don't even know me," I whisper in a shaky voice. Why is this affecting me so much? I went from being embarrassed to wanting and long to terrified. It's the words it has to be the words. I'm ready dash away, do something, but instead I find myself pressed up against a wall.
Where the hell did that come from?
"Ergo, curious." He smiled at me and there's something about it that just made me wonder. It made me want him to be curious. I don't even know what I feel at the moment. The idea that someone would be curious about me is so over my head.
"Come on, Seth. You can't be that self conscious." Can't I? Who wouldn't be around him? Ok maybe other models that thought they were the shit, but he was really down to earth in a way. It's not like I didn't expect or anything. I know people in the business. I know the ones that are completely in the stratosphere and ones who are really grounded. I'm looking at one of the grounded ones even though he's pulled me through a magical gate into bizarro world.
"I guess you're not interested." His shoulders rose lightly and fell. I just didn't know what to say. Hot as fuck comes to mind, but it was that same thing that kept me from really accepting the idea that he could actually want to get to know me.
"I don't know what I am." Pausing in my words my eyes moved to his. I have to look him in the eyes. I have to. I need to. ".it's a bit sudden, not to mention." I don't even think I can say. My lips part to speak, curving a bit, but nothing comes out.
"Me in the buff?"
"For starters." He chuckled a bit and I blushed.
"Sweet!"
"What?"
"I can make you blush." I guess he hadn't noticed all the heavy blushing I was doing back there.
"That's a good thing," I ask.
"Hell yeah! If I can't make you blush I don't got much going for me do I?" A funny sound entered the air. It took a couple of seconds for it to register that it was a giggle and that it was coming from me. A light smile that slowly began on Kyle lips blossomed into one of the most beautiful smiles I had ever seen. He was the sun and I was the flower desperate for his light and gentle caress of warmth.
My eyes move down along with my lashes and for the first time in a long time I felt, timid in a good way. He was aggressive, but in a good way. A way that makes you want to reach out and see what happens. I wasn't attempting to study him. I just didn't know. I was the one that was intrigued.
"So."
"Yeah, so." So what? What now? He's guiding me along this journey right now. Is this happening? Is this real? All those things go unsaid as my eyes slide up towards his. I try to keep my eyes there because I'm trying to be good and not objectify him. I don't want him to think I think of him as a piece of a meat.
"Is this happening?"
He ran his tongue across his lips. They were soft, pink, just the right shade, like petals on flower. I've seen him before. I've seen him a lot of times, but I've never looked at Kyle this way. I was with Brian. It was different then. You notice hot guys, handsome guys, sexy guys, but you don't, at least I didn't, analyze them this much. I didn't let my eyes trail over their body studying every detail, right down to the slight movements of their chests as they breathed, but none have been this close and said what he's said.
"Could be, if we let it. If we want it to." His voice was echoing in my mind. I played the words over and over again and I didn't want to hide. I didn't want to be scared. The fear was there, but it was shrinking. It was slowly being pressed down.
I didn't sink with it. I felt like I was bouncing, but I didn't move. My entire body was bouncing as if it was ready to do something, ready to leap into the air. My anchors were gone. Where they went I don't know. I was losing myself in the moment and the blue of his eyes. They were my sky.
Is this happening? Is this real? My heart tells me it's real, because it's about to burst out of my chest. "Kyle." There's no answer. Just movement. Movement to my shoulders. I jump, he doesn't. "Sorry."
He smiles. It's so cute. I press my lips together running my tongue across them in secret but he knows.
His hands move from my shoulders to my neck, featherlike touches along the way until he reaches the side of my face. He doesn't need to force it, it's already turning and he's moving closer. We're both moving closer. My lifts up. He's taller than me a little or maybe it's just a reflex.
Is this real?
His lips touch mine; pressing gently and I return the affection allowing my eyes to shut. This is so very real.
TO BE CONTINUED --------------------------------------------------- What do you think? Feedback and suggestions? remiel78@hotmail.com