Knots

Matt

No one talked much on the way home from Andy's. There wasn't any way I was going to defend myself. It was embarrassing enough having them think we were all jacking off together. We drove into the garage and headed into the house where my dad pointed to the kitchen table and said, "Sit." He gave me a serious look. "I don't know if you heard yet, but on Monday, they'll be selecting a jury for Dillon's trial. You're going to be called to testify. I'm not sure if you'll have to get on the stand or not. We're waiting to hear from the district attorney."

That was all we needed on top of everything else. "He's going on trial already? I figured these things take a long time. Are you sure?"

"Unfortunately, yes. From what I could get from the district attorney, was they figured this would be a short trial. They have three witnesses to statutory rape and I guess they'd like to get it behind them."

I bit my lip. "You've seen how the defense lawyers treat victims. They'll be all over me. The Burke's have a lot of money and probably have a damn good lawyer."

My mom got a glass of water. "We understand that. It's important for you start to think about your testimony. Your dad and I don't think you and Andy should talk about it because the lawyers might accuse you of collaborating against Dillon. The same goes for the other two boys."

"Our concern is that if the four of you have been fooling around, it could come out in court and affect your testimony," my dad added.

I scowled. "Why would that make any difference?"

"They could say you boys wanted to have sex and it didn't make any difference what Dillon did. The defense might say he's a good looking guy, starting quarterback, dated a lot of girls and wasn't interested in boys. They could imply you guys were fooling around all along and you went after Dillon."

"But he raped me. I wasn't fooling around then." Oh shit, I thought. Did I just say then? "I didn't mean it that way. I just meant fooling around, unless you count masturbating together as being sex-crazed teenagers who'd go after Dillon." I scratched my nose to see if it was growing longer. Fairy tale or not, I thought it might actually happen.

My mom got a concerned look. "You're telling us the truth, you haven't been having sex, right?

I gave them a repentant sheepish look. "NO, and I'm sorry. You know Andy's gay. He and Randy might have been fooling around, but Thomas and I haven't."

My dad stared at me pointedly. "You say that, but you already lied to us once. How do we know you won't do it again? You've never lied to us before, but you did lie this time, and there have to be consequences. Your mom and I decided we are grounding you for the next two weeks. Come home right after football practice. You can't go anywhere on the weekends. Andy, Thomas, and Randy can't come over. You can talk to Andy on the phone as long as one of us is with you."

"How 'bout Thomas?"

My mother smiled. "I think he'll be okay. He seems like a nice boy."

I agreed with her. He is a nice boy, but that sure didn't mean he didn't like sucking and fucking with the rest of us. But then, he did say we could be friends without benefits. At the time, I was happy to just have Thomas as a friend without benefits. It seemed like it was probably the best we were going to get anyway.

She nodded. "I guess that'll be all right. You can talk on the phone, but no one is to come over."

I wanted to argue, but figured I'd slip up like I already had.

"Do you have anything you want to say?" my dad asked.

"No, I understand. I'm grounded for two weeks and can only talk on the phone. How 'bout if Ernie, Alan, Gina, or Emily want to come by?"

He smiled. "Talk to them at school."

A big sigh exited my mouth. "Can I call Andy now?"

My mom moved to the kitchen to start dinner. "Call him after dinner. In the meantime, you probably have homework to do."

I headed to my room. Unlike other teenagers, it didn't have much in it. There were pictures of well-known football and basketball players on the walls for color and inspiration. They hung in various angles to give them some variety. When I was younger, I put those shiny glow-in-the dark stars on my ceiling and I loved looking at them as I lay on my back before going to sleep. I didn't have a stereo, a computer, or a TV. My parents wanted me to do everything with them. Usually my mom had me do my homework in the kitchen while she made dinner, but I think she figured I had enough for the day.

There was a picture of Andy and me on my desk. We had our arms over each other's shoulders. It made me smile at first. I thought Those were the days. But the smile slipped from my face when I thought of how happy and innocent we were then and how now, instead of having our arms over each other's shoulders, we had our cocks in each other's ass or mouth. And as much as I loved the sex, my life was beginning to feel empty.

My room was small compared to Andy's. You could barely fit the two twin beds. The one luxury, I had was the carpet on my floor. My room wasn't much compared to all my friends' bedrooms. Andy had everything in his room.

At dinner my parents and I talked a little more about the trial. My dad kept warning me. "Whatever you do, be sure you tell the truth. Don't say something just because you want to hurt Dillon. Keep your answers short."

"I already know all this stuff, Dad. We've watched enough lawyer programs around here that we could be lawyers ourselves."

He grinned. "I know. I know. But we just want it to go well and see you go through as little pain as possible."

I immediately thought of the word hedonist because I sure wanted to avoid pain while still enjoying all the pleasure.

My dad went on. "The accused has a right to face his accusers in court so I'm afraid you'll have to testify. Your mom and I think we should have you talk to a counselor. A lot happened."

"That's okay. I'm fine.

I called Andy as soon as dinner was over. My mom was washing dishes and my dad was in the living room reading the paper.

"Andy, I'm grounded for two weeks. No one can come over. How 'bout you?"

"I'm grounded too. My dad took my phone away. I can only use the phone in the kitchen. They're eavesdropping now."

"My mom is too. They're selecting the jury for Dillon's trial on Monday. It looks like we're going to have to testify."

"I heard about it. Maybe we should talk."

"My parents don't think so. They don't want it to appear we coordinated our stories."

Then he whispered into the phone. "Where are we going to fuck?"

"That's not important now. We have the trial. I'm trying to beat out Kutcher and my grades have been slipping."

My mom looked over at me.

"My mom just gave me a dirty look about my grades. They're not bad, but I should spend more time on them. Maybe a couple weeks or being grounded will be good."

"Damn, Matt, you're easy. Two weeks of grounding is going to be hell. My mom is grinning."

I shook my head. "Andy, talking like this is hell. Let's talk at school tomorrow, okay?"

"Sounds good. See you tomorrow."

Andy

I can't believe how everything changed. It was weird talking to Matt in front of my parents. It was so easy to go back to my room and talk about all the sex we had planned. Well, we really didn't always talk about sex, but I never realized how free having your own phone makes you.

The four of us met in front of the school the next morning. Gina and Emily walked by and wanted to know what was going on.

"Sorry ladies," I said, "but we have some personal stuff to talk about. Let's talk at lunch."

Emily gave me a dirty look. "What do you guys have to talk about that we can't know? We already know everything there is to know about you."

"Not everything," Randy said.

I wanted to punch him in the mouth. Fortunately, Gina grabbed Emily by the wrist. "Let's go and let these guys talk." She turned to me. "We'll see you at lunch, won't we?"

Matt nodded. "Of course."

Emily frowned as Gina led her off by the wrist. "Are you guys going to tell us what's going on at lunch?"

I tossed her a smile. "Like Matt said, of course."

"You promise?"

"We promise."

They walked off looking a little hurt.

I turned to Thomas and Randy. "Matt and I are both grounded. Looks like there's not going to be any more fucking for at least two weeks."

Thomas muttered. "I can live with that."

Randy scowled. "I'm not sure I can. If you guys aren't available, Thomas and I'll just have to find some action ourselves."

Thomas gave Randy a nudge in the ribs. "Speak for yourself."

Matt frowned. "Dillon's trial is coming up too. We'll have to testify. It will be better if we don't do anything. My parents still have their suspicions, but my dad was right when he said we don't want Dillon's lawyers to use our fucking around against us."

Randy grinned. "You mean, they might think we're horny gay teenage whores? Hell, Dillon lured us and paid us. We didn't pay him. I was just a sweet innocent kid before Dillon."

I leaned into him with my shoulder. "And now look at you, you're a horny gay teenage whore."

The first bell rang as Randy responded. "You're right there with me, Andy. These other two still seem to have a little of their innocence left. I'm not so sure about you and me. I bet the first thing you thought about when you got grounded was when and where were we going to fuck. Right?"

There's nothing worse than someone you hardly know, knowing you so well. "Kind of," I replied.

"Don't give me that shit. You know that's what you thought." He pointed at Thomas and Matt. "I bet that wasn't the first thing they thought of. Am I right?"

They both nodded.

"See, I told you. They haven't completely lost their innocence. I have, and I don't give a shit. I plan to get as much sex as I can and love every minute of it. You only live once and at our age I can get a hard-on ten times a day. That foursome you arranged, Andy, was awesome, especially the last one. I can't wait for us to do it again."

Matt snapped. "Well, you're going to have to wait. There's too much going on right now. We're grounded and there's the trial." He glanced at Randy. "Aren't you worried about the trial?"

"I don't much give a shit. The asshole seduced Thomas and me. I'm gay. So what?"

Matt frowned. "I don't want everyone to know I might be gay. We get enough shit as it is. We don't need it. Besides, I want to beat out that asshole Kutcher for the QB job. None of this will help."

Thomas nodded toward the main entrance. "We'd better go before the final bell rings. Let's talk before or after practice."

Everyone nodded and we headed to class.

Emily and Gina were sitting at our usual table looking smug and pissed off at the same time.

Emily glared at me. "Glad to see you guys didn't think yourselves too good to join us for lunch."

"Come on Em. We needed to talk about Dillon's trial. We're probably going to get subpoenas this week and be interviewed by the DA to make sure our stories haven't changed. We just needed to talk."

"Seems to me, the thing you shouldn't be doing is talking to each other where everyone can see you. Someone can use that against you, saying you were all trying to get your stories straight."

Matt groaned. "That's what my dad said."

A couple girls walked by. "Hey Andy. When are you going to ask me out again. I showed you a good time, didn't I? Haven't seen you out with a girl in a long time."

I waved them off. "Just taking a break."

The tall brunette turned back. "I'll be waiting for your call."

Emily smiled. "I guess she'll be waiting till she dies."

"Maybe I'm a switch hitter," I replied.

"Then you better ask me out first."

Gina grabbed Matt's hand and interlocked their fingers. "I'm glad you don't swing both ways. I want you all to myself."

I cleared my throat. "What makes you think he doesn't?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I just know." She paused. "So Dillon's going to trial. I didn't think you'd have to testify."

Thomas and Randy started to walk by with their lunches. Thomas stopped. "Mind if we join you?"

Matt gave him a big smile. "Not at all. The more the merrier."

It always surprises me how many people you can get around a round table.

Gina slid closer to Matt to make room for Thomas. Emily moved over so Randy could sit. But just as he started to sit, a senior waved him over. "Sorry, I have something this guy wants."

Thomas, Matt, and I gave each other a look.

"What?" Emily asked.

I scratched my cheek. "Oh, nothing."

Emily narrowed her eyes. "Seems like there's a lot going on that you're not telling us. Out with it." She turned to Matt. You're awfully quiet, Matt. What's going on?"

Matt squeezed Gina's hand. "Nothing. Just worried about the trial is all."

"Why do you even have to testify? I thought young victims don't have to."

Matt shifted on the bench. "I was hoping that too, but the defendant has a right to face their accusers. That's what my dad said. And besides, we're not considered little kids anymore. It's probably different for kids who are younger than ten. But I don't know for sure."

Gina snuggled up to Matt. "So that means you have to tell all the gory details?"

"I think so."

Emily gave us a serious look. "That means Dillon's attorney will get to cross examine you. I hear the Burkes got a good one. He could be tough. They'll ask you all kinds of personal questions. And since you're not the defendant, I don't think you can take the fifth."

"Emily, shut up," I said. "I wasn't all that worried, and now you're scaring the hell out of me."

Emily took her lipstick out of her purse. "You have to be prepared." She twisted it open. "Just be sure you tell the truth. Don't get caught in a lie." She put the lipstick on and then rubbed her lips together. "There, now I'm beautiful again."

I couldn't help myself. "It's going to take more than that."

She laughed. "You might be right, but at least I won't have to tell the world about my exploits with Dillon Burke."

"You really know how to hurt a guy, don't you?"

She smacked her lips together. "Yeah, so watch it."

The bell rang and Thomas hadn't said a word the whole time he was at the table. He just kept his eyes on Gina and Matt.

Randy was still talking to the senior. He wrote something down as he got ready to head to class. Thomas joined him and we all headed our separate ways except for Matt and Gina, who had the same English class.

When I got home from school I found out there were other parts to my punishment. My parents took my computer, TV, and stereo out of my room. My room looked naked. What's a guy to do with no porn to beat off too?

Of course my first thought when all this happened was where are we going to fuck? While that seemed like the most important thing at the time, seeing my room stripped of its gadgets made me realize there are other things as important as where we were going to fuck.

I confronted my parents and we got into a big argument. Finally, I gave up and went to my sad empty room.

Matt

Gina and I held hands during lunch. I really like it when she snuggles up to me. It's hard to explain. Maybe because guys don't usually do things like that. Or they won't because everyone would look and call them fags. But I couldn't picture me snuggling up to Andy or him me. With us it's friendship and sex. And lately it's been more about sex. But even as friends, we'd never snuggle or hold hands. Maybe that's why it's different with Gina.

Thomas stared at Gina and me all during lunch and didn't say a word. I'd sure like to know what was going through his head.

Gina and I had English together and when we got to class the white board was filled with quotes from Oscar Wilde. There were fifteen. I'd heard that Wilde was gay, or at least bisexual. From the quotes, you could tell he had a biting whit and an insight to human nature.

I've listed a few of them here:

"True friends stab you in the front."

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."

"Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much."

"Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead."

"Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes."

"I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying."

"I can resist everything but temptation."

"There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it."

"I see when men love women, they give them but a little of their lives. But women, when they love, give everything."

"Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live."

The bell rang and Gina and I took our seats. Mr. Abbott, waited for us to read the quotes. Two of them caught my eye: "Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes" and "I can resist everything but temptation." The last one made me laugh. It was so true, and God only knows, I'd made my share of mistakes and was getting plenty of experience. The problem was, it might have been experience of the wrong kind. But how was I to know. I was only fifteen.

Mr. Abbott cleared his throat. "Why do you think I put these quotes on the board?" He stared at our blank faces.

No one said anything until Gina raised her hand.

Wouldn't you know it, I thought.

"We're going to read Oscar Wilde."

"That's right, Miss Lockhart."

Jerrod, one of the boys Andy got in a fight with, yelled, "Why do we have to read these old guys. Why can't we read the vampire series?"

Mr. Abbott smiled. "Thanks for that, Jerrod, but I think you mean, the Twilight Series."

"Oh yeah. Couldn't think of it."

Well Jerrod, I think you'll like this one. It's called, The Picture of Dorian Gray.

James exclaimed. "Doesn't sound interesting to me."

Sally, groaned. "Is that all you boys do is complain. Give it a chance. What's it about Mr. Abbott?"

"It's about a man whose portrait ages while he keeps his youth. Think about it. How many of you wish a picture someone took of you with their phone aged while you remained young all your life. Would you want that?"

"Hell yes," Jerrod yelled

"So you're interested now?"

He stood, saluted, and clicked his heals like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. "Yes sir, Mr. Abbott. I'm interested."

"Glad to hear that. Are you interested enough to pass the books out?"

Jerrod snapped his heels again. "Yes, sir. Mr. Abbott."

Jerrod grabbed a stack of books from the front of the class and motioned for James to come and help him. James slid out of his desk and groaned.

I'll have to admit the whole idea of the story fascinated me. What if I could always look fifteen while everyone aged around me? It sounded good at first, but then I wondered what it would be like to still be fifteen when Andy, Thomas, Gina, Emily, Alan, and Ernie were forty-five. Mr. Abbott had peaked my interest.

Mr. Abbott went on to tell us about Oscar Wilde. It sounded like he was an unhappy man, but his sarcasm and sense of humor seemed contrary to his life. Mr. Abbott quickly explained that he was married with two children when he had an affair with the twenty-something son of an aristocrat. The boy's father accused him of being a sodomite. Wilde took the dad to court, and after losing the court battle, exiled himself to Paris where he got sick and died at 46. I felt sorry for him and his whole family.

"What's a sodomite," James asked.

Mr. Abbott turned red. "I suggest you look it up in the dictionary."

The class groaned.

But I knew what a sodomite was. It was a guy who fucks other guys. I could just see Dillon Burke's lawyer accusing us of being sodomites, and like Oscar Wilde, we might protest, but would still be guilty.

Jerrod slammed a book on my desk. The cover had the profile picture of a young man standing in front of a painting of a wrinkled old man. The thought of the Burke lawyer cross-examining me made me want to grow old and die. But, at the same time I couldn't wait to read The Picture of Dorian Gray.

Quotes: The quotes for this week are in the stor

I'd like to wish all my readers a Happy Holiday. May the New Year bring you many successes and a lot of experiences (or mistakes as Oscar Wilde would say) that make you a better and more insightful person. Don't forget "There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." - Oscar Wilde

Contact me at eliassctt@gmail.com I answer all emails.

I'd like to thank Lisa for taking the time to edit Knots. As the author, I take final responsibility for all parts of the story, including any errors.

This story is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author's imagination and are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, events or locales, is purely coincidental and no slanderous intent is implied.