Hey everyone!! First let me say that I am so sorry that this installment has been so long in coming. I've tried on several occasions to finish it, but you know how it is when other people have need of your time.......lol. Anyway, I hope that you enjoy, and have enjoyed the story. To all my chat friends; you're the greatest, and you know who you are. To all my readers; thanks for reading, it's been one hell of a ride. Much Luv to Ya!!
This story is a work of fiction. I do not know the true sexuality of either Backstreet Boys, or Nsync. If you are not at least 18 years old, or are offended by homosexual material, then, this story is NOT for you.
Kevin and Joey Chapter 10
Morning found things much the way they were the previous night. The only exception being, that a missing Kevin, had found his way into Joey's room. Although, it was already 10 a.m., Joey was still sound asleep, unaware that anyone else was there.
Kevin sat, across the room watching, as the sunlight dimly ran it's course over Joey's unconscious body. He thought to himself how beautiful Joey looked as he lay there in peaceful slumber. He was to Kevin as a peaceful brook flowing on a cool, country evening. His very presence soothed him, calmed him, comforted him.
He sat there, never taking his eyes off him. For a second, Joey shifted his position, causing the sun to reflect against his pillow. Kevin could see the stains caused by the tears he had obviously shed the prior evening. His heart gripped him as he was overcome with guilt. Suddenly, he was shaken from his thoughts by movement.
As Kevin looked on, Joey began to wake. Still unaware of his presence, Joey turned, looking at the clock. He rolled onto his back, as he covered his face with his hands, running them upward through his hair. As he lay there, the events of the night before came rushing back to him. He knew in a matter of hours, he would be leaving, and there was still so much to say.
"Well, are you gonna lay there all day?" Kevin asked, startling Joey a bit.
"Kev?" Joey asked, making sure it was really him.
"You were expecting someone else?" Kevin asked, giving him a smile.
"No, I'm just surprised to see you, that's all." Joey responded, sitting up in his bed.
"Are you okay?" Kevin asked, as he took a seat on the bed next to him.
"Yeah, I'm okay." Joey answered, as he looked into Kevin's eyes.
Kevin could see much more in Joey's eyes than he really expected. They held the evidence of a long night of pain, frustration, and confusion.
"Joey, are you sure you're okay. You don't look so good." Kevin said, running his hand along Joey's face.
Kevin's touch caused many emotions to surface in Joey. He closed his eyes as he felt him caress his neck and shoulder. As he opened them, he could see concern in those beautiful green pools that he'd fallen in love with only days ago.
"I'm fine, Kev. I just had a bad night." Joey said, taking Kevin's hand in his, and giving it a slight squeeze.
"I take it things, with JC, didn't go well?" Kevin said, in a questioning tone.
"Actually, things went very well." Joey said, confusing Kevin.
"Then, why are you so upset?" Kevin asked, giving Joey a perplexed look.
"What makes you think I'm upset?" Joey asked, regretting the words as they left his mouth.
Kevin didn't answer. He just reached behind Joey and pulled one of the tear stained pillows into view.
Joey took one look at the pillow, causing the tears to, once again, glaze his vision. Although, he tried his best to hide it, it was clear that something was terribly wrong.
"Joey? What's going on, man?" Kevin asked, becoming more and more concerned.
"Why didn't you tell me about your talk with JC?" Joey asked, point blank.
"He told you?" Kevin asked.
"Yes, he did." Joey said.
"Baby, I would have told you, but I felt that he needed to do that." Kevin said, being truthful with him.
"That's okay. I understand why you did it. I was just kind of shocked, I guess." Joey said, trying to explain how he felt.
"Shocked, that I didn't tell you?" Kevin asked, becoming confused.
"No, shocked about what JC told me." Joey answered, clearing things up for him.
"Oh, so he told you everything, then?" Kevin asked, wondering if Joey knew the whole story.
"Yeah, I think so." Joey said, almost positive that everything was out in the open.
"What did he say?" Kevin asked, wondering if JC had gone through with it.
"He told me, that he was in love with me." Joey answered, looking directly at Kevin.
Although, he was expecting that answer, it still caused a stabbing pain in his chest.
"Kev, are you okay?" Joey asked, seeing his fallen expression.
"Yeah, I'm fine. How did you take the news?" Kevin asked, not sure if he wanted to hear the answer.
"Not too well, I was shocked. I had no idea he felt that way." Joey answered, reliving it all in his mind.
"So, what did you say?" Kevin asked.
"Kevin, you know that I love you, right?" Joey asked, his nervous state betraying his voice.
"Yes, I do. What did you say to him, Joey?" Kevin asked, his fear being strengthened, by Joey's avoidance of the subject.
"You know that I would never do anything to hurt you, right?" Joey asked, as Kevin stood to his feet.
"Oh my God! Tell me you didn't." Kevin said, before he could stop himself.
"Kevin, please, sit down." Joey said, patting the area that Kevin had just left.
"Just tell me," Kevin said, not even looking at him.
"No, I didn't sleep with him, if that's what you're asking." Joey said, looking at Kevin's back.
"Then, what happened?" Kevin asked, his heart momentarily spared.
"Kev, please, sit down." Joey said, causing that same fear to attack Kevin's very being.
Kevin turned for a minute looking at Joey's saddened expression, before making his way to a nearby chair, and taking a seat.
"Okay, I'm listening." Kevin said, leaning forward in his chair.
"I didn't sleep with, Josh, but I did kiss him." Joey said, barely able to look at him.
"I see." Kevin said, sitting back in his chair.
"It wasn't Josh's fault, Kev. I, kissed him." Joey said, hoping beyond hope that Kevin wouldn't be mad at JC.
"Why? Why would you do something like that?" Kevin asked, his heart aching within him.
"Kevin, there's something that I have never told you." Joey said, ashamed of his betrayal.
"Really, and what would that be?" Kevin asked, the hurt evident in his voice.
"I don't know how to say it." Joey said, his emotions over loading.
"Just tell me, Joey." Kevin said, not knowing if he would be able to handle much more.
"I'm in love with him, Kev. I have been for a few years now. I never dreamed that he felt the same way." Joey said, rushing his words.
"You're in love with him?" Kevin asked, not sure he actually heard the words.
"Kev, I'm so sorry." Joey started, only to be interrupted.
"How? How could you say that you love me?" Kevin asked, his heart already feeling the pain.
"Kevin, I do love you, but I love him, too." Joey said, hating himself for the pain he was causing him.
"I can't believe this is happening." Kevin said, running his fingers through his hair as he looked out the window.
"Kev, I swear. I never meant for any of this to happen." Joey said, his words being of no comfort.
"So, what happens now?" Kevin asked, although his heart already told him the answer.
"Kev," Joey started, as Kevin interrupted him.
"You're leaving me. Aren't you?" Kevin asked, leaning his head against the window.
"Kev, I," Joey started, unable to find the words.
Kevin turned and walked towards the door, grabbing his bag out of the chair, on the way.
"Kev, please," Joey said, as he walked to him touching his shoulder.
"Don't, just don't." Kevin said, as he stopped, holding up his hand to silence, Joey.
"Kev, please, don't leave. I didn't do this to hurt you. I swear." Joey said, pleading with him.
"Yeah, well, it hurts just the same." Kevin said, as he opened the door and stepped into the hall, not even looking back.
Joey stood there, looking at the door for what seemed like hours. He was hoping that he would wake up, and it would all just be some horrible nightmare. However, that was not to be the case.
Kevin wandered around for what seemed like an eternity, his mind battling within him. 'How could Joey have done this?' He thought, to himself. They had planned to build a life together. How could he just throw it all away, like that? So many thoughts ran through his mind, that is was hard to contain them all.
He sat there for an hour, trying to sort it all out, and failing miserably. He was beginning to lose track of everything around him, until he heard a familiar voice.
"I thought I might find you here." Brian said, from behind him.
"Brian? What are you doing here?" Kevin asked, as he turned to look at him.
"Joey, called and told me what happened." Brian said, looking at his cousin with concern.
"I've lost him, Bri." Kevin said, as his voice began to tremble.
Brian took a seat next to him, patting his leg. Neither of them said anything for a minute or two. They just sat there, looking out at the things around them.
"Kevin, I wanna ask you a question." Brian said, not looking at him.
"Okay," Kevin replied.
"Do you love him?" Brian asked, still not looking in his direction.
"You know I do, Bri." Kevin said, surprised that he would even ask such a thing.
"Then, you want what's best for him, right?" Brian asked, still looking at the scenery around them.
"Of course, I do. I want him to be happy." Kevin said, becoming irritated with Brian's questions.
"Then, let him go, Kev." Brian said, finally turning to look at his cousin.
"What?" Kevin asked, looking at Brian as if he'd completely lost his mind.
"Kevin, I love you. You know that. You also know in your heart that Joey would be better off with JC." Brian said, being blunt about the situation.
"How can you say that?" Kevin asked, his love for Joey blinding his thinking.
"C'mon, Boo. They're going to be together every day, and they love each other. It would be foolish to think that they won't get together eventually." Brian said, bringing reality to the situation.
"How could he do this?" Kevin asked, more to himself.
"How could you fall in love with him?" Brian asked, turning the tables on his cousin.
"It just happened. I didn't mean for it to, it just did." Kevin said, in his defense.
"Exactly, cuz. It just happened with him and JC, too." Brian said, hoping his cousin would understand.
"I know." Kevin said, finally conceding to the fact that he had lost Joey, forever. "It's just that it hurts, man."
"I know. Give it some time, Kev. It will get better." Brian said, putting his hand on Kevin's shoulder.
"I sure hope so." Kevin said, as he stood to his feet.
"It will, trust me." Brian said, throwing his arm around Kevin.
"C'mon, let's get out of here." Kevin said, as they walked toward their cars.
They got in their cars and headed back to the hotel. All the while, Kevin could not get Joey out of his mind. His thoughts were interrupted, as his cell phone began to ring.
"Hello?" Kevin answered, without looking at the ID.
"Kev, please don't hang up." Joey said, on the other end.
"Hi, Joey." Kevin said, his heart reliving the pain of their prior ordeal.
"Kevin, we really need to talk about this." Joey said, hoping he would agree to meet him.
"I know, Joey. I'm on my way back to the hotel, why don't we just meet in my room in about 30 minutes." Kevin said, unsure of himself.
"I can do that." Joey said, relieved that Kevin had at least agreed to see him.
"Okay, I'll see you then." Kevin said, about to end the conversation.
"Okay, and Kev?" Joey said, his emotions showing in his voice.
"Yeah?" Kevin asked, awaiting Joey's voice once again.
"I do love you." Joey said, causing Kevin's heart to catch in his throat, as a tear rolled down his cheek.
"I know. I love you too, Joey." Kevin said, taking him by surprise.
Kevin drove the rest of the way to the hotel, thinking of his conversation with Joey. He knew that Brian had been right all along, but that didn't make it any easier to say good-bye.
When Kevin and Brian arrived at the hotel, Joey was there waiting for them. Brian could see that they wanted to talk, so he told Kevin that he'd see him a little later, and left them alone, as he watched them enter Kevin's room.
"Are you okay?" Joey asked, seeing Kevin's face.
"Yeah, I'm alright." Kevin answered, not able to look at him.
"Kev, I didn't mean to hurt you." Joey said, hoping beyond hope that Kevin could forgive him.
"I know, Joey." Kevin said, surprising himself as much as Joey.
"You do?" Joey asked, in disbelief.
"Well, I didn't, but Bri and me had a long talk. I know what it's like to want to be with the one that you love. You and JC are gonna be together every day. I'd be a fool to think that you and I could last through that." Kevin said, hoping that he was doing the right thing.
I guess, that's what love is all about; wanting what's best for the people that you care about. Kevin knew that he loved Joey enough to let him go, and that's exactly what he did.
"I want you to know, that I will always love you." Joey said, as he stood to leave the room.
"I know you will, Joey. I've never had feelings for anyone the way that I do for you, and whatever happens, down the road, I know that I will always love you, too." Kevin said, giving him a smile for the first time since they began their talk.
"So, I guess this is it." Joey said, as he made his way to the door.
"Yeah, I guess, it is." Kevin said, trying to hold back the emotion that was welling up inside him.
"Kev?" Joey said, looking towards him.
"Yeah," Kevin answered, as he started to look up at Joey.
Before he could say, or do anything, Kevin felt Joey's lips touch his, igniting emotions in him that he tried hard to fight. Just as everything hit him at once, Joey released him.
"Good-bye, Kev," Joey said, looking one last time into those piercing green eyes.
"Good-bye, Joey," Kevin said, placing his palm against Joey's cheek.
Neither of them moved for a minute or so. The just stood there, staring at each other. Although they never spoke, there seemed to be a hidden communication between them. It was as if the end of an era had occurred. Joey stepped backwards into the hallway keeping his eyes on Kevin. In a matter of seconds he was gone, leaving Kevin to stare into the emptiness.
As he closed the door, Kevin felt the tears once again dampen his cheeks. It was as if all the emotions that he had fought so hard against, had suddenly overtaken him. He could not remember ever feeling so much pain in his entire life. Even so, he knew that there would come a time, when he would once again, be happy.
The time had come for Joey, and the rest of the Nsync guys to leave. Kevin turned on his radio, and made his way out to the balcony of his room. In the distance he could see some things being loaded onto a tour bus, belonging to Nsync. His mind wandered back to the first time that he and Joey had confessed their feelings for each other.
As he looked back towards the bus, he noticed that the guys had started to emerge from the building. He watched as they all boarded, except for Joey. Finally, he saw him exit the building and head towards the bus. Just before he reached the bus, Joey looked up to where he thought Kevin's room was located. He couldn't really see him from where he stood, but still, he gave him a wave and a kiss good-bye before he stepped onto the bus.
Kevin once again felt the tears grace his cheeks, as he watched the bus drive to the corner. In the back ground he could hear a familiar tune that caused his heart to ache even more. He sat there watching the bus pull into traffic as he felt a hand on his shoulder. Looking up, he saw his cousin, and best friend standing beside him, with a knowing smile. Kevin smiled back, as the bus rolled out of sight. He could hear the words of the song that was playing on the radio. How appropriate they were for the moment:
Gone is the romance that was so divine, It's broken and cannot be mended You must go your way, and I must go mine, but now that our love dreams have ended
What'll I do, when you are far away, and I am blue, what'll I do What'll I do, when I am wondering who, is kissing you, what'll I do
What'll I do, with just a photograph, to tell my troubles to When I'm alone, with only dreams of you, that won't come true, what'll I do
When I'm alone, with only dreams of you, that won't come true ... what'll I do...
THE END
Okay, guys/gals that's it. Let me know what you think about the story. Send mail to starstories34@yahoo.com Oh yeah, check out my other story 'Me and Joey.' Until next time, Much Luv to Ya!!!