Kasper's Den

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+++++++++++++++++

"Open up my eyes and

Tell me who I am

Let me in on all your secrets

No inhibition, no sin

How deep is your love?"

+{Kasper's Den}+

Part 5

[By Emri]

The next few days were pretty chill. I spent hours talking to Amir while he was back home preparing for his new semester. We learned so much about each other but never seemed ready to say goodbye.

I also went out with Ali, his twin, for a few hours each day to workout so Mr. Hamad and his husband, Emerson, could have their time together. It must have been awkward for them having me sleep in their room each night, but they never complained. Ali had the other room all to himself. Mr. Hamad didn't think it was a good idea for me to sleep in the bed where Amir had been. I don't know why, I don't think I was Ali's type, but I didn't argue.

I spent so much time video-chatting with Amir on Emerson's tablet that Emerson started to show a little anger with his son which was rare for him. He would sign to Amir who would sign back with begging looks like only a child can give to his parents. I missed him every time we had to say goodbye. Finally though, Mr. Hamad took me to get one of my own.

They aren't cheap. My family only had two when I was growing up. One was decent and the other was a cheap knock off my dad had gotten as a prize from some company meeting. I'd never had one of my own though and certainly not one as nice as Emerson's. Mr. Hamad took me to the name brand store at the mall where they'd bought clothes for me. Emerson went with us, but Ali said he had things to do.

"This is the best? He will need it to resist damage. You know how rough young boys can be on things," Mr. Hamad asked the guy in a blue uniform shirt who was helping us. The guy assured us that it would and offered a side warranty that would cover it for life. I wasn't sure why he thought I was so clumsy.

"And what color would you like? He swiped his finger across the touchpad wall and we customized it. I picked out a shimmery green color and they even paid to have my name engraved on the back. We went to lunch and did some shopping while the computer put it together.

When it was ready, we went back to the store. It was beautiful and razor thin. The front touchscreen was made of that new material that's soft with better response to fingers. The back was the beautiful green color I'd picked.

It had the new technology that could instantly find all information about me just from pressing my thumb against it. Mr. Hamad had to do it first since he was the buyer. He also put some parental controls on it so I wouldn't get into dirty stuff. Even though I was 18, he saw me as a small child who needed looking after. He set me as a user and Emerson as a "parent" so it would respond to all of our thumbs.

When I pressed my thumb on there it loaded everything from my life account. It had my passport, documents, messages, social media. It even had family and personal photos taken since birth. Technology is amazing. It reminded me how much I missed my brothers, my parents, friends, and family.

It struck me that they just spent thousands of dollars customizing a tablet for me and now I was pining for home. Emerson and Mr. Hamad let me show them my family and old pictures. I told them all about my life back home. They said I was an adorable little kid. Emerson sent a few of my baby and childhood pictures to himself.

All of that happiness changed though as we headed back to the resort. I slid into the back of their car and went about playing with the tablet. I decided to send a message to my parents and see if they were still upset with me. They always calmed down eventually.

I saw though that my dad had just sent a message this morning. We must have thought about each other at the same time. I opened it and read:

"Kas...

Once again you have reached new depths in shaming our family. How could you do this? Your mother doesn't even want to hear your name. At work, church, anywhere we go people ask what went wrong with you. We are the joke of our community. Your show debuted here and apparently it's trashier than we thought. We can't watch it of course, but we've heard comments from all of our friends and community. Even your brothers now have to bear the ridicule of your sinful, selfish choices.

This time you really went too far. We didn't raise you to flaunt your sexuality for everyone to see. We always tolerated you, but now you insist on publicly shaming us with your lascivious and perverted choices. We've tried everything with you and you only get worse. Now you are shacked up an Arab sheik who is nearly as old as me! He actually tried to shame us for our Christian parenting! No more! You are our biggest disappointment.

That is the life you want and we want no part of it or you. We have to take a stand for what we believe. You are no longer welcome in our home or in our family. We want nothing to do with this. Your brothers, mother, and I are in agreement on this."

That was it. There was no "Goodbye," or "Love, Dad."

I sat stunned in the backseat of their car as the South African landscape rushed by. I had really fucked everything up this time. He'd never said things like that. They always got angry with me and then calmed down and acted like everything was ok, but they'd never said I wasn't a part of my family anymore.

I felt light headed and my stomach started to turn like angry gremlins were squeezing it. I felt my heart pounding in my ears and my breath came in ragged gasps. I doubled over, put my head between my knees and faced the carpet. Then everything went black.

+++

I came to in the dark quiet of the cold master bedroom in the hotel suite. My shoes and pants were gone. The warm comforter was pulled over my shoulders. My head was cradled in the foam pillow lightly fragranced by Mr. Hamad's overly masculine cologne. They'd brought me up and put me down for a nap thinking I'd fallen asleep.

I sat up and felt a cold sweat over my skin. I took off my shirt, wiped my neck and chest. I tossed it over towards the bathroom door and felt my head start to pound like every ounce of blood had rushed out of it.

"Mahhh" I groaned weakly and leaned forward. I felt a pain behind my eyes, a thick dam holding back the tears. The message from my dad... or whatever he was to me now, played on repeat.

"No longer a part of our family... Biggest disappointment" I mumbled to myself again and again.

"What's that, sweet one?" Mr. Hamad's voice called from the other room. The door to the main suite was halfway open.

I shook my head even though he couldn't see me. The door to the room opened wider and a handsome Arab face peeked in on me. It was Ali. He smiled as he looked in on me.

Our eyes locked and I must have looked pitiful because his face got suddenly worried and he called something in Arabic to his father. I heard something drop and then the muscled patriarch lumbered past his son to see what was wrong with me.

"You had a good nap, little one? You don't feel well?" Mr. Hamad said and his eyes said he knew something was very wrong with me. He came quickly to sit by me on the bed. He put the back of his hand to my forehead, checking for a fever. I wondered if that was a universal thing all parents did.

"What's wrong, my son?" He said and put a hand on my bare back. That word sent me over the edge, "Son." My tears broke free and gushed down my cheeks as I threw my arms around his neck and scrambled to get closer. He pulled me in, his protective arms holding me tightly.

"Kasper, what happened? Amir hurt you? Tell me, little one!" He said something to Ali in Arabic. The older of his twins came up behind me on the bed and pressed against me to make a Hamad sandwich.

I shook my head, Amir hadn't hurt me. Ali put his chin on my shoulder like Amir would. He put his arms around me too as my body shook with sadness and ugly crying noises.

"I... I... tablet," I choked out in between sobs.

"You broke the tablet? Don't worry, baby. I'll buy you another one. I'll buy you twenty of them. There is no need to be upset. I was only joking with the warranty. Of course you're not clumsy. I hurt your feelings?" Mr. Hamad asked with desperation. He didn't understand why I was upset.

Ali pulled away from me and I heard him slide the tablet off the bedside table.

"It looks fine, father. See? It works, Kasper. Nothing to be sad about. The tablet is fine," Ali said.

"The... message," I said in between gasps for air as I closed in on hyperventilation.

"Oh shit! These people are..." I heard Ali call as he swiped through my keyboard. "What the fuck? Dad you better see this." He must have opened the message.

"What is it?" Mr. Hamad asked and let go of me. He reached for the tablet and then nudged me back against Ali. Ali had sat behind me so I was pushed back into his lap. He slid his arms around me and put his chin on my shoulder as his father read the message.

"Oh, my," Mr. Hamad said and shook his head in frustration. "And he thinks... He thinks... you and I are in a sexual relationship? What is wrong with them? Who makes them so hateful towards their own child... their own creation?" He shook his head angrily.

"I... messed everything... up! It's all my fault. I should have..." I sobbed as Ali held me tightly, rubbing my chest and breathing against my ear, trying his best to soothe me.

"You are not to blame for this. No, sweet child... That's it. You will have no communication with these people until they go through me. They are dogs! They can't be this vicious to a perfectly good boy. What kind of selfish people put their social life above the basic needs of their own son? Horrible people!" Mr. Hamad was furious. He didn't understand my family wasn't like his.

"They're not bad... They're not dogs... they just..." I didn't know how to defend them.

"Of course, sweet angel. They are your people. I didn't mean to insult them.... But... fuck!" Mr. Hamad swore. I'd never heard him do that. He shook his head and recovered quickly. He pulled me back from Ali's lap. The muscled men passed me around so easily. Ali got a pair of shorts for me and they helped me into them since I only had on briefs.

"Come with me," He said and lifted me up into his chest. I slid my arms around his shoulders and let him lift me. He stood and balanced me on his left arm. He grabbed my tablet with his right hand and carried me away from the warm bed.

Emerson was turned away from us, doing his stretches according to a yoga video playing on his propped-up tablet. He hadn't noticed the commotion or panic. Mr. Hamad carried me over and nudged him with my tablet. Emerson looked up at us and did a double take when he saw my state of distress.

It must have looked odd to see an 18-year-old white boy bare-chested and cradled against the muscles of a tall, handsome Arab man in his late 40's. But he held me protectively as I cried on his shoulder. He didn't care how grown I was or what we looked like. He was a daddy and that's what they do.

Emerson gave me those eyes full of pity and got to his feet. He took the tablet and read the message. He looked at me and leaned in to kiss my cheek. He put his head against his husband's other shoulder and together they tried to calm me.

"Sorry," he said with his voice. I hadn't really heard it before. It sounded like you'd expect from a deaf person. He rubbed my arms. They were prickled with goosebumps from the cold room and the warm body that held me. He leaned into me and put his head on my shoulder, kissed my neck. He held there for a minute and then backed away and signed to his husband. Mr. Hamad paced back and forth as he bounced me like he'd do to a crying child.

"Of course you have a family. You have us," Mr. Hamad translated and then added, "Yes, Kasper. You always have a place with us. We will love and support you like our own children. I know it can't make up for this heartbreak, but we love you so much. You're not a disaster or embarrassment, you never were. You just didn't have the people who would understand what you need. We will be that for you. We want you. You are loved."

Mr. Hamad carried me over to the couch and laid down with me on his chest. He held me and rocked me until I calmed in his arms. I fell asleep again as he rubbed my back and quietly sang some Arabic lullaby his children probably knew well. He was a magician at getting me to fall asleep.

I woke up in their bed again, alone with nobody holding me. I heard voices out in the living room and looked up to see Emerson sitting in bed next to me reading a book on his tablet. He looked down when he felt me stir. He put his hand on my forehead and pushed back my hair. He typed on his tablet that it was dinner time. I hadn't eaten much that day. I should have been hungry, but the day had wiped me out.

I went to take a shower. Emerson laid out a clean blue t-shirt and white shorts with white briefs for me. I dressed and he brushed out my hair then pulled it up into a messy bun. My eyes were still red and sore. We went out to see the dinner buffet of grilled vegetables and roast lamb. Taj was there again. They must have filled him in because he hugged me and echoed Mr. Hamad's curse on my family.

I sat between Taj and Mr. Hamad, both of them trying to feed me like protective parents. I tried to eat some. It was good, but I wasn't that hungry. They both encouraged me to take another bite. I tried to comply. They four of them tried to cheer me up as I sat in stunned quiet.

"You see, Kasper? You have many people who love you who will be in Satra. Taj has accepted a paid position with us. You will have one more friend to welcome you. My family will embrace you as well. I know you will be happy there with us. You will never want for anything, especially love and support," Mr. Hamad said and signed.

"And Amir. I know he misses you. You're all he thinks about," Ali assured. I looked to see that it was his own words and not a translation of something Emerson had signed. He seemed to genuinely address me. He wanted me to feel better.

"Thank you... I have no family, no place to go in my own country... They don't want me... I'm not welcome there. I'm an orphan. I don't know what I would do without you guys," I said quietly.

"You'll never have to find out, little one. We will be there to support you. You're not an orphan. You're a Hamad now," Mr. Hamad kissed my cheek and put his hand on my back.

After dinner I went to talk to Amir. I opened the tablet expecting to see the horrible message from my dad again, but it was gone. Mr. Hamad had deleted it. He knew I would read it over and relive it again and again.

"Kasper, baby, my love bunny. How are you?" Amir asked with a face that told me he'd already been filled in on everything. I just shrugged and shook my head. I didn't want to talk about it. It was like someone had died, a giant piece of me was gone.

Amir nodded. He understood.

"I should be there with you. It hurts me that you're going through this without me. I promise I'll never let anyone hurt you again. When we are together, you will never leave my arms. Father has already set messages from your family to go through him. We don't want you to see more of that. It is so awful. You are the kindest, gentlest boy. Who could say such horrible things to you?" Amir was getting upset.

"I don't want to think about it," I whispered.

"Of course... No more... Ali said you got the new X5! Can I see it?" Amir asked to change the topic.

"Uh what's that?" I was confused.

"The... the tablet, Kasper. It just came out. It's super thin! The camera is so sharp I can see your beauty perfectly! I bet the screen on it's pretty awesome too! Go to the bathroom mirror so I can see it!" Amir said. I got off the bed and took it into the bathroom with me. I held it up to the mirror and used the front and back cameras to show it off to him.

"It's a good one?" I asked as he looked it over. Of course it would be top of the line. The Hamads only bought the best of everything.

"It's perfect, almost as beautiful as my sweet cub. I miss your body so much. I've been hard since we parted just remembering our time together and your sweet little lips. I miss you, baby, My soul aches to hold you." Amir looked up at me from the screen.

"I miss you too. We're going there soon! I think," I smiled for him. He was trying his best to cheer me up. He looked so handsome. It was a welcome distraction.

"I miss that perfect little body... and I'm so horny for my boy's hole... little pink pussy and those nipples! I just want to suck and bite... fuck Kasper. I'm all horned up over here. I need to get in that pussy again. See what you do to me? You make my cock swell bigger than it ever has. You bring out the lion in me and it needs to seed its boy." Amir panned the camera down to his workout shorts that showed a huge lump.

"Fuck," I whispered when it came into view. He gripped the bulge and wagged it at me.

"Let me see your little pussy, just pull your shorts down for me, baby," Amir growled.

"I can't! Your parents and everybody are right outside. We'd get caught. I don't want to get in trouble again," I countered though my resolve was weakened.

"Please, baby. I need it. You can't deny me heaven. I'm dying over here. Look how full these balls are," Amir slid down the waistband of his shorts and his cock flopped out, big and angry. He gripped his nuts and pulled them up to show me.

"I don't know. What if we get caught?" I asked.

"I have to get off soon or they'll hurt. They get so full just thinking about that little pink boy hole my baby has for me," Amir said as though he had a serious medical need.

I set the tablet against the mirror and turned around. I slowly slid down the back of my shorts and briefs. I looked behind to see him lean in and his lips purse in focused anticipation.

"Fuck, Kasper. You see what you do to me? Spread your cheeks, let me look at my prize," he ordered. He leaned back and grabbed his cock and pumped it as he watched. I arched my back and pushed out my ass. I spread my cheeks and rubbed a finger over my hole. I was instantly hit by the waves of pleasure my hole anticipated when it heard his voice. But he wasn't there to soothe its need.

"Oh fuck yeah baby. It's so beautiful. Perfect little flower. I love seeing my ring on your finger. The ring I marked you with as my own. My name in gold right next to my prize in pink. My beautiful baby... Makes me so hard, my love. Rub it for me. Rub it for your man," Amir lowered his voice. I looked over to check that the door was still closed. I wondered how well the lock worked on it.

"Uhhh," I gasped as I pushed my finger in for him. He was jerking his cock frantically and slid up his shirt to rub his hand over his perfect abs. I loved to see them. He was a man, hard and chiseled without an ounce of youthful imperfections.

"Fuck I'm so... Uhhhh!" He grunted and fisted his cock. "Fuck yourself with that little finger. Open for me, Kasper." He ordered. I pushed the finger inside my hole. I gasped again. I hoped no one would hear us. I tried to muffle it, but even from a thousand miles away he made me feel like the sexiest boy on earth. I'd do anything he wanted.

"I'm gonna cum," He groaned and then white hot shots flew up and hit against his shirt. Little spots appeared as his body bucked and twisted. His face went red and his eyes locked on me.

"Fuck baby! Yes!" Amir growled in a quiet voice as he came. "Fuck!" He shot five or six more volleys and then collapsed back into the chair to recover. He breathed deeply and then took off his shirt to mop up his cum. He wiped his fingers and stomach then rubbed his still hard tool. I pulled my shorts back up. I was rock hard, but didn't want to get caught. I'd wait for him, until I could be with him again.

"I love you so much, Kasper. Please tell me you'll come to me, live in my home with my family. You will always be happy in my home... Please promise me," Amir said as he finished cleaning himself. He stood from the chair and tucked his cock away. It was still hard and straining the shorts. He went over to a dresser and got a fresh t-shirt to put on.

"I will. It's the only choice I have and... you're there. I don't want to be without you anymore. I need you." I traced a finger down the side of the tablet.

"It's the best home you have and filled with the people who would do anything just to make you smile, sweet one... And... you need me... and I need you," Amir said.

I washed my hands and brushed my teeth while he did the same. We got into our beds and then Mr. Hamad came in and said it was bedtime. I said goodnight to Amir. He wished me sweet dreams and again lamented that he wasn't there to comfort and hold me. He promised we would have many days ahead of us for that. I laid there in the dark, quiet room and the bad feeling started to come back.

I was alone with my thoughts and they quickly turned against me.

I wasn't ready to be alone. I thought about calling my dad. Maybe he'd regret what he wrote. He was probably just upset with the situation. I felt awful that everyone was being ridiculed for the show I'd gone on. I should have known better. I hurt them all. I hoped they'd forgive me someday. I would try to lay low with the Hamads until everyone forgot about the stupid show. I'd go back home and they'd act like none of it ever happened.

Maybe if I called my dad or wrote him back and said I was ready to go to college and take classes. Maybe if I said I would like to learn the family business and help out. Maybe I could learn to like fixing sewers and plumbing problems. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad and then he'd welcome me and be proud of me.

Dad wasn't all that bad. Sure he said a lot of stuff when he was angry, but he always calmed down and things went back to normal. Lots of parents were like them and some of my friends had it worse than I did. Dad made a lot of noise, but he never hit us or denied us dinner or anything crazy like that. He just flies off the handle and then calms down. It's especially bad when mom gets upset. If we piss her off then he really loses it. That's probably what happened.

I thought about calling Amir back on the tablet, but I tried to just tough it out rather than disobey Mr. Hamad. Finally though, Emerson and Mr. H. came in to get ready for bed. I sat up and pushed up my sleeping mask. They froze and looked at me. I just shook my head. It wasn't going well for me. Sleep wasn't happening.

"Ok, it's ok Kasper. Go get into our bed. We'll be there soon," Mr. Hamad sighed. He and Emerson went to shower and I got into the big bed and waited for them. There was something deeply comforting about hearing them together in the bathroom. The rush of the shower, the buzz of their electric toothbrushes, the smack of their kisses, the gargling of mouthwash and towels sliding against skin... The little coughs and laughs, the din of a couple going through their nightly routine. It felt comforting to know that kind of love existed.

+++

"Today? For reals?" I asked with excitement as the four of us had breakfast around the dining table in the suite.

"Yes Kasper, we will leave in a few hours." Mr. Hamad sipped his black tea and checked work messages on his phone without looking up.

"Finally! I'm over this place," Ali said as he munched on his breakfast plate.

"I have to pack. You bought me so many clothes. I don't even have a bag for them! And Taj! I have to say goodbye to him!" I set down my fork and started thinking about all the things I would need to do.

"Finish your breakfast. You've hardly eaten this week and you're losing weight. You don't need to lose weight. You're already so small, Kasper." Mr. Hamad set down his phone and nudged my plate towards me.

"Yes sir," I said and worked through the small pile of eggs and toast. I ate it all, even the cup of fruit and yogurt with granola. I gulped down my green tea and waited for Mr. Hamad to finish. No one left the table with them until Mr. Hamad excused them. It was an unspoken rule in this family. I was learning them. I bounced my leg with nervous energy and waited for his signal.

"Kasper, don't get so worked up. The resort staff will be here shortly to pack everything. They'll bring the luggage Emi purchased for you. The jet will take us home when we are ready. There is nothing to worry about. I know Amir is anxious to have you back. We will be there in good time," Mr. Hamad assured as he laughed at my energetic frenzy.

The staff showed up just as Mr. Hamad was finishing his last bite of breakfast. It was my turn to set the dishes outside the suite. Ali was grateful that I was included in the chores. I stacked up the plates and the silver lids. I put everything nicely on the tray and then carried it over to the door. Mr. Hamad opened it for me and I set it down in the hall. There was a service worker there dusting a marble table in the hallway. He came to take the tray as soon as I set it down.

The packers put all our things into the bags as Emerson directed them. Everything was folded with perfect corners, the suits were hung in elaborate bags. Everything would make it to Satra in peak condition. I followed Emerson around pretending to help as he directed. He caught on to me though and sent me to brush my teeth so they could pack up the bathroom.

It was so sad seeing everything by the door waiting for the guy with the cart who would take it to a truck for delivery to the jet. I sat on the floor and looked around the suite. It had been a home and now it looked like any other luxury suite, not that I'd ever seen another one.

"I can't believe we're leaving... this feels like home," I said, realizing that I'd only been here for ten days. But still, my world had been rocked, this was home.

"Kasper, you're sad about the room?" Mr. Hamad asked incredulously. He came over to squat next to where I sat on the floor holding my tablet. He looked like he wanted to laugh, but also didn't want to offend me.

"Oh, sweet boy. This is nothing. You will love our family compound. You will have a room of your own in our house. I added on a room a few years back for a home office. The staff has already moved my things into another room and turned it into a bedroom for you. You will love it. I promise. Don't be sad for this, my heart." Mr. Hamad put his hands under my armpits and lifted me up to my knees so he could hug me against his chest. I knelt between his legs and buried my face into his shoulder. He laughed at my sentimental side.

"This is not your home, Kasper. Your home is waiting for you in our kingdom. Amir is waiting for you as well," Mr. Hamad whispered to me. He helped me up to my feet and kept his arm around my shoulder, his hand pressed against my chest as the man came to load our things.

We said goodbye to the suite. Ali handed me a backpack to put my tablet in. I found it was already packed with my toothbrush, snack bars, and other things Emerson thought I might want on the plane. He was a very thoughtful dad. Mr. Hamad let me pick out a small blanket from the gift shop with the resort name on it for a souvenir and nap on the jet.

As we were leaving, Ali handed me a zip-up hoodie. He said it was Amir's, but they both had one in the same color so Amir left it behind. I wasn't cold, but I put it on to feel a part of him. It still smelled a little like his cologne though I may have imagined it. I wouldn't take it off until I got back to him.

At the airport we drove the rental Mercedes right up to the waiting jet. I'd never been in one before. The workers were finishing up loading our luggage into it so we went aboard to get settled.

There was a desk area near the door and then behind that was a small living room set up with seats along the sides. There were no dividers between the seats so they made two small couches with seat belts. Behind that was a table with chairs and then a hallway that held a kitchen and connected to the bathroom.

Emerson seemed at home on the jet. He directed Ali to secure our carry-ons into overhead bins and then went to get bottles of water for us. Mr. Hamad talked to the flight crew and Ali put in his headphones and settled into a seat. When it was time to take off, we all sat down and buckled in. I was next to Ali with Mr. Hamad and Emerson across from us.

A steward guy was with us in the cabin. He was small, but handsome, maybe a year or two older than Ali. He had on a crisp white button up shirt, blue tie, and blue vest with black pants. He handed me a straw for the bottle of water. Mr. Hamad said that sipping it during take off would help my ears with the pressure change. The steward was the last to buckle in using one of the chairs in the dining area.

The take-off was crazy. The big airplane that brought me here from LA was pretty smooth, but the small jet put up a little fight as we zoomed down the runway and then lifted up into the skies. I looked nervously at Ali and he reached to take my hand. I leaned against him and he put his arm around me. I looked over to see Mr. Hamad studying me. I couldn't tell what the look on his face meant. He seemed to regard the way Ali and I were sitting, but I didn't know if he approved or not. I met his eyes for a moment but then looked away.

It went remarkably fast and soon we were up high and zooming over Africa towards Satra. The steward guy was up and moving around. He brought down a panel from the ceiling that turned out to be a movie screen. Mr. Hamad went to a back table and setup his laptop to get some work done. The steward went about pulling down the shades on the windows and a projection system brought up a menu on the screen.

Ali picked out an action film and put on the subtitles for Emerson who was stretching out on the other couch. Ali turned towards me so he could face the projection screen. He laid back and slid towards me so he could stretch out. He grabbed the pillow behind me and put it on his chest then patted it like he wanted me to lay my head against him. I didn't know what Amir would think of that so I stayed sitting up. He just shrugged as the movie started.

The more we got into the movie, the more Ali spread out until he had one foot propped up behind me on the seat back and one foot on the floor next to mine, his legs spread wide. He'd taken off his shoes and had his arms folded behind his head. I stayed in my upright position, not about to cuddle with my boyfriend's brother. Boyfriend? That word had never occurred to me. I guess that's what we were. I'd see what Amir thought. I looked back in the plane and saw Mr. Hamad was typing away on his laptop and across from us Emerson was half-asleep hugging his pillow.

Ali kept "accidentally" kicking my feet with the right one he had planted on the ground. Some explosion or gunfire would happen in the movie and he'd jolt and push on me with his right foot or his hands. He was being playful since I didn't want to lie down on his chest.

Things had changed between us over the last week. With Amir gone, Ali had taken me with him to the gym sometimes or out for a walk so the two Mr. Hamads could have some alone time. He'd warmed up to me a little as we talked and joked, but he still kept me at a distance. I was his brother's boy and not in his area of interest.

Then when I got that message from my dad and he read it and saw how upset I was, tried to comfort me. It changed things dramatically between us. He became more of a protective big brother with me. I wondered about him; what kind of guys he liked, if he was into more versatile guys like Amir was or did he want to be the alpha, was he getting close to me in order to protect his brother's interests while he was away? I knew so little about him. He was a closed book.

I got up to stretch and go pee. I came back and decided to get the blanket out of my backpack. The jet was cold and dark. I was getting sleepy and wanted to find a place to nap. I took the blanket and went behind Ali so I wouldn't block his movie as I unfolded it. I noticed him look back to see what I was doing. I turned my back to him and watched Mr. Hamad typing away at his keyboard. The older man stopped and met my eyes as if wondering what I needed. I just shook my head with a happy smile as a yawn escaped me.

"You're tired, little one? Ali can open the couch for you," Mr. Hamad said.

"Here, Kasper," Ali said. He stood and pushed a button on the side panel. The seat bottoms slid out and seat backs laid flat. It was like a really expensive futon. I slipped off my shoes. The steward came over to us carrying pillows and linens. He spread a velvet covering over the seat. It had elastic edges and was made to fit the seat perfectly like a thick sheet. He laid out a flat sheet on top of that and then a thin blanket.

Ali pulled up the blanket and I slid in. I laid down on the side next to the window. Ali laid next to me on his back and un-paused the movie. I turned on my side, facing him, to watch the movie and hug the pillow. I watched his chest rise and fall as he focused on the movie with his arms folded behind his head. I saw subtle differences between him and his twin brother.

Amir was a few minutes younger, but he was more serious than his older brother. Ali was more playful, less focused on the future. Amir talked about his studies, what he wanted to accomplish in his father's business. Ali liked to hang out in the background more, only emerging when Emerson needed translation or needed something moved, carried, stowed.

Even Mr. Hamad seemed to regard the boys with slight differences. He let Ali be more independent. It's not that he expected less of his eldest twin, and maybe I didn't really understand their relationship at all, but he seemed to treat him with a more hands-off approach than Amir. For his part, Emerson always showered both of his sons with endless affection and praise. They did the same for him. They never passed their dad without touching his shoulder, squeezing his hand, putting their heads on his shoulder, or offering to carry whatever Emerson held.

I was thinking about all this when I realized I had been staring at Ali's face. He noticed, but didn't seem to mind. He had turned towards me and our eyes locked. There was an intensity to his look that told me I needed to get back to Amir soon. His lips curled into a smile. He mouthed "Ok?" with questioning eyes. I closed my eyes and pretended to sleep. I felt his hand touch my cheek, his fingers run through my hair. I hadn't put it up that day, just brushed it straight.

I felt his body turn away from me and back to the movie. He was making the right choice, loyalty to his brother. I turned away from him too, towards the window with the opaque shade pulled down. I pulled the blanket over my head. It made a dark little pocket for me and I could nap.

The rest of the flight went smoothly. I did a yoga workout with Emerson and then we all had a late lunch.

After we ate, Emerson got his tablet and pulled me over to sit with him to have "A talk." It seemed serious.

He told me about when he was a kid and grew up without parents. He bounced around a few foster homes but never got a real family until he met Ali.

"I had a lot of feelings I had buried deep, Kasper. I only realized them when I got far into my yoga studies. I had held onto them for so long that they felt normal. When I uncovered them I found a lot of anger, sadness. It was just after we had the twins and the stress pushed me into a really bad place. I even tried to leave them. I thought I didn't deserve all this..." Emerson typed.

"Woah," I said. Ali Jr. was listening to something on his phone and Mr. Hamad was into his work. I couldn't imagine him leaving them and Amir.

"Rejection is the worst emotion, especially from the people who are supposed to be your strongest foundation. You shouldn't even have to question their support. It does horrible damage that might not even fully show up for years. Luckily I had Ali Sr., Mr. Hamad to you, who realized I needed help and looked out for me. He loves me more than I ever knew." Emerson looked up and watched his husband with adoration.

I didn't know what to say to that.

"We want you to have someone to talk to while you stay with us. There's a psychiatrist that specializes in this. Ali brought him to work in the kingdom long ago when I needed support. He stayed and fell in love with a Satran man. He's the best in the world. We both want you to spend time with him while you are here. To help sort out your feelings. Are you up for that?" Emerson wrote.

"I guess so. Does he know English?" I wasn't sure about this but he seemed like it was important.

"Of course!" Emerson laughed.

+++

The sun was just beginning to set when Mr. Hamad pulled me over to the window to see his kingdom.

"The university where Amir and Ali attend, the new energy tower built by the Chinese, my family's office tower," Mr. Hamad pointed at the sites as we did a loop around the city. He finally pointed towards a long runway and gleaming glass terminal building to show me the Satra Airport. We packed away the things we'd used on the trip. I folded the new blanket neatly.

"It's beautiful!" I said and looked out over the desert landscape. We buckled in and the jet made a perfectly soft landing on a side runway. He took us over to a private hangar just as the sun was going down behind it.

We came to a stop and the steward went to open the door and let down the folding stairs. As soon as he did that I heard a rumble of feet bounding up them. Amir's face peeked in and then he rushed me, pulled me to his chest, and hugged me tightly.

"Baby," he cooed against my ear as he pressed the air out of me. It was a warm night and he wore a simple black tank top and small grey shorts with matching nikes. His black hair was spiked up with gel and his wide, deep eyes looked at me full of emotion as he pulled away to see me.

I saw Mr. Hamad eye us with approval. Amir went to hug the rest of his family but I held onto the back of his shirt. He took my backpack and then noticed the hoodie I had on.

"Hey! This is mine? I left it?" he asked. I nodded. "Wait, what happened to the drawstring?" He laughed and pointed to the string on the right side of the hoodie.

"He sucked on it while he slept... and when we took off... and landed... I guess your boy likes his pacifier," Ali laughed as we walked to the car.

"Oh! I'm sorry. I didn't realize I was doing that." I told them I had a bad habit of chewing on the strings unconsciously when I was anxious. I'd done it since I was very young. My mom always got mad at me and said it was a bad habit like sucking my thumb. I guess I hadn't gotten over it.

"Actually, Kasper, Ali used to chew on the neckline of his t-shirts until he was... 4? 5?" Mr. Hamad asked Emerson who held up four fingers and laughed. Ali's face turned angry and embarrassed. Mr. Hamad put his arm around his son with a smug smile.

"Yeah but I'm 18 not 4... I'm sorry, Amir," I said, but he just squeezed my hand and smiled.

"That is truly fucking adorable, Kasper. You seriously chewed on my clothes?" He laughed then added, "You can chew on anything of mine you want... Well almost anything."

"Amir!" Mr. Hamad lightly scolded his dirty joke. Amir apologized halfheartedly. He led us to an oversized black SUV with a short, wide license plate that had Arabic script on it. He handed his father the keypad and led me to the backseat. Amir put me in the center and slid in next to me. Ali got in on my other side and leaned against the window with tired eyes.

"I can't wait for you to meet everyone and see your new room. I helped fix it up for you!" Amir said excitedly as Mr. Hamad drove us through the city. It was dark outside the window and Amir kept me under his arm. I laid against his chest and it calmed the craziness of the last few days. My body knew it was safe with him, he felt like family.

He kept talking, but I just laid my head against his chest and smelled his cologne, sweat, excitement. I lost track of everything when he held me. I put my lips to the neckline of his tank top that plunged between his hard pecs. I lipped at his shirt then rubbed my nose along his sternum, dark firm skin with a dusting of chest hair. His arm around me pulled me in closer. I felt his nose explore my hair and his lips find my forehead.

"I missed you so much," I whispered to him as Mr. Hamad turned the radio to some weird Arab music. I looked up at his eyes, serious and lost in thought. He nodded.

"I missed you more... so much more," he said without a hint of sappy inflection.

The car climbed up a windy road into the hills and then we found a large gate that slid open as Mr. Hamad neared it. He took us around a long, tiled driveway and into a giant five car garage.

Amir slung my backpack over his shoulder and we made our way inside the mansion so I could meet everyone. I held Amir's hand and walked a little behind him. I get nervous with new people and impressing his family meant everything to me.

We encountered an older man in the front entry. He was a little shorter than Mr. Hamad and had grey hair but the same features. He wore a button-up shirt and black pants. Mr. Hamad went directly to him and they hugged for a long time.

"That's my grandfather, Doctor Hamad," Amir whispered. Everyone hugged him and then Amir introduced me. He looked at me with kind eyes and welcomed me to his home. I didn't know what to call him so I just stuck with doctor. He hugged me and said it was very nice to meet him.

With all the noise our arrival made, we attracted the rest of the family.

I met Amir's uncle Samir and his husband named Lincoln. They were an interesting couple. Where Mr. Hamad and Emerson could be described as opposites, a big hunky Arab and his small petite cub, Samir and Lincoln were more closely matched. They were roughly the same height and both had strong, muscular frames. From what Amir had told me about them Samir was 40 and Lincoln was in his early 30's.

They both hugged everyone and eventually made their way to me. When Amir introduced me, his Uncle Lincoln shook my hand and pulled me in for one of those quick "bro hugs." It's almost like a chest bump but with an arm across my shoulder and a pat on the back. He wasn't interested. His husband though was intrigued. He looked me up and down while Lincoln hugged me. He nodded approval to Amir.

"I am so glad you decided to come. Amir has talked about you all week," Samir said. "If you hadn't come home with his family, he would likely have thrown himself into the river!"

Samir came to hug me. He had the strong arms of Mr. Hamad, and I felt his nose brush my neck as he inhaled. He patted my hair and pulled away.

When he pulled away, I saw two boys had appeared behind them. They ran quickly to Mr. Hamad and started working their way through the gauntlet of family hugs and those nose rubs they did in this culture. I guess the Hamads had been away for a few weeks.

I recognized the boys as Samir and Lincoln's children. Amir had shown me them in the pictures. The older one was named Badir, their old word for "moonlight." He was 11 and had the darker coloring and presence of Samir. The younger one was lighter and looked like a boyish version of Lincoln. He had sparkling green eyes and a wide Arab nose. His name was Zane, a form of the English name "John," Lincoln's father's name.

As Samir backed away from me, his youngest returned to him and eyed me with suspicion.

"He's shy. I don't know where he gets it from," Samir noted as he lifted the 6 year old into his arms and the child hid his face from me in his father's chest. Lincoln tried to introduce the boys to me, but they both looked disinterested.

"You're from LA? Why do they always choose boys from SoCal?" Lincoln laughed and then added, "I'm from there too, a small town up near the Grapevine. We're going back for a visit soon if you get homesick."

"I've been up there. My parents took us camping on Pyramid Lake last summer! I'm from Simi," I noted. Lincoln was trying his best to be polite, but Badir tugged at his arm and said they were almost finished with their movie. We'd interrupted their family time.

"We'd better get back to the movie. They've already seen it five times. Let me know if you need anything. Things here are different from California. I'll give you some tips tomorrow," Lincoln assured. The four of them excused themselves for the evening.

"They already ate dinner early with their boys," Amir explained. We followed Mr. Hamad through the house . Every room we went through was decorated like a palace. I think we passed through three living rooms and a large formal dining room that was being set up for dinner. We went across a courtyard to a smaller building of glass and steel. Mr. Hamad said it was their home with the boys. He touched a keypad and a wall slid open to reveal the entrance.

We entered into a large living room with a very different style than the main house. It looked like a family room actually suited to a family. It was show-room clean and organized, but it was comfortable and functional. A large L-shaped white leather couch wrapped around a long coffee table that held a few magazines and a remote control. It faced the wall that held a huge television screen and a few built in cabinet doors that likely contained entertainment electronics.

Behind the couch was a step up in the concrete floor that led to the kitchen and dining areas. There was a high table with six chairs where I imagined they ate dinner while talking happily about their days. Everything was open and designed to encourage together-time. I thought it must have been designed for Emerson to see everyone and know his boys were alright.

"This way," Amir said excitedly. "You have to see your room!"

Two of the house staff men came out from a side hallway. They must have been delivering our luggage. I followed Amir towards the hallway and we paused at a large set of double doors.

"Woah, this is mine?" I asked and squeezed his hands.

"Uh no, this is my parents' room. Your room connects through their bedroom and through the guest bathroom. It was supposed to be father's office. Don't worry, you will come and go through the bathroom. I just don't want to take you through there your first time seeing it!" Amir explained.

A normal person would have probably felt uneasy at that, but knowing they would be close put me at ease. Mr. Hamad came up behind me then and put his hand on my shoulder. It reminded me that I did have parents, even if they weren't the ones who had raised me. Amir pushed open their door.

Their room was bigger than the one in the hotel suite. They had a King sized bed in the center with a couch in front of it that faced a large television built into the wall. Past that was a huge half circle area surrounded by windows. It had an empty space on the floor where I imagined Emerson set up his yoga mat. The wall to the right was covered in family photos. When Amir led me in, I paused to look at them. They had been all around the world over the years. There were pictures of the boys at various ages posed with their parents in front of every wonder the world held. The Eiffel tower, the Great Wall of China, other places that I couldn't identify; they had seen it all.

"Come on!" Amir prodded as he pulled me along. The rest of the family followed behind us to see what Amir had created. He took me through the room to a side door near Emerson's yoga area. He opened it to a small room that was just for me.

"Oh wow!" I said when we walked in. The walls were painted a deep blue and the ceiling had clouds that looked almost three dimensional. The back wall was one giant window that looked out over a small waterfall and pond with lush trees. It was lit by lights in the cement steps that went around the pond. Along the other wall was a small twin bed made up with a grey down comforter and square pillows.

The real surprise was the photos on the wall. He'd printed and framed pictures from my childhood and the pictures he'd taken of us together. They were on thick canvases and hung in rows along the walls. His handsome face and caring eyes stared at me from various poses. There was another door, one that lead to the guest bathroom. Next to it was a large white wardrobe with mirrored doors. Amir opened it to show me hanging clothes for me that Emerson had ordered and drawers filled with briefs, socks, and pajamas in my size. Under the hanging clothes was five pairs of new shoes for me.

"You did all this for me?" I asked with disbelief. No one had ever done anything remotely close.

"Of course! This is your home. You're my boy and I love you. I want you to be happy here," he said in front of his family. He faced me and put his arms around me. He drew me in for a kiss.

I started crying at the overwhelming emotions. I'm not a crier. I swear.

"Thank you," I said and put my face into the side of his neck. "I love you too."

I looked over Amir's shoulder and saw Mr. Hamad holding Emerson with the smaller man's back against the older man's chest. They watched us with smiles. They were happy for their son... sons. They seemed pleased that we'd found each other. Ali looked around my room and then flopped down on my bed. He seemed bored but content. No one was holding him there.

"You have to see it in the dark!" Amir said and went to the light switch. He turned off the lights and the ceiling glowed green with cursive letters.

"You are loved," I read the script written in a soft glow surrounded by a heart. It was so beautiful, something to fall asleep looking at.

"It's so perfect, Amir. I can't believe you did all this for me," I was overwhelmed by his love.

"You deserve it. My boy gets the best," Amir assured and kissed me.

"Let's get some food and then this one needs to get ready for bed," Mr. Hamad said after allowing us a few minutes of embrace. Amir nodded and let me go but quickly took my hand in his as we made our way through the guest bathroom and out towards the dining area.

We ate dinner around the table in their home. Dr. Hamad came to join us though he didn't eat. There were four pizzas laid out in the center of the table. I thought they were pizzas which seemed weird because they never ate carbs. They turned out to be this flat protein bread topped with hummus and vegetables. I was leery of it but Amir assured me it was delicious. I wasn't very hungry but it was pretty good. I ate two thin slices.

After dinner, Amir took me to see his room. Mr. Hamad said we could have an hour. He looked like he knew how we would spend it. He eyed us uncomfortably. It was super awkward. I felt like we were asking for permission to go violate each other. He nodded towards the hallway to tell us we could go and then echoed his time limit, "One hour then bed for Kasper."

We barely made it down the hallway before I felt his hand on my ass and his lips on my neck. He pushed open the door to his room. I hadn't been in there before, but I barely had a chance to see it before his lips found mine and his hands pulled me into him. He pushed me up against his door and held me tightly as our lips wrestled and his tongue slid into me. I melted in his arms, released the pent up longing for him.

"Wait, are you sure about this? You don't want to talk? I feel like we should talk first. You've been through a something devastating... but I need you so badly... but I also love you and want to make you feel better," Amir tossed through emotions.

"No... can't," I said through kisses down his neck while I inhaled his musk of cologne and sweat. I missed that smell. "If I talk... I'll cry... If I cry... I'll look all ugly... If I look ugly... You won't..."

"No way," he interrupted. "I'll always want you. You could never look ugly to me. I'm here for you, Kas... whatever you need. If you want to cry then I'll hold you until you're better. You're my boy, Kasper. I'll always want to hold you."

"Please... just fuck me," I begged. I wasn't ready to deal with that mountain just yet. I wanted to forget it all and just be his tonight.

"Ok," Amir said and backed away from me. He looked a little unsure, but he wanted to make me happy. He took my hand and led me through his room. It was a boy's room, filled with soccer trophies, pictures of all his adventures, mementos of a childhood he'd always remember fondly. The walls were the same dark blue he'd chosen for the room they'd set up for me. One wall was floor to ceiling windows with heavy blue drapes closed tightly.

He gripped my hand and led me into a bathroom with walls of white granite with flecks of sparkling gold glitter. He turned on the water in the bathtub and added some powder from a glass jar that made the water turn blue with bubbles and a jasmine scent.

"I want to take a bath with you. I've never done that with a guy. I just want to relax with you between my legs." Amir said as he squatted next to the tub and put his hand in to check the water. The tub started to steam and the scent of the bubble bath filled the room.

"I got music and everything," he said with an accomplished grin. He hit something on his phone and soft Arab music came from some unseen speakers. He turned off the bathroom light and then turned on these two glass boxes atop his bathroom vanity that glowed with soft lights. He had technolgy I'd never seen before. It was just enough light for us to see each other, explore each other as we fumbled with our clothes.

"This is so romantic," I noted as I slipped off my shirt and stepped out of my shoes. I watched as he tossed his tank top into a hamper in the corner. He took my shirt from me and threw it to join his. We ditched our clothes and then he put a hand in the center of my back to draw me into him. We held each other and danced to the soft music like we were at some kind of naked Arabian high school prom.

He stared into my eyes as we swayed to the slow song, our cocks rock hard and pressed together. It was surreal. I never could have imagined being here, with someone like him, in someplace like this, on some random Tuesday night in August.

"Ay huh yay yay huh huh yahhh," I sang to the song as if I knew the words. Amir burst out laughing.

"What is that? What are you doing?" he giggled.

"The song... I like it," I said and put my lips on his bare shoulder.

"Is that what we sound like to you?" Amir laughed with an incredulous look.

"I don't know... It just sounds like that to me," I said, fearing I'd insulted his culture.

"I never get over how adorable you are!" Amir exclaimed and kissed my forehead repeatedly.

"The singer is saying, `Look my love... I waited for you for so long... I waited until you loved me back... It was worth it all... I'd have waited for eternity...'" Amir paused to listen and then translated each line as he kissed his way down my neck, across my shoulder.

"And what did I say?" I asked as though I'd really attempted Arabic.

"You said some crazy gibberish and mocked my culture. Not very romantic, but very cute as always," Amir laughed. He stopped to turn off the water in the tub and then went to get in. He sat down and then spread his legs and reached for me.

I went to him and stepped into the hot water. I sat between his legs and laid my back against his chest. He put his arms around me and I his lips on my neck. He rubbed my chest, twisted my nipples, explored me.

"You feel so good, Kasper," Amir breathed against my ear as he rubbed his nose in my hair. He took his phone from the side of the tub and held it up to snap some pictures of us from the chest up. We were bare-chested with just my nipples in the bottom of the frame.

"Don't post that!" I told him with a giggle.

"I won't, but I want to remember everything with you. Everything we do feels like the first time," he said and kissed my cheek as he snapped another one.

"You mean you've done this before?" I asked. I'd never taken a bath with a guy. Ever.

"Just... well... I mean..." Amir fumbled and confirmed that he'd had experience with others.

"Were they cuter than me?" I asked, not ready for the answer. He set down his phone and put his hands on my shoulders, massaging them as his thumbs pressed into the back of my neck.

"No way, not possible. You're the most beautiful boy I've ever know," Amir assured. I closed my eyes and laid back against him as the bubbles popped around us. The relaxing bath and the hard muscles that cradled me had me rock hard.

"And none had this perfect little pussy that begs for my attention," Amir bit my ear playfully and rubbed his hand down between my thighs. His finger found my hole and he began to wiggle it inside me as his other hand gripped my cock and stroked it slowly.

"It needs you... please," I whimpered in his arms. I put my hands on his strong, hairy thighs and squeezed them as he teased my hole.

"You're my everything, sweet one... so perfect," he assured and wiggled his finger deeper inside me. It touched the spot that made my cock thump every time he rubbed it.

"Uh huhhh," I hissed as he hit my special place and rubbed over it with authority. My body pulsed with moans and grunts as he dug deep inside me, showed me things I didn't know I could feel inside.

"You feel so good in there, it makes me so hard. Get on your knees, baby. Let me see that boy hole," Amir said and slid his finger out of me. He put his hands on my cheeks and guided me up to my knees.

"You want this hole? You ready for it?" I asked as I spread my legs and leaned forward to put my hands on the cold tile.

"Almost!" He jumped out of the tub quickly and brought back a small bottle.

"What's that?" I nodded at the bottle.

"This is the good stuff, the best for my baby. It's specially made for tight holes and beautiful boys. See? It says so right here on the bottle." Amir noted as he brought back the bottle. He showed it to me but of course the label was in Arabic so I'd have to take his word for it. He got back in behind me and sat back down. He rubbed my ass and spread it to get to his prize.

"Fuck that's beautiful. That tight little hole. I can't wait to breed my boy," Amir said and leaned forward. I felt his lips kiss my hole and I looked back to see his face buried between my cheeks. I reached back and put my fingers in his hair. I gripped it like he did to mine sometimes. I pushed him against me and felt his tongue slide in.

"Uhhh that feels so... fuck... yes... uhhh," I groaned as he expertly licked me and opened me up for him. I wanted him inside me so badly. He slid his finger in next to his tongue and elicited a loud moan from deep inside me as my lips formed a big "O" and gasped.

"You like that? Baby?" Amir said as he took his tongue and fingers out of me. He slicked up two fingers then and slid back inside me. I was hit by a warming sensation that made me feel tingly down there. I pushed back on his fingers, fucking myself as my body gave deep shivers and little whines. It felt incredible.

"Fuck me, please," I lowered my head and begged as my breath came in ragged gasps and I pushed him deeper inside me. I fucked myself on his fingers as my cock flopped and banged against my tummy. My body pulsed as little shocks of pleasure spread through every inch of me.

"You want me inside you, want my seed to fill that little hole?" Amir asked as though I wasn't literally on my knees begging him.

"Please, Yes... fuck," I felt myself on the edge as he slid a third finger inside me. I felt so full, but so safe, warm, connected, loved at his touch. I needed more of it. It made my eyes snap shut and my face screw up at the overwhelming pleasure bursting inside me.

"You're so fucking tight, baby. Definitely not made for an Arab man. We better go slow," Amir warned as I pushed back on his fingers. He leaned down and kissed the center of my back.

"I can take it. C'mon. Fuck me harder," I whined. I was so desperate for him. I looked back to give him my best pleading eyes and started to bounce on his fingers. He drizzled more lube on my hole and then began to ram me. He twisted and stretched his fingers to open my hole for him. My cock was riding the edge for the longest time as he rubbed over the happiest parts of me.

"Ok, but... slowly... I can't risk hurting the most perfect hole," Amir said with a serious tone.

"Fuck... fuck... fuck," I gasped as he plowed my field with his fingers. I looked back to see him watching me, eyes studying me as he stroked his cock. He looked like a man, a real man, strong and mature. His eyes were heavy with the responsibility of what apparently was a dangerous cock.

Amir slid his fingers out and got up on his knees behind me, between my legs. He leaned over me and wrapped his arms around me, held me against his chest. He kissed up the back of my neck, slurping his tongue along my skin. His lips worked their way over my cheek until they met mine. We kissed as he rubbed his cock back and forth over my hole, humping against my ass.

"Are you sure?" he asked though his tone said he needed it as badly as I did.

"Pound me!" I growled in my best impression of his deep, masculine tone. It brought back his smile, those adoring eyes, a flutter of kisses along my cheek.

He raised up off of me and used his heavy baton to smack against my hole a few times. I heard him pop the cap on the lube bottle and then looked back to see him slick up his cock with heavy strokes. He drizzled more of the lube on my hole and scooped it in with his fingers.

"You're sure, baby?" he asked again. I felt the tip of his cock press against my hole.

"Yes," I whined and wiggled my ass. I tried to push back on his cock, just take it myself, but he put his hands on my hips and held me. He leaned down over me and started to push in. He guided the floppy, slicked monster with one hand as the other rubbed up my chest and twisted my nipples.

"Don't push on it, Kasper. Just relax, open for me. Let me in, spread that boy hole for the cock that owns it," Amir whispered in my ear as he began to press inside me. He rubbed my tummy as his cock stretched my hole.

"Ahhh fuck that's big," I whined. I turned my head to the side and his lips met mine to soothe me. He slid inside me in tiny increments, pausing to kiss me, rub me, praise me, stroke my cock. He kept offering to stop, said it was admirable to even get this far. But I wouldn't let him.

"No, please... I can... handle... fuck," I bit my lip from the pain. I knew we would have to get through this if I was going to be his. I wanted to be his. I wanted to please him.

"Fuck that's tight! Fuck baby... This can't feel good," Amir noted as he pushed in deeper.

"Feels... so... good," I lied as I inhaled sharply with a groan. "Uhhh."

He pushed in again and I yelped in pain.

"Ok, no more!" He held there and wrapped both arms around me, squeezing me against his chest. He sucked on my earlobe and told me again how perfect I felt.

"That's all of it? I did it?" I asked between gasps for air. I felt suddenly proud of myself for taking him. It felt like someone had shoved their hand inside me.

"That's about half. But... It's so tight. You're sure you're not a virgin?" Amir asked as though that's something one could be confused about.

"I'm not, but... I've only been with regular guys... fuck that's huge," I sniffed back the tears that leaked out of my eyes. He held me and tried to calm me with half a monster lodged in my ass.

"Where do you meet these `regular guys?'" Amir laughed as though I'd only been fucked by elves. We breathed together as my ass adjusted to him. He stayed rock hard through it as we calmed ourselves. He made polite conversation as though we were strangers in an elevator.

Finally it felt ok. Amir started to slowly slide out and then push back in. He took it slowly. I kept focusing on the pain, every breath accompanied by a "Huhhhhh." My cock was still hard for some reason. It had a line of precum that hung down from the tip to the bath water.

"Breathe with me, Kasper. It will feel good when you allow it," Amir said and kissed lightly on my ear. His voice went up like he was talking to a pet. He started to push in and out of me. I breathed through gritted teeth.

"So... fucking... tight. I'm gonna cum soon, baby," Amir said. I heaved a sigh of relief. I didn't know how much longer I could last. His snake crawled in and out of me. It was the weirdest mixture of pleasure and pain I'd ever felt. I got hit by a burst of ouch and then a wave of wonderful. It was confusing, but my cock continued to leak.

"Fucking wonder pussy... fuck, Kasper... That is so tight. I've never had one so perfect," Amir growled as he started to speed up.

"It hurts, Stop! Stop!" I finally admitted when he pushed too far. I let a few tears roll down my cheek. I couldn't be brave anymore.

"Ok, ok," Amir snapped out of his ecstasy and held still. He breathed deeply against my ear.

"I'm sorry... I want it so bad," I admitted defeat.

"No, my love. My sweet angel. I can't feel good if you don't," Amir said and kissed down my neck as he slowly slid out of me. He put a hand to my cheek and turned my face to see him. He licked at my tears and then kissed me. We made out as he slowly took his cock out.

He got it out and I felt a loss inside me. He sat back down in the tub and spread his legs. He turned me to face him and then I knelt between his legs and looked down at his huge, proud cock. He gave it a stroke and then pulled it back. He let it go and it thumped against his stomach a few times. He brought me in between his thighs so our cocks were together.

"Yours makes mine look so tiny," I noted. My pale, white cock laid against his dark monster. He gripped them together and stroked us. I leaned down and we kissed as my cock rubbed against his.

"It's perfect, Kasper. It fits you," Amir said and jerked on our dicks. He had his fingers around mine and just his thumb around his. I felt the thick vein that ran along the underside of his shaft. It throbbed as he jerked us.

"Fuck that feels so...." I didn't even finish my sentence before my cock started to pulse and shoot. My body rocked as he jerked my cock against his. He put a hand on my back and rubbed it as I fell against his chest and spurted my seed over his chest as my body spasmed.

"Uhhhh," Amir growled as his body joined mine. He shoved his tongue in my mouth and his hand went down to rub my ass. His finger felt around my stretched hole as our bodies rocked together and coated each other in cum.

"Fuh!" I yelled with his tongue in my mouth. I shot two last volleys over his chest and felt his thick cum shoot up to my pecs. We twisted and rocked together; hands exploring each other, lips wrestling. I finished and collapsed into his arms as he let go of my cock. He finished by humping against me while his arms held me against his chest.

We laid there together to recover when an alarm went off on his phone.

"Ten minutes, baby. We need to clean up," Amir said and grabbed a bottle from the side of the tub. I was spent, exhausted, but I tried to help him as we cleaned each other. He rubbed bodywash over my back and down to my hole. We had to scrub to get the cum off each other. The bath had gone cold and I started to shiver.

"Almost done, baby," Amir said. We finished soaping each other and then he got out to get us towels. We dried each other in a hurry and then brushed our teeth. He had bought a special toothbrush for me to keep in his bathroom.

We got dressed in pajamas. He'd put a small section of clothes for me in his closet. He really was a planner. He thought of everything.

He delivered me back to my bedroom just as Mr. Hamad was coming to check on us. He smiled when he saw me happy, clean, and dressed for bed.

"You feel ok, little one? You'll be ok to sleep alone?" Mr. Hamad asked noting that the nights before I'd been with them.

"I'll hold him until he falls asleep." Amir offered. I nodded happily and turned towards his chest.

"Ok, but I'll leave the door unlocked between our rooms. If you need us during the night, come wake me up. Whatever the hour. Tomorrow you will see the psychiatrist and hopefully he can help you feel better too. You are safe here and always have a place with us," Mr. Hamad affirmed.

"Thank you, sir." I opened my arms and he leaned down to hug me.

Amir and I got into my little twin bed. It was one of those expensive mattresses that conforms to your body and supports everything perfectly. He laid down and then I fell asleep on his chest while we talked and laughed. His arms felt so safe that all my worries just sort of faded.

I was warm. I was safe. I was his. I was home.

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