Just Together

By JM

Published on Dec 18, 2001

Gay

Disclaimer: This story is fiction. It makes no claims to the true personality and sexuality of anyone involved. You already know if you shouldn't be reading this.

------------------ Just Together by jm_stories@yahoo.com ------------------

Chapter XIV - Jonny Original post 18 Dec 2001 Revised 7 Feb 2002

*** [ August 14, Tuesday ]

I tried not to cry as Jonah and Charlie pulled away, but the tears wouldn't stop. I'm such a girl. I turned away and went inside so I wouldn't have to watch them drive away. God, this sucks. I've had too many good-byes this summer. I don't ever want to have to say good-bye to anyone ever again. At least Jay went to Matt's. I swear I'm gonna kill him if he doesn't chill out. How could anyone be so damn hyper?

Jeanie left early this morning. I would normally go hang out with her. Can't do that anymore. I hope this year doesn't suck.

"Hey. How're you doin'?" Joey asked me as he walked out of his room while I was about to walk into mine to lay down. Not really anything else that I felt like doing.

"Fine," I said, pretty unconvincingly, and closed my door. Thankfully, he let it drop. I just don't feel like anything right now. No, I take that back. I feel like remodeling Jay's room. I'm stuck with a nine-year-old. A straight nine-year-old at that. Pictures of bimbos on the walls. Michael Jordan. Shaq. Cars. All typical. I should hang up an 'NSYNC and Hanson poster just to mess with him. Maybe later. I just want to take a nap.

*** [ Wednesday ]

Damn. Not even a whole day has passed and there's already someone moving in to Jeanie's house. I hope it's someone cool. Maybe with kids and someone around my age. Hopefully a guy, though. Last thing I want is some girl hanging on me. Well, a guy is good as long as he's gay or not a 'phobe. If he's straight he'd better be ugly.

I stood next to the front fence next door and watched the movers carry stuff in. A few of them must have been college students 'cause they were younger and looked pretty hot. About ten minutes later a mini van pulled in behind the moving truck and a family slowly got out. Must be the new people. The father looked Hispanic, but the mother didn't. Two girls, and they looked like twins. At least they're too young to be interested in me. Maybe Jay.

"Get UP, Adam! We're here!" One of the girls squealed loudly at the van. I saw a shoe come flying out at her and chuckled.

"Mom! Adam threw a shoe at me," the girl squealed.

"Stop tattling, Ashley," the mother dismissed and walked up to the house. The father had already gone in.

"Who are you? Why are you watching us?" The other twin said as she walked up to me.

"I'm Jonny, and I'm just watching the new people moving in. My best friend lived here until yesterday," I said.

"Well he's not here anymore so you can go away," she huffed and walked up to the house.

What a little bitch. Oh well. I turned to go when I saw a pair of legs poke out from the van like someone was lying on the floor and stretching. Guy legs. Nice guy legs. I paused and waited for the rest of the guy -- Adam, apparently -- to appear. A few seconds later the legs dropped and a guy rolled out like he was stiff from being in the van for a long time. He stretched and looked my way. Damn. He was cute. Really cute. Not humpy sexy, but just damn cute. Very light Hispanic features and half bleached hair that was really short. He finished his stretch and stiffly walked over to me.

"Hey, dude. Adam," he said and held out his hand.

"Jonny," I said and shook his hand. "Where are you moving from?"

"San Diego, dude. I'm so bummed about not having a beach anymore."

"You lived on the beach?"

"No, dude. We had a house," Adam smiled.

"Was this house on the beach?"

"Naw, but it was only about twenty minutes on my bike."

"Well now that you're in the big city you can take the L to the beach," I smiled. He certainly was easy on the eyes.

"What beach? There's no ocean around here."

"Lake Michigan may as well be an ocean."

"Can you surf on it?"

"You wouldn't want to even if you could. It's too cold."

"You live around here?"

"Nope. I travel the country looking for people who are moving in, and then watch them," I smiled.

"Dude, that's whacked," Adam laughed.

"Yea. I live about a block down. My best friend lived here until yesterday. I just wanted to see who was moving in."

"Adam!" His father yelled from the doorway.

"Hey, dude. Sorry. Gotta do moving stuff. Maybe we can hook up tonight or tomorrow. You can fill me in on what there is to do around here."

"Yea, sure. What time?"

"I don't know, dude. Which house do you live in? I'll just come down when I can. If you don't see me by eight, then it'll have to be tomorrow."

"Okay. It's 1636. Big brick house with a big front porch."

Adam looked around. "Dude. They're all big brick houses with big front porches," he laughed.

"Yea, but I'm only in one of them," I smiled.

"Okay. 1636."

"I could give you a hand, if you want. I'm not really doing anything today," I offered.

"Uh, thanks, but I'm just gonna be putting stuff away. The movers are doing all the heavy lifting. I need to put stuff away myself or I'll never be able to find anything."

"Okay. Well, see you later. 1636."

"1636. Got it. Later, dude," Adam said with a quick grin and ran up to the house where his father was impatiently waiting for him.

I walked back home and decided to see if Gareth was online.

+++ Gareth & Jonny chat +++

jonny15: hey

jonny15: HEY!!!!!

jonny15: HELLO!!!!!!!!!!

gareth85: AHHHH! i'm deaf!

jonny15: ;-)

gareth85: sorry. was in another room. u seem in a good mood. everything good at home?

jonny15: not really. kinda. where do i start?

gareth85: start with the bad.

jonny15: ok. dad disowned me and we got in a fight. i kicked his butt.

gareth85: FOFL GOOD! damn wanker!

jonny15: it was at my b-day party. sucked bad.

gareth85: sorry.

jonny15: ok. it's been ok after that. tommy is better.

gareth85: really?

jonny15: really. even took me driving and to get my learner's permit.

gareth85: maybe i'm amazed...

jonny15: me 2. jay is annoying.

gareth85: jay?

jonny15: i have to share a room with him. he's 9 and hyper.

gareth85: least he's not a phobe. is he?

jonny15: nope. couldn't care less.

gareth85: one thing good.

jonny15: yea. someone is moving into jeanie's house already.

gareth85: that's fast.

jonny15: yea. she just left yesterday.

gareth85: anyone cool? meet them yet?

jonny15: a little. maybe. there's a guy named adam who i think is around our age.

gareth85: cute? gay?

jonny15: cute: YES! gay: ?? i don't think so. he's coming over later.

gareth85: u move fast

jonny15: ;-) nah, he asked me. wants a guide. he's from san diego. says 'dude' all the time.

gareth85: just so u don't

jonny15: i hope not. only talked to him a few minutes. i'll tell u more when i know him better.

gareth85: u gonna tell him u r gay?

jonny15: yea. when the time is right. out is out.

gareth85: u r gonna have to change your nick now that u r 16

jonny15: yea. i'm thinking 'studpuppy' ;-)

gareth85: xcept it would have 2 b 'studpuppy234958932094859302394794803958' ;-P

jonny15: i'll think of something. gotta go. jay just walked in.

gareth85: start moaning and freak him!

jonny15: no way! might excite him. icky!

gareth85: FOFL ok. let me know how new guy turns out.

jonny15: adam. will do. luv u. big hugs

gareth85: kiss kiss bye

++++++

"Who were you talking to?" Jay asked and flopped down on the bottom bunk -- my bed.

"My friend, Gareth."

"You have friends?" Jay teased.

"One or two. I know something you don't," I teased back.

"That you're a dork? I already knew that," Jay smiled.

"Okay," I shrugged and turned back to my computer.

"What?"

"Huh?"

"What do you know?" Jay asked.

"I met the new people who are moving into Jeanie's old house."

"Yea. So?"

"They were twin girls. Probably your age," I smiled.

"Were they cute?" Jay asked, trying not to seem interested.

"How would I know? They were girls," I laughed.

"Yea, but you can still tell if they're cute."

"I think you'd like them."

"Cool. Maybe Matt and me can double date them. We could even trade off," Jay smiled.

"Swapping?"

"What? They're twins. They'd probably try it anyway. That's what they do in the movies, and Mick and Mike at my school try to do it too."

"You and Matt date Mick and Mike?" I teased.

"Ew. Gross. Just 'cause you're gay doesn't mean I am."

"I know. It's probably for the best anyway."

"What? Why?"

"That you're straight."

"Why?"

"'Cause no guy would want you," I smiled.

"Lots of guys want me, but they're just outta luck. They can look but they can't touch," Jay defended smugly.

"Who?"

"I don't know. Lots of guys. Everyone wants me. I'm cute."

"Your mom has to say that."

"It was Trisha at the pool. She told me I was cute."

"She's the retarded one, right?"

"No more retarded than you, and she's old. Like 20 or something."

"Yea, okay, so an old lady thinks you're cute. Are you here for a reason, or just to bug me?"

"It's my room. I can come in here any time I want. It's time for dinner, though."

After dinner and dishes, I went up to my room to check for new stories online. The boy-band section of Nifty is totally ruined for me now that I know a couple of them. I was just getting into a new story by Comicality when I heard Joey yelling for me.

"Yea?" I called as I ran to the top of the stairs.

"You have a visitor. He's in the living room," Joey said and left.

I went down and found Adam sitting on the sofa being interrogated by Dr. Mars.

"Hey, Adam. All unpacked?" I smiled as I walked in.

"Hey, dude. Mostly. Enough for tonight," Adam answered.

"Adam was just telling me how much he's gonna miss the beach. You guys should go to the lakefront tomorrow, if it's nice," Dr. Mars said.

"Maybe."

"Do it while you can. School starts next week and it'll be cold before you know it."

"I know," I said and gave Dr. Mars a you're-being-weird look. "Hey, Adam. You wanna take a walk?"

"Sounds good, dude," he said and jumped up.

We got out of there quickly before Dr. Mars could continue his words of wisdom. I like Dr. Mars, but he can be a bit weird and talks a lot.

"Is that your house, dude? I so totally thought I had the wrong house when that black guy answered the door," Adam said.

"Kinda. I live there now. I just moved in."

"You just moved, too?"

"Kinda."

"Kinda," Adam laughed.

"I moved in there to keep me away from my dad, but he's disowned me now, so..."

"Dude. That's harsh. Why keep you away from your dad and all?"

"He can't deal with having a gay son," I said and watched for Adam's reaction. I'd rather get it all out of the way before I got to know him better.

"Just for that? He like some radical Christian?"

"No. He's not religious at all. Just hates gays... So you don't have a problem with it?"

"With what?"

"Me being gay."

"No. Why would I? I'm straight, just so you know."

"Just that a lot of people are afraid that if they're around a gay person that other people will think they're gay."

"So? I bet you get a bunch of girls interested in you, right?"

"Yea," I said and rolled my eyes.

"See? Now if I'm around you, then they come over and I'll have no competition. Maybe I could even let them think I'm gay and let them convince me that they could convert me," Adam grinned and wagged his eye brows.

"Horn-dog."

"You know it," Adam laughed. "You don't have a boyfriend?"

"Nope, and don't worry: you aren't my type."

"Why not? I'm fine," Adam smirked and strutted down the sidewalk like a pimp.

"'Cause you're straight and have a stupid walk," I smiled.

"Oh well. So where'd you move from?"

"Huh?"

"You said you just moved in."

"Oh, yea. Just across the alley from where I'm at now. Not really moving that far, though I was in New York City for most of the summer. I just got back and moved in on Sunday."

"That's cool. I've never been to New York, except at the airport. What were you doing there?"

"Staying away to let things cool off at home."

"Oh. Sorry."

"Don't be. I had a great time."

"Did you, like, run away or something?"

"No. I was dropped off. Joey, the guy who answered the door, and Tommy, my brother, took me there and dropped me off at Jonah's. Jonah is Joey's cousin."

"Are you related to Joey and Jonah?"

"Not officially. Tommy and Joey are best friend since forever. Jonah was too until he told them he was gay. They've gotten over that now. At least Joey has. We've lived next door since before I was born. Joey and Jonah are as much my big brothers as Tommy is."

"That's cool that you're close like that. There was no one under 40 in the neighborhood I moved from. It totally sucked," Adam said.

"Yea. I didn't realize how cool it was until this summer. I had a great time in New York."

"What'd you do?"

"Everything. Jonah is dating Michael Pitt. He's the guy who played Henry on 'Dawson's Creek.'"

"Okay. I kinda remember who that is."

"So Michael lives with Jonah and was doing a play that Jonah directed with Charlie Hunnam, who is a British movie star."

"You hang out with all movie stars?"

"A lot. Lance and Justin from 'NSYNC were also staying there for a while 'cause they'd worked on Jonah's play."

"How many celebrities did you meet?"

"Um. I don't know. 'NSYNC. Nick from the Backstreet Boys. Charlie. Michael. Kerr and Michelle from 'Dawsons Creek.' Um... We went to MTV a couple of times and a club with the people from there. Oh, we were also extras in a movie with Devon Sawa and hung out with him one night. Uh...I think that's it."

"That's so cool. What was the movie?"

"I don't know. They didn't tell us. We just sat in a restaurant all morning."

"Sounds boring."

"Maybe if you'd done it before. Jonah was bored. Gareth and I had fun 'cause it was all new and really interesting to watch how they did everything."

"Who's Gareth?"

"Gareth is my best friend. He lives in the UK. His dad had a business trip to New York and he brought him so we got to hang out. It was great. Oh, I met Conor from Bright Eyes as well."

"Bright Eyes?"

"A band. Remind me to let you listen to them. They're great."

"I feel so small town," Adam said.

"Why?"

"Because you've met all these people and been all these places. The only place I've been outside of SoCal is Barcelona, and even then it was mostly in the country outside the city."

"That's further than I've been. I'd love to go to Europe. Why'd you go?"

"My dad has family there."

"And you don't?" I teased.

"Technically. I'd never met any of them before and didn't know who most of them were. On top of that, their English is as bad as my Spanish. Mom and Dad use Spanish when they don't want us to know what they're talking about. I pick up on some of it, but they talk too fast."

"So it was a family reunion?"

"Yea."

"I hate those. We had one a few years ago. It was in Michigan, so I didn't even get to go anywhere cool. Just lots of people I didn't know telling me how much I've grown since I was born."

"At least you didn't have to sit on a plane for 15 hours for the same thing."

"No, just a car for five. At least you got to fly. I've never been on a plane."

"Really?"

"Nope. My dad would rather drive for days than take a plane. We once went to Disney World for vacation when I was younger. We drove the whole way. It totally sucked and took forever."

"Oh yea. You should try driving from San Diego. It took us three days to get here."

"It's not three days from San Diego."

"Dude. I'm tellin' ya. It took three days. It'd be less if you drove all the time, but we stopped at motels to sleep and ate in restaurants sometimes instead of in the car. My sisters also had to pee all the time and were whining the whole way. You'll learn to hate them," Adam grimaced.

"I met one. Sorry, but she was kinda bitchy," I smiled.

Adam busted up laughing. "That was probably Amy. I got grounded last year 'cause I got her a t-shirt for her birthday that said B.I.T. on it."

"B.I.T.?"

"Bitch In Training," Adam laughed and so did I.

"You actually got her that?" I laughed.

"It was cheap and when I saw it I had to get it for her. The 'rents even found it funny even though they tried not to show it. Ashley is a tattle-tail and Amy is a bitch. I must have gotten all the wonderfulness."

"Yea, that must be it," I smirked and rolled my eyes.

"You have any younger brothers or sisters?"

"Nope. Just an older brother. If you want to include virtual older brothers, then add a bunch to that. I guess Jay could be like a virtual little brother."

"Jay?"

"Yea. He's 10, or will be soon. He'd be okay if he wasn't so hyper. I have to share a room with him."

"That sucks. At least I have my own room."

"Yea. I'd prefer my own room, but I don't have much choice."

"So what do you do for fun around here?" Adam asked.

"Whatever you want. Chicago is a big city. You can do just about anything."

"Yea, but what do YOU do?"

"Depends on who I'm with, how I feel and what the weather is. In the summer I'd always go with people to lake or a pool. Especially if was really hot. I had to work with Dad in the summer, so I couldn't do a lot during the week. In the winter I try to stay indoors. Play on the 'net. Go to this cool coffee house I know. Go to the movies. Whatever. Just stuff."

"Why do you say that like it's in the past? You don't do that stuff anymore?"

"Not this past summer. Dad didn't want me on the job site and I ended up in New York. Mostly, I liked this summer better."

"Okay. What about school?"

"Which one are you going to?"

"Um, I don't know. What one do you go to?"

"Were you in the AP classes, or just the regular ones?"

"The AP."

"Cool. So am I. The people in the AP program usually go to Northwestern. It's like a charter school or something for AP students."

"Northwestern? That's a school name?"

"Yea. It's near the university. Some of the teachers teach at both. It's a good school. You have to test-in to get in, though. Otherwise you have to go to the general public school."

"I'll have to ask the 'rents about it. What about the people?"

"They're okay, I guess. I've known most of them since, like, forever. It's probably like anywhere else. Jocks and their cheerleaders. Nerds. Motorheads. Druggies. Music and theatre geeks. Everything in between. Everyone is pretty smart, though, and the classes are usually pretty hard."

"Where do you fit?"

"I don't. I was in concert choir, play sports and am gay. Kinda like all and none."

"What sports?"

"Soccer and track."

"Soccer? Cool. I played at my old school. How good is the team?" Adam said excitedly.

"We did okay last year. We were fifth in the region, I think. How was the team at your old school?"

"Dude. We sucked bad," Adam confided sadly. "There were only four of us on the team who were any good. Is there a place to play around here?"

"The best place with a field that big is at school. We usually play inside."

"How do you get there?"

"You want to go now? We don't have a ball. I don't even think the field is open."

"No, man. How do we get to school? Bus? Train? Walk? I think the train would be kinda cool 'cause I've never been on a train."

"You've never been on a train?" I asked.

"No. We had busses in San Diego."

"Weird. I've never lived anywhere where they didn't have a train. Anyway, we take the train to school, or your parents can drop you off. Traffic is usually really bad and there's no parking there, so I'd recommend the train. You're gonna have to learn how to get around on the L."

"The L?"

"Yea. The train. Subway, kinda. The L. It's mostly above everything instead of underground. Elevated. Most people call it the L. I don't know why they didn't build it underground, but it's almost all, like, a storey or two above everything until you get way out."

"Okay. Does it get really cold here? Mom's taking us shopping tomorrow 'cause she said we'd need winter clothes."

"Depends on what you call cold," I smiled.

"Fifty degrees is cold," Adam said seriously.

I started laughing. "It never gets to fifty below, unless you count the wind chill."

"Dude. You're not serious, are you?"

"Yea. It's not that cold very often, but it has happened a few times. It's usually around 15¡F or so during the winter. The wind is what makes it feel really cold."

"I'm so gonna hate this," Adam grumbled.

I laughed at his shock. "By the time March comes you'll be walking around in shorts when it gets up to 50¡F."

"No way."

"Really. You get used to the cold. The only thing I hate is shoveling snow. They NEVER close school because of snow. I think I've only had, maybe, five total snow days in my entire school history."

"Snow could be cool. I've gone skiing in the mountains. It was pretty nice."

"Yea, but wait until you have to shovel it all the time and have a couple feet of it over everything all winter."

"You're just messing with me. This isn't the arctic or something."

"I'm not messing with you. It's called lake effect snow. We get a lot of it. Not like the arctic, but more than enough for me."

"This is just so uncool."

"What?"

"Having to leave the beach to move to the damn arctic."

"Yea, but look at the bright side. You met me," I smirked.

"And how is that supposed to make me feel better?" Adam joked.

"Things can't get any worse, can they?" I said, opposite of what he was probably expecting.

"That's whacked, dude."

I shrugged with a smile. "You wanna go to a coffee house?"

"It's too hot out for coffee."

"You don't have to drink coffee. They've got lots of things to drink. It's only about a five minute ride from here."

"Is it air conditioned?"

"Yep."

"Then what are we waiting for?"

We got to the L platform just in time, switched trains at Howard and got off at South Blvd. Adam seemed to be impressed with it. I guess it could be cool if you've never been on one before. Fortunately he had money with him. I told him he could get a student pass for a year that was cheaper than paying each time. We walked down to Wilder CafŽ. Bill was working the front counter and Dave was restocking the cold drink cooler.

"Hi, Dave," I said as I opened the other door to the cooler to grab an iced tea.

"Hey there, Jonny. Is it a good night?" Dave asked.

"Yep," I smiled. "This is Adam, Dave. He just moved here."

"Nice to meet you, Adam," Dave said and shook Adam's hand after wiping it off on his apron.

"You too."

"What do you want to drink?" I asked Adam.

"Um, one of the iced tea with peach."

I handed Adam the bottle and shut the cooler door.

"Hey Dave. I had this cool type of ginger ale in New York that you should get. They called it ginger beer and it had hot peppers in it," I said.

"You mean this stuff?" Dave smiled and handed me a bottle off the bottom of the side he was restocking.

"Yea. I think. It was a different brand, but it's probably the same. You just get this?"

"Nope. Had it for quite a while."

"Oh. Okay. Thanks. Talk to you later."

We walked up to the counter with our drinks. I brought the ginger beer with me.

"Hi, Bill. Can I get two glasses for the ginger beer?"

"Hi, Jonny. That it?" Bill asked and punched keys on the cash register.

"And another ice tea," I said and showed him Adam's drink.

"Dude. I can pay," Adam whispered.

"You can pay next time."

"Okay."

I paid for our drinks and we went to the back. I opened the ginger beer and split it between the two glasses.

"You gotta try this stuff. It's super weird, but good," I said and handed Adam a glass. He gave me a doubtful look, and then took a small sip.

"Tastes just like...oh. Hot. That's good," he smiled and downed the glass. I downed mine as well and then opened my iced tea.

We talked about nothing in particular for about an hour. I really liked him. He seemed really smart and cool and laughs a lot. Even better is that he doesn't care that I'm gay. I hope we'll become good friends. It was getting late so we headed back. I dropped Adam off at his house and then walked home. It was a good night.

"I'm back," I called as I walked in the door.

"Where'd you go?" Dr. Mars asked.

"We just walked around and then went and got something to drink."

"Boyfriend material?" He smiled.

"If he wasn't straight," I smiled back.

Dr. Mars shrugged.

"It's okay. I think he might be a cool friend."

"You told him?"

"Yep. He didn't care."

"Good. I guess we need to talk about curfew. As soon as school starts you need to be home by ten. If you're going to be later than that I want a phone call. Friday and Saturday you can be out 'till midnight, but I still want to know where you're at. Understood?"

"Yea. Same as at home. What about until school starts?"

"Midnight."

"Huh?! I can't stay out 'till midnight now," Jay complained.

"Jonny's sixteen. You're nine."

"I'm almost ten."

"You can stay out 'till midnight when you're sixteen. Not before."

"What if I'm with Jonny?"

"Doesn't matter. Your curfew is your curfew. You're only exempt if you're with an adult -- and that doesn't mean that there is any random adult in the area."

Jay gave him an annoyed look.

"I'm going to bed. Night," I said and went upstairs. I cleaned up and then continued reading the story I'd started earlier. Jay came up about an hour later.

"I thought you said you were going to bed?" Jay asked as he walked in.

"I am. I'm just reading before I go to sleep."

"What are you reading?"

"A story."

"Duh. What's it about?"

"Gay kids."

"You're reading porn?" Jay said a little excitedly.

"No, it's a story. Hardly has any sex at all."

"You better not let Dad catch you."

"Why? He can read it if he wants. It's a story. You're the one with all the porn sites in your browser history."

"I just went once," Jay defended.

"That's a long once, from what I saw," I smiled.

"Why were you on my computer? You have your own."

"Duh. I had to see what your network settings were so I could set mine up to get on the 'net."

"How did you get past my password?"

I just smiled.

"That's not cool. I didn't snoop through all the porn pictures and stories on your computer."

"Then how do you know I have them?"

"Um, I guessed."

"Yea, right. I've got mine password protected now."

"I know how to get around that."

"Not the way I did it."

"How?"

"In the firmware. I found the instructions online. It's kinda hard to do."

"Show me how to do it on mine."

"You can't. Yours is too old."

"It's not that old."

"Too old for that hack."

"Send me the link to where you found the instructions so I can see for myself."

"Fine."

"Dad and I went down to meet the new people in Jeanie's house."

"Are they nice?" I asked.

"Don't you know? I thought you were with the guy all night."

"It wasn't all night, and the guy's name is Adam. Anyway, I just met him. We didn't go to his house."

"Okay. The parents seemed okay, for parents. Amy and Ashley were really cute, but not very nice."

"Yea. They are kinda bitchy," I smiled.

"I thought you said you didn't meet them?"

"I briefly met one of them this morning. Adam told me about them. Still hoping you and Matt can double-date?" I teased.

"Not them," Jay said and made a face. "Are you over being mad at your dad?" He asked after a few minutes.

"No. I don't think 'mad' is quite right, anyway."

"I think your dad is an asshole. Dad even says he is, and Dad never calls anyone an asshole."

"I know. Can we not talk about it? Okay?"

"Sorry... Did you have fun at Jonah's?"

I gave up trying to read until Jay went to sleep. "Yea, it was great," I said and turned to him.

"Did you really meet all those famous people?"

"Yea. Why would I lie about it?"

"I don't know. What about your friend from England. Did you guys have sex?"

"No -- not that it's any of your business."

"Were you scared when you met those people? Like 'NSYNC and all?"

"At first."

"Do you think Jonah would let me come stay with him next summer?"

"I don't know. Probably not until you're older."

"You know, I really hate having to wait 'till I'm older for everything."

I shrugged. "I had to wait, too. Still do."

Jay pulled off his shorts and shirt, throwing them in the corner. He was about to get in bed, but turn to me and smiled.

"Does this turn you on?" He teased and struck a pose.

"Does what turn me on?"

"Seeing me in my underwear."

"It turns me on as much as it turns you on to see me, dorkus."

"Okay. Just checking," he smiled and climbed up to the top bunk. "Turn off the light."

"Turn it off, yourself."

"I'm in bed."

"And I'm reading. You're the one who wants to sleep so you can turn off the light."

"This is my house. You're supposed to do what I say," Jay tried.

"It's your mom and dad's house, not yours, and it's YOU who has to listen to ME. I'm older," I countered.

"So? Just 'cause you're older doesn't mean you're my boss."

"Good. I don't want to be your boss. Turn off the light and go to sleep so I can read."

"Fine," Jay sighed and jumped out of bed to turn off the light.

I went back to my reading. About an hour later the words were getting blurry, so I shut down and went to bed.

*** [ Thurs, Aug 16 ]

"Wake up, butthead. Your boyfriend is here," Jay said loudly and pushed my shoulder.

I groaned and rolled over to face him. "What?"

"Your boyfriend it here. He's downstairs."

"Huh? I don't have a boyfriend."

"The new guy. Adam."

"He's not my boyfriend. He's not even gay."

"Whatever. He's still downstairs."

I sat up in bed and rubbed my eyes before looking at the clock. Shit. It's only eight. This is still summer vacation. I pulled on some clothes and headed downstairs. Adam was sitting in the living room watching cartoons with Jay.

"Hey man," I grumbled. "What's up?"

"Hey dude. You just woke up?"

"Yea."

"Sorry. Someone told me you were already awake," he said and pointed to Jay.

Jay smiled.

"'S alright. What's up?" I asked as I flopped down in a chair.

"We're going shopping for winter and school clothes. Mom doesn't know where anything is at, so I thought I'd try to get you to come with us. You'll also save me from having to spend the day with just my sisters and my mom. Please," Adam pleaded.

I chuckled. "I guess I could go, but it's gonna cost you."

"Ew! He's gonna make you suck his dick," Jay said.

"No. I'm gonna make him help me tie you up and throw you in a dumpster," I said.

"You're really excited about the idea of sucking his dick, aren't you?" Adam asked Jay with a smirk.

"Ew! No way!"

"Then why even bring it up? Obviously it's something you think about a lot if you bring it up out of the blue."

"'Cause I was tryin' to embarrass him. I don't think about his dick."

"Whose dick do you think about?" I smirked.

"I don't think about anyone's dick," Jay protested.

"Must be Matt's," I said knowingly to Adam.

"Is not!" Jay yelled.

"Who's Matt?" Adam asked.

"His boyfriend."

"He's not my boyfriend. He's my friend who's a boy. We're not gay."

"Why does it bother you so much?" Adam asked.

"It doesn't. I'm just not. Neither is Matt."

"Then stop being a dorkus about it. No one cares if you're gay or straight," I said.

"I just don't want people to think I'm gay 'cause we share a bedroom."

"Only stupid people would think that. Does that mean I'm mulatto as well? That I'm a hyper pain-in-the-ass? Besides, Jonah is gay and you don't treat him any differently."

"That's different. Jonah is practically my big brother."

"Mine too."

"Fine. I'll give you a break," Jay sighed.

"Whatever," I sighed. "What time are we going?" I asked Adam.

"As soon as you're ready."

"Um, okay. Give me a half-hour to take a shower and get dressed," I said and ran upstairs. I took a quick shower and got dressed.

"Hey. I'm ready," I said as I walked into the living room. Adam was talking to Mrs. Mars. "Morning, Mrs. Mars."

"Good Morning, Mr. Mathias," Mrs. Mars said and raised her eye brows.

"Yea, I know. Call you Aunt Mary," I said and rolled my eyes.

She just gave me a look. The "mom" look. "So when will you be back?" She asked.

"Before dinner. Hopefully," Adam said.

"Okay. Have fun, and don't pick on Jay too much," she smiled.

"Huh?" I asked.

"I'm going with you," Jay said.

"Why?"

"Because no one else is home. Welcome to one of your duties," Mrs. Mars smiled. "Good night," she said and went upstairs.

I shot Jay a death stare.

"I didn't ask to go. I can take care of myself. Mom said I had to or you had to stay home," Jay defended.

"Why aren't you over at Matt's?"

"'Cause he's goin' to see his grandparents. He's not gonna be back 'till Saturday."

"We can let him play with my sisters," Adam smiled.

"No, guys! Please?!" Jay pleaded. "I won't be a pain."

"Fine. First sign of being a pain, you walk with the girls," I said.

"I'll be cool. I promise."

"Alright. Let's go."

We walked down to Adam's house. It was apparent that his sisters thought Jay was cute and they were fawning and fighting over him. Adam and I were about busting a gut trying not to laugh -- at least not laugh too much. We went to a mall instead of going downtown. Once we got there Adam, Jay and I went in one direction while Mrs. Walker and the monster twins went in another. She even gave Adam a credit card to get his clothes.

"That wasn't funny, guys," Jay pouted.

"You're just too cute for your own good," I teased and gave him a shove.

"I know. It's horrible sometimes," Jay smiled.

"No one will ever love you as much as you love yourself," Adam teased him.

"Huh?" Jay asked.

"Never mind."

"If it weren't for self-love, I wouldn't get any lovin' at all," I smirked.

Adam busted up laughing. "Sad, but true. I know exactly what you mean."

"You're supposed to love yourself. Dad said that if you don't love yourself then you can't expect anyone else to love you," Jay said, confused.

"Nevermind. You're too young," I teased, knowing that saying that would make him upset.

"I'm not too young," Jay protested on cue.

"Then you'd know what we were talking about," Adam said.

"What store do you want to hit first?" I asked Adam.

"A&F. Do you think they have winter coats there?"

"Probably. What kind of coat do you want? Something like a parka or a trench coat?"

"I don't know," Adam shrugged. "Which is better?"

"Um, depends. A trench coat looks cooler and keeps more of you warmer, but isn't very good for playing. A parka is still warm and has more freedom of movement, but covers less of you."

"What do you have?"

"Both, but I usually wear the parka. The trench coat is for dress up."

"Only old people wear trench coats," Jay said.

"No they don't."

"Uh huh. Mom and Dad both have trench coats."

"They also wear pants. Does that mean that only old people wear pants?" I said and made a stupid face at him.

"No, but no one at my school wears trench coats. Only the teachers."

"Well, people at my school do wear trench coats."

"Whatever. I'll just find one I like and get that, whatever kind it is," Adam said and turned into A&F.

We were back by two. I left Adam to put stuff away and took Jay home. Dr. Mars went over to talk with Adam's parents about schools after dinner. Adam had to do something and couldn't come back over, so I started reading one of the books Jonah got me for my birthday.


Adam had to go register and test-in to Northwestern High School with his mom Friday morning. I reminded him to be sure to get a student train pass. He was burned out from the tests when he got back, but he got in. Joey got roped into taking Adam, Jay and me to Mt. Baldy in Michigan City for the rest of the day. It was great fun playing on the hill. Everyone busted a gut laughing when Adam jumped into the water, and then jumped up really fast and screamed. Hey, I told him the water was cold.


Saturday morning I went clothes shopping with Mom. She even let me drive. I think I did okay, but she was really tense and kept pointing out the obvious. It made me more nervous. I liked driving with Tommy better. Except for that, Mom and I had a good day out. Neither of us brought up Dad. I don't know what is going to happen there. Am I going to live with the Mars' until I graduate? I don't think Mom and Dad will get divorced. They do love each other. I don't know. Three years is a long time to live with someone else's family.

*** [ Mon, Aug 20 ]

Okay. I'm a freak. I admit it. I'm excited about getting back to school. Even if the year sucks, it'll be something to do. I don't think it's gonna suck, though. I have the feeling it's going to be a great year. Better than last year, at least.

I was still eating breakfast when Adam rang the doorbell. Dr. Mars let him in.

"Hey, dude. Running late?" Adam said as he walked into the kitchen.

"No. We've got time. Just finishing," I said as I rinsed out my bowl. I quickly finished my cup of coffee and rinsed that cup out as well. I hardly drank coffee at all last year, but I had it almost everyday when I was in New York. Now I like and almost expect to have a cup in the morning.

"Excited about your first day?" Dr. Mars said to no one in particular.

"Yep," I answered.

"Freak," Jay mumbled sleepily. "I hate that school starts so early."

"Early? You get to sleep in an hour longer than I do. Wait until you get to high school," I said.

Jay just grunted.

"Let's go, dude," Adam said, a bit tense.

"Okay. Bye," I said and went to grab my book bag. Adam followed me.

"Have fun," Dr. Mars said as we walked out.

"What are you so tense about? Nervous about starting school?" I asked Adam as we walked to the L platform.

"Yea, I guess. New school and all. That place is huge. I know I'm gonna get lost."

"It's pretty easy to find your way around. We have a few classes together, so you can follow me. Besides, most of our classes are on the same floor."

"Yea, okay. This is all just so different from San Diego. It's gonna take some time to get used to it."

"It won't take that long. After a couple weeks you'll be falling asleep on the train like everyone else," I smiled and looked at my watch. "We'd better hurry or we'll have to wait for the next train," I said and started jogging.

We reached the stairs as the train was pulling in and ran up the stairs as fast as we could. The first few cars were completely full, so we had to run back and finally squeezed in just before the doors closed.

"Fun, huh?" I smiled at Adam, who was pressed up against me and looked a bit overwhelmed.

"Is it always this crowded?"

"Yea. In the mornings. It's not as bad in the afternoon when we go home."

"I think I preferred the school bus," Adam grumbled.

We switched trains at Howard Station and had to do the same run and squeeze. A bunch of people needed to get out at Dempster. I squeezed to the side to let them pass. Adam stepped out to let them pass. Bad move. Before I could stop him the crowd pushed their way out and he was pushed back. The doors closed before he could get back to the door. I looked out the door window and mouthed that I'd wait for him and held up three fingers so he'd know it was three more stops. He just stood there with a confused 'what the hell' face. I busted up laughing as the train pulled away.

"Mathias!" I heard someone yell. I looked around the less crowded car to find Chris Parker waving at me.

"Hey, man," I said as I made my way over to where he was sitting. He was a Junior and on the soccer team. His stop is near the beginning of the run, so he usually gets a seat.

"Hey, man. Good to see you," he said and we pounded fists. "How was your summer?"

"It started out shitty and then really great. I was in New York for the past month-and-a-half."

"Cool. What'd you do there?"

"Just hang out. Get away from the family."

"Your dad still being a prick?" Chris asked. He knew I was gay, as did the rest of the soccer team. Most of them didn't care as long as I played a good game. It's really weird that the sports teams I was on didn't care, but my family did. Oh well.

"Yea. He kicked me out. I'm living with Joey Mars' family. What'd you do?"

"Work and hang out at the dunes. Nothing exciting. What were you laughing at earlier?"

I started laughing again. "Adam. He just moved here from San Diego. He stepped off the train to let people off and got stuck on the platform."

Chris laughed as well. "Obviously he doesn't know how to ride the train."

"Nope. Last week was his first time. Today was his first rush hour. You should have seen the look on his face as the train pulled away," I said and then started laughing again.

"He'll learn. What class is he in?"

"He's a Sophomore. He says he plays soccer, but I don't know how good he is. He said his last team sucked."

"Hopefully he doesn't suck too bad. We'll need him. Half the team graduated last year."

"Oh yea. Did you see any of them over the summer?"

"Just Mark. I helped him move into his dorm at Notre Dame. It's really nice. The campus is really cool. It's all grass and trees and old buildings."

"That's cool."

"You running Track again this year?"

"I think so."

"You're gonna get to play more this year, so you may not have the time. You'd better check with Coach before you sign-up."

"Yea. Maybe. It's a couple months away, yet."

"Oh man, did you hear what the musical is this year?"

"No. What is it?"

"We're doing 'West Side Story'. You should audition."

"You're the theatre geek. Not me," I teased.

"Come on, man. It'll be fun. It ends before practice starts. There are a lot of characters, so you'll probably get a part."

"Thanks," I said sarcastically.

"You know what I'm saying," Chris said and punched me on the arm. "I know you can sing."

"Maybe. When are auditions?"

"I don't know. Probably next week," he said and stood up as we got to Noyes, our stop.

"Let me know when. I'll think about it."

"Okay. You gonna wait for..."

"Adam."

"Yea. Adam."

"Yea. See ya later, man."

"Later," Chris said and headed for school.

I sat down on a bench and waited for Adam. Hopefully he caught the next train or we'll both be late for class. I thought about auditioning for the musical. I could probably do it, but not if I had to sing a solo or anything. I tried to remember how the songs from it went, but I'd only see a movie of it once a long time ago.

Fortunately, Adam did catch the next train and got here twenty minutes later. I just stood there with a grin as he walked off the train.

"Dude..." Adam sighed.

I burst out laughing at him.

"You suck. That was not funny," Adam pouted.

"Yea, it was. Sorry, but it was. Your face was like, 'what the hell? it's leaving without me,'" I teased.

"Fuck you. Let's go to school," Adam grumbled.

"Awww. Don't be pissy. Now you know that you don't step off the train during rush hour."

"Dude. What the hell was I supposed to do? People had to get out and I was in front of the door. There was no where else for me to go."

"Either squeeze to the side and let them squeeze past you, or if you have to step off, step to the side so you can squeeze back in as soon as the first rush passes. If you stand in the middle you're just gonna get carried away."

"Yea, yea. Anything else I need to know."

"I don't know. Stuff like that is just natural for me, so I didn't even think about warning you until it was too late."

"Yea, whatever," Adam grumbled and pulled his schedule out of his bag as we were walking into the school. "How do I get to Room 335?"

"Follow me," I said and headed for the stairs. "Our first class is in 310, so you should be able to find it. My homeroom is in 324."

We got to the third floor and headed down the hall. A couple people said 'hi', but everyone was rushing to get to homeroom before the bell. I stopped at my homeroom and pointed the way to Adam for his.

"See you in English," I said and went into my homeroom. The only seats left were in front. Oh well. Mrs. Miller is going to put us in alphabetical order first thing, anyway. I dropped down in my chair and dug a pen out of my bag for the ritual first day of school filling out of forms.

"'Sup, faggot," Billy Mascow, asshole extraordinare, said as he walked by me.

"'Sup, asshole," I said back.

"Wanna say that again, faggot?" He said as he turned around and stood over me.

"'Sup, asshole," I said and stood up, getting in his face.

"Good morning, everyone," Mrs. Miller said as she walked into the room before Billy could say anything else.

"You're dead," he mouthed and went to take a seat. I sat down.

"Great way to start the year, huh?" Amy Matthews, who was sitting behind me, said.

"Yea. You would have thought he might have grown up over the summer," I sighed.

"Once an asshole, always an asshole," Amy snickered.

The bell rang so we couldn't continue. Mrs. Miller took attendance and then put us in alphabetical order. We filled out a dozen forms, got our locker assignments, and then got the standard 'welcome back' speech. Finally the bell rang for first period and we all bolted.

Billy came up to me in the hallway.

"I'm gonna kick your ass, Mathias," he threatened.

"What is your problem?"

"You are."

"Why? I haven't done shit to you."

"I don't like faggots."

"So what? I never asked you to like me. In fact, I think I'd be pretty happy if you never said a word to me."

"Just back off, Mascow," Aaron Adams said and stood next to me. He was on the football team and was class president last year.

"Fuck off, Adams. This doesn't concern you," Billy said.

"I think it does. It's the first day and already you have a list of people who want to pound the shit out of you and your bigoted mouth. I know you don't want to add me to that list. So, once again, back off," Aaron warned.

Billy weighed his options and then stormed off to class.

"Thanks, man," I said to Aaron.

"Forget it. I'm just sick of him. He needs a serious ass kickin'."

"He may just get it. Thanks, anyway. Later," I said and ran down the hall to my first class. I slipped in the door just as the bell rang. Adam saved me a seat next to him and I dropped down into it.

The day was a waste as far as school work was concerned -- standard introductions and passing out of books and such. I talked with a ton of people throughout the day. It was pretty cool. It seemed like a lot of the people who kinda gave me the cold shoulder when I came out last year had chilled out and talked to me again without worrying that someone was seeing them talking to me. All in all I thought it was a great first day of school.

"So?" I asked Adam as we were riding home on the train. We were sitting with Chris.

"So what?"

"Good? Bad? Just different?"

"Different. I think it's going to be harder than my last school. The people seem cool, though. Well, except some asshole who slammed into me and called me a spic."

"Billy Mascow?" Chris asked.

"I don't know. Blonde hair in a buzz cut. Built. Looks like a football player."

"That's him. He's on the wrestling team, not the football team. You'll get used to it. He's an asshole to everyone. Word is that he pissed off a lot of people today. People are drawing straws to see who gets to kick his ass first," I smiled.

"What's his deal? Why's he such an ass to everyone?"

I shrugged. "Who knows. Who cares."

"Maybe his father beats him or something," Chris said.

"Has he always been like that?" Adam asked.

"As long as I've known him. We didn't go to the same school until last year. Why?"

"It's just weird that someone who was smart enough to get into that school is so stupid and hateful."

"Even smart people can be bigots," Chris said.

"Yea."

"So have you thought about auditioning? They start Wednesday," Chris asked me.

"Auditioning for what?" Adam asked.

"'West Side Story.'"

"I think so," I said. "As long as I don't have to do a solo."

"Everyone has a solo of some sort. I've heard you sing and you shouldn't worry about it. You have a better voice than Brent Foster. He says that he knows he's gonna get the part of Tony."

"He's a senior."

"So? You gonna audition, Adam?"

"I don't know. I've never been in a play before."

"Now's the time to start. Audition. It'll be fun. You're almost guaranteed a part as a Shark."

"A Shark? I don't know the show."

"It's basically a retelling of 'Romeo and Juliet', but with rival gangs. One is generic whites, the Jets, and the other is Puerto Ricans, the Sharks."

"I'm of Spanish descent, as in Spain, not Puerto Rican."

"No offense, man. That's what the show is about. One of the Jets falls in love with the sister of the leader of the Sharks. Standard 'Romeo and Juliet' story."

"Yea, okay. I'll think about it," Adam conceded.

We got to our stop a few minutes later and walked home, making plans to hook up later that night.

"Dude, you gotta come over and save me," Adam pleaded as I took the phone from Dr. Mars.

I laughed. "What? Your sisters picking on you?" I teased.

"No, man. The 'rents. I told them about the show. They went ape shit. Dad played in it in college and Mom loves the show. They ran out to get a copy of the movie of it and are making me watch it tonight."

"So how'm I supposed to help you?"

"Just come over and watch it with me. Maybe Dad won't start singing along if there's someone else here. Act as a buffer to keep my psycho 'rents in place."

I just laughed.

"Dude, they got EXCITED when I told them about the show. Like, really excited. Now I HAVE to audition," Adam complained.

"So? I'm gonna audition, too. Maybe you won't even get a part."

"That's not what Chris said."

"Yea, well Chris gets really excited about musicals and says lots of stuff. He's more gay than I am about that kinda stuff."

"He's gay, too?"

"Not that I know of. I'm just sayin' that liking musicals so much is such a stereotypical gay thing."

"Okay. So, dude, you gonna come over or what?"

"Let me ask." I asked Dr. Mars and he said it was fine. I relayed the message to a much relieved Adam and then headed over.

"What do YOU want?" Amy sneered as she answered the door.

"Are you ever nice to anyone?" I asked her.

"Not to my stupid brother's friends."

"Go away, Amy," Adam said as he got to the door and pushed her away. "Sorry, dude. They got out of their cage." He opened the door.

"I'm so glad I don't have any sisters," I said as I walked in.

"They should be back any minute. This is all your fault, you know."

"Why my fault?"

"'Cause you're gonna audition and you introduced me to Chris. If you weren't gonna audition I could just beg off."

"I don't know what you're freaking out about. I think it's cool that your parents are getting excited about something you're gonna do."

"Dude. They were singing show tunes at the kitchen table," Adam stated like that would answer everything.

"So? You should hear my dad sing in the shower. We had the Coast Guard show up once 'cause someone reported a beached whale dying," I smirked.

"Well, at least my 'rents can sing. Still..."

"Complaining about your weird parents?" Mrs. Walker teased as they walked in.

"No Mom. Of course not," Adam simpered.

"You're going to audition, too, aren't you, Jonny?" Mrs. Walker asked me.

"Yea."

"Good. You know my husband played Bernardo in a production at USC. That's where we met," she said and gave Mr. Walker a kiss on the cheek.

"You already told us, Mom," Adam sighed.

"I didn't tell Jonny. Now stop being embarrassed or I'll pull out baby pictures and give you something to be embarrassed about," she threatened and gave him the "mom" look.

I snickered at him.

"What are you laughing at? Maybe I'll go over to your house and get your mom to show me your baby pictures," Adam threatened.

"Good luck. My dad probably burned them."

"Why's that? Your father seemed nice enough," Mr. Walker said.

"When'd you meet my dad?"

"He's been over a couple times with your younger brother."

"That's Dr. Mars, not my dad. I'm just living with him."

"Oh? Why's that?"

"Uh, long story that I really don't want to get into right now."

"Okay..."

Thankfully, they let it drop. I just didn't feel like talking about Dad right now. It would put me in a crappy mood. They put in the movie and we watched it. I think Adam wanted to crawl under the sofa and die when his folks started singing along. I thought it was pretty cool -- especially since it wasn't MY folks. Anyway, I liked the show. It looked like it could be really fun and the music was great. Much better than those stupid musicals where people sing a song out of the blue about something stupid. I went home as soon as it was over.

*** [ Wednesday ]

I almost could have forgotten about the auditions if it weren't for Chris reminding me every time he saw me, and Adam freaking out about it. He was crazy nervous.

"Duuuude. You've gotta relax," I teased Adam as we walked to the theater after school.

"I can't do this. I'm gonna be sick," Adam said and turned the other way. I grabbed his arm and turned him back.

"Yea, you can. We'll both get chorus parts and it'll be easy."

"You sound like you're trying to convince yourself as well."

"I am," I smiled.

"Cool. You showed up," Chris said as he came up behind us.

"We said we would," I said.

"Dude-man, you look like you're gonna pass out," Chris teased Adam as he pushed him into the theater. A couple people had taken to calling Adam "dude-man" because...well, you can guess why.

We had to fill out an audition form first. There were a lot of people there. We might not even get a part. Mr. Wonka ( Really, that's his name. Bill Wonka. No one calls him Willy Wonka...to his face. ) told everyone how auditions would work. Today we would be dance auditions. Tomorrow would be singing auditions and Friday would be acting auditions. Call-backs would be on Monday and the cast list posted on Wednesday.

The girls, since there were fewer of them, went out in the hall to learn their dance while the guys went on the stage. AndrŽ, the choreographer, was a real dancer and taught us a really hard dance. We had to do all sorts of things like stand straight up and fall forward into a push-up, then roll over and do a backwards summersault to stand up again. Mark Pitkowski fell on his face when it tried it and got a bloody lip. Everyone was really careful after seeing what happened to him. We had to do barrel-rolls. Spins. A grapevine across the entire stage. It was really hard.

After two hours of teaching the dance, we had to do the audition in groups of five. After you danced you were allowed to go. I was in the second group and Adam was in the fourth. I think I did pretty well, but I know I'm gonna be sore tomorrow. Adam did great. He's a great dancer. He made it seem almost easy. I waited for him and we left when he was done.

"How'd I do?" Adam asked breathlessly as he gathered his stuff.

"You did great. I didn't know you were a dancer."

"Dude. No jokes."

"I'm serious."

He looked at me a minute. "Thanks."

"How'd I do?"

"Better than I did."

"No way."

"Okay, better than I thought I did. I almost fell when I did that back roll flip thing."

"We danced better than Charlie, and he was dancing in a professional show. Our dance was harder."

"Charlie?"

"Charlie Hunnam. Remember? The British movie star that was in the play Jonah directed."

"Yea, okay. I've never seen him in anything."

"He gave me a copy of his movie for my birthday. I haven't watched it yet. Maybe we can watch it this weekend."

"Yea. If we can still walk," Adam joked as we both walked kinda stiffly to the L platform.

"He's supposed to be on a sitcom in a few weeks. It's called 'Undeclared'. I don't know when it's gonna be on, though."

"If we get cast we won't be home to watch it, or we'll be doing homework."

"Yea. I'll have to tape it."

"Just 'cause you know him? You don't even know if it's a good show or not."

"I won't know until I see it. I'll probably tape the first couple. If it sucks I won't tape any more."

The train arrived and we got on. Because it was later, the train was pretty crowded, but it was still early enough in the run that we were able to get a seat. As soon as I sat down I was ready to take a nap. I think Adam actually did fall asleep a few times and we almost missed switching trains.


The singing auditions were easier for me. Adam had a good voice, but you could hear how nervous he was 'cause his voice was a little shaky. The acting auditions were okay. I don't think I did very good. Adam was about the same. I thought he did okay, but he didn't think so.


The first week of school had been wicked-busy, but it was finally the weekend. Tommy took me driving, thankfully, and then Mom and I went out for lunch and talked. It was okay. I just don't know how to deal with this. How to deal with her. I still love her -- I mean, she's my mom -- but without seeing her all the time it was weird. It's almost like she was becoming someone else's mom. It's not like she's really being replaced since Mrs. Mars works shifts and I only really see her at night before she leaves 'cause she's on third this month. I don't know. It's just weird.

I had to do housework and laundry when I got home. It's harder to keep your room clean when you have a slob for a roommate. Gareth wasn't online, believe it or not, so I just sent him an email. Once I got started I replied to a whole bunch of email that I'd kinda been ignoring, and sent some to Justin, Lance, Charlie, Jonah and Michael. That got me in the mood to write so I sat down and scribbled down a couple pages in my journal until Jay came to get me for dinner. Adam finally came over around eight.

"Wanna watch that movie with Charlie?" I asked.

"Yea, sure. What's it called?"

"'Queer as Folk.'"

"A gay film?"

"I think so."

"Dude, as cool as I am with people being gay, I don't want to watch guys having sex."

"It's not a porno. It was on TV in the UK. Besides, if I can stand to watch a guy get it on with a girl, then you can stand to watch a guy with a guy."

"That's totally different."

"How?"

"It just is. You see a guy with a girl all the time. You'd have to hide in a cave by yourself not to see that."

"So you're just desensitized to it. Once you see guys kissing and getting it on a few times you won't think anything is weird about it... Or are you afraid it may get you excited?" I teased.

"In your dreams," Adam shot back.

"Sorry to disappoint you, but you haven't been in any of my dreams."

"Dude, I just don't want to do any gay things."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? I'm talking about watching a movie that has gay characters, not having sex," I said sarcastically.

"It means gay things. Watching gay movies. Anything gay."

"I am gay."

"Well, I'm not."

"I know. I'm not asking you to be, or even to try it. God, are you hung up on yourself, or what? Watching a gay movie doesn't make you gay anymore than watching a straight movie makes me straight."

"Why's it such a big deal?"

"I don't know. Why are you making it a big deal? You wouldn't think anything of seeing a straight movie with me, and I wouldn't think anything of it, either. It's just a movie. Did you suddenly become insecure with your manhood?"

"Fuck you."

"Nope. Remember? You don't do that."

"Who's fucking who?" Joey asked as he stood in the doorway.

"It's not important. Adam was just leaving," I said.

"No, I don't think he was. What's the deal?" Joey said like he'd decided to make us talk this out. I guess better him than Dr. Mars, and I know Dr. Mars would if he'd heard us.

"I just don't want to watch a gay movie. What's wrong with that?" Adam protested.

"You wanted to watch it until you found out it was a GAY movie," I shot back.

"What's the movie?" Joey asked.

"'Queer as Folk.' It's the one Charlie was in. The one he gave me for my birthday."

"So why don't you want to watch it now, Adam?" Joey asked.

"I just don't."

"Humor me. Give me a real reason."

"It would just be weird seeing guys get it on."

"Have you ever seen guys get it on?"

"Not really."

"Then that's why it's weird."

"I just can't relate," Adam tried.

"You seem to have related with Jonny just fine so far."

"And that's a stupid reason for not wanting to watch a movie. Do you have to be able to relate to everyone in every movie you watch? I mean, do you watch a horror flick and see yourself as the axe murderer?" I said.

"He's got you there," Joey smiled.

"Fine. I'll watch the damn movie," Adam sighed.

"We don't HAVE to watch it. We'd planned to, but we don't HAVE to."

"What? Then why are we even having this argument?"

"Because you wouldn't watch it once you found out that it had gay characters. You wanted to watch it until then."

"Let's just watch it. Okay?"

"Okay."

"You'll have to watch it up here. Jay is watching 'X-Men' with Matt downstairs. You have a DVD in your iMac, right?" Joey said.

"Yea."

"Alright. Have fun," Joey said and left.

"I'm sorry, dude. It's just weird."

"It's just weird 'cause you don't know about it," I said as I went to get out the DVD.

"What's the show about?"

"Gareth saw it when it was on TV. He said there's only one sex scene at the beginning, and you don't really see anything. Um, it was a while ago when he told me about it. I think it's supposed to be some kid that goes to a club and meets some old guy and falls in love with him, but the old guy is a slut and sleeps with everyone and is an asshole, but everyone seems to like him."

"Weird."

"Yea. Gareth said it's not a very good role model type movie, but he liked it," I said and booted up my iMac.

"Have you seen a lot of gay movies?"

"No. Just a couple this summer. Some are really good. There are a lot about kids coming to terms with being gay and what people around them do to them. You've never seen a gay movie, have you?"

"No."

"So you're a gay movie virgin," I smiled.

"Guess I'm losing my virginity tonight, though not how I thought," Adam said and rolled his eyes.

"Don't worry. I won't tease you if you get excited when you see Charlie," I teased.

"Unless he's a she, you won't have to worry."

I moved my iMac to the chair and put it in front of the bed so we could lay on the bed and watch it. I had to put the external speakers on the dresser behind it. I put the movie in, turned off the light and hit 'play'. I gave Adam Jay's pillow to lean against. I put mine behind me and leaned back against the wall. Adam sat next to me, but at least two bodies away. That didn't bother me at all. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable with me and I don't want to feel uncomfortable with him.

I had to hit 'play' again once the menu loaded and then adjusted the sound so it wasn't too loud. I pointed out Charlie when he came on. I had to lean forward when the opening scene came on where you see Nathan and Stuart having sex, and then again when they did it later. OMG! I'm gonna have to wank tonight before I go to bed. I noticed Adam pulled his legs up, but I resisted the urge to tease him about boning up. After that the movie wasn't very sexy, but it was good and we laughed a lot. All sorts of things happening. I could relate a little to Nathan, but not really. I also wanted to punch Stuart and tell Vince to go get a life.

We took a bathroom break after the first disk and got some food. Adam, reluctantly, admitted that the movie wasn't that bad. I put the second disk in and we watched that. Adam fell asleep during it and curled up in a ball on the other side of the bed.

Jay came up to go to bed as the second disk was ending and Dr. Mars was with him.

"Adam's parents called. Wake him up and tell him he needs to go home," Dr. Mars said and then went to bed.

I shook Adam's arm to wake him.

"What were you watching?" Jay asked as he got undressed.

"The movie Charlie gave me for my birthday."

"The Queer as something one?"

"Yea."

"Was it good?"

"Yea. It was weird, but good."

"You're all done?"

"No. One more disk. It'll probably have to wait until another time. Wake up, Adam," I said and shook him.

"Stop," Adam groaned and pulled himself into a tighter ball. Jay took his pillow back.

"Dude-man, you gotta go home. Your parents called. You're late."

Nothing. I shook him again. Nothing. Damn, talk about a solid sleeper. Oh well, I'll just call his folks and tell them he's sleeping here, or find out if they know a way to wake him.

His mom picked up the phone and I explained that he was asleep and I couldn't get him to wake up. She laughed and asked if I'd tried a bomb before saying she understood how he sleeps and that I probably wouldn't be able to get him up and that it was okay for him to stay the night, but to tell him to come home right away in the morning.

"Adam's staying the night," I said as I walked back into my room.

"Where're you gonna sleep?" Jay asked.

"In my bed."

"With Adam?"

"He's in my bed. I'll just sleep in my clothes so he doesn't freak out."

"If he does, I'll back you up," Jay nodded.

"Thanks," I said and rolled my eyes. I put my iMac back on the desk and then pushed Adam so that he was more or less lined up with the bed so I could stretch my legs. It was still warm, so I didn't worry about not being able to get under the blankets. I shut off the light and laid down so I was facing the opposite way as Adam. Hopefully he won't stick his feet in my face. I finally got comfortable and was out.


I rolled over and woke to a foot in my face. Yuck. I pushed his foot away and rolled on my back. I was almost back asleep when I felt Adam sit up quickly.

"What the hell?" Adam said.

"What?" I groaned and looked down at him. He had a look of shock on his face. He noticed my morning wood and then looked back at my face. I noticed his shorts were tented as well. The look of shock on his face was hilarious and pulled the pillow over my face and laughed.

"Dude. What the hell happened?" Adam whispered.

I couldn't resist. "Everything. It was so beautiful," I cooed, and then busted up laughing again.

"What are you laughing at?" Adam said more than a little pissed.

"Your face!"

"Huh?"

"God, do you think I'd actually rape you in your sleep or something?" I teased.

"Why are we sleeping together?"

"'Cause you fell asleep. I tried to wake you to get you to go home, but you wouldn't wake up. Your mom said you better get home in the morning."

Adam glanced at my morning wood again, and then became aware of his and pulled up his legs. I started laughing again.

"What?!"

"Are you that modest?"

"What?"

"You're all embarrassed about morning wood."

"Dude. I don't want to see you with a hard-on."

"Then don't look. I know you're the same way. It doesn't mean I'm hot for you. It's not like I'm gonna ask you to suck me, or ask to suck you... Though I wouldn't say no if you really wanted to suck me," I teased.

"Dude. You're being faggy."

"God, I'm just joking. You're too uptight."

"Well, I'm not an exhibitionist."

"Neither am I. It's kinda something I learned this summer. Not to be ashamed or embarrassed. We're both guys, so it's not like it's something we haven't seen. We are NOT EVER going to have sex."

"Damn straight."

"Are you sure you want to stick with that answer?" I smirked.

"Okay, well, one of us, anyway," Adam groaned and rolled his eyes.

"You know, you wouldn't be so nervous if you'd just relax and treat it like anything else."

"Maybe, but it's not like anything else. I don't normally sleep with gay guys, or wake with their bones in my face."

"In your face? Just what were you doing before I woke up?" I teased.

Adam kicked me off the bed. "Freak."

"You're the one with your face where it doesn't belong," I laughed.

"I gotta piss," Adam said and quickly walked out.

"I'm trying to sleep," Jay whined.

"What? You're trying to sleep?" I said loudly and shook the bunk bed.

"Stop!"

"What? You don't like being rudely woken up?"

"Go 'way," Jay mumbled and pulled the pillow over his head.

I went to the bathroom as soon as Adam got back and then we went down to the kitchen. It was still early and no one else was up yet. I put on a pot of coffee.

"Dude. What's with the coffee?"

"Huh?"

"You always have coffee in the morning."

"Yea. I like it."

"Why?"

I shrugged. "Just do. Got used to it when I was in New York."

"Did you do everything in New York? Did you even exist before that?" Adam teased.

"Yea, dorkus. It's just that I did a lot of things differently in New York than I'd done before. I guess I changed a lot. Even my mom said so."

"Why? I mean, what was so special about your time in New York?"

"A lot of things. A lot of things happened. Everyone helped me learn to just be me. I don't know. It's just like I grew up or something while I was there."

"Don't tell me you acted like Jay before you went," Adam teased.

"No way. I've never been that hyper. So do you want some coffee or not?" I asked as I got down a cup for myself.

"Yea, I guess. With lots of milk and sugar."

"You can put those in yourself," I said and poured our cups.

"So what were you like, then?"

"I was a little more shy..."

"You mean you haven't always just walked up to people and started a conversation?" Adam interrupted.

"Yea, I guess I've always done that. I'm not really shy, but I was more nervous about it before. I was also a bit of a dorkus after I came out."

"How's that?"

"I started acting really camp. My family didn't take it very well, so I acted that way to embarrass them. It mostly backfired. I was okay with being gay with myself, but not with being around other people. I'm more relaxed now," I said and then chuckled when I remembered something.

"What's so funny?"

"I just remembered how I was when I first got to Jonah's place. I was being so over the top camp 'cause I was totally pissed at Tommy and had just spent twelve hours in the car with him. Anyway, it totally pissed Jonah off. He got me alone and was, like, 'Okay, now it's just us fags. What the hell is up with the queen act?' Oh man, he totally went off on me."

"I would have punched him."

"Yea right. He could kick your ass. He used to always win when he and Tommy got in a fight. Anyway, it hurt when he yelled at me 'cause I figured at least he would understand. We had a good talk the next morning and it got better from there."

"So Jonah is like your gay mentor or something?"

"Um, I guess. I don't really think of him like that, but I guess that's an okay way of putting it. What about you?"

"I don't have a gay mentor," Adam smirked.

"Dorkus. What were you like back in San Diego?"

"The same way I am now."

"You haven't changed at all?"

"Well, yea, I guess. I guess I'm doing more now. We lived in this suburb that was totally far away from anything and everyone. I already told you that only old people lived near us. The only place I could go without having Mom or Dad drive me was the beach. All my friends thought it was so cool that I lived so close, but I would have rather lived near people."

"What about your friends there? Have you talked to them?"

"Um, not really."

"Why not?"

"Just no one I was really that close to. I mean, I was a year younger than everyone else in my class and smarter than some of them, so they mostly ignored me. Most of my friends were people at the beach, but beach people are friends with anyone there. I doubt they even notice when someone isn't. I knew a lot of people, but I wasn't really tight with anyone."

"Why a year younger? How old are you?"

"I just turned 15 before we moved. I skipped fourth grade."

"Then why are you complaining all the time about the homework if you're a brainiac?" I teased.

"Dude. Don't call me that," Adam said seriously.

"Sorry."

"I still have to work hard. I'm just really good at math."

"I'm horrible at math. I barely scraped by with a 'B' in Algebra last year."

"That's not that bad. At least not as bad as my English. I got a 'C+'. It was all grammar stuff and writing generic essays. It so totally doesn't make any sense."

"Math is what doesn't make sense. Writing is easy."

"Not for me. I better get home. I'm probably gonna get grounded."

"Okay. Well, see you in school, at least," I smiled.

"Later, dude," Adam said and left.

I finished my coffee and decided I wanted to go running. I went upstairs to change.

"Where are you going?" Jay asked as he got back from the bathroom.

"Running."

"With Adam?"

"No. He had to go home."

"Could I go with you?"

"Why?"

"'Cause I think I'm gonna try out for Track this year."

"Okay. If you think you can keep up," I teased.

"I'll leave you in the dust," Jay boasted as he got dressed.

"Is that the cloud of dust when you collapse on the ground?" I teased back.

Dr. Mars was up when we got downstairs.

"We're gonna go running," I told him.

"Where to?"

"Probably to the university and back."

"That's a long way," Jay said.

"It's only four miles."

"Each way," Dr. Mars added.

"What's the matter? Getting cold feet?" I teased Jay.

"What? No. If you can do it, I can do it."

"I'm not gonna carry you if you get tired."

"Well, I'm not gonna carry you, either."

Dr. Mars just smiled.

"Alright then. Let's go," I said and went outside to stretch.

After we warmed up I started towards the university. Jay started running as fast as he could.

"That's not very smart," I yelled to him.

"I'm faster than you are."

"Can you keep that pace for eight miles?"

"Fine. I'll slow down for you."

"Dorkus," I muttered as I caught up to him. We jogged side by side, though he had to take a step-and-a-half for every one of mine. We got some water at one of the university buildings before heading back. The last half-mile I picked up the pace and was at a full run. I totally left Jay behind and he yelled for me to slow down. I kept going. I was stretching and almost cooled off when he finally there.

"That wasn't cool," Jay panted.

"I thought you were faster?"

"I was. I was tired."

"That's why you save your energy at the beginning so you can run full out at the end. Always push the last bit."

"I was," Jay whined and dropped down on the grass.

"Get up and walk around."

"I'm tired."

"So? You're gonna cramp up if you don't cool down. Just walk around and stretch. You're gonna be hurtin' if you don't."

"Yea, okay," Jay said and got up.

I went inside to take a shower, and then had breakfast. I had homework to finish and spent a couple hours doing that before getting online. I changed my nick' first. Thankfully, Gareth was on.

+++ Gareth & Jonny chat +++

iamjam: hey

gareth85: hey

iamjam: it's me. jonny. new nick'

gareth85: oh, hey. iamjam? oh, i get it.

iamjam: what's happening? where were u yesterday?

gareth85: had a date. :-D

iamjam: really?!?!?

gareth85: yea, dorkus. don't make me sound desirable or something.

iamjam: u know i love u

gareth85: thanks

iamjam: so? details...

gareth85: his name is thomas. he's french.

iamjam: is french, or u did french? ;-P

gareth85: IS. we didn't do that...yet...

iamjam: and?

gareth85: he lives in cardiff and his dad works on a ferry.

iamjam: french living in uk?

gareth85: yea. we saw 'hedwig & the angry inch'. it was great. michael is in it. have u seen it yet?

iamjam: nope. haven't had time. i'll have to see if it's playing here.

gareth85: if it's playing in cardiff it's playing there.

iamjam: maybe. finally saw 'queer as folk' last night.

gareth85: and?

iamjam: it was cool. just how u said.

gareth85: so what's keeping u so busy?

iamjam: school. adam & i auditioned for 'west side story'

gareth85: drama queen ;-)

iamjam: :-P

gareth85: did you make it?

iamjam: don't know yet. callbacks are tomorrow. will know by wednesday.

gareth85: how's adam turning out?

iamjam: cool. we had a fight last night cause he didn't want to watch a gay movie, but he cooled off. fell asleep in my bed and stayed the night.

gareth85: way to go!

iamjam: ick. no. woke to his feet in my face. we were both fully clothed.

gareth85: too bad.

iamjam: nope. not gonna do that with a straight guy. don't even want to. our friendship is going too well.

gareth85: i understand.

iamjam: so what else did u do on your date?

gareth85: just got some fish & chips after and talked.

iamjam: you have a pic? is he cute?

gareth85: i think so, but you probably won't.

iamjam: send it.

gareth85: get it? so?

iamjam: him?

gareth85: i like him. he's cool. has a killer kit. debian, unfortunately. i'm still working on getting him to switch to freebsd.

iamjam: oh no! another computer geek! ;-)

gareth85: :-P

iamjam: at least you found someone.

gareth85: you will. chicago is bigger. more people.

iamjam: i know. takes time. sighs

gareth85: moving on. how's school this year?

iamjam: better. cool.

++++++

We chatted for another half-hour until Jay came to get me for dinner.


Almost everyone who auditioned was called back, so it wasn't that big a deal. You had to have sucked really bad not to be called back. The callbacks took forever and were totally boring. Most of the time I was sitting down watching, or just standing on stage.

The cast list was posted Wednesday morning. Adam and I caught the early train 'cause we were anxious to see if we made it or not. We both got parts. I was Snowboy and Adam was Chino.

"Chino? That's a big part," Adam gulped.

"That's a great part. You get to shoot Tony at the end. It's a bigger part than I got."

"Dude. I only wanted a chorus part. Something in the background. Now I'm gonna be up front."

"Cool."

"No, dude. Not cool. I'll freeze up. I'll totally choke and get sick."

"No, you won't. You'll be great. You thought you'd get sick for auditions and you didn't and did great."

"Yea, but there wasn't an audience."

"Not if you don't count the sixty guys and twenty-five girls who were also auditioning."

"Maybe I'll..."

"Don't even think about dropping out," I interrupted.

"Dude..."

"No. Don't even think it. You're gonna do great, and it'll be like conquering a fear or something."

"So?" Chris asked excitedly as he ran up to the list. "Riff! Yes!" He said and did a little happy dance.

"Congrats," I said and laughed at his happy dance. Adam did, too.

Chris checked the list again. "Coolness. You guys got parts, too. Hey, congrats Snowboy and Chino. You do realize that you're the enemy now, don't you?" He teased Adam.

"Bite me," Adam smiled.

"That's the spirit," Chris laughed.

A bunch of other people got there to check the list and the hallway got really loud with people cheering or complaining.


Comments welcome and encouraged. jm_stories@yahoo.com

Next: Chapter 15


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