Happy New Years to all of you who are reading and enjoying this tale. Thanks to all of you who have written and said such nice things. May the new year be all you wish it to to be!
Josh's Journey: Making the Pieces Fit
Waking up in an unfamiliar bed was a new experience for me. Those rare times I had actually gone to bed with a guy I always went home afterwards. This time though, it was different. I felt like I WAS home. Rising up on one elbow, I looked around. It was still dark outside but there was a light on in the hallway just outside the bedroom. I didn't remember it being on earlier, but I had had other things on my mind at the time.
A quick glance at the clock on the bedside table told me it was 5:30 am. My usual waking up time. I sat up, careful not to disturb Kel, who was sleeping curled up against my side. He looked very young, his hair pushed back and his face relaxed deep in sleep. At some point in the night he had acquired a pair of pyjama bottoms. I eased out of the bed. My foot touched something furry on the floor. Crystal raised her head. I stepped over her and walked to the door. A snap of my fingers and she was right beside me. Tova stood up and shook then followed us down the hall to the kitchen. Both canines went outside while I searched the cupboards to find coffee.
After getting the coffee pot going, I returned to the bedroom and pulled on my jeans and shirt from last night, then went outside to my car. The morning air was chilly on my bare feet and chest but I wasn't noticing anything so ordinary on such a fine morning! The gym bag I had forgotten to take in on Monday was on the back seat. In it were jeans and a t-shirt and the clean socks I hadn't put on Monday. Together with the underwear Kel had washed the day before, I was set for work. My work boots were in the trunk. I would put them on at work. I carried the clothes inside, let the canines in and went to the bathroom to cleaned up and get dressed.
By the time I returned to the kitchen , Kel was leaning against the cabinet by the stove drinking a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. He had on a pair of jeans, with a hole in the knee, tightly belted around his narrow waist. His chest was bare and I swallowed at the sight of the scars and washboard ribs again.
"Good Morning," he said looking up.
"Good Morning to you too. I didn't wake you, did I?" I kissed him softly.
"I am an incredibly light sleeper." He answered. "Besides two large critters bouncing around your room is not something easily slept through!"
I smiled. "No, I guess not."
Kel put the paper down and turned around to the cupboard behind his head. He opened it and picked up a mug that said 'Writers do it in between the lines' on the side. He poured me a cup.
"Don't fill it all the way." I said. He looked an me enquiringly. "I like a LOT of milk in my coffee, but no sugar."
Kel nodded and handed me the mug. I got the milk out of the fridge.
"I suppose it IS reasonable that one of the first things you learn about a lover is how they like their coffee." He grinned. "Breakfast?"
I grimaced and shook my head.
"I can't eat in the morning. I never have. Mom says that even as a baby I wouldn't nurse until I had been up for a couple of hours. Jem is/was the same way. And Dad also. Its a Sanclere thing, Mom says. So what's on your docket for today?" I asked watching him over the rim of the cup.
He shook his hair back. "I have an appointment with my psychiatrist today. Its been a week since I saw her."
My stomach clenched at the word 'psychiatrist' but Kel seemed pretty casual. I guess for him a psychiatrist appointment was perfectly ordinary!
"That's this afternoon, this morning I better get onto the proofs of my new book. I don't want my editor to hunt me down and stab me to death with her blue pencil." He grinned his eyes dancing mischievously.
"But I really like this psychiatrist." He went on. "I have only been going to her for about a year now. She's so much easier to talk to than the last one." He made a face. "I get the feeling she's really listening and caring about what I am sayi...Josh, are you okay? You look a little green." He grabbed my arm.
I looked up to the ceiling and shook my head slightly.
"Sorry." I said. "I'm okay. I just felt a little lightheaded for a minute."
Kel grinned. "Maybe you're pregnant." I squeaked a protest. He laughed.
"It IS an awful lot to take in all at once. Dr. Reicher is the 8th or 9th psychiatrist I've been to in my life." He sipped his coffee. "She's young, cute and I enjoy looking at her legs." He grinned. "But she's brilliant. Really knows what she's talking about and more importantly she 'connects' with me unlike some I have dealt with. Lets me pace all over the office while I talk. Dropped everything and came running when the hospital called her to say I'd been admitted."
"Tomorrow morning I have to see my GP." He continued. "I know he'll nag me about my weight, my blood pressure, my eating habits same story new day."
"Your blood pressure?" I asked puzzled.
"Its chronically low.. dangerously low on occasion. Another reason I eat a lot of salty things. Being underweight aggravates it."
I stared into my cup. So many things.. so many problems.. could I handle them all?
"I think I need to discuss some of this with someone. Someone professional." I said softly.
Kel nodded. "I can understand that. Let me talk to Dr. Reicher. Maybe she'd be willing to talk with you. Or she can recommend someone."
I set my mug down on the counter and gathered Kel into my arms. He wrapped his arms around my waist and laid his head against my chest.
"I can handle it, Kel. I know I can. But it would be so much easier if I knew HOW to handle things ahead of time." I made a face. "I don't think I am expressing myself very well this morning."
"I understand." Kel said against my chest.
He looked up at me. "I will also understand if you decide I am more trouble than I am worth."
"NO!" I said sharply. "Don't say that!" I cradled his face in my hands. "Kel, you are the one I have been waiting my whole life for. I know that sounds corny but I know you`re the 'one'. I can feel it in my bones."
I kissed him, a long, slow kiss. Kel leaned against me. I could feel his heart beating. My hands stroked his back; squeezed his butt, what little there was to squeeze. He squirmed and grinned at me.
I glanced at my watch.
"Crud, I gotta be going. Kel, do you mind if I leave Crystal here? I hadn't thought this all the way through when I brought her. I dont have time to take her home and Id hate to make her stay in the car all day." I smiled. "Really I hadn't expected to stay the night."
" I'm glad you did." Kel smiled. "Nah, don't worry about Crystal. She can stay here. Besides it will be an excuse for you to come back tonight."
He looked sideways, then up at me. His sweet mouth curled up into a wicked grin.
"Tova and I may just hold her captive here... only give you visiting rights."
I laughed and kissed him again.
"Oh and do you have by chance a thermos I can borrow. To carry coffee to work in. I forgot mine and well..I didn't expect to need it." I finished lamely.
Kel grinned. He started to rummage through the kitchen cabinets. Finally he found in a cupboard under the counter what he was looking for: a brown plastic thermos. He gave it a quick cleaning and filled it two thirds of the way with coffee, then handed it to me. I took it and poured some milk in, screwed on the lid and kissed him again. I gave him a hasty thanks and ran out the door. On my way out I told Crystal to stay and to be good.
Somehow I made it to work on time. Sam was waiting for me. He took one look at me and broke into a grin.
"I don't even have to ask if it worked," He said. "I can see it did!" He pointed to his neck, I flushed and busied myself with putting on my boots. He laughed. I stood up stamping my feet. He threw his arm around my shoulders and we went in together.
I must have needed the night before, because I worked more smoothly and quickly than I had for several weeks. I was at the top of my game as the saying goes. Several guys noticed the hickey on my neck and whistled. A couple teased me about losing a fight with the vacuum cleaner. I simply looked them up and then down and told them well at least I cleaned. That made for more laughter.
Lunch was a burger with Sam. He asked me about Kel and what happened the night before, sparing of course the personal details dealing with the acquisition of my hickey. I explained some about Kel's problems without going into too much depth, particularly about his abusive childhood.
"Sounds like a relationship that is going to take a lot of work, Josh." He said. "Are you sure you're up to it?"
"Yes." I said. "I know its going to take work, I've never been afraid of work. I grew up getting up at dawn and shoveling manure and feeding 100 horses before school, not by myself, of course. What's a little mental illness against a umm.." I grinned. "A crapload of horse manure?"
Sam roared. "Long as you keep your sense of humor, boyo."
Sam's face suddenly became very solemn. He looked at me closely and started talking, his voice soft and paternal.
"But seriously, I know absolutely NOTHING about mental illness, but I do know that this is one situation where you HAVE got to be totally committed." I started to speak but he held his hand up. "I know you've slept with him and your hormones are goin nuts, but if you aren't ready to make a total commitment kiss him and say goodbye."
I blushed and looked at the table. After a minute I looked up.
"Thanks Sam. You sound like my Mom. I hear you, and I have thought a lot about what you just said. I AM ready to commit to Kel. I'd damn well marry him tomorrow if I could. He's the 'one'. I know it. I can feel it."
Sam nodded. I went on speaking, feeling some of the tension in me flow out. It felt so good to confide in someone.
"Nothing worth having is easy to acquire, my Dad says." I went on. "And maybe deep inside me I 'need' to be needed by someone. Mom says I am a born nurturer. Maybe I need Kel as much as he needs me. I admit I'm afraid, but I think I'm more afraid of being without him than of what might happen being with him."
Sam reached over and squeezed my shoulder.
"You're an amazing kid, Josh. I don't think I could have been so responsible at your age."
"Thanks, Sam."
We finished eating and returned to work. The rest of the afternoon passed smoothly and by quitting time I was eager to get back to Kel. But when I got out to my car, Mitch was leaning against it.
"Mitch! What are you doing here?" I asked surprised.
"Checkin up on you. What did you expect.. you didn't come home last night." He answered. "I was worried."
"I left a note telling you I was going to Kel's. It had his number on it. You could have called."
"I've tried! ALL DAMNED MORNING I HAVE TRIED!" He shouted. "But there's no answer."
"I'm sorry, Mitch. Kel probably didn't hear it this morning and he had an appointment this afternoon." I tried to hug Mitch, but he shrugged me off. "Mitch, don't. How many times do you go off and not come home?"
"That's different." He said.
"Oh? How so? Because you're a bad boy, and that's what bad boys do? Or is it just okay when you do it, but I am expected to always be there waiting for you!" I was almost yelling now.
"Josh, you're my best friend. But you're never around anymore!"
"I have a job, we're not children anymore, Mitch. And I have a lover now." His eyes focused on my neck..
"So I see. Jeez, Josh." He turned and stomped off up the street. I started to follow but decided the heck with it. I'd deal with him when he sobered up and calmed down.
"Cripes, Josh. Is this going to be a daily thing?" I turned to one of my coworkers. "'Cause if it is I need to start bringing popcorn." He grinned. I opened my mouth to yell at him but his face was so innocent looking I burst out laughing.
"Tell you what Manny, the way its looking you sell that popcorn and we'll both be rich!" He laughed and slapped me on the shoulder before walking on up the street to his car.
"Think he'll be okay, Josh?" Sam asked.
"Yeah, he'll calm down and be all apologies. I probably should have called him last night. I ummm... didn't think about it."
Sam chuckled. "All right then. See you in the mornin. Call if you need me."
"Thanks Sam."
I drove slowly up the street looking for Mitch but he was no where to be seen. I suspected he had had someone waiting for him. I sighed and turned toward Kel's. As I drove I thought some more about all that I had learned so far from Kel. I was certain there was more, but what he had told me so far must have required a great deal of trust on his part. I would have to prove myself for whatever else there was to tell.
I thought about Kel. The way his luscious mouth curled up into a smile. His eyes that seemed to glow when he was excited. His pretty face, especially when that face was close to mine. His way of moving like he had joints where the rest of us have straight bones. And how warm and alive he felt in my arms.
Alive. Yes, I shuddered thinking about how close we had come to missing each other. I thought some more about what Sam and I had been discussing. I DID need Kel. I wanted or maybe needed to be the thing he leaned on, the person he counted on to love him in spite of everything, the person to make everything all right. "A fairy tale," I thought with a snort of laughter.
The way to Kel's had become almost as familiar to me as the way to my own apartment. I pulled into the driveway with that 'put my feet up and veg all night' feeling. I was home. It wasn't quite the ready-to-pack-up-my-stuff-and-move-in feeling but the at-home feeling you get at a best friend's house. I walked up to the house and opened the door cautiously. There was no movement inside. I walked back to the kitchen. No one was there and I could see no one in the backyard. I checked Kel's room. Empty, but much cleaner than I remembered it. The bathroom was also empty. Irrationally, I was starting to panic. Where was Kel? Where was Crystal? Tova? What if something had happened? Or Kel... I couldn't finish the thought.
I bolted for the stairs and went down them in three leaps. Tova burst out of Kel's den growling. His teeth were bared and for a moment I thought he was going to attack. I backed up to the bottom step. But he must have caught my scent because he stopped growling and wagged his tail. Crystal was right behind him, her ears back and her hackles raised. When she spotted me she barked and jumped up on me almost knocking me over. I hugged her and told her what a good girl she was.
Kel appeared in the doorway. A pencil in one hand and sheet of paper in the other. He looked at me puzzled.
"Josh, what on Earth? Did you fall down the stairs?"
"No." I answered. "I jumped down them."
"Why? Or is that one of your little quirks I will just have to get used to?" He grinned at me. I wrapped my arms around him. "Hey! Watch the paper.. that's money there."
He twisted his arms loose and wrapped them around my neck. I buried my face in his hair, barely noticing that it had been cut and wasn't quite as wild as usual.
"I'm an idiot." I murmured into his hair. "I couldn't find you upstairs and I forgot that you said you spend most of your time down here. I panicked... I was afraid..." I swallowed.
Kel stroked my hair. "Afraid of what?"
I raised my head and looked at him. " I don't know. I was just afraid... and the dogs.. and I'm stupid."
"Nah, you're not stupid." Kel tucked his pencil into his jeans pocket. He laid his hand on my cheek. "You're just new to a situation that has a lot of uncertainty in it. And in a weird sort of way, I am flattered that you got that upset so fast."
My hands stroked his back. Kel grasped my head and pulled it up to his lips. We kissed. A long passionate kiss. Kel's tongue flicked lightly across my lips. I opened my mouth letting him in. His tongue wrapped around my tongue. He caressed my tongue with his. I moaned and pulled him deeper into my mouth. He let go of my tongue and nibbled on my lower lip. My lips slid along his jaw, my tongue teasing the tender skin. Kel shivered.
"Josh." He whispered.
I ran my hands up his arms and neck to cradle his head. Then buried my head in the curve of his neck. Exploring with lips, teeth and tongue. Kel flinched. My eyes opened and my head yanked backwards. His left shoulder had several blue bruises across it.
"HOLY--" I yelled. "Where the hell did those come from!" I yanked his shirt over his head. I dropped the shirt and knotted my hands into fists. Kel grabbed my hands.
"JOSH!" He held my fists between his two hands. "Josh, please. Stop. I had forgot about them."
"Forgot!"
Kel nodded. He let go of my hands and reached up to grab my head. He pulled my head down to his shoulder. I pulled him close to me.
"Josh, my beautiful avenging angel." He kissed my cheek. "You did it."
I jerked upright. "I NEVER!" I yelled.
Kel flinched again. There were tears in his eyes.
"Last night you did. I asked Dr Reicher what she thought. Her feeling is that since I am so thin there wasn't enough padding when you grabbed me during sex last night. It left bruises.. this morning when you left they weren't visible yet. By the time I started to get ready to go to the doctor's I could see them."
His lower lip trembled. There were tears streaming down his face.
"Josh. Please, don't yell. It scares me. I have the urge to run away when I hear yelling. It`s one of the remnants of my childhood."
"God" I moaned. I dropped to my knees and wrapped my arms around his waist. I laid my head against his chest. I could feel his ribs against my cheek. And his soft chest hair. And hear his heart pounding. Tears ran down my cheeks smearing against his skin. He ran his fingers through my thick hair.
"Kel." I whispered.
"Shhh," he answered. He tucked the hair behind my ear. His finger traced the outside of my ear. "You didn't mean to, Josh. That's the thing. I have taken a lot of bruises in my life but you didn't mean to do it. Dr. Reicher thinks I should check with Dr Gower, my GP,.. make sure I am not vitamin deficient or have some kind of problem that would make me bruise easily.."
"I promised you I would never hurt you.. never let anyone else hurt you. Kel."
"You didn't hurt me. I hadn't really noticed them until now. I'm okay, Josh." He stroked my hair some more. "I am not a porcelain doll, Josh. I won't break or come apart at the seams from a couple of bruises. If that were true I'd have broken to bits years ago."
I lurched to my feet. "I gotta go. I can't stay .. I can't think.. I need to think."
I turned and stumbled up the stairs to the front door. Crystal hard at my heels.
"Josh!" I heard Kel shout behind me.
I yanked the door open and stumbled down the stairs. Crystal followed. I pulled the door shut before Tova could get out. At the sidewalk I started running, my bare feet slapping the ground. Crystal ran along beside me.
I am a physical activity kind of guy. When I get upset I do things. Now I ran and as I ran I thought. I thought about Kel. How could I have hurt him? I had promised him NO one would ever hurt him, including me. I ran until my feet started to hurt. Then I ran some more. Maybe if I could have run to Alberta I would have. Every slap of my feet on the pavement seemed to say "hurt Kel, hurt Kel" and I continued to run. I remembered grabbing Kel by the shoulders the night before, but in no way had I ever suspected it would leave bruises.
Was I trying to punish myself? To make myself hurt? I didn't know. I did know one thing, I wasn't running away from Kel. I'd never do that. So much evil had been done to Kel already in his life. By his father, by other lovers.. by the demons in his own head. How could I have added to it? Why couldn't I have been gentler?
"I am not a porcelain doll, Josh. I won't break or come apart at the seams from a couple of bruises. If that were true I'd have broken to bits years ago" echoed through my head.
"I won't break.."
"I've taken a lot of bruises in my life.."
"You didn't mean to.. you didn't mean to... didn't mean..."
My head was ringing. Fear, anger and frustration rolled through me in succeeding waves. I panted for breath. My feet burned each time they hit the ground. There was a convenience store on the corner with a small triangle of grass out front. I stepped onto the grass cool, soothing relief flooding through my feet. I leaned forward, my hands on my knees. Crystal nosed me worried. I sat down and looked at the bottoms of my feet. The left one was raw, the right one bleeding. I swallowed.
"This isn't about ME," I thought, the pain in my feet sharpening my focus. "Its about Kel."
With that insight my mind cleared. It was pure arrogance on my part to think I was so perfect that I would never hurt Kel. That I would be the ONE person who never scared him, who never bruised his delicate body, who always acted completely perfect! I was angry at myself. Angry for hurting him but angrier for all the yelling I had done. I had scared him, and that hurt was far worse, perhaps, than physical hurt. I had always been the protector, the nurturer, the big brother. Now I wanted to be a partner, an equal in the relationship. I would always be Kel's protector, even his shield if he wished it of me. But more importantly I wanted to be his soul mate.
"I'd damn well marry him tomorrow if I could. He's the 'one'. I know it. I can feel it." I had told Sam. I still meant it. If anything I meant it even more now.
I stood up unsteadily and looked around. I had no idea where I was or how to get back to Kel's. I hobbled up to the convenience store, Crystal following. A broad smile at the young woman behind the counter and I had change for the 20 in my wallet. I bought a liter of water and went outside. Crystal eagerly lapped at the water I poured in my hand.
"Here, this will work better." I looked up surprised. The woman from inside was standing in the doorway. She handed me one of those cardboard boats for hot dogs. She was good looking blonde with a generous mouth turned up in an easy smile.
"I don't think it will leak too much before she drinks all the water." She said. "Your dog is a she?"
I nodded. jeez
"She's a beauty." The woman stepped outside. She looked us both over. What did she see? A tall, Indian male, about her own age, in a ragged pair of jeans and a t-shirt with a rip across the belly and a shiny golden retriever?
You're bleeding!" She gasped. I looked down. My right foot had left a bloody footprint on the sidewalk. She ran back inside and returned a minute later with a roll of paper towels and a mug of water. She ripped off several towels and handed them to me. I pressed them against my foot. She cleaned the blood off the sidewalk.
"I can do that," I said. Taking the towels from her. "I must have stepped on something. I`ll call and get a ride home."
I finished cleaning up the blood and made sure everything was in the garbage. Crystal had finished her water. I took a long drink of the water myself.
"Thank you." I said to the woman. "I appreciate your help."
She smiled.
"I guess since I don't know the way back, I better call Kel and have him come get me."
She asked what his address was and I told her. I told her I had been out running and got lost.
"WOW!" That's over five miles away and you ran it? No wonder you're feet are raw. Running barefoot?"
I looked away. "We had an argument, Kel and I." I shrugged. "Thank you again for your help."
I hobbled across the parking lot to the pay phone and dialed Kel's number. He picked up on the first ring.
"Josh!?" He sounded liked he'd been crying.
"Kel, I.. I.. " I swallowed and started again. "Kel, I'm lost."
"No, you're just trying to be a man in a very difficult situation." He said softly.
"Yes." I paused. "Kel, I AM lost. Literally. I don't know how to get back to your house."
A staccato of laughter rolled through the phone.
"Okay, tell me where you are." He said after a couple minutes. I told him. "Not the best neighborhood. How on Earth did you get there?"
"I ran." I said. "Kel, my foot is bleeding."
"I'll be there in a few minutes." He answered.
I hung up the phone and sat on the grass by it. I was anxious to see Kel. To hold him. To talk to him. It wasn't very long before a silver 1969 Cougar pulled into the lot and rolled to a stop in front of me. Kel bounded out of the driver's seat. He literally ran the three or four feet to me.
"Josh." he said. I wrapped my arms around his waist and laid my head against his chest. His heart was pounding frantically. "Come on. Get in the car, I have a first aid kit in there."
He helped me up. Kel wrapped his arm around my waist, I leaned on him and limped around to the other side of the car. Crystal bounced along beside us. Kel opened the back door and she climbed right in. He opened the front door. I limped over and sat down. Kel reached past me and grabbed a small gray tackle box off the floor. He set it on the ground and opened it. He picked up my foot and winced.
"When's the last time you had a tetanus shot?" He asked.
"Last year, when I cut my thumb at work." I replied.
"You should be okay then."
I handed him the end of the water in my bottle. He poured it on a gauze pad and washed my foot. I flinched in pain and Kel made a soft soothing noise. He cleaned my foot and smeared some antibiotic cream on it. Kel's hands were gentle and loving as he wrapped my foot in gauze, then slid a sock over the bandage. He moved on to the other foot.
I glanced up at the convenience store. The woman was standing in the doorway. I smiled and waved. She smiled and waved back. My left hand rested on Kel's shoulder kneading it softly. Kel finished my foot and straightened up. He studied me intently.
"You didn't need to go out and rip yourself to pieces just to punish yourself."
I swallowed and nodded. Kel cradled my head in his hands and kissed me.
"But I appreciate the effort anyway." He whispered with a mischievous grin. I chuckled.
I twisted around into the seat. Kel shut the door. Crystal leaned over the back of the seat and licked my face. I rubbed her ears. Kel climbed in the driver side. I hooked my seatbelt as did Kel. The drive to Kel's was quiet, neither of us needing to talk. Kel pulled into the driveway and parked beside my car.
"Good thing you didn't park in front the garage or your lady would have had to run back home. You must have the keys to your car with you." He said. I nodded, they were in my pocket.
"I'll get a key made for you tomorrow."
Kel got out of the car and came around to help me out. I reached back and let Crystal out. She leaped out and ran around the yard checking out every smell. From the house I could hear Tova howl.
"He missed her." Kel said softly as he helped me out of the car. "He would run to the front windows, then back to me, then to the windows."
"I'm sorry." I said.
Kel shrugged. "You needed to think.. I can understand that."
"No." I said. "I was wrong, I hurt you far worse yelling at you. I promised not to hurt you and here I might just as well have smacked you physically. I didn't grasp that. There is pain and there is the kind of pain I inflicted on you from yelling. I will remember it."
Kel hugged me. "Josh, I'll help you understand. I want you here with me so bad!"
I leaned on him and we walked into the house. Each step sent shockwaves of pain through my feet and up my calves. But inside on the carpet it was a lot less painful to walk. I sighed and hugged Kel closer to me. He steered me down the hall. I had to make a detour into the bathroom, but I was so glad to sink down onto the bed. I was tired. And sore. My eyes shut of their own will. Kel kissed my forehead. I was asleep.
I awoke to the feeling of a warm body snuggling down beside me. It was dark outside the windows. I sat up abruptly.
"Shh.." A hand was on my arm. "Lie down. Unless you're hungry?"
The light in the hallway was on again. I looked down. My eyes adjusted to the half light. Kel was lying on his side beside me. It was his hand lying on my arm. I slid back down in the bed and pulled him into my arms. He snuggled up and put his arm around my neck. I could feel his fingers combing my hair.
"You're very lucky, you know." He said softly.
"Yes, I am. I have you." I answered.
Kel chuckled. " I called Sam."
"HOW?" I said in surprise.
Kel rolled his eyes. "Jeez Josh, telepathy. How do you think? I called Mitch and asked for the number."
"Mitch? Crap, he was mad at me."
"So I gathered. I apologized to him for not answering the phone earlier. I had it turned off downstairs so I could work. He says call him tomorrow. He's feeling rotten about the scene he made today."
I caressed Kel's back. "Okay." He went on talking.
"Mitch gave me Sam's number. I called him and had a long chat with him." I groaned. Kel laughed. "He cares a lot about you. He was on his way out here, but I told him you were asleep. I would expect him here tomorrow though. He's going to call your chief and get you off work the rest of this week. "
I started to protest but Kel put his fingers on my mouth. His fingers so close were suddenly exciting and I was getting hard.
"Oh hush, you can't stand all day on those feet. Sam thinks you need to go to a doctor and so do I. And dont say you cant afford it. I CAN."
"Yes, Momma." I said meekly.
Kel laughed low and sensual. I opened my mouth and sucked in his fingertips. I flicked my tongue across them and sucked them fiercely. Kel shuddered and moaned.
"Josh... your feet.. Ahhh!" He moaned.
I tried to talk with his fingers in my mouth. It came out "ib moof oo ah urk nof mf coff" We both laughed. I pulled him closer and rolled onto my back. Kel planted both his palms on my shoulders and sat up.
"Once more in English, please." He grinned at me.
"I said `its my feet who were hurt not my cock'." I pulled his head down to my mouth.
Kel's lips were soft and warm and sweet as honey. I nibbled his lower lip, then his upper one. He opened his mouth. I ran my tongue across the inner side of his lips. The twin sensations of soft and hard were making me terribly excited. Kel moaned softly into my mouth. I pushed past his teeth, his incisors sending out little frissons of pleasure as they scraped across my tongue. His tongue wrapped around mine. Coiling, twisting, caressing. I twisted my head and pushed deeper into his mouth. I wanted to fall into him.
I stroked his back, working his shirt up and off. His bony back with the criss-crossed scars felt so incredibly fragile under my fingers. I stroked my fingers up and down barely touching the skin. Goosebumps erupted under my fingers. Kel squirmed and moaned. He pushed deeper into my mouth. I pulled his head closer, holding him secure for a minute before going back to teasing his back.
I rolled Kel over onto his back, careful to support my weight. He lay still looking up at me. His eyes glowing and his lips slightly parted. He reached up and tucked my hair behind my ears. I twisted my head and kissed him on the wrist. I ran the tip of my tongue along the edges of the ugly, red scars. Kel whimpered.
"Josh."
"Shh.. its part of you. Its you I want, you I love. All of you."
Tears sprang up in Kel's eyes. I leaned down and wiped them away with the tip of my tongue. Softly I dropped light kisses across his cheek to his neck. And down his neck to the hollow of his collarbone. I brushed my tongue lightly across the bruises. I couldn't promise never to leave bruises but I would try my damndest never to do it again! Kel made a strangled noise deep in his throat. I ran my tongue along his collarbone and sucked on his shoulder joint. He groaned and his hand tightened in my hair. He pulled my head back to his mouth.
For a long time, I drowned in the sensations of his tongue on mine. All I knew was his mouth, all I felt was his mouth. But gradually I became aware of his hard cock pressing on my hip. I raised my head and body. Kel pulled my t-shirt over my head. He ran his hands down over my chest and belly. My head fell back and I groaned in pleasure.
Kel pinched my nipples and my body exploded in pleasure. H pulled me down and his mouth attached to one. My body shuddered, fire roaring out to every corner.
"Kel," I groaned
Kel sucked first one then the other nipple. Fire and ice raced through my body. I shook and groaned. His legs wrapped around my waist. I cried out. My arms shook. I pulled back and my nipple slid out of Kel's mouth., his teeth nearly pushing me over the edge.
"Ohh God, you keep that up and I'll cum." I groaned. Kel grinned at me and licked his lips.
I buried my face in his hair. It was so soft and fresh smelling. I kissed and licked all the way down his neck. I ran my tongue across his upper ribs and down through the soft hair to his nipples. Teasing first one then the other, he groaned and thrashed under me, his hands clenching and unclenching on my shoulders. He moaned and whispered my name.
I tickled his abs and ribs with my tongue. Kel squirmed. At his pyjama bottoms I stopped and looked up. Kel's eyes were half closed. He was breathing softly through his mouth, his chest raising and falling in rhythm. I leaned back down and ran my nose lightly across the skin above his waistband. He moaned. I twisted my tongue around a soft curl of pubic hair and pulled it gently. His hips jerked in pleasure.
I sat up and slipped my hands under the elastic waistband. He raised his butt and seemed to almost glide out of the pyjama bottoms. I held them up and looked at them.
"Mickey Mouse?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.
Kel grinned. "Christmas from my step brother, Kevin."
I laughed and dropped them on the floor. Leaning back down I kept eye contact with Kel, even as my mouth covered his cock I kept eye contact with him. His back arched and he cried out. I slid up and down on his cock. He thrashed under me. His bony hips slamming into my head as I worked his cock with my tongue. He whimpered and cried, his body twisting and thrashing under mine.
I straightened up and slid off the bed. My feet throbbed and I winced. Kel started to get up but I waved him back. Carefully I worked my way out of my jeans. Kel eyed my stiff cock and licked his lips. I crawled back up the bed and across Kel until I was straddling his chest my cock tapping his lips. Panic flickered in his eyes for a moment. Then he smiled. His hands slid up my thighs. I leaned forward and gripped the headboard. My cock slid down his throat. I gasped as shockwaves rolled out from my groin: up my back and down my legs.
I slammed my cock down his throat. Harder and harder. Kel's mouth was absolute paradise, hot and slippery. And he had a grip that could have taken paint off a wall! I slammed into his mouth in long swift strokes.
"Oh Kel.. ahhhnnn.. Kel. KEL!" My head exploded. I slammed my hips into his face as my cock exploded thick cream down his throat.
I slid back down and kissed him. A long deep kiss that got me hard again. I sat up and retrieved the tube of lube off of the bedside table. Kel's eyes glittered at me. I lifted his leg and positioned myself between them. His pretty cock was drooling like a fountain. I fisted it slowly. Kel thrashed and cried out.
"Josh." He moaned.
I smeared lube on my fingers. Kel lifted his butt. I pulled a pillow down and tucked it under his butt. Gently I worked first one then another finger into his hole. He moaned and twisted, his hips pushing down harder onto my fingers. I murmured softly and worked a third finger in. Kel's cock jerked. I leaned over and cleaned the precum off his belly and hips. He moaned and cried out, his fingers twisting in my hair. Moving closer I pulled my fingers out of his hole and positioned my cock against it.
"You want this, Kel?" I asked. "Do you want me inside you?"
"Yes." He sobbed. "Oh yes, please Josh."
I dropped my palms flat on the bed on either side of his head and pushed. My cock slid into him. Fire ripped down my back and I cried out. Kel wrapped his legs around my waist. For a moment I couldn't do anything but shake. But soon enough I was moving. A slow even stroke, deep into him then almost all the way out. He cried and babbled my name. Kel's hands gripped my upper arms; I could feel the nails biting in. Faster and faster I stroked slamming deeper and deeper into him.
I sat up and pulled his hips closer. I was inside Kel, inside the man I'd die for. He clenched his butt muscles sending sparks of pleasure up my cock. I groaned and slammed him back on me harder and harder.
My leg cramped and I fell forward with a howl. My arms wrapped around Kel and I rolled over onto my back pulling him up on top of me. Surprisingly I remained inside him. The cramp went away and I continued pumping into Kel. He bounced looking oddly like a scarecrow for a moment. He leaned forward and our mouths met in a soul wrenching kiss.
"Kel.. Kel.. Kel" I moaned into his mouth.
I rolled over again. Pounding harder and harder, deeper and deeper. Kel grunted and moaned. He tangled his hands in my hair and pulled my head down. Lips and tongues entwined. My focus narrowed to Kel, the feel of his hands on my shoulders. The feel of his mouth on mine. And the body shredding feeling of being inside him.
I jerked and slammed deep into him. He cried out his back arching. His cock exploded flooding his belly with thick cream. I slammed in one more time sliding smoothly across his belly on the cream . My head fell back and I cried out his name as I filled his insides with my own cream. After a minute I dropped down on him. He grunted and I shifted my weight. Blindly I found his lips. Cradling his head in my hands I devoured his mouth.
"God Kel," I panted. "Kel, my Kel, my treasure."
Kel sighed and held my head close.
"Josh, my beautiful avenging angel." He whispered.
I held him close. I never wanted to let go of him but truth was I had to piss. Kel grinned when I told him and slid out of bed. He pulled me up. By the time I returned from the bathroom, Kel was dressed in the pyjama bottoms again. I held him tight.
"Why the jammies?" I asked softly.
I can't sleep without something on. Its... protection. A barrier between me and possibly unwanted attention." He answered looking down. I tipped his chin up. "Not unwanted from you, of course. But there are still nights when the past isn't very far away to me."
I shivered. If I ever got my hands on that man!
"All right." I said softly. "Let's go to bed. My feet hurt."
He looked worried. I smiled and crawled into the bed. Kel climbed in beside me and snuggled down into my arms. I wrapped the comforter around us again. I never wanted to leave this feeling of peace. This place I belonged.