Hey guys in response to your e-mails I'm changing the introduction to my chapters. No longer will I apologize for the grammatical and spelling errors. I don't have an editor, so I proof read all of this by myself. As I've said before this story will move rather slow. All the e-mails are great. Thank you all for taking the time to write. As I've stated many times, your e-mails are what keep me going. All comments are welcome. The addy is john_mateo418@yahoo.com (underscore between john_mateo) Please write and tell me if you like my story. I hope to hear from you.
The usual disclaimer don't read this if you're too young or it's against the law where you live. This story is about gay men.
Thanks guys and now on with the story of John and Mateo
XIV
The sound of clashing metal against metal rang out as the weights moved up and down against gravity. Their cry went unanswered as the lonely form moved around the room. He was alone, lately it seemed like he was always alone. His chiseled body was covered with sweat, causing it to appear glass-like. He felt numb as his muscles strained against the heavy weight. What was he doing here all alone? "Coach said never to workout alone." He knew the reason why he was here, he had to get away. Get away from them. He heard his coach's voice screaming in his ears. "Push into the pain!"
He was there last night. The hypnotic music still echoed in his mind. He saw everything. He saw the hugs, the kiss, the way they looked at each other. The love they shared. His mind playing the scene over and over in his mind. `Push into the pain'
His body ached as he continued to push it. His muscles felt as if they were on fire, being torn from the very limbs they supported. The pain in his heart far outweighed the pain he felt in his muscles. Anger cheered him on as he continued to mindlessly workout. He didn't heed the warnings from his own body to stop. His body screamed to stop, begging him to put an end this madness. `Push into the pain'
Questions flooded his mind. "Why? What's wrong with me? Why can't I be happy? Why can't I find love? Why doesn't anyone love me?" His own demons repeated the questions, accusing him, "What's wrong with YOU? Why aren't YOU happy? Why can't YOU find love? Why doesn't anyone love YOU? His own thoughts mocked him. Would he ever find love? Did he even know what love was? Was he even capable of love?
`Push into the pain'
Tears began to fall from his eyes. He thought back to when he was messing around with a boy from school. They were caught by his dad. They didn't hear him come in early after work to find them in his bedroom, naked. He could still feel the slaps across his face and the punches to the stomach. He remembered the words his father called him as he struck him over and over again. "Faggot! Cocksucker!" He took the punishment while his buddy ran for his life. He laid in a puddle of blood. His father almost killed him. Later in the hospital a social worker from child services came and interviewed him. He knew they suspected child abuse. He lied to protect his father. He told them he fell down a flight of stairs. His father's voice still haunted his thoughts. The tears continued to flow down his cheeks. Nobody would even noticed them if they saw him. All they would see was his sweat covered face. They wouldn't be able to feel his pain. They wouldn't be able to see his wounded heart. They would never understand him. He wore his mask. So well, that many times even he believed the deception.
Finally his body had too much. He screamed out as he released the weights. They came crashing down, to rest in their cradle. He sat up. His chest heaving in and out as his body craved oxygen. He hung his head as his body finally rested.
As he sat there, he remember that day when he spied on John Clark in the shower. He remember the smooth body of the blond boy as he washed. He could see every inch of him. He watched as John stoked his cock. He wanted - no, he craved that cock.
He enjoyed spying on guys as they took their shower. He did it in high school so he continued in college. Their were so many hot guys. He had seen many jerk off in the shower as John had. He would always join them as they stroked. But he wanted John.
His body reacted to the all the memories flooding his thoughts. He felt that familiar stirring in his jockstrap. He unconsciously rubbed the front of his work-out shorts.
"What's wrong with me." he surprised himself. The words echoed off the walls of the college gym. He hadn't realized he spoken the words which haunted his thoughts. He quickly scanned the room for any unknown visitors that might have slipped into the room unannounced. There was no one. He couldn't be gay. He didn't want to be gay. "What's wrong with me?" again he said under his breath.
He finally stood on his legs. Like the rest of his body his legs were strong and smooth. When he was on the swim team in high school he got in the habit of shaving his legs and trimming his pubes. He was used to the remarks from the other guys in the locker room. He would only laughed as he accused them of looking at his body. He'd call them homos, and they all would laugh. He moved his strong body down to the floor-mat, stretching his body. He opened his legs as he leaned forward. He was proud of his body. His ability to flex gave him an advantage in sports. As he stretched his hands moved along the muscles of his legs, feeling the hard muscles under the tight skin. His mind swirled with thoughts of a naked John. His smaller body. His bright blue eyes. His blond bush, his smooth ass. He imagined his hands moving over that body. Touching every inch. Feeling the warm skin under his hands. Tasting that body...
His thoughts were interrupted as the door opened. He blushed trying to will away his erection. He quickly closed his legs and continued his cool down. In attempt to hide his face he lowered his upper body down over his legs.
"There you are. I wondered where you were. Why didn't you tell me you were going to workout I would have joined you."
"I guess I just felt like being alone." He hoped that his friend couldn't tell he was lying.
His friend sensed something wasn't right. He watched as he continued to stretch.
"I went to your dorm room earlier. I couldn't find you and nobody knew where you were. Where did you go?"
"Who are you? My mother? Get off my back dude." He stood up, his erection now gone. He eyed his friend, meeting his stare and then quickly looking away. He moved his arms above his head in one more move to stretch his body. He looked at his friend. He knew that he was just worried about him. "I'm OK dude. Really. He smiled trying to convince his friend that he was alright. "I just have some stuff on my mind that's all." He walked over to his friend and slapped him on his shoulder. "I didn't know you cared so much." He feigned a sorrowful look.
His friend saw what he was doing and joined in the fun. "Well, next time you do this, no dessert for you mister." They both started to laughed as they began to wrestle. Soon both young men were out of breath.
"Do you want to catch a movie?"
"Sure, let me take a shower and I'll meet you in the dorm lobby in about 30 minutes."
The two friends left the gym and headed back to their dorms.
Saturday morning found everyone at breakfast. Rafael and Anita had a plane to catch at 1pm so this was a send off for the Latin couple. They didn't want to leave as they were enjoying their visit with the boys and with John's parents but Rafael had some appointments to keep and his mother needed to return to her work as well. Everyone was still on a natural high from last night's performance. After the concert Mamma Anna insisted that everyone come to the restaurant for coffee and dessert. She served her house special tiramisu. They talked and laughed until the early hours of the morning. They also had the opportunity to get acquainted with Chris, Jacob's date. Jacob seemed really happy. John was very happy to see that he'd found a new friends and possibly a new boyfriend. Jacob invited John, Mateo, PT and Gino to his place the following Saturday for a BBQ. The two couples were looking forward to the get together.
After breakfast Mateo went with his parents back to the hotel to help them with any last minute packing. He then would drive them to the airport and send them off to Mexico. He was sorry to see them go.
"Mama Y Papa, can't you stay a little longer?" he tried his best to convince his parents. "No Mijo, we can't. Your father has meetings on Monday and he needs to do some work before that. We want to stay too but we can't." His face dropped at the realization that they wouldn't be staying. "OK, I understand." His face lit up as he continued, "Did you enjoy yourselves last night?" Rafael spoke, "Oh yes, Mijo we did. John is a very talented young man. He will definitely go far if is continues on the path that he is on. We are very proud of him and of you." Mateo's heart filled with pride at the mention on John by his father. He was so happy that his parents accepted John as his partner. "Gracias, papa, that means a lot coming from you." Rafael put his hand on Mateo's shoulder, "Mijo, remember that your mother and I are very proud of you and that we love you. Nothing will ever change that." Mateo smiled, "I know papa, and I love you both as well."
As Mateo returned to the hotel with his parents, John did the same thing with his. His parents were actually going to drive to Washington DC to visit his Uncle Jack, his dad's brother. With it only being a two hour drive it made sense to visit while they were in the area.
So by 1pm John's parents were on the road to DC and John was on his way to do a few errands. His first stop was to the tux shop to return the tuxedos. He walked in to find Tyson helping another guy with his tux. He smiled as his eyes met Tyson's baby blues. He stood at the counter and waited patiently as he finished up with his customer. Tyson finally walked over and smiled at John, "Hey John, sorry about the wait. How are you?" Tyson's boyish smile was contagious and John couldn't help but smiling himself. "Hey Ty, I'm cool bro, just here to return these tuxedos." John pointed to the tuxedos he had hung on the bar near the cash register. "Um, it's my tux and Mateo's tux." he was uncertain how Tyson would react about him returning Mateo's tux. Tyson smiled, "Cool, let me just check them out, make sure everything is here and then I'll send you on your way." John returned the smile and nodded his head. "Cool" While he checked the tuxedos Tyson began to chat with John, "So how did the concert go last night? Mateo said you played the piano?" John grinned, "yup I had a concert last night. Everything went well. It was a blast." Tyson flashed a smile, "That's so cool, I wish I could have been there, but I had a date with my girlfriend Katherine, it was her birthday."
John spoke, "Well, maybe next time." Once again Tyson smiled, "I'd like that John. I really would." He finished he inspection of the tuxedos and gave John the receipts for the returned items. As he was leaving the shop John stopped and he turned around, "Say Tyson" John paused, "Next Saturday we're getting together for a BBQ at my friends place. Would you like to come? You can bring your girlfriend." John could imagine the cogs turning in Tyson's head as he was thinking. "That sounds cool John, we don't have any plans and I'm off that weekend. So yeah, sounds like fun." John grinned, hesitating he spoke, "Oh yeah I need to tell you something." Tyson looked at him giving him his total attention. "Um...geez I don't know how to say this." Ty quickly smiled and spoke, "It's cool if your gay John, I have an older brother that's gay. It's no biggie." John just about fell on the floor. "Wow I didn't know I was that obvious. What gave me away?" Tyson snickered, "Nothing really, I guess I put two and two together." I kinda figured you were Mateo's boyfriend when you were returning his tux. Like I said, it's no big deal." John relaxed as he saw the honesty in Tyson's eyes. "Thanks bro, I knew you were a cool guy. I didn't want you to show up and be surprised when you found out you were having a BBQ with a bunch of gay dudes." Tyson laughed, "It wouldn't have been the first time. As long as nobody tried to hit on my I'm fine." John chuckled, "Nah all the guys there have boyfriends already so I think you'll be pretty safe."
John and Tyson exchanged telephone numbers and then John left, promising to call Tyson later with details about the BBQ.
The spring semester finally started and things were beginning to fall back into place. John became a little celebrity often being stopped on his way to class by someone who attended the concert. He felt good that he was able to share his talent with others around him and bring a little joy into their lives. Both he and Mateo were carrying a full schedule with 12 units each. They had one class together. English Lit. John enjoyed the class but Mateo was having a little problem with all the reading required for the class. John was there to help him along with encouragement and the occasional "nag". John also joined the orchestra as last semesters pianist graduated. Professor Graham had welcomed him literally with open arms. It felt good to be needed.
Friday night found the two young lovers at Dominick's for Pizza. They met PT and Gino there. Although Gino was working, he made sure that he had some time to talk and eat pizza with his friends.
At 11pm PT decided to leave. He needed to catch up on some reading for his Biology class. He excused himself and left the restaurant. John and Mateo continued to talk and enjoy their sodas. At 11:15 Mateo's cell phone rang, "Hello? Oh no, where are you at? OK I'll be right there, give me ten minutes." He hung up his phone and looked at John. "That was PT, his bus broke down. He wants me to come take a look." John raised his eyebrows, "What's wrong with it?" Mateo shrugged his shoulders, "Not sure, he said he couldn't get it started. I shouldn't be that long. Do you want to come with me or do you want me to drive you home?" John smiled, "Nah, that's OK I`ll pass. I'll walk back, it's not too far." Mateo stood up, he leaned over the table and kissed John, "OK baby, I'll see you later. Warm up the bed for me." John snickered, "You bet. I'll see you later." Mateo turned and walked out the door.
He walked along the empty streets. Once again he was alone. He didn't know why he was out so late. After the movie his friend wanted to hang out but he didn't. He turned down the invitation. Rather than spend time with his friend he found himself walking along this lonely road. His thoughts turned once again to John. What was it about him that caused him to feel this way? He pulled out a flask from his back pocket, the amber liquid burned as it moved down his throat. He continued to drink while playing back that day in his mind. The first time he had seen John his breath was taken away. He was determined to get to know him. He had looked so innocent and pure. He staggered, feeling the affects of the liquor on his empty stomach. "That damn Mateo." He muttered under his breath. "I should be with him not you." He continued to walk. He passed by Dominick's restaurant. He looked into the restaurant window seeing John by himself. He was talking to Gino. His body reacted to the sight of seeing John. He felt the tightness in his pants as he became aroused. He needed to talk to John. To tell him about his feelings. He needed to think. He moved on passed the restaurant, drinking from his flask. He finally stopped. He rested his body against a building. He moved into an alley. He pulled out a joint from his shirt pocket. He fired it up as he tried to pull his thoughts together.
John had stayed for a few more minutes talking to Gino. He really didn't want to keep him from his work. Mamma and Pappa had left to go home about 9pm and Gino was there to close up the place. Knowing that he had work to do, John excused himself and began his walk back to the dorms.
He heard footsteps approaching. Was somebody following him? He looked around the corner of the building. He saw John coming his way. He was humming a tune. He needed to talk to him. He needed to tell him how he felt. What was he going to do? He took another drink form his flask. "Why can't YOU find love? Why can't YOU find love? Why can't YOU find love?" The questions screamed in his mind. He need to act now.
As John was passing a building he felt someone grab him. He tried to yell out but the wind was knocked from his lungs as he hit the pavement. His face came into contact with the asphalt and he felt the warm blood start to run from his nose down his face. He felt a heavy body sitting on his legs. He tried to turn to look but the hand on the back of his head prevented him from doing so. His heart filled with fear, "What do you want?" he pleaded with his attacker, "Take anything you want, just please don't hurt me." His attacker didn't say a word. John could feeling the hot breath on his neck. The sour smell of liquor along with blood filled his nostrils. He felt his body being picked up. He felt like a toy in the hands of his attackers strong arms. He was placed against the cold brick of the building. He looked up into his attackers face. He was shocked. John was about to speak when he felt the fist of his attacker smash into his nose. He heard the crunch of cartilage breaking. The pain was intense. He felt like he was going to pass out. He looked into the eyes of his attacker. He saw the rage of an animal. The inhuman nature of a beast ready to devour his prey. He doubled over in pain as his attacker punched him in the stomach. He couldn't breath. He felt like he was going to die. He fell to his knees. Pain exploded in his side as he felt the attacker kick his side. His attacker pushed John onto his back. John felt the hands on his belt buckle. His pants were being pulled down. "No, please don't" He managed to say between painful breaths of air. His shoes were taken off. His pants and boxers followed. He felt the cold hands on his legs. Running up and down his thighs. He began to cry as he felt the hands on his soft cock. "Please don't. Leave me alone." His cries went unanswered as his attacker leaned forward over his face. "Shut up bitch! Stop the fucking crying you faggot whore. I'm going to teach you what happens to faggots like you." Before he could speak again John felt another blow to his face. John was barely hanging on to consciousness.
Time seemed to slow down. What was he doing? Why was he hurting John? The image of his father invaded his thoughts. He was doing the same thing to John. WHY? He couldn't stop hitting him. His fist came into contact with John's face again and again. His hands were covered in blood. He lifted John's legs onto his shoulders. He unzipped his pants. He had dreamt about this moment so many times.
John tried to block the punches that were being thrown at his face. His attempts to fend off his attacker were in vain. He felt his eyes swell shut. The taste of blood filled his mouth. He laid still, all his energy was gone. His body began to shut down. He pictured his beautiful Mateo. The image of his beautiful man calmed his mind as he felt his legs move. His legs rested on the shoulders of this animal. He screamed as he felt the invasion. The hard member of the attacker entered his ass. He tried in vain to move but his body would not respond. "Move John! Don't just lay here and take it!" His mind screamed but his body wouldn`t take any action. "Ahhh, nooo!" The pain brought tears to his eyes as he felt the abuse on his hole.
"Please don't do this." He pleaded in vain. The pain invaded his entire body. He couldn't hear anything. He couldn't talk, or scream. He felt lost as the blackness overtook him.
He continued his attack on John. He couldn't tell if he was conscious of not. He hadn't moved for a few seconds. He looked down on the small form underneath him. He felt the warmth of John's ass. He wanted this so much but now that he had it, he didn't want it. He looked at John's swollen face. He looked at the beautiful face that he had bashed with his fists. Blood was everywhere. He withdrew from John. He heard a small whimper from John as he zipped up his pants. Finally realizing what he had done, his body began to shake, "What have I done?" he said as tears began to streak down his face. His picked up the limp form of John and cradle him in his arms. "What have I done?" He repeated the question. The dark night surrounded them. His body began to shake with sobs as he cried into John's neck.
A few moments later he walked out from the alley alone. No one saw him covered in blood. His body still shook from the affects of his attack on John. He walked to the corner and saw a public phone.
"911 operator 1952 what is your emergency?"
"He needs an ambulance."
"Sir, who needs an ambulance?"
"He's been attacked. He's laying in the alleyway at 5th and Main."
"Sir, may I get your name?"
"Hurry I don't think he's conscious. He needs help."
"Sir, an ambulance has been dispatched to that location. May I get your name please?"
He hung up the phone. He looked at the alley before turning away. The tears once again fell from his eyes. "What's wrong with me?" He once again walked alone into the night to face his demons.
The sound of sirens and flashing of lights caught Gino's attention as he was wiping down some tables near the door. He walked to the glass door and looked out just as the ambulance and paramedic unit were pulling up to the corner. He called back over his shoulder to anyone within earshot, "Hey! I'll be right back there's something going on at the corner." In the back of the restaurant he heard a reply of "OK". He felt the chill of the cold night in his bones as he neared the activity on the corner. Someone was laying on the ground. He couldn't see much from where he was standing. He overheard the EMT as he spoke to his dispatcher, "We have a white male approximately 17 years old. Multiple abrasions on his face, abdomen and legs. Possible rape victim..." The words seemed to echo off into the sky as Gino moved closer. "Possible rape? White male? Who could it be?" His heart seemed to stop as one of the EMT workers moved away from the face of the poor soul laying on the cold ground. He couldn't believe what he was seeing, "JOHN! OH GOD, NO, JOHN!" he screamed. He rushed to his friends side only to be held back by two huge arms. "Let me go! He's my friend!" He sobbed, "Oh god, John." He now could see clearly the body of John as he laid in a pool of blood. His hair was caked red with blood and his naked body was cover with welts and bruises. He looked like as animal had attacked him. A deep voice spoke, "Settle down. Calm yourself. Do you know the victim?" Gino couldn't speak, he nodded his head. He looked to see the same EMT that had called his dispatcher looking into his eyes. He sat Gino down on the curb and put a blanket around his shoulders. "Who's your friend?" He asked in a gentle voice. "His name is John, John Clark. He was on his way back to the dorm. It's only like a fifteen minute walk." Gino glanced over to see the others working on his friend. He was strapped to a gurney with an IV in his arm. He looked so pale. "We're going to give your friend the best treatment possible. We're going to take him to St Peter's hospital. Do you have a way of contacting any family members?" Gino nodded his head, "I'll make some calls." The EMT stood up. "You going to be OK?" Gino nodded his head "Yeah." He looked at John as he was wheeled into the back of the ambulance. "Who did this?" The EMT looked to Gino, "Hey, they're going to find out who did this OK? The police will be here and they'll check things out. I'm sure they'll want to talk to you, do you live near here?"
"My grandparents own that restaurant over there." He pointed to Dominick's. "I'll be over there. I need to make some calls." The EMT wrote down the phone number and address to the hospital and gave it to Gino. He watched as his friend was taken away.
Well that's number 14, I hope you all enjoyed it. A little drama in the lives of our two young lovers. Let me know what you think. Always open to new ideas. Take care all, David