Obligatory warnings and disclaimers:
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If reading this is in any way illegal where you are or at your age, or you don't want to read about male/male relationships, go away. You shouldn't be here.
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I don't know any of the celebrities in this story, and this story in no way is meant to imply anything about their sexualities, personalities, or anything else. This is a work of pure fiction.
Questions and commentary can be sent to "writerboy69@hotmail.com". I enjoy constructive criticism, praise, and rational discussion. I do not enjoy flames, and will not tolerate them.
Back to the story in progress.
Jack
I woke up in the middle of the night with Josh still wrapped around me. In our sleep we had turned, so that we were front to front, both of us half hard. Most of the rose petals had tumbled to the floor, and the sheets were twisted around us, rubbing sensually across our bare skin each time one of us moved. I wasn't sure what had woken me up, but Josh was still asleep, mostly, mumbling into my neck. I tried listening to him, to figure out what he might be dreaming about, but it sounded like song lyrics. I chuckled softly, thinking that he must be at a concert somewhere in his head. His body, twitching against me, seemed to support that, although he wasn't dancing. Instead he would jump or shake a little every few seconds, and I figured that must have been what had awakened me.
I looked down at Josh's face, barely visible in the soft light from outside. The candles had all gone out, burning down and then drowning themselves in the bowls of water, but their heavy scent was still mixed in with the flowers, hanging in the air. Josh's eyes darted behind his closed lids, and his breath puffed out against my neck as he mumbled and muttered his way through whatever lineup was playing in his head. His lips were soft against me, and his body was comfortably warm. He shifted a little, muscles pressing against mine, but not tensed. He was soft in repose, completely relaxed, and I looked down his back, following the curve of his spine, visible where the sheet had slid to our waists. Just a fraction of the curved rise of his ass was visible, a little hint of crack, and one of his legs was thrown over both of mine under the sheet.
He laughed in his sleep, startling me, and I smiled and kissed his forehead. Sighing, he nuzzled his head against my neck, his arm sliding up my chest to my shoulder as he pulled himself more tightly against me. I ran my hand over his back, kissing his eyelid, and I felt his lips move against my neck, kissing a little. He wasn't fully up yet, but he was getting there, and I started to pull away, not wanting to wake him. Josh clutched me more tightly, gripping me with both hands now, and slid upward a little, until his mouth was near mine. He began kissing my jaw, and I saw his eyes drift lazily open as he pressed his mouth to mine, fully awake now. His tongue pressed inside my mouth as he rolled partially on top of me, our lips parting with a soft sucking sound before he returned his to mine.
I sighed against Josh, my hands sliding over his back as he rolled onto me, pressing me down into the mattress. His skin was smooth beneath my fingers, and I felt his back rising and falling with his breathing as he kissed his way down my jaw to nuzzle at my neck again. He worried over the spot where he had raised a hickey earlier, teasing it with his mouth, and I inhaled sharply as I felt him suck lightly at it again. I'd have a bruise there for days at this rate. His chest rested against mine, our breathing synchronized so that he inhaled when I exhaled, our pecs rising and falling in one smoothly continuous wave, not fighting each other. One of his hands slid around to the back of my head, cupping it, turning my face toward him for more kisses before turning it away, giving him access to my neck again, and my hands kept playing over his back. His other hand drifted lower, dancing over my abs, and then began to lightly caress my half hard cock, which immediately began to stiffen.
I sighed again, my eyes closed, and felt his own cock stiffening against my hip. I wanted to grab it, and give him some of the same slow pleasure he was giving me, but it was trapped between our bodies. Instead my hands slid down, over the dipped hollow of his lower back, and began to caress his ass. Like everything else about him, Josh's ass was perfect, a firm, rounded bubble butt with just enough give to make feeling it up fun. He shifted against me, pressing his cock more firmly against my hip, and his fingers, wrapped around my cock, stopped caressing it, tracing the veins and ridges, and began to stroke lightly, slowly. Josh's mouth was still buried under my jaw, kissing and sucking at my neck, his other hand turning my head from side to side so that he could get to either one. His hand left my head and began to slide around under the pillows, searching for those condoms from earlier. He found one and pulled it out, mimicking my earlier move of tearing it open with my mouth as his other hand continued to stroke my hard cock.
I gasped as I felt him begin rolling the rubber down over me, surprised.
"Josh?" I whispered.
"Shhh," he breathed against my neck, still kissing lightly all around under my chin and down to the hollow of my throat.
Josh shifted, sliding over me, and I lay still, knowing he liked to do this at his own pace. It wasn't exactly rare that I fucked Josh, but usually I was the bottom in our relationship. Every once in a while, when he felt like going this way, I always let him take it slowly, since he wasn't as used to it. He spit into his hand and began rubbing my cock with it, and I wondered if maybe we should have picked up that lube off of the floor after all. His tanned legs came down on either side of me, and I felt my cockhead pressing against him. He squeezed his eyes closed, sliding down a little, and we both gasped as I popped inside through his tight ring.
"You ok, baby?" I whispered, running my fingertips up and down his back soothingly. He was so tight, and I had to steel myself to keep from bucking my hips up.
"Yeah," he whispered.
He planted his hands squarely on my pecs, a palm over each nipple, and began to very slowly sit up. As he did he lowered himself down onto me, a little at a time, and I kept running my hands over him, kissing whatever part of him happened to be over my mouth. Finally he reached the end, lowering himself all the way down, and he sat there, motionless, his body tense, his head tossed back and his eyes closed. My hands drifted down his firm chest to play with his nipples, and he smiled, rolling his head forward to stare down at me. When his eyes found mine, glistening in the dark, he very slowly began to raise himself, and I dropped my hands down to rest them on the tops of his thighs, feeling the muscles flex sinuously, trained from years of dancing to top physical form.
Josh was beautiful as he sat above me, all of his muscles melded seamlessly together, flawlessly. From the mop of brown and gold hair down to his blue eyes, from his toned calves up to his firmly jutting cock with its full, low hanging balls and their lacy covering of hair, Josh was beautiful. It was more than just his body, though, more than his dark tan or chewable brown nipples. Josh seemed to glow from within, the shining force of his personality. It could be easily overshadowed by the others if you weren't looking for it, could be lost in Chris's frenetically twitching enthusiasm or Justin's subtle and not so subtle manipulation of the spotlight, but Josh was lit with a strength and grace and overall joy for life that couldn't help but burst out of him, and infect everyone he touched. And he loved me, which never ceased to amaze me. He could have anyone he wanted, and out of all the world he wanted me.
Now that he had relaxed a little Josh began to pick up the pace, riding me a little harder, letting out a little soft yelp each time he lowered himself and I stabbed inside of him. My own hips had begun to move now, involuntarily, and Josh had dropped his hands down to cover mine as they sat on his thighs, lacing his fingers through my own. His hands, like the rest of him, were strong, but gentle, and our hands clenched together each time I thrust into him. He stared down at me, smiling, his eyes squeezing a little each time, but not closing, and little waves of pleasure cascaded over his face. I was sighing as he clenched around me, feeling my whole body focus on the intense pleasure rolling up from my cock, finding myself getting more and more turned on as I watched Josh starting to sweat above me. I unlocked my hands from his and began to play them up and down his chest, feeling the light sheen of moisture, twirling my fingertips around the edges of his nipples. Josh curled his fingers, scratching them up and down my chest, and I sighed with pleasure at the added sensations.
Josh began to ride me faster now, a little harder, and I brought my hands down from his chest to wrap them both around his cock. It was sticking out from his body, hard and throbbing, and he groaned loudly, his voice cracking in a high pitched sigh as I touched him. I began to roll one hand around and around his spongy, firm brownish cockhead, squeezing it a little and caressing it, smearing around the salty leaking precum that was rolling in thick, glistening droplets out of his slit while I slid the other up and down his steely hard, silken pole. Josh's mouth hung open, and he tore his eyes away from my face to look down, and watch my hands work at him. He began to pant louder now, the high pitched little yelping exhales that always told me he was close, and began to dance on top of me even faster, rolling his hips, his thighs clenching beautifully as they clenched and lowered. His hands, still on my chest, were gripping at me now, the fingertips digging in a little as he used me for traction.
"Jack, Jack, Jack," he panted, over and over, my name mixed in with whimpering groans and whines.
"I love you, Josh," I said, and his head snapped up, his eyes searching for mine. His blue eyes locked onto my green ones, and I felt myself falling into them, lost in the sapphire pools. "I love you."
Josh's whole body locked, pecs flexed, abs rigid, and he let out a loud yelp that was almost a scream as whitish streamers of hot cum splattered out of his cock, spraying all over me in glistening ropes. Seeing him like that, feeling his ass clamp down, vise-like, on my cock, I was pushed over the edge as well, and my hips jerked up, almost throwing him off as I felt myself shoot, and then shoot again. My hand closed tightly around his cock as I spasmed, squeezing another spurt out, and then he dropped down, collapsing on top of me in a sweaty pile of limbs. I felt his breath against my neck, and then his hands slid up, grabbing my head roughly. He turned my face toward his and jammed his tongue into my mouth, kissing me with such force it felt as if he was trying to consume me. When he finally pulled back I looked up into his blue eyes and smiled.
"Was it good?" he asked, kissing my cheek next to my mouth.
"Always," I answered, feeling him start to slide off of me. I reached over for the tissues, but he pulled the box out of my hands.
"Let me," he whispered, dropping down. He pulled the condom off, wadded it up in a tissue, and threw it onto the floor in the general direction of the last one. Dropping down, he began to lap at my cock, swiping off the cum with his wide tongue.
"Oh, God, Josh," I panted, pressing my head into the pillow, my back arching as my fingers clutched the sheets tightly.
I was always sensitive after I shot, and his tongue felt both softly smooth and sandpaper rough as it washed over me. Climbing up my cock, giving the head a few extra licks for good measure as he cleaned me, Josh began to slide up my torso. His tongue followed the lines of his cum, cleaning up his sticky seed as he worked his way over my abs and then back up my chest. Finally he was laying on top of me again, and when he brought his mouth down to mine I greedily snaked my tongue over and around his, savoring the shared taste of both of us as we moaned into each other. Finally he pulled back, kissing me again, and lay down beside me, facing me.
"I love you, Jack," he whispered, staring at me as his hand drifted up to caress the side of my face. "Forever."
"I love you, too, Josh," I answered. "Forever. And then some."
We drifted back to sleep, cradling each other, our noses brushing against each other as our heads shared the same pillow. I felt warm, safe, and loved as I lay there, Josh's hand resting on my face and mine resting against his side, and the last thing I heard before I drifted off was him sighing contentedly, his warm breath tickling my face. Josh's sleep was probably peaceful, but I woke up later covered in sweat, stifling a scream. Josh had drifted over to the other side of the bed, one of his arms thrown toward me across the mattress, and I sat up, holding my face in my hands, trying to collect myself and slow my breathing down. I looked over at Josh, seeing his face turned toward me, and watched his eyebrows furrow together in his sleep, a wave of worry crossing his features. He mumbled something in his sleep, and I wondered if he could sense that I was awake. The two of us were so in tune sometimes it was scary.
Sliding carefully out of bed, feeling sticky from the sweat, I padded into the bathroom, noticing that the sun was up. I thought about taking a shower, but glanced at the clock, and realized I had time for a bath in the huge whirlpool tub. I didn't plan to play with any of the extra settings, just filling the tub up with steaming water, but it did have these really nice headrests, and I settled onto one, folding a wet washcloth over my eyes. My heart was still fluttering a little, but I was mostly calmed down, and I lay in the tub, almost completely submerged, drifting and trying to put the nightmare out of my mind. I hadn't had one in a couple of days, and had actually started to entertain the thought that they might be going away, but this morning proved that wasn't the case.
I heard a light splash and felt the water shift a little. Lifting the washcloth, I saw Josh sitting on the side of the tub, watching me. Bubbling foam began to fill the end of the tub, and I realized he had thrown a bath ball of some kind in there with me. He looked at me carefully, concerned, and stroked the side of my face with the back of his fingers.
"Can I come in?" he asked.
"There's room for two," I said, sliding over a little.
Josh slid into the tub, reaching over to flick on the whirlpool controls, and suddenly there was foam everywhere. It was lightly scented, and kind of soft, and I tried to remember the last time I had a bubble bath. Josh took the washcloth from my hand and turned me, pulling my back against his front as his legs slid up on either side of me. He began to gently run the washcloth in circles over my back, running it up and down my shoulders and down my spine. I raised my knees, folded my arms on top of them, and rested my head on them.
"I woke up, and you weren't in the bed," he said quietly. "Are you ok?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," I lied, closing my eyes.
"No, you're not," Josh said, seeing right through me. He wasn't angry, just concerned. "Nightmare?"
I nodded, sighing.
"Tell me about it, please," Josh said, setting the washcloth aside somewhere. His hands came down on either side of my neck and began to knead my traps, gently but firmly. "I want to help."
"I know," I sighed, feeling some of the tension dropping out of my shoulders. "It wasn't anything new or different, you know, just more of the usual. I was in the basement again, and I was trying to get out. I got the faceplate off, and put my necklace back on, and I was pulling the hinges out of the door. And when I got them out, I started moving the door, and it fell on me."
My voice was so quiet I was surprised Josh could hear it over the swirling of the tub. He kept massaging my neck and my shoulders, waiting patiently as I let everything out. I always tried to treat this lightly, trying to pretend like these were just average little dreams. I mean, really, on the surface they didn't sound particularly horrifying. I got chased by a fat guy. A door fell on me. I found my husband upstairs having sex with his best friend. When I was asleep, though, when I was locked inside of them, I was there. I was back in the basement, and it was all real, stripped of the haze of memory, reduced to the bare urgency I had lived through. No matter how lightly I tried to treat them, though, or how hard I tried to downplay them, Josh always saw the seriousness beneath, and tried to help. He sighed, kissing the back of my neck, his hands kneading at my shoulders as he waited, offering his silent support.
"The door fell on me," I repeated, feeling my closed eyes sting. "I couldn't lift it up, I was too weak, and I was underneath it. I couldn't get out from underneath, and he came down the stairs, and he saw it, and he started walking on it. I couldn't get out, and he started walking on the door, and it was crushing me. It was pushing down on me, and my ribs cracked, and I couldn't breathe, and I couldn't get out from under it, and he was laughing, Josh. He was laughing."
"It's ok," Josh sighed, leaning forward. He wrapped his arms around me, his head on my shoulder, and gently pulled be back against him. I didn't move, still locked into a tight little ball, and I felt his mouth on the side of my face, kissing one of my tears. "It's ok, baby. Why didn't you wake me?"
"I don't know," I answered. "You looked so peaceful, and I wanted to let you sleep. I'm tired of waking you up for this, Josh. I'm tired of waking up for this. I just wish they would stop. I mean, some nights I don't even want to go to sleep, because I'm afraid of what might happen, what I might see. And it doesn't matter that I know they're dreams, because I only know that when I'm awake."
Josh had stopped pulling on me, wrapping himself around me. His arms and chest and legs were all cradling me, enveloping me in his soothing presence, and the scent from the bath was comforting as well, mixed with the feeling of the warm water swirling around us. When I was with Josh it was like being in our own little world, wrapped in each other, but it never seemed to last. We lived for these moments together, and cherished them.
"Jack, you have to remember what your counselor said," Josh sighed, his cheek against mine as his chin rested on my shoulder. Both of our eyes were closed. "They'll get less and less, and someday they'll be gone. And until they are, you'll always be with me, and you'll always be safe. I won't let anything else happen to you, Jack. I won't fail you again, not ever."
I sighed, wishing we weren't having this discussion again. Josh had mentioned this only a few times since the night we took Justin to the hospital, but each time his face had clouded, some of his light dimming, and I knew that if I turned now he would look exactly the same way. It didn't matter how many times I told him there was nothing else he could have done, that he did all he could and that none of it was his fault. He struggled with it, though, this feeling of failure, and doubt, and I was worried about him. Josh had never failed at anything, and I was worried that this would start to consume him, that he would embrace his perceived failure with the same intensity he turned toward everything else. I wondered if I should send him to therapy, our apparent catch all answer to everything, or if we should work it out together. Until it went away, or we got through it, I thought the best thing I could do was to make sure he knew how important he was to me, and how I didn't hold anything against him.
"Josh, you've never failed me," I sighed. "You couldn't stop what happened, and you've been here for me ever since, Josh. Every time I reach out, you're always here, and that's what I need, Josh."
"But Jack, I can't help you like you need," he sighed against me. "When you're there, in that place, I can't help you, and that kills me."
"I know, but Josh, I don't want you in that place," I said, and felt him tense up a little. "You know what happened to me there. I've told you, and you know what it was like."
"But that's not the same," Josh sighed. "I can tell you I understand, but I can't ever really know what it was like for you, and I feel like I can't help you enough because I don't know that. I've never been in danger like that, Jack. I've never been afraid that I might die, and I can only imagine what it's really like for you to live that over and over, Jack, but I'll never know."
"I don't want you to ever know that, Josh," I said, holding his arms as he kept them wrapped around me. "I love you. I don't want you to be hurt, or to suffer, not ever, Josh. What happened to me is something I never want to have happen to you, Josh. I love you too much to think about you being hurt, for any reason."
He sighed again, and I pulled his arms off of me, turning around in the water. I took his face in my hands.
"Josh, I heard what you said to my mother," I said. "You know that. And what you said then, and just now, about not being able to do enough to help me, is so wrong. I don't know how I can explain that to you, Josh, or how else I can show you. You mean everything to me. Everything. It rips my heart out to hear you think you could ever fail me, Josh. Just knowing that I have you gives me so much strength, makes me so brave, and I don't want you to ever think it's not important, or it's not enough."
"Jack, you don't need me to be brave," he said, smiling at me. "You're brave all by yourself."
"But I'm not by myself anymore," I said, leaning forward to drop a quick kiss onto his mouth. "And see? I feel better already. I love you so much, Josh."
"I love you, too," he answered, the way he always did. He hugged me tightly to him, only our upper bodies touching as our legs tangled with each other under the bubbles. Josh kissed me on the forehead and reached back, grabbing the sides of the tub. He hoisted himself up out of the tub, water coursing down his body in streams, over his abs, down his chest, off of his half hard cock. "Sit tight. I have this idea."
"I have this idea, too," I grinned, staring up at him as I drifted back and set my head on one of the headrests. Josh smiled back as he blotted himself with a towel and then trotted naked out of the bathroom, his ass jiggling.
"Not that idea," he called from the main room. I heard clinking and then he reappeared with the champagne flutes and the bottle from last night. "We didn't drink any of this, and we have two hours before we meet the guys for brunch. After that, we have a wrap up with Lisann, and then we fly out. I want us to have some quiet time before all that."
"Haven't you had enough quiet time?" I asked, grinning lecherously, emphasizing the words "quiet time" as Josh used a hand towel to cover the cork. He popped open the bottle, finally, and laughed as he poured the champagne into the flutes. Carrying them carefully, he slid back into the tub, amazingly not losing his footing, and he sank back down, resting his head on the other headrest.
"Come over here," he said, holding out my flute as he set his on the side of the tub. He had left the bottle over there, too, where we could grab it again for refills. I slid carefully through the water, and Josh guided me with his free hand until I was resting against him, my back to his front, my head on his shoulder. He chuckled softly and reached around to clink his glass against mine. "Cheers."
"Cheers," I answered. "Here's to being married."
"I'll drink to that," Josh said, sipping his. "You know, a lot of people said that once we got married, that would be it for the romance."
"Really?" I asked, sipping my champagne as well. I wasn't a big fan of champagne, but I knew expensive when I tasted it, and was afraid to look at the bottle. "It certainly didn't feel like romance was dead last night, neither time."
Josh laughed against me, his chest shaking against my back as I laughed along with him.
"I didn't say it," Josh said, his free hand sliding up under my arm to rest on my shoulder. "I was just repeating what I heard."
"I think that's only true for straight people," I said, feeling his nose nuzzle my cheek. "We better warn Chris not to propose to Vlada after all. So, Josh, if the romance is dead, where are we going from here?"
Josh sighed, and I wondered what was wrong. Josh and I knew each other so well that I could tell from just that one exhale that the mood was about to shift, and that he was feeling nervous in some way about whatever he was about to tell. I slid my free hand up over the one he had on my chest, letting him know I was here, and that whatever it was would be ok.
"I wanted to talk to you about that, actually," Josh said carefully. "I know that I've been keeping the honeymoon kind of secret, and I want to talk to you about it, because some of it is up to you. I have the first part planned, and I know you're going to love it, but I have an idea for the second half, and I wanted to ask you, because I don't want to do it if you don't want to. It's just something that I know you've been trying not to think about, and I want you and I to do it together, if that's what you want."
His voice was a little urgent, and I turned my head, kissing his cheek.
"Josh, calm down," I said. "I'm not sure why you're so nervous, but please, go ahead and just say it, ok? Whatever your idea is, I want to hear it, and then we can talk about it, ok?"
"I just, you know, it might upset you," Josh said, and I realized he was worried about hurting me.
"Josh, even if it does upset me, I know you don't want to do that, and don't mean it in a bad way," I said. "Please, off with the kid gloves. What's your idea?"
"I was thinking that we might, um," Josh began, and swallowed. He collected himself for a moment, and started again. "I was thinking that since we'll have this time when we're together, and it's just you and me, that maybe this would be a good time, if you want to, to, um, I thought maybe we might look at the envelope from your mother."
I swallowed, thinking, not sure what to say. Josh interpreted my silence as some sort of disapproval, and continued babbling.
"I know that it's private, and that's why I didn't want to push you to open it," he began. "But you did say that you were going to look at it someday, and I don't want you to do that alone. At the same time, though, I don't want to put myself into that if you don't want me there, because it's personal."
"Slow down, Josh, please," I said calmly, wanting him to see that I wasn't angry. "Josh, it's personal, yes, but my personal life is yours. We don't keep things from each other."
"If we don't keep things from each other, then what are you thinking?" Josh asked. "You're so quiet, and it's scaring me a little. If this is the wrong time for this, please, please just say so, and we'll forget I mentioned it."
"No, Josh," I said, squeezing his hand. I grabbed the bottle and topped us both off. "I'm not mad. You just surprised me a little, that's all. I guess I'm just curious. I mean, yeah, I do want to look at that someday, but can I ask why now? It's not exactly a matter of romance. Well, it could have been, since they got a baby out of it, but you know what I mean."
"Well, um, I have a theme for our honeymoon," Josh said, smiling. I chuckled, not at all surprised that he would make everything part of some elaborate matching vision. It was just so Josh. "For the first part, I'm going to take you to Maryland. I'm going to show you where I grew up, so you can see where I went to school, and where we used to live, and all the rest. You took me home, and it brought us so much closer, and I want you to see where I'm from, too."
"Josh, that's so sweet," I said, blushing a little for some reason.
"Thanks," he said, kissing my cheek. "I was hoping you'd like it, but that's only the first part. While we're down there, I thought we might just do some fun stuff, too, like run around Baltimore for a day, and go to DC and maybe see some museums and stuff like that, and just have some quiet time together. What? What are you laughing at?"
"I'm sorry," I said, wiping at my eyes. "We're geeks, Josh. You're like, 'Let's go to a museum for our honeymoon,' and I'm laughing because I really want to do it. We really do belong together."
"Thanks," Josh said, nuzzling my neck. "I figured you'd like it. After DC, though, that's where we have an empty spot, and I thought maybe, since we were looking at where I came from, it would be a good time to look at where you did. We don't have to, if you don't want to, or you're not ready, but I thought I'd make the offer now. I know you've been focusing on the wedding a lot, but now that it's over, I don't want you to start brooding on this. And I don't want you to say you don't brood, because I know you."
"You're right, I guess," I said. "I guess I'd rather face it now, but Josh, can we take it slow?"
"Of course we can," he answered, hugging me tightly to him. "Jack, if you don't want to do this at all, please just say so. I don't want to force you into this if you're not ready yet. I mean, you've only known for like a week. If you aren't ready, or you don't want to think about this yet, please tell me."
"No, Josh, please don't feel bad for suggesting this," I said. "I just, well, I don't want you to feel bad if I end up not being ready. I want to know who I am, Josh, but I'm kind of scared, too. And, well, Evelyn said all the paperwork is in there, and the name of the town. I don't want to disappoint you, Josh, but what if we go out to that town and I don't want to know?"
"Jack, I'll never be disappointed in you," he said. "If all you want to do is go see the town, or not even that, I want you to do whatever you're comfortable with, ok?"
"OK," I said, sipping my champagne again. "I have an idea now, too."
"What?" he asked.
"Finish up your champagne, and then we're going to rinse off and wash our hair," I said. "Then we're getting dressed, because we have to do something else before we go meet everyone."
"What?" he asked, swallowing.
"Well, if we're going to talk about taking trips and going to find these people, well, we should probably start by actually opening the envelope."
To be continued.