Obligatory warnings and disclaimers:
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If reading this is in any way illegal where you are or at your age, or you don't want to read about male/male relationships, go away. You shouldn't be here.
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I don't know any of the celebrities in this story, and this story in no way is meant to imply anything about their sexualities, personalities, or anything else. This is a work of pure fiction.
Questions and commentary can be sent to "writerboy69@hotmail.com". I enjoy constructive criticism, praise, and rational discussion. I do not enjoy flames, and will not tolerate them.
That said, on with Season 7.
Lance
Lance and Justin were slowly getting changed in their dressing room, staring at each other and looking away, both of them blushing. Things between them felt ok again, but now there was this other thing, too, and it kind of frightened them both.
"Justin?" Lance asked, pulling his shirt on. "How did this happen? How did you? What made you?"
"Joey," Justin answered, watching Lance's eyes widen. "Joey and the other guys."
Justin leaned back on the table behind him, crossing his arms. His shirt was sleeveless, and his shoulders gleamed in the light, somehow looking soft and hard at the same time. Lance almost turned away, not wanting to make Justin uncomfortable, but then he remembered that he was allowed to think about Justin that way now. He was allowed to think about Justin's long legs, and the way they looked so tight and powerful under his track pants as he leaned back on that desk, and he was allowed to notice Justin's t-shirt stretching across his pecs. He knew from his own experience that he still had to think of Justin's boundaries, that Justin wouldn't be ready for everything, or maybe even for anything, right away, but for now, it was ok to stare, and to imagine.
"I got my own room because I was afraid that I was keeping you from being happy," Justin said. He saw Lance's face shift, and continued quickly. "It wasn't anything you said, or did. I just, I knew that Chad liked you, and I was afraid that you liked him, but that you wouldn't act on it because I was around, and you thought you had to take care of me, so I thought I should go."
"Justin," Lance began, wanting to tell him that wasn't true. Justin held up a hand to cut him off.
"Let me finish, please," Justin said. "I don't want to tell this over and over, Lance."
"OK," Lance said, understanding. Sometimes it was still hard for Justin to talk about his emotions, and Lance didn't want to get in the way of that.
"I shouldn't have been by myself," Justin said, shaking his head. "I wasn't ready. I couldn't sleep, and I didn't want to go back on it, and go back to you, but I didn't want to be by myself, either. I ordered some breakfast, but when the guy came with it I was too scared to open the door for him, because I didn't know him, and I started arguing with him, through the door. Joey heard me, and he came and broke it up, and then I let him in, and he took care of me. He held onto me, like you did, and it was nice, but he wasn't you. I went back to sleep, and then when I woke up he started talking to me, and we started talking about you, and I told him that I loved you."
"What did he say?" Lance asked, remembering what Joey had said about Lance and Justin falling in love. He said now that he didn't mean that, but this would be the real answer.
"He said that I had to tell you," Justin answered. His eyes were glistening. "He said that I had to tell you, and that if I loved you I had to fight for you, and that I couldn't just give up. I wanted to tell you last night, and that's why I was so weird with you yesterday. I got scared, and I couldn't do it, and Joey, and the other guys, they convinced me to try again."
Lance got up and walked over to him carefully, reaching out to carefully scoop a tear off of Justin's cheek. Justin shuddered under Lance's touch, goosebumps breaking out up and down his arms, and he tilted his head forward, closing his eyes as Lance flicked his tears away.
"Why are you crying, Justin?" Lance asked, his fingertips fluttering over Justin's face, over the long lines he knew so well, past the pink lips and the amber brown eyelashes and brows.
"Because I was stupid," Justin answered. "I was so stupid, and so scared. I should have just talked to you, just told you, but I was so afraid."
"You're not stupid, Justin," Lance said. "I was afraid, too. I care so much about you, and I wanted to help you so much, that I stopped letting myself think about you that way. I didn't want to make you uncomfortable, or hurt you, so I stopped letting myself think about you except as someone who needed me, someone who was vulnerable and fragile and needed to be taken care of."
"I am," Justin admitted, the words squeaking out painfully.
"But you don't ever have to be afraid of me," Lance said. Justin's eyes fluttered open again, so bright and blue, so close to Lance's green ones. "I promised never to hurt you, Justin, and you know I'll keep it."
"Hold onto me, please," Justin said, reaching out.
"Forever," Lance said, wrapping his arms around him. Justin rested his head on Lance's shoulder, shaking a little, wet tears still slowly trickling out of his eyes. "I'll always be here to hold you, Justin."
"I'm sorry I was so stupid," Justin whispered, his arms squeezing Lance's back, his breath fluttering over Lance's neck.
"I was stupid, too, Justin," Lance said. "I didn't like Chad, not that way. He liked me, but when I was with him, it was nice, but I didn't feel anything. I didn't feel that spark, or that feeling inside. I didn't feel the way I do when I'm with you, Justin, but I kept telling myself that if I kept going out with him, I would start to. I thought I could make it come, and it never did. When I was with him, I felt like I was cheating, and I couldn't figure out why, until I realized that I felt like I was cheating on you. I loved you all along, Justin, and I was too dumb to realize it and too scared to tell you."
They held each other for a few moments, just squeezing and holding and being there, cradling each other, and when they pulled back, Justin was smiling.
"It's a good thing we love each other," Justin said.
"Why?" Lance asked.
"Because we're too dumb for anyone else," Justin answered, hugging him tightly again.
"We're not dumb," Lance said, cleaning off both of their leaky faces with a tissue. "We're just."
"Stupid?" Justin suggested, taking Lance's hand.
"Special," Lance corrected, flicking off the lights.
The others were all already on the bus when they got there, and as they climbed up the steps Lance heard all conversation in the back of the bus freeze as they walked in. JC and Jack were on one of the couches, Jack laying back against JC's chest as JC fed him grapes. Joey was flipping through a newspaper at the table, and Chris was pacing around, being normal, hyperactive Chris. They all turned toward Lance and Justin, their eyes ticking from their faces down to their linked hands and back again, nobody saying anything as they all waited.
"Is everything ok?" Chris asked, waiting. Everyone hung on their answer.
"Everything's fine," Lance said, smiling, as he and Justin looked down shyly at their linked hands, neither of them even realizing they were still holding onto each other. "Justin and I realized this whole thing has been a huge misunderstanding, and that we're better off just being friends."
"What?" four voices blurted at once. A grape actually fell out of Jack's mouth, bouncing down his chest and onto the floor. Justin looked up at them, grinning, and wrapped his arms around Lance from behind.
"Gotcha," he said, giggling. "Have you met my boyfriend, Lance?"
There was another pause for a second or two as it sunk in, and then all four of them were moving at once.
"You assholes!" Jack said, jumping up to hug Lance. "That wasn't funny at all!"
"It's about fucking time," Chris said, slapping Lance on the back and then hugging him.
"Congratulations," JC whispered to Justin, holding him tightly. "I'm really happy for you guys."
"Are you really?" Justin asked, pulling back to look into JC's eyes. Their chance had come and gone, but they still cared too much about each other ever to regret it.
"Yeah," JC answered, hugging him again. "Yeah, I am. I just want you to be happy, Justin, you and Lance both."
"Thanks, Josh," Justin whispered. "I love you."
"I love you, too," JC answered, stepping aside so Jack could hug Justin, too.
Lance turned, and found himself face to face with Joey.
"Hey," Joey said quietly, smiling.
"Hey," Lance said, feeling a little uncomfortable. Was he still supposed to be mad at Joey if everything worked out ok? "Justin says, um, that you really helped him, and that a lot of this is, you know, I have you to thank for it, so, um, thanks, Joey."
"You're welcome," Joey said, holding out his hand to shake. Lance glanced down at it, and threw his arms around Joey, almost knocking him over.
"I'm sorry I was mad at you," Lance said, his voice muffled by Joey's shoulder. Joey squeezed him tightly, a patented Joey-bear hug.
"I'm sorry I was a braying jackass," Joey said.
"I'm sorry there's so many people hugging on this bus," Chris said, shaking his head and walking back to his seat. "Any second now it's going to turn into a big sweaty orgy."
"Why does everyone say orgy like it's a bad thing?" Jack asked, licking the side of JC's face quickly as he pulled him back down onto the couch. Justin looked away a little uncomfortably, taking Lance's hand again, and Lance guided him to the other couch. Jack, realizing what he'd done, made an "oh shit" face, but Lance waved it away as he squeezed Justin's hand tightly.
"What's wrong, Chris?" Joey asked. "Feeling outnumbered?"
"Kind of," Chris answered, looking around. "Joey and I are the last straight guys in the band."
"I'm bi," Justin said quietly, leaning against Lance.
"I'm not," Lance giggled, holding Justin against him. "And we're not out, ok?"
The others all nodded, and they finished the ride to the hotel quietly. JC was leaning back against Jack now, his eyes drifting closed. Every time his head dipped down, he would snap awake, trying to keep watching, but his natural tendency kept taking over. Justin rested against Lance, the song and everything that went with it taking a lot more out of him than he'd thought it would, and Lance held onto him, content with the familiar weight at his side, wondering how either of them could have ever thought something that felt this natural wasn't meant to be. Joey and Chris glanced at each other, looking at everybody else paired up, and split the paper at the back table. They piled off the bus as a group, all of them a little sleepy, since it had been such a long, intense day, and rode up crowded into the same small elevator, leaning against each other before they split up in the hallway. Justin paused as they got out, pulling Lance aside.
"Can I, um, move back into your room tonight?" Justin asked.
"Of course you can," Lance answered. "You didn't have to ask, Justin."
"Yeah, I did," Justin answered. "Moving out was a dumb thing, and I know it bothered you. I can't just move back in without telling you I'm sorry."
"You already said that," Lance said, hugging him. "Come on. I'll help carry your bags."
"Can Junior sleep with us tonight?" Justin asked.
"Sure," Lance answered. "We'll get him when we're all done, ok?"
Once they were settled in their room, Junior lying on the bed with his tail wagging slowly, waiting for them to climb in, Justin went into the bathroom to brush his teeth, and Lance stripped down to his boxers, waiting to go in and brush his as well once Justin was done. Usually Justin changed into his pajamas while Lance did that, and then they climbed into bed and fell asleep together, but Justin seemed to be taking an extremely long time tonight. Lance glanced at the clock by the bed, and realized that Justin had been in there for almost ten minutes, and walked over to tap softly on the door.
"Justin?" he asked, listening.
"Just a second," Justin said, and then he pulled the door open. He wasn't crying, but Lance thought he might be about to, and his face was very pale. He picked nervously at the front of his shirt, removing invisible lint, and Lance could see that his hand was shaking, too.
"Justin, what's wrong?" Lance asked.
"I'm scared," Justin said, swallowing. "I know you won't hurt me, and that you promised, but I'm still scared, Lance. I still, I can't think about it, about doing, you know, doing that, the stuff, even with you, Lance."
"Justin, come sit down, ok?" Lance asked, guiding him to the bed. Justin sat, still watching Lance, his lip quivering, and Lance took his hand. "Now, nobody said anything about doing anything, Justin."
"But you're," Justin began, swallowing. "You're my boyfriend, now, and boyfriends, they, you know, they do stuff. I can't do it, Lance. I know you won't hurt me, and that you'll protect me, but I just, I can't do that."
"I'm not asking you to, Justin," Lance said, smoothing his hand over Justin's hair. Justin nuzzled against it, still shaking. "I love you, Justin. That's all I'm asking for. I want to be with you, and love you, and protect you. That's all."
"But that's, it's not right," Justin said, shaking his head. "You shouldn't have to, to go without, to not have a real relationship, because of the way I am."
"You're not hearing me, Justin," Lance said. "I love you. That means I love everything about you, even then way you are now. I told you, promised you, that I'll always be here for you, and I'll never hurt you, Justin. I'll never ask for something from you that you aren't ready to give, and I'll never regret it, either."
"I won't always be like this," Justin said emphatically, shaking his head. "I won't, Lance. Someday I'll get better, I will. I want to, I want to so badly. I want to hold you, and touch you, and not think about it. I want to make you happy, and I want to let you make me happy, too. I swear I do, Lance. I just can't right now."
"I know," Lance said, pulling Justin against him. "And I love you enough to wait, Justin. I'll wait my whole life for you if I have to, because I love you. Tonight, if all you want to do is lay here together, like we used to, that's fine with me. I want whatever you want. Hell, if you want me to sleep on the couch I will, Justin. I'll do whatever you ask me to, and whatever you need."
"I, I don't want you to sleep on the couch," Justin said quietly, smiling at him. "I want you to sleep in the bed with me."
"Then that's what I'll do," Lance said, standing. "Now, why don't you get ready for bed, and I'll go brush my teeth."
"OK," Justin said, nodding.
When Lance came out of the bathroom a few minutes later, Justin was already in bed, one arm wrapped around Junior, who huddled against his stomach, and Lance flicked off the lights and walked over to the bed.
"Where do you want me, Justin?" Lance asked.
"Will you hold me?" Justin asked. "Will you hold onto me, and make me feel safe?"
"Sure," Lance answered, sliding into the bed. He pulled the sheets up over them, and Justin slid back, spooning against him, settling into the circle of Lance's arms. Lance hugged him tightly, thinking about how good it felt to have Justin there again.
"Lance?" Justin whispered.
"Yeah?" Lance answered, his breath fluttering over Justin's neck. Justin felt warm and firm through his t-shirt.
"Do you remember what happened before the wedding?" Justin asked. "When we kissed?"
"Yeah," Lance answered carefully.
"You still make me feel safe, Lance," Justin sighed. "You still make me feel safe, and make me feel like someone cares about me."
"You still make me feel special, Justin," Lance said. "Every time you look at me I think about the way you feel about me, and that makes me feel like the luckiest guy in the world."
"I'm still scared, too," Justin whispered. "I'm still afraid, Lance, but I'm less scared when you're here. I love you."
"I love you, too," Lance answered.
"Do you remember when we kissed?" Justin asked again, turning so that he was facing Lance. Lance nodded, seeing the bare sparkle of Justin's eyes in the glow of the night light. "Can I kiss you again?"
"I think I'd like that," Lance answered.
Justin closed his eyes and leaned in, slowly, so slowly, and when his lips finally brushed against Lance's, it was so feathery and light that anyone else would have missed it. Lance, though, felt a shiver run through him, and Justin, his eyes still closed, leaned in a little more, his lips pressing more firmly against Lance's. Lance mirrored Justin's moves, pressing back with his own mouth, following where Justin was comfortable to lead, and then he opened his eyes again as Justin pulled back and turned back around.
"We have to try that again soon," Justin sighed, snuggling close to Lance.
"As many times as you want to," Lance said, grinning.
Justin lay beneath the sheets with Lance's arms around him. He could feel Lance's breath against his neck, and Junior was a warm lump on top of the covers, pressed against his abs. Lance's arms were strong, and smooth, and Justin felt completely safe in them. He could feel Lance's heart beating against his back, Lance's bare chest pressing against his t-shirt. Maybe right now he couldn't think about Lance that way, but someday he would. Someday he would take off his shirt, too, and feel that smooth skin against his own. Someday he would be able to look at Lance that way, and to do the kinds of things he'd done before, the kinds of things he knew how to do so well.
As he felt Lance shift against him he sighed, and hoped that someday would come soon.
Jack
"So," Josh began, draping his arm over me. "What do we do now?"
I smiled contentedly, pressing back against him, feeling his deflated cock brush my bare ass as his arm played idly with my chest, his thumb circling my nipple. Our sweat was drying, and the bed was a nicely tangled mess. Josh's legs and mine were all jumbled together, calves entwining, hair and muscles dancing against each other. Somewhere on the floor, out of my view, was a pile of crumpled tissues and condoms, leftover from Josh making love to me, and then deciding that he felt like doing it again. I had cum twice as well, once in Josh's mouth, and once in his hand, and he had carefully cleaned me off, using as much care as I took with him. Those damned lace up pants were in a pile on the other side of the room, the last item of clothing I'd taken off, and I was right. I did look damned sexy topless in them.
"I think now we go to sleep, unless you want to take a shower," I said, snuggling against him as he cuddled me. "I know we don't make love again. I don't think I could get it up again after that."
"You never know," Josh whispered, running a hand down my abs. He wrapped a hand around my cock and gave it a light caress. "I bet if I kept doing this you're be ready again."
"Or I'd get a friction burn," I said, chuckling.
"I mean it, though," Josh sighed. "Not about you being up for it again, but about the rest of it. What do you think's going to happen now?"
"Other than sleeping?" I asked. "You'll drool on the pillow, and I'll probably snore."
Josh giggled, squeezing me tightly, and then took a deep breath. I felt his chest flatten against my back, and I sighed as well.
"Do you think Justin and Lance are going to be ok?" Josh asked. "I want them to be happy, and they care about each other so much. Do you think they'll be all right?"
"I think so," I answered. "They're too good for each other for it not to work out. Right now, they're probably holding hands, and talking about the way they feel."
"You think they'll do more than talk someday?" Josh asked. I'd been wondering about the same thing, actually.
"They will," I said, shrugging. "They're going to circle around it for a while, since they're so careful, and Justin isn't ready. Once he is though, and they get down to it, they'll put us to shame, Josh. Lance's brain is going to melt once Justin gets back in gear."
"They don't want to come out," Josh said. "That might hurt them, a little."
"I don't think it will," I said, shrugging. "They can be themselves around us, and Lance wants to take it really slow. His family kind of distanced themselves when he told them about him and Howie, and Justin still hasn't told his that he's bi."
"I know," Josh said. "I'm so happy mine loves you."
"I am, too," I said, swallowing. "Josh, I've been giving this a lot of thought, and I think maybe it's time I tried to mend fences with my family a little."
"Really?" he asked. "What brought that on?"
"Just, you know, all of this," I said. "Going to find out about my mother, and all that other stuff, well, she wanted me to be happy, Josh. She thought she was giving me a better life, and I feel kind of like I should try to realize that a little more. My whole life it's been really easy to blame my family, but it's not like I've really done a lot to meet them halfway. I'm a grown adult, and maybe it's time I started treating my family that way."
"Wow, this really has affected you," Josh said, kissing the back of my neck. "Whatever you do, I'll be here for you."
"I know," I said, kissing his arm as it curled around below my chin. "Besides, Evelyn actually sort of seems to like you."
"Only because I haven't worn my tiger print coat to the club yet," Josh said, giggling.
"Nor will you," I said sharply, dissolving in giggles as well. The two of us lay there for a while, just holding onto each other, hands roaming lazily to feel and caress, but Josh was in some sort of weird mood.
"What about Chris and Vlada?" Josh asked. "Do you think they'll be ok?"
"They'll be fine," I said. "She's already part of the family, and she's a lot tougher than we give her credit for."
"Those Missouri girls tend to be," Josh said.
"What?" I asked. "Isn't she from, I don't know, eastern Europe? Some sort of Slavic country?"
"The Slavic side of Branson, maybe," Josh said, laughing. "I can't believe Chris never told you that. She's from Missouri, Jack. The accent's part of her persona."
"Does everyone know that?" I asked. "I can't believe nobody brought that up, or let it slip. Hell, I can't believe Vlada never told me."
"There probably just wasn't a right time," Josh said. "Joey and Lance don't know, either. She only told me because I overheard her talking to her mom on the phone once, and she didn't have the accent on."
"I can't believe that," I said. "No wonder Chris loves her so much. She's pranking all of us all the time."
"Yeah," Josh said. "I guess I never thought about it that way, but I think you're right. They'll be ok. Joey and Kelly, too."
"Yup, now that they're back on again," I said. "Bri has great parents."
"Yeah," Josh sighed. "What about us, Jack? What's going to happen to us now?"
I thought about it for a minute.
"Well, someday you guys will stop touring, and you'll probably turn into a bigtime producer and songwriter," I said. "And before you protest, we both know you're too shy to go solo, like Justin. Instead, you'll get to be the next Babyface, and you'll love it."
"Probably," Josh agreed, smiling.
"And we'll still be together," I continued, vividly imagining my fantasy now, rolling it out before me. "I'll give up the speaking thing after a while, too, and settle down into a regular job, with some normal hours, where you and I aren't separated. We'll get a couple dogs, and grow old together, and someday we'll be somebody's really cool uncles."
Neither one of us wanted children. Josh felt like he had a lot to give, but wanted to focus it through their charity work, like the Challenge for the Children, and some other stuff. Neither one of us imagined children for ourselves, and were perfectly content with the idea that we would just spoil Heather or Tyler's kids, or, if I patched things up with my family, we might actually get to spoil my brother's, too. Our house wouldn't ring with the pitter patter of little feet, but it would resonate with the clicking of dog toenails on tile.
"No more drama?" Josh asked, sounding hopeful.
"No, no more drama," I answered, shaking my head. "Everything doesn't have to end with a big, explosive finale, Josh. You and I are just as likely to spend the rest of our lives holding hands, and holding each other. Everything doesn't have to end with a bang. Sometimes it ends with a whimper."
"I like that idea," Josh said, kissing the back of my neck again as he pulled me close.
All of our friends were safe. Everyone loved each other again, and there were no more issues between any of us. Everyone had someone to love, someone to complete them, and I had Josh with me. I pulled Josh's arm across my chest, and felt completely content. I loved him, and he loved me. Everything was going to be ok.
Josh pulled the sheet over us, and we fell asleep.
The end.
Yes, that's right, the end. There won't be another season, or even an epilogue. Thanks, everyone, for reading, and for the tremendous support you've shown.