Greetings everyone,
Here's Chapter 11.
Sorry for taking so long with this chapter. The Fourth holiday threw me off a bit and it did take a little longer to write this one. Thanks again for your support if you've mailed me, I really do appreciate it.
It seems a theme of the mail I've received is not a lot of sympathy for Justin, which is too bad. So with this chapter I will again try to show a side that I hope exists in him.
Anybody catch the gossip in a London tabloid about Justin proposing to Brittany in a New York cafe? Funny that none of the American rags got it...
This story is purely fiction and is not intended to imply anything about the true sexuality of `N Sync or anyone associated with their organization. It is meant for those over the age of 18 only and those who wish to read stories with sexual content.
Jamie's Romance - Chapter Eleven
Jamie sat in stunned silence as the audience applauded. Justin left the stage motioning Jamie to follow him. They went down the hall and into the bathroom for some privacy.
"Justin, what are you doing here?"
Justin stood and looked at Jamie before answering. He drank in the dark reddish brown hair and hazel eyes. All the feelings and emotions he'd been trying to bottle up threatened to overwhelm him now that he was here with Jamie.
"Jamie, I needed to talk to you. My feelings have been eating me up inside and I've tried to forget and move on but I can't." Justin was panting out his words trying to stay in control. His eyes were brimming with tears desperately being held back. "When you left me at the hotel I thought I would die. I hurt so much and I was helpless to get you to talk to me."
"Justin, you know my reasons. I do care for you but I..."
Justin cut him off. "I know why you did it. But now I need you to listen to me because I didn't get a chance before." Jamie looked at Justin in shock, his mouth open. Justin took a deep breath and continued.
"I know you were having a hard time and I hope you are doing better now." Justin looked to Jamie who just nodded. Justin sighed, "That's good to know, but you made a decision last month you had no right making on your own." A questioning look came on Jamie's face. "Shouldn't that have been decided by both of us? You didn't even give me a chance. You didn't even consider my feelings and I think that's what hurt the most. You gave up on whatever we had without even trying."
"Justin, I didn't see you for a month!" Jamie exclaimed in hurt.
"Jamie, I know, and for that I am really sorry. My hands were tied. With the legal troubles, we had to go to every scheduled thing without backing out so we wouldn't give the lawyers an excuse to nail us on the contracts. I know that's a poor excuse, and I can't say I'm sorry enough. I was really looking forward to December because we had most of the month off and I was going to make it up to you, really I was." Justin's voice was cracking, his control slipping. "I would still like to make it up to you," he said in a near whisper.
Jamie's heart was breaking at the tone of Justin' voice. Gone was the confident performer that the whole world loved, all he heard was a hurt and desperate boy trying to make it right.
"Did you spend the whole month thinking about me?" Jamie asked.
Justin swallowed and took a deep breath before answering. "Pretty much. The first week or so I just cried all the time. When I'd call you and leave a message I would be a mess for about an hour after. For the last couple of weeks I've been really depressed. JC and the guys had enough and made me come here tonight."
Jamie looked up at Justin sharply. "You mean you didn't want to come see me?"
Justin answered quickly. "I did, really. I just needed a push to do it. After what you said in December I didn't know how you'd take seeing me." Justin did start crying then. "I guess I was scared of being rejected again," he said softly as Jamie pulled him into his arms.
Jamie's heart melted feeling Justin's in his arms again. "Justin, I've been so stupid. I thought I'd never find anyone who'd care so much about me. And even after all I've done you still want to be with me. Justin, why me?"
Justin stepped back slightly from Jamie to look him in the eye. "Jamie, I always hoped I would find someone to like me for me. And this last year I'd almost convinced myself that because of who I was, I wouldn't. The image sorta gets in the way." Jamie nodded smiling. "But you were different. You accepted me as a friend, just another guy, and I was perfectly happy. Well, over that time we spent together it changed, I know it did for me, but also for both of us, I think."
Jamie nodded tears forming in his eyes. "Justin, I won't deny that I have strong feelings for you. Can you forgive me?"
"Of course I can. I already have. I think I did the day after you left, I really do understand why you did it. You didn't want to get hurt and I could never hurt you. I just wanted to see you to clear the air and maybe have the chance to start over again."
"Justin, can we really start over again?"
Justin smiled. "I'd like to try. I want that so much you don't know."
"Oh, I think I do, Justin, I want it too."
Justin got an impish grin on his face. "Ok then, small steps?" Jamie nodded, a little unsure of Justin's expression.
"Step one then," Justin kidded mimicking an early conversation they had. Justin leaned forward and brushed his lips against Jamie's. Jamie put his hands on Justin's shoulders. They continued tasting each other lips completely lost in the moment. Eventually they broke apart breathing heavy.
"Justin, nobody has ever kissed me like that before," Jamie confessed.
"Same here, it was..."
"Shhh, let's not label things, let's just enjoy it." Jamie put a hand on the back of Justin's neck and pulled him down again.
This time the kiss was more sure, more confident. Justin was surprised and delighted to feel Jamie's tongue lightly trace his lower lip. He followed, letting Jamie set the pace and soon they were in a full passionate embrace, their tongues exploring each other's mouths freely. The world faded away.
"I sure hope they're alright," Lance said over his drink.
"Well neither of them has stormed out yet, so I suppose that's a good sign," Dan chuckled.
"What's taking them so long?" JC seemed a bit uncomfortable.
"What's up, baby?" Lance asked him.
JC blushed. "Well, I sorta have to go to the bathroom."
They laughed at JC's discomfort, which grew by the minute. Finally Lance told him to go before he had an accident.
JC quickly made his way to the bathroom. He hesitated at the door before quietly opening it. He peeked in and saw Jamie and Justin kissing quite passionately. He cleared his throat to get their attention his cheeks starting to blush but they didn't hear him.
"Um, excuse me, but I really need to use the bathroom," he said shyly.
The kiss came to a quick end at the sound of JC's voice. Jamie was swaying on his feet as Justin cleared his throat and shyly looked at JC. "Um, sure JC, sorry."
JC almost ran past Justin and patted his shoulder before going into a stall.
"Come on Jamie, let's go to the table." Jamie nodded still in a fog but he followed. Chip tried to get his attention and asked about his dinner.
Jamie turned to him, "I don't think I'll need it after all, Chip, thanks anyway."
Chip smirked and nodded. 'It's about time we see the kid happy,' he thought to himself.
Dan and Lance made room for them at the table. Dan looked at Jamie clearly expecting him to say something as Lance did the same to Justin.
Curiosity got the better of Lance as JC returned. "Ok, so what's up, you two?"
Jamie smiled and Justin blushed.
"Ok, never mind, I think I know." Lance smirked at them.
Justin was the first to say something. "Yes, James and I are gonna give it a try."
Dan laughed quickly and then choked when Jamie kicked him in the leg. "Um, Justin, you called me that once before and I let it slide but James isn't my name. I actually can't stand being called that. No offense Lance." Lance waved that none was taken.
"What's your name then?" Justin asked looking a little confused.
"It's really Jameson, an old family name."
Something clicked in JC's head. "Oh, that's why Dan called you Sonny?"
Jamie nodded. "Yeah, that's what mostly my family calls me. All my friends called me Jamie and that's what I go by mostly."
Justin smiled broadly.
"What are you smiling like an idiot for, Curly?" Lance asked.
"Oh, I was just thinking how much I'm gonna enjoy learning all these little things."
Jamie blushed as the others giggled.
"So how long you guys in town for?" Dan asked the question he knew was on Jamie's mind.
"Most of the week," answered JC. "We're finishing up some stuff for the album since we're free and clear now."
Jamie perked up. "When's it coming out? I really like 'Bye Bye Bye,' it's been getting a lot of play here in the city."
Lance laughed, "Spoken like a true fan, wait till you see the video on MTV. The album will be out around the beginning of March, they haven't picked a street date yet."
"Actually, the video debuts tomorrow night on 'Making the Video.' We're having a little party to watch and celebrate, would you two like to come?" JC invited them.
Dan was more than enthusiastic. "Hell ya!" he laughed.
Jamie looked to Justin who smiled back at him. "I think Jamie and I have other plans but we'll join you for the show," Justin said.
"Oh, and what plans are those," Jamie asked with a smirk.
"I think it's about time we went on our first official date, don't you?" Justin said as he took Jamie's hand in his and kissed the back of it.
Back at the apartment Dan watched Jamie who was sitting in his own world on the couch.
"Sonny, can we talk?"
Jamie focused on Dan. "Sure, what's on your mind?"
"Well, you for one."
Jamie frowned at Dan. "So what's wrong with me now?"
"Nothing, at least I hope not. I just want you to talk to me. Don't shut me out anymore, bro."
Jamie nodded sadly. "I'm scared, Dan."
Dan smiled and sat next to him. "Well, that's normal, nothing wrong there," he said putting his arm around his brother.
"He's just so perfect, maybe too perfect. That's what scares me. It makes me wonder what I'm not seeing, when will I see him be not perfect."
Dan laughed softly. "You're not saying anything that hasn't been said by someone else before, you know."
Jamie nodded. "I know. I don't want to hurt him."
Dan frowned. "That's not it, I know you better than that. You don't want to get hurt, that's what you're thinking isn't it?"
Jamie sighed. "I can't hide anything from you, can I?" Dan shook his head smiling at Jamie.
"Jamie, listen. You can't go through the rest of your life wondering if you're gonna get hurt or not. You may or may not, you never know. But you're not really living if you don't take the chance. And to be perfectly honest, I think Justin is worth that chance."
"But what if it doesn't work?"
"Then it doesn't work and you both move on. There aren't any guarantees, Jamie, you know that."
Jamie sighed. "I know." He slumped down and put his head in Dan's lap, something that he hadn't done with his brother since they were kids.
"Now I know you're troubled, Sonny. You haven't needed this kind of comforting since you were, what, 9 or so?"
Jamie smiled. "Ya, when I had a nightmare or there was a thunderstorm you'd always be there."
Dan rubbed Jamie's back. "Well, I'm always here for ya kiddo. I'm real glad you're living here. I've missed seeing you."
"Same here, Danno," Jamie yawned.
They both got up and headed to their bedrooms. In the hall Jamie stopped Dan.
"Hey, do you have to work tomorrow?"
Dan thought for a minute. "I do need to go in but I'll be done for the day at lunchtime."
"How about I meet you for lunch and we can go shopping."
"Shopping?"
"Yes, you don't expect me to go out to dinner with an international superstar with my ratty old clothes, do you? And Justin said to dress nice."
Dan laughed and pulled Jamie into a hug. "Sounds like a plan, little bro."
Jamie hugged Dan back. "I love you, Dan, thanks for being my brother."
"I love you too, imp, but I didn't have a whole lot of choice about being your brother." Dan laughed as Jamie swatted Dan's back. "On the whole, I think it worked out ok."
The suite was alive with activity as Justin got ready for his date with Jamie. The other members of `N Sync watched as Justin changed into one outfit after another running from room to room for opinions.
"I bet ya $10 he changes again," Joey prodded Chris.
"No way, that's a sucker bet," Chris laughed. "You know he's gonna change again."
Joey nodded while thinking. "Ok, how about this. I bet he changes at least 3 more times."
A gleam came into Chris' eye. "You're on, I'll say only 2 more times," Chris added eyeing the clock and seeing it at 6:45. He reached over and shook Joey's hand.
Lance came through the door and noticed the handshake. "Not another bet?"
Joey and Chris looked at him innocently. "Who us?" they said together then broke down laughing.
Justin came into the main room clearly nervous. "JC, how's this one?" he asked as JC came out from his room.
"That looks good, J."
"Just `good'? Aaarggh!" Justin cried running back into his bedroom.
"That's one," said Chris and JC looked at him strangely.
"I think I should go help," JC said as he ran after Justin.
"Looks like I'm gonna win, Joey," Chris said with a smirk.
"We'll see, we'll see," Joey answered, not sounding at all sure.
"I don't think I've seen him so excited and nervous about anything for a long time," Lance remarked.
Joey agreed, "It's almost like we've got the old Justin back, I like it."
Finally JC and Justin came back into the room. Justin was wearing a light blue silk shirt, open at the collar, a matching darker blue jacket with some dark brown linen pants. He stood for a second before modeling for his friends.
"What do you think?" he asked shyly.
"You look great, Justin," Lance said appreciatively.
"Very fly," Chris agreed. "Number 2," he said softly to Joey.
Joey nodded handing Chris a $10 bill. "That's the outfit, Curly."
Justin smiled, looked at the clock and frowned. "Now I only have 5 minutes to fix my hair," he yelled as he ran to the bathroom. The rest of `N Sync just laughed.
Meanwhile Jamie and Dan had arrived at the hotel and were stopped by security. Soon they were entering an elevator after being checked against a list.
"How do I look, Dan?" Jamie asked as they rose up into the hotel.
Dan took an appreciative look at his brother. "Not bad at all, studly," he kidded.
Jamie laughed and punched Dan in the arm. "Smart ass."
Jamie did look good. They had finally decided on J Crew and looked at just about everything in the store before choosing an outfit: a green dress shirt, a thin light brown tweed jacket, and charcoal gray slacks.
Jamie whistled nervously as the elevator reached the 18th floor. The door opened with a ding and they stepped out to be met with a well-built man obviously part of the security.
"Hi there, my name's Lonnie. You must be Jamie and Dan," he said pleasantly shaking each of their hands. "Please follow me."
He led them down the hall to the suite, knocked twice and opened the door. "There you go, have a pleasant evening," he said smiling at them.
Jamie and Dan entered the suite and were met immediately by Lance and Chris who pulled them into the main room.
Chris hugged Jamie enthusiastically. "Man, it's great to see you."
Jamie laughed at Chris. "It's good to see you too, buddy."
Joey came up and gave Jamie a big hug. "Hey squirt!"
"Hey, Phat One, how goes it?" Joey smiled and Jamie nodded. "Hey guys, I'd like you to meet my older brother Dan. Dan, you've met Lance and JC. This is Chris and Joey."
"Nice to meetcha, guys." Dan smiled as he held out his hand.
"Any brother of Jamie is a brother to us," smiled Joey and pulled Dan into a hug, as did Chris.
"So what are you guys gonna do tonight?" Jamie asked.
"We're eating in the hotel restaurant and then coming back up here," answered Lance.
"Any idea what Justin has planned?" Jamie asked.
Lance poked him in the side. "Uh uh, you're not gonna get me to spill. Besides we don't know anything, he's been pretty close about it." Lance smiled at Jamie and put his arm around his shoulder and leaned in conspiratorially. "But I will tell you this, when Justin plans a surprise it's usually a good one."
Jamie smiled and gave JC a hug when he came in the room.
"Justin's almost ready, Jamie." Jamie nodded growing a little nervous. JC sensed this and tried to lighten the mood a little. "He's fussing with his hair."
They all laughed and Jamie felt better. It sounded to him like Justin was just as nervous as he was. It was just as Jamie had that thought that Justin came into the room and Jamie's heart stopped. My God, he's so handsome,' he thought to himself, then added guiltily, and hot!'
Justin was thinking the same thing as they both just looked at each other without saying a word.
The others just waited to see who would move first.
tbc....
There's the latest. Comments and suggestions are always welcome!
Jim bangoremail@aol.com