This is a work of pure fiction, , but based on the author's feelings, beliefs, and in some cases, experience. Come to think of it -- it might not be very pure either! There may be graphic sexual encounters at times between men, so if this offends you, you are invited to retreat. If you are too young or it is otherwise illegal for you to be reading this kind if story, shame on you for reading it - - please stop here. If not, - - ENJOY!
Cast of Characters:
James Thomas Arthur (Jamey)
Harold Brian Arthur -- Jamey's Brother (Habby)
Harold Garfield Arthur -- Jamey's dad
William Pitts -- Roommate (Will)
Ronny -- Will's best friend.
George Wiggins
Darrel -- George's roommate
Dr. Steve Jordan - Doctor
From Chapter 8:
As he dropped me off, I said, "Steve -- do you think you'll hear anything about the funeral? From Will's mom's actions there at the hospital, I doubt she will want me there."
"You need to go -- regardless! If she recognizes you -- too bad. Just hang back and respect her space and - - maybe she'll respect yours. I'm not usually privy to funeral arrangements after the body is taken to the morgue, but if I hear anything, I'll tell you for sure. I'll see what I can do."
"Thanks! And - - omigosh, how can I think you enough for what you have done for me since -- since -- the other night. Thanks!"
"We'll be in touch!" he said and he sped off.
Chapter 9
I stood and watched as the rear of his Mercedes got smaller and smaller and finally turned where I could no longer follow it. I looked around the campus near the dorm. Not a soul was stirring. It wasn't that early, but it WAS Sunday. Last night's wind had blown in an overcast sky. Everything looked grey. I sighed and walked up the steps into the main entry.
There was soft music playing as I walked in. I never had heard it before, but it had never been this quiet before. As I was unlocking my room door, John from across the hall came out his door. "Hey!" he said in a loud whisper. "I heard about your roommate. Unreal!"
"Yeah." I agreed. John was about 5'-10" tall, and maybe 200 pounds. Pretty hefty, but looked like a wrestler or something. He had a kind of cute baby face with blond hair.
"Were you very close to him? I had no idea he was gay! Boy, he kept that under covers. Did you know?" He said smiling. John had no way of knowing how close we were. I tried to be non-committal.
"I was his roommate the past few months. Of course I knew. And -- yeah, I was pretty close -- er --knew him pretty well."
"God, I'm sorry Dude! That's gotta be a shock and a half! I mean -- you know? I got nothing' against gays, but -- it woulda made me nervous to be his room mate. Gotta hand it to yah!"
I considered it for a long moment. Then I said, "I'm gay, John."
"Oh! Geez! Didn't see that one coming."
"If you knew me better, you would have."
"Um -- yeah! Hey! Maybe we should get together sometime and discuss it further. Um -- well -- I gotta go -- Mom's expecting me for brunch. Gotta go all the way to Paramount."
"Really?" I said. "I'm from Bellflower!"
"No duh? Now I know we need to talk. See yah! "
"See yah." I watched him walk away down the hall to the main room and as he turned the corner, I turned the key in my lock. I closed my eyes and pushed the door slowly open. I walked in with my eyes closed. I didn't need them open. I knew where I was going. I sat down on his bed. I put my face in my hands and opened my eyes. I lifted my head.
The room looked exactly as I had left it last night - - of course. There was his pillow that I had cried in last night. I felt it. It was dry. I brought it up to my face. Feelings flooded over me as I smelled his familiar smell again. I closed my eyes and breathed it in deeply. I kicked off my shoes and fell on to my back and covered my face with the pillow, still breathing deeply.
I got up and carefully pulled back the covers. I put my face on the middle of the bed and inhaled through my nose again. His heady, sexy smell was all over the sheets, but here in the middle, it was the strongest. The last time he was here, we had - -
I started to sob again. I got up, ran out the door in my socks, slamming the door and ran out the main door and out under a tree. I collapsed onto my knees on the soft cold grass. In a fetal position, I cried and cried -- for about ten minutes. I felt a hand on my shoulder.
"I'm sorry we didn't get here sooner, Jamey." My dad's voice said. "I didn't want to wake you if you had gotten to sleep last night." He assisted me in getting to my feet. Habby was with him, looking crushed to see me in this condition. He looked at me as if he wanted to cry too, but didn't. He shrugged his shoulders. I beckoned for him. He ran to me and threw himself into my embrace. Then he started to ball.
"Let's go in." Dad said.
I let him lead me back to the room. As soon as the door was open, and I saw the sheets all stripped down low, I stepped quickly to the bed and pulled them up and put the pillow back in it's place.
"You guys traded beds? You were in that one weren't you?" Habby said. I was stunned. My bed was made and obviously not slept in.
"Lets get these sheets and stuff outa here!" Dad said, understanding exactly what was happening.
"NO!" I commanded. "I mean -- not yet, dad. I'm not ready to -- to -- to -- let them -- go. But -- but -- it's good that you're here. I couldn't bear to come back in here this morning. I - "
"This morning?" Habby said. "Didn't you stay here last night?"
"I -- er -- um -- I mean -- Will's doctor let me stay with him last night -- at his house."
"Oh." He said, seemingly accepting it on the surface.
"This doctor must be some nice guy!" Dad said.
"He's never done that before." I said. "He said he was worried about me. I was supposed to come back last night -- after he got off work. But I fell asleep with the patio door open and got a minor case of hypothermia. He refused to bring me home. He kept me there and got me warm."
"He got you warm?" Habby grinned.
"Habby!" dad warned. "So -- you're okay this morning?" Dad said.
"I guess that's relative -- seeing as how you found me when you arrived." I said with a humorless chuckle. "Yeah, I'm okay that way. He fed me breakfast and then brought me home. I came back in earlier, but I just couldn't do it alone. Where's Darrel? Or was it George?"
"What? Darrel? George?" He queried.
"I thought one of them was gonna help bring the car back."
"Oh! No. We couldn't figure a way to get all the cars here, so I decided to just drive down with Habby and we'll go home on the bus."
"Oh Crap! Dad!"
"We'll be fine! Hab's never been on a Greyhound."
"Not an experience that's exactly exciting!" I said . "And - - Mom might worry -- KIDDING!"
"Good! So -- It's Sunday! Anywhere we can go?"
"Not in my little car!" I said.
"Oh! I hadn't thought about that!" Dad said, embarrassed. Habby looked disgusted.
My phone vibrated. I looked at the caller I.D. No one I recognized. "Hello?"
"Is this James?" said a woman's voice.
"It is." I said.
"Doctor Jordan said you were a good friend of William's." She said tersely.
"Who's this?"
"This is William's mother. We met in the hospital."
"Oh!" I was completely taken aback. My knees started to buckle.
"Dr. Jordan personally called to tell me that you deserve to be a pall bearer. That William would want it that way. I just don't know what to think, James, considering your relationship and all with William. But you don't need this right now -- and truthfully -- neither do I. Will you consent to honor my son with your presence at the funeral Friday morning -- and help carry his remains to their final resting place?"
My heart was so full of so many things, I could hardly breath -- let alone speak. I started to try to talk. I choked. In a raspy hoarse voice, I said, "Of course. Where will it be?"
"Dr. Jordan has taken a personal interest in this -- for some reason -- and I am grateful to him for it. But anyway, he said he will inform you of whatever you need to know. Thank you for -- for -- thank you!"
She hung up. I again was stunned. I again collapsed on Will's bed. "Jamey? What just happened?" Said Dad.
By this time I was choking I was crying so hard. "N -- n -- n -- nothing sh -- sh -- short of a mir -- mir -- miracle!" I sputtered. "Oh Dad! I just don't know what to say about St -- St -- Steve." I got a little calmed down and was able to explain the phone call.
"Sounds like you owe him - - a lot!" Dad said. "You better call him -- now -- and thank him. Sounds like he's been a busy boy this morning."
I sat up. I tried to breath deeply and choked some more. Tears were still coursing down my face. I inhaled several times as deeply as I could and coughed hard. Then I found Steve's card -- still on Wills bedside table.
"Steve? Omigod! What can I say to you? There are no words that can tell you - " I had to stop to choke on some more tears and cough some more. "I just don't know! Why are you such -- such -- Just a minute!" I grabbed a Kleenex and blew my nose -- to clear my nose -- to clear my head -- to clear my brain. I again breathed deep and said, very controlled, "Thank you sooooooo much! Is there anything I can do to ever pay you back for your -- your -- kindness and - " I broke down again.
He said softly, "You already have, Jamey. You don't know what you've done for me already. Even your call right now would be enough -- but you have done so much more! Is your father there now?"
"Yes. And my brother too."
"What do you have planned for today?"
"We were just discussing that when Will's mother called."
"Can -- can I intrude a little in your family time and take you all out to lunch? What time were you planning on eating?"
"Just a minute.' I pushed the mute on the phone. "Dad he wants to take us out to lunch."
"ALL RIGHT!" Said Habby. Dad shook his head.
"If you are okay with it -- I see no problem?" Dad said.
"Steve, you've done so much already - "
"And I have gotten so much value from what I've -- WE -- have done. Can we do this, this afternoon? I know a great seafood place -- with a very nice patio. And it looks as though the sun will be giving us a visit this afternoon! What're you doing this morning until lunch?"
"Probably just hanging out here for awhile." I said. We really didn't have too much choice with our car situation.
"You really ought to go down to the beach! It's cool but in the fall, - if the sun's up -- it's pretty nice. You gat a clear view of the islands -- because there is very little haze after summer."
"We - we're kind of stuck here, Steve. It's okay."
"Stuck? Why?"
DAMN! I didn't want to tell him this!
"MY Z isn't big enough for all three of us."
"You have a Z?" He said enthusiastically? What year?"
I honestly could not think straight enough to think of the year! "2000 -- I think. But it's like new!"
"I've been THINKING of buying one! Can I borrow it for a spin -- say for a couple hours? I'd be very careful!"
"Of course but - "
That way, you can use my car while I am test driving your's. Is it a convertible?
"No."
"Perfect. I don't like all the noise. Would that work for you guys?"
"As usual, I seem to be getting the better deal here!" I said, knowing exactly what he was doing.
"I'll be there in 20 minutes!" he said.
I told my dad his plan. He was pleased until Steve got there and we walked out to the car. "Dad this is Steve -- DOCTOR Steve -- Jordan. Steve, this is my dad, Harold Arthur.
"Thank you so much for looking out after my son, Doctor."
"It has been my pleasure for sure, Harold. And please call me Steve! I have learned a lot from Jamey. Your son seems to have picked up a lot in his short years." Then we got to his car, and dad saw what we would be driving,
"Now wait a minute!" Dad said. "When Jamey told me we would be trading cars, I am afraid I wasn't expecting anything like this. I hate to embarrass anyone, but this is a $67 - 70,000 car. I can't be responsible for that. And I would be the responsible adult here." Dad didn't leave any room for argument."
Steve picked up on his concern immediately. "Okay, I guess I have a confession to make here. I have no interest in driving a `Z'! I was going to suggest this to begin with, but I didn't want to intrude on your family time. Would you be amenable to letting me be your chauffer for the day? I'd be honored if you would."
"Thank you, Steve! You're very kind." Dad said. "You must have many things you could be doing."
"I'm almost embarrassed to tell you - - I don't. I've been telling Jamey how most of my time has been consumed by my education, my internship and my residency. I have reached a point in my residency where I have a little free time for the first time in about 15 years and I don't know what to do with it! So if it would please you -- it damn sure would please ME to intrude on your family time for this few hours."
"I wonder if you shouldn't have been a lawyer!" Dad joked.
"You're very kind sir."
"I'm sure I am not more than 5 to ten years older than you, Steve. Please call ME Hal."
"Thank you Hal! Shall we go to the beach?"
"What's at the beach this time of year?" Habby asked.
"I think you'll like it a lot -- Habby is it?" Habby beamed. "The sand, on a day like this, is warm on the top -- from the sun -- and cold beneath. It feels good on your feet."
We all got into his car and he drove us to a nearby beach. We got out, removed our shoes and socks and walked down the beach. It was pretty quiet at first, but Steve broke the silence. "How was it going in to your place this morning, Jame?"
"I couldn't stay there. Too intense, I guess. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been there to help me."
"You would have been okay." Steve said. "I dunno. I guess things just happened to line up right. I've never done this kind of thing before. Never had time before! It's pretty pathetic. Now that I have some time, I don't have anything exciting to do."
"Maybe there's a good reason -- that you were free right now!" Habby said. I looked at Dad and he was scowling. I could tell that maybe Habby was gonna have a "talk with the old man" later on.
I was also a little embarrassed by the obvious implication. But Habby is only 15. I know Dad realizes that too. Then Steve said,
"That's the only explanation I can think of, Habby. I don't know if God brought us together, but for whatever reason, we both needed something -- and that something was provided -- in each other."
My mind was going wild. What was Steve saying? Am I crazy or is he actually -
"I mean obviously, Jamey needed someone to comfort him, Habby." Steve was obviously not only talking to Habby! "But I was feeling like I needed something at the same time. I needed someone to talk to. I didn't grow up here, or go to this University, so I don't know many people. And Jamey seemed to have something I needed. I mean, I'm in a position to help people every day. So -- it wasn't a need to serve or anything. But for some reason, we just hit it off. I don't know if you can understand - "
"Oh, I understand okay!" Habby said. "Last year, I met this kid. He was always around, but I didn't know him well. But we were just kinda left together for an afternoon in study hall. We really shared a lot of ourselves with each other. Yeah! That's what Mr. Hannah woulda said. Mr. Hannah is my psychology teacher. Anyway, we didn't get any studying done -- and I still see him all the time, but we hardly ever talk and never hang out together. We just both needed something that one day in study hall."
"It could be like that." Steve said.
"I think that people are put in our lives often to teach us something." Said Dad. "And sometimes it is -- like you were saying -- for comfort. Whether you call it God or `the force' or whatever, it seems to me to be too orchestrated to always be coincidence.
"Do you think God put Will in my life -- to teach me something?" I asked. "And if so, why take him away so quickly? Isn't it interesting? Will gets killed, but he's not the one who suffers because of it."
"Interesting?" Habby repeated. "Is that what it is to you?"
I could feel dad's disgust and sorrow over Habby's apparent tactlessness. I wanted to save Habby though. His questions are good. Dad would not say anything because Steve was there. So I answered Habby.
"Hab, of course it's much more than interesting to me. It's - " I stopped walking and started to hyperventilate to keep from crying again. It didn't work. I continued anyway, crying as I said, "Habby, I love you so much! I really love that you ask the questions that I am afraid to ask myself. It's interesting and it hurts -- probably more than anything has ever hurt me. You were too young when Mom died, and you don't remember how often and how long you cried and missed her. I remember it. I picked up on something Dad said, and -- for me -- I coped with it by bringing her back -- in my fantasy.
"Now the fantasy is gone, Hab. In a few days -- I've lost both Mom -- again -- and Will." I had to stop talking. Habby started to cry too, and that was too much for me. I pulled him into a warm hug. We are the same height, so our heads fit neatly into each other's necks.
The beach was nearly deserted. I felt tears from us both land on my feet. "Why!" Habby said. "Why do people have to get hurt? Why?" He sobbed. I patted him on the back. He reciprocated. I have no idea what Dad and Steve were doing or how they were reacting. I was in the moment with my little brother!
"I don't know if there is an answer for it, Hab." I said. "But it surely has shown me how much my little brother loves me! And I love you too, Hab! Sooooo much!"
Dad interjected, "So -- will you need someone here on Friday, Jamey? I could probably get it off, but - "
"I think I'll be okay -- really." I said.
"Hey!" Habby said. Friday is a prep day for the teachers. I have it off! Can I come and stay with you Thursday night?"
He looked at dad also for approval. Dad looked disapproving at first. "I don't know - " He said.
"Oh PLEASE, Dad!" I whined. "I'd really like that!"
"How would he get here?" Dad said.
"He could take the bus!" I said. "That is if Mom wouldn't worry too much!" I added winking at Habby. "Then I could bring him home on Saturday -- sometime!" He winked back at me and grinned.
"Let me think about that for awhile." Dad said.
"What's there to think about, Dad?" Habby protested.
"Habby! Don't push me -- or you won't go!"
Habby turned back to me. "Hear that, Jamey? I'm coming Friday!"
I smiled and this time I winked at Dad, and grinned at him. He relented on the spot. "Aw, shit! You guys know how to gang up on your old man!"
Then Habby turned to Steve. "So are we going to do something next Friday night?"
Steve chuckled. "I'll have to look at my work schedule. I worked the day before yesterday, so -- well, obviously -- so I SHOULD be off." He smiled. "Where would you all like to go for lunch?" He added.
"You've done so much for us already, Steve. Let's call it square, huh?" Dad said.
"Square -- what?" Steve said. "Are we getting even with something? And besides, if you are taking the bus back to L.A., as you said, how were you gonna get to the greyhound station? Please honor me just this little bit more -- until it's time for your bus. What time DO you need to be at the bus station anyway?"
"Actually I don't know! Let me call." Dad whipped out his cell phone and called 411 to be connected to the greyhound terminal. When finished with his call, he said that there was a bus leaving at 3:00 PM and they advised that since it was a Sunday to get there an hour early tom be sure to get a ticket.
"3:00??" Steve whined. "Let's go by there now. It's not much out of the way from anywhere we would go for lunch."
When we got there, Steve said, "You boys sit in the car and I'll show your dad where to get the tickets." I wondered what he was up to. I knew it's not that hard to buy a bus ticket. Dad must have been thinking the same thing, but he was polite enough to keep it to himself.
In a moment, Steve came running out to the car. Opening the door, he said to Habby, "Do you have a lot of homework to finish after you get home tonight -- for tomorrow?"
"No!" Habby said kind of irked. "Dad knew that! He MADE me do it all before he allowed me to come with him today."
Now I KNEW something was up. Steve ran back and in a few minutes they both came back laughing.
"Well," Dad said, "I was busted!" He answered our queried looks with, "There's another bus that leaves at 6:00."
" -- and your dad was trying to get out of letting me buy you all lunch!"
He took us to Holdren's on State Street. I'd seen it many times, but never been in it. It doesn't look like much, but the steaks melt in your mouth!
"Hello! I'm Grant! I'll be your server. Can I start you out with some drinks?" The impeccably dressed waiter said. He had a very VERY cute smile and dimples by his mouth. His eyes were round and as blue as any ocean.
We asked for water around and when he came back, I ordered the top sirloin steak sandwich, Habby ordered fish and chips and both the older men ordered salads.
We took our time with the eating. We laughed and joked and talked a little about the upcoming funeral. Cute Grant came back several times to refill our drinks. He seemed to be making sure he made eye contact with both Habby and me! I was happy to stay on other subjects -- at least over dinner.
When we were finished, Steve took us for a drive up the coast for a bit. It was cold outside, but the sun was bright and with four of us in the car, it was perfect for leaving the windows open. We got Dad and Habby to the Bus depot with about 15 minutes to spare. After we said our goodbyes, Steve took me home. As he parked outside my dorm, he asked, "Are you gonna be okay, Jame?
"I think I'll be okay now. I am so glad Dad and Habby were here! It really helped!"
"I'm glad too!" He said, as he came to a stop. I opened the door. We looked at each other for a prolonged moment. It was hard for me to leave.
"Thanks for everything, Steve. You don't know how good you have made me feel."
"Actually I think I might. Well, if you need anything, please call me. I'll be at work tonight again, so if you are awake and need someone to talk to -- or anything let me know. I'll stop by on the way home from work."
"Thanks -- again -- Steve! You've done too much already! Bye!" I quickly closed the door and hurried into the building. He didn't move his car until I was all the way in.
Truth be told, I dreaded going up there again, alone. I went to the soda machine and got an orange soda. John passed me again. "How're yah doin, Dude?" He said.
I took a big swallow of soda and said, "I'm okay. You? How was brunch?"
"Sometimes I get -- I dunno" He said as if to say, "glad you asked", he continued, " -- Sundays are sometimes hard. I don't much appreciate coming back." I took a second look at John. He just didn't look the type to so easily open up.
He dropped some coins in the soda machine and retrieved one for himself. As we passed the common area, he stopped and sat down. "Dude -- what's your name?"
"Jamey."
"Oh. Jamey, do you feel like sitting for a few minutes and talking?"
"I -- erm -- uh -- I guess." I sat across from him.
"I didn't mean to offend you earlier. I really meant what I said. I don't have anything against gays. Just don't understand it is all."
"Yeah. Thanks. ME neither." I chuckled.
"Huh?"
"I don't understand what makes you attracted to girls -- when I have such a strong attraction to guys. Well - - SOME guys. What is it that you like about being with a girl?"
"I -- um -- I like girls okay."
"No -- I mean can you really describe what it's like to be with one? To kiss her? Do things with her?"
"No."
"No?" I repeated. "No what?"
"No, I can't describe it." He said.
"See?" I said. "So how could either of us understand what its like to -- be with -- one sex -- when all we've ever been with is other?"
"I've never been with either. I mean - "
"You've never kissed a girl?"
"No." he said and he turned beet red.
"Dude!" I exclaimed. He got even redder. "So -- we have something in common!" I said.
"Ha! Neither of us has ever kissed a girl! Haha!" He laughed. "HAHAHAHAHA!"
"No, that's not it." I said. "I was a virgin when I came here too."
"Oh!" he perked up. "And are you still?" He turned red again.
"N-not exactly."
"Did you and -- Will -- ever - - " He said and stopped abruptly, "Oh! Never mind! That was a stupid - "
"Will and I were going together." I said.
"Oh! Damn! I'm sorry! I had no idea!"
"I know. No one did. Actually it was just since last week." That echoed in my head over and over: "-just since last week". He asked something else and part of me answered not really paying attention, while I was thinking,
"How is it that I could become so attached to a guy I just met 3 months ago? And before Will, I thought I was in love with every guy that - " I was thinking
"Oh! Sorry guy, I'm sure you are too -- um -- busy or -- um -- preoccupied or something to waste time with my idiotic questions!" he said.
"No! It's okay - - really!" I said. "I guess I WAS kind of wrapped up in my own little reverie."
"Yeah. Sorry to bother you." He started to get up.
"Wait!" I begged. "I -- I mean -- to tell the truth, I was dreading going back up there alone -- to our room."
Tears filled my eyes again. It was only two days and it seemed like an eternity of tears and aching heart.
"Is - - is there anything I can do -- for you, Jamey?"
"I don't -- know. I'm sorry, I don't want to bring you down! I guess I just have to go up and do it."
"I'll walk up with you." He said, and we got up. "Who was it that dropped you off? Nice car!"
"My dad says those cost 65,000 bucks!"
"I was kind of -- sorry, but -- mesmerized, as I saw you outside. I was torn between watching the car and -- watching you watch it drive away until it disappeared. Nice car!"
"Yeah." I said. "Nice driver too. He was Will's doctor. We kind of hit it off being so close when Will was trying so hard to - " I again choked on my words, as I turned to unlock my door. When I went in, he followed, leaving the door open.
"You gonna be okay?" he asked.
"Sure. It's hard, though. Everything I see in here reminds me of him."
"Um -- do you wanna -- um -- I mean -- Jerry -- my roomie -- is commuting from home for awhile. His gramma is sick and they need his help there at night. Do you wanna stay over at my place for -- a little while?"
I gave a shuddering sigh. "I -- no! I mean, you're cool for asking, John, but I need to be here." I looked into his face -- to see whether I trusted him enough to share this next statement. I decided I trusted him. "This is kinda crazy, but -- I want to -- sleep in his bed -- where I can smell him. God I miss him!"
"Actually that doesn't sound all that crazy to me. Well, hey, Jamey, I'm right across the hall if you get lone -- er -- if you need anything. See yah, Bud!" He left and closed the door. Part of me didn't want him to go and part of me was relieved.
I lay on his bed and again brought his scent filled pillow up to my nose. I willed myself to relax, breathed deep and was nearly asleep when there was loud knocking on my door. I sprang up and since I was still fully clothed except for my shoes, I opened the door. A man stood there dressed in a suit and tie. It was obvious that he had awakened me.
"Sorry to bother you, sir, but isn't this William Pitts room?"
"It was." I said.
"I'm investigating his murder. Did you know him well?"
"Well, yeah -- he WAS my roommate." I said. He walked around me into the room.
"So -- that must be his bed, huh?" He said pointing to my made up bed. "Get that!" he said to a photographer, who almost pushed me out of the way and shot a picture of my bed.
"Hey!" I said, and I grabbed the photographer and muscled him back out of the room. I was beginning to suspect there was something else going on -- other than what I assumed. I stood firmly in the doorway and turned on what I assumed was a detective. Who are you?" I demanded.
"I told you, I'm investigating - "
"I didn't ASK what you were doing, I ASKED who you are!" I repeated.
"I'm Lars Olsen! Now can I get on with my - "
"Can I see some identification?" It had just hit me: an officer of the law would have shown me his badge up front.
"Look, Sir, I'm with the West Coast Inquirer and - "
"GET OUT!" I yelled, and I stepped aside for him to leave.
"But Sir -- if you cooperate - "
I grabbed him and dragged him out. The photographer's camera was flashing all the while. I shut the door soundly! I fell back against the door. As I was still standing there, leaning on the door, a small knock.
"Go AWAY! I DON'T want to talk to you!"
"Jamey! It's John!" I opened the door a little. John was standing there in his boxer shorts - only. "What happened? I was reading, with my earphones on, and I heard something going on out here. I had just gotten another soda and was going in my room when I saw the detective. I thought I should mind my own business, so I went into my room. Before I knew it there was all this clattering going on in the hall. You okay?"
"Well, they looked like detectives to me too. It was a reporter from the West Coast Inquirer! Scum bags! He took a picture of my bed!"
"Why did he do that?" John asked.
"He assumed it was Will's."
"Ah yes! A picture of the dead gay guys bed. Perfect stuff for that rag! Well, if everything's okay, I'll go back to my - "
"What were you reading?" I asked.
He looked embarrassed. Finally he admitted, "Harry Potter".
"Oh." I said, noncommittal.
"Have you read them?" He said, sounding hopeful.
"Naw. But - - are you gonna go back to reading?"
"I -- suppose."
"Would you -- um -- mind -- would you mind reading it over here? I just don't wanna be alone right now."
"Sure! Okay if I bring my MP-3 player? -- uh -- or did you want to talk?"
"Naw, you can read -- and listen! I'm just gonna lay back down anyway. I just -- can't bear to be alone -- right now."
"No Problem. Be right back!" He said as he dashed across to his bedroom and got his book and his MP-3 player -- and a tee shirt.
He looked around the room and then started to sit on the chair next to Will's bed. "You can lay on my bed if you want." I said, pointing to it.
"Thanks, but I can't read lying down. Fall asleep every time." He sat and opened his book. "So - - you're going to sleep?"
"I might." I said as I lay back down on Wills bed. I felt a little intimidated to hug and sniff his pillow with John there, but I could still smell Will. He put his ear phones in and smiled at me as he started reading. I turned onto my side -- it was easier to smell the pillow that way -- and half closed my eyes. John looked over once again, and smiled reassuringly. I mostly closed my eyes. He went back to reading his book.
I watched him through the slits of my mostly closed eyes. I could smell Will, and at the same time, was rather liking watching John. HE was much better looking than Will, and though he was a pretty husky guy, he didn't have the paunch that Will had. He crossed his legs, and shifted his groin with his hand. I felt that in my own groin. That was the last thing I remember before falling asleep.
I woke up and looked at my clock. It was easy to see because the room was still light. It was 11:42 PM. I turned over and John was sprawled out on the chair, Harry Potter was on the floor, and he was sound asleep, light glaring.
"John?" I said softly. "John. You fell asleep."
"Wha - ? Oh! Yeah! I guess I did. You - - okay?"
"I think so -- yeah."
"Okay. Listen Dude, mind if I just crash over on top of your bed?"
"It'll get cold by morning. I promise -- there's no cooties or gay bugs in it! You can cover up!" He grinned. He got up holding his wood so it didn't pop out and went to the toilet. That got me to rubbing my own as I listened to him peeing, and keeping that last image in my head. He padded back and turned off the light.
Somehow with the light off, memories flooded back unabated. I grabbed the pillow and brought it up to my nose. I started to breathe more shallow, and before I knew it, I was wiping tears off my face with the pillow. How could he be here just a couple days ago. Literally here, cuddled up next to me -- and now he's gone!
I thought I was crying softly. Before too long I felt the bed sag and then I felt a hand on my shoulder. He rubbed it and said, "Dude -- Jamey -- This must be so hard for you! I wish there was something I could do!"
"You're doing -- fine!" I sniveled. I guess he took that as encouragement. He stood up and leaned over me so that he could rub my shoulders with both hands. I was on my back and could barely see his outline in the dark. His hands were very strong and it felt heavenly to have his fingers sink deep into the tissue on my back just above the shoulder blade. I moaned my appreciation.
"Jamey, this is kinda hurting my back - "
"Oh! Then stop!" I said. "Don't hurt yourself."
"No -- it's okay, but can I get up and straddle you?"
"Oh! You don't have to - "
He moved his body over mine on his hands and knees. His warmth felt so good, straddling me so close. After working for a time with me on my back, he asked if I wanted to turn over. That put my face directly into the pillow. This time he straddled my upper legs.
I was glad to turn over because I was afraid that my rock hard woody would be discovered. But as he worked my shoulders and back from the other side, each time he bore down, I could feel his wood pressing against my crack. I had to excuse myself as I readjusted myself on the bed.
After what seemed forever, he bent over double on top of me, making contact from my butt to my shoulders. He put his face next to mine. He started saying something. I cut him off.
"Ohhhh!" I groaned. "THAT feels soooooo good!"
He wrapped his arms around my chest and hugged my from behind, and lay very still on top of me. But I smelled Will, and started to sniff again.
"I'm so sorry!" he said. "I must be getting pretty heavy on you! He slid over to the side and left his arm over my back. I turned on my side, and it felt wonderful to spoon back into him.
"Aren't you kind of uncomfortable -- me being gay and all?" I teased, thinking about what he said to me earlier that same day.
"No, it really doesn't. It feels a natural as anything!" We both fell asleep in this "natural" position.
Notes: Comments are always welcome! To Steve at stevethomas535@hotmail.com.
Thanks and love, Steve