Gregory A. Patrick Jaiden – Chapter 49 08-02-2020
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G. A. Patrick
"Ginny, would you please come in the den and sit down so Peyton and I can speak to you for a moment?" "I'll be right there, Jaiden."
Ginny came into the den and had a seat on the couch. "Ginny, we don't quite know how to tell you this, but we are going to have to hire someone else to come in and take over some of the household duties."
"Why, Jaiden, is something wrong?" "No, Ginny, nothing is wrong, we just don't think you will be able to clean the house and handle four babies by yourself." Ginny's jaw hit the floor and she sat on the couch with her mouth wide open. "Jaiden, say that again for me so I can make sure I heard you correctly."
"Ginny we are going to have to hire somebody else to come in and take over some of the household duties. Peyton, Charley, Dale, and I don't think you will be able to clean the house and handle four babies by yourself."
"Jaiden, that's what I thought I heard. And just whose babies will they be?" "Ginny, you know their parents extremely well. Their names are Jaiden, Peyton, Charley, and Dale." Ginny let out a blood-curdling scream of excitement.
"Son, when did this happen?" "Ginny, it hasn't happened yet.
"Ginny, Peyton's sister, Jenny, is going to be a surrogate mom for my child and Jenny's sister-in-law, Jennifer, is going to be a surrogate mom for the child Peyton will father. Two of Jenny's friends in her and Rob's synagogue are going to be surrogates for Dale and Charley. We found out this information last week while we were in Alabama.
"Jenny and Jennifer and their two friends will be here from the end of Spring until they become pregnant. We four boys are going to be having some fun!" "Jaiden, watch your mouth before I wash it out with soap!" We all died laughing when Ginny said that.
"Dr. Schrader at the temple is a fertility specialist and he does In-vitro fertilization and implants. He is going to be handling the medical side of the procedures until the ladies are pregnant and then he will monitor their pregnancies with their doctors."
"What we would like to do is have you choose a friend from your church whom you trust the most to help you with the house and the children when the time comes. We will compensate each of you very well for helping with our children when they get here." "Jaiden, I am so thrilled I don't know what to say." "Ginny, we hope you'll say you want to do it and that you will find a friend you trust to help you."
"Jaiden, you know I am going to do that. I already told you I would." "Yes, Ginny, you did, but that was with two children at the most, not four.' "Honey, that doesn't matter at all to me. Your children will be my grandchildren just as much as they will be your mother's. You know that!" "Thank you, Ginny, that is how we all were hoping you would feel."
"Well, Jaiden, that is how I feel and you four better not forget it." "We won't Ginny, we promise. And thank you so much for saying yes." "What else did you expect me to say?" Jaiden and Peyton hugged Ginny and they had a good cry together. When Charley and Dale got home, Ginny had a good cry with them as well.
Ginny has been smiling and singing all day. I don't remember seeing her this happy, ever!
We got a letter from Dr. Schrader's office giving the four of us an appointment for June 5th, the day after the Spring semester ends.
Peyton and I may have trouble with the instructions because we are not supposed to have sex of any kind, masturbate, or do anything that will cause us to ejaculate. We also received several prescriptions for medications we are supposed to take starting May first through June 5th. The letter is so explicit we are scared to shake out willies after we pee.
Peyton called his parents and got them on the phone together: "Mom, Dad, I need you to promise me something and you can't break the promise before June 5th, and, if Dr. Schrader instructs us to extend his orders any time after that until he gives us the go-ahead, we are really in trouble.
"What is it you need, Peyton?" "Mom, I need you and Dad to promise me you won't ask me to kiss Jaiden for at least two months. If you do, the extracurricular activities that will result will blow the doctor's orders so far out of the water that Jaiden and I won't be able to find them!"
Mom and Dad started laughing so hard they could barely catch their breath. "Mom, I am not kidding. The medical instructions are so strict for all four of us we are scared to shake the excess out of our willies after we pee. I'm so hard up I can't even look at Jaiden naked, nor can he look at me naked. Mom, we are really `hard up.' Dad, you know what it's like, we haven't been married long enough to do without sex that long!"
Dad is laughing so hard he is having trouble getting his breath into the next laugh. Ashley asked what was so funny, so Mom let her pick up an extension and put it on mute so we couldn't hear her.
Jaiden was listening in on the conversation and is behind me about to die laughing at Mom and Dad's reaction to what I said. Ginny is sitting on the couch laughing into a pillow she is laughing so hard. "Mom, what am I going to do? If you forget to not ask me to kiss Jaiden, it is all over. If we see each other naked, it is over. I am scared that if Dale and Charley walk into the hall naked to get some fresh linens, it is over for all of us."
"We've barely been married two years and we're told to do without any kind of sex for a month. We are so in trouble and we are having trouble walking already!"
Dad yelled "blue balls" and started laughing even harder. We found out later that Ashley was laughing so hard she wet herself and fell out of her chair trying to get to the bathroom.
Ashley got back on the extension fairly quickly because we could hear her through Mom's handset, so I started up again by saying, "Mom, you have to tell us what to do about this. What are we supposed to do about shaking our willies after we pee? How are we supposed to get to class on time when it hurts so badly, we can barely walk?"
Mom said, "Peyton, nothing is going to help you except some ketamine to kill the pain so you can walk, but your Dad can only give that to Peyton-the-Jackass. So, I guess all your showers are going to have to be cold water. You're going to have to get a small freezer that will go into each bathroom of your bedrooms so you can keep your towels in the freezer and hope using freezing bath towels will help."
"And when you guys go to bed, you are going to have to wear the ugliest jeans and shirts you can find. You hate the color purple, so I guess Jaiden is going to have to sleep in purple or you are both going to have to wear eye masks when you go to bed. You could paint your fingernails and toenails bright purple, that may help stave off sexual urges."
"I assume you each can feel your way to the bathroom at night in the dark. But then again, what are you going to do to replace shaking your willies after you pee? Oh, wait a minute, you can't feel your way into the bathroom in the dark, it might make the blue balls worse, or worse yet it might cause a wet dream. Have you thought about having thoughts of Jaiden naked and ready to have sex making you have a wet dream? You are going to have to watch that!"
Ashley couldn't contain herself anymore, we heard her lose it laughing in the background. The question now is how can we play this up a bit more?
"Mom, a friend here at the house just handed me a note and pulled up a site on the computer called Adam & Eve. They have chastity harnesses for men. Jaiden can put one on and I can lock it and I can put one on and he can lock it. That way we can't touch ourselves, we can't shake our willies after we pee and there is no way we can have sex with them on."
"And forget about wet dreams because every time we turn over the chastity cage will be sticking us in our willies and interrupting any thoughts we may be having about sex or masturbation. I guess we'll get wheelchairs to get to and from class, but I don't know how we will get them into the house without trying to walk. Mom, just please don't ask me to kiss Jaiden for you. That will truly put me in dire straits."
"Mom, have I got Ashley laughing enough that I can quit this banter?"
"Peyton, how did you know she was listening in?" "Mom, she was and is laughing so hard we can hear her through your telephone handset. Seriously Mom, we really can't do anything that will risk lowering our sperm count."
"Peyton, thank you for the laugh today, I really needed it. Take care, dear, I'll see and talk to you the next time you come home." We love you too, Ashley, have a good weekend."
"Peyton, you are so bad." "Yea, I am, Mom, and I learned it all from Dad, so you can give him hell tonight!" "Son, you just don't know what I am going to do to your Dad tonight. You know how miserable I can make him!" "Just don't badger him all night Mom, he doesn't deserve that much grief."
"If you talk to Jenny, tell her we are getting twin beds for the two downstairs bedrooms so they will be able to rest more comfortably. They should be delivered on Saturday."
"Perhaps it would be good for Jaiden, Charley, Dale, and I to sleep in them until the IVF takes successfully. That way we wouldn't be tempted or purposefully forgetful at night." "You know, Peyton, that might not be such a bad idea. When everything has been successful and you start sleeping together again, it will be extremely exciting for you."
"Son, I love you, but I have to get back to work, so I will talk to you later." "OK, Mom, I love you too, bye." "Oh, Peyton, I forgot something, be sure and give Jaiden a kiss for me." Then all I heard was, "click." Jaiden was literally rolling on the floor laughing, and Ginny has been laughing so hard she looks like she has been crying. That was fun!
"We better get our assigned reading done so the professor can't spring a pop-test on us and catch us off guard. And after that, it will be quick kisses, hugs, and long, arduous walks together."
Ginny spoke to us and said, "you boys are so bad, but I love you anyway."
When Charley and Dale got home, we told them what we had done and they laughed so hard they lost their breath.
We got to class this morning to find out Mom and Dad got us back good!
The professor walked in with a sheepish grin on his face. After his assistant did roll call, the Professor said, "I understand we have two individuals in dire straits who are having to wear male chastity belts to avoid sex and shaking their willies after they go to the bathroom and pee, or having wet dreams since they are under doctor's orders not to have sex or wet dreams for a month. I wonder who that could be? I wonder, but I can tell whoever it is that it's not nice to fool with mother nature or momma's who will get you back. Their payback can be hell." The class died laughing and they knew exactly who it was because Jaiden and I had the only faces that turned dark shades of crimson when the professor had his say.
We caught mortal grief at the end of class as half the guys who were leaving class yelled out, "Hey Jaiden and Peyton, be careful when you go to the bathroom, shaking those willies can make them explode!" The professor was laughing so hard he had to sit down.
Peyton and I were the first students to walk into the classroom Friday morning. The professor was already in the classroom and when we walked in, he said, "Jaiden and Peyton, thank you for the laughs we had yesterday. Several of your fellow students have been having a really hard time with school and work and you two took some pressure off them with a bit of levity. Thank you for taking the banter so nicely yesterday."
"You're welcome, Doc. If we can help those students with their stress, Peyton, Dale, and I are pretty good at dealing with those types of problems, especially Dale. You are welcome to give our phone numbers to those students, we'll be more than glad to befriend them and do for them what we did with Dale and Charley at Wellstone." "Thank you, gentlemen, that is most gracious of you and I really appreciate your offer. I'll talk with them and see what they think."
When class was over, Peyton and I were the first ones out the door and we stood nearby to see if we could hear the names of the students who were having stress problems. We heard the professor say, "Mark, Jimmy, and Al, may I see you three for a minute before you go. I remember we all sat down together and you each were having stress problems with work and school. Here are Jaiden's and Peyton's phone numbers. You may wish to call them or stop them after their classes and talk to them about helping you with your stress. They started a stress release program at Wellstone that was and continues to be very successful. You may find them very helpful according to the counseling center at Wellstone University."
When they came out of class, we were in the hallway and Mark asked if it was ok if he called us tonight to talk about some problems he was having that we had helped others with. We told him it was perfectly OK, that we would take the time to speak with him. After he walked off, we stuck our heads in the classroom door and let the professor know Mark had made contact with us about his stress problem and we would be talking with him tonight. He smiled and said thanks so much, gentlemen, I appreciate that.
Mark called after dinner and we talked about everything he was going through, and it was a lot. We could see why he was so stressed. I asked him what kind of exercise he did, and he said he didn't exercise because stress took every bit of the energy he had. I told him that had to change PDQ.
Peyton asked him if he had been to the counseling center at LECOM. He said no, that he hadn't thought about it. Peyton told him he had to go to counseling to deal with personal issues that were contributing to his stress and that he would set it up and monitor it for Mark, who agreed to the process.
The next thing I discussed with him was the exercise program. "Mark, we run five miles per day in the early evenings. We can do that in the middle of the day after classes, but it is much cooler in the early evening, but we will do one or the other."
"I'll start you off on a mile and every two weeks we will increase that by a quarter-mile. There is no hurry in getting the mile run, but the faster you can do it the better. If you can do the run in the early evenings, you can come to our house and we can run in the neighborhood or we can meet at our synagogue and run from there. If the group grows, and hopefully it will, we can use the parking lot at the synagogue unless the Rabbi or Hadassah has an event going on."
"Mark, are you married?" "Yes, Jaiden, I am." "Let's see, how do I say this: My Mom, who is an emergency physician, said sex is a very good stress reducer. She told me that as we were walking back to her house after a long evening walk in the mountains where she lives. I was embarrassed and she almost fell over she was laughing so hard. But she was right. Two to three times a week at least if you can and your wife isn't too tired in the evenings or the mornings on weekends."
If not sex, make sure you spend two or three days a week having quality time together. Massages are good without sex. The counselor will talk to you about that. I would suggest you forego sex for a month and give her sensual massages four times a week until she asks you to make love to her. If it is her idea, you both will enjoy the intimacy in unbelievable ways. Ask her what she wants and let her lead you. Don't be afraid to try something new if she suggests something new."
"Do you have any privacy on a patio outside your apartment? A chair sort of like a long lounge chair?" "Yes, Jaiden, we do." "Good!
"After you give her a massage, put a light robe on her and take her out on the patio without any lights on. Sit on the chair and pull her onto your lap and lay her head on the left side of your chest at the shoulder. Tenderly run your fingers through her hair. Gently rub her face. Don't touch her sexually and don't talk to her, just hold her and love her."
"Give her a light kiss on the top of her head. If you fall asleep and sleep there all night with you holding each other, don't worry about it unless the weather gets bad or is too cold. Let her feel your love through tenderness. It will be magical for you."
"If the program grows like I hope it will, parking on the street at the house may not be feasible when we run. It is an upscale neighborhood and some of the neighbors might have a problem with cars on the street. But, for now, I would like to start at our home at, say, seven in the evening. When time falls back, we start the runs at 4 so it doesn't get dark on us. If another time is better for you, let me know, we can accommodate schedule changes."
"The address is 5860 Landings Way." "No way!" "Mark, what do you mean?" "I live at 6500 Landings Way. Laurie and I have an apartment in the basement of her parent's house." "Then we don't have a problem. Maybe we can get together sometime for dinner. Dale does our cooking and there isn't a restaurant in town that can beat his cooking, I promise you that." "Jaiden, thanks for that offer, Laurie and I don't get to get out much and she spends most of her afternoons cooking. She would enjoy a night out."
"OK, Saturday at 6 pm. I'll let Dale know so he can plan a menu and I can get the food. Hope he says prime rib, his prime rib is second to none. He usually has grilled asparagus and garlicky creamed potatoes with it. Ask Laurie and call and let me know tonight."
"Just to make sure, Laurie won't have a problem with us being married gay couples. Will she?" "Not at all Jaiden, her brother and his husband, nah, she won't have a problem. What is their last name?" "Belson-Kravitz." "David and his husband." "Jaiden, how did you know that?"
"Have some fun with this, call him tonight and tell him and his husband to join you and Laurie for a dinner invitation Saturday night."
"Call David before you call to let me know if Laurie is up to a night out with us. Before you tell him the address, ask him what is up with getting caught naked on Little Beach." "No, you and Peyton aren't..." "Yes, we are!" "Damn, that was so funny when we heard about it." "David's brother is our neighbor and David's husband is the brother of our associate Rabbi."
"Amazing, we are also Jewish, but Laurie stopped going to temple because there weren't many people our age." "Well, there are four your age now, so we will pick you up Saturday morning at 8:30 and you two can go to the temple with Peyton and me."
"Saturday week, our brothers go through their conversion ceremony and all our families will be here. We would love to have you join us for lunch at the country club afterward."
"I would love to join you, Jaiden, but I can't afford their prices." "Don't worry about that, Peyton's Dad and my Mom will probably pay for everybody, they always do. Once you meet them, you will fall in love with them. Don't worry about the cost, it will be covered for you. Laurie will love that treat."
Jaiden's phone rang at about 8 pm. "Jaiden, this is Mark, I called Laurie's brother and asked him what was up with getting caught on a nude beach in Maui. He asked how the hell I found out about that, and I told him it was a secret, but he needed to fess up. He told me the story and I and Laurie have never laughed so hard. When he finished the story, I told him he was invited to a dinner party Laurie and I were invited to Saturday night at 6. When I gave him the address, he said, "Damn you, you met Jaiden or Peyton." I told him I know both of you well. He started laughing. He said to tell you they'll be there and thank you."
"What about Laurie?" "Jaiden, I told her about your invitation and she started crying. She needs that night out badly, so we will be there as well. And she said to thank you for Saturday morning, she will make sure we are ready." "Great! After I told you there were four people your age who now attend the synagogue, there are 6 counting David and his husband, and the Rabbis and their wives are only a few years older."
"Jaiden, thanks for everything, you have no idea how much I appreciate you!" "Thank you, Mark, we'll see you in class tomorrow."
When Peyton and I walked into the classroom, the professor was already there and asked if Mark had called us last night and we told him, "yes, Mark did call. Professor, when Mark gets here, after your assistant does the roll call, ask Mark if he made a certain call last night?" When Mark says he did, ask him about the nude beach in Maui."
"Jaiden, is the story clean enough for everybody in the class to hear?" "Yes, sir, and it is hilarious at that." Something tells me you and Peyton are right in the middle of that story. "Yep, Professor, we surely are!" "Damn, I have got to hear this story!"
Everybody had arrived for class and the professorial assistant took the roll. When he got through, the Professor spoke up and said, "Mark, did you make a certain phone call last night?" "Yes, sir, I did and the results of that call are nothing short of amazing, thank you for helping with that." "You are welcome, Mark, I am proud of you for doing what you did."
"Ah, Mark, one more thing, what's the story about Little Beach in Maui?" Mark started laughing so hard he couldn't get his breath.
"Professor the Rabbi's brother and his husband, my brother-in-law, had met some guys at the Jewish Center in Maui one Friday night. Later on, David and my brother-in-law, were strolling down Little Beach as naked as jaybirds and saw the guys they had met at the Center lying naked on the beach erasing tan lines, at least that was their story."
"One of the guys told David that his brother and his husband's brother happened to be on Maui as well. David took his phone out and called his brother and discovered he was just down the street. His brother said he would be at the beach in about 20 minutes and that should give them time to get dressed and get their butts off the nude beach."
"David asked his brother how he knew they were nude and on the nude beach. Rabbi told his brother, "I am a very wise Rabbi, and I know my little brother well. I also happen to be on top of the hill looking down on all 6 of you."
"David started laughing and one of the guys asked why he was laughing so hard and David told him to look on top of the hill behind them. The guy looked up the hill and saw the Rabbis about to double over in laughter as they were waiving at the guys who panicked and stumbled around trying to get dressed.
"Mark, please tell me Peyton and Jaiden weren't in that group of guys." "Professor, why would you ask me to lie to you?" The class lost it at that point as did the professor who said, "Damn, somehow, I knew they were in that mix."
"Peyton, Jaiden, I can't wait to hear what is coming next. I have never had two students who were more interesting than you two or who made the class laugh more than you two have." "Professor, we can't deny the story and wouldn't if we could. We were on our honeymoon and it was hard...for us, I'm sorry that pun was not intended, it was hard for us to keep our clothes on."
"Damn, that is funny! I did ask you two to help with stress some in the class were having and you have done an awesome job, thank you!" "Sir, you are welcome. Peyton and I are more than glad to help with that. Doing that is in our history and we enjoy helping others and we truly enjoy our brother Dale helping in that regard as well. If we can use humor that involves us, we aren't embarrassed to do that. If we can help one person per day to laugh, we consider ourselves to be successful."
"Maybe one day Peyton and I will tell you about being as naked as a newborn baby and getting locked out on the balcony of our room at the resort where we stayed."
The professor put his elbows on the lab table, put his head in his hands, shook his head, and said, "Lord, what is next, please tell me."
Peyton spoke up at that point and said, "Professor, Jaiden and I are preparing for the IVF procedures that start June 5 and the doctor has ordered us to be on a no-sperm-loss campaign, so please don't ask me to kiss him for any reason. It will lead to extracurricular activities neither of us can control." The professor replied, "I sure as hell stepped into that one. Never mind, Lord, I don't think I want to know what I asked for." Everybody was laughing and clapping their hands now. The professor was standing in the front shaking his head.
"Hello, Phyllis, this is Andy again, that damned son of yours has done it again and involved Jaiden this time. Is Jim around?" "Yes, and he is free, so let me get him on the phone." "Phyllis stay on the line with him." "OK, I will."
"Hey, Andy, what's the Jackass done this time?"
"Jim, you and Phyllis have done such an awesome job raising that boy. He told me to ask another student about Little Beach in Maui this morning. I had asked him and Jaiden to help this student with some severe stress he was having, and they are doing an awesome job."
"They have even gotten a counseling program started here and LECOM is having to hire more counselors, and we are starting to see grades rise."
"The President of LECOM asked me to inform you that he has no regrets whatsoever in getting those boys full-ride scholarships. They are so awesome, and I am so proud to know them and have them in my class. It is interesting to me that they have no idea you and I are old friends from Orange Beach, and if they do, they have shown no indication of that. All they do is work their butts off."
"You asked what he has done this time: After he and Jaiden had the class howling with laughter, I could see stress floating out the door. They are hosting the student I mentioned earlier and his wife for dinner this weekend. When the student told his wife about the invite, she started crying at the idea of having some time off. They also discovered they are neighbors a block apart and members of the same temple. Peyton and Jaiden are picking them up this Saturday and taking them to services at the temple. They are just so damned amazing!"
"Also, Peyton spoke up and said, "Professor, the IVF procedure starts June 5th and the doctor has ordered Jaiden and me to be on a no-sperm-loss program for a month, so please don't ask me to kiss Peyton for anybody. If you do it will lead to extracurricular activities that Jaiden and I can't control." That got the class to laughing hysterically for the third time."
"By the time we could have any class time, we had 45 minutes left out of 2 hours. When the students left the class, they were in the best mood I have seen them in since school began last August. If your boys keep showing the aptitude and knowledge of medicine they have shown so far, we are predicting they will start their internships and residencies a year earlier than expected. Just thought you'd like to know that. Oh, the humor about the no-sperm-loss orders, somehow I think that story may have started with Phyllis." As Phyllis started laughing hysterically, she said, "Andy, it did start with me, and we are still laughing about how Peyton said the same thing to me." "I thought so!"
"I just wanted to say thanks again for your wonderful sons being here at LECOM and to let you know how awesome they are at helping their fellow students on getting rid of excess stress. They are unbelievable young men." "Thank you, Andy, we appreciate your comments more than you will ever know!"
"Jim, Phyllis, y'all take care, I'll call you again and let you know when those young men pull off something else that is unbelievable." "Have a good day, Andy, thank you for calling."
"Phyllis, wait till we get up there and I get my hands on those boys. They have earned everything that has been invested in them and then some. I can't wait to see how their children turn out." "Me either, Jim, me either!" As Jim walked back toward his office, his pride for our boys was shown by the tears coming from his eyes. My eyes aren't any drier than Jim's.
Jenny will get another email tonight telling her that her brother and Jaiden have done it again."