Introduction
Hey guys! I am totally sorry that I haven't this chapter as soon as I could. Life has been a bit of a rough and tumble as of last and work keeps me busy now. But It doesn't mean I wont stop writing.
If you like or dislike the story- send me an email! It's what keeps this story alive.
So here we are now- we've hit the half way mark- I only intended for there to be 20 chapters. I hope you guys aren't too disappointed.
About myself: I have lived in London for a long time now and it's a vibrant and colorful place full of character. Soho (No idea why its called Soho, Probably because its short for South Holborn) is the one street that's packed with gay guys. But I rarely go there.. To flamboyant for my taste
All mistakes are mine- this story hasn't been edited yet
Enjoy the next chapter!
NOTES and DISCLAIMERS:
DISCLAIMER: This narrative has scenes of male nudity and sexual acts between two men that readers may find disturbing or inappropriate for ages under 18. Please do not read if you comply with both of those categories.
This is copyrighted to the Nifty Alliance Archive and is exclusively for the readers of this website. Do not attempt to copy oNormal">
The characters are all fictional with vague and few references to real people. If they come across coincidentally as someone in reality please take it as a compliment. Events are also referenced from certain real life scenarios and are fictional. If you have experienced them feel free to contact me about it.
NOTES: This is a fantasy- Reality is different, use a condom.
Chapter XI- Low with Sorrow.
Rob had woken up early this morning. Nightmares about losing George had made him a very light sleeper and easy to wake up. His own breathing would scare him because he couldn't hear it. The silence would envelope him and he would freak because there was no contact.
He had never felt like this before. So broken. So fragile. He had heard what George attempted to do with his life and from then on he knew that it was a complete and total mistake to have even tried to woo George to love him.
Why did he fall for the straight or taken ones?
The next couple of days I didn't see Jack. He had taken more time to catch up with his classes and then straight to the gymnasium for more practice with his floor routines and other choreography for the state championship in Spartanburg next week.
I had decided that I was going to go whether he liked it or not. I also asked if Lance wanted to come- because ever since the party- things had taken a turn for the better with him and Jeff. It was rather sweet actually- the cute blond guy with his red head boyfriend.
They were starting to grow on me.
But then there was Rob. On Tuesday after talking to Jack (Whom was half asleep and probably speaking in the most bluntest form I could think off- Short words) I made it my prerogative to make sure that Rob was ok and that I would help him no matter what.
I owed it to him- for freeing me from my cell I guess. When he first made out with me in the Garden shack, I had actually been a bit of a different person. I was still vulnerable though.
I felt fear- fear of going into the showers alone without Jack, Fear of going into places alone unless I saw a friendly place.
But encountering Rob did more than shatter the hex that was on me and causing me to fear the world. I became a little braver than anything.
I walked up the stairs to the third floor of the en suite dorms, which were a step up from mine- seeing that Rob could afford it and I was on the other hand more modest, and straight away I was pushed.
I fell on the next set of stairs up and braced the floor with my elbows. Who the fuck was that!? I thought angrily. I was seething and a little pissed and as I got up I only managed to catch a glimpse of a buzz cut skin head that ran past in a spandex shorts and a gray hoodie.
Fucking jerk. I dusted myself off and checked the scrape I was beginning to feel rub on my knees. I rolled up my jeans. Yep..Carpet burn..This is going to itch.
I had to think back a second. Wow..I actually got angry and didn't regret it. I guess I am making headway with myself. I wonder if it was Jack that was rubbing off on me.
I reached Rob's and as I was about to knock, Rob opens the door.
I'm a little shocked at first and I smiled at him.
"Hi Rob"
"Hey..." he sounded so down trodden. This had really got to him... Fuck..
"Are you ok? I thought I would come by and see how you were...y-y-y-ou skipped class yesterday so I came to see whats got you.."
Well..ok I wasn't so tactful because he knew I knew very well what was going on in his mind. I looked at him again. He was in shambles. He was wearing a white t-shirt two sizes bigger than his that it actually looked like belonged to someone massive (maybe George?) and just a pair of bikini briefs.
But what really got me was his disheveled looks. The shadows under his eyes, the drool on his cheek or the tear drops...either one, and his unruly hair which was normally just tamed and gelled.
I sighed and I looked at him with such sympathy. His eyes welled up and I began to feel mine water.
The next thing I knew, my shoulder was soaked in his tears and his neck was wet with salty sorrow.
"I'm so sorry this had to happen to you!" I said reassuringly. God I felt awful for him. It brought back so much sadness from my past that I too was weeping deep in my heart. It was such a tragedy that Rob had to fall for George.
"It's ok..." he sniffed and then let me into his room. I closed the door along the way and dropped my backpack on the side of his desk and came to sit down on his bed. His room was considerably bigger, and with a large open window so I could see the terrace way to the garden.
I guess there were perverts perving on me as I worked after all.
We talked a little more then though. It was good that the ice that had been around Rob was thawing. I could feel him suddenly warm up to me and tell me what was going on his head.
He was a mess though. Constant thoughts of pain and hurt filled him all the time. It didn't help that he was so close to the gardens and he would always see George. But now that George was in hospital and should be out of recovery soon, the bittersweet hollowness of the emptiness that George left and the sweet feeling of love that filled George conflicted in Rob.
He needed some respite and I understood him all too well. In fact, it brought up some long lost feelings that I thought I would never have to feel again. I sighed.
"Everything will be alright...just hand around us and you'll be ok..."
Rob just smiled as he wiped his tears on his wrist.
"Thanks Dan....I owe you one..."
"I guess lets just say we'll call it even"
"Ok dude" he smiled, happy that there was a friend he could turn to.
Keys began to fumble into the lock and I realized that we weren't alone then. "Who's your room mate?" I asked Rob who was happy that I had changed the subject. "Oh some Sophomore finishing up for his finals in epidemiology" but it didn't prepare me for the shock I was in for as the tall brown-haired football player with the cute dimples but a sad smile walked in.
"Shane!"
------------------------------Flashback----------------------------------------
Marcus' pulse was faint. I could hear the beeping that had slowed to a 3-4 andante. He was fading, I knew it and I wasn't ready. Not ready for him to leave. Not ready to live the life I wanted alone. I needed Marcus
"Marcus! Don't leave us! Don't leave me! PLEASE!" I cried out as tears fell freely from my face. Please! Don't! It echoed in my head.
I felt Shane tear up. He too was seriously hurt.
To see Marcus there- his hair all but torn from his scalp with bloody patches of exposed flesh covered by bandages. His face bruised and battered to a pulp that it looked like he had come out of a black. His eyes were barely recognizable to the Green emeralds of joy and laughter I had once remembered.
If there was a sight that could make you die inside- this was it. A man battered within an inch of his life with no hope of return on his death bed with his two doctor parents, his brother and sister holding one charred and mangled hand and his lover on the other- crying and weeping freely.
"Don't GO PLEASE!"
"Daniel...Alyssa...I love you.." I cried and felt my sister collapse. I caught her and held her and his hand tightly in my arms.
"Shane....I...love..." and that was it. The monotonous eerie echo that was his pulse.
"MARCUS!!!!" My mum cried out. There was nothing...nothing we could do...
------------------------------Flashback end-----------------------------------
"Daniel!"
We looked at each other in shock. "You're room mates with Rob?!" I exclaimed to mask my sheer shock and terror. Everything I had done to work so hard to repress flooded back, and through Shane's sad amber eyes, I felt the misery of three years ago coming back to haunt me. I suddenly went tunnel vision. My heart crashed a thousand feet below to the depths of hell. I was in sorrow completely and I began to well up so fast.
The next thing I knew- I sped up to Shane and he took me in his arms and we cried. We cried freely and hard. Rob was looking completely befuddled at how close we had become in the few short seconds that we had been in the room.
"Shane! I'm so sorry I-i-i-"
"It's ok buddy.. You're forgiven. I'm so sorry to." He was trying to hold his tears back but they kept running freely.
"I should have come to you! I should have said something! I should have tried to help you get through this! But I was a wreck myself!"
"It's ok buddy..Honestly...I'm just glad I've seen you know"
Rob, who was feeling left out yet again brought up the courage to say something. "Ugh dyou mind telling me what's going on between my friend and my room-mate?" He asked.
"Oh shit..Sorry Rob... It's been a long time"
"Cmon Dan we owe sweet Rob an Explanation" Shane said as he ushered me to a sit on his bed.
We basically explained how we knew each other through my older brother Marcus and that Shane was his lover, and then the beating – which even now was such a difficult thing to get through because up until recently I had never talked to Shane and now that I knew where he was (Ironic that he was only just a walk away)- Marcus' beating and my own brought a lot things home.
"Oh Wow...well I guess the whole homophobe attacks run in the family.." Rob said.
Shane threw a quizzical look and wondered what Rob meant by that.
Rob picked up on that. "Oh didn't you know?- Daniel was beaten only last month"
"What!?" Shane roared as he lept to his feet."Dan! I can't believe You didn't tell me!"
I was feeling a little guilty at this point but there was nothing I could have done. "Even if I were to tell you- I didn't know where you were..So How could I contact you?..."
"That's a good point" Shane said as he settled down.
We spent the good morning and early afternoon talking and catching up with each other- Rob learning more about my life and I learning more about him as we conversed. I recently found out that Shane was retaking his final year after taking a year out to grieve Marcus' loss.
He worked at the gym near where he lived in Lacey and just tried to forget about Marcus. But he couldn't. He was tormented every time he picked up a weight or when he saw another guy that looked like my dear Marcus his hopes would be raised and then dashed on the floor heartlessly.
I felt bad for him and I went through the same phase. I don't know if I could say I was truly over his death. But we both agreed (with a lot of outside perspective from Rob) that we needed to find closure. We would go see his grave.
Rob had asked the question about whether the guys that beat him were caught. It was a question that ran through our minds for the first 6 months- but we did manage to get the guys killed Marcus. They were in prison for life- four of them. Four arrogant assholes.
"Did you get the guy who beat the shit out of you then?" Shane asked
"Jack knocked him out when he came to save me so..Yeah. John is going to prison"
Shane shook his head and did a double take. "John as in John Barnes?"
"If you mean that tall hulking mass of mass and stupidity with brown hair and squinting brown eyes and a massive square head?" I asked him which he nodded to
"-then yes...We did..He's in prison for life too. My dad saw to that."
"Didn't you have to go to trial for that?" he asked.
"They had all the evidence they needed although I did have to go in for the final part of the trail to confirm the story."
Shane was still shocked. He had a look on his face that made me laugh. He didn't find it funny.
"What's wrong dude?!" Rob said
"Nothing.. I'm just glad that the prick is going down for life."
After I met with Rob in his dorms I thought it would be time to see Lance before I went to meet Jack in the cafeteria.
Now I hadn't actually been to Lance's place. He was a bit of a rich kid, so he didn't live on-site per say. He did live nearby though. Only a block across from the campus actually. There were a few new developments nearby and his parents had thought it would be convenient instead to by a condo rather than constantly booking a hotel every time the came into town for business.
Lance told me his father was an economist and his mom was the secretary that helped him organize work and contracts. They earned a lot of money as a result from helping big governments abroad. After a while though- his father became tired of the constant politics and hatred that was harbored by his clients as the fought fiercely against one another for his service- so he quit the industry and went to doing something him and his wife enjoyed- houses.
I didn't know that they really were into houses, and took a lot of time planning it. But it was evident as soon as I walked into Lance's place.
Lavishly renovated with a classic cream and mahogany look. It was very summer beach house, with linen white curtains, caramel brown furnishings and a lot of books and paintings. It was a very homely feeling. As if you were in the home of a hermit scholar.
"Hey Dan! How are you? Where's Jack?" Lance said as he opened the door. He had an infectious smile on his face and a lot of energy. It made me smile.
"I'm ok dude, Jack is training at the moment before we head off to Spartanburg in North Carolina for the Interstate championships"
"We?" He looked at us skeptically. I just chuckled. "Aww! You're going to support him!"
I went red. "Yeah I am"
"Well cmon in. I was just about to cook up something with Jeff before I went to class."
"Three right?" I asked him. It was a Tuesday and I only had late classes then. We usually went together for class. But today felt a little askew from my normal routine of waking up, pleasing Jack as he pleased me and then getting ready for class. Maybe because I took the time to stop studying and actually payed attention to my friends lives. Which wasn't normal from my routine.
"Have you seen Rob recently" Lance asked. His tone had changed to one of a more serious note.
"I saw him before I came to see you" I told him.
"How is he?" the look of concern and caring struck across his face told me that that there was something that told me they were more than just friends- they were best friends.
"He's ok. Have you seen him recently?"
"No not really. I thought...or rather Jeff thought it would be a good idea to give Rob some space"
"He misses us he said, and that he just needed someone to talk to that's all. He still feels bad that he ruined George's marriage."
Lance was silent and I didn't know what to say at first.
I took a seat on his sofa and dropped my backpack on the floor.
"Did you say that Jeff was here?" trying to fill in time and my curiosity.
"Yeah" Lance said sheepishly before he headed into the kitchen down the hall.
"Dude I'll be right back. I just need to get something and then we can talk."
he said before disappearing.
So something was going on between Jeff and Lance. Now I didn't think that there was anything at first. I thought if anything by the way they had all first met- sandwiching Rob that Lance or Jeff would try something with Rob.
Then again- Maybe Rob was just after me all along.
Gosh! What is going on with me!? This is really surreal. I feel like I'm a member of the Melrose Place Cast- Gossip this, speculate that, sex this, fuck that.
I sighed and then had the life frightened out of me as I felt a hand on my shoulder, I was about to curl up into a ball and cower for dear life. But I was in Lance's house? Why would someone try to hurt me in his house?
Oh damn these natural instincts.
"Hey Buddy!" Jeff said.
"Fuck! Jeff! Don't fucking do that!..Y-y-y-y-ou know how bad I am with sneaking"
I stammered out.
Jeff clearly saw my distress and apologized profusely.
He sat next to me and then gave me a hug.
"How are you Dan?"
"I'm ok...now that I've recovered from the shock...How are you?"
"I've been better, But being a sophomore is taking its toll. And thats just without being the RA. I would have thought that this year's bunch would be "baggage-free" but fucking hell- you all have baggage, and it follows you like a plague of locusts! Why dyou guys always cause a shitstorm?"
I chuckled hard at his rant- "Because we know you love the drama really."
"That......is true" he said, although the conflict was in him for a second about whether he didn't like the drama- deep down, that's kind of why Jeff wanted to be the RA.
"So....How are you and Jack?" his tone had changed, adopting a slightly serious one.
"He's tired thats what he is. He works his ass off at training and then works his ass off some more before coming back to dorms and just snuggle up with me."
Jeff's jaw dropped and then a flash of envy and jealously...or at least thats what I thought it was, because his brow was furrowed. What he said confirmed it though.
"Damnit! You two really are right for each other. When we used to ..well when I was with him- it was sex and parties. But he has genuinely relaxed around you."
I was confused. "What did you mean- relaxed?"
"Oh...Jack is a bit of a machine. 'We have to do this- we have to do that- cmon it'll be fun- we don't live too long' ...I think that was his mantra when we went school together. Now though.. Even I notice it- He's so much more...calmer. As if he's on meth almost"
I laughed out loud and Jeff joined it. I couldn't imagine Jack drugged up.
"Although- I wouldn't put it past him" Jeff added.
"What dyou mean?" I asked curiously.
"Well. We didn't do drugs or anything and I doubt he has- but he wouldn't back down from trying."
I shook my head defiantly and countered "Not if he's with me...I can't tolerate that. I've had enough of drug addicts ruining my best friends life and mine. If he did that...." I stopped right there.
I didn't want to think of the prospect should those two collide. Jack and Drugs. I wouldn't be able too.
"What about drinking?" I asked trying to dig up more about Jack's past since he wouldn't tell me.
"Drink? Well.. He does, and I think he's averted to it unless he's around people"
"What makes you think that?" I asked him.
"He doesn't drink alone, and he always has a cup at a party but never outside one."
I was suddenly getting wrapped up into this. Learning more about Jack from Jeff's eyes. It might be filtered but how else was I going to learn more about him if he wasn't around to tell me?
So it turns out he doesn't drink much anyway. Jeff was his only partner, and that whenever Jack is around Jeff, its all about "Ohh Daniel this and Gosh Daniel that and how he takes every breath from him with his smile"
I was blushing hard and crimson now. He talked about me to Jeff. "Oh but he never mentions it to the team. Just to me. The rest of the gymnasts know Jack is dating and two guys I know in the team- Shane and Andre are a little pissed and envious that he's gushing about this mystery guy and not them"
"Wait! Shane Fielding?" I was incredulous, Shane was on the Gymnastics team!?
"yeah! How dyou know!?"
I sighed heavily. And I began to repeat my heavy history with Shane.
After the end of the story, I was in tears again and by this time Lance had joined us quietly and gave me a hug with Jeff.
"Oh dude! I'm so sorry... For both of you. That's so unfair and awful."
"...Thats ok, We're going to see Marcus' grave one weekend. Probably after Spartanburg." I said.
We went silent for a little bit, not because it was awkward and but because there was something that was going on between Jeff and Lance as they silently conferred with one another.
"What are you up to guys?" I felt a little paranoid in case they were talking about me and plotting to push me down the stairs.
Oh shit! It's back again. The wave of fear and anxiety in the pit of my stomach.
Lance smiled and I suddenly felt a little comforted.
"Ugh...Well I guess you know and so does Jack.. But We've been seeing each other more recently" Jeff said.
"No kidding... I sometimes wonder if you skip classes just to have sex with each other"
Lance chuckled "Well that too.. But.. More than anything, we've decided that as soon as the year ends, that Jeff is going to give up being RA and move in with me"
"WOW! That's fucking awesome!"
We left Jeff in Lance's house while we went to class. We were five minutes late but Prof Silvoni was in some weird cheery mood that made me a little suspicious.
I saw Rob and sat next to him and have him a little squeeze on the hand before the lesson started.
When it finished the Prof called me back and I suddenly felt a little afraid. The guys said they would wait for me in the hall while the Prof talked to me.
"Ugh Sir.. What's up?"
The Prof smiled at me. "Well.. I know that you don't like being pushed into the limelight but, recently you've really come out of your shell. And I am really enjoying the new you"
I blushed hard. "Ugh Thanks sir..."
"But that's not why I asked you come and talk to me. See I was wondering if I could get a favor from you.."
"Sure sir... What is it you want from me?"
"Well, you've got an incredible knack for just being right on the money with majority of the questions, and you seem to shine out far more than the other students, and I think the crowd you hand around, Robert North and Lance Weis also among the other two that I want to ask this- Would like to come to MIT to a physics seminar?"
I was a little taken back. Me? Be at a physics seminar?
"But what will I do there sir? I'm not that talented"
"Well. I read your further theory on Schroedinger- and you presented it very well to us in the last lecture, and I do need a research assistant or rather a team. Would you like to come?"
I literally jumped at the chance- I had never been offered something like this- I always worked hard to earn it, I had to beg and ask for certain placed.
"Yes! Totally! Wow! MIT! This is amazing!"
"Can you also pass on the message to Robert and Lance. I want them there too."
"Oh thank you sir!" And nearly ran out to tell the guys.
I had to admit I was a huge nerd about this but going to Michigan- I had never been as far as to each Vancouver north and south and to be heading off to the other side of the country would be amazing!
But something hit me- when was it? Because Spartanburg was also my first time too- and I wanted to share that moment of being at the Championship with Jack, What if the collided? Oh god please don't..
"Is there something wrong Daniel?" the Prof asked.
"yeah.....When is it?"
"Next week, we leave on Monday and the expenses are covered by the College Alumni trustees"
I suddenly fell a thousand feet into the ground.
I was crushed. I didn't know how I was going to do this. What should I choose? I knew I wanted to be there for the MIT Seminar, but then I also wanted to be there for Jack at the Championships.
"I see that this is a problem already- Well listen, pass the message on to the two, and the Talk to your boyfriend about this."
I was a little taken back.
"Excuse me sir?" I asked, shocked that he knew
"Oh come on Daniel- I knew you were gay, and what's more- So am I. If you hadn't gotten out of your shell a month after being beaten, I would have definitely come to your rescue. Take care Daniel"
I was stoked and I nearly choked on the information.
WHAT!? Was the Prof telling me he has a crush on me?!
Hope you enjoyed this chapter, I know that this didn't have sex in it, but Hey! It's not always about it. This is a love story :P
If you have any comments please! Send them to me! It's always good to hear from you guys! Literally.naked@gmail.com