Disclaimer: This story is a work of pure fiction and is not intended to imply that Hayden Christensen is gay.

If it is illegal for you to be reading this story in your city, state or country, or you are offended by homosexual activity, then leave now.

This story time frame starts about March/April 2002, the time when Hayden was in the west-end starring in "This is Our Youth". Remember, this is fiction, nothing more.

Though I've had this chapter written for some time now, I wasn't sure if I wanted to continue with it. I changed my mind. An artist has a right to do so, right? Anyway, enjoy and as always, constructive feedback is much appreciated.

IS THIS OUR YOUTH

Chapter 6

Waking up in someone's arms was new, different, and strange. Joe felt like he was in a romance film. It all seemed so constructed. The unusual sun-light was streaming in from the window and partially drawn curtains, and falling on their half naked bodies. Hayden was cuddling him from behind, his nose nuzzled in Joe's shoulder. Not that Joe was complaining. It gave him an internal light that he hadn't felt in years.

"Are you awake yet?" asked Hayden huskily, his eyes still closed.

Joe shifted his body so that he could face Hayden. "I've been awake for a while now. I didn't want to get up though. I just feel like staying here."

"If you're like this when we just kiss and cuddle, then you're never gonna want to leave when we take things further."

"You have an extraordinarily high opinion of yourself, Mr. Christensen," teased Joe, moving in to make contact with Hayden's sweet smile. Hayden moved his head so that no contact was made.

"I seriously need to brush my teeth, and have a shower. You got any spare clothes that I can use?"

"Um.I think I can find some stuff for you to wear. You sure you don't want to stay in my bed a little longer."

"As tempting as that sounds, I think we should get this day going. I want to see more of the city, and you would make the perfect guide." Hayden moved in to attempt a kiss on Joe's lips.

"Sorry.I seriously need to brush my teeth, and have a shower!" Joe swiftly got out of the bed, and exited the room. He quickly came back and chucked a towel at Hayden. "Bathroom's down the hall. There should be a new toothbrush behind the mirror."

While Hayden was having his amazingly long shower, Joe was trying to pick out some clothes for Hayden to wear, but found the task very difficult. They were about the same size and build, so there was no problem of whether or not they will fit, but Joe worried that Hayden wouldn't like his style. He managed to get the task done, and threw in something extra for good measure. That little something brought pride to Joe's heart.

"That looks like a nice sweater." Hayden re-entered the room, his body glistening from the water. He came over to Joe's side of the bed and bent over to look through the clothes. Joe's couldn't take his eyes of Hayden's butt. The tightly wrapped towel showed every contour of his firm rear.

"Seen something you like?" asked Hayden, catching Joe off- guard.

"Yeah.definitely," replied Joe, as though mesmerised by Hayden's lean body.

Hayden was on a high. He was used to having people lust over him, but not by anyone he truly cared about. He didn't think he could fall for a person in such a small amount of time, especially with another man. However, he knew that he couldn't say it, not yet anyway. He needed to know how Joe felt about him, and not to mention in which direction his career will go if he did come out. But the next thing that happened made him forget all his worries in an instant, and created confusion, and then laughter.

"What's this doing here?" asked Hayden, picking up and Toronto Maple Leaf's hockey jersey that was hiding underneath the pile of clothes.

"I have family in Canada. They take me and my brothers to hockey games whenever we go there. I always buy a jersey for myself."

Discarding the stylish sweater that Joe had placed on top, Hayden proudly put on the jersey, and gave Joe a smile that could only be interpreted as gratitude.

As Joe was taking his shower, Hayden finished getting dressed. The room looked extraordinarily different in the daylight. A lot less cluttered and more calm. Hayden slumped onto the comfy armchair by the desk, absorbing the serenity that was now evident in the air. Looking over the desk, he saw a thick black work-journal. It surprised him that he hadn't noticed it before. Thinking that it was a book for Joe to workout his creative ideas, Hayden decided to pick it up and have a look through.

Words, thoughts, clippings from newspapers, extracts from poems, sketches and scribbles, but mostly photos.of Alex. Every photograph was of Alex. There were other people included in the pictures but all had Alex as the focus. Some of them were cropped, ripped even, so that Alex was the subject matter. The words denoted pain and anguish; of love unrequited. Captions like `thou heart was unjustly ripped" and "sweet sleep was the only escape" flooded every available space. Hayden knew exactly what it meant. He wasn't stupid. He decided to close the book and place it back on the desk.

Hayden decided to distract his thoughts by looking through Joe's collection of music. It didn't really work. Being fully aware that you're falling for a man that was infatuated with someone else could seriously unsettle a person.

"No Abba or Madonna Albums?" asked Hayden as Joe re-entered, already half dressed.

"Only one, Ray of Light, and you're looking in the wrong place. My feel good stuff I keep on the shelves. Where you are looking, under the bed, is for all my serious, moody stuff."

"You have a lot more moody music than you have `feel good'. Why is that, exactly?"

"I don't know? I just do," replied Joe, while putting on a jumper. The Last question made him look over to the desk, realising that the journal was where it shouldn't be. He walked over to the desk and placed the journal back in its drawer, and then locked it. "Are you hungry? I think the others have already started breakfast."

Hayden raised his eyebrows. All he had for sustenance lately was coffee. "I'm starving. I hope you and your friends make food as well as you make espressos."

All Joe could do was looked worried. "Um.."

The smell of pancakes permeated the air as soon as they came down the stairs. Joe wasn't surprised to see Tom and Kelly already busy with serving up a feast. He was more confused as to where they got the food from. The table was full with different breakfast foods; cereals, spreads for toast, eggs, bacon, sausages, and bran muffins.

"Where did all this come from?"

"We quickly went to the shops," replied Kelly, slowly gauging Joe's reaction. "Don't worry; it didn't cost us too much. I know you don't like us to pay for food while under your roof, but babe, your cupboards were bare!"

"I, for one, am grateful." Hayden took a seat at the table. He looked over to Joe to join him, and he reluctantly gave in.

"Oh yeah, by the way, when Alex and Tom woke up this morning, they found the back door open."

Joe looked over to Tom, who was concentrating on flipping pancakes. "What do you mean by open? Was it unlocked, or wide open?"

"Wide open," replied Tom, while transferring two pancakes to a dish.

This was strange. Only Joe's family and Tom had keys to the back door. Then it clicked. There's a spare key hidden in the garden, and only one other person knew about it.

"Lucas was here," mumbled Joe, shocked that Luke had came out of hiding, and chosen here as his first stop.

"What did you say?" asked Hayden. All he heard was a mumble. So did Kelly and Tom, for that matter.

"Luke must have been here looking for a place to crash. I've got to call Sarah." Joe leapt of his chair, and hustled out of the kitchen to use the phone in the living room.

"I take it Lucas is really important to Joe." Hayden was fishing for answers.

"Joe sees all of his friends as important to him," replied Kelly, realising that Hayden needed to know where he stood. "You're important to him, regardless of the amount of time you've known each other."

"How'd you know About Lucas?" Tom knew the answer, he just wanted verification, and find out how much Joe told Hayden.

"Joe told me about him while I was looking at the photos on the wall."

"And what else?"

"Just that he went missing." Hayden knew that there was more to the story, but he wasn't going to push the subject, not yet anyway. "And that he has a lot of problems."

Kelly took a mouthful of her yogurt and cereal. "Joe feels responsible for Luke. He feels that if he had looked after him more, Lucas wouldn't have turned out the way he did. We told him that Lucas would have turned out the way he did regardless."

"So, what are you two going to do for the rest of the day?" Tom interrupted, not liking where the conversation was going.

"Joe's gonna show me around London, maybe go to some of the art galleries."

"Boring," chimed Kelly, smiling when she turned to see Tom glaring at her. "Sorry, I'm an art student, and I love art galleries. It's just that you don't seem the type. Don't you want to see a football match?"

"You mean soccer, right?"

"Yes, but I mean football."

"Kel," Tom interjected. "No one's playing today, and you wouldn't be able to get tickets even if there were." Tom shifted his attention to Hayden. "Our friends are having a gig in Soho. You know where that is, right?"

"Yeah, it's just off Shaftesbury Avenue."

"It's a place called Paradiso. If you and Joe aren't doing anything later, maybe you could drop by, say around ten o'clock?"

Hayden just gave a slight nod to the idea.

"Sounds like a plan. I could do with some live music in my life." They all turned around to see Joe walking back into the kitchen, considerably more stressed than when he left. "Lucas went to see Sarah last night. He asked her for some money, but she refused. She wants me to meet up with her. Is that all right Hayden? It will be quick."

"Yeah.sure, I don't mind."

Kelly's face switched on. "And she's not the only one. Alex wants to talk to you about something. I don't know what about, but he does. I think it's about his relationship problems."

"Really...Where is Alex anyway?"

Kelly took a swig of her fruit juice. "He had to leave for another round in the ring with Jen. He'll see you at Paradiso, if you decide to go. Personally, I think you should get this out of the way."

"But why would Alex want to talk to me about Jen? We've never been close. Wouldn't he prefer to talk to Aidan, or Lucy, or even Tom? I would be the last person he would choose to confide in."

Hayden understood why. He had experienced some of the power Joe has over people. Within a matter of minutes of just talking with him, Hayden felt that he had known Joe for years, and could trust him with his heart and soul. However, the thought of Joe wasting his time listening to Alex's mundane relationship issues infuriated Hayden. It had now become Hayden's personal mission to remove Alex from the equation.

The Prince Charles Cinema off Leicester Square was already a familiar hangout for Joe and his crew, long before the trio got jobs there. The dirt cheap tickets were a blessing amongst the larger mainstream cinemas showing the latest big features at extortionist prices. The Prince Charles only showed films that were no longer on general release, and held world cinema, classics and independent films in equal regard with American productions.

Sarah had told Joe to meet her here, on familiar ground. They hadn't talked to one another for more than three weeks, the last time being the joint send-off party that their co- workers threw for them. That wasn't exactly a fun night out. It started of nicely, but it turned nasty when the two of them got in to a massive argument, ending with Sarah storming off and calling Joe a "fucking bastard". It was hard hating someone that you loved like a brother, especially if the hate was coming from an unknown place.

Her reflection in the window showed exactly how she felt; distorted, weak, tainted by a glaring light. She had decided to revert back into her Goth-self; not by much, but enough to be in mourning for a man who apparently is still alive. Tears were beginning to stir when she caught something else in the reflection.

"Hey bunny," Joe gave a weak smile, one that was looking for forgiveness.

Sarah turned away from the window to face Joe. Her voice was full of low, grating pain. "Please don't call me that. Not now."

"When did you dye your hair black?"

"Not long after I last saw you," replied Sarah, pulling a streak of hair behind her left ear. "Who's your friend? I thought you were with Tom and Kelly."

"I was, but Tom had to go to Sunday mass with his family, and Kelly went to have lunch with her brother and sister-in- law..This is Hayden."

"Hi." Hayden definitely felt awkward around Sarah. She must have that affect on people that don't know her. He didn't feel at all awkward around Joe's other friends. "I'm just gonna go buy some cigarettes, let you two have some privacy. I'll be back in ten."

As Hayden left, Sarah just had to say loudly, "He looks familiar," knowing exactly who he was. The smile from her joke only lasted six seconds, and the internal pain returned. "How'd you get shacked up with him?"

"Long story. Let's just leave it at that. How are you holding up?"

"With invisible strings." It was getting increasingly hard for Sarah to hold back the tears. "Why did I turn him away? If I gave him the money, he might have stayed."

Joe pulled her into a tight hug. She resisted at first, but she broke down in his arms, allowing herself to let out all the tears that she had kept for two months. "He would have used the money for more drugs, and you wouldn't have been able to keep him. He would have used every excuse to leave as soon as he got the cash. You did the right thing."

They both turned their heads to see if anyone was paying them any attention. David, a former co-worker, was behind the kiosk, trying his best to look as though he was doing something else. He was definitely cute.a bit too boyish for Joe's liking, though he was the same age. He could see why Luke took a liking to him.

Joe just had to unsettle him a bit. "You all right, David?"

"Um." David was unsettled as it is. "Not really. I was wondering if there was any news about Lucas."

"Not really," replied Joe. He didn't like getting others involved in their affairs. This was a family problem. He placed his head back on Sarah's shoulder. They stayed that way for a few minutes.

Sarah pulled away, her arms still locked around his waist. "How can I be in love a man who hurts me so much? Who allows himself to spiral out of control? I thought he was dead, Joe! And he shows up on my front door, casually asking for a loan! Now he's gone again."

"Don't worry. At least we know he's alive. I think he might show up at the gig tonight."

"What makes you think that?"

"Just a hunch. Are you gonna put in an appearance? It would be good for the others to know that you're still with us, and not drifting away."

Sarah's expression turned cold in an instant. She pushed away from the embrace. "What like how you drifted away' last year? When you ran away' to Art College and cut yourself off from all of us. When Lucas and me only saw you here, in the Prince Charles and you didn't even talk to us."

Joe's anger was rising, but curbed it out of love. "I had to work through some shit. Dealing with yours and Luke's problems at the same time wasn't exactly going to do me good."

"We didn't ask for you to deal with our shit. We just needed for you to be there. But instead, you did exactly what Lucas is doing right now, just in a different way."

"Look, can you take it outside."

Simultaneously, Joe and Sarah shouted, "SHUT UP, DAVID!" to which David frustratingly scratched the back of his head, and turned to rearrange the chocolate packets.

Joe had to back down. Sarah was right about all of it, and some of the lies in his head were corrected. "Look, are you gonna be at Paradiso later, or what?"

"I don't know. I guess...We'll see, okay?"

"Okay. I'll pay for your drinks if you do." Joe waited for her to react.

A slight devious smile came over Sarah's delicate features. "That sounds very tempting. I might take you up on that offer."

The two of them sitting on the floor of the Millennium Bridge eating their late lunch must have been a strange sight for passers-by. Joe had been taking pictures of Hayden all day at various spots all over London, having the model- release forms ready at each location. Hayden kept saying that it wasn't necessary but Joe insisted, joking that if he wanted to sell them to a cheesy fashion mag, Hayden couldn't do anything about it.

"Do you think I can bring my friends to the club?"

Joe looked up from his Chicken burger to meet Hayden's eyes. "Sure... Who? I didn't think that you knew anyone in London."

"Well, I don't. Not really, anyway. What I should have said was `work colleagues'."

"Oh..Well if you think they'd like to come, then you should give them a call and invite them out. We can swing by their places before we hit the club." Joe handed Hayden his mobile phone.

"Hey Jake, its Hayden..Yeah, I'm good..Is Anna with you..That's good, it means I only have to give this message only once...Would you two like to go to a cub tonight?......Cool...Um, hold on." as Hayden turned to ask a question, Joe pulled a Franken monster face.

"Cut it out," Hayden's face barely able to stay straight. "Stop, please? I need to know what time we should be there."

"Tell them we'll pick them up at 8 o'clock. If we get to the club early, we can hang out at the bar."

Hayden relayed the message and said his farewells. He then leaned in to kiss Joe. Just as they were really getting into it, a snobbish office gentleman walked by and mumbled, "Disgraceful".

Yeah.Definitely.." replied Joe loudly. "..That suit you're wearing is ATROCIOUS!"

The snobbish gentleman's final reaction caused both Hayden and Joe to collapse on each other, laughing their arses off.

"Come on, let's go!" Hayden got up and offered his hand to help Joe up. "Tonight, I think we gotta at least be decent."

"Being decent is the last thing on my mind."

"That devil grin is gonna get me into a whole lot of trouble!"

TO BE CONTINUED