Insecure Thoughts

By moc.liamg@guhgubtac

Published on Aug 31, 2016

Gay

Disclaimer. Don't read this if you are below the legal age in wherever it is you live. This story is fiction. No character are real. Also other stuff that will not get people suing people in here should be assumed. --- Donate to nifty it's an awesome site that I have used for a long time to read all the heartbreak, raunchy and happy ending stories. If you want to continue to read my stories and other kinds on here donate so that they can continue to function. I love you nifty. ---- This is another story I have no clue what I'm doing again. If you hate the grammar then come at me. No not really if it really erks you edit it and send it to me corrected. Send me your comments last story I said send me constructive criticism and it was great. This time do the same but say one nice thing and one really mean thing. Tell me if you hate this story or love it. I read all your comments. Thanks for reading ---------

Insecure Thoughts Part 1

I first saw him on the train on the way home from work, he took my breath away the moment i noticed him, he was so handsome . I didn't realize it at the time but he noticed me too and later said he thought it was love at first sight but that's just bullshit maybe lust but not love but that's beside the point. I tried not to stare but how couldn't I he encompassed everything I saw attractive in a man. He was tall 6'5 and had a gorgeous everything. Short Black curly hair, beautiful grey eyes, a hot neatly trimmed beard, beautiful dark skin, And stocky with powerful arms and legs with a slight pudge in the middle that still had the form of abs. I could go on about how hot he is but point is He was super hot and out of my league. I usually just played a game on my phone or read some Manga but Throughout this train ride, that usually took a long time,I stole glances at him whenever it didn't seem obvious. I eventually had to get off at the next stop and felt disappointed because I would probably never see him again. I got off and stole a final glance at him and we made eye contact, he smiled at me and I smiled back at the sight of his smile and A split second later I rammed into the person In Front of me so hard they stumbled. "I'm so sorry" I said, "don't be sorry watch where you're going, asshole." I was so mortified and embarrassed I glanced back at the guy and he was having a fit of laughter at my dismay. i had such an overwhelming mixture of emotions I blushed like a little kid which was awful because even though I was Latino and brown my skin was light and made it incredibly obvious to anyone when I blushed. He kept laughing and I turned an even darker shade of red if that was possible and the doors closed. I left to go home and wallow in my embarrassment. at least I get to relax the rest of the night with my pets jinx the cat and lucky the dog and my bong. I contemplated that scene the rest of the night. It wasn't even that funny for him to laugh that hard why are good looking people such assholes.

The next day I took the train as I always did and low and behold I saw him again but I was far less stunned at his beauty after remembering how hard he laughed yesterday at my chronic clumsiness. I choose to ignore him and just pass the time playing a game on my phone. The train was kind of empty at that time so I could hear him talking to female passenger who was also very beautiful. From what I picked up in their conversation, He was an actual douche (as I suspected). He was hitting on her and harassing her. He said many inappropriate comments about where he would take her out and how he would make her feel in bed with his big dick. God fucking dammit Another typical straight guy who thinks he owns the world. I love it that I am able to lose attraction to assholes (or so I thought at the time). At least the girl shut him down fast and told him she's not interested in talk from a small dicked guy that thinks women owe him something for even breathing. I failed to stifle a laugh and ended up snorting (ugh I'm such a dork). They turned my way and he was noticeably angry and she just chuckled too. At that moment The train arrived at the stop and she got off leaving me and him to be the only passengers on the train. Ugh just my luck. The train continued and I went back to my phone and started reading the manga "Sono Mama de" but started to feel uncomfortable as I felt someone looking at me so I looked up which was a a big mistake because I immediately made Eye contact with this guy and he was glaring at me but for a second I also saw something else behind his still very beautiful eyes besides anger it looked like what I thought a hungry animal about to pounce on his prey looked like. I got scared and chose to just look back at my phone until my stop would come but I continued to feel his glare. I heard movement and felt him sit one seat away from me. I continued to feel his stare and a a moment courage or stupidity hit me and I looked up at his eyes but they didn't seem angry anymore just curious but still with a hint of some sort of hunger. I shifted in my seat slightly but continued having this awkward stare down. After a minute or so of this I looked away and he spoke to me in the most gorgeous deep voice that made my heart skip. He said "Ha you blinked" What the fuck was he a kid!?! I looked back and he smiled the smile he did yesterday . " you are really weird you know" he told me . I don't know why but the remark rubbed me the wrong way. " Me weird? You just acted like a little kid with me and that lady who didn't deserve that harassment. You are an asshat." His eyes looked stunned by my remark almost as if he didn't expect me to say that which I get because I am shy and insecure but that doesn't t mean I'm gonna let people walk over me. He smiled and said " me an ass? Why cuz I laughed at how u almost pushed a dude off the train? haha I think anyone would've laughed at that scene especially at your cute blush u looked like a little school girl but that guy was a little too mean in his words." Ob my god he called me cute and I didn't think it was possible to reach a new hue of red on my face but I felt I did. He just laughed at my embarrassment. "That ...that isn't the only reason you are a twat. why would u treat that lady like that? women have it hard enough in society being women but why do u have to harass her like that? women feel scared when men no matter how entitled and good looking they are come on to them because if they reject them they have no way of knowing how the man will react. I mean did you see yourself when I laughed ...you looked like you were about to jump someone." I stuttered but managed to say what needed to be said. he continued to look at me but his eyes softened. " you know what you're right. I'm sorry if I'm such an ass or twat as you put It I shouldn't have done that to her either I'm just going through some things." I was shocked he apologized and showed a glimpse of vulnerability maybe he wasn't so bad. I thought and contemplated this for a second and at that moment He stealthily came to the seat next to me before I noticed and whispered In my ear pulling me from my thoughts " so you think I'm good looking?" After that I knew I eventually had to control my blushing or it would be the death of me. " I...I didn't say you were good looking" "yeah u did entitled maybe I am and good looking well we already know what u think" I was getting tired of blushing and once again found momentary courage from God knows where "fine u are good looking, super good looking so good looking I can't describe u or point to one specific thing because you seem perfect everywhere" he once again seemed at a loss for words. "Ha well glad we got the truth out hehe and hey don't sell yourself short you are pretty hot too" wait did he compliment me again first cute now hot what was happening here "aren't u straight? Why are u complimenting me are u just trying to embarrass me some more?" " I'm mostly straight but I have dabbled with guys. I'm complimenting you because if I can borrow some of your words you are good looking hot cute handsome and perfect to me and you don't even notice it which makes it even more adorable." I was completely at a loss for words this guy actually thought I was good looking did he need glasses like me I'm just plain me witty, sarcastic and sometimes funny according to my friends but still I have no confidence in myself to believe he was actually interested in me or if he was and just wanted to use me like most guys do "I...I.. My stop is next .." His eyes showed what I thought was disappointment but it was probably just my wishful thinking "ah well see you tomorrow if u take this train again I'm going this route everyday for work so I will probably/ hope I see you more if today and yesterday are any indication of your schedule and have a nice night" I was gonna take the train again like I did everyday but I didn't say anything I just waved goodbye and gave a faint smile. Ugh why do I fall for people so easily this guy seems nice but hes probably just playing with me to get a reaction and if he really does find me attractive it's probably just because he wants sex with someone who he thinks is an easy target, if he is actually interested as he says. I wouldn't mind having sex with him though I'm shy but years of repressing my sex drive until I was 20 made me hyper sexual. I would have sex with almost any guy that showed interested in me which was bad when coupled with insecurity and low self worth because it made me get into risky behavior and just made me feel worse after. I think I'll take the train that's a few minutes later from now on I can feel myself falling for this guy like I always do with anyone that shows the slightest interest but I still felt he was bad news. However; he did seem genuine in his apology ugh i don't even know his name and he already has me frazzled if I get any closer I might be obsessed and get my heart broken like always with my unrequited crush. I think distance is best I always did fall deep in my crushes on guys in high school and college with the straight boys which ultimately ended in a bro friendship where they tell me about their detailed sex lives with the opposite gender that just puts me down in a deeper hole in my mind. God I should get a psychologist or psychiatrist whatever the fuck it is. At least I live a comfortable life with a job I love and get to go home to my two loves and videos games. I hope tomorrow is better than the past two days.

I made it a point to stay a few extra minutes in the lab than I was suppose to just so I wouldn't run into the dude, I just realized I didn't even know his name and I was infatuated by him on a superficial level but maybe also him but I mean i didn't even know him. Ah I need to forget it or I'm gonna get hurt again like I always do. I made my way to the station and the ride was smooth sailing i didn't see him or anyone for that matter it was such a late ride in the night. I made it to my station and got off and was met with a shady person hanging around down there I was making my way until he shouted at me to give him my money and valuables while pointing a knife at me I was so scared and shaking and Bout to hand it over until from the corner of my eye the man was punched and fell on the floor from the force and before I even processed what happened I was forcibly pulled to the streets where there were at least a few other people. It wasn't until I caught my breath that i noticed it was that the person that saved me was guy that has been on my mind the past few days. "Why are you here ?" I asked surprised at seeing him "saving you, duh." He said "dont u get off after my stop why are u here?" "wow not even a thank you, for saving my life just more accusative questions" he while wearing his heart skipping smile "I'm...I'm sorry thank you it's just I'm surprised you are here you usually stay on the train and I'm just kind of shaken up by that guy we should call the police." "No point he is long gone and hey its ok to be scared this has never happened to you right?" I nodded " so u have a right to be scared and shaken up and to answer your question I actually moved here yesterday from my house and now I live close by the station." " oh... But why are u still at the station u were on the train 10 mins before me u would have gotten here a long time ago" I said " well i was kinda waiting for you. You weren't on the train so I thought it was weird and something told me I should wait for you in case you were running late to get off and also because I wanted to talk to you again and lucky I did or I would never have gotten the chance to talk to you if I wasn't here when I was" I once again blushed but I hoped it wasn't noticeable because I ran so fast to get out but that hope was shot when I saw his goofy smile at my blushing ugh why did he like tormenting me like this . "Now it's my turn for the questions. why did you get here so late, u seem like ur usually punctual?""I..I had some extra work to do in the lab..." Holy shit he caught me I hope he believed my excuse but my pause made it seem like I was just thinking of an excuse curse my slowness to these situations. " oh ok are you ok to get home? " "yes!" I sad a little to excited to leave. "I should be on my way" as I started to walk again I noticed I was shaking my legs slightly and I almost stumbled "woah there u don't seem ok to keep going alone where do u live? " ugh just my luck now he's a nice guy when I don't want him to be " i live 7 blocks from here" "what! And ur planning to walk at this time of night alone and shaking like that? You know what we are going to my place I only live a block away from here." I didn't feel like going but I knew he was right and Brenda, my roommate and best friend, would be back from her parents and could feed lucky and jinx if it got too late I could just send her a text that I was going late and to plz feed them. " ok " I muttered to him "Good its this way he pulled me and I realized he was holding my hand. wtf how didn't I notice ugh maybe this wasn't a good idea but that thought was pushed back in my mind as he pulled and his hand felt so warm and inviting. I sent the text and we were on our way " oh I'm Robel btw and I know it's weird but blame my mother. what's

your name?" "I'm Harold" I muttered. Even his name was as unique and exquisite as his appearance.

We made our way to his place, which was really luxurious and big. he made me take off my jacket and shoes and sit on his couch. I let my eyes wonder the studio apartment it was really nice. Twice as big a space as mine but with boxes everywhere and just a bed and a couch. He went into the kitchen and came back with a glass of water and our hands touched and I felt a spark this time and his familiar warmth again. He sat down and started to stare and check me out which was surprising considering I wasn't much to look at . I was 6'0 and chubby with no real muscle definition. I had black wavvy hair that I just let do whatever it wants until I get it cut, brown eyes and nice heart shaped lips which are pretty much the only thing I liked on myself,smooth hairless skin which I didn't like because I love hairy guys and was tan but very light for my Salvadorean heritage. As I looked at him he was even better looking than on the train he wore his work dress shirt and pants but had unbuttoned the top buttons and I could see an unbelievably hot carpet of hair that was probably all over his body I was feeling very horny which was made worse by the fact I hadn't had sex in 2 months. I was starting to get an erection so I crossed my legs and he finally spoke "how are you feeling now?" "I'm better I think I might be able to go now. " stay a bit longer just to be sure " I was getting very anxious but conceded"okay..." I answered "What do you do for work?" He asked " I work in A lab I'm a botanist. I study different plants for different things mostly for agriculture. I work for on different projects but my personal goal for going into this field of work is to find a crop that is easy to cultivate but has more nutrition than corn, which is actually not healthy the way most farmers grow it..." I didn't realize it but I kept enthusiastically talking about my research and projects for longer than I should have and didn't realize he hadn't said anything in a while until I looked back at him and he was smiling and looking at me deeply I tried not blush but failed once again" sorry I probably bored you while I was raving about my research once I start I don't notice I'm actually putting people to sleep" "if I was bored I would have stopped you but I wasn't you just looked so interested in it I didn't want to stop you. Anyone can see you really care about your research you really light up while talking about it, it's really cute." he said and chuckled. I realized He called me cute again and turned pink. He chucked at me again. I wish he knew what false hope a hunk like him gives me and how bad it hurts that nothing will ever happen " what do you do?" I stuttered "I'm an investment banker for different companies I like it a lot because of the thrill of making money but I don't really care about the money itself I was taught to be very frugal so I mostly just take what I need which is why I take the train even but this place doesn't show it I guess. I needed to move closer to work now because of a new deal and I had to take this apartment as it was the only thing available On short notice" "wow that's really cool you must make like millions for companies to afford a place like this ." "Closer to billions but who's counting? You can't take anything with you when you die so why hold on to the material? I got this place because I had to move and this was the only thing available but it's a little too luxurious for me. I shouldn't complain though I've been blessed with the luck to live and afford this place so I might as well enjoy it while I have it." " wow you are way different than the way you come off as. I think people should enjoy life because it is what is here and now in front of you and people should live life as happy as they can be and take every opportunity life gives. Missed opportunities are the worst. I might be shy and insecure but that doesn't mean I let that inhibit what I want to do or experience. I am still cautious though in not repeating mistakes thinking they are opportunities. " I turned and looked at him again and He looked at me again with the hunger from the train "you're absolutely right people should take every opportunity life gives or risk missing out on something amazing" and the next thing happened in a fraction of a second he leaned over put his hand on my cheek and before I knew it his lips were on mine giving me what I thought was the best kiss of my life. he pushed his tongue to my lips trying to pry my mouth open and I allowed him access. Our tongues clashed and danced over each other and he seemed to want to dominate my mouth and I let him it made the kiss so many times more intense I felt I was having and orgasm and holy shit I was!!! I was moaning and groaning in his mouth and and so was he. He pulled back and looked at me I felt like I must have lucked so crazy overcome with lust I felt like I forgot to breath and swallow and I realized my mouth was open drooling almost wanting to entice him to come back. he just stared at me and started running his hands over me I felt amazing this was actually the first time Someone has made me come and they didn't even touch me this guys is dangerous but I didn't care I wanted more of him. I leaned over to try to kiss him again but before I reached he pushed me on my back leaning over me and attacked my mouth and again and I felt amazing like I was floating. he broke away and placed small kisses along my jaw and neck tracing it up to my ears that were always super sensitive . He was running his hands all over me and I started to get over my shock and started doing the same he felt amazing he was so hard and big it made me feel small but protected. He started to unbutton my shirt. When he started to run his finger tips over my torso and brushed them against my now hard pierced nipples. "Wow you're not really as shy or insecure as u want people to believe or u are and you're just really big sexual deviant like me" before I could respond he started to pull and twist my nipples. I felt like I was on fire and I started to tremble it felt so good .He got off me leaving me a little disappointed but started to pull me up onto my feet and I was again a little wobbly and he ended up catching me in his big arms and leading me to the bed I felt awesome like I was dreaming I couldn't believe this was happening with someone as hot as him. He pushed me gently on the bed kissing me and igniting me again and this time I wrapped my arms and legs around his back I didn't want to let him go. He felt so big and strong and warm I felt I might cum again what the hell he hadn't even touched my dick or ass and I was gonna come a second time. I felt like this was the first time I was having real sex and that the guys before this were just practice for the motions leading up to this moment. A part of me wanted to pull away I felt like I didn't deserve this or that he was just using me like all the other guys did but I didn't care sex was sex I guess and I chose to push that thought out of my head and just chose to focus on him and how good he was making me feel. He pressed himself even closer and I felt something poke my butt and I realized it was his cock through his pants. it felt huge probably the biggest I've felt in real life. He started leaving small kisses down my body making me tremble more. I never thought sex could feel this good. He got to my nipples and started to kiss, nibble, bite and twist them gently I was trembling as my pierced nipples were always sensitive and aroused me easily. As he got to my crotch he swiftly pulled my pants and underwear off leaving me in only my unbuttoned shirt I felt so exposed as he looked at me from above I felt so embarrassed. He came back down to my lips in another explosive tongue kiss while running his hands over my thighs pushing them to my stomach. He started to run his hands around my 5.5 in dick but never actually touching it and lightly brushed my balls down to my ass making me shake. He started kissing down my body again and licked me around my penis before flicking his tongue over the head before taking it all in his mouth in one move leaving me breathless and convulsing. I felt like I was about to come but he quickly pulled off and licked my balls lightly and then he swiftly turned me over on my hands and knees and went straight for my ass. He smacked my cheeks with both palms, pushed my cheeks apart and spit at my hole making me shudder. He then put his tongue right next to my slightly hairy hole. The moment I felt his tongue I screamed as he gave the most intense pleasure I've felt in my life. He started making out with my hole as if it was a mouth and I felt his tongue push inside me opening me even wider I felt amazing but then as I was once agin close to climax he pulled away leaving me breathless "don't move I'll be right back." I did as he said and waited for him to return which wasn't long. When he returned I immediately felt him again at my hole and his continued assault on it made me want to come but almost as if he felt I was to come he pulled away stroking and pulling my cheeks leaving me wanting more but continuing right after he felt I was off the edge and I felt him continue this for what I felt like forever. " plz stop you're making me crazy I want to come so bad." "No!" He answered very matter of factly making me even hornier if that was possible. I didn't want it to end but I also did as I felt I was close to orgasm so many times but he wouldn't stop no matter how much I gasped. " Don't move and keep your eyes closed he commanded in his voice." I felt so good I just followed his commands and felt him get on the bed and then in an instant he pulled my whole body over his in the 69 position which was kind of a shock as I was a big and I was met with one of the most beautiful sights that still makes my mouth water after seeing it after all this time. His dick looked so good it was so very big, thick and strong like him about 10 in, and leaking so much precum it was alarming. This was the biggest dick I had seen in my life and it made my mouth water I wanted to lick it and I felt he wanted me to do it to and as I was about to touch the big mushroom head with my tongue to lick his precum I felt his tongue at my dick also and I moaned and the moment my mouth opened he shoved his dick inside. It was a shock and i was conflicted on whether I should like him taking command of me as it made me feel used like always but aroused beyond comprehension but I let go of that because this cock tasted amazing the pecum tasted so good and felt like it would never run out and the head was so spongy and good I was in heaven and my element as I was a pretty good cocksucker or at least I would hope I was after all this time so I immediately tried using all the technique in my Arsenal but it was difficult as I felt I was gonna come again and again but the feeling was stopped when he pushed my prostate under my balls and continued sucking my cock rapidly making me experience a dry orgasm which was slightly painful but amazing. I tried to continue but I was riding out the feeling until he grabbed my head and put it back on his cock to put me back to work and I did after 10 mins I was able to take more than 3/4 of his length in my throat but he seemed to have so much stamina I felt I wasn't good enough at my cock sucking but then I felt him come in my throat flooding it and making me choke but I continued to take it and as it overflowed down my mouth it was so good and surprising I also felt him go back at my dick and all of a sudden felt him shove his whole finger in my hole I gasped taking his still gushing dick even deeper I felt amazing like this was not real but it was as I felt another slight pain when he shoved a second finger and started to rock his cock inside my mouth not losing any enthusiasm even after coming himself . I felt so good but after a while of this he pushed me off and pushed me down into the bed as he got up and started leaning on top of me pressing me deeper into the mattress while passing his dick through my ass crack letting the head pull at my hole and his hairy chest daubed against my back making me feel so many sensations, I was in heaven. He then stopped and I heard the sound of the familiar tear of a condom and heard it snap on his dick and felt him pour lube at my hole while he continued grinding at my hole . He continued grinding but sometimes the head would sink into the hole and push back out pulling my hole making me feel his dickhead at it. As I was getting used to the pulling sensation He spontaneous plunge the head in my hole making me scream as it was very painful and big. "It's ok, it's ok, you're gonna be ok." He calmly said. he started running his hands all over my body. I wanted him to pull out it hurt so bad but he didn't move he just leaned over my back leaving tiny kisses between my shoulder blades and back and his hands continuing to massage me all over not missing a single place to touch. I felt his hands come up my neck to my face turning my head gently and I was met with yet another passionate kiss that made me melt and I didn't feel that he was plunging in deeper and was already 5 in deep inside I stared to feel an intense pleasure inside me and I felt him start to slowly pull out and back in a few I inches and then slowly adding more and after 30 mins I felt him inside me completely I felt weird I had never felt so full and stretched in my life it felt amazing no one had ever reached these depths in me before. He continued a slow pace while continuing to run his hands over me and nibbling on my ear putting his full weight on me pushing me ever deeper in the bed rubbing his hairy torso on my back trickling me with the hair. Turning me on more. If felt I might go crazy I never felt such intense pleasure and he picked up his pace little by little before he started pulling his whole length leaving the head only and swiftly pounding all the way in making me gasp and scream every time he did. He paused at one long stroke and added more lube before plunging straight back in continuing his assault for what felt like eternity before adding lube again on another long stroke and continuing His plundering I felt I was about to come again but before I did he pulled out completely and instantly flipping me on my back and shoving all the way back in in one fluid motion making me scream. He stayed like that deep inside and stared at me. He was beautiful he was glistening with sweet and I saw the veins on his muscles and felt the heat coming off his body he looked like a god towering over me granting me my deepest darkest wish of my life. I saw him bite his lip and I leaned up to get another taste of them but he pulled back making me feel dejected but he continued going back and ended up pulling me up with him before landing on his back and wrapping his hairy arms around me pressing me against his chest which felt amazing with the dark carpet rubbing against my nipples and dick as the tiny hairs would leave an amazing sensation on the wet head as he rubbed against me and kissed me again shoving his tongues deeper and exploring my mouth Raven more. I pulled away to catch my breath and I was now straddling him and I felt very exposed all of sudden which was weird considering all we had done up to this point. "Ride me " he said breaking my thoughts. I was surprised but decided to go along with his demand trying to turn so I was facing away from him but he grabbed my hips and stopped me" no face front and look at me while u do it" I felt embarrassed and flushed but he smiled at me and making me feel so warm so I complied and started squating up and down his shaft feeling him rub against my prostrate at every inward and outward thrust. After a few minutes I felt like I was about to come and tired of the squating so I started speeding up and as I was riding him faster he suddenly pulled all the way down quickly on the longest stroke I had done making me gasp in pleasure as I felt him be the deepest tonight. He stopped and pulled me to him shoving his tongue in my mouth and running his hand over my nipple and the other massaging one butt cheek I felt he was always keeping me on the edge he pushed me back on my back and leaned over me slowly thrusting his big dick again for another eternity I felt like I was really on the edge this time and there was nothing holding me back as I wrapped my arms on his back and my legs on his ass this time he seemed to be close too and wanting to jump over the edge finally and he started thrusting the fastest he had all night jack harming me and pounding my prostate at every turn making me moan and writhe. He leaned down and started pinching my nipples and as I felt him thrust I felt my dick rub up against his treasure trail and he once again kissed me which was the final nail in that coffin as it triggered the most intense orgasm I felt in my life I felt my body was convulsing and I was shooting cum on his chest and mine and on my face and over my head everywhere basically and as I felt my hole spasm around his oversized member I felt my hole grow tighter or his dick bigger or both and I felt the power of his orgasm unloading inside the condom but never slowing his pace. After I felt myself start to come down from what I felt was the best high of my life did I feel him slow down and eventually stop but still stay deeply inside me. he collapsed on top of me as we just tried to get our breathing back to normal I felt amazing. I never wanted this feeling to end I felt like I could go to sleep but the reality hit me that this was not a good idea as most of the guys are annoyed to see me still here after they came. He eventually got up to go to the bathroom and threw the condom away I stayed in the bed trying to get up but I felt so tired and sore I just kept looking at him as he came back with a pair of boxers on and left to the kitchen and I tried to not freak out that this guy that was beyond my league actually had sex with me and made Me have the most intense experience of my life I was pulled from my thoughts when he came back and put a cold glass of water next to my cheek. "Thank you." I said leaning up and drinking it all slowly while he sat down with a moist rag and cleaned the drying cum and sweat off my body. I felt good again but weird as no guy had ever done this before. I tried to get up and I felt wobbly again and he pulled me back to lay on the bed turned off the light, spooned up behind me and pulled a blanket over us. I felt so good and comfortable I never wanted this feeling to end but alas I've had these thoughts before and the few guys that may want a cuddle buddy wake up in the morning they not even remember my name and unhappy to see me still there. I was lost in my thoughts when I heard him softly snoring behind me I felt really happy but really sad as I knew I really needed to pull away as I was falling for this guy and this was probably some time thing. After a few minutes passed that I was sure he was sound asleep I got up on unsteady legs again but balanced myself on the wall and started collecting my clothes and dressed as quietly as possible Without my underwear as I couldn't find it but I just wanted to get out so I put on my clothes walked out and gently closed the door. As I walked to the elevator I started replaying the events and I felt like it was a dream but it wasn't and then I felt guilt like I didn't deserve such a wonderful experience with such a great person. The bad thoughts of bad experiences from the past kept coming up and I knew it was best I left as I was always the only one who wanted more when sex was just sex. I made my way outside and slowly walked alone at 3 in the morning crying as this may have been one of the most happy experiences of my life but like all past experiences like this it had to come to an end.

----- End of part 1. Don't hurt me plz I'm srry I'm a terrible writer. Copyright @ Henry G

Next: Chapter 2


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