Chapter 9
With the scream of the sirens as a guide, Tom and Paul head off to follow the Ambulance that is carrying Bill and Ike. With no words spoken, none needed, for the feeling of extreme anxiety was immense in the car, they follow the flashing lights through the dark of night. Paul's mind was filled with anger and frustration over just finding out about Ike, and now possibly loosing him to what ever illness he is battling. Reaching the Emergency Entrance to the Hospital where they had spent the night before with Doreen, Tom realizes that they are parked in the same spot that they had parked in almost 24 hours earlier. Entering the Hospital, the scene was very close to that of last night. The faces of the people in the waiting room, most of them that is, were different, but that was all. Standing behind the desk was the familiar face of the charge nurse in command of the Emergency Room Admittance Desk, looking even more tired and haggard as she did last night. Looking up from her paperwork, she recognized the two men. "Back again? Who now?" Her voice slurs from the obvious effects of alcohol.
"We are here to see Isaiah Johansen." Tom shouts over the roar of people in the hall and the screaming baby in it's mother's arms next to him as she speaks frantically about some problem, to whom ever might understand her native tongue.
The Nurse looks up at the two and like an automaton asks, "Friend or family?"
Tom screams out over the raucous child's screaming, "HE'S MY FATHER!"
Tom wasn't certain, but it seemed to him, that after he screamed out his response the waiting room noise dropped about 100 decibels in volume.
The nurse moves around finally displaying her name tag of "Gloria" and grabs a book and looks up the name. "I'm sorry, he isn't hear."
Tom slams his fist on the counter and screams, "NOW LISTEN HERE!!!" Paul grabs his lovers shoulder and calms him down.
"Gloria," Paul takes a long breath to calm the nervous situation that they are in, "Isaiah Johansen was just brought in on that Ambulance we followed in. Please Gloria, where would Isaiah and the man that rode with him be?"
"One moment please..." as Gloria picks up the phone and dials, Tom looks over to Paul who is trying to stop himself from letting a tear flow out of his eye. "O.K., thank you," as she hangs up the phone the two men are staring at her for the information that is driving the anxiety so high. "Isaiah Johansen was taken directly to I.C.U., second floor from the main floor, up three floors from here. Mr Torgel is in the observation room of I.C.U. Mr. Johansen is in room 318."
"Thank you, Gloria." Tom says as they head down the hall. Paul can hardly keep up with Tom as he is almost running to the elevator. As they stand waiting for the elevator to get to the floor, an old man, drunk from cheap wine, staggers over to Tom and grabs his shoulder for support. "Hey bud," the drunk slurs, "you got a dollar to give someone who needs a cup of coffee?" As he speaks he loses a bit of saliva from his mouth.
Tom grabs the bum and throws him across the hall, landing hard against the opposite side. "Get off me you bum!" As the man staggers down the hall, the door to the elevator finally opens and they board. Tom is overflowing with adrenaline and is standing there breathing hard. Paul looks over to Tom and isn't sure what just happened, but knows he has just seen a side of Tom that he doesn't really like.
The elevator door opens, they look right, then left and see Bill pacing in the hall. Tom walks up to Bill embracing him with a hug, as the two men hold each other and overwhelmed with emotion start silently sobbing, holding each other for what ever comfort they can give. Paul walks over to the two men, feeling awkward, three being a crowd. The two men release each other and Bill leads them to a room. They enter, and see Ike, lying on a bed, hooked up to multiple machines, all viewed through a one way mirror. Tom turns and looks at Bill. "Are you going to tell me what the hell is going on! Or am I gonna have to fucking guess?!" he shrilled.
"Guys," Bill starts opening up, "Please, have a seat," as Bill gestures to the chairs, "Ike and I really, really, didn't want you two to find out this way, we were going to tell you, but he wanted to tell you himself."
"Tell us what?" Tom's voice filled with anxiety as he looks toward Bill, standing with his back to the glass. Directly behind, he could also see Ike through the mirror, hooked up to all those machines, and his heart is filled with grief.
"About three months ago," Bill starts, "Ike was having major problems with kidney stones. The Doctors ordered surgery to remove a massive stone and found out from his blood tests that he had developed Chronic Renal Failure. We had been able to control the problems with pain and the toxins with dialysis and morphine, but for the last week, the drugs haven't been working well enough to control the pain." Bill turns and looks lovingly at Ike in the other room. "Ike battled with the idea of contacting you before he died. He didn't want to cause you grief, with coming to grips with the reality of your true parentage, and then his impending death on top of that. He loves you so much, he has collected everything he could about you." Bill chuckles as he turns back to look at Paul, "like newspaper clippings of business ventures, and high school newspaper articles about the young athlete. He is so proud of you, that he couldn't help getting to know you even if it was for a short time." Bill turns back to look at Ike, "we talked it over for almost a month; should we, or shouldn't we contact you. Ike finally decided that he had to get to know you before he died. I just don't know what I will do when he isn't here anymore." Bill starts to cry as Tom stands, walks over to Bill, takes him in his arms and comforts him.
"Do the doctors have any ideas what that might help him?" Paul asks, voice filled with emotion.
"The doctors said..." Bill choking back the tears, "right before you came up in the elevator, that if he wakes up from the coma, the only thing that might help him is a transplant, but there is so very little time to find a compatible donor, and it must be a perfect match of blood type."
Paul looks to Tom, as he looks on to Ike and Bill, Tom can see the wheels of thought spinning in Tom's head.
"Breakfast," is the first word that Doreen heard as she woke up. The obnoxiously cheery candystriper who came in to deliver her breakfast was "bopping around" the room, as if she was on speed. The sight of the young girl's uniform and the smell of the food, compounded by the sudden brightness of the window blinds being burst open, was more than Doreen could handle. Just as the striper came over and delivered the platter, she looked at Doreen and said, "Is there anything that I can get you?" With that, Doreen couldn't hold back the morning sickness that had started overtaking her the minute the smell of the food reached her nose, and Doreen heaved all over the young lady. The young girl just looked at Doreen in complete horror, with arms outstretched and palms up in the air looking at Doreen with the expression of "What the hell?"
Doreen looks over the uniform of the lady and starts to giggle at the mess that she just made and says, "Yeh, get a mop and clean this place up before I smell this food again and give your uniform an even coloring." With that she dumps the food off the tray, rolls over and tries desperately not to laugh.
Slumbering on for the next hour or so, Doreen hears a gentle knock on the door, "Come in," she replies, as she looks toward the door as Dr Anita Yuri enters.
"So," Anita greets her patient, "I hear you had a bit of morning sickness today... hum?" Anita gives a bit of sarcastic question to her accented tone, with her left eyebrow raised, looking down at Doreen as she sits on the edge of the bed.
With a bit of searching in her voice for a reprimand from her Doctor, "Yes I did," Doreen states, "I guess I should apologize to the young lady for soiling her uniform?" as she looks up at Anita.
"Well..." Anita starts off, "I don't think that will be necessary, you see Doreen," Anita moves close to Dor and in almost a whisper, "you couldn't have picked a better target. I hate her constant cheeriness too!" Both women break out with laughter. "And now my silly woman," Anita tries to stop laughing, "let's broach the subject that you brought up late last night, about the paternity of the children?...." Doreen gets serious and looks up at Anita as she reaches for Doreen's chart. "I called the lab late last night," Anita begins in her heavy Hindu drawl, "to inquire the whereabouts of the pour little lost child. The lab has been awaiting contact by the family to make burial arrangements. If you feel it's necessary to do this, we can do it now, with no real reason to contact Carlos's family." Anita is very serious as she looks over to Doreen laying in bed, "but by all means, you must be honest with Tom, especially after your call to him last night."
Doreen look's over to the table, where the phone rests, "I have to be honest with Tom and Paul. It will be the first step in being honest with everyone and most importantly... with myself." She feels a tear welling up and tries desperately not to cry as she looks on to the caring face of her doctor, "but Anita, I know within my heart, the child is not Tom's. I'm sure of it. We haven't had successful intercourse with each other for almost two months. "In fact," Dor pauses, "it was about two weeks before I met up with Carlos, my God, two weeks! How could I think I could pass that one off!" The tears well up inside her as she is unable to control the feelings anymore, and weeps silently into her hands.
Anita leans over and holds her patient in her arms. "Have you thought about the baby, are you going to keep it?"
Looking up to Anita with tears running down her soft cheeks, "I can't abort it, I will give the child up for adoption." Dor busts into tears and falls back into the arms of Anita.
"Don't fret my dear, all will be just fine..." Anita sighs as she reaches for the phone, "now lets make the call and order the tests. We will know everything when Tom does get here, O.K.?" As Anita picks up the phone and dials, Dor is still held by one arm of her doctor, resting against her breasts. Realizing something deep inside her, that she is attracted to Anita sexually, then asks herself wonderingly, "I can't be lesbian, could I?..." * * * * * *
Paul wakes from a very uncomfortable sleep, sitting up on an institutional vinyl couch that should have been discarded years ago. Tom was still asleep, leaning on his shoulder, in the same position that he had held him in earlier that morning when he cried himself to sleep. Tom went through an array of emotions, the hours before their sleep; from hatred directed at Ike for coming into his life so shortly before his impending death, to his parents for not telling him the truth, toward Paul for just being within striking distance, and even at Doreen for just needing to be in the same hospital right now. Tom, was just plain and simple, an emotional wreck. Paul sees a scribbled note on the bench next to him: it read,
Got a chance to sit with Ike while you guys were asleep, let me know when you wake up.
Love,
Bill
Paul looks into the room on the other side of the glass. He could see Ike in the bed and Bill holding his lover's hand, sitting in a chair that looked even less comfortable than the couch that they had slept on. Paul looks at his watch and remembers the telephone conversation with Doreen last night, and that he needed to be in her room in an hour. Tom started waking up. He looked into the other room to see Ike on the bed and Bill next to him in the chair.
"Any change?" Tom stands up to look through the glass as he is wrenched with back pain from his odd sleeping position.
"Bill left this note after we fell asleep," Paul says as he stands, walks over to where his lover is, in front of the glass and hands it to Tom. "I promised Doreen that I would at least be with her to hear her `confession'. Do you want to come with me or stay here?"
Tom looked toward his father and Bill in the next room, turned to Paul and suggested, "Let's ask Bill if he wants to get something to eat; we can talk then," Tom looks over to Paul with a squeeze of his hand on Paul's shoulder, "Okay?"
Paul looked into Tom's worried, tired, but loving eyes, filled with anticipation of any news, good or bad, of his father's condition. "Sure my love, what ever you want." Paul taps on the glass of the mirror as Bill stands and goes over to the wall under the mirror and picks up the phone receiver.
"Morning guys," Bills voice comes over the built in speakers, a voice filled with pain and anxiety over his lover's illness.
"We were going to get something to eat." Tom says as he holds Tom from the side, "Wanna join us? I'm sure you could use some coffee at the least, if not something more solid." Tom's voice, too, was filled with the same fear and anxiety that had been there earlier.
"No thanks guys. Don't want to leave Ike in case he should wake up." Bill says, as he turns again and looks at Ike in the bed. "I could use a cup of coffee though. Could you bring me one?
"No problem Bill," Tom says, "anything else?"
"Yes," Bill replies still looking at Ike, "my love to wake up." he hangs up the phone as he walks back to the chair he fell asleep in, sits and holds Ike's hand.
The two leave the observation room and head for the cafeteria, stopping only to check which room Doreen is in, and then on to get something to eat. Walking down the hall, hand in hand, they pass other people, some in wheel chairs and some in walkers, some giving rude, condescending looks of disgust, others totally oblivious that two men are holding hands and walking down the hall together. Entering the cafeteria, they order some unidentifiable sandwich, `the special of the day', three cups of coffee, one to go, and find a table off of the main stream of cafeteria patrons to sit at, eat and discuss what has been going on, and what needs to be done. Tom looks over at Paul. He looks like he has aged 10 years in the last ten hours.
"Do you want to go with me to hear this `confession' of Doreen's at eleven o'clock?" Paul looks over to Tom as he stares off into space, holding his coffee cup like he was just about to take a sip.
"I suppose..." Tom says, "but I'll be damned if I'm gonna put up with anymore crap from that Bitch about me being there!"
"Hey sweetie," Paul says while reaching over the table to Paul and squeezing his hand, "you were invited too, remember?" Paul tries to be as understanding as he can about Tom's predicament and current state of mind.
"You're right," Tom sighs, "I'm just worried about..." as Tom's voice drifts off to nothingness, for there was no reason to continue that sentence, Paul already knew what was on Tom's mind. Looking up, Tom has a look of determination, and abruptly states, "I want to be the donor!" Paul wasn't surprised by this statement; he expected it, after all Tom had gone through with the car accident, and losing his family years ago, there was nothing that he wouldn't do to try and stop losing his newly found father.
They sat at the table drinking their coffee, looking at each other, trying to find the unspoken words that lovers use to give each other comfort. When suddenly, over the roar of the cafeteria crowd came an announcement on the hospital P.A., "Dr. Marshall to room 318, I.C.U. Stat! Dr. Marshall to room 318, I.C.U. Stat!" The two looked at each other and bolted from the table. The call was for Ike's room!!!
Sitting in her room, Dor is seized with anxiety about the impending visit with Tom, and hopefully Paul. "Will I be able to go through with telling them the truth," she asks herself, "and if this really is Carlos's baby, what will I do with it? I can't abort it, and I certainly don't want it either, but who is going to want to raise a half-breed bastard child?" She takes great care standing up and walks over to the window that over looks the parking lot. "Oh my God, Tom is here! That's his car! Got to think fast; what am I going to tell him? What can I tell him so he won't hate me even more?" Then she stops, turns to the door, and says, "There is only one thing I can do to make him hate me even more than he does right now: that is tell him another lie." Carefully she gets herself back into bed and waits for the knock on the door, which she is sure will come very soon.
Running down the hall to I.C.U., Tom and Paul almost overturn a cart and a couple of very slow walking `pedestrians' as they tear through the hospital. Paul felt like screaming out, "If you don't like the way I am running, then walk on the street!" But he knew better and restrained himself, saving it for a private joke at a better time. Reaching the I.C.U., they spot Bill outside the room, leaning on one hand up against the wall and holding his face with the other hand. Paul and Tom stopped running. Tom very carefully, quietly walked over to Bill and touched him on the shoulder.
Bill looked up and smiled, "OH MY GOD!!!" he breathed. "He's AWAKE!!!" he slumps to the floor and repeats, "THANK YOU! thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!" as he collapses into sobs of joy.