Inadequate Men
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Chapter 10 -- Tom Kha Gai
After napping for less than an hour, both Jared and Tom began to stir awake. They were amazed how early it still was -- only a few minutes after 8 o'clock. Jared let Tom snooze for a few minutes in the dark while he jumped into the shower for a quick rinse. As the warm water washed over his body, he realized how free and comfortable he felt in his own skin. And he thought back over the fun that he and Tom had just had. Not bad for a Tuesday night!
When he was done, he dried off quickly and wrapped himself in a big towel -- one of four, a housewarming gift from his parents when he had purchased his home. He thought at the time that it was the perfect gift for your gay son, just not this particular gay son. That other gay son you might have: the one with a partner, or even a husband, who you invited over to celebrate with on Thanksgiving and Christmas. The life that Jared had begun to believe he would never have.
Jared entered the dark room. Seeing that Tom had dozed off again, he kneeled on the bed and lowered his lips onto Tom's cheek, planting a kiss there. "Hey," Tom yawned, "You're getting me wet. Again!"
"Sorry about that," said Jared, pulling away.
"No, no, come here," coaxed Tom, reaching for Jared. "You smell good."
"How did I smell before?" Jared provoked.
"Mmmmm even better," Tom told him. "Next time we work out at the gym together, let's not shower, OK."
"But if we hadn't showered together, we might never have met."
"True that," said Tom, stretching and lifting himself. "Would it be OK if I rinse off?"
"Of course," Jared told him, "And from now on, you don't have to ask."
"Thank you," said Tom, leaning back to give Jared one long parting kiss before showering.
Coming out of the shower, Tom debated for a moment about whether to put on his underwear -- which he had worn all day and then dripped cum into -- back onto his clean body. Jared offered him a pair of clean briefs, but they were a little too small. Besides that, Tom told Jared, he'd quit wearing briefs in his teens because they sometimes gave him too much stimulation, and once made him actually cum in his pants while in school.
"I definitely want to hear more about that sometime," Jared told him.
After a little deliberation, Tom decided to "dare to go commando."
They agreed on Thai food, and once at the restaurant had a few minutes to wait before their table would be ready. The two men settled together onto a cushioned bench in the restaurant's alcove not too close to the door.
"Is this like our first actual date?" asked Tom. "You know, datey date, where we try to impress each other with our advanced degrees and how many countries we've been to on vacation?"
"Yeah," added Jared, "And then figure out if the other guy is eligible enough to consider introducing to friends and family, or just hot enough to play with on the side."
"Wow," Tom said, "Guilty as charged." He looked a little stung.
"Hey," said Jared, "I really didn't mean that the way it came out."
"No, it isn't that," Tom said reassuringly, "I mean, I just realized now that I've been kind of an asshole to more guys over the years than I'd like to admit."
"Yeah," Jared admitted, "Me too. Maybe gay marriage wasn't such a good idea after all. I mean, as an attorney, I get it -- equal rights, of course, it's only fair. It's just hard not to buy into all the bullshit that goes along with marriage."
"OMG, that's so true," Tom said, "Lately, my mom has been asking me if there's anyone special I might want to bring home for the holidays. You know, it's sweet and all, and I'm not complaining..." he smiled ironically, "I mean, I'm not complaining too much. It just kind of feels like, 'Still no ring on that finger... Why hasn't some man caught you yet... You're not getting any younger, dear...' You know, Mom, I know you always wanted a girl, but that's not the situation. Do you ever get that from your parents?"
"Not really," said Jared, "I mean, I know they love me, and I'm out to them and all. I think they're still a little deer-in-the-headlights about it, though. My mom just turned 70 last year, and my dad is 74. You know, they're real Post-War Boomers." He stopped a second, then asked, "Is it still OK to say Boomer?"
"Yeah," Tom laughed, "It's OK to say Boomer, it's just not OK to say OK Boomer."
The hostess showed them to their table, and they ordered a large bottle of Singha beer to split between them. They studied the menu together and found that Tom loved food that was tongue-scaldingly spicy, while Jared was a self-admitted wuss in that department.
"In that case, this just isn't gonna work out," said Tom, throwing down his menu and preparing to leave. "I mean, you're a really nice guy, and the sex is hot, but..."
"Got it," Jared agreed, "No spicy food, non-starter. Anything else?"
"Yeah," Tom added, "As long as we're getting it all out on the table -- your pillows are busted, dude. When's the last time you bought new ones?"
Jared looked genuinely perplexed. "Are you supposed to buy pillows? I thought they just... appeared.... somehow...."
Tom nodded and bit his lip. "OK, dude, just tell me straight. How long have you had those pillows?"
"Since..." Jared said sheepishly, "Always... College... Childhood... A previous life in Ancient Egypt..." He stopped, and waited for Tom to say something. When he didn't, Jared added, "So, you're essentially telling me that people can buy pillows?"
Over an appetizer of grilled chicken on little skewers, Tom managed to pry out of Jared that three or four times a year, his mom would visit. Concurrent with those visits, it seemed, magic elves also helped out by making homey gifts appear all around the house. Wine glasses, lamps, vases filled with flowers, magnetic soap and shampoo containers that stuck to the shower wall, and an electric blanket that Jared had still never removed from its clear plastic wrapping -- all had magically appeared at various times since Jared had moved in.
Still hungry, they decided to split a bowl of tom kha gai, a Thai soup that Tom clarified was not named after him.
By the time their main course had arrived, both men were well into their second beers, and Tom had received permission from Jared to get rid of his "dirtypillows" -- a reference to the movie Carrie, which both had seen as teenagers. They filled their plates with rice, pad Thai, and a beef and eggplant dish that, to the two still-hungry men, looked even better in real life than it had on the menu.
Jared piled his plate especially high and chowed down with reckless abandon, inspiring Tom to ask quietly, "So I guess sex is a good appetizer then."
Jared told him, "Not usually. Usually, on a date, I'm so nervous about everything that I'm not even hungry."
Tom said, "Yeah, me too. But usually, when you're on a date, the restaurant comes before the bedroom, right?"
Jared said, "True. God, I used to get so keyed up over what was going to happen after dinner that I couldn't even have a good time."
Used to. These words that Jared had chosen weren't lost on Tom. While they'd only known each other for a few days, it seemed like much longer. Maybe Tom was just feeling insecure, but he suspected that while Jared liked him, he wasn't quite as sure about his feelings for Tom as Tom was for Jared. On two separate occasions, both in his early 20s, Tom had packed up his stuff in a suitcase and moved in with boyfriends within a few weeks of meeting them. And both times, "too much too soon" hadn't been a good strategy.
So hearing Tom say that he used to get keyed up on a date felt like a subtle confirmation that something might be different this time. Even so, not wanting to make his classic mistake a third time, he just said, "Me too." And then added, "I'm glad we can talk about it like this."
Jared said, smiling, "Me three, Pal." Even saying those words gave him a little thrill, and he could see that they had the same effect on Tom.
"That's right, Buddy," Tom said, moving his head closer to Jared so he could speak down a little, "How's my little bud doing now?"
Jared could feel his penis stirring in his pants as Tom spoke, and boy did it feel good. Most of the time when he was out with a guy on a date, he felt so nervous about what was coming -- or, maybe, not coming -- that his penis felt small, almost non-existent, in his pants. Feeling it stir to life and start to stiffen with just a few words from Tom felt especially good. "Damn, Pal, you're giving me a boner in my pants."
"Yeah?" Tom asked. And without a word, he reached his right hand under the corner of the table, beneath the red tablecloth, and found Jared's left leg. He held his hand there for a second and, finding no opposition from Jared, followed it up his thigh and reached into Jared's lap. Sure enough, his small penis was erect and pointing in Tom's direction. "So, you're a lefty, huh?"
"Uh-huh," said Jared, looking distracted.
"Is my boy Jared feeling good?"
"Yeah," Jared said, "Really good. Really comfortable with you, Tom."
Just hearing that made Tom so happy. He smiled at Jared, then furtively looked around the room to make sure that nobody in the restaurant was looking. Fortunately, their table was sequestered off by a pair of tall shoji screens flanked by big potted plants and a coatrack where both of their coats were hanging, all of which blocked the view reasonably well. Even so, there was still a risk of being seen, and Tom suddenly experienced a visceral delight at the possibility of being caught. In response, his penis stiffened in his pants.
Jared asked, "What about my Pal Tom? Is he a lefty or a righty?" Without waiting for an answer, he reached over and felt his way to Tom's lap, where he found Tom's thinner erection stretching out front of his pants. "Wow," he said, rubbing Tom's penis along its length. "Feels like the man is ready again."
With no underwear, just the thin khaki material between Jared's hand and Tom's penis, Tom visibly shuddered at the intense feeling he was having. "Yeah," he moaned, then added, "I just hope nobody sees what we're doing."
Taking Tom's words at face value, Jared started to pull his hand away. But then he took a chance and continued rubbing Tom's penis, saying, "Yeah, we could get caught. I better stop."
Tom breathed more heavily a few times as Jared continued to rub him through his pants. He said, "If somebody saw us, we might get in trouble." He added, "That would be really embarrassing."
"Yeah," Jared goaded, "Imagine if the waiter saw that I was rubbing your dick in your pants and giving you an erection like that. He might tell everyone in the restaurant."
"I know," Tom agreed, "Then everyone would be looking at me."
"True," said Jared, "What would they be able to see?"
Tom answered, "They'd be able to see your hand on my pants, touching my dick like this. And with no underwear on, I can't hide my erection, so they'd know I like it. And if..."
"If what, Pal?" Jared asked.
"This is so embarrassing," Tom said.
"It's OK, Pal."
Tom was breathing very deeply now, "Jared, if I can't hold it, it's gonna make a stain right in the front of my pants. And then everyone in the restaurant will know I..." he spoke down and moved his mouth closer to Jared's ear, "...had a premature ejaculation in my pants."
"Yeah," Jared said, "That'd be bad, Pal. You shouldn't do that."
"I know," Tom said desperately, "But I might not be able to hold it."
"You getting close?" Jared asked.
"I'm starting to," Tom told him. "Usually when it's still in my pants, I can hold it. But if you keep rubbing the whole length of my penis like you were just doing, I might not be able to keep holding it in."
"You mean if I rub it like this?" Jared asked, stroking up and down on Tom's erection, all the way from the tip of his small head down his thin, stiff 4-inch shaft to where it met his balls.
"Yessss..." Tom said, breathing even more heavily, "If you keep doing that much longer, I don't think I'll be able to hold it."
"That would be bad," Jared said, continuing to rub Tom in exactly that way.
"I know. I'm trying..." Tom said.
"Trying what, Pal," asked Jared, still rubbing Tom discreetly under the table in a steady rhythm, with no sign of letting up.
"I'm trying to hold it, but I don't know how much longer I can do it." Tom added, "I'm really afraid that someone might see me."
Jared looked across the restaurant and noticed a handsome 40-something guy with what looked to be his college-aged son on the other side of the restaurant. They looked to be completely engaged in their conversation and unaware of what Jared was doing to Tom. Even so, Jared said, "I think they might have noticed us."
Tom went along, "Oh no, I shouldn't be doing this."
Jared said, "Yeah, Pal, you can't let yourself squirt in your pants in front of those guys."
"I know," said Tom, sounding more desperate than ever, "But I'm so close.... I don't know how long... I'm trying so hard..."
"Yeah, Pal, I think they can see what we're doing under the table."
"Oh no," said Tom, "I don't want anybody to see me."
"Yeah, especially if you have a premature ejaculation in your pants," added Jared.
"I'm so close," Tom said. "I can't..."
"You need to hold it, Tom," Jared goaded, still rubbing Tom's penis, which had fully stiffened and was straining against the front of his pants. "I think they can see you."
"I'm trying..."
"Come on, Pal, keep holding it..."
"I'm trying so hard..." Then all at once, Tom said, "Oh no, I can't hold it, I can't hold it. Unnnnhhhhh..." Tom tried to keep his upper body straight as it happened, but he spasmodically folded over the table as the wave of pleasure hit him. He could feel Jared still rubbing his erection from under the table as he involuntarily pumped out squirt after squirt of cum into his pants.
Jared could feel the wetness spread across his hand as Tom unloaded. It seemed like a lot more jizz than Tom usually produced, that was sure. As the spasms started to subside, both men looked around the room. Despite the personal earthquake that they had shared, the restaurant was much the same, and it looked like nobody had particularly noticed them.
Suddenly, the college kid at the table across from them stood up and walked toward them. He was a handsome guy for sure, tall with dark hair and big brown eyes, and Jared thought that he looked like Tom must have when he'd been that age. The boy headed straight for their table, smiling as he passed, and for a moment both Jared and Tom stopped breathing. Then he walked right past their table and into the bathroom that was off in a hallway behind them.
"So, you up for dessert?" asked Jared.
Still panting like he'd just run a couple of miles, Tom just shot him one of those looks.
To be continued...
Thanks for reading! I've received a surprising number of responses from readers who can relate to Jared and Tom -- either as a guy with a small penis, a guy who cums quickly, or a guy who is slow to get hard. Just know that you're not alone, my friend. And if you've thought about writing, please do: judestjude2357@gmail.com. I promise to do my best to answer, especially if you're feeling alone with no one to talk to about this stuff. Thanks again, TJ