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It does contain consensual sex between young men. You've found this site like the rest of us so the assumption is that material of this nature does not offend you. If it does, or it is illegal for you to view this content for whatever the reason, just keep on passing by.
Sorry for the delay in this chapter guys...new job, homelife, Stanley Cup playoffs and more...Please let me know what you think or just shoot me a line @ phantomscorpio77@gmail.com.
).:.(<<
In This Cruel World
From earlier
"Dunc, I asked Katy to be my girlfriend...Well, Kimi did it for me... and she said yes," I tell him.
He reacts exactly as I knew he would. I see a twinge of hurt and then he flashes his thousand watt smile, "Way to go Benji!"
Needing to say something I add, "We're still good. What I promised back on my birthday wasn't a lie."
He drops his boxers and tosses them at me, "Good. I might just need some consoling now that my best friends are dating."
"Dude, you hooked up with Yvonne first," I point out, copping a look at his junk as he stuffs it in his black and lime-green Speedo.
He snaps my ass with his towel as I try to step into my navy and powder blue Speedo. To all the guys laughter he says, "Anyone hear the news about Mr. Roseycheeks here? Hartkainen is officially off the market, and this time she's even real!"
).:.(<<
Benji's filled you in on a lot of our fine points. But for starters he missed a poignant detail. After he ambushed me with this information in the hallways on the way to the school pool and vowed to keep his birthday promise of sex with me he missed a few things. I remember it more like this:
"Dunc, I asked Katy to be my girlfriend...Well, Kimi did it for me... and she said yes," Benji sheepishly tells me.
I am devastated. Totally floored. I fake the best smile I can manage, "Way to go Benji!"
He buys my congratulations. Ups, here it comes; the consolation, "We're still good. What I promised back on my birthday wasn't a lie."
It's been bothering me for a couple weeks. Two, three times a week up to daily for almost the last two weeks we have fucked around. I know he says no ass play on his part and that he's not into it. He forcefully stops me if I go for the crevice behind his balls so the first rule holds true. But how can he not be into it when he rips my clothes off and holds my boy every chance he gets? He dives in like a lunatic and starts sucking me off with lust. Then a switch flips as soon as he deposits his semen on me or in my mouth and I sometimes have to almost beg him to let me shoot off. Try as I might I never cum first.
Last night he went to the bathroom to clean up and left me hanging. He came back with an apple from his kitchen and wordlessly gave me a disdainful look that told me to stop masturbating and do up my pants. I was almost there too! I was so horny walking home from his house minutes later that I pulled one arm in from the sleeve of my winter coat and slipped my hand down my pants and finished the job as I walked.
That was fun! Daring but fun. My legs got weak and I think I grunted out loud when I finally blasted. I wiped the mess on my hand off on my hoodie. By the time I had my arm back in the sleeve of my coat things down there were not only wet and sticky but getting cold! If I had more than a few blocks to go I'm sure it would have become bothersome, but it actually felt sorta kinky or something. Still, Benji drove me to finish myself off in public on the way home from sex with him!
This is the part of the convo that he missed. I point out, "Benji, when you and I fool around lately it's just you getting your rocks off in my mouth or hand, and a little sympathy sex for me."
He speeds up now that we are near the aquatic centre attached to the school. By the time I catch up with him and put my hand on his shoulder he's got a response ready, "Yeah, so? Nothing more, nothing less than my promise. If by sympathy sex you mean letting you paint my tonsils with your jizz then you're right."
I can see this battle's lost. I've been waylaid and stripped of all defenses. All I can do is be happy for the love of my life and show him I am happy for him even though inside it is tearing me up. It stings me that I really am happy for him too. In the change room I pick up the conversation once the kid beside me packs his clothes away and heads to the deck. Benji and I can go like this at times, long pauses between speaking, but still carry on the same conversation. I don't mean to, but in a moment of unchecked anger I whip my boxers at him, "Good. I might just need some consoling now that my best friends are dating."
"Dude, you hooked up with Yvonne first," He says while taking a good hard look at my twig and berries.
As if he's not gay on some level! Wake up and smell my crotch Benji! You want it and anyone looking would have just seen you checking me out. At least I only take mental snap-shots of his two globes clad in his Vancouver Canucks decorated boxers for later right before he peels them off rather than stare at them. Seriously, my eyes take this in from the corners while I appear to be looking in my back pack, but still, now I have a hot jack off image stored away for later. In fact the mental picture is so good that right now I just want everyone to get lost so I can nestle my boner in that valley between his cheeks, right up at the base of his spine as I paint his back white with my love for him.
Instead I cover for him, snapping his ass with my towel while it's still bared for all to see, "Anyone hear the news about Mr. Roseycheeks here? Hartkainen is officially off the market, and this time she's even real!"
Everyone laughs at me. Not like at me, but like I was funny and made them laugh. I guess adding a jerking off motion when I emphasized the girl is real part helped! I suddenly get the sad clown stories. I am so deeply saddened on the inside but I put up an impeccable act to the contrary for his benefit.
...So it was a little more elaborate than Benji knows. I thought I could live with this but damn I sure feel like a used doormat. I knew this would happen long before Benji and Katy started dating, that it was just a matter of time before he realized he's fagging out with me. Benji and her dating is just the nudge I need to get off of the bench and into the game for real.
I would have been inconsolable if not for Adam. Especially since from that day on Katy and I let our friendship slide because Benji in the middle poses a dynamic we don't know how to deal with.
).:.(<<
I classify most guys my age into two categories, fuckable or ugly. Well Adam is not ugly. He's is a bit more of a pretty boy than most guys our age, maybe a little more delicate looking. He's not drop dead gorgeous but he is in great shape if not on the thin side. He packs enough meat down low to pique my interest and his damn smile is contagious. I know I smile a lot, but this kid always has a smile on his face, I think that's why even the jocks have a hard time picking on him; he's just too nice and friendly to give a hard time to and if they know him they know he has a heart of gold. Looking at him I realize that rather than ever giving him a hard time I'd instead like to spend some time hard with him.
After McDonalds that day Adam and I walk home together. Adam is quite forward, "Duncan McKerracher, take no offense please if I am wrong, but were you checking me out in the change room?"
"No offence taken, and please take no offence if I was checking you out. Your body is far from offensive," I answer, hoping he thinks I'm clever.
He does a double take at me, "So what you are saying is?"
I thought it would be hard to say but it just flows as we make eye contact, "That I'd like to maybe get to know you better Adam. Oh, and the tool between your legs makes mine hard."
"Kinda what I thought, just checking. Cool! I'd like to get to know you better too Duncan," he says and then pauses, "Just one question though, what about Yvonne?"
"Well she doesn't look as good in a Speedo as you do," I smart ass back.
"No, I'm being serious. Before I invite you up to my place and try to maybe kiss you I'd like to know if you're going to go screaming to everyone about me hitting on you and make out with her in front of me."
"We don't make out. She's actually told me she's happy I'm not looking for sex. We're both happy just holding hands and hugging."
"So does she know?"
"Dunno. Maybe, maybe not. I sorta think it won't be a shock to her at the very least."
"And if we make out you are not going to go getting all weird that you did something with a boy?"
"Adam, you won't be my first," I say and pull him towards me, "I won't say who else, but I'm totally fine with liking boys."
To emphasize my sincerity I plant a great kiss on his lips. On a side street in the shadow of our condo complex he tries to turn the kiss into more. It lasts a lot longer than a simple peck and he wants to keep it going, I feel his tongue on my lips. I pull away and start walking again.
Catching up with me Adam only says, "Wow!"
I smile at his smile, "Yeah! it's easy to kiss a good kisser, and you're damn easy to kiss."
"Right back atcha!"
).:.(<<
Between school, hockey, swimming, the band, family, friends and a girlfriend I am hardly able to fit Adam in to my schedule until school ends for the summer and Junior Olympic Squad swimming and waterpolo kick in. Bless the recent dawn of the internet age and instant messaging; through it Adam is also at the yearend party with a group of girls, Heather, Sara, and Nadine. He keeps shooting me glances while I am holding Yvonne. Feeling bad I lead Yvonne over to his group and we all get to talking. Adam suggests a walk to Stanley Park. No one's are up for it, but I decide to go for a walk with him as no one else wants to.
Tonight is the night I can bookmark forever as the night I felt normal with being gay. Out in the open, away from our friends we end up in the rose gardens and sit on a park bench holding each other. His head is against my chest when a twenty something couple sits down on a bench near us. I make eye contact with both the guy and the girl and we don't phase them at all. They don't avoid eye contact, they don't stare. Two teenage boys holding each other is nothing to them as they likewise snuggle.
I'm so happy in the moment I want to explode, but sad because I wish so badly that it were Benji I am holding in public. Alas I have to settle for Adam and his passion fruit scented shampoo. Adam and I end up leaving the rose gardens holding each other's hand. As we walk towards our homes I don't know if this makes us boyfriends or what. In the past few months we've kissed, groped each other, and talked about our orientation. And we've gotten as far as oral a few times. Not as often as Benji and I fool around, but there's more substance in return.
When we get inside the promenade Adam invites me up to his place. It's late and I know my mom will still be up waiting for me so I try to decline. He convinces me so we head up my tower first to tell my mom that I'd like to stay over at his place for the night. When we get to his condo his dad's in bed and his mom is asleep on the couch. Adam sneaks me into his room before going back out and waking his mom.
With the coast clear Adam snaps on a reading lamp and then kisses me. Benji will kiss me if I really persist, but Adam willingly makes out with me. I breathe him in, his hair smells like fruit, his breath of freshmint. After a great tongue tussle we come up for air and stare into each other's eyes. His hair is longer than standard for swimming season and gives me something to run my fingers through so I idly start playing with it.
Adam smiles at me. He wants to say something, but I guess I am going to have to play the game and pull it out of him. I lift his shirt over his head and pinch one of his nipples between my lips and play with it with my tongue. Finally playing to him I simply ask, "What?"
He asks, "Do you want to do it?"
"What, like sex," I ask.
"Uh, yeah. Like sex. I take it that's a no," he says as he pulls back from me.
I don't quite know how to break it gently to him, "Gonna hafta say no Adam. You're cute as fuck, but I'm not quite ready for that yet."
I can't believe his reaction, he actually whines, "You sure you don't want to try?"
"C'mon Adam," I say, pulling further away from him in return.
He tries again, "Puh weese?"
He's being cute, very cute, and both of my heads are saying yes. But my heart is saying no, I'm holding out for Benji. What's really stopping me at the moment is that I'm nervous to the point of being afraid of having sex for the first time. My heart is pounding in my chest.
"Adam, knock it off. Can't we just cuddle and sleep together? Baby steps? We've hardly gotten to that stage yet," I try to gently say.
Adam seems rejected, but what can I do? He smiles at me and nods. After an awkward silence he asks, "Gotcha. Are you cool with fooling around some still?"
To answer his question I undo the button of his shorts. He purrs as I unzip his pants. He's game for my unknown intentions, lifting his hips so that I may pull down his shorts. I take in his fit body, sitting in his plaid boxers before I dive in and bury my face in the welcoming curves between his legs and engulf his protruding boner into my warm mouth.
I set the pace good and slow with Adam. With Benji it's becoming something more visceral; once we get started it's like a flash-fire, intensely hot and it's over incredibly quick. Adam's hand is resting on the back of my head, sending tingles up and down my spine as he absently plays with my hair. I slip a hand up the leg of his crisp boxers and fondle his boys. The contact startles him and he starts to squirm. I pull off, intending to lean him back in a more relaxed position but he grabs for my shorts instead, having no trouble figuring out my canvas belt. He stands me up so that they can drop from my hips. With lust in his eyes he presses his erection into mine.
As we grind together I can't help but focus on the crinkly material of his boxers. I cup his balls through them and when he presses into me again I massage the tight cheeks of his fine ass. Adam starts to give me a hand job but I was really into suckling on his lollipop a couple moments ago so I firmly guide him to lie back down on the unmade tangle of sheets on his bed and take him all the way in again. My member is lose and reaching for the sky in Adam's hand.
Adam pulls me down onto his bed so that I am straddled over him. His favourite position is to 69 on his back with my legs under his shoulders and his head resting on my calves. He loves it when I take over for him and thrust into his mouth rather than sucking me off. Skull fucking I think he called it. Halting my attention on his penis I comply and all too soon I pull out and spray his chest and dribble on his neck.
Today I feel a little adventurous. I've thought about how hot it would be for a while so I decide fuck it, I'm going for it. I wiggle forward a little and sit down on his neck and chest, grinding my butt along him. My boxers wipe up my mess and I feel a wet spot right against my hole. Yup, I definitely like it, the sensation courses through my body and it feels great. Next time he shoots I want it to be on me there. Not in me, but on me.
Keeping up with my walk on the wild side, at least for me, I get off of Adam and tell him, "Turn over."
"I thought you said no," He questions.
"I did say no, and we're not doing that so don't worry about a condom. Just lose these, lie down, and relax," I say, tugging at his boxers.
My boy is hairless. I'm not sure if it's natural or if it's from shaving for swimming but the only hair he has is a tidy bush above his penis. I don't even have to spread the mounds of his butt apart as I already have full access to his backdoor. Benji has more flesh cheeks, but I never get to part them.
"Tell me if you like this," I ask just before diving in with my tongue.
"Fuuuuh uuuck," He curses, but in a good way. Clearly he likes it. As I work over his button he lets out little comments like yeah, eat that hole' and oh, so good'. Just little comments to encourage me. If he was squirming minutes ago I think he is now writhing in ecstasy. The wetness of my own mess on my boxers against my rear entry is giving me extra energy too.
His hips keep rising until he is partly kneeling and his right hand is working over his meat. I reach around with my left hand and entwine my fingers with his. It amazes me but with my tongue I can feel his building orgasm and without relying on his gasps and sighs I can sense the instant he's ready to fire his cannon.
After we're done he tries to cover up the mess on his bedsheet with a bath towel that was flung over the back of a chair. Damn! What a mess he made of the bed, it splattered all the way up to his pillow and there are a couple real good pools of Adam seed about a foot apart from each other that he's covering up!
I ditch my boxers but he pulls a pair from his armoire for me, "My parents know, but they are not finding me naked with another boy in my bed."
He steps into pajama pants and back into bed. We pull the sheets up and snuggle our way off to sleep. This is my first time staying over with Adam.
In the morning I keep his boxers and leave mine. He calls me on it a few days later, telling me that fruit of the loom do not make up for his A&F boxers. As if? Fruit of the loom? I wear the good stuff now from the Gap baby! Still, I buy him a pair from American Eagle's that have the same cool, crisp feel to them. Pink with white eagles all over them. I think they are sexy on him and he agrees, calling them his lucky drawers. Thankfully no one knows that I'm the one that gave them to him!
).:.(<<
In the midst of summer Benji and I get nabbed for trespassing in the vineyards. At least I'm not kneeling down and about to give Benji a blowjob or anything when we get nabbed. In the fallout of the trouble at his cottage my mom gets Benji and I junior maintenance jobs with her Parks and Recreation division here in the city.
Adam spends a ton of time up in Whistler hanging out with the kids of the family that own a resort there. I think there are two boys and a girl in and around our age, but to listen to him there is only one boy and Adam wants to jump his bones. What's worse is that the guy, Ryan or Rye or something, is openly gay too.
).:.(<<
When school resumes in the fall things are different in my life. As high school has a way of doing it separates some people and forces others together. Add to that the fact that against our will we are constantly learning, growing and maturing and something has to give. For me it is a division in my friends. I find myself spending a lot more time with Cameron, Etienne, and Richard. Kimi tends to hang with my group of friends more than with Benji, Katy, Ian and Shawna. Now that we are Juniors my group may be more of the geeky group of the two where Benji's group is in all the popular-kid circles. Yvonne doesn't dislike either group but often hangs out with Adam and his girlfriends Heather, Nadine and Richard's sister Sara. At least for now our groups often overlap so I don't feel like I've lost anyone.
Also in the fall our band has started to hit some bumps in the road. Ryan and Zach have a sideband on the go with kids from their school, and Jase being there is about a fifty/fifty shot because lately he isn't happy with them hogging the glory when we all get together. Jase and I take to playing guitar in the student union or the halls at school during lunch. Even though I'm a lefty I play a right handed acoustic guitar because it's all there is.
Jase. Jase to this day is a mystery to me. He does his own thing, doesn't seem to have a lot of friends nor want any. And he's happy that way. Not that I am going to complain, I like playing with him and we both sing and it's just simple and uncomplicated. No need to muff that up.
On the first day of autumn while we are lounging after school he just comes out with it, "How bad do you have it for Ben's dick?"
"What," I nearly scream, my voice is so shrill.
"It's cool Bitch, it's cool. I don't care, but I don't think he does either. You look at him like a puppy does to a kid with an ice cream cone or something, and he just looks through you. Get yourself a boyfriend that cares."
"It's not so simple Jase. I already have a girlfriend and a boyfriend. Only I don't love either and Benji's different when it's just us. And I'm not comfortable with people knowing. Maybe it's starting to be a bit obvious, and I'm actually happy that I like boys, but I just don't care for the whole world to know yet. Are you going to make it front page news?"
"Yeah, you know me Duncan. I only roll with the cool kids. Selling you out is right up there on my list with actually giving a fuck what they think of me."
I ask, "Um, are you too?"
"Gay? Nope," he says and that's all the thought he gives it before getting into what is to him is a more important topic, "Hey, did you know that song that goes `Sittin on a pebble by the river playin guitar, wonderin if we're really ever gonna get that far' isn't John Lennon? It's his son Julian. I always thought it was John."
).:.(<<
Benji always seems to be with Katy nowadays and half the time I go over to his house I end up chilling with Kimi instead. So before I head over I check if he's there first now. I like Kimi and all, but I love Benji. I don't bother with Benji's cell phone, I call the house because if he's not home then I can visit with my fake girlfriend instead.
I come in on Yvonne listening to a German band one day when I get home from soccer practice. We crash at my house all the time because she shares a room with Katy and we both prefer to have it just us. More laid back, more relaxing. So a lot of times I give her my key to let herself in and wait for me.
Standing just outside my room I can make out a lot of the words. German and Finnish are not the same, but I can get the general meaning of the song playing. And the sound, what a sound! It's like metal with techno and industrial and this deep, deep bass rumbling voice!
Walking into my room I offer a greeting to Yvonne completely in German. She's blown away that I pulled that together from the song and used it almost properly. We spend the evening listening to the CD and she explains the many words that I could only guess at. By the end of the night I can throw together a few sentences. By the end of the week I can carry on a very basic conversation.
This is around Canadian Thanksgiving, or near the middle of October. I just want to get things sorted out in my head and avoid everyone for a bit. Maybe withdraw like Jase and say to hell with everyone else. Only I can't. I feel a compulsion to be social. I feel safest with Yvonne. Her being a fake girlfriend aside she really is the person I feel most comfortable with lately and I am able to let down my guard and relax with her. The fact that she never forces physical contact and would rather just chill is such a boon to me! Outside of school I start dedicating the lion's share of my free time with her.
[to be continued]