This story is a complete work of fiction. Names, characters and incidents are a product of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to real people or events is completely coincidental. This story may contain descriptions of sexual interactions. If you are uncomfortable reading such material or are not permitted to do so legally, please leave this page now.
This story is the property of the author matthews2464@yahoo.com. All comments are welcome.
Immortal Love
Chapter 4
Over the next couple of days, Chris became strong enough to go home. He had been tested so much that he was glad to be leaving the hospital soon. All the test results came back negative, showing no brain damage from his untimely injuries. Yet, he still needed time to heal, but for the most part(,) he was find.
In spite of his speedy recovery, Chris had noticed some changes in Jay though. Even if he never left his side, Chris felt this emptiness or void being developed between them. At first it was little things, like, not holding his hand as much until it became apparent. Jay stop holding them altogether. Then, Jay wouldn't make eye contact with him.
The worst part was when Jay would stop talking to him, unless Chris spoke to him first. This got even worse in the last couple of days. It was as if they were complete total stranger and never spoken at all. Chris started to think he had done something wrong or maybe he offended Jay in some way. He was certain that Jay liked him. At least, that's what Chris thought. But maybe he was just being nice because he was hurt.
Maybe he just didn't like him at all.
What was he thinking? Why would someone, like Jay, like a boring nothing guy like him. Jay was obviously a way cooler guy than Chris. He probably had lots of friends and stuff. After all, he was a bodyguard. Chris was just a kid with problems. What would anyone see in him anyway?
On the day Chris was ready to leave the hospital, Jay left him with Ann. She came to prepare Chris for his departure and to drive him home safely. So that Jay had time to prepare for Chris' arrival and his protection at home.
Jay had set it up that he would be staying with the Johnson house while Ann and the rest of the team stayed at the hotel. Also he had the team members scheduled 24/7 to make rounds surrounding the Johnson house and neighborhood, to make sure that they would see anyone who tried to get close to Chris. The team and Jay felt it was safer to have Ann bring Chris home so that no one would suspected Chris was on his way home.
Meanwhile, Ann helped Chris get his things together, set him into the wheelchair, and headed towards the back of the hospital exit. She then helped him into her car, got in herself and pulled out of the hospital's back parking lot. She finally broke the silent.
"You OK Chris?" She asked. "You have been really quiet today."
"Ya'..." Chris said unenthusiastically, "I guess so."
"Aren't you happy to be going home?" She pursued further.
"Ya," he said, "it'll be nice to be back in my own bed ... in my own room"
"So what's the matter?" She pried as she was trying fo figure out what was bothering him.
"Oh nothing," He sighed but trying to hide his frustration, "I'm just trying to figure out what I did to piss off Jay."
"What do you mean?"
"When I first met him he seemed," Chris paused and then out of frustration blurted, "I don't know, different towards me."
"And now what ..." she felt her way with her words and then realized, "he's mean to you?"
"No not really. He just, doesn't talk to me anymore and ..."
Ann interrupted him "... and he stopped holding your hand like he had been doing from the beginning, right?" Ann softened her nature to a caring voice to invite more openness in their conversation.
"Well ..." then Chris lowered his head and whispered. "Yes, he has" and tried to hide his tears.
Ann could hear the hurt in his voice. She had thought that Jay would be the one that needed looking after, but now she is wrong. She would have to look after both of them. Ann knew Chris was right about Jay. He has been acting strange on this case. She knew it had to do with Chris. How he resembled so much like Ben, Jay former lover, but it had to be more than just that, though. She had to say something to comfort Chris.
"Listen Chris" she started, "Jay really does care about what happens to you. He just seen something in you that he hasn't seen in a long time. Give him some time and I know he will explain it all too you."
"What do you mean?" Chris asked.
"Just be patient with him. He is not like anyone you have ever met before. He will risk his life to save you if needed, as we all will. Chris, you just have to trust me on this." Ann reassured him in her caring tone. "It's not you. And the time will come when he will explain everything to you."
Jay was getting things ready at the Johnson's house. He was setting up the cameras in the common rooms, but not in the bedrooms or bathrooms for possible intruders. As Jay was going about his work, he was thinking about Ben. How much they had loved each other. It has been so long that he felt like this. He was good at locking off his emotions. Now things seemed to changed since meeting Chris.
Jay's thoughts changed to Chris. At first, he had confused his emotions for Chris for those of Ben, his first love. He was mistaken them to be of Chris to his lost love. Then, as the time went by, he started to see the things that made Chris different from Ben.
Chris was outgoing and funny. He wasn't as reserved as Ben had been. Jay found Chris so easy to be with, especially how he liked the feeling he had when being around the boy. He still had to keep his distance, though, because the last time he followed his feelings. He fell in love with Ben. They were so happy together. He had loved Ben so much and when he lost him ... it was like nothing he had ever felt in his life. Lost. Emptied. Lonely.
Jay couldn't go through that again. He had to make sure that the feelings he had developed for Chris were blocked. He couldn't let his emotions get in the way of his job. He knew what he had to do. He was going to continue to keep Chris at a distance. He knew Chris was starting to have feeling for him too. He had to keep that from happening. He didn't want to hurt the boy, so it was better to keep him at arm-length that way he could do his job, and keep from causing the other boy from feeling the pain he felt.
Yup, that's what he was doing. He was protecting Chris. That was his job. Even if he had to protect the boy from his own feelings, he had to keep doing what he was doing, separating himself, to keep the boy safe. That was his job.
As Ann pulled in the driveway, Chris' parents met them outside. She was glad to see that Chris was happy to be home. Even though, he seems a bit confused about Jay, but this was his home where he was safe and back with his parents.
They all went inside the house after a brief greeting. Mrs. Johnson had them all come into the kitchen for some lunch. As they were all walking in, Ann grabbed Jay's arm and pull him aside away from the others.
"Can I talk to you for a minute Jay?" She asked.
"Sure. Mrs. Johnson, we will be walking around the house a bit. We will be back." Jay said.
"Are you sure? You all must be hungry." Mrs. Johnson said.
"Thank you, but we will be fine for the moment." Jay said and walked outside with Ann.
While the two began to walk the house the perimeter of the property, looking for gaps in the security. Ann finally broke the silent and spoke to Jay "What are you doing?"
"Sorry?" Jay confused by Ann's statement.
"What are you doing with Chris?" Ann added a little more sternness this time as to what she trying to imply.
"I'm doing my job Ann. Why what do you think I am doing?" He was clearly frustrated by her attitude.
"You know what I mean Jay. You are pushing the boy away."
"I am protecting him, Ann. That's what I'm supposed to be doing."
"Oh really," Ann looked him straight into his eyes. "Are you sure about that? It seems to me you are protecting yourself."
"What are you talking about?" Jay finally was getting frustrated as to what Ann's point of their conversation was leading to. Ann stopped walking, grabbed his shoulders to look him straight in the eye.
"You are keeping him away. You have feelings for him Jay. I can see it in your eyes. And not just because he looks like Ben. I can see how you like the guy."
"Ann" as Jay lowered his eyes to the ground, and he soften his voice "Ann, I do have feelings for him. But I can't let them out. You know what happened to Ben. I can't go through that again."
"So, instead you are going to spend the rest of your life alone. You are not going to let yourself love another man. Or let them love you?" Ann said started to raise her voice a bit.
"Keep your voice down" Jay scolded her.
"Don't you do that, don't try and change the subject. That boy really cares about you. And he thought you cared about him. Then all of a sudden, you turn your back on him. He is really confused. He thinks he did something wrong to make you angry at him." Ann wasn't holding anything back this time. "So now he have to suffer while you protect YOURSELF not him, right?"
"Ann you know why I can't. You know what it's like to be me. I have seen so many people I care about grow old and die. I can't go through that again," he said.
"You mean you won't go through it again." She snapped back. "Jay, you are not supposed to be alone. Everyone loses someone especially, those who we love the most. No matter what we tend to go on without them, one way or another. We have to have new people to come into our lives. So that we can care about them, and yes, even love."
"But it hurts too much when you lose them" he said.
"Yes, it does." She got glassy eyes while looking at Jay. "It's supposed to hurt. That shows how much we love them. Now Jay, you need to go in there and tell that boy everything about Ben." She pointed her finger to the house without any argument. "He deserves to know why you aren't talking to him. He deserves to know how you feel about him."
At that, she turned away from Jay and walked into the house. He just stood there for a few minutes thinking about what she had said. Yes, she was right and he was wrong. Wrong not tell Chris about his past and about how he really felt. Perhaps, he could have many good years of love with someone like Chris. But he have to be willing to let it happen.
Jay turned and headed towards the house. He have to tell Chris everything, that if he could get it all out. First, he have to tell Chris how he feels about him and then tell him about his past love.