IKEA by Quantum
Every word in the story is true. It happened to me on September 29, 1996 while travelling in Edmonton, Alberta. I have written this story in it's original form, as a letter written to one of my fag, net buddies. His submessages to me, are enclosed in [ ] brackets, while my submessages to him, are enclosed in { } brackets. I had previously written Tod and had given him a brief teaser of my experience at:
IKEA
[Tod wrote: OOOH, IKEA!!! That is definitely a sex story... you've got to tell me everything.. please!!!!]
{Tim wrote: Hey Tod
Now, you asked about IKEA. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.
I'm thinking.
Oh, what the hell, okay. I just love it when you beg.}
I was kind of down as I hadn't gotten lucky the night before and I was as horny as a three-peckered-goat. This had been caused by the fact that, the previous night, I had connected with this one cute guy at The Roost. The guy had a medium frame and was about 5'8", 165 or so, tight body, really nice butt, nice pouch, but very drunk. We had started talking and to hear each other, we had to yell into each other's ear to be heard over the music. I of course naturally, let my hand rest on the back of his neck and let my fingers play there for a bit, then to his earlobes, then down his back to his butt. He seemed to be enjoying himself and returned the attention to a slightly lesser degree. We talked some more, then he said he had to get another drink and he went off to the bar. That was the last I saw of him. Fucking cocktease!
Anywho, late Sunday afternoon, I pulled into the Ikea Furniture Store parking lot and happened to notice this guy, not too far away, getting out of a small 4x4. He was 5' 8", had a slim build, maybe 160 lbs, dark hair with a moustache and of course, the prerequisite cute butt. He went in ahead of me, while I got my dog some more food and water and then let him stretch his legs. I went in and started looking around and I noticed this guy again. Every now and then I found him looking at me, but I didn't acknowledge it. When he wasn't looking at me, I was checking him out. Obviously, by his mannerisms he was gay. I had thought of getting closer and 'accidentally' brushing his ass with my hand, but I couldn't seem to maneuver him into an area that was tight enough for me to pull it off. Then I thought, Oh what the hell, he probably has a lover at home. I sort of lost track of him and just walked around for a while.
I left IKEA, got into my camper and drove north on the Calgary Trail to the City Center. When I got up to speed, I couldn't help but notice some movement on the right wiper-blade. I looked and saw this note and immediately cut across four lanes of traffic to pull into a parking lot. I slammed the shifter into park, opened the door and practically dived for the paper. I read it and couldn't believe my luck.
The note said, "If you're into some hot action with another guy, give me a call. Mike," and then his phone number. I looked around for a pay phone but couldn't see one. Cursing myself for not getting a cell-phone, I jumped into my truck in hot pursuit of a phone booth. I'd find myself driving on one side of the road, only to see a phone on the opposite side, with no possibility of crossing over the traffic. I was starting to get hard, which didn't help. I'm quite large boned with a 45 1/2" chest and a 34" waist. As my pants fit really tight and I was sitting, I didn't have much room left for 'the big guy'. Finally a pay phone!
{By the by Tod, are you still interested?}
I pulled over, jumped out, fumbled for change, then dialed. I prayed for an answer. Then a pickup and I heard "Hello," (there is a God). I explained to him that I'd gotten his note and that I was returning his call. "Well" he said, and then went on to ask me what I thought. I told him that I was very flattered and that for the last ten weeks, I had been touring Canada and bedding as many guys as I could. We made a little small talk, then went on to our preferences. I told him that generally, I was a top, but that it was important for me to see my lovers very satisfied. I told him that I liked just about anything, short of the sick and painful stuff. He told me that he had always been a bottom and that his preferences duplicated my own. He gave me his address and I told him that I'd get there as quick as possible. I wasn't kidding! After I changed into my black 'Snowy River' cowboy hat and full-length black Australian Outback duster, I booted all 22 1/2 feet and 11,500 pounds of my camper back down the Calgary Trail at 60 to 70 MPH. I was lucky that I didn't get snagged with a ticket! I got to his apartment and talked to him again at the intercom and he buzzed me up.
As he opened the door his eyes bugged out, then a huge smile crossed his face. (He had told me on the phone that he has quite a hard-on for cowboys.) I got in, ditched the boots, coat and hat and we went into the living room. He sat down on the couch and I of course, ignored the other chairs and sat down beside him. After talking for over an hour, I let my fingers start to play on his neck. (They seem to have a mind of their own!) His breathing became uneven and then we started caressing each other like a bucket of snakes. I asked him if he'd like to make love with me. All he could say was, "Yes." I put one arm around his back and one arm under his butt and lifted him off of the couch. Again his eyes bugged out and he stammered, "Oh my God. No one has ever picked me up like that before." I answered, "Well I've just done it." I carried him to the bedroom and we slowly undressed each other, kissing and caressing all the while. To get matters going, I went down on him and sucked him into a lather, to which he later reciprocated.
We kissed and caressed each other and then I asked him if he would like me to fuck him. Again, his answer was, "Yes." I slipped on a rubber and fucked him to the point that he'd almost blow his load, then let him cool down a bit. After about two hours and many, many positions, he had blown his load twice, but I as yet hadn't. By that time though, I was really tired, so we just held and caressed each other for at least an hour. Later, I grabbed a shower and we got a bite to eat. We went to sleep in each other's arms. We fucked and sucked, and sucked and fucked repeatedly over the next couple of days blowing our loads repeatedly. On Wednesday, I decided that I should get home and he had to get up early to go to his other part-time job.
After I got home, I was sitting at me computer when a thought occurred to me. I went into one of my programs and created a number of very nice 'pick up cards', printed in colour, on a sheet of business card stock. Needless to say, the cards read, "If you're interested in some hot action with another guy, phone Mike at (etcetera)." I mailed them to him on the following Friday. I phone him a week later. He told me he hadn't stopped laughing since he received the cards.
{Hey Tod, do you ever get to IKEA?}
P.S.
I can just see it now, every fag that's read this story, will be frequenting every furniture store, from coast to coast, looking for action. Ahhh, isn't life grand!