If It Weren't For the Two of Us Chapter 35
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35
July 27
I want a dog.
Spending the weekend with Mike and having Sascha there was phenomenal. I had no idea what I was missing as a kid. The next time I see my parents, I'm going to give them hell for not letting me have a dog.
The work week started well. Mike had said he would be willing to do something social with Scott, so I was eager to tell my coworker we'd be up for it.
Scott invited Mike and me to their place for dinner Thursday night. I had yet to meet his partner. That sounded simple and easy enough. I made that our mid-week get-together, so I had a few nights to really get serious about wrapping up the script. I called both Tariq and Zach to fine tune some last details on what they had experienced. I found it rewarding to include their emotional stories in the play. Both of them were very open, which made the process easier. I really missed them. I knew Tariq better, but even though Zach was Lance's roommate, I felt I was feeling closer than the two of them ever were. He was pleased Lance was doing better. Zach was a kind soul.
Lance called. He had his sixth meeting. It sounded like he was meeting more people. I was pleased he was feeling more like he was part of a group. Friends are good.
Tuesday was yet again a good day. I was given more responsibility on the 10 o'clock show. I liked the on-air personalities a lot. We click. Because I'm doing more, they let me interject a comment a couple of times today. That means a lot. It's still mostly behind the scenes working sound and phones, but I've picked up on everything. I feel very comfortable with everything at work.
I scheduled dinner arrangements with Scott on Wednesday. I invited them over to Mike's place before dinner for a quick drink. Truth be told, I just wanted to see Sascha some more. We would have dinner at Baron 1898, and then head to their place for dessert afterward. It sounded nice.
Mom called me in the afternoon, just as my shift ended.
"Hi, dear."
"Hi, Mom. Are you and Dad doing okay?"
"Yes, we are. In fact, I have news."
"News?"
"Your father ..." she paused. Uh oh. "We've talked. He wants to meet your boyfriend. Would you and Mike meet us for lunch on Saturday. We'd drive there."
"Wow. Big step," I said. "Do you think he's ready for it?"
"To be honest, I'm not sure. I think he is picturing you with someone from school. He really has made a lot of progress. We'll see how it goes."
"How about Jake's? They have an outdoor patio, and the weather is supposed to pretty nice. A tad warm, but not hot."
"That sounds nice. I know where that is. How about 11:30?"
That was unexpected. I hoped it would be good, but what if it was a minefield?
—
Lance called late that night. We hadn't spent much time together lately, so I was glad to see it was him. I wasn't sure if the late hour was indicative of something being wrong.
"Hi, buddy. I need to talk," he said.
"Is everything okay?" I asked.
"Yeah. I think so. Actually, I'm not sure what to think."
"I'm confused," I said.
"I met somebody."
"Somebody ...?"
Lance didn't say anything. I found this strange. It was like his whole thought process pivoted 180 degrees.
"Somebody ... as in a date somebody?" I investigated.
"Uh. I wouldn't call it a date. We just talk. Actually, he kissed me tonight."
"Seriously! Where did you meet? What's he like? Give me details, dude!"
There was a pregnant pause again.
"I'm ... not sure I'm ready for that. Actually, it's not like anything is happening. But I find myself liking him."
"Well, good for you. You're getting out there. Um, does he know you can't drink?"
"He knows."
Lance went silent again.
"For someone who needed to talk, you are telling me nothing," I chided.
"Right. I shouldn't have brought it up," he said, steering me another direction.
"Fine. Leave me hanging, you jerk," I said, with a smile on my face.
Lance went freakishly quiet.
"He won't be you," he said almost inaudibly.
I wasn't sure how to respond.
"Well, he shouldn't be me. He can't be me."
"Right. I guess that's the thing. I'm a little excited to actually like someone, but I'm afraid it will all fall apart. What if I mess this up — not that there is ANYthing to mess up — by comparing him to you."
"Well, don't. Nobody should ever compare anybody to anybody. Let him be himself."
"And that's kind of what I like."
"Take it at the pace you want it to go. It doesn't have to move any faster than you want it to. But I'm happy for you."
"Okay. Thanks. I'll keep you in the loop. Love you, buddy."
"I love you too, Lance."
We hung up. This was a new step for him. But was I happy for him?
July 29
I have no right to be jealous. I have kept Lance at arm's length. He's had deeper feelings for me than I can have for him for several months now. I'm glad he has possibly found someone. But a little bit of me feels ... let go. It is not fair for me to feel jealous nor to never expect him to find someone. I DO want him to find someone. I just had no idea I would feel this way. It's only a little. But I feel it. I remember a good friend in high school feeling depressed when his best friend started dating a girl. The distance created by the new relationship hurt him a bit. Maybe I'm feeling that too. But Lance deserves to be happy. I hope it works out.
Even scarier is Dad wanting to "meet" Mike. He's going to freak out. I just know it. But he loves Mike as Mr. Terry, so maybe he will be relieved I am with someone whom he already likes. So scary!
After work Thursday, I was surprisingly excited. I changed and rushed over to Mike's house. Not only did we have the evening plans, I wanted a little extra time to play with Sascha.
Scott and his partner, Luke, found the house easily. Mike's house was typically clean, but he made sure everything was spic and span. He lit a vanilla candle to mask the last lingering vapors of cleanser.
Luke was not what I pictured Scott's partner would be. He had a very southern drawl. He said he was from Alabama originally. He was sexy as hell in a cowboy hat. He looked like he worked out more than Scott did. Scott was thin. Average build, but not muscular. I'm sure Mike was not what they pictured either.
"Mike, the house is beautiful," Scott said. "I love the backyard."
"Thanks. Trent and I planted those three flower beds a few weeks ago, and they have really taken off."
"It's a touch on the warm side, but why don't we take our wine and sit on the back deck?" I offered. "It's a shame I couldn't invite us all over to my place, but I wouldn't have been able to seat four people in the living room."
I wasn't sure why I needed to confess my apartment's shortcomings, but I had found being yourself and being honest was a good policy.
As the four of us enjoyed the evening outside, Sascha was content to lay at our feet. Until a squirrel captured his interest. Then bees. Eventually he came back beside us. It was one of the rare occasions I heard him bark. I guess that's common with dogs and squirrels.
"So, Mike. I saw you pop into the station a few weeks back. Once I learned who you were, I was delighted to hear we had more `family' at the station," Scott said. "How did you two meet?"
The two of us looked at each other.
"To be honest, Trent was a former student of mine."
Luke gasped.
"He was special," Mike started. "We definitely jumped into romance..."
"... meaning sex," I interjected.
"... too fast," he continued, glaring at me. "I so regret our first encounter, but ... after it was over and I ran it through my mind a million times, I knew I just wanted to see him again."
"Let me tell it. I didn't come out until this spring. I was a mess. I approached Mike, not because I thought he was gay — I mean, I thought he could be gay — but he's such a kind man, and I knew he would be supportive. My basketball team at the university used that high school a few times for practice, and I summoned up the courage to go talk to him."
"You've only been out half a year?" Scott asked in surprise. "You're so self-confident. I'm impressed."
"A lot of that is thanks to this wonderful man," I said, smiling at Mike, who smiled back. I looked at him a moment. I loved him, but would I ever feel comfortable telling people how we met? Weird.
"After Trent graduated college, we realized we had strong feelings for each other after visiting in the spring, so we started a real relationship. And we're incredibly happy, despite everyone telling me how much older I am," Mike said.
"Fuck `em," said Luke.
"Well, one is my mother, so you have to take it sometimes," Mike returned.
"But she loved me, so she's totally awesome," I followed.
"Wonderful," Scott said.
"THIS weekend is a different story. My mother knows Mike and I are together — and she's good with it; pretty good — but Dad meets Mike this weekend. Although he knows him as a former teacher."
"And ya don't think it'll go well?" Luke asked, sounding so southern.
"I have no idea. It could go either way," I said. "But you know, no matter how it turns out, I won't have to hide a single thing anymore. I'm out. We'll be out to everybody."
"Indeed, sweetie," Scott said. "You go."
We became aware of the time. As we started to gather up, Luke commented on how nice Mike's dog is.
"It's actually my ex-boyfriend's."
Scott and Luke looked at each other and then me.
"He's away on a trip, and Ethan asked if Mike would watch him," I interjected.
"Hm. Well, okay. It's nice that the two of you are still friends. Besides," Scott said looking at me, "I'm sure he can't hold a candle to Trent."
"Oh, yes he can. Picture sex on legs. That's Ethan," I quipped.
Mike pulled me close to him and hugged me tight, messing up my hair. I giggled.
"And no, he can't compare to Trent," Mike said, giving me a sloppy smooch on my cheek. "Trent is the most amazing person I've ever fallen in love with."
"Aw," the other two echoed.
We followed them to Baron 1898. It wasn't as quite as fancy as Lawrence Creek, but pretty close. With summer temperatures, only a few people were in a tie. We weren't.
Luke ordered steak and a baked potato. I had almond-crusted tilapia with orzo pasta. Mike had blackened chicken with tropical rice. Scott had a salad the size of South Dakota with shrimp on top. Dinner was excellent.
Our gaydar went off on the server and we started discussing a few other staff members just for the fun of it.
"So how did you two meet?" I asked.
"Believe it or not, my old apartment complex. It was a couple years ago. I walked out to the pool one Saturday afternoon. Here was this gorgeous hunk all sweaty in a very skimpy swimsuit," Scott said.
"It wuzn't that skimpy," Luke countered.
"Baby, I could tell both balls were positioned to one side."
Luke threw his napkin over Scott's head, shaking his head "no."
"But somehow, this beautiful man started talking to me," Scott said, slowly removing the napkin.
"I like trim men, not ta mention I'm taken in by blondes, so I struck up a conversation, and we b'came aware we were both gay, and just hit it off," Luke said.
"And we're getting married in October."
"Hey, that's wonderful!" both Mike and I said.
"I have close friends doing a fall wedding, too." I said. "They're straight, but I'm in the wedding."
We talked a bit more, but soon realized we should let the server turn the table.
We had divided the bill, and the server returned with our credit cards.
"I've enjoyed taking care of you and looking at you," he said. "You fellas have a great night and a wonderful weekend."
We tipped big.
At their home, I looked around. It wasn't quite as large as Mike's, but close. We weren't offered a tour of the house, but I loved the furniture in the living room. The men had good taste.
Scott cut some cake on the counter.
"It's just chocolate cake, but it's topped with raspberry cream, fresh raspberries, white chocolate shavings and a scoop of raspberry sorbet," Scott said, handing each of us a plate.
We responded with "Oooo."
It was delicious. He also brewed some decaf and added some Bailey's Irish Crème. Perfection.
We visited some more, but after an hour of conversation, it felt late enough that we should get home. It had been a splendid evening. Scott hugged both of us and Luke kissed each of us on the cheek, much to my surprise.
In the car, I was just hoping Mike would be happy with how the night went. He had been looking to enlarge his circle of friends.
"Well?" I finally asked.
"I had a great time," he said. "They are really nice. I was just thinking how I used to have nights like that and then just stopped. Shame on me. But thank you, babe. Thanks for bringing me back out into the gay world."
"And the kissing cowboy?" I added.
"Ha. Don't let that throw you. A lot of my old friends would always greet me with a kiss on the cheek. We're an affectionate people."
We pulled into the driveway. I didn't go in; I just walked to my car.
"I hate to go home, but I have work early. If I stayed, I would just play with Sascha and then want to have sex, so I need to just head home. I'll see you Saturday at Jake's."
"I had fun," he said.
We kissed in the driveway. It was a long kiss.
"I love you," we said at the same time.
July 28
What a fun night! It was great to make new friends. Scott and Luke were a nice couple. I'm pleased Mike was open to making new friends. It was a wonderful evening.
It is funny that I don't even feel like a college student in the slightest anymore. I am building my life: my own place, my career, a circle of friends. It is nice feeling like an adult.
On Friday, I cleaned my place thoroughly. I knew I would see Mike in the morning, and I just saw him last night, so I devoted the entire evening to taking care of my apartment. Not that there was a lot, but I hadn't focused on cleaning in a while.
It had been a wonderful week.
—
Saturday morning had me skittish. I was really worried about what Dad would think. Really, really worried. But the day of reckoning was upon me. I hoped for the best. I was too nervous to eat breakfast.
I got to Jake's a little early to make sure we could get a patio table. I told Mike to meet us at 11:30.
Mom and Dad arrived a little early, about 11:25.
I hugged them.
"I have had the best week," I started. "I keep getting more responsibility at work. They like me. I like the whole team there too. I even got to talk on the radio a couple times."
"Why?" Dad asked.
"The talk show hosts are discussing a topic, and occasionally they will throw it to me, Trent, the assistant producer. It's fun."
"You aren't nervous?" Mom asked.
"Nope, not at all." I threw in a transition. "I was more nervous about meeting Mike's parents. But they loved me."
"Ohhh nice!" Mom smiled.
"Mike? Mike? Have I met him? Was he on your team? Or the theater club?" Dad asked.
"Um. Yes. No and no."
I saw Mike walk up behind them.
"Hello, everyone," he said.
"Mr. Terry!" Dad said, smiling and standing up to shake his hand.
"Please, call me Mike."
An expression of shock crossed Dad's face. It's like an entire hard drive had downloaded into his brain. His eyes were putting together pieces in nanoseconds, but it took his brain a moment to make sense of the puzzle. A stick of dynamite went off in his head.
"This is ... I don't ... I ... I can't ..." Dad stammered for a moment. "This is unbelievable. UNBELIEVABLE!!" Dad stood up and started to walk away. "C'mon, Diane!"
"Dad ..." I started.
There were two other tables on the patio. They stared at us. Mike and I stood like statues.
Mom sighed and came around and gave each of us a quick hug. "I'll do my best, dear."
"Diane!!"
Mike and I sat down in disbelief.
"Well, that could have gone better," Mike said.
"To be sure."
My stomach was in knots. What did Mike feel? It was clearly a rejection of him. We both turned to each other.
"I'm sorry," we said at the same time.
He felt bad for me.
"Nope. Don't feel bad. I knew this would be a possibility. It's all on him. This is his problem. I'm not taking this on. I feel sorry for Mom; she will feel trapped in the middle, but ... I am not letting this weigh on me. My father is an asshole and that's his issue."
"It is quite a surprise to see your son dating a former teacher though, babe."
"Fuck him."
A server came over. "Can I get you anything?"
"Yes! Indeed, you can! I'll have a Diet Coke, and he'll have your house draft."
Mike just watched me.
"Fuck, Dad."
—
It was an awkward day, but I was determined not to let the episode get me down. I worked on the play; Mike read some. He dozed off for a nap. While he did so, I played with Sascha in the back yard.
We simply had soup for dinner.
"How are you doing, honey?" he asked.
"Okay. Fair. Totally fine! Whatever."
I tried to be relatively good company. Mike was sympathetic for me. At the same time, he had to feel slighted by my father. What a crappy thing for Dad to do.
August 1
This week was going so well. Really well. So many good things — the job, Lance, new friends.
Dad totally fucked it up. So, okay, there IS an age difference. Even if Mike was a former teacher of mine, clearly Dad does not see me as an adult. I'm sure people will say, "Give him time." Well, he can have all the fucking time he wants. I don't need to talk to him for a long time. Or ever.
I decided to go for a run after dinner. Often Mike would join me, but he could tell I needed to burn off some steam on my own. I listened to the morning conversation in my mind a hundred times. I said I was not going to let it get me down. The tear running down my cheek was an indication I was lying to myself. But I shrugged it off, wiping the tear on my sleeve.
I showered as it was getting dark. I came out into the living room wearing a pair of boxers. Mike had a glass of wine. I decided I deserved one and poured me a glass.
I curled up next to him on the couch. We put on something completely light-hearted. Neither of us needed anything heavy to watch.
The day took its toll on me, and I went to bed early, completely exhausted. I fell asleep fairly quicky, having no idea what time Mike even came to bed.
—
I got up to pee just as the sun was coming up. Sascha was curled up next to the mound in the blanket that was Mike. I smiled at the two of them sleeping together. When I returned, Sascha lifted his head to look at me. I scratched him behind the ears making his tail wag, and we both returned to sleep.
I heard Mike get up an hour later. I looked at him as he came back to the bed. He leaned over to kiss me.
"Good morning, hon'," he said.
I reached out to hold his dick. He kissed me again. We kissed more. I realized he may have wanted sex last night, and I had just crashed. But it was a rough day. I'm not sure either of us would have been in the mood. However, as we kissed, his penis was getting stiff as I held it.
Sascha got off the bed.
Mike reached down to grope me. I was getting hard feeling him getting hard.
I don't think either of us were in the mood for a wild frenzy, but a little sexual relief would serve us well.
We spent the next 10 minutes in a 69 position. As we sucked on each other's erect anatomy, we stayed with light moaning. We were content with a gentler sex experience this morning. Not that it didn't feel good. Mike's blow jobs were still superb. As we feasted on male flesh, our hands roamed and groped our sides, our ass cheeks, our groins. It felt good.
I came first. I sucked harder as my cock fired directly into Mike's mouth. His erection was certain to vibrate with my groaning around it. He took his mouth off my rod to catch his breath and then continued to swallow my orgasm.
Mike rolled onto his back and my hand immediately gripped his wet, stiff shaft. I stroked him hard knowing he wasn't that far behind me. Once I come, I'm not always a fan of taking his load in my mouth, so I kept the manual manipulation of his genitals in a rapid rhythm.
"Yeah, J.T." he called out.
I cranked my strokes into high gear. He was there. I took my other hand and cupped the head of his cock. I felt his cum squirt into my palm. He kept coming. He groaned loudly, breaking the quiet tone our sex had previously held. His breathing was heavy. I switched hands to finish the job, now full of his cum, sliding up and down his dick with slippery, gooey, sticky eroticism. Mike still cried out in his orgasm. The last spasms of liquid added to the sensual stimulation.
He took a gasp of air in. I licked just the tip of his cock for just a taste.
"That was different," he said, as my sticky hand remained on his shaft.
I kissed him and went for a washcloth. Sascha looked up at my naked body and then rested his head back down. I loved the dog but felt sheepishly peeped at.
—
That afternoon, Lance called.
"Are you with Mike?"
"Yes, he's next to me."
"Put me on speaker."
I did.
"Hey, what's up," Mike acknowledged.
"I am down 13 pounds!"
"In four weeks?" Mike asked.
"Yeah!" Lance sounded happy. "I mean, it does fluctuate, but I weigh after my shift every day at the gym. No beer, more exercise and Evan is helping me eat better things."
"Fantastic," I encouraged.
"I still want to ditch about five more pounds, but they'll be harder now."
"Proud of you, Lance," Mike said.
"Gotta get in top form for New Year's Eve, right?" Lance laughed.
I didn't. I just rolled my eyes. I didn't want to think about that again.
"Can we meet Thursday night?"
"What happens Thursday?" I asked.
"I can show you something then."
"That sounds mysterious, but ... okay. Should we come by your place?"
"Yes. Evan and I will fix dinner around 7."
"Works for us."
—
The following week was not as great. Work was still good; it was nice seeing Scott. However, I didn't get to say anything on the radio. I still talked to Lance every day. He just seemed better. Happier. Good for him.
I texted Mom. Things were not good at home. She and Dad were at odds. He is upset at her for being so accepting of Mike. Crap.
I was looking forward to visiting with Lance. I was in high spirits when Thursday evening came.
Mike and I arrived on time. Evan welcomed us. Neither of them had really fancy dishes or place settings, but Evan made the table look nice with placemats and napkins folded elegantly. He had prepared a lemon chicken dish. Lance had roasted Brussels sprouts with parmesan crumbs and made long-grain wild rice. The meal was so unlike Lance, but he seemed very proud serving it. We started with a butternut squash soup.
"This is delicious," I said.
Mike also complimented the meal.
"Lance, you said over the weekend you wanted to show us something," Mike said.
Lance walked into the kitchen. He came back holding a new coin.
"I got my One Month coin last night. I've made it a month. I'm still at 13 pounds, but I'm trying to get down a few more."
"Congratulations, buddy! I cannot tell you how proud I am of you." I beamed looking at Lance. I meant every word.
"I feel better every day. I'm stronger, my wrist is getting better, I feel better without those pounds — and I have to thank Evan for some of that. He's a good influence."
"Oh, please," Evan said, refusing to accept any praise.
We all talked about work for a little bit. Mike was fine letting us carry the conversation because he was glad to be free from it for two more weeks.
"You should have seen Mike two weeks ago," I joked. "I was in another room, and I heard him scream. I rushed out to see what was wrong, and he was staring at the TV. It was the first `Back to School' sale he saw advertised."
We all laughed.
"It was too soon. They always start too soon. Those ads are like daggers."
"You're a good teacher. I'm sure you miss being with students," I said.
"Some. But having some free time — and down time — is a rejuvenating thing. Teachers need it. August is always tough; you know you are headed back soon."
We cleared the table. No dessert. Evan was a good influence on Lance. I saw Lance whisper into Mike's ear. He nodded. What was that all about?
A few minutes later, Lance asked me if I could take a walk. I agreed.
"I asked Mike if I could talk with you privately. Mike's great, but you and I ... I can tell you anything."
"Absolutely. Is everything okay?"
"Yeah. But I'm being thrown a curveball. I told you I was kind of interested in someone."
"Yes, you did. Is it going well?"
"I'm not sure. Actually, it is, but ... there is a wrinkle." He hesitated. "We slept in my bed last night."
"Okay. What's the wrinkle? Is he no good in bed? Is he bigger than you? Wants it too much?"
"We didn't have sex."
"Oh." I got silent. "I'm not sure what to say."
"His name is Jakob. He's in my AA group."
"I see," I said, thinking I was scared of that whole idea. "I might remember him from your first meeting. Is he the one ... who ... didn't have a bed?"
"Um. Yeah. He lives in the shelter," Lance said.
"Wow. I ... I don't want to judge anybody, buddy, but do you think he is right for you? That is a bit of a wrinkle."
"That's not it. He associates sex with drinking — his past was rough. He's afraid to take it too far; he doesn't want to relapse."
"Okay, that's a big fucking wrinkle. What are you going to do? You're Mr. Sex All the Time."
"Nice. Swell," Lance said sarcastically. "But ... I know. I'm really taken with him, Trent. There's something there. I can't wait to see him again. That has to mean something, doesn't it?"
"It sure does. You're falling for him."
I didn't like this at all. But who was I to judge? It was too much baggage. Was Lance strong enough to go through this? What about this Jakob? Was he? If sex did equal drinking, would they both be drawn down? I didn't like it.
"Lance. You know I love you. So much. But I'd be lying if I didn't say the situation didn't concern me."
"I understand. I sometimes have my reservations too."
"But. Now that I just heard you say that out loud, how many people had reservations about Mike and me? And we're awesome. As long as you are careful, I can be supportive. And I am always here for you. Always. No matter what."
"C'mere."
We stopped walking, and he gave me a simple kiss.
Back in the house, we sat down in the living room. Evan had some peach tea for all of us. I chuckled on the inside thinking he would be a great gay host. We didn't know him that well, but Evan seemed like a good guy. I was completely thankful for his good influence on Lance.
"Now that I have the One Month chip, I am not sure what to do with this one," Lance said, looking at the 24-hour chip. It was five days, so it wasn't just 24 hours. It was kind of a welcome thing. I wonder if I should just trash this."
"May I keep it?" Mike asked. "It means something to me."
"It does? I mean, sure, if it does, then ... yeah."
"I know where I can put it. It was a turning point for you, so it means something to me. And if you ever want it back, I'll have it."
Lance stared at Mike for a long time. I could tell he was moved. He didn't say anything, which meant Lance was really touched. Lance walked to Mike and handed him the chip. Mike slipped it in his pocket. Lance leaned forward and gave Mike a quick kiss on the lips. He then realized that it was the first time Evan saw him kiss a man. It would be my boyfriend, of course. Evan didn't bat an eye.
We stayed a little longer. As we got ready to leave, both Mike and I told Lance how good he looked. No matter what I felt about this new relationship, Lance was definitely doing much better.
August 5
I'm not sure what kind of friend I am. Lance seems to have found someone, but everything about this guy seems wrong. What if he throws Lance off and it causes him to drink again? I don't like it.
But I haven't met the man. How can I be so judgmental? That's not fair. I just don't know what to think. I can imagine what his father would think. Too many red flags. They are both lawyers, and their son is falling for someone living in a shelter. This just scares the crap out of me.
* * * *
This chapter has a bit of overlap between If It Weren't For the Two of Us and Hi, I'm Lance. I hope readers are enjoying both books.
Check out the blog: timothylane414stories.blogspot.com
Email: timothylane414@gmail.com