If It Weren't For the Two of Us Chapter 32
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32
Mike and I joined Lance for a second meeting Friday night. He grabbed my hand once again, and Mike put his arm around Lance's shoulder.
As Lance listened to people sharing, I noticed his knee bouncing with nervous energy. He was still scared. We had become so close, but I didn't really know what his fears were. Was he afraid to talk? Was he afraid that he might relapse? Was he afraid of being judged? Lance was always so confident, borderline arrogant even. Here he seemed so fragile. Sometimes a person sharing would say something that would cause him to squeeze my hand tighter. I listened to his breathing almost shudder.
As the meeting was winding down, I leaned over.
"Want to share?" I whispered.
He shook his head. "I'm not ready."
I knew I couldn't protect Lance or make his pain go away. I was glad I was there for him, but that was about all I could do.
Ophelia wasn't here tonight. In fact, most of the people looked different. Most of the shares were sad stories, but there were a couple of celebrations mixed in. Lance got his second signature.
The three of us enjoyed a pizza at Roman Column. Mike told Lance that he was proud of him. Lance smiled and nodded, but slightly cocked his head. He probably felt Mike was proud of him for not screwing up. Still, the words had to be nice to hear.
"I hope I can stick with it. Some days I'm fine. Last night I walked into the kitchen and saw that chip there and realized my body was going for a beer on auto pilot."
Lance paused. Mike and I put our pizza down.
"I just stared at the chip and then I could see Dad's face in the hospital," he continued. "When I came out into the waiting area ... his face. I will remember it until I'm 90. He's the most supporting father, but I saw the look of pity come over him and ... and ...
Lance sniffed. It took him a moment, but he regained his composure.
"I stared at the chip. I'm glad I put it there. It punishes me. It makes me think of Dad's face and insists that I don't fuck it up again. Like hell I'm ever starting over. I'm going to make this work."
"Are you ready for full days at work next week?" I asked, trying to offer a change of subject.
"Yes. Work went well this week. Honestly, I did feel better. Well, I had bruises and a broken wrist, but ... mentally, I was better. The sling comes off after tonight. Yea!!"
"You're going to make it," I encouraged.
"If you can make it six months, Trent and I will reward you," Mike said. "On New Year's Day we will recreate the shower from the spring. Obviously not at school." He chuckled. "We'll do it at my house."
Lance's eyes were half dollars.
"Wait! What? Huh? What?" I blurted.
"If he can go half a year without drinking, we'll celebrate the new year in a grand way."
I was gobsmacked. "Did you really just offer me up for sex with someone else?"
"We've all done it before. It will be a just-once special event," said Mike.
Lance didn't know how to respond. He uttered, "Seriously??" It was like Mike's offer was too good to be true.
I said nothing the rest of dinner. We gave Lance a hug at his door. I told him I would call him tomorrow.
Back in the car, Mike started what he assumed was going to be a bad conversation.
"You got really quiet," he said.
"Well, gee. I wonder why!??" I yelled.
"Babe, it's not that big of a ..."
"Don't say it's not a big deal! You just offered my body into a three-way. You didn't even think that it might be a good idea to ask me first??"
"Babe, I just wanted to give Lance something to strive for. It's not like we're screwing other people right and left. I thought a goal would help him. You two are so close. You see each other naked all the time. The three of us have had sex before. It will just be one night. IF it even happens."
"I know you have a valid point in there and that your intentions were to encourage Lance. I do. But ... it would kill me to see you have sex with someone else. We're in a commitment. Or so I thought. Apparently, I'm just up for grabs whenever you decide!"
"Honey, of course not. We're us. You're mine. I'm yours. I don't want that to ever change. I'm sorry. I thought one night of reward ... New Year's Eve ... we all consent. That's all."
I looked down.
"But ... you didn't even get my consent. Sex with Trent just went on sale ... that's what I felt like."
"Baby, I'm so sorry. I totally didn't mean it that way."
I didn't say anything for a while. I leaned my head against the car window. I watched streetlights and illuminated store signs pass by the car. I breathed but didn't talk.
"Just go ahead and drop me at my place. I think I'll just stay home tonight."
"Trent ..."
He pulled into my parking lot.
"Please don't be mad."
"Good night," I said and got out of the car.
"J.T.!"
The door slammed.
July 10
What a week. Lance has made good progress. Two meetings. At least eight to go, but hopefully he will try to stick with them. He's gone one week without drinking. I'm really, really proud of him. My buddy has turned a corner.
Dad has too. He seems to have come around. Well, a little. He has a long way to go. I keep giving him time. But there is progress I suppose.
Mike totally pissed me off! While I completely understand what he was trying to do, how do you offer up your boyfriend for sex without discussing it with him first!? I can't believe it. It's the first time I have felt outrage at him. I hate feeling this way. It's nothing we can't get past, but ... GRRRR!! I just can't believe he did it. We had a fight.
—
Saturday afternoon, my phone buzzed. Was I ready to accept an apology? Was he even going to apologize?
It was Mom.
"Dad said the two of you talked. I'm glad. Are things better? How do you feel on your end?"
"Better. I guess. He seems to be trying. I still feel like he won't be happy until I'm straight. But I think he knows I'm happy. That seems to mean something to him."
"I'm trying dear. Give Mike my best."
Right. How about a slap across the face? I felt miserable. We've never been on the outs. I totally, completely love him, but just feel slighted by last night.
Mike and I didn't talk all day. I told Mom I was happy, but today ... not so much. It was off; everything was off. My emotions needed an outlet. I wanted to be near a piano. I wrote.
Dinner seemed devoid of taste. I ate half of it.
Night fell. I wished I had a bottle of wine. And that thought made me feel worse. Those are the feelings that caused Lance to go down that path. When would I feel better? Surely, I would, right?
My phone buzzed.
"Can we talk?" the message read.
"OK"
My phone rang. I answered.
"Before you say anything," Mike blurted out, "I am so sorry. I am so sorry. I am so sorry."
I could tell he had been crying. It was in his voice. He sniffed between words.
"Mike..."
"Trent, I fucked up. You were right. I only thought about Lance. I didn't even consider your feelings. I'm so sorry. That was shitty of me."
"I just ... didn't feel valued. Like my thoughts and opinions didn't matter. I was just ... offered up."
"You're right. Completely. I am so sorry," he said, completely bursting into tears. Loud tears.
"Mike."
"I love you so much, Trent." He sniffed. "I would never do anything to hurt you, to make you feel less than what you are. I am so sorry. I've sat here all day feeling like shit. Knowing that I hurt you. It's Saturday. You're not here. We're not together. It's all wrong. I am so mad that I fucked that up."
He cried harder.
"Mike, stop. I ... I can come over."
"No. I'm a mess. I'm sorry. I just ... just wanted you to know that I love you more than anything in the world and hate myself for making you feel bad and hurt. Please, please forgive me. I'm so sorry."
"Mike. I forgive you. I know your heart was in the right place ... at least in regard to Lance. I can't imagine anything more motivating than sex with the two hottest guys in town."
He made a slight chuckle through the tears.
"If it motivates him, it seems ... odd. But I can ... share you one night. But only ONE. Let's not start going down a weird path. I want you all to myself."
"Yes. Totally. I love you so much, J.T. Please know that. You mean the world to me. I needed you to know that."
"I do. I understand. I love you too. Get some rest. Good night."
—
Mike and I made plans for dinner Tuesday night. Work was great for me both Monday and Tuesday. I called Lance both days to see how the full days went. He was feeling up. I think having the arm out of the sling helped.
"Trent, guess what!!?" he said, sounding so excited.
"Yeah?"
"I've lost five pounds since the car accident. Five pounds!!"
"Hey!! That's great."
"I know, right? That's even with pizza now and then. I guess working in a gym has its advantages. I mean, I have to be careful with the wrist and all, but when work is done, I try to get in some exercise. Not to mention giving up four or five beers a night. That saves a lot of calories."
"You are the man!!"
"I am doing another meeting tonight. A closed one this time. I think I might share."
"That's awesome, buddy. So, so proud of you."
Fucking proud!! Here is the best friend I wanted back for a long time. He's doing it.
An hour later, I pulled into Mike's driveway. There was another car. I walked in wondering who might be there. We had dinner plans.
There was another man in the living room with Mike. I believe it was the man I saw the night I was with Detrell. If my suspicions were correct, it was Ethan.
"Uh. Hi. I can come back later if I'm interrupting something."
"Of course not. Come in, babe," Mike said. "Trent, this is Ethan."
"Hi." I stuck out my hand to shake his.
Ethan took my hand and gave it a really firm grip.
"My, you are a young thing, aren't you?" he said.
"Ethan!" Mike warned.
"I'm sorry, that didn't come out right. It's nice to meet you, Trent. He had told me that you were younger, so my comment didn't sound very polite. Please forgive me. It's nice to meet you, Trent."
"Hi."
Ethan was at least six feet-one. He was as hairy as Mike and physically gorgeous. He had beautiful arms. His scruffy beard had the slightest hint of gray at the chin. I estimated him to be about 35 at least. I wasn't a good judge of age. He possibly could have been 40. Standing next to him, I felt 11.
I couldn't help but wonder what this was about.
"Look out back," Mike said.
I went to the window. I saw a dog. "Oooo."
"That's Sascha," Ethan said. "He's a sweetie."
I went out to engage the dog. It was a beautiful Golden Retriever. He seemed very friendly. He didn't bark when I came out but came up with tail wagging. He accepted affection immediately. I always wanted a dog growing up, but Mom was against it. She always said they already got me a piano. I enjoyed playing with Sascha for a few minutes.
Heading back inside, I complimented Ethan on how beautiful Sascha was. I felt sheepish standing with the two of them for some reason. Mike pulled me close and gave me a quick kiss.
"Ethan has to be overseas for two weeks. He's wanting me to watch Sascha."
"I hope you said yes," I blurted out.
Ethan chuckled.
"Oh, for sure. I've missed him. Sascha," Mike said, clarifying.
"Is this ... right now?"
"Ha. No. I just wouldn't spring it on Mike like that. I leave on the 18th," Ethan said.
His voice sounded like a sportscaster announcing a football game. I couldn't have felt more insignificant standing next to this perfect specimen of a man.
"Where are you traveling to, Ethan?"
"Spain," he told me. "One week is work related, and I'm taking a second week to relax and enjoy the country."
"Nice."
"Well, I should be getting back and letting you two get to dinner. I'll go gather Sascha."
I watched Ethan call Sascha, and the dog came right away. What a good dog.
"The backyard looks great, Mike."
"Thanks. Trent and I planted some of those flowers last weekend."
We said our goodbyes to both of them.
We stepped back into the living room.
"Oh, Miiiiiiiike!" I said burying my face into his shoulder.
"What? What are you doing?"
"How can I compete with THAT? He's like ... like Mr. Universe ... the Bachelor ... James Bond ... How can I follow THAT??"
He hugged me.
"You can't follow that," he said. Placing his hands on my face to make me look at him. "You're in front of that. He's way behind you."
He gave me one of the most passionate kisses he'd given in a long time. I'm not sure if it was to make up for the weekend or to alleviate my anxiety.
Suddenly he picked me up. I laughed hysterically. He carried me into the bedroom. He laid me on the bed and then climbed on top of me. We kissed madly.
"Please take off all your clothes," he whispered into my ear.
He rolled off and we both scrambled to get out of our clothes. In mere moments we were groping each other's naked bodies. Our mouths kissed and ran up and down each other's necks. And ears. And chests. My hand reached for his penis. It was granite.
"Ohhh, I could sure use that inside me. Want to fuck me?" I invited.
"Absolutely."
It was no surprise to see him reach for the drawer. It was a surprise to see what he pulled out. Papers.
"Just wanted you to know that I got my results back. As promised, I had a test done. Both of us are free and clear and proven on paper."
"Aw. I knew you were fine. That was a kind gesture."
He placed the papers on the nightstand and grabbed a towel and the lube. I soon felt his finger slicken my hole. His probing digit stimulated my ass. I hadn't been fucked in a few weeks. I was eager. Two fingers spread me open. He lifted my legs, knelt down and slowly entered my channel with his hardened organ. The pain was just momentary, not long at all. I adjusted and moaned my approval.
A second push thrust his cock in the entire way. He grunted loudly. I returned it. He gently moved in and out for a minute.
"I needed this," I said.
"Oh me, too, baby."
We groaned and grunted as he worked his slippery erection in and out and in and out. We kept it going for several minutes. I reached for my cock and pulled for a while. It felt electrified with Mike sexually stimulating me in my ass. I let go and watched my hard prick dance as Mike banged my hole with his crotch.
"Trent, I feel so good inside you. I feel so fucking good."
Even after sliding his erection up and down my male corridor, the lube kept things slick enough to make it all sexually energizing. We groaned and grunted in harmony as he worked me like a machine. I, particularly, was getting loud. My ass was on fire — in a thrilling way.
Mike withdrew his cock and rolled me on my side. With a few more drops of additional lube on his dick, he moved up behind me and his rod found my hole once again. I groaned as he plunged the sword deep in my gut. I liked this position. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me back into his chest. His thrusting hips crashed my ass. We both grunted loudly. His mouth was now at my ear.
"I love making love to the man I love," he whispered into my ear. `I love you, J.T."
"Oh yeah," I answered.
"I love fucking you. It feels so good fucking you."
"I love you inside me, Michael."
We twisted our necks to kiss as best we could while he continued to shove his manhood in my burning hole. Even when we weren't kissing, our mouths were close as his cock fucked me. I felt it drill all the way in with each thrust.
"Yeah," I said.
"Fuck yes," he echoed.
"Don't stop, baby. Just keep fucking me, honey. I love it."
"My cock is throbbing, babe. It feels so good. I'm so close."
"Fuck me, Mike! Harder!! Fuck me until you come inside me."
He fiercely shoved his rod into my ass. I loved these stimulating sensations. I resumed working on my own cock. I pulled on it, making it fully hard again. I moaned louder now with my own stimulation. Mike's breathing was loud and ragged. He placed his forehead on my neck. I could feel perspiration on my skin. He kissed me again, moaning into my mouth. I knew he was there. He screamed in my ear.
"Ohhhh yeeeeaah. I'm coming baby. I'm shooting my load inside you."
"Do it babe. You're so deep in me."
Ever so slightly, the muscles in my ass could detect his cock pulsing as his orgasm unleashed within me. His bucking hips continued to crash into me, then stopped. He let out a final groan before a huge exhale and wrapped his arm tighter around me. He pushed his cock in firmly one more time. "Oh, babe."
He pulled his flesh from mine and rolled onto his back, and I sprang into action. I jumped up and stood in the bed. My feet straddled his body. He stared at me from feet below. I yanked my cock with every muscle in my arm.
"Michael, I want to come all over you."
"Do it, J.T."
I pounded and pounded. My cock was fiery red. It burned for this man. I stroked my hard-on violently; it felt harder. The nerve endings in my flesh were electric.
"I'm getting close."
"Do it!!"
"Oh yeah. I'm going to come."
The first stream shot directly to his face and pillow. The next hit his neck.
"Yeah baby. Come all over me."
I hit his chest. I hit his nipples. I dripped on his navel. I splattered everywhere. The light from the window made the liquid spilled across his body glisten. My cock had bedazzled him.
My breathing was still heavy as I looked down on Mike, recovering from my climax. I had rained cum all over his body. Mike's cum is pearlier than mine. My cum is more liquified. It was everywhere. He smiled up at me.
I dropped to my knees and kissed him.
"I love you," we both said at the same time.
I laid to his side and held his hand.
"That was fucking unbelievable," I said.
"You came A LOT!"
"I was overdue."
We turned our heads for a simple kiss. We moaned a simple hum as if we were eating ice cream.
"Not to make things awkward, but I never felt this way with Ethan. We had good sex. Really good sex, for a while. But never like this. He was just quieter."
"Surely you have some good memories though."
"Oh yeah. Seeing him stirs up some old feelings. I'll always care for him. I will. I wish him well. But ... the second he left all I could think about is how much I wanted you."
Those words were like a powerful wave that swept over me. If I felt any insecurity while Ethan was here, it was gone. I felt fully in love and nothing more.
* * * *
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