************** If I let You Go 15 **************
*********** Ryan's POV ***********
"Jason..." I trailed off, not sure how to react to that line. It was probably the most romantic thing anyone ever said to him. Jack's words came back to haunt him. I know I will always regret it if I don't work up the courage to tell Jason how I feel. Maybe Jason also likes me the same way I like him. Maybe he's just waiting for me to make the first move. Maybe---I should tell him right this second how I feel.
"Good night," Jason whispered to me softly as he let go of my hand. I was still working up the courage to tell him just what I was feeling when he turned his back to me. I sighed out deeply as I watched his body relaxes and he fell asleep.
I fell asleep wondering if I will ever get the courage to tell Jason how I feel. I'm afraid to ruin a good thing. We're pretty good friends now. What if he doesn't like me that way? I'd surely lose him as a friend. Things will definitely get weird between us.
I must have died in my sleep and gone to heaven. When I opened my eyes the next day, I saw Jason half-naked as he was searching for a shirt in his bag. I sat up groggily as Jason put on a red shirt. He turned around and flashed me a huge smile.
"I'm glad you're awake," Jason said to me. "I fixed you breakfast."
"Huh?" I looked at him quizzically as I rub my eyes. Instead of answering me Jason picked up a tray and put it down on the bed beside me. I stared at him in disbelief as he sat down and started to put butter on a toast.
"I woke up early so I thought I'd cook you breakfast," Jason said casually. "I hope your grandmother won't mind that."
"N-no," I was still staring at him in disbelief. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. Why does he do these kinds of things to me? The more time I spend with him, the more I feel that he likes me that way. I know that this day won't end without me telling him just how much I love him.
********** Jason's POV **********
As I watch Ryan go in the den with his mom, I can't help but feel a little afraid for him. What if his mom can't accept his sexuality? I don't want to see Ryan unhappy. I want to see him smiling at me always.
"It's going to be okay," I heard someone say behind me. I turned around and saw Nana standing there. She gave me a glass of lemonade and asked me to accompany her outside. I gave her a warm smile and walked with her to the gardens.
"I haven't seen my grandson this happy," Nana told me as she inspected some flowers starting to bloom. I was standing beside her as I sipped my lemonade. I didn't really know how to react to that one. She stood up and grinned at me. "Thanks for putting that smile in Ryan's face."
"I...umm..." I stammered out stupidly as she laughed at my discomfort. I blushed deeply as we continued walking in her beautiful garden. She was cutting some red roses when she looked at me and asked me a question that caught me off guard.
"You really got in a fight with your grandfather because of Ryan?" Nana wasn't looking at me as he just looked at the flowers.
"Ryan's a friend that is worth fighting for," I whispered to her softly.
"I'm glad to hear that," Nana glanced at me for a second and gave me a smile. She then started telling me about her gardens and about the flowers she planted. Half and hour later, Ryan came out of the house and joined us.
"Hey," Ryan grinned at me as Nana picked the last of the flowers she needed.
"I'll leave you two alone," I could swear I could see Nana smiling at Ryan and me slyly. We watched nana walk back to the house before we walked to the oak tree again. Ryan sat down on the swing and I started to push him.
"My mom's okay with everything," Ryan said in a happy voice. "Thanks for being here for me. I wouldn't get the courage to come out if you weren't here." Then Ryan glanced at me and smiled again at my direction, "Thanks for cooking me breakfast again."
"I knew you were going to tell you mom the truth so I just wanted you to feel relaxed," I laughed out a little as I continue to push him gently. I saw Jack and Drake walking up to us then. We started talking about plans about sailing to Boston.
********** Ryan's POV **********
"Careful," I felt Jason's arms snaking around my waist and pulling me closer to him as the boat leaned to one side. It was late afternoon and we just started sailing up the New England Coast. I looked up and saw the concern in his eyes.
"I---haven't really went sailing before," I said to Jason weakly.
"Then you'd better stay close to me," Jason winked at me. He didn't let go of me immediately. I could feel his hard muscular body pressing against mine. His hot breathe on my skin, driving me wild.
"Okay," Okay? I could have said I'd stay very close to you Jason. But no, I had to say okay. Why do I get so tongue-tied around him? I felt Jason letting me go of me. I didn't want him to but I couldn't tell him not to stop hugging me.
Jason then walked towards Drake and helped me steer the yacht. I sat down on a lounge chair and just watched the three running around the ship. I wanted to see the sun setting in the horizon so I walked to the railing to get a better view. Then a strong gust of wind suddenly blew. I felt the boat rocking so I grabbed the railing tightly.
"Ryan!" I heard Jason yelling out and then I felt someone pushing me away. I fell down on the deck. I was just in time to see the huge mast swinging wildly and hitting Jason on the head. Jason cried out as he fell down beside me unconscious.
"Jason!" I knelt down beside him. I didn't know what to do or what to say. Then I felt Drake and Jack beside me. I couldn't breath and I couldn't think. I didn't want to lose Jason. There were a lot of things I needed to tell him.
*********** Jason's POV ***********
I opened my eyes slowly. My head was hurting badly. It felt like there was a band playing in my head. I tried to sit up but I felt someone pushing me back on the bed gently.
"Take it easy," A familiar voice said to me softly.
"Ryan?" I blinked a few times and Ryan's worried face came into focus.
"How you feeling?" Ryan asked me as I felt his soft hand caressing my cheek gently.
"It feels like my head's about to split open," I groaned out in pain.
"Sorry," I saw tears starting to fall down his eyes. "If not for me, you wouldn't be in this predicament."
"I'm just glad you're okay," I smiled at him weakly.
"Jack said that we'll be arriving in New Haven in an hour," Ryan told me. "Just hang in there, okay?"
"I'm okay," I grabbed his hand and gave it a tight squeeze. "It's just a nasty bump." We just stared at each other in the tiny cabin for a while. Ryan was continuing to caress my cheeks with his soft velvety hands.
"Does it hurt here?" Ryan asked me gently as he lightly touched my forehead.
"A little," I nodded my head at him. I saw Ryan chewing his lips as he made a circular motion with his finger on my forehead.
"Want me to kiss it and make it better?" Ryan said in a breathless voice. I was very surprised at what he said. I just felt myself nod in agreement silently.
Ryan smiled at me nervously as he started to lean down. I felt his soft lips on my forehead. He leaned back and started to touch my nose. He whispered softly, "How about here?"
I felt myself nod in agreement again and then Ryan's face was in front of me, giving me a light kiss on the tip of the nose. Ryan then moved his fingers on my lips.
"How about here?" Ryan was biting his lips as his thumb gently touched my lips. I nodded my head again but just as he was leaning down and we were about to engage in our first kiss, we heard the cabin door opening loudly. Ryan sat upright immediately. I sat up on the bed and leaned back on the wall just as Jack and Drake walked up to the bed.
"We're almost in New Haven Jason," Jack said worriedly. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm okay now Jack," I grinned at Ryan and winked at him. My head was hurting a little bit but Ryan managed to kiss away most of the pain. I was ignoring Jack and Drake and was just staring at Ryan.
"We'd better get ready," Ryan said as he stood up. He helped me up to my feet and the four of us went up to the deck. I was leaning against Ryan as we walked up to the deck, his arm around my waist, pulling me close to him. Maybe I died in that accident and went to heaven. I can't remember being this happy ever.
"We'll be in the other room," Jack said as I sat down on the queen-size bed. We decided to check in a bed and breakfast instead of sleeping in the yacht. "If your head aches again, just call us."
"Thanks," Jack then left Ryan and me alone in the room. Ryan locked the door before he turned off the lights. I lay back on the bed and then Ryan joined me a few seconds later.
"Hey," I whispered softly as we were both lying on our backs. "You didn't get to finish what you were doing earlier."
"Jason," I felt Ryan moving beside me and then he was on top of me. His face very close to mine as he propped himself up with his elbows. "I need to tell you something. Something really important."
"What?" I asked him as I felt my hand reached for his hair and gently stroked it.
"I like you," Ryan whispered to me as he pressed his lips very close to mine. Not really kissing me yet. "I like you a lot. I think I'm in love with you already."
"That's great," I whispered back to him. "I won't sound stupid when I say that I think I'm in love with you too." Then I felt his lips pressing against mine hungrily. His tongue gently licking my lips.
As I was kissing him, my headache was slowly going away. I didn't know if it was the medicine I took earlier or Ryan's kisses. Somehow I felt that Ryan's kisses was the culprit.
"I can't wait for the rest of my life," Ryan whispered as he pulled away from me and broke our kiss. "I have this feeling that I'm going to spend it with you."
"I won't have it no other way," I grinned at him as I pulled him down and kissed him again. And I never stopped kissing him for the rest of my life.
******** The End! ********
Note: I didn't put any sex scenes in this story. This was really a romantic story about two guys who met and fell in love but was too afraid to show it to each other. I hope that all of you would get the courage to tell that special guy in your heart how much you love him.
Any Comments are welcome at: Sliders21@iname.com