Here is part two of the story. No disclaimer since all of you should know what you want or are allowed to read. Comments and suggestions (including spelling and grammar) :-P are welcome. Thank YOU for the help in editing this chapter. :-)
Marcos
I hate you so much that I love you 2
II.
Still not thinking clearly Chris kept his position, halfway on the desk. He was in heaven; this was way too good to be true. His first kiss from a man... The sound of steps brought him back to reality. Quickly gathering his papers from the desk he left the room nodding to the group approaching on the corridor.
It seemed like an eternity to get home. The movie kept on playing in his head, on and on he was kissed by Daniel. The sensation of Daniel's lips touching his was delicious. Entering his flat Chris closed the door and leaned against it, looking through the big living room window at the distant lights of the hill. He couldn't stop thinking of the kiss, and he didn't even want to stop. The feeling he experienced that evening was too powerful, his mind wasn't functioning. He wanted to hate Daniel, he needed badly to hate him, and yes he was desperately looking for some reason. He was way too scared from these new events, he needed a good backup. Once in bed the radio was playing one of his favorite songs. It didn't take long for Chris to drift away to dreamland.
The next day he woke up early. "God, I hate him! How could he kiss me! I mean did I invite him to do that? Did I say: <Hello, step into my hell-life and kiss me and mess everything up, make me more confused, a lot more than I am now! Just take me, I'm an easy pray you know!> But the touch of his lips was just perfect... So wet and so warm... Grrr!!! Wake up you idiot, what are you doing! He wasn't allowed to kiss me! This is a clear case of sexual harassment. I should sue him..." The phone began ringing. Probably Mom Chris thought, she is the first to call me on my birthday.
"Christian Schwalm..." he said quite bored.
"Hello Christian." the voice said. "Now where do I know this voice from?" Chris thought.
"It's me, ahm, Daniel..." said a very confused voice.
"Daniel... Hello, ahm, what can I do for you?" Chris said in a very insecure tone. What was all this about?
"Well, I was wondering if you have checked your mailbox." a very shy Daniel said.
"!?!" Huh? What? Excuse me... Why? I mean, I don't understand your question!!!" Chris started raising his voice.
"Obviously not! Please go check your mailbox than, please. Bye!" Daniel hung up quickly.
Chris stared at the receiver. He couldn't believe it. What kind of sick game was this? How dared this man to intrude into his private life like this? And first of all, how did he find out where he lived? He threw on some clothes and went to the door. "And what if he wants to kill me? What if he sent me a bomb? OK, now I'm being paranoid. Maybe I should change and have some decent clothes on...Just in case, you never know... Grrr, now this is going way too far!" Chris slammed the door and went to the mailbox. It was a fresh morning, beautiful clear sky, all colors of the autumn on the trees. There were no people on the street; no wonder, it was Saturday morning. Still lost in his thoughts Chris opened the mailbox. "Is this the day I meet you God or Devil???" said Chris while opening the box. "Well, no explosion. So far so good." He thought. There were several envelopes and the newspaper. He locked the box and turned around starting to walk back to the building. No suspicious envelopes! "What the hell is this freak trying to do to me??? OK this went too far! I can't believe it!" he was showing human emotions again! He was really pissed off! He felt the need to hit something, just like a little child. He looked around frustrated and raised his hands to the sky not believing what was happening to him.
"Are you looking for any special help from above?" a voice said right behind him. Chris widened his eyes and turned with cosmic speed.
"You! How dare you! You are trying to make a fool out me!" he yelled looking straight into Daniels dark eyes and pointing to him with the package of letters.
"Hi yourself!" Daniel smiled and quickly tore the letters out of Chris' hands. And started walking backwards still turned towards Chris.
"What are you doing? Hey, give me back my letters! Where are you going?" Chris started following Daniel. By that time Daniel turned and started running.
"Come and get them!" he laughed.
"I'm goanna kill you! Now, I'm goanna sue you and then let you get killed by some perverted prisoner!" Chris yelled still not believing what was happening.
Daniel just kept on laughing and running. He turned right and disappeared. Reaching the corner Chris turned right and saw Daniels car with the passenger door opened.
"Come and get your mail angry boy!" Daniel laughed and started the engine.
"I damn sure will!" said Chris and got into the car. In that second Daniel suddenly drove off. The door closed and Daniel pushed the lock button.
"Help! Somebody help me! I mean stop the car!" Chris yelled desperately. Looking scared at Daniel.
"Relax, nothing bad is going to happen to you!" Daniel said kind of relaxed handing Chris his letters.
"Here, read these while I'm driving."
"Where are you taking me??? I want some answers! First you harass me and now you kidnap me! What's next? A brutal rape and you kill me leaving me in some deserted place so that the wild animals can eat me?" Chris said seeing all these possible with his mental eyes...
"I said relax! Nothing bad is going to happen to you! Just trust me!" Daniel said looking straight into Chris' eyes. Chris looked at him and their eyes locked. The fear disappeared from Chris' green eyes. Daniels deep brown eyes calmed him, he suddenly felt as safe as never before in his life. It was Daniel who broke the eye-contact looking back to the road. Chris looked at his letters and kept quite for the rest of the journey. He wasn't thinking he just existed. All he knew was that he was safe there with Daniel. Once again Daniel took control over him and he couldn't protest. It wasn't meant to be, there were no reasons for that. Daniel looked a couple of times at Chris, from the corner of his eyes. He felt relieved. So far so good. His plan was working.
III.
The car stopped in front of a little restaurant. Chris knew the place; it was in a village near the city, a small community. They had excellent restaurants, and this specific one was his favorite. He was just wondering how Daniel knew about the place. He couldn't have found out, there were no sources he could have used.
"Well sir, ready for breakfast?" Daniel looked at him with a big grin. Chris just nodded. Daniel opened the door and helped Chris out, who still was in a weird state. Daniel guided him into the restaurant.
"Good morning gentlemen! Hello Chris!" the waitress said.
"Hi! Have you any idea what am I doing here today?" Chris said looking at the girl. He knew her, being an old guest the whole personal knew him.
"We have a reservation for two." Daniel said quickly not allowing the girl to answer.
"Name please?" she said turning to him.
"Rodriguez."
"Yes, follow me please." Chris just did what he was told.
"By the way, nice outfit!" the waitress said giving Chris a hug and left.
That specific remark brought Chris back to reality. Flash! In the same moment the light of a camera brought him back to reality. Daniel just took a picture and smiled at him. Chris felt really angry. He looked around. He was sitting next to the window his usual place, his favorite one. This was scary. How did Daniel know all this? He turned to the boy. His green eyes were like a stormy sea.
"Happy birthday Christian!" Daniel said looking once again into the boy's eyes. He gave Chris a sexy smile. Suddenly the anger disappeared.
"How did you know?" Chris said very quietly almost whispering.
"Let's say I have my sources. But that doesn't really matter. At least not now! Let's enjoy our breakfast!"
The waitress just brought the meal. Chris was once again stunned, and Daniel knew it was time for explanations.
"Now I would like to ask you not to freak out. For the last time today. Just enjoy your meal and we'll talk later, OK?"
They ate quietly. All this was way too much for Chris. He couldn't believe it.
Half an hour later they were leaving the restaurant. It was a quiet day with not many people in the big park. It actually was a dendrological garden in the yard of an old castle. It used to be the property of some count. The castle wasn't too big, and it was in an advanced state of destruction, the state owned it, and of course there was no money for these purposes. Chris loved this place. The two young men walked in silence.
"I think I owe you some explanations. That of course if you are willing to look at me and take your eyes off of your shoes. You have been looking at them for quite some time..." Daniel said smiling. Chris blushed looking at his old running trousers and his sneakers. It was the worse outfit...
"Please..." Daniel said putting his index on Chris' chin and slowly lifting and turning his head. Touching Chris' skin made Daniel shiver, and Chris seemed to be experiencing the same.
"I'm... ahm... am really sorry, was kind of lost in my thoughts..." Chris explained.
"No apologies. I am sorry for kidnapping you like that and I thank you for trusting me." Daniel said looking into Chris' eyes.
"Well it was a bit strange, but how did you know about all this? My birthday, my favorite restaurant, my daily routine? You keep on surprising me..."
"I know, I know it wasn't the best start and I have to apologize for that too. I never meant to say those things to you on that first evening..."
"Oh yes you meant each and every word you said... And that's OK! I mean, I don't think I could pay for the damages of your car, you were and are right. It just hit me, but no big deal I'm a big boy." Chris said still looking at Daniel.
"Are you really a big boy? Cause it didn't seem that way to me..." Daniel lifted his left eyebrow giving Chris a searching look. This caused Chris to blush.
"Well, basically I am, but I have my moments, and unfortunately you have caught only these kinds of moments..."
"Not exactly. Look at you; you are acting very grown-up now! Almost too serious for my taste..." Daniel shortly looked at Chris and went on "But you had seen my bad side too and I needed to get you on neutral territory so that we can talk like normal people."
"OK, sounds fair to me, but we aren't going to say our apologies the whole day, are we? Just tell me the reason you wanted to see me..." Chris was risking way too much. Daniel looked away. Chris used the moment to check the guy out. He couldn't believe it. He was actually checking Daniel out, the guy who had insulted, harassed and kidnapped him and he couldn't help it. The boy was just too sexy. The olive color of his skin was a total turn-on for Chris. He loved Latin hunks, and this very specimen was THE hottest. He was about 10 cms taller than him, just perfect, with a well defined body. He wore a tight ocean blue shirt and black trousers, very tight around his thighs and then widening towards his feet. Daniel was still looking away and Chris admired his boyish face. It was just perfect. The lips were just like he remembered from the night before. Remembering the sensation of touching them just made hard. The wind was playing with Daniel's black locks. The Latin god seemed to take power over him. Suddenly Daniel turned.
"This isn't going to be easy for me... And I hope you'll understand. It takes a lot of courage to say it like this." Now Daniel was ready for the worse. "Whatever your reaction will be, I accept it and probably deserve it too..." He now looked into Chris' eyes.
"Christian, I..."
The sound of a cell phone stopped him. Chris quickly took his mobile out of his pocket and looked at the screen.
"Sorry about this, will you excuse me?" he said quickly and answered. "Hi Justine! Thank you baby, this is the best birthday gift I could get."
Daniel was shocked! He looked at a smiling Chris and he suddenly felt stupid. Just one sentence from another person made Chris smile and he hadn't manage to do that for how long? Almost 3 hours by now...
"Now don't torture me any longer baby! Did you get those rings? You didn't? Don't tell me we have to go there once more, there are just way too many things to do! But honey I thought that we cleared the problems with the wedding rings once and for all!" Chris went on.
Daniel felt week. Chris was getting married. He never heard him call someone baby or honey before. So this was the reason why he didn't react to his kiss the night before. He just stood there and he made a fool out of himself. This was just too much to take. He felt hurt and betrayed. He looked again at Chris, who was happily talking to his lover and didn't even notice he still was around. That hurt very much. He slowly got up, took out his mobile phone and dialed a number. He hung up and Chris was still talking. Daniel turned and started walking away. He felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Chris giving him a questioning look and saying to the girl:
"OK babe, gotta go, I need to take care of something. Call you tonight. Big kiss for you." The sound of the kiss just echoed in Daniel's head. So he is just "something" that needs to be taken care of... That is all he is to Christian...
"So, you were saying..." Chris said turning his full attention towards Daniel.
"Nothing important. Listen, I need to get back to the city... Sorry, but I guess we must leave." Daniel said not being able to look into Chris' eyes.
"Oh, sorry Daniel, I didn't mean to... Oh, you don't have to drive me back home..."
"That's OK. Come one."
The ride back seemed like an eternity. Daniel switched on the radio. Mephisto's song played:
"I will never ever fall in love with somebody else's lover,
I forgot to look in your eyes and now I have to suffer..."
He looked over and saw Chris sitting there next to him, obviously feeling uncomfortable enough. But he just couldn't help it, he was feeling to weak to say something. He needed help desperately; he couldn't be polite enough to help Chris out.
"Beautiful song." Chris broke the silence looking at Daniel.
"It is..." Daniel managed to say. Why was Chris doing this to him? This was just too much for him to handle. His eyes got wet and he saw Chris' reaction. The boy's face turned serious and he was looking straight at Daniel.
"Daniel, is there something wrong?" he asked warmly. Daniel shivered inside. He felt warmth in Chris' voice, a warmth that made him go crazy, but a voice that never will mean those words the way he wished it would.
"It's just the air conditioning..." he lied quietly gathering his strength not to cry.
They finally arrived at Chris' apartment. He stopped the car and kept on looking straight ahead. Chris finally spoke:
"Well, Daniel thanks for this beautiful present! You made my birthday very special!" Don't go there, Daniel thought, please don't! "And you're a nice guy, and please forgive me for acting the way I did." Just go now, I can't hold it back any longer... Please leave Daniel fought. "Uhm, maybe we can get together some time, I'll invite you..." Yeah, some time, and get together... Small talk... "OK, see you on Monday then. Have a pleasant weekend Daniel!"
Daniel just nodded. Chris was very confused. He got out of the car and looked back again at Daniel. His eyes were still searching for some reaction. There was nothing. Daniel just kept on staring straight ahead. He slowly shut the door and started walking towards the house. He didn't look back, he was too confused. What happened to this guy? Suddenly he became so serious and distant. What was wrong with him? Why did he take him out like that just to leave him again like this. It was just like last night, he played with him. "He is playing with me!" Chris suddenly realized. God, this idea never occurred to him. Once again he was in his flat with his back on the door, staring at the hill through the window. "It was just a game for him... I am a game for him! How could he do this to me? Just as I started liking him...No, I'm the one to blame! I should have taken all precautions to avoid this!" Chris sat on the floor. He was devastated... At least ten minutes must have passed since he was in his flat. The scenes of the last 24 hours played in his head, fragments of the conversation, Daniel's voice, the intense feeling of safety Daniel gave him just with his look... "I need to move on! Just delete Daniel!" He stood and went to the answering machine. He pushed the play button casually and set on the couch. The message started:
There was background noise, and he could recognize his own voice. A cold shiver went through his body. Then someone spoke: "Hi Christian, this is Daniel. You are just talking yourself and I decided to tell you what I started to say, because obviously the direct confrontation would have been too uncomfortable for you." A very hurt Daniel continued: "As I said, this isn't easy for me, but I need to tell you the truth. It's funny, a few minutes ago I was quite excited knowing that I have at least a 50% chance. Now I know this isn't real. Christian, the reason I wanted to talk to you, the reason I took you out is to say, that... that... I'm madly in love with you... That is why I kissed you...Today I was wondering if it was shock that stopped you from kissing back... Now I know it's your girlfriend. I have the evidence, you are talking to her now, and... Well, that is all. Please forgive me for not having told you this personally, but I feel to weak." The message ended. Chris stood in the same second. He got the picture, everything fit perfectly into the picture. The way Daniel was acting, the call, the song in the car and Daniel's tears. He ran trough the door, down the stairs as fast as he could. He couldn't believe his eyes. Daniel's car was still there, with the engine running. Chris reached the car in a second and opened the passenger door. Daniel's head was on the steering wheel, buried in his arms. Chris got into the car and closed the door. He turned the key and removed it. He was aching inside seeing Daniel like that. He never imagined he could feel like that for someone, whom he hated just a couple of hours ago. He gently touched Daniel's arm.
"Daniel, please look at me!" he said very softly.
The boy didn't move.
"Daniel, please..." No move. Tears were rolling down on Chris' cheeks. He leaned over and gently hugged Daniel. This was too much for Daniel, his body started shivering and obvious signs of his crying were visible. Chris held him stronger.
"Shh, don't cry Daniel! Please Dani, don't cry... I love you so much..." he couldn't believe what he was saying. At that moment there was no turning back. But a turning back wasn't necessary at all. He just knew he loved the crying beauty.
Daniel moved and Chris faced him.
"If you hate me now, go ahead, just tell me! I know the truth, and forgive me for being such a coward. I hope you won't reject me totally and will be able to look me into the eye." That was too much for Chris. He felt a strange need to kiss the boy. Everything came so naturally, all his doubts about recognizing the right time were now gone. He slowly moved towards Daniel closing his eyes.
"Please don't!" Daniel turned away. That hit Chris, he opened his eyes and looked at Daniel.
"What is it? What is wrong with you? Why don't you want me to kiss you?" Chris asked with a hurt tone.
"Don't play with me Christian. I have strong feelings for you and you are already taken, and we both know we are fighting on opposite fronts, so there is no need to give me false hopes. I know, you mean well, but instead of helping me you would hurt me more with a kiss, a kiss that would be the last. Cause I'm never ever goanna have you..." Daniel said with a weak voice. A quick smile appeared on Chris' lips. Daniel saw it and felt even more hurt. He was just about to say something as Chris took his beautiful face into his hands. The first reaction of Daniel was fear, he shook a bit not knowing where this physical contact is heading to. Chris looked straight into Daniels eyes.
"Enough of this. Come with me." And he turned.
"Where do you want me to go?"
"This time YOU are the one who should trust me. Let's play the game this way now..." said Chris smiling at the confused Latin guy.
Daniel forced a weak smile and followed Chris. On the way to the flat Chris kept staring at Daniel. He enjoyed the view. He just loved to see this dream boy so confused. It didn't take a scientist to figure out that this situation was pretty embarrassing for Daniel. Macho-like guys never lose control. Well this time it was different. The self confident guy who kidnapped Chris in the morning was now leaded into an insecure place by his former "victim". Chris found himself enjoying this situation. They entered the flat. Chris didn't get to the point, he was making some small talk.
"This is my home... Not too big but just enough for me. Make yourself comfortable. Can I get you something?" said Chris checking on Daniel's reactions from the corner of his eye. The boy was feeling obviously uncomfortable.
"Nothing thank you. Nice flat you have... Ahm, would you, I mean could you, ahm, tell me what this is about?" Daniel asked kind of insecure looking straight at his shoes. He was very sure of what was going to be said.
"Maybe you should have something to drink... This will take a bit longer..." A quiet sigh, this was just so well known for Daniel. He sat on the couch looking through the big window. He was lost and felt like loosing the most precious thing he ever had. It was too funny, he actually had Chris for one kiss, but yet he was feeling like a part of Chris' life and Chris seemed to be a living part of his own being. Lost in thoughts he didn't realize the time pass. It must have been at least 10 minutes of silent sitting on the couch. He suddenly realized his state and that Chris wasn't there. He felt strange, that weird feeling of being watched. He slowly turned around. The view was spectacular. Chris was leaning against the door in a very sexy pose. With his hand crossed, wearing tight brown jeans and a green shirt he was just perfect. His eyes glanced and the shirt just matched his eyes. Although his muscles weren't as well defined as Daniel's he still was a sexy view. He was spectacular and just perfect. There was a mixture of self-confidence in his eyes.
"Wow! I mean, sorry, but you look so good." Daniel commented.
"I hope so! I need to look good now. Now let's talk." The cold shower for Daniel. This guy just made him crazy. Why was he playing his little game? Why did he reject him? And why all this now? Why this sexy look just to say to him "Sorry, but I'm straight, and there is no room in my life for you. But we still can be friends, if you want to..." The same old story. Daniel remembered his one night stands, all of them ending with some excuse. He was a boy-toy, a good fuck but nothing more. Nobody really liked him or wanted him. He often thought about this fact. What has what rejected all these guys? He had everything a guy needed and could possibly offer.
"Are you going to do something or are you going to stay there and stare?" Chris stood right in front of him and was looking into Daniel's eyes.
"Sorry, I was lost in thoughts. I kind of know what is coming now, and I was just..." Chris interrupted the guy:
"Oh really? What makes you think you can read my mind? What do I want to tell you?" said Chris raising an eyebrow.
"Don't do this to me, please. You won, OK? The cards are in your hands now and you can use this info the way you want to. I am gay and you can tell the whole campus. And to tell you the truth I can understand it perfectly if you are up to do that. I was a jerk and I deserve this..."
"And?" Chris said softly still with a raised eyebrow but with a sexy smile on his lips...
"God, you really enjoy this! I don't think we can be friends, I can't come over these feelings for you and each and every time I would have to accept the fact that you belong to someone else. I'm afraid I'm not that good in repressing my feelings and I might bring myself into some pretty embarrassing situations because of this." He broke the eye contact. This was just too much for him. He turned away trying to fight back his tears. "So, I guess the best thing to do is to avoid every kind of contact. It would be the wisest thing to do..."
"So... that kiss... and the kidnapping today... it was just a joke for you..." Chris was now playing with fire, but it was just to tempting not to do that. This was his only chance of finding out how deep the boy's feelings were for him. And he was decided to find it out.
"How can you say that! Oh God, just let me leave! You are playing with me, and you are playing a cruel game! Daniel wanted to leave but Chris cut his way.
"Yes, I am playing a tough game! But there is a reason for that!"
"Oh really? What reason? A little gay experience before your wedding so that you can check off this point on your list? Guess what, I'm not up to such an experience. I'm not going to be used anymore!"
"Which wedding?" Chris said sounding very indifferent.
"YOUR wedding with YOUR girlfriend, with your babe, honey or however you call her! I'm not going to continue this conversation! Let me leave!!!"
"Oh no! You are so going to stay here! Because there is no wedding! And there is no girlfriend! There is a good female friend, yes I call her babe and honey but that's all. Maybe you should ask before becoming so radical handsome boy!" Daniel lifted his head. He couldn't believe it! He was looking at Chris. He was smiling at the shocked boy. He put his hand on his hips.
"Well? Are you going to do something?" That was just too much. Daniel made a firm step and took Chris in his arms holding him very close. Chris was just beautiful. His sparkling eyes, the smell of his cologne and the warmth of his body were too much for Daniel. He slowly put his lips on Chris' never loosing eye contact with his love. Their lips met and Chris gave in letting Daniel's tongue explore his mouth. In his inexperienced way he was trying to do the same. This made Daniel giggle.
"What is so funny?" Chris asked seriously.
"The way you kiss... Tell me this is your first kiss!" Daniel searched his love's eyes.
"Well, my first French kiss ever!"
"Oh God, you are just perfect!" with that Daniel kissed his love passionately again. Both boys were in Heaven. For Chris this was the first kiss. He felt himself special, and Daniel's arms were holding him so close. This was what he has been longing for, for such a long time. For Daniel it was the pure victory. "Thank you God! I guess we do have a secret pact. I promise I won't let this chance go by..." the Latin boy thought. They broke their kiss.
"I love you so much Christian! My little Chris... I finally can hold you!"
"I love you too! Don't ask me why and how, I just know that I love you very much." They were still standing in the middle of the living room.
"There is something else I want to tell you." Daniel tried to speak.
"Shh, enough speaking for today. Just hold me, you don't need to tell me anything." He took his love by his hand and led him to the couch. Daniel laid on the couch pulling Chris with him. With his head on Daniel's chest Chris felt once again very safe and loved. He was gently playing with his love's fingers. It was the best feeling he ever could have experienced. It didn't take too long for him to fall asleep. There was the time of eternity to talk. He needed to feel his first lover, and words just couldn't replace these feelings he was experiencing. Daniel just looked at his sleeping beauty. He just couldn't believe it. The boy of his dreams was in his arms. Tears were rolling down his cheeks. He never experienced something similar. He just knew his time has come. He finally knew exactly what and who he was and how he wanted to spend his life. All his answers were there, lying on his body breathing calmly filling him with warmth and love.
To be continued
Is this way too wicked, slow, boring for you? Looking forward for your comment: tulindobebito@yahoo.es