Home Is In Your Arms By James
Disclaimer
This is a story which deals with sexual as well as romantic situations between teenaged males. Should you be offended by such material, or if it's illegal to read this type of material in your location, please find something else to read. I can be contacted at jamesheady1985@gmail.com for those who want to talk about anything related to the story. Finally, please remember to donate to Nifty, as it keeps these stories and related materials free to the public.
Home Is In Your Arms
Chapter 5
Milen
After visiting with my parents and sister, Kyley and I went to my room to hang for a bit. Once situated on my bed and with some music going in the background, we sat talking.
He told me about how things were going up at the center since I had been up there on Wednesday, and I told him about how things were going here. As we talked, he moved closer to me so that we were sitting as close to one another as we had been when in the weight room when we first met. As I finished talking, his hand was holding mine by this point, and I was noticing the feel of it.
His hand was soft and plump, and it was also warm. I was starting to awaken down there, and I hoped he wouldn't notice. I was rather large for my age at that point, and I was still at that age where I worried about people seeing me hard even though I was sitting down and didn't have my legs spread at that point.
"What all did you want to do this weekend?" Kyley asked as he took his hand out of mine and put the arm attached to that hand around me.
He moved so that no space was between us, and he was lightly pressed against me as we sat there.
"I didn't have anything planned, at least not right down to the last detail," I said. "Do you have any specific thing you'd like to do while you're here this weekend?"
"I'm willing to go along with whatever you want to do," he replied. "I'll let you know if I'm uncomfortable though."
"I'll do the same," I answered.
Alex came over an hour before dinner, and given the closeness of the timing, my mom asked, but more like insisted that he stay for dinner. Karl was working late so there wasn't any real reason for him to not stay. I was glad he'd be staying, and once he said he would, I heard him nearing my room. Kyley and I were in the middle of posting comments on a couple of songs we found on YouTube that were in the Pop Genre. They definitely weren't favorable comments.
I was just posting a comment on the song titled Hi Bitch by the rapper Bad Baby, the one girl who was on Dr. Phil back a couple of years ago.
"That's what they consider popular today?" Kyley asked as the song finished. "She has so much fucking auto tune that she sounds like she's swallowed about 90 drunk cats and they're trapped in her throat!"
I had taken a drink of my water at that point, and as I laughed and began choking, I was trying to keep it from coming out of my nose. I was able to swallow, but some still went down the wrong way.
"Looks like it's time for a trip to the ER," Alex said from the door.
I recovered slightly and motioned for him to come in.
"That's not a good idea while I have food or drink in my mouth," I said turning to Kyley and still laughing.
He was laughing too, and then he stood up after grabbing his device. We went over to Alex who sat in the chair by the bed. I introduced him and Kyley, and they shook hands.
"I'm glad to finally meet you," Alex said. "Milen hasn't stopped talking about you since he's met you."
"I'm hoping that he had good things to say about me," Kyley said smiling and turning his head in my direction.
"Definitely," Alex replied.
Once seated again, we listened as Alex talked about how things were going. When I asked him about Karl, he said that he was busy, but beyond that he said nothing further at the moment.
He then asked Kyley what all music he enjoyed, and he told him. I was interested when Kyley mentioned his love for Celtic Music, as I really enjoyed it as well. Then he showed Alex our comments on Bad Baby.
"If you look up her song titled Dese Hoes," Alex began. "you'll have more reasons to leave her comments about the song. It's total Bullshit, and you're not missing much."
"I'll keep that in mind," I said.
"Thanks for the tip," Kyley responded.
"No problem," Alex said.
We had dinner and continued talking, then after Alex left and my mom and dad settled in the living room to watch the news, Elena went to visit one of her friends, and so Kyley and I returned to my room, and as I closed the door so we could have some alone time, he turned to me and held out his arms. I took him gently in to my arms and he wrapped his arms around my neck tightly and we stood like that for a long time. His head was resting against my chest and I had my nose pressed to his hair breathing in its sweet smell. I rubbed his back up and down as well, and I felt myself growing hard once again. I could feel Kyley going through the same process, and he moved a little so that his hardness wouldn't push against mine.
While he repositioned himself, I thought of complex Math Problems to keep myself from getting all the way hard, and surprisingly it worked.
We separated after another moment and went to sit on my bed.
"I was wondering where you would like to sleep while you're here this weekend," I said as I put my arm around him.
"I was hoping I could sleep in here with you," he replied looking at me hopefully.
"I'd really like that," I answered and stroked his hair for a moment.
"So would I," he said smiling.
I then thought of our shower, and then thought of the bathroom I had attached to my room. I also thought about the showering situation.
"Oh shit, and that reminds me," I began. "I just realized that we don't have a shower like you have at the center. I mean, that we have both just regular bath tubs here, so I'll have to ask my mom and dad how we would deal with this."
"Would you feel comfortable helping me in to the tub, then helping me out again?" Kyley asked. "I could do the rest when it comes to washing myself."
"Yeah, that could work," I responded.
"Cool, problem solved," he said and then surprised me by resting his head on my shoulder.
I took him in my arms and just held him like that for a long time.
0000
Nathan Evans
I stood there looking at the letter as I put it in the out-going mail slot, then returned to my room. As I walked down the white hallway, I saw all of the hall including the floor and walls harshly lit in the utilitarian florescent lighting. I had been at the place for almost four months by this time, and I was already more exhausted than I had ever thought I could be.
Once back in my room, I fell on my bed and as I lay there, I thought again of Milen. Guilt began taking hold of me once again, and I thought about how I had treated him, and felt close to tears again. It wasn't supposed to have turned out the way it had. I thought of how it had all turned out, and I wished at that moment that I could call him and explain everything. Explain how while my family tried to show themselves to be LGBT-friendly to everyone else, their image of being loving towards the LGBT Community and by implication to me, was just that an image that disguised what was really going on. Then also explain to Milen about how I truly did value our friendship, and that even though nothing happened between us, that the times we did hang out with one another really did mean more to me than anything.
When he and I would spend time together, it really was amazing. He treated me like I was truly the only one around, and he focused all his attention on me, and on everything I was saying. That was a stark contrast from my dad, mom and sister who would listen, but focus more on other things they had going on. Milen didn't treat me like that though, and I could have seen myself falling deeply in love with him, but I was too afraid to open up to him about what was going on, so when he and I started talking about our LGBT situations, he had asked how well my family accepted me. I knew that he already assumed that they were accepting of me completely, and I didn't say much if anything to make him think otherwise. It was the fact that they would tell others about how loving they were towards people who are LGBT and to me, then when behind closed doors they would constantly tell me to be careful about who I tell about my orientation, and that I wouldn't want to end up with some homophobe beating me up or doing worse. They'd go on to say that they didn't have a problem with me being ay, but that I still had to be careful. Add in the long list of relatives I couldn't tell, as well as the annoyed look on my sister's face when I would talk about boys I thought were attractive, then that made me question even more if they were truly accepting of me.
After my family moved away, I told Milen that we were moving because of my dad's new job. I knew he knew that there was more to the story, but I didn't confirm anything. While my dad did get a new job, he and my mom did talk a little too happily about how the town we would be moving to was a town where things were more old-fashion, and that most progressive ideas weren't really well-liked there. Then a couple of days before we moved, my dad told me that I should watch who I tell about my being gay since the school I'd be going to wasn't well-known for accepting people who are LGBT.
"Plus I don't have time to be getting called out of work like at your old school to deal with you getting in to one of your countless fights, because of what some idiot said to you," he went on. "You're going to have to learn how to stand up to these creeps, but then again if you'd stop advertising so much that you're obsessed with boys, then maybe these kids wouldn't be so ready all the time to kick your ass to Hell and back."
"All we asked is that you be careful about who you tell about yourself," my mom lectured as I tried to gag down the last of my dinner on the night when this particular conversation had occurred.
It was becoming more and more clear that they were moving away to keep me away from Milen and any other boys that I was interested in. I wondered if they'd start going to church, and if it would be one of those churches where the preacher would be screaming about the evils of homosexuality on every Sunday.
Once in to the second month in our new town, I thought I had met someone I could be friends with, and maybe more. His name was Rick, and he was a senior at the new school. I would see him around the halls the first month I was there at the new school, and by the time November came around we were sitting at lunch together. He was also giving me looks that suggested that he was interested in me as more than a friend, and by the time December came around I admitted to him that I was gay and liked him. He smiled and said that we could give it a try. I was figuring that he was gay since he never was seen around the halls with a girl on his arm, but he wasn't talking too much about guys he would date either so that eased me in to what I now knew as a false sense of security that I knew him.
By the middle of December when we were deep in to our relationship if you could even call it that, Rick and I stayed over at his house and that's when I started experiencing his abusive side. He would make sarcastic comments about my appearance, make jokes about what he believed to be a lack of intelligence on my part and also ask me with a smirk when I was going to let him open up my flower. When I looked at him confused and asked what he was talking about, he laughed and said that he was talking about when I was going to let him fuck me.
I wasn't ready for anything like that, and he laughed and joked that I sure was acting like a real pussy. We did get time alone some of the time to make out, and I was starting to not really enjoy it. He was rather aggressive to begin with, then he would always put his hand between my legs, and I'd push it away. On the second time of me pushing his hand away the second time of us being alone together and making out, he broke the kiss and said I needed to let him have his way with me eventually.
Finally on the second weekend of me staying at his house, I got there Friday and that night he asked if I would suck him off. His parents weren't going to be home that weekend, and mine were at home all weekend so that's why I was at his house, and at this point I was starting to get more nervous and even a little afraid of being alone with him.
When I went down on him, he was rather aggressive, and I gagged a few times as he would push himself in, then when I would gag, he'd laugh, then just say that I had to learn how to take it like a man.
Then when he'd say something that would hurt my feelings or make me angry over that weekend, he would slap me when I would tell him to stop with what he was saying. He also started making comments about what happened between Milen and I. I had told him about that when we were getting to know one another, and it was becoming all too clear at that moment that I shouldn't have said anything.. Mostly though he would make comments about how it's no wonder things didn't work out between Milen and I. He would say this when I would say that I didn't want to do something he wanted to do, and when he said stuff like that more and more as the weekend went on, I was finding that it hurt as much as it had when he first started saying anything about it.
Finally that weekend was over and I went back to my parents' house. Everything came to a head though in late December when I ended things with Rick. During the early weeks of December, Rick and I spent the weekends at his house, and on the third weekend of December and I was there with him, he kept nagging me until I agreed that he could go all the way with me that night. I was nervous and when he pushed in to me and began moving in and out, it hurt a lot and after it was over and I saw that I was bleeding a bit, he joked that I must have secretly liked it otherwise I wouldn't be getting as upset as I was.
"Rick that fucking hurt!" I yelled as I wiped away the blood. "What the fuck is wrong with you!"
He slapped me across the face.
"Shut up," he said. "You're with me, and you're supposed to be giving me sex whenever I want it."
The rest of that weekend was spent with him making me give him several blow jobs, and he was rough like usual, then as Sunday came around I had had enough and told him that I was finished with him.
"Fine Bitch," he said smirking at me as I opened the door to leave. "Wait until you see what I'll be getting you for Christmas."
"Fuck you!" I yelled as I slammed the door.
I didn't know what he meant by that final comment, and I didn't really care at that point. I'd find out at the end of December though.
Christmas came and went, and I tried to get through it. Finally at the end of December as my mom and dad got home from work on New Year's Eve, there was a knock on the door just as dinner was finishing up. My dad went to answer it, and I was shocked and a little scared to hear Rick's voice. There was several minutes of silence, then the door closed and my dad came back in to the room. His eyes were flashing with rage, and his mouth was closed tightly. I knew that something had happened, and I was afraid at that point.
"That was Rick," my dad began. "He stopped by to tell me something about you."
"What?" I asked.
He looked even more angry at this point, and I tried to prepare myself for whatever was coming.
"Rick says that you've been causing problems for him," my dad went on. "He also says that you've been going after him sexually."
"What!" I yelled jumping up out of my chair. "I went after him? What do you mean!"
"Sit the fuck down!" my dad yelled back. "He said that you've been forcing him to have sex with you, and that you might have given him an STD or something like that. Something about a rash he found near his junk or something like that. If that's true, then I wonder who you've been fucking that we don't know about. He thinks he got it from you, which would imply that you've been with other boys and that wouldn't surprise me to learn that you have."
"No!" I yelled close to tears. "He's been making me do things with him! He was the one who made me start giving him sex when I didn't want to do it! Please! You have to believe me!"
"I can't take this shit with you anymore Nathan," my mom said disgustedly.
"But it's not like that!" I yelled as I started crying.
"Tomorrow morning we're going to Dr. Smith," my dad said. "I'm getting you tested to make sure you don't have anything, and after that you'll be staying here at home. You won't have access to your computer or anything else, and once school begins in a couple of days you'll go to school, then back home. No other place. I'm sick of you doing things to try and tarnish the image of our family! This is ridiculous!"
"I didn't do anything!" I yelled louder this time. "He made me have sex with him! I didn't want to do it!"
"Shut up and go to your room!" my mom yelled.
Nothing was found from the tests, and I was glad of that, but things were continuing to get worse at home. Finally in the end of January, I came home to find my mom and dad sitting at the kitchen table with several papers and a couple of green notebooks on the table in front of them. I felt my stomach tighten up with fear. The green notebooks were my journals, and the papers that were spread out were of rather personal drawings I would draw of boys I liked. Most of the boys in the drawings were pictured in rather sexual poses to say the least.
For the next hour it was nothing but torture with my dad reading certain portions of my journals, and it was the experience that most would probably need therapy for, for the rest of their lives if they experienced it for themselves.
"My god Nathan," he said as he got to a passage about one of the boys in my class at the current school I was attending at that point. "Is this true what you wrote here? Here you said that you'd like to get his clothes off and kiss him all over his body then drink him down!"
"How did you find those?" I asked as I felt my cheeks burning, and my bladder feel like it would go at any moment.
"I went through your room earlier today," my mom said. "I wanted to see if there was anything else we needed to know since we had to find out the hard way from Rick that you're a sexual pervert. Being gay is one thing I guess, but you forced that nice boy to do things he didn't want to do. Something has to be done about this."
"I agree," my dad responded.
I went off to my room, and that up-coming week my dad sat me down and said that I was going to be going to a place called Sunny Fields Institute. He went on to explain that it was a place that could help me with not being gay, and that they could help me with becoming straight. I told him that I didn't need any sort of place like that, and we argued for almost an hour, then he slammed his fist down on the table and screamed that I would be going at the beginning of the following week, and that was that.
They took me there as he said they would, and for the last four months I was here at the place getting so-called counseling sessions where the counselors would remind me about how God's will was for men to like women and that being gay was against God's Laws. We also had group therapy sessions where kids mostly made shit up about how their parents mostly their dad's molested them when they were small children, and that they understood that this was why they were gay. I held out for a long time, and when I told them about what Rick had done to me they said that they already knew about it from what my parents had told them, but that they told them that it was I who had forced him. The staff wouldn't listen when I tried to tell them that it was the other way around and so I stopped trying to tell them the truth.
As the days went by, I would write letters to my parents letting them know that things were going well. I was trying to do what I could to get through the program. The rules were that the quicker you fell in line, the faster you would be able to go home. I hoped that I could get through it quickly so that I could get back home, but more than that I hoped that I could get out of my home life once back with my parents. I had decided while at the center I was at that once I got back home I was going to find out what I needed to do to get put with another family. I saw as the weeks turned in to a month, then in to two months that my parents truly didn't love me nor did they want me. I had always known deep down that they resented me, and that they really didn't even want me. They treated my sister like she was the one they wanted, and at this point I hated all of them! I was done trying to pretend that things would get better between us all!
As I lay there letting myself return out of my thoughts, I thought once again about Milen. I started crying, and I was wishing once again not for the first time that I wish I could have one more chance to make things right with him!
0000
Milen
Kyley held on to my arm as I walked with him in to the restroom and to the tub. We had talked once it got closer to the time for us to get our showers, and he agreed that we could shower at the same time so that I could be there for him to hold on to when getting himself clean until we could get a chair placed in there that he could use.
I started the water and removed my towel, Kyley removed his towel and we both stood there naked around one another for the first time. I was trying and failing badly at keeping my eyes off of Kyley's body. I at least tried to not be so obvious, but Kyley was looking my body up and down freely, though he was trying to be low-key about it. I smiled at him letting him know that it was alright. I helped him in to the bath tub, and I got in then we showered. It was quick, and once we dried off, we went back to the bedroom and after we were dressed again, we lay beside one another on the bed and just enjoyed the silence and also just enjoyed us being around one another.
After we listened to some music and talked for a bit, I saw Kyley's eyelids growing heavy. I leaned close to him and stroked his hair.
"Are you tired now?" I asked.
"I'm starting to get there," he replied. "Would you like to massage me before we go to bed? I'll show you what to do."
"I'd like that," I answered.
After saying good night to my family, we returned to my room and I turned out the light save for the bedside lamp that lit the room warmly.
Once back on the bed, Kyley showed me how to massage him, and so I did. I massaged and rubbed his thighs, down his legs, then I got to his feet where I pressed gently and massaged until the muscles were loosened. I then rubbed his back for a bit which was something he didn't know I was going to do, and he gave a sound of surprise and of happiness. When I moved to stop to see if he was alright with it, he looked back at me letting me know to continue. I did so for a long time, and he was basically asleep by the time I finished.
I got in to bed and pulled the covers up over both of us, then I shut out the light. I expected Kyley to fall asleep, but he motioned for his machine. I gave it to him, and waited while he typed.
"That felt really good when you were massaging me tonight," he began. "Also, it was really nice showering with you. I'm guessing you've never showered with another boy, at least not one-on-one like that, and that you've showered around other boys only when finishing up Gym Class."
"You're right," I said. "I enjoyed showering with you as well. Even when we get the shower set up for you in the way you need it, I hope we can still shower together."
"I'd really like that too!" he replied smiling. "I want to be open with you about anything and everything, and obviously we'll let one another know if there's anything we don't want to be open about though."
"I feel the same way," I answered. "I want you and I to have that kind of friendship where we can tell each other anything, and ask one another anything. I want us to be as close as two best friends can be. I've always wanted that with a friend."
"As I've been away from my old foster family," Kyley said. "I'm discovering every day that I want that as well. I've always wished for a friend who I could be close with, but I got to a point in the last few months of living with my former family where I started losing hope that I'd find something like that."
"That must have been really hard for you," I said putting my arm around him."
"It was," he agreed. "I'm just glad that I know you now, and I'm coming to trust you more and more every day."
"I'm coming to trust you even more as the days go by as well," I answered.
"You're really becoming my best friend Milen," Kyley said as he rested his head on my shoulder. "I want you to know that."
"You're becoming mine as well," I replied. "I'll always be here for you, and will always protect you."
"The same goes for you as well," he said.
After he let me know that he wanted to get to sleep, I took his machine when he held it out, and after sitting it on the bedside table I pulled up the covers over both of us. He snuggled immediately in to my arms as if he was only waiting for the chance to do so all along, and as I wrapped my arms around him, he fell asleep quickly. I lay there holding him; we were dressed just in boxers so I was able to feel his warm and silky skin against mine, and I was falling more and more in love with how his body felt pressed against mine!
Soon though I felt myself drifting off, and my last thought as I felt sleep over-take me, was how I was feeling myself falling deeper and deeper for Kyley. I hoped we could be together as boyfriends soon, and be like that forever! Sleep over-took me at that point and it was a nice thought to fall asleep to!
Author's Notes
Some of you might be surprised to see Nathan make an appearance, and some of you might not be. I thought for a long time how I wanted to introduce Nathan to the story, and I even thought about if I actually wanted him playing a part in this story at all. I discovered as I thought more about it that I wanted him in the story. I'll say right here and now so that it doesn't keep coming up at any point that I won't be doing any storylines where things become little more than a love triangle between Milen, Kyley and Nathan, nor are there going to be any storylines where Nathan tries to come between Milen and Kyley. People have Days of Our Lives if they want storylines like that. Nothing against that show, as I've been a long-time follower of it for years myself, but that's also my point. I don't want to do one more love triangle, nor do I want to do one more story of two people being in love with one person. That's been done by other writers be it writers of books, television or other media, and I figure I'd leave that up to them.
My including Nathan in this story is to show the usual truths I've been writing about since the beginning such as the problems we in the LGBT Community have to face, as well as what the youth among our community have to face from time to time. I also believe that people should have a second chance, and I've written about this in various other stories here on the site, so I wanted to communicate my belief in redemption here in this story as well.
All that being said, I hope you like Nathan as a new character, and I hope you guys enjoy where I go with his part in the story. Everyone have a good evening, and I'll see you all in Chapter Six.