The Michael Arram stories are now beginning to appear together at: http://www.iomfats.org/storyshelf/hosted/arram
This story contains graphic depictions of sex between young males. If the reading or possessing of such material as this is illegal in your place of residence please leave this site immediately and do not proceed further. If you are under the legal age to read this, please do not do so.
XVIII
So Christmas holidays came all too rapidly. Henry was unpacking his locker again, and about to say goodbye to Ed. But at least he would see him the week after Christmas, when Ed had petitioned -- in fact demanded -- that Matt and Andy take him with them to the Rothenian Alps. Rudi had likewise demanded of the parents of his growing number of straight friends at Medwardine -- including Mark Peters -- that they join him for his winter stay at the castle of Zenden south of the capital. David, though not straight, was one of this group too, and his attendance was particularly required in Rothenia as he was Rudi's study buddy for their business studies course work. As usual, Mum and Dad were joining the grandparents somewhere sunny in the week after Christmas, so it was all working out nicely.
The grand finale for them all would be Rudi's New Year's Ball in the capital. The monarchy was living up to the people's hopes of providing a focus for the nation's social as well as political life, and Oskar had drafted a regular programme of major events and levees which would form a stable social calendar for the nation and not disrupt the young king's education too badly. An ornate invitation card, gold embossed, from HM the King of Rothenia to Henry Robert Atwood Esq OHL, was jammed in the edge of the hall mirror at home, so that visiting parishioners could admire it.
It was a nice Christmas, and Ricky, Henry's brother, was in a really good mood, as he was reunited with his girlfriend, Helen Peters. Henry could hear the consequences of it if he paused outside Ricky's door and Helen was sleeping over. It has to be said that Henry, in his curiosity about the heterosexual urges he did not possess lingered a little more than was healthy outside Ricky's door straining to catch the groans and squeals. He sneaked off, ashamed of himself, in the end.
Henry's Dad celebrated five services in different churches on Christmas Day, and was lying unconscious on the sofa in the lounge in late afternoon. Henry was going through his university options with Mum, and she agreed with him that Cranwell was the best of the bunch. The finances did not look good. Between them Mum and Dad earned enough to reduce the level of maintenance grant he could hope for, but not enough to offer much support, and during his first year Ricky would still be in his final year at Manchester.
Face it,' said Mum, we timed you two really badly. But you are at least going to get some sort of rebate on your fees if you get the grades you expect, and Cranwell does offer the best deal.'
`Cranwell McDonalds it is then,' sighed Henry.
I'm sorry Henry,' Mum said sadly, but when you were born university fees were not something we expected to have to pay, or we would have tried to save for them. But your university career isn't going to be as carefree as ours was in the eighties.'
Henry hugged his Mum, `I wasn't criticising, honest. I shall put my shoulders to the wheel. I want to do university and it'll pay off in the end.'
But Mum was not happy, and indeed a little resentful at other's luck, `And it looks like Edward will be enjoying a very different university career, with Peacher money behind him, and the high table of Trinity in front of him. Yet you don't seem envious, darling. That says a lot about you.'
`It's the fact that we'll be in two different universities that bothers me most. Ours is such a staccato relationship ... on and off all the time. I'd hoped that cohabiting at university would be the chance we would have to find out how compatible we really are.'
Mum gave him a narrow look. `That sounds almost as if you had some doubts.'
Henry sighed once again. `Not about him, Mum. It's me that is the bother. I've not been a good boy. I played around with David Skipper, who I fancied a bit, and I wonder if I can live up to the standards that Ed expects of me. If we're two hundred miles apart, the possibilities of drifting away from each other are multiplied. I don't think I'm good with temptation. If I have an itch I need to scratch it.'
Mum gave Henry a calculating look. `Then maybe you just have to give each other time to grow a little. Coming out so young has forced you two to be more mature than your years might allow. Maybe in this case separation might be better. You both need space to grow. And, yes, I can see the guilt building up in you Henry, because you two may have had a rough time, but you are both loving boys and have learned a lot more about love than most people your age. The point is that you just haven't had a chance to learn how exceptional your experiences have been.'
Henry laughed, `It makes me think about poor Fritzy. He's on his third girlfriend now, and he's only fourteen. All his little affairs seem to go wrong, like clockwork. But I see what you mean. By the time he's my age, he'll have more experience of relationships to draw on, and know better how to value them when they go right. Is that what you mean?'
`Something like that, although it's complicated by you being gay, poor Henry. Life will never be easy for you.'
`So it's to be Cranwell for you is it?' Matt White was smiling very indulgently at Henry.
`Looks like, Matt,' Henry nodded.
`Good old Finkle Road, how I miss it,' Matt's smile widened.
`Seriously?'
`Well, yes. It may look like a row of crummy terraces to you, but for me it represented my discovery of life. Finkle Road to me was what the Beagle was to Charles Darwin, where I really began.'
`That's an interesting way of putting it. I hope it works out like that for me.'
`University is about all sorts of education, little Henry, not just academic. Cranwell was very good for me. I still go down there from time to time, I'm a research fellow of the history department. Also my dad still owns 25 Finkle Road, where I lived when I was a student. That's what I want to talk to you about. One of the flats there falls vacant next year, my dad says you can have it rent free if you'll take over the duty of maintaining the house ... changing light bulbs and weeding the garden sort of thing.'
`Seriously?'
`Seriously. You'll miss out on life in hall, but hall's a mixed blessing. You're a confident, pleasant and funny kid. You'll make lots of friends without the hall experience.'
`Matt ... that's brilliant. It'll help no end.'
`Thought so. Good. It's settled then. But I do have an ulterior motive. Dad has deliberately emptied the house and we're carefully refilling it for a reason.'
Henry was intrigued, `And what would that reason be?'
`Have you ever met Andy's youngest brother, Eddie?'
`Yeah ... last new year at your house.'
`Oh yes, I remember. How did you get on?'
`OK ... he's very dry and American. We had a good couple of days. What's this about?'
`Andy's father, the great Richard Peacher, is moving back to the UK, which is bad news for the Republican party. He fell out with the President over his middle eastern policies. He's bought a place in Suffolk, quite near Andy, and a big house in Mayfair here in London. The point is that Richard has decided to put Eddie through university in Britain, not the US, and Eddie has not got the sort of grades that would interest the leading universities, even with the Peacher money. So he has decided on Cranwell. Eddie is going to be the second Peacher to live in 25 Finkle Road, so you see why we're vetting the other occupants. You, we know we can trust, Henry.'
Henry smiled, `That's brilliant, Matt.' All of a sudden the Cranwell experience was beginning to look very interesting.
I'll give your number to my dad and you can sort out the details between you. Just get your A Levels.' Henry couldn't resist doing a Henry thing, and launching himself round Matt's neck and kissing that beautiful man, who smiled and hugged Henry back. You know who you remind me of?' he asked.
`Who?'
`My little Andy when he was a teen. You've got all the puppy-like affection and humour ... as well as the shortness.'
Henry laughed. `Just need the money then, don't I?'
He was staying briefly in Highgate before they flew out to Rothenia. It was great to be reunited with Ed and have his warm body next to him at night. But they both admitted that Matt's house had lost something now Justin had moved out. It may have been quieter but it had lost an aura of cheerfulness. To his astonishment, Henry heard Mrs Atkinson regretting Justin's absence.
`But he annoyed the hell out of you, Mrs Atkinson,' he protested.
`Oh that was all on the surface. He was smelly, noisy and undomesticated, but he brought some life to the house. Edward is a nice boy, but quietness and politeness and -- save us -- tidiness, does not add to life's interest.'
`You're a complicated person, Mrs Atkinson.'
Justin was at Ipswich between contracts for Terry, and was cheerfully manning the tills and stocking shelves for Nathan at his garden centre. Matt said Justin seemed to enjoy it very much, and his pet supplies idea was paying off in a modest sort of way, which pleased Nathan, who was trying to hike the profit margin for his uncle. Haddesley Hall was not a major stately home and needed all the income it could get, apart from agriculture and tourism.
The next day, a Wednesday, a row of vans was in front of Matt's house and staff were loading bags. Andy had come up from Suffolk and the two men were happily sitting together over breakfast, facing Ed and Henry. Matt was going through the details. They were taking a Peacher jet to the airport at Rechtenstern and going from there up to a mountain chalet Matt had rented above the city. On Saturday they were to drive up to the palace at Strelzen for the ball. Matt was checking that the boys had the required dress.
It was then that Andy mentioned that Terry had announced his intention of joining them. It surprised me,' he said, because he's no great fan of skiing. He used to say that anything likely to give him a leg injury and affect his dance practice was obviously not worth the trouble, but now, he wants to join us for New Year.'
Henry gave a noise between a snuffle and a giggle, Matt raised an eyebrow, `What do you know that we don't, Henry?'
`It's Davey.'
`Davey being?'
`Our friend, David Skipper. Terry and him fell for each other big time down in Cranwell when he gave us a lift for the open day.'
`I don't believe it,' said Matt.
Well I do,' retorted Andy. When he went on the scent of pickups in the old days, it was always slim and dark younger boys he chased, and your Davey is just that, isn't he? Slim and dark, and quite pretty too.'
Henry pursued the point. `Davey's gone to Zenden to join Rudi's house party, so Terry's decided to come to Rothenia too. I can't believe it's coincidence, I bet they've planned a date.'
Andy looked at Matt who said, `It's as well. Poor Terry couldn't grieve for ever ... but a teenager? I'm not sure that that's such a good thing ... saving your presence lads.'
No offence taken,' said Ed. But don't prejudge Davey. He's very sensitive - over- sensitive some might say - and he is very kind, when his brain's working properly. I think he might do Terry good. It may only be a temporary thing but I'm quite sure Davey will be the better for it. He's different with Terry, not so prickly and wayward, it's like Terry steadies him and puts him on an even keel.'
Andy said, `I'll keep my fingers crossed ... it's nice that you two boys agree that it's an affair with mileage in it. You obviously like your friend.'
Henry nodded, and felt a little troubled when he looked at the smiling and relaxed face of his own boyfriend. Was there still mileage in their affair?
Rechtenberg airport was full of school parties from Britain returning from and arriving for the skiing. Six months of monarchy had made a noticeable difference. The post boxes had a crown above the postal horn. Many things were now kungliche' or Royal', the post office, the national airline, the railways and the national bank. The airport shops had a range of King Rudolf wares: mugs, posters, postcards and tea cloths. Henry resisted the temptation to buy any.
Vans and cars were waiting to take them up into the mountains, where their `chalet' turned out to be more substantial than the word indicated; it was more like a small hotel. There was a ski instructor attached to the property who took Henry in hand as a beginner and Edward as an intermediate. They had a good time, and although Henry doubted that he would ever have any real talent for the sport, he did feel cool on the piste, sipping his vin chaud and posing in the fashionable and expensive gear Matt had bought him in London.
Henry and Ed had a really good time on their own with Matt and Andy. The two men were an education to be around, and the depth of their relationship was a little awesome to Henry, whose doubts about himself were not letting up. Of the two, he found Matt the easier to relate to, and so he manoeuvred himself into a one-to-one encounter with him off the slope when they went to get a coffee.
Matt smiled at Henry, `You OK, little one?'
`Is it that obvious?'
`Mmm, to me anyway. You really are very like what Andy was as a boy. You could always read what was going on behind his eyes, especially when he was uncomfortable ... so, spit it out, Henry.'
It's like this, then. You know that me and Ed are most likely to go our different ways when we go to university?' Matt nodded. I've got doubts, Matt. I don't think that I'm the stuff that long distance relationships are made of. To be honest, I think there's a bit of the tart in me. I haven't got the moral strength to turn the stopcock on my sex drive. I've already been in trouble once, and Ed forgave me, but he'll have a lot more to forgive when we're two hundred miles apart. I don't think he sees it. I think he thinks I'm as steady a guy as he is. But I know I'm not. Tempt me and I will fall. But I hate the idea of disappointing him and worry that he may learn to despise me.'
Oh Henry,' said Matt. You think I can advise you? I'm the wrong person. It's Andy who has strayed away from our bed, not me. And the real authority on bedhopping is Terry. Not that you're ever likely to be as adventurous and wild as he was. Or is it because I'm like Ed that you want to see how I react?'
`Maybe,' said Henry sadly.
`Then what can I say? Ed is a fine man ... I won't call him a boy any more ... besides, he's eighteen now. He is straightforward and steady, and I have no doubt that a great life and career is ahead of him. And that's because he has recognised who he is, subdued himself and caged his passions. You said once that when you first met him, he was frustrated and unpredictable, but he's conquered that and he has gone through fire with his parents. But Henry, you haven't. You have a lovely family and have had a wonderful upbringing. What you haven't had is any real harsh challenge in your life. Even coming out at Medwardine seems to have been easy for you.'
Henry felt it necessary to assert that his decision to come out had not been without its cost, but even as he began he realised that it was not so. Somehow he had maintained his popularity amongst his peer group. So he faltered, and Matt continued.
You're a lovely, happy boy Henry,' he said, and you I will call a boy. And not just because you're still seventeen. People like you instinctively. They see the charm and happiness of the boy you still are and they love you for it. What you have yet to find, little Henry, is a platform of experience on which to build something more than the child you still are. Basically, little man, you've not needed to grow up and life has been kind. But you can't go on being a boy: being grown up is about tough choices, and what'll happen next year is going to be the first big trial of your life.'
Henry's heart fell, he had hoped Matt would have an easy solution, but he was instead telling him things about himself he did not really want to know. His woeful look touched Matt.
`I'm sorry Henry, telling you this is like kicking a puppy, but it has to be said. And I have no solutions. Someone's going to get hurt over this university business, and it's in your hands who that person will be, and how he will be hurt. Scary isn't it, life? All I will say is that, when it comes down to it, you have to be your own man, if you're going to be a man.'
Terry turned up on the morning of New Year's Eve. `Have I missed the skiing? Shame. Might have broken something interesting. You OK Henry? Brave little lad, doing this terrifying thing with snow.'
Nicely timed, Terry,' said Andy, who was a demon on the slopes, you've missed the last day's skiing.'
`Aw shucks. When we off to the party?'
Matt smiled, `The helicopter's coming for us at four. It's formal, so I hope, as a knight of the order of the Rose, that you have your insignia.'
Terry grinned a little sheepishly, `Well, I couldn't not bring it, could I? ... poor Andy, you're the only one without a Rothenian gong.'
Andy laughed, `Oh, give me a chance. But I've brought my insignia from my British knighthood so I may not be as colourful as you, but still I shall not be out of place. Rudi will be proud of us.'
Flying in over Strelzen in the early evening was an experience. The helicopter pilot took them in an arc across the city at Matt's request so that Henry could see the streetplan and buildings from above. They landed at a small, private airport north of the Spa where a big car was waiting. They were already in full dress. The car joined the long queue up the Rodolferplaz as the social elite of Rothenia gathered for the first great occasion of its new calendar. Matt and Andy and their party rather stood out when they went up the grand staircase as it didn't include females, but it was such a crush that it hardly mattered.
They were announced on the door of the ballroom by a stentorian chamberlain who took their tickets and were swept into a world of colour and music. The dancing had not yet begun, and people were standing around in groups. Oskar, in full uniform, soon found Matt, Terry and Andy, and dragged them to a side table to update them on events, leaving Ed and Henry to find a glass of wine and stare around. At eight the boom of a chamberlain's staff rapping on the floor subdued the murmur, and an avenue opened through the crowd as the king appeared at the door, with the countess his mother on his arm. The national anthem played, the room bowed and curtseyed and the king made his way to two chairs placed on a dias. He spoke a few suitable words, took his mother on the floor, and the dancing began.
Rothenians are great dancers, and the Strausses in their day had worked at the Ruritanian court. It was exciting to see the couples moving and spinning to the chamber orchestra. Ed and Henry sat it out, as there was no chance of male on male dancing here. Terry stood by them for a while, twitching with the need to get out there on the floor under the blazing chandeliers, `Why couldn't you be a transvestite, Henry?' he cursed.
`Sorry, I think,' Henry said.
Finally Terry found an unattached lady who was willing to take the floor with this dashing and handsome man with an order of chivalry across his chest, and out they span. They didn't see him again for hours. In truth, the ball soon became boring for the boys after the first excitement, and they were glad when David found them and took them out into a side room where food was laid out.
`So, how's it been, Davey?' Ed asked.
`Interesting. There are two Rudis, y'know. There's Medwardine Rudi who chews the end of a pen when he's thinking and tells very risky jokes, and then there's this other Rudi lurking inside: the king, cool and very self-possessed. He seems to switch from one to the other without any problem. I think he's a high level schizophrenic.'
That would account for a lot,' Ed reflected. What happened at Zenden?'
It was great ... Morton, Westenra, Ahmed and Peters were there too. The castle's amazing. It's got this medieval fairy tale keep in the middle of a lake, and this grand neo-Classical mansion next to it. Christmas was awesome. Rudi threw this banquet for the foresters and their families: roasted oxen, barrels of wine, flambeaux sort of thing in this big feudal hall. Then the next day we went out in Tyrolean hats with dogs to shoot boar. Thank God we didn't see any, I'm not sure what I would have done. Peters let his gun off, cos he goes shooting with his dad, but it knocked him flat and brought a tree branch down.' He looked around expectantly, Seen Terry?'
`We came with him ... he's out there in the ballroom lost in a world of waltz.'
`He's gonna teach me to dance. He says I have the perfect body for it.'
Henry laughed, `I'm sure he thinks you have the perfect body for a lot of other things too.'
David actually blushed. `We're going away for a few days after this is over, and he'll get me back to England.'
Henry had to ask, `Are you coming out to your parents, Davey?'
David shook his head, `It's an open secret round school, but I'll leave it till I go to university. I'm not eighteen till March. It'll save problems. Then me and Terry can go to the next stage.'
`Which is?'
`He's gonna buy a flat in Cranwell and we're gonna live together when he's in town.'
`That'll save costs too,' said Henry, a little enviously. As he was saying that a sudden stir in the crowd round the tables caused his neck to prickle; he turned, Rudi was behind him and people were bowing and curtseying. Henry too gave the Rothenian bow, but he didn't take Rudi's hand to kiss, as some Rothenians did.
`Cool party, Your Majesty,' he said.
`You're not dancing, Henry.'
`I asked Westenra, sir, but he turned me down flat, the git.'
`You're not his type, Outfield. I have a proposal for you of another sort.'
`Sir?'
`In two days, I have a date to keep in Glottenberh with the Black Virgin, I want you to come with me.'