Disclaimer: This is a FICTIONAL story describing the love triangle of a teenage boy. If you are not over 18 years of age, or if you find this type of story offensive, or viewing this material is illegal where you are, then refrain from reading it. The story consists of lust, passion, teenage romance, interracial, love and all the rest of the good stuff in that order... Prepare for sin.
Chapter 24: Same Sex and the City /~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~////~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~////~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~////~~~~~
"Zion?" Byron asked again.
He looked totally clueless.
I went on to explain it how Sampson's mother had explained to me. I told them how Sampson really had two identical brothers. I told them how my confusion surrounding Holden's death was really because Zion had taken Holden's identity. Zion watched me as I explained. In the end he was smiling.
"You should apply for a job at the Daily Planet," Zion joked as I finished revealing so many facts to Byron and T-Boy.
T-Boy looked around for a moment. He had this offended look on his face like someone had just told him something bad. I didn't expect him to react like that, but 'oh well' if he did.
"Wow you own a business?" Byron asked, seeming floored by the fact just like I once was.
"Right, I see myself as more of a figure-head of the business," Zion explained.
He leaned back a little and struck this pose as though someone was supposed to bow down and worship him. I laughed a little because it was kind of comedic, even though that wasn't what he was probably going for.
"Um " I said, "By the way, what the fuck are you bothering us for?"
He was leaning up against the cabinets as though he ran the place. When I asked the question, he seemed like he was surprised by something. He stood erect. He'd never met someone like me. I knew it by the way he was looking at me. He was intrigued. He hadn't seen anything yet.
"Relax guy, I just heard Sampson needed a little help."
I looked at him sideways, "I doubt he told you."
"You're right," Zion replied and said, "Sampson and I aren't exactly on speaking terms. I haven't seen him in years."
"Then who told you?" Byron asked.
"It was Ms. Nicole wasn't it?" I asked.
"Props to you! You're smart," Zion said and gave me a bright smile, "Nicole contacted me. She explained the situation about your female friend being kidnapped. I thought I could help."
I rolled my eyes. He was talking to me like I was some helpless little kid. I had finally got everyone in the house to realize that I held my own and now this guy was back to trying to make me feel like a dependent.
"I don't need no help," I said, bluntly.
Shit if I found Trash, she would be the one needing help.
"No," Byron broke in, "We may need some help from Zion."
I rolled my eyes at Byron knowing he would be the one to say something.
He always had "SOMETHING" to say back to me. He was just one of those irritating people who you liked to have as a friend, but hated to have around because you knew he would probably disagree the most.
"Byron this is grown-up people talk," I lightly insulted and crossed my arms.
I knew Byron would be the last person to actually try to defend Yolanda physically (if it came to that). He would be too scared to break his nails or some shit. Sampson seemed to spoil him everyday like you would do a girl. Sampson had that whole protective thing and Byron was the type to easily become dependent on someone.
"Why are you acting like such an ass lately?" Byron asked.
I swear I would have told him the truth. I would have told him that I wanted his boyfriend because obviously Sampson and I would be a better couple. Still I thought of Sampson's reaction and kept my mouth shut.
I was about to curse or something when T-Boy said, "Syn, Byron is right. Maybe Zion can help."
What the hell? Why was he protecting Zion?
"Shane's gone now," I said and shook my head at Zion, "You can't imagine how mentally lost I am. What can you do? You are pure fiction if I've ever seen it. We can find her ourselves."
I didn't need it, at least not from Zion.
"You seem harsh," Zion said, seeming defensive.
"You seem retarded!" I spat back, "Normally it wouldn't take this long for someone to realize that they aren't wanted."
Zion and I exchanged glances. He wasn't testing me. I wondered if he was scared. I couldn't tell that much. Shit I knew he was surprised though. I would have hit him if he kept trying to tell me "what I was". He didn't know me. Shane's death had changed me for the better
"Listen," Zion said, in a humble tone that was low and deep, "I know Sampson probably told you some things about me. Some of them are true but there are always two parts to a story."
I turned my back to him, "I don't want to hear yours."
I pretended to be looking over a couple of envelopes on the table. I knew the type that Zion was. He believed that I was weak. He looked at me and saw weakness. It had little to do with what Sampson told me about him. I could see that he underestimated me. I hated that.
"We should at least listen," Byron stated.
T-Boy immediately agreed, "Yeah for the sake of Yolanda."
Since when did T-Boy give a fuck about Yolanda? It seemed like everyone was just getting weird. Maybe it was the emotions of Shane being dead. I understood that it was a lot for them to handle. They both just seemed so weak and open to the idea that Zion could just walk through the door and save the day.
"You guys don't even know him," I said, giving them a look of disbelief, "He looks like Sampson, but that's it. He isn't Sampson. We have no idea what kind of guy he is. Why would you trust him?"
"Its not like we got a lot of choice," T-Boy said.
I knew he was thinking that. I could look at T-Boy and Byron and saw how beaten they looked. It was as if Mercedes had sucked out all the courage from them when she shot Shane.
"I just want to help," Zion said, softly from the corner, "I want to help my brother and I think I can do that by helping you guys out. I have connections. I can help find the missing girl."
I looked over at him. He had his hands stuffed in his pockets and his cockiness was still there, but it was smothered in with this sincerity. He looked like he was hoping I'd say yes, but wouldn't be heartbroken if I didn't say yes. He looked like Sampson, but I could tell he wasn't Sampson. Zion seemed to be real confident and cocky about something and even though Sampson had pride, it was a different type of pride.
"Listen," I told Zion softly, "I have no idea who you are. End of story."
My feelings were all rooted down to that. If I looked past the fact that he probably was underestimating me and Sampson basically hated Zion, then it would still boil down to the fact that I didn't know Zion. I couldn't trust him.
He sighed a little and said, "Ok. I'm sorry to bother you."
"Yeah ok," I replied folding my arms.
"Can I leave my contact information?"
"Sure," T-Boy quickly said before I had a voice in it. I would have said something like "No need" or something to make him feel like we had things under control (even though we really didn't).
Zion copied his contact information on a piece of paper and I watched suspiciously. Who really does that? I guess in his world after a stranger got kidnapped, you went to offer help to them because they were friends with your long lost brother who hates you. Yeah I guess it made sense in Zion's head.
Zion shook Byron and T-Boy's hands, "Its nice to meet you finally Tommy. Its also nice to meet you Byron you said that you are in a relationship with Sampson now?"
Zion seemed surprised when he asked it. I almost laughed. I was surprised too shit.
"Yeah," Byron smiled with that social cheesiness he was known for.
"Wow," Zion said and then turned to me, "And you?"
"And me what?"
"Who do you go out with?"
I gave him a face. It was a wrinkled ass face. I think it spoke for itself because the expression was very loud. It was like "What the fuck!" He had no right to be asking me my business like we didn't meet a couple of minutes ago. Zion noticed my stare because he smiled a little to sort of make it seem less offensive. I was still offended though. It was the words, not the way he said it.
T-Boy answered after my expression spoke to him, "Syn and I are fresh out of a relationship."
"Syn?" Zion asked, "Um as in 'seven deadly sin'?"
"Yeah you heard it right," I explained, "Um I'll excuse myself if you don't mind."
"I'm leaving now anyway," Zion said, probably realizing that I was excusing myself because I really didn't want to talk to him at the moment.
He laughed a little with this confident cheek. It was almost like he found it funny that I didn't like him. I didn't understand Zion. I didn't understand a thing about him and I wasn't sure if I cared enough to understand. I just dusted him off and watched in the corner of my eye as he left.
I left myself. Shit, it wasn't really worth standing around and thinking about. Truthfully, I knew that T- Boy and Shane were probably going to contact him for help. They probably thought they wouldn't be able to find Yolanda without Zion.
I wasn't so against the thought of Zion helping us, but I was against the point of making me bow down to Zion. With the whole 'business' thing that was going on, I was sure that Zion had enough people kissing his ass as it was.
It was the day that we were supposed to go see Dr. Lopez. I didn't want to go but I figured that they would probably talk a lot of shit about me if I didn't show up. Byron was the only one overexcited about it. T-Boy and Sampson were really on the fences about the whole thing. They didn't care either way. I was the one with the apprehension. I just didn't believe Dr. Lopez could help me period. "Sampson Byron Tommy Syn sit down please," Dr. Lopez greeted as we walked in the office. I took a seat the farthest away from the rest of them. I didn't want to be confused with them at all. Byron had this wide ass smile like someone just gave him candy or something. Sampson seemed more interested in Byron then anyone else by the way he sat so close and started rubbing his hands with Byron's hands. T-Boy was just there. He seemed really hurt by Shane's death and he just seemed mentally weaker to me. Byron smiled, "Hi Dr. Lopez. I got them to come over." "Good job Byron," Dr. Lopez said as though she was giving praise to a three-year old boy. She probably trained him to be her little puppet. He had tried to convince me for the longest to come and now that I was here Dr. Lopez was trying to act like there wasn't still remaining friction between her and I. "We need to hurry up," I said, "I'm hungry." Dr. Lopez started to talk. She was doing her usual, sincere apologies for Shane's death like she knew anything about Shane (besides what Byron told her.) "Its so sad," Dr. Lopez stated in her long speech, "I think we could all agree that Shane's life was taking by an act of violence. Though it was accidental, we can all see that the harshness of even having a gun on the scene is clue on homicidal intentions." I looked around. Byron was crying for some unknown reason. Sampson was trying to help him relax like a good boyfriend should. Pathetic. T-Boy had his head cocked down as though taking a few minutes to respect Shane. "Sometimes I feel like I could have done more," Sampson explained, "The feeling is really hard for me to control." "That's why we are here," Dr. Lopez replied in this confident tone, "We need to realize that you are not at fault for what happened to Shane. None of you are. Murder can be such a horrible thing." Who did she think she was? Moses? Did she think she'd come back to save her people or something? I rolled my eyes, "I hate people who say that " Dr. Lopez stared across the room at me with this wondering stare. I had struck her attention. She had been waiting for me to speak. She had been waiting for me to disagree. "What do you hate?" "People who argue that murder is a horrible thing," I said, "They waste time arguing that it is a bad thing, like anyone said it was a good thing. All that time used to argue its ethics could be transferred to time used to find its solution." "Hm I see," Dr. Lopez had this blank look on her face and then started to write things down in her notepad. I hated when she did that. It was almost like she wanted to disagree with me, but instead she was just analyzing me without replying. She just kept sketching words in her notepad. I wondered if they were words similar to "he's crazy" or "keep all sharp objects away from him." Shit maybe I was crazy now who knew? "Maybe we should stay on subject," T-Boy said, probably feeling the tension, "We were talking about Shane's death " "What is there to talk about?" I asked. Dr. Lopez was the one who chose to answer, "What are you think about Shane's death? How do you feel?" Ok "I think it's sad he died and I feel sad that he died," I said bluntly, a little cynicism in my attitude, "Some one died. Truth is I wished it was someone else, but we don't always get what we want?" I looked over at Sampson as I said that. He was living proof that we didn't get what we want. There he was a sexy prince of princes cuddled up with a guy who used to be a male escort. What was wrong with that picture? I should have been in it instead of Byron. Byron raised his head as though he was offended, "Syn, you don't got to be so cheeky about it?" "Cheeky is that what you think I am?" Immoral unpleasant weird; I would understand those words. Of all the words to describe me, he chose cheeky. It seemed a little belittling. It was almost like he was trying to downplay me. "Yeah," Byron answered, looking me in my eyes, "Lately you have been real harsh. You just can't say you hate people like that. I know you aren't the most sensitive person, but since Shane died " "Byron its ok," Dr. Lopez explained, "This is an open forum. Everyone has right to say what's on his mind. Syn, you are free to express yourself here." I shrugged, knowing everyone was expecting me to say something else. Sampson, T-Boy and Byron stared at me as though expecting me to bring up all the little issues I had in my head. I knew they wanted me to, so I just didn't. It took away the point of putting in that unexpected value to it. Truth is maybe Shane's death did affect me, but it affected T-Boy to. It made him weak. It made Sampson meaner. It made Byron well he was just a little more Byron-ish. Now that Shane was gone there was no one left to protect Brunswick from the likes of Syn. Now that Shane was dead, he couldn't hold me back from lashing out at them all. I would expose all their sins one at a time until they realized that they were lying in their own hypocritical grave. Not yet however "What? What are you all looking at?" I asked, making them all uncomfortable. They all turned around and stopped staring at me. I demanded attention but I didn't want it. I wanted to make them feel guilty, but I didn't deny that I was guilty as well. Now that Shane was gone, the entire town was on the brink of truth. "Why don't we continue with this theme," Dr. Lopez said, "It seems like the four of you are really good friends, but there are also some dormant feelings underneath the friendship. Am I right?" I looked around the room. These were definitely the three people I had closest to me now that Yolanda was kidnapped and Shane was dead. They were supposed to be my closest friends and yet I felt so uncomfortable around all of them. Truth was there was no one left that I felt truly comfortable with. Sampson was the one who answered, "I guess Tommy and I have a little bit of a history of fighting." "Little?" T-Boy questioned. "Ok, ok, we have a big history of fighting," Sampson adjusted, "But it isn't as bad as it was before. I don't think it is at least." T-Boy was quiet at Sampson's remark. I could tell he wasn't entirely agreeing with him. Shit, I didn't agree either. Just the other day they were arguing about whether we should worry about finding Mercedes or finding Yolanda, which was stupid because most likely Yolanda was with Mercedes. Dr. Lopez continued, "Is that the only conflict in the house at the moment?" "Well " T-Boy added to the conversation, "Syn and I broke up lately " "That isn't conflict," I quickly said trying to shut him up. I knew he would bring it up. I just had a feeling that he would bring up the breakup. I guess he was still thinking about it. I didn't really understand why unless he still had feelings for me. T-Boy nodded in agreement, "Yeah, but its still a lot of tension. It's hard for me to fathom the idea of a complete breakup when we are living in the same house. Don't you feel uncomfortable?" Sampson was staring over at me and so was Byron. Dr. Lopez was busily taking notes and I felt like the spotlight had completely changed from Sampson and T-Boy's beef to T-Boy and my relationship. What the fuck kind of tension was he talking about. I didn't feel any tension. "I have no idea what you are talking about," I replied. "I still well you know " "No I don't know, I told you, I have no idea what you are talking about." T-Boy paused for a moment as though gathering some strength, "I still love you, Syn." T-Boy was staring at me and then I stared back, then he stared away. It was almost like a dramatic play cut straight out of some sappy love story. I should have been intrigued. I should have been moved. I wasn't. I was embarrassed because everyone was waiting for me to reply with something equally sappy. "Um ok can we talk about Shane though?" I asked, completely taking him by surprise, "That is why we came here right?" "Yeah I guess you're right," He nodded, self-consciously as though feeling disappointed about the entire situation. Shane's death had made T-Boy so sensitive. Sampson was staring at me. I could sense a little resentment about the whole situation. He didn't seem to be hiding the fact that he was upset about what T-Boy had said. His eyebrows lowered a little and he had his arms crossed. It wasn't like Byron noticed it. Byron was watching me too, with these meddlesome eyes like he was snooping into a house or something. He wasn't even watching Sampson that was his problem. He didn't notice what his boyfriend was doing. That was why it was so easy for his boyfriend to get drunk and have a night of passion with me. "Dr. Lopez, are you going to write the entire time?" I asked, with irritation, "Or are you going to actually guide the discussion." Dr. Lopez laughed, "I missed your frankness most, Syn. You are right. Sampson how have you been d4wliny with the death of Shane." I guess she asked Sampson because he was sitting there with his innocent look being forced and manipulated into some kind of angry face. It was cute to see Sampson and T-Boy at each other's throats because Sampson looked cute when he was mad. He was such an innocent looking person and it just looked weird in an adorable way. "I just want to find the one who did it," Sampson explained, "I see a difference in the way my best friend Syn acts, my brother is acting different, even my boyfriend is weirder. I just want things to get back to the way they were. There's only two ways to do that. Bring Shane back from the dead which was impossible or " "Kill the bitch," I finished, thinking about Mercedes at the moment. "See what I mean?" Byron panicked, "Syn has always been out there, but this is the first time I saw him talking about killing someone. Dr. Lopez " "Stop whining. What is she going to do?" I asked him, bluntly, "She couldn't make me believe I was wrong before so what is the difference now?" Dr. Lopez paused, "You are right " I looked at her. My mouth almost dropped open. I never thought Dr. Lopez would actually agree that she couldn't really convince me to change my mind. I had that mindset carved into me like the Ten Commandments in stone. I was just stubborn. I couldn't believe that she finally understood that. "What?" I asked, completely in awe. "Syn is right," Dr. Lopez announced to the four of us, "I used to try to manipulate him because his mind was so intractable. It became like a game with Syn. I tried to sway his beliefs, just to prove that I could. I failed." Suddenly, I didn't feel so horrible towards Dr. Lopez. She had admitted that her issue with pride had gotten out of control. It felt nice to see her pride just not be there anymore. She seemed humble as she told all of us. Though Byron, T-Boy and Sampson were all lost about what was going on, I understood Dr. Lopez completely. "I see," I muttered, hoping to break the wall of protection I had up against her. "If you forgive me," Dr. Lopez explained, "I just want to say that you are lucky. It may not seem like it, but Byron cares about you or else he wouldn't be considering your reaction to Shane's death. It seems like all of your friends here care for you. You are a very lucky person Syn." Ok lucky? She was going too far with making me feel good. "Maybe maybe I'll come see you again," I said, "Maybe I'll play something on the piano." "I'd like that." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~ That was the story of how I got back to seeing Dr. Lopez. I didn't see her as often as I did before, but I did come to visit her none-the-less. A week had gone by since Shane had died, but it all seemed fresh in my head. I knew his family was still getting ready for the funeral, which would have been a big one. I tried to stay away from the whole planning thing. I knew it would be a lot like I was leaving all the work for everyone else, but I was worried about myself at the moment. I didn't want to get real emotional about Shane's death anymore. I just didn't feel comfortable crying. Shane's death had brought Sampson and Byron closer together. They still didn't have anal sex, even though Byron made it sure to share the rest of the information with me over breakfast the next Monday. "Well I think we all know the rumors about Sampson's penis size," Byron said, giggling a little, "They are very true." He was telling T-Boy and I as though we didn't know. I remembered that three-some type thing that went down. Shit it definitely proved that Sampson's dick was bigger then usual. It wasn't like monster big, but it was big enough for anyone to consider it a big dick. "Oh boy not this again," T-Boy whined and moaned. It seemed like the four of us were some remixed episode of Sex and the City, where instead of talking about sexual experiences with strange men, we talked about sexual experiences with one another. "You had sex with him?" I asked Byron, a little interested just a little. "No, well I jerked it off," Byron said, "It felt so good. Only thing is something happened afterwards that I wanted to talk to you about." I wanted to laugh. This guy used to be an escort, but he still was horrible in sex. The escorting seemed to spoil him. He just sat around while the guys worked themselves to an orgasm over his refined body. It was like Byron never really had to work at sex until now that he was with Sampson. "What is it?" Byron thought about it, "Well, I kind of licked the nut off of his 6 pack afterwards..." "Uh-Byron, wait one second," T-Boy said. T-Boy took his bowl of frosted flakes and the entire gallon of milk in his hands. I watched T-Boy as he left, probably to a place where he couldn't hear the conversation that we were having. I looked at Byron with an angry look that he didn't get at first. I was pissed. "Syn you think that was too much?" Byron asked. "Um, did you swallow?" "Yeah." "How did he react to you afterwards?" "Well " Byron thought for a moment before answering, "I tried to kiss him, but he sort of pulled away and left the room saying he had to use the bathroom. I thought it was to use the toilet, but he ended up taking a really long shower." "That's not a good thing," I concluded. "Serious?" "Yeah, a shower means he felt dirty," I thought about it, "Think about Sampson. He's not really the freaky type. He's sort of the plain and simple. It doesn't take all that swallowing-action to make him satisfied." "Hopefully, he forgives me," Byron said, "I really I really love Sampson. You know, kind of like T-Boy and you used to be." Hopefully Sampson leaves you and comes to me, I thought. I gave him a sideways look. Byron was in love again. He was either the biggest flirt or the biggest fool. I thought about it for a moment. He was definitely the biggest fool. "Um Byron, I hate to break it to you, but Sampson probably isn't thinking about love now." "How do you know?" "Well, Sampson, as far as I know, never went out with someone for more then little over a month," I recognized, "I am not saying he's a player but he seems to change a lot quicker then the rest of us." He definitely did. First he was with Mercedes, then he was with Yolanda and now he was with Byron. He ended up being in three relationships in four months. Sampson wasn't a player type. He just seemed like the type of guy that wanted something new all the time. I guess he sort of went with the best thing out there most of the time. I didn't mind it at all, shit. I was just watching to see if Sampson would make some kind of record for dating the best looking people in the shortest time. "I can change all that," Sampson said, a little cockily. "Oh really?" I replied smiling, "I guess we'll soon see because you guys just had your month's anniversary. If you last another month, then we'll know that you are right." Byron was cute, but Sampson was cuter. I didn't know if it would last that much longer. Sampson definitely was a secret kind of charmer. He was the type that would see you and pull you away to private areas then whisper sweet nothings into your ear. Byron accepted my challenge bluntly, while T-Boy came in the room to tell me that we were ready for school. I didn't want to go to school. Truthfully, I just wanted to stay home today and watch Montell or something on television. Well not Montell probably Maury or something. Montell was too dramatic. There was always someone surviving a life or death situation or someone who is living by some kind of miracle. Maury was more familiar to me. It was all about paternity tests and who didn't like a good paternity test? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Big Rob had come to my table at lunchtime. I was sitting alone. It was by choice. I could have sat with numerous nobodies if I wanted to. I could have said with the popular nobodies (T-Boy, Medusa, etc) or I could have sat with the unpopular nobodies (Lamont ha I don't know the rest of their names). I chose not to. I chose to sit by my own and just have everyone realize that they could never take Shane's place "Hey," Big Rob explained, "You mad at T-Boy?" "No," I said, confused, "Why would I be mad at T-Boy?" I didn't get it. T-Boy had been acting strangely. On the drive to school, he had stopped way out of his schedule to by me something to eat from my favorite fast food place. That was unlike T-Boy. He was usually too lazy to do anything more then expected from him. "He said that yesterday you seemed mad at him. Then today, you didn't sit with him. I mean if that was the case, I would think you are upset with me as well." I looked behind Byron across at the other T-Boy who was lightly chilling with his arms crossed. He was trying to act like he wasn't looking over here and trying to see what was going on, but I could tell. He was snooping from across the lunchroom. He was probably trying to read facial expressions. "He sent you, didn't he?" "Um " Big Rob paused before saying anything. What kind of playground shit was T-Boy on? I mean, since when do you get your friend to ask someone if they are mad at you or not. I was just in a bad mood and didn't feel like speaking to anyone. If I were mad at him, I would just be sitting with someone else. I wouldn't be sitting alone. "I thought you didn't like fags or something?" I asked, trying to remember exactly what he had said. "I don't," Big Rob laughed, "It just sucks that you got that cat like that." Like what? I looked over at T-Boy. He did kind of seem a little like he was worried about something or he had something on his mind weighing him down. I didn't do anything to cause it though. I was pretty sure about that. The bell rang at the time and I was happy because people would probably start thinking that I was starting to get back on talking terms with the popular kids since I was with Big Rob. I didn't want to make that happen because I had worked hard to earn my own identity apart from the popular kids. I was now officially the popular boy that didn't hang out with the popular kids. I walked through the halls taking my time to get to class. Shit, I definitely wasn't in a rush. T-Boy and his friends were ahead. T-Boy was looking back. I knew he wanted to come talk to me, but he was hesitating probably believing I was really mad at him. T-Boy definitely changed. He really never used to be the shy, hesitant type. "Hey," a voice said from behind. I turned around to see Lamont. He looked completely different. I didn't realize it either. He looked as though he was trying his best to dress nice. It wasn't exactly working though. "Um what happened to you?" He looked funny. He had his hair grown a little bit and someone had trimmed around the sides. He had on this ugly gray shirt that wouldn't have been so ugly if they matched his pants. Lamont was really sticking out in these reddish, brown-tinted pants. The whole entire thing looked like an attempt to change from his boring white shirt, blue pants style that had gone completely wrong. "You like it?" Lamont asked, looking up and down at his outfit. I had to be honest, "Not really nice try though." Lamont was going to say something else but then all of a sudden I noticed T-Boy was in my face. I had almost bumped into him by the sudden way he just appeared closer. It was like he bolted over to me. "Syn, can I talk to you alone?" He gave Lamont a stare like that told him to go away. I knew everyone in the school still wondered why I hung out with a guy like Lamont. I think even Lamont wondered. I guess it was just his face. It was warm or something. I don't know. He just needed a little more confidence and self-esteem. Lamont was looking uncomfortable by T-Boy's stares. I could tell he really didn't want to be around if T- Boy was around anyway. He was scared of T-Boy. Not physically scared, but scared T-Boy would humiliate him. "Lamont, why don't we go shopping this weekend," I said, trying to make him feel less bad, "You cool with that?" "Sure I'll um ask my mom for money," he explained. Lamont was grinning widely, almost like I had made his day. It didn't take a lot to make Lamont happy. He just seemed like he never was really exposed to a lot. It was sad to me. "Syn, can I talk to you?" T-Boy repeated. I had almost forgot he was standing there. "Lamont, I'll talk to you later ok," I excused him and then turned to T-Boy, "What is it?" T-Boy waited till Lamont left before he spoke, "You know what it is! You haven't even said anything about what I told you yesterday. Have you even been thinking about it?" "Um you mean when you said you still loved me," I said and then lowered my voice because of the passers, "You mean that?" "Yeah. I want to talk about it." "T-Boy, this isn't exactly the time. I mean, Shane is dead and his killer is on the loose. My cousin has gone missing. You have your priorities mixed up." He looked at me a little trampled by my words. The sadness quickly turned into a look of anger though that wasn't just weird, but extremely spontaneous. "Whatever, I don't even give a fuck." He turned his back on me and went back to the hall, probably catching up to his friends or something. If he didn't give a fuck then why did he talk to me about it? I wasn't even going to waste my time trying to figure out the shit he was doing lately. Since Shane died, it was like T-Boy wanted to be with me even more. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~// On the school lunch hour, Byron surprised me by picking me up and saying we should all go have some lunch at his favorite diner. T-Boy and Sampson were already in the car. Byron was always trying to keep some kind of peace in the group. I guess for a while he was being successful. The diner was this preppy rich people type. It looked real gregarious, since it had a window as a wall. I didn't like it. People on the sidewalk were passing by and watching us eat, like we were on some kind of display. I didn't get it. Was it a way of advertising the diner or something? It wasn't like when we peered out the glass there was a nice scene. It was a busy downtown street with high buildings, ignorant people and annoying vehicles. "T-Boy how was your day?" Byron asked. I knew that him bringing us here was probably Dr. Lopez's idea. She probably told him to do it so that he could help us get along. T-Boy peered over at me, "It was shot." "Mine too," Sampson followed up, putting his napkin on the table, "The teacher is forcing us to take a trip to those nasty backwoods tomorrow." I ignored T-boy's remark but remarked to Sampson's, "What's wrong with that?" They all looked at me with that same look. I had gotten used to it. It was one of those; "Syn's about to say something crazy" looks. They were damn right too. "Its just fake to me," Sampson said a little lowly, "I don't see why we have to go to the woods to learn about them. They have the same things in a textbook or something." I raised my eyebrows, "That's bullshit Sampson! I never knew you thought like that." "Syn, don't talk to him like that," Byron warned, as though he would do something to me if I did. "Shut up," I told him, getting off the table and looking down at them, "You are all fucking assholes. You got T-Boy worried about how he is going to get his boyfriend back while Sampson is worried about going to the woods. Shane just died! Am I the only one in mourning?" Sampson looked a little humiliated, "Syn " "No fuck that!" I shouted, "Haven't you learned anything from Shane's death? You hate going to the woods. Is it really that bad! You act like this shit stain of a city is any more REAL then the beautifully toned dirt in the woods." T-Boy said something, trying to calm me down. Sampson I think was trying to apologize. I didn't know though. I was just so mad that I got up and left the diner. I didn't look back so I didn't know if anyone had come after me or tried to stop me. If they did try to stop me then they didn't get me. Before I had calmed down, I was walking home. I knew it was just lunchtime at school and I had a couple more hours during the day, but I didn't give a fuck. I didn't feel like being in school and around more people from Brunswick with their little distorted views of things. ~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As I walked home, I began to realize that I was alone in the world. With Shane gone, there was no one really left. T-Boy, Sampson shit even Lamont all belonged to Brunswick. It was like there was a struggle war between Brunswick and me for the definition of reality. It was what everyone else believed and then it was what Syn believed. Everyday people swore this city was some kind of paradise. I wondered if they thought heaven came with a cappuccino maker and a window-walled diner. That was their heaven. That was what they believed was reality. They were so swallowed in their own lies that no one loved the truth. They swore they were all unique, but really they were all identically the same. Children were raised to be just like the parents. Parents were raised to be just like everyone else. Where had this routine gone wrong in me? Why was I so different? I realized that I was probably even an outcast from the gay community? How could I be an outcast of the outcasts? "Is anyone home?" I had turned the corner and was making my way to the porch when I realized that Sampson was there no, not Sampson. "Zion?" I asked, watching the boy knock at the door, "What are you doing?" He turned around. He was dressed in a suit. There was a woman at his side. She was really tall. She was over 6 feet. She must have been some kind of model because she had that look on her. She had these square rimmed glasses and her facial expression looked like someone had just pissed her off. She looked way too serious. "Oh," Zion said, surprised as I came from behind but smiling, none-the-less, "I was actually looking for you and your roommates." "Well, this is a bad time," I explained, "Byron would usually be the only one home now, but he's gone too." "Well then its good I found you," Zion said, still smiling, "Can you come with me?" "Where?" "Uh, it is sort of a surprise. You won't regret it though." "Sorry, I'm busy, I was going to get something to eat," I said quickly. It was an excuse. I had just eaten at the diner. Still, I could never get enough food. "I'll get you something, when we get there," Zion said. My head thought hard, "I have to work soon." "I'll have you back before then." I shrugged, "Listen, I just don't want to go because I really don't like you." Zion stood there for a while, probably a little surprised. The woman beside him grunted as though seeing me in a bad light. Truth was I could care less if he was surprised and she was offended. Though Shane's death didn't teach the others anything, it taught me something. That something was that everyone in this city was shit and it really didn't matter what I said. I probably thought that before, but now that thought was just renewed. "Listen," Zion explained, with a little pleading tone, "You don't know me. I don't know you. We both understand that. Trust me though, this is important. I wouldn't bother you if it wasn't." I gave him a look. Shit. He definitely was a suspicious person. He seemed nice, but there was this undertone of suspicion. Sampson gave me a similar feeling. He looked innocent, but he could get really angry and aggressive. Zion looked innocent too (they were twins), but he just seemed like the sneaky type underneath. "I still don't like you," I noted and then shrugged, "But I'll go I guess." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~///~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The woman that Zion had with him, I found out was his personal assistant. Her name was Ms. Whyte. She acted the exact same way that she looked. As we drove in the limousine that Zion rode in, she was on the phone making calls the entire time. It was almost like she was business all the time. I didn't like someone to usually be so serious, but since she was overwhelmed with work, she didn't have a chance to get on my nerves. Zion however, seemed to be workless and so had a lot of time to make up for it. "So you are gay?" "You asked that already and I said yes," I explained. He had been asking me a thousand questions. I felt like some reporter or something was interviewing me. I had thought about saying the words, "Shut the fuck up." I would have said them too but I figured if he kicked me out, I was too far to walk home. I just put on a shit face and let him know I really wasn't interested in this shit. "My mom hates gay people," Zion said, like I cared, "You know that she put my brothers up for adoption just because they were gay?" "Sampson is bisexual, but yeah I heard," I answered, still annoyed at the situation. I began to wonder exactly why I came. I didn't feel like Zion was going to lead me in the woods and kill me. He didn't have any motive to do that. I was just worried that he would be wasting my time with something. The ride was kind of long too. I wasn't really worried about work. Hell, I was trying to get fired anyway. I hated that job and if she fired me, then I could probably be applicable for unemployment. "I don't hate Sampson," Zion interestingly said, "I really didn't hate Holden either. I don't hate gay people. I guess it just made me look like the bad guy that my mother kept me." "Is that why you are being all nice to Sampson's friends?" "Yeah," Zion answered, not thinking it as offensive, "I'm not that bad. I mean, Sampson thinks it. He probably made you think it by now, but I'm really not if you get to know me. No one really knows me though." "All I know is that you are a pretender " I started, not wanting to blow up his spot completely in front of Ms. Whyte, even though she wasn't paying attention. Zion looked down. He looked a little sad. I grunted. It was weird. This kid had put himself in the position where he was taking the place of his real brother, Holden as a millionaire, but he still found something to be sad about. Human nature was full of desires. If you got a lot, you just seemed to want more. "You can say it she knows," Zion explained, "A lot of people in the Syndicate know I'm not Holden. Shit, ask them if they really care. Just as long as I can pretend to be Holden, then they don't give a fuck." "Why would you pretend though?" Zion turned his head, "You don't know my mother. She was demanding. She wanted to raise the three perfect sons. None of us were perfect though, but me I was an actor." "I see that," I said looking around at the limousine. He definitely had to be a damn good actor to get all of this. "That is all I am. That is all the Syndicate is," Zion explained, "We are just one big act." I looked at Ms. Whyte. She wasn't paying attention, but I guess if she heard even a little of what Zion was saying, it didn't bother her. I looked at the crystal glasses at the mini-bar. I felt the smooth firmness of the leather seats. Zion was living the life that most people (the materialistic people that is) dreamed of. "Did you act like you were straight?" I questioned, "I mean so your mother wouldn't put you up for adoption too?" He looked at me and laughed. I just got the whole gay vibe from him. It was probably because Sampson seemed so straight to me, but I was fooled. "I don't know," he answered and then laughed again, "I seriously have acted so much that I really don't know what I am anymore. Want to help me find out?" "I'll pass." I knew he was just joking with the flirt, but just in case he was serious, I backed down. I scooted over leaving enough room between us on the chair. He laughed a little harder. I still hardly knew the guy and definitely didn't trust him since he admitted to me he was a complete actor. "Listen, I'm only telling you this, because I know you aren't the type to go telling other people," Zion explained, "Especially not Sampson." "You don't know me, I just might tell." He laughed again, "You are funny." "If you think so " I said a little confused that he thought that I was joking. I was dead serious. We got out of the car with these guys holding up umbrellas for us since it started raining. We were downtown once again. It was deeper downtown though. We were standing in front of this tall corporate building that looked like something out of a Manhattan brochure. I got out from under the umbrellas. I was a grown ass man. I didn't need anyone to hold an umbrella up for me. Zion seemed to see that I was uncomfortable with them and he sent the guys away. It wasn't raining that hard anyway. The fact that they had come outside to waste their time just for us to walk from the car to the building was crazy. The car was parked right outside the front of the building. It was just a couple of steps to get in. Zion took me inside the building and led me in the elevator. A lot of people were there. They all looked so serious and so busy, just like Ms. Whyte. Ms. Whyte herself had moved from her cellphone to her sidekick. She was punching in all kinds of things on the little sidekick. It looked like she was busy 24-7. "By the way does Sampson like you?" Zion had asked the question as we made our way down to the basement of the building in the elevator. It was a weird question to ask. Shit. I had been wondering the same thing lately. "He used to," I answered, "Not anymore though. He goes out with that Byron cat." "Weird, I thought he liked you. You look better then Byron to me " Wow. That was weird. I guess naturally, I was a better looker then Byron, but Byron was a lot neater. He was so immaculate. He took a shower 3 times a day. He polished himself to a point that he tried to look perfect 24-7. I figured most people would think he was a better-looking guy then I was. Shit, why else would Sampson be going out with him? "That's why he would be with me?" I asked, cause it didn't seem so convincing. "Oh," Zion said, "You also remind me of our father. He was so real. I figured since we all loved our father so much that Sampson would be a little more attracted to you." "Your father?" "He was killed after insulting this drunk one time. You are just like my father though. I really thought Sampson would really be interested in you." I guess that was a compliment. In Zion's world, it was a compliment at least. I didn't get it. It was kind of discouraging to me. I didn't want to think that the reason that Sampson was attracted to me was because I reminded him of his dead father. It was just kind of too Oedipus Complex for me. Zion seemed think it was a compliment though because he gave me a weird smile. Was he saying I would be killed after insulting someone? The ride down ended when we came to the basement floor. It was a tall building that was 30 stories tall. I didn't like the idea of being in the basement. I just kept thinking about September 11th with the buildings falling. "Why we here?" I asked Zion. "It's a surprise," he answered, a little seriously. We walked past these guys who looked even more serious then the guys who were in the lobby. They were all dressed in suits and all had an expression that made me think they had a bad childhood. There were more and more men as we made our way to the back. The walls got narrower and the doors got fewer. Finally we had made our way to the last door, where there were two guards standing. It was one of those sliding doors like they had in Star Trek. I laughed when I saw it slide and Zion lead me through because the door said, "Welcome Holden McKnight." What the hell kind of futuristic government agency-type shit was going on here? "The Syndicate participates in some fugitive programs," Zion explained and then said, "This is where we hold the prisoners." Suddenly my smile was wiped off. The room seemed like a jailhouse type place. There were cages full of people. For a moment I was speechless but then all of a sudden I felt someone jump into me and grip me hard with this tight hug. I turned to see Yolanda. "Syn! I missed you!" she screamed. I couldn't believe it. Yolanda was not only in one piece, but she was happy! She wasn't dressed like she was auditioning for Amistad anymore. She was dressed in these bright colors just like she used to do before. She had these bubbly eyes. She had gone back to her usual self. "Wow " I said, completely surprised, then something else caught my eye, "Is that " It was her, no, I mean, it was them. Mercedes was sitting in a cage along with her brothers. I couldn't believe it. They just stared up at me. They were there. I didn't know what to say. I was speechless.