Headbangers Ball - Chapter 4
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So this is the fourth installment of a true story about how I developed a unique fetish. It is not for everyone, but if you discover that you are turned on or even curious, feel free to reach out to me (my email is posted at the top). I'm actually hoping to talk to, and even meet, others who are into this, especially if you are the active type who wants to inflict this fetish on me.
In the last chapter I described how me and my buddy moved out to the garage and we both found bliss by banging my head against the sturdy wooden work bench. And I discussed how I carefully brought up the topic of using other surfaces like the cinder block walls in the garage, and I was basically given permission to scramble into place wherever I wanted my buddy to bang my skull. It's now the last week of the school year. If you think back to high school, that really means very little unless you are a senior. They were already done for a week and graduation would be Memorial Day weekend. For the rest of us in the lower grades, and me and my buddy just finishing our sophomore year, the end of school was uneventful. Most final exams and assignments were due over a week ago and the last week was basically ceremonial with an awards scholarship presentation in the gym and a school picnic and just tying up loose ends, returning text books, and we were forced to do a lot of cleaning throughout the school. There was no homework that last week. So after the school day there was plenty of time for me and my buddy to meet up and hangout in the garage.
With all the hype about graduation for the seniors, one of whom was my sister, I was also excited to have a graduation of my own, graduating from getting my skull banged on the wooden workbench to getting my skull banged against a cinder block wall for the first time. I've been thinking about it for over a week and my buddy was agreeable to it. So the first chance I got, I scrambled into place, sitting on my ass, leaning against the cinder block wall in the garage with my mouth already open before he was fully in the garage and closing the walk-in door behind him. My buddy developed a rather deviant smirk of superiority that appeared on his face while he undid his pants in front of me. When they dropped to his ankles I looked at his cock and it was half hard. I was a little disappointed that we couldn't get right to the head banging and I had to spend a few minutes using my mouth to bring him to that full rock hardness that I needed to drive my head into the wall. But once I leaned forward to sniff his cock and balls and started licking, I was actually grateful that I had these few minutes to take in the sights and smells and tastes of him. While I know I am growing obsessed with getting my skull banged against hard surfaces, I am still primarily a cocksucker, and it is both a thrill and a privilege that any guy would expose his private parts to me and allow me to sniff and lick them and suck his cock to full hardness. I had to curb my enthusiasm for the head banging shit and be more patient and more appreciative. So I started paying more attention to these foreplay rituals of sniffing licking and sucking a guy's cock and balls and getting him turned on enough to start thrusting once he reached full hardness. Just as my thanking him after he bangs my head into a dizzy, buzzing, painful state of euphoria and shooting his load down my throat, the foreplay of sniffing and licking and sucking a guy to full erection was also a show of respect and gratitude. So from then on, I made sure I appreciated every moment of every blow job, from beginning to end. And I focused on getting him hard and turned on enough to be extra rough today. It took less than two minutes before he started to move his hips.
I'm sitting on the cement floor of the garage with my butt up against the wall, leaning forward and sucking his cock to throbbing hardness and he is starting to move now. My legs are spread wide in a V so he can stand in front of me with his shorts and underwear down around his ankles. He is about two feet back from the wall. My head is about 8 to 10 inches from the wall. I'm still sucking him, and when we started his hands were at his side, but now they are on my head. He's not pulling my hair or anything, more like he is rubbing my head and feeling the bones of my skull. His hips are moving in slow, shallow thrusts as I suck hard on his cockhead. But then I feel his hands move from my head to somewhere above me, and I realize he just placed his hands on the wall, a sign that the real face fucking is about to begin. And I pull back while putting a strong suction on his cock so that just the head of his cock is in my mouth, giving his body the signal that his hips need to thrust to get his cock back deep into my mouth. And that triggers his first hard thrust and his cock, powered by his hips and muscular thighs, drove my head quickly backwards until my skull bone made contact with the cinder block wall behind me. Hard skull bone hitting hard cinder block. It created a dull thud, so different from the sound of my head against the work bench leg with the rattle of metal from the tools that were usually stored on the shelf. This was much quieter, at least externally. Inside my head, however, my brain shot off fireworks. I saw colors.
It took less than 20 seconds for my buddy to build up a steady, consistent rhythm to his thrusting. Over the months we have been doing this, he has been conditioned to operate like a well-oiled machine. I made sure to follow his dick on his back strokes, pushing my torso toward him and drawing my head forward 5 or 6 inches to meet his next powerful thrust. I guess I lied in a previous chapter when I said I was done with all the science and research, because as I am writing this part of my true experience, I realized that I should probably explain why moving my torso forward and my head away from the wall (or any other hard surface or object my skull is being banged against) is important and why 5 to 6 inches is the ideal amount of space between my skull and whatever it is hitting. It comes down to the physics or propulsion. A hard cock that is propelled by the thrusting hips of a face fucker creates a force. There is an impact of the hard cock hitting the back wall of my throat, and if my head was pinned to the wall with no gap between my skull and the surface, all of the force of the impact would be concentrated on the spot where his cock head hits the back wall of my throat. Don't get me wrong. I also love that, and during a normal face fuck when head banging is not something the top is into, I love to be pinned motionless and let a guy just use her cock as a battering ram to bruise that back wall of my throat. I say back wall because most of the time (unless the guy has the right curve for the position we are in) that cock is not going down into my throat. It's thrusting through my lips, over my tongue, and colliding with that back wall of my mouth right at the entrance to my throat. So if I am kneeling or sitting and my back is against the wall and a guy just wants to bang my mouth real hard, his cock is going to be hitting that same spot repeatedly and can very quickly create a tender, sore, bruised area. And like I said, I do love that. But picturing me in that same position and add in head banging (when the top wants to do that to me) and I really can't just keep my head against the wall because there will be no skull impacts resulting from his thrusts. So when I lean forward on his pull back strokes, my skull travels away from the wall so that when his hips thrust forward, and his cock impacts that back wall of my throat, the momentum of that impact, still powered by his thrust, pushes my head backwards so that my skull makes impact with the wall while his cock head also impacts the back wall of my throat. I hope this explanation makes sense. I realize I'm talking about two different kinds of walls in the same sentence, and maybe I should have used a different surface than a wall to explain this, so let me restate it using the workbench instead. So when I lean forward on his pull back strokes, my skull travels away from the solid leg of the workbench so that when his hips thrust forward, and his cock impacts that back wall of my throat, the momentum of that impact, still powered by his thrust, pushes my head backwards so that my skull makes impact with the solid leg of the workbench while his cock head also impacts the back wall of my throat. I hope that clears it up.
So why is 5 to 6 inches the ideal amount of distance between my skull and the wall? One answer is the speed of his thrusts. If the guy is fucking my face fast, both parts of the thrust (the push forward and the pull back stroke) are fast. So that doesn't leave me a lot of time to rock forward on each of his pull back strokes before he thrusts forward again. In that quarter of a second during his pull back, I only have enough time to get my skull 5 to 6 inches from the wall. The faster he fucks, the shorter that distance becomes. So most of the time as a guy reaches climax while he is head banging me faster, the distance of my head from the wall shortens (maybe down to 3 inches), but the speed of the impacts increases. I'm sure some brainy math nerd can figure out some equation that explains this, but I was never good at the advanced math shit. But another reason why 5 to 6 inches is the ideal amount of space between my head and the wall has to do with the force needed to bang my skull hard enough. As we know in physics, every action is met by an opposite reaction. And if there is too much space between my skull and the wall, it takes more force from his thrusting to get my skull to make an impact hard enough to where it's going to produce that electrical buzz in my brain and cause the pain I crave. In other words, the further my skull is away from the wall, the more power from his thrust is used up on moving me backwards so that when impact finally occurs, it is not as hard as it needs to be. Think about rolling a big round boulder. Pushing it across level terrain takes a lot less force than if you had to push it up hill. The amount of force it takes to push that boulder 10 feet across level terrain would only maybe get the boulder to move 1 or 2 feet if it was pushed uphill. Same amount of energy, but it is distributed among different forces (including gravity and friction), and that same amount of energy results in different outcomes depending on the circumstances. Hopefully that makes sense, too. In other words, if my skull is too far away from the wall, too much of his thrusting power is spent (and in my opinion wasted) on pushing me backwards, so that when my skull finally makes contact with the wall, the impact is not as powerful. Again, there is probably a math equation to explain how being too close to the wall diminishes the impact of my skull, as the momentum of his thrust is shortened because my skull impacts the wall sooner when I am closer to it, and then the rest of that energy is absorbed by the back wall of my throat. And again I am not complaining about the kind of face fucking that bruises my throat. But when I'm with a head banger (and because they are so rare) I want to make sure the maximum impact is my skull hitting the wall simultaneous with his cock head impacting the back of my throat. Those two types of impacts together are truly magical for a sick cocksucker like me.
Of course I have had a lot of time to analyze this fetish over the past 8 or 9 years and I understand it a lot better the more experience I get. But back then, when this was all still relatively new to me (even though I was getting my head banged quite regularly by my buddy for several months), I didn't take the time to analyze or overthink things like I do now. I just figured out by experience that the optimal distance to move my head forward on his pull back strokes was 5 to 6 inches, and it gave me the feeling inside my brain that I started desperately craving.
So let's get back to this first experience with the cinder block wall in the garage. Like I said, it took less than 20 seconds for my buddy to build up a steady, consistent rhythm to his thrusting. Over the months we have been doing this, he has been conditioned to operate like a well-oiled machine. I made sure to follow his dick on his back strokes, pushing my torso toward him and drawing my head forward 5 or 6 inches to meet his next powerful thrust. When his hips thrusted forward his hard cock banged the back wall of my throat and the remaining energy of his thrust was used in pushing me backwards that 5 or 6 inches until the back of my head banged the wall good and hard. As his urgency to cum increased, his thrusts got slightly faster and a lot more forceful. When I closed my eyes I saw colors whenever my head banged the cinder block wall. At first it was a warm metallic green flash, sorta the color of the outer edges of the northen lights (if you've ever been lucky enough to see them). I'd see that light greenish metallic color for a millisecond whenever my skull hit the wall. As his thrusts got harder the colors got brighter and a bit more intense. As he would bang my skull even harder, I started to see some blue hues mixed with the green. I only saw these colors if I kept my eyes closed. And the colors only flashed when my skull hit the cider block wall hard enough to make them appear. Those warm flashes of metallic green and blue were surprisingly beautiful and very calming to me. Added to that was the dull sound of my skull hitting the wall in a soothing rhythm that was steady and constant like a heartbeat. The skull is not hollow, and it's actually quite compact. I can't really find a good comparison. I thought of melons, but if you knock on a melon with your knuckles, like you knock on a door, you get close to what I'm trying to describe. But melons are so much softer. The rind of a melon is not bone, and the flesh of the melon is not gelatinous gray brain matter. I thought about a bowling ball, but that is too hard. It has the right rigidness for the skull, but the thud of impact is not right because the inside of the ball is solid. So there really is no comparison to how it sounds and feels when your skull hits a hard object repeatedly for a sustained period of time. If you're curious enough, you will have to sit down with your back against a brick or cinder block wall and knock your own head into it to get the exact sound and feeling I am trying to describe. And this is a good time, perhaps, to bring up the topic of self-abuse. I already wrote about head banging and rocking as a kid. By the time I was 3 or 4 I had grown out of head banging and mostly self-soothed with rocking. It wasn't until I was in the bathroom getting my skull knocked against the bathroom vanity during one of my buddy's afterschool face fucks that I rediscovered the joys and pleasures and addictive properties of head banging. And by the end of this series you will know just how bad an addiction I have for this. But I have experimented quite a bit with doing it to myself by just sitting against a wall and rocking back and forth and knocking my skull against the wall, but it is so not the same. The sex part is too important. I need to be sucking on a cock and smelling a guy's balls and feeling his cock banging my mouth and throat and hearing him moan and grunt and get off on it. So that's all a part of it. If any component is missing, the craving cannot be satisfied.
So yes, this first time against the cinder block wall in the garage was magical. Not just because of the colors I saw for the first time, and the different sound my skull made as it banged the wall, and not just because of the stronger electric vibrations that buzzed through my brain once we got into that steady rhythm; no it was also magical because my buddy loved this as much as I did. He was getting off on the sounds and the vibrations he was experiencing as well, and it added to his pleasure and made his climax even more impressive and powerful. I became addicted to the sound and the electric buzz and the flashes of colors and the pain and the need to be used. He became addicted to the intensity of the orgasms he was having, and increasing his pleasure by knowing he was banging my head harder and hurting me and possibly causing damage, and also from knowing I was just sitting there letting him do it to me. He later confessed he found it hot that I wanted it so bad and so often. He no longer laughed at my desperation when I would scramble into place for him; he expected it and he'd smirk at my willingness to be such a sick twisted cocksucker for him. We were not into discussing this at length, but from time to time he was curious and asked questions. And he admitted he understood that as a fag (even though I was dating girls in high school) I enjoyed sucking his cock and swallowing his cum. But he never fully understood why I wanted him to hurt me and bang my head so hard while he fucked my face. I'm the one who overthinks things; he just accepts things as they are. And he decided he didn't need to understand why I wanted him to do this to me; he just focused on his selfish need to get off and doing whatever it took to have the best orgasms possible. For him that came to include hurting me and being more extreme and making me take harder head bangings just so he could increase the pleasure and intensity of his orgasms. It ended up being a good match. We were feeding 2 different kinds of addictions and getting what we both needed.
So he was thrusting at a good consistent, steady speed and my skull was hitting the wall good and hard over and over. He was urgent in his thrusting, trying to reach a powerful climax, focusing on the pleasure he was feeling in his cock and also in his mind knowing he was beating the back of my throat and banging my head into a cinder block wall. I was focused on providing good head, keeping a strong suction with my lips and pushing my flat tongue tight against the underside of his cock as his hips thrusted back and forth into my face. I was also focused on the electric buzz in my brain caused from the battering my skull was taking. And I was focused on the pain starting to build and increase as were the flashes of colors I was seeing every time my head banged the wall. And I focused on the sound my head made; the external sound of my skull bone knocking against a hard cinder block wall, and also the sounds from within my head that only I could hear. You know like when you hum, you don't just hear the sound coming from your lips like someone in the room who is hearing you hum; you also hear the humming vibrate through your head, through your nasal cavities, filling all the empty spaces in your skull. Cover your ears while you are humming and it sounds so much louder and different. That's how I was hearing my skull bang the wall: internally as well as externally. My skull banging the hard cinder block wall was very different from the bathroom vanity and also different from the hard wooden leg of the workbench. It was a different sound and a different feeling. And I'm pretty sure my buddy was hearing and feeling the difference, too. When he thrusted forward he drove my head back with force, and when my skull hit the wall the stop was sudden and complete. There was absolutely no give to the hard surface behind me. It created a dull thud that was for the most part very quiet, at least externally; but inside my head it sounded loud and it caused vibrations in my brain. After about three minutes it was starting to hurt. I'm sure a bruise was developing on the back of my head, but it would likely never show because my hair covered it, even though I kept my dark blonde hair pretty short, even back then. But it felt like a bruise was developing because the banging was hard and consistent and rhythmic, and my buddy was definitely on automatic pilot, lost in his own pleasurable sensations and focused on getting himself off. For my part, I wasn't completely submissive and "just taking it;" I was still rocking in rhythm with him, pushing my torso forward on his back strokes and even applying a little resistance so it would take more force for him to drive my skull back into the wall. It was that slight resistance that made everything work. He thrusted harder to push me back, and that additional force he had to exert drove my head into the wall harder. It was another one of those strange scientific, mathematical equations I spoke of earlier. It was finding the right amount of resistance on my part to make him thrust harder that drove my skull into the wall at the velocity needed to maximize the impact. You need to factor in the speed as well, and also the location and type of surface my skull is banging against. At the time I didn't think about all of that. I just learned more every time we did this. I figured out from experience how hard I needed my head to bang against the wall, and therefore I figured out just how much resistance I had to create once he started thrusting forward again. That resistance was one of the factors I could control. And for now he was also allowing me to control what surfaced we used. The speed and forcefulness of his thrusts, and the amount of time it took him to cum once we reached that awesome synchronized rhythm was always in his control and totally up to him.
So after about 3 minutes of banging my skull against the cinder block wall at a good, steady pace, my head was starting to hurt. The colors I was seeing whenever I closed my eyes were intensifying. I usually keep my hands at my side when we do this. I don't ever touch myself, and I never really touched him that much. But for some reason, as he was banging my head against the cider block wall, I reached up and put my hands on his ass. I guess in my mind, I wanted to feel the power of his thrusts through the tightening muscles of his ass. I didn't rub his ass or anything, I just placed my hands on his ass like there was just something natural to this, and I started pushing on his ass whenever he would thrust forward. I wasn't expecting any reaction really, but I got one. In his mind, I think, he took that as a nonverbal message from me to thrust even harder and faster. And that's exactly what he did. For the next 2 minutes he face fucked me harder than he had in a long time, and my head was now banging that cinder block wall harder and faster. The pain and the buzzing inside my head intensified even more. At one point the pain made me lose concentration and I gagged on his cock. Usually I can control my gag reflex pretty good. But when the face fucking is really rough, and I'm experiencing pain from the head banging, my concentration drops and I miscalculate my breathing and start to run out of air which always makes me panic, and then I start gagging. But my gagging just made him fuck my face even harder and faster. The sound inside my head was louder, so I'm sure the external sound of my skull banging the hard wall was also louder, and he could hear that whenever my gagging wasn't drowning it out. This went on at this level for another good 2 minutes or so, until he felt his orgasm approaching. Then like always, things intensified yet again for that final minute: faster, harder thrusting which always caused faster, harder head banging.
My brain was buzzing. My head was sore. My throat was bruised. I felt myself starting to get dizzy: maybe from the lack of air, maybe from the hard head banging, maybe from both. I could feel his body tensing up for a dramatic climax. His orgasm was eminent and just seconds away. Since we moved from the upstairs bathroom to the garage we were able to make more noise and he took advantage of the freedom to be more vocal. Mostly it was grunts of exertion and moans of pleasure; his grunting and breathing got louder as he worked harder to fuck my face and bang my skull, but he was actually working to get his nut and to give himself the most intense orgasm possible. And for him, I found out, going harder and faster at the end increased the intensity and power of his climax. And I considered myself lucky to be used by a guy who needed to intensify his thrusting as he grew closer to his orgasm. That last minute or so, and especially those 20 to 30 seconds right before he would ejaculate, were pure heaven for me. Painful? Yes. Scary? Sometimes. Because there was no stopping him. At that point he had to finish no matter what, and all I could do was submit and continue to provide suction on his cock and let him fuck my face and bang my skull as hard and as fast and as much as he needed to complete his orgasm with as much pleasure that he could possible get out of it. He deserved it. And the more we did this, the more force it took to provide him more pleasure than what he had the last time. I guess that's the definition of an addiction. It takes more and more to not only reach that high, but you crave more and more of it and want to take it farther and farther to get even more pleasure out of it. This was the first time using the cinder block wall in the garage and he nailed my skull to it during that last minute. He was a fury of thrusting power, and I kept pushing myself forward on his back strokes so he could repeatedly bang my skull against the wall as hard as he needed to get the sounds and the vibrations that would finally drive him over the edge and explode his hot cum in my mouth and down my throat. His moans were intensifying with his pleasure, and we both knew he was close. I heard him say at a level slightly above a whisper: "I'm gonna cum... I'm gonna cum... fuck...I'm... gonna...cum..." and this time he added "you sick motherfucking freak!" And with that final thrust he banged my skull real hard against the wall and pinned me there with his cock down my throat and blew his load while he moaned. That last bang of my skull made a loud thud and I saw a saw a flash of bright white in my head and my brain literally vibrated inside my skull. And it hurt, too. But I loved it.
And he loved the orgasm he just had. His knees went a little weak. His cock was still hard as I sucked out the last few drops of his load, with my sore skull still pinned to the wall and his cock down my throat. He pulled back and I gagged just as his cock head left my throat. I guess it triggered my reflex because I was out of air and almost panicking about passing out. Once his cock was out of my throat, I could breathe through my nose and still hold his now softening dick in my mouth as I gently sucked and cleaned it for him before he pulled it out of my mouth with a wet plop. I licked my lips and watched him pull up his pants from around his ankles; he took a step back and pulled up his underwear, tucking his cock away and then doing up his zipper and button and belt as I sat on the floor with my back to the wall watching him. Of course I thanked him. He smirked and shook his head and like a few times before he mumbled something about not understanding what I like about getting my face fucked so hard that my skull bangs something so hard like that. I wanted to ask if he enjoyed it. But I knew better. If he wanted to talk about his orgasm he would decide, not me. Plus based on those last few minutes and that intense ending, with his moans and what he said, and the power of his ejaculation that I felt throb through his cock while he was down my throat, I already knew he liked it and got a lot of pleasure out of this head banging face fuck session. And we both knew we wanted more and we'd be back here in the garage again real soon.
Once he stepped fully back I got up off the floor. Something about getting up made me feel dizzy. And I noticed my headache got worse. Not only was the back of my skull sore from banging the wall so hard, the front temples of my head were throbbing. I didn't tell him because I didn't want to ruin this. He had said early on, the first few times he banged my head on the bathroom vanity, that he didn't want to damage me. And I was afraid if he knew he just now made me a little dizzy, that I saw colors and had a bad headache, that he would want to tone things back down again. I didn't want things to tone down at all, because I was in head banging bliss. Mixed in with the dizziness and the throbbing headache was an exuberating feeling of being high; those endorphins and other brain chemicals were flowing and I swear to god I could feel them like electricity in my brain. It was like my skull was still vibrating long after he stopped banging my head against the wall. This would become the feeling I would crave and need it more and more. After he left I went inside the house. I thought about taking something for the headache but quickly changed my mind. He did this to me. He fucked my face and banged my head into the wall and gave me this headache and this sore throat. And I not only submitted and let him do this to me, I wanted it. I purposely scrambled in place in front of the cinder block wall in the garage and practically begged for this. And I thanked him for it afterwards. No, I wouldn't take anything to calm the headache. And I didn't want to kill the buzzing in my head. I went to my room and lay on my bed and thought about what we just did. When I closed my eyes I could still just barely see that metallic green color as I listened to the buzzing in my brain. After about 30 minutes, the colors and buzzing were all gone. My throat was still sore, the back of my skull was tender, and I still had a throbbing headache. It took a few hours for the headache to go away, and took about a day for my throat and the back of my head to feel better. By then, my buddy was back and we were both ready to do this again.
***If you want to make me see colors and give me a headache, please reach out to me. I want to talk to you and hopefully meet up. My name is Ian. My email is EvilScout1488@yahoo.com.