Chapter 9 The Schism
Warning Heavy Raceplay!
I had begun living two lives. To the world, my fellow students, my family, I was the straight, black academic with a beautiful girlfriend. But my forbidden lust for white men kept growing and growing. I had failed miserable in cutting Felix and the others out of my life. It was a sort of schism between my official and my secret life. Six weeks had passed since our return from the hay and straw class trip and our secret little games had become a regular thing. Oftentimes we would meet at Felix's place after school or late at night. Or at Chris' place, or somewhere outside. Sometimes one of them would call me up to meet at a toilet stall in the university. Sometimes we would all hang out together and things would turn sexual. It had happened so many times by now, I lost track. Most of the time it was either Felix or Chris, sometimes both, sometimes Ben too. However, they all strictly assumed the dominant part during our interactions. I was always the submissive. Always the one sucking their dicks. Always the one getting my ass fucked. I was always the only one who would never get off, who would never cum. It was never the other way around. In fact, after all this time, after having had so much sex, I kind of still considered myself a virgin, because, till this day, I hadn't fucked anyone. I hadn't even gotten my dick sucked. All I knew was the feeling of having white cocks in my mouth and being penetrated by them. I felt deeply humiliated that this was the only sexual experience I knew while the boys had received countless blowjobs from me and had dumbed load after load into my ass.
I was still in a relationship with Jessica, but we saw less of each other. Partly because she was learning a lot and because I was spending so much time with the boys. She didn't suspect anything though. We still haven't had sex. We only made out. I enjoyed the kissing, feeling her warm body, her softness. It was so different from the rough treatment and abuse I received from the guys. But still, something kept drawing me towards them over and over again. And I was troubled that this thing we had had become so regular, something quite normal. And I was worried how sex for me was becoming inseparably entwined with abuse, humiliation and racism. And which effects this might have on me.
Overall, we were kind of were a group again, like before hay and straw. We met often. However, the dynamic had changed. I was at the bottom of the hierarchy without doubt. I knew Felix, Chris and Ben were looking down at me. I knew they saw me as inferior. They often displayed their white supremacist convictions without inhibition. But mostly they looked down at me, because the considered me a faggot. But I was allowed to hang out with them. Drink beer with them. Smoke joints with them. As long as I knew my place. And when it was time and they needed to get off, I'd suck them or let them fuck me. Just as it pleased them.
It came to pass that we were hanging out at Chris' place on another Friday night. Felix and Ben were there too. It was a hot summer night and they were all just wearing boxer shorts. I was naked, as always. That has become a given. Felix and Ben were sitting on the couch watching football while I lying on the floor, licking their feet. I probably spend most of the time we were together like this. Chris was on his computer, chatting with girls. Once in a while he would show some hot chick he was talking to, to Felix and Ben. They were stunning. I was jealous, Chris could apparently have any girl. And in a sick way, I was proud at the same time. Proud that, despite him being able to have any girl, I was allowed to serve his dick. I know it sounds crazy, but this was how I felt.
Ben was rubbing his feet in my face as I heard Felix place his empty beer can on the table. "And there goes another. Tom. Get up and get me a new beer." I rolled to the side and got up. I had gotten used to serving them in this way. They would never get their beers themselves anymore. They'd just tell me to fetch them for them. I walked over to the fridge, got a nice cold one for Felix, walked back into the room and handed it to him. "Thanks, slave." Felix said. "Oh, and since you are here, you know how these beers run trough. And I really don't want to get up. So..." he unzipped his pants and pulled out his dick. I looked at him, slightly confused. He laughed. "Seriously dude? Do I have to spell out everything for you? Get your mouth on my dick and take my piss!" he said. My jaw dropped. "Really?" I asked. He laughed. "Why, does it excite you? Well, I don't care if it does or if it disgusts you. I don't want to get up, so you will drink my piss right now. Oh and you don't want to spoil Chris good furniture, so you better don't spill anything." He said.
I didn't say anything. I got on my knees in front of Felix, who was sitting on the couch, legs spread apart. I submissively moved my head towards his crotch and took his soft dick in my mouth. I kept it in there without moving and waited. After a few moments I felt Felix releasing a stream of warm, bitter piss in my mouth. He sighed in relief as his bladder was being emptied. I struggled to swallow fast enough, as more and more piss was being jetted into my mouth. I knew, if I spilled anything, they would probably beat me up. But it was just so much piss coming from Felix' dick. He had been drinking a lot of beer that night. "That's it" Felix said. "You're nothing but a fucking toilet." I felt Chris and Ben watching me, as I allowed Felix to humiliate me once again. I could feel Felix' stream subsiding and I drank up the last gulps of piss, that were still in my mouth. I pulled out his dick after he had stopped pissing and looked at it. It was still a little wet, so I liked the last remains of piss off of it. I went on licking him, hoping this could turn into a blowjob. I softly began to suck. But Felix pushed my head aside and stuffed his dick back into his pants. "Enough fag, you'll get my dick when I need to pee again!" he said. Ben and Chris laughed.
"I'll have mercy on you, Tom." Chris said, turning back to his computer. "These chicks on here have been making me crazy, my dick is semi-hard the whole time. I'll let you suck me while I chat with these bitches." Chris said. "Just crawl under my desk and stay there where I don't have to look at your stupid monkey face." He said. Felix and Ben laughed. How did they keep coming up with taunting ways to degrade and humiliate me? And why wasn't I putting a stop to this? I had had become such a slave for cock, that I just couldn't help it. I would endure anything, as long as I was able to continue to suck their sweat white dicks.
So I did as I was told, crawled underneath Chris' desk as he pulled down his boxers, dropping them to his ankles. As this was all he was wearing, he was now sitting naked in this chair, expect for a base cap on his head. He looked so fucking hot. Again, I was kind of proud, that he would let my suck his magnificent cock. Even though he wouldn't look at me while I was doing it. Even though I'd be virtually invisible, hidden under his desk while he was concentrating on some random hot chick. Even though I was just a warm mouth he would feel on his dick while being complemented by who knows how many girls, how hot, handsome and masculine he was. I still was happy, that I would be allowed to suck that beautiful white cock of his. So I went on, sucking his dick while he was totally ignoring me. Once in a while he told me to suck my balls, when he felt like he was getting to close, but didn't want to cum yet. Sometimes I could tell by myself, by paying attention to the contractions in his dick. Then I would move away from the head, lick his shaft or dive into his full bush of pubes and lick the base around his cock. I could do this for hours.
"Fuck, I need to pee too." Chris said. "Just piss into the nigger's mouth. He's already on your dick anyway" Felix responded without taking his eyes off the TV. "You want that nigger?" Chris asked from above the desk, not looking at me. I could only see him from his stomach below. I took his dick out of my mouth and said "Yes, Sir." I could hear him chuckle. "Good boy. Stop sucking me then. Just take my dick in your mouth and wait for it." He said. I did as he said, just as I had did with Felix earlier. And again, after a few moments, I felt Chris' piss jet into my mouth and just as I had swallowed it from Felix and I was now drinking up Chris' piss directly from his dick. After I had swallowed everything up I resumed sucking his dick, which had gotten soft during the pissing. But it didn't take long to grow hard again, thanks to my thick moist lips. I knew I had good lips for sucking dick.
I listened as Chris was commenting on the different girls, and Felix and Ben answering. No one asked me of course. I was feeling so ashamed. I should be sitting next to them, one of the bros checking out chicks together. Commenting, laughing, having fun. But that was not my place anymore. I had been reduced to nothing more than a warm mouth under a desk, simply providing pleasure to Chris, so he could get off. I was pulled out of my thoughts as I suddenly heard familiar voice coming from Chris speaker phones. Chris must have turned on the video chat. It took me a while to fathom it, but it was Jessica.
"Hey beautiful!" I heard Chris say. "How are you doing?" "Oh, not much and you" she responded. "Not much either, just hanging out with my boys Felix and Ben!" Chris said. "Is Tom with you?" she asked. "Of course not, I wouldn't be calling you if he was here!" Chris said and I could virtually hear that he was grinning by the way the words sounded. I was startled, confused and hence stopped sucking him. What was going on? What business did Chris and Jessica had video chatting with one another? I looked over to the couch, which I could see from underneath the desk. Felix and Ben kept watching football as if nothing was going on. As if this was somehow normal. But what was even normal these days? I knew Chris was flirting with all these girls. Was Jessica one of these girls? But how could that be? She was mine! What the hell was going on? I wanted to pull myself off of Chris dick, put he firmly pressed my head into his crotch, making me swallow his entire shaft deep in my throat. He held me there as I was struggling to breath. He shortly looked down at me and I nodded, signaling that I had understood. He let go of my head and I continued sucking. Jessica apparently didn't notice the little incident. They continued talking, and their conversation was becoming ever more flirtatious and salacious. I knew I had to keep on sucking Chris otherwise he would get violent on me, but I just could not believe what was going on. I was sucking the guy who was at the same time flirting with my girlfriend. Could this get any more fucked up?
"It's hot today, why don't you take you top off?" Chris asked Jessica through the video chat. "Chris, your friends are right there!" she said. "So, didn't stop you last time" he said, laughing. "Come on, just a little peek." He begged. "No, forget it!" she said. That's my girl, I thought, still with Chris' cock in my mouth. "I'll show you mine if you show me yours." He said in a coy voice. I could hear her giggle. I knew that giggle and I hadn't heard it from her for a very long time. "Well, okay..." she said. Okay? Okay what? I panicked. I could feel Chris big muscular hand push me off of his dick as he was standing up, proudly presenting his fully-erect manhood to my girlfriend. I was in shock. I could hear Jessica giggle again. "Why are you hard?" she asked. "Cause you are so hot! Come on, show me your perfect boobs, Baby!" Chris said into the camera. No! Jessica is not going to show him her tits. It can't be. "Wow, you are so gorgeous, Babe! I love how smooth your breast look!" he said. I was panicking. But I couldn't move. I was like frozen. My heart was feeling like it was being squeezed.
"Do you like this dick?" Chris asked. "Stop it!" Jessica said, giggling again. "I know you do!" he said, as he began jerking it. "I know how much you like big white cocks, Jesse!" he said and Jessica, giggling again. "I sure do, but hush! Don't tell anyone!" she said. Chris laughed and very briefly looked down at me cowering underneath the desk, while his muscular tall body and his magnificent big cock were triumphantly towering over me. "Oh don't worry, Babe, who would I tell?" he said, with an arrogant smile. I was in complete shock.
Chris turned back to Jessica. "Jesse Baby, just looking at you makes me wanna cum so badly!" he said. I thought girls would be disgusted by such blatant sexualization. And Jessica usually was totally appalled by this kind of talk. But now I could hear her speaking in a whispering tone into the microphone. "Do it for my babe!" she said. I couldn't believe it. "Will you do a little striptease for me?" Chris asked. "Oh, and please, sing that sexy song while you do it." I was freaking out. What the hell was going on? But before I had time to realize what was happening, Chris sat down again, his dick now once more in front of my face an out of sight of the camera. And I did the unthinkable. I grabbed his hard cock and jerked it several times. And as I heard Jessica's sweet voice coming from the speakers, seductively singing, knowing she had begun to strip for Chris' eyes only, I took his white cock back into my mouth and began to suck him off while he was watching my girlfriend's sexy body. I could not sink any lower, I thought to myself.
"Yeah Jessie, play with your titties, just like that, you are so fucking hot, girl" For Jessica it must have looked like Chris was jerking, because he had his hand under the desk. But actually his hand was on my head, reinforcing his power over me as I was sucking him off. This was so crazy: Jessica, dancing and posing naked for him to turn him on. Me sucking his cock to make him cum. Two black bodies, male and female, submitting to the lust, pleasure and entertainment of this arrogant white man. "Oh baby, you are so fucking hot, I'm gonna cum!" Chris screamed and next thing I knew, he was unloading in my mouth. And I swallowed it desperately, hungry and full of shame. How could I have let this happen? I should have gotten up immediately. Stand up to him, Punch Chris in the face and claim what was mine. But only didn't I do that. Even worse, I made Chris cum while he was watching my girlfriend on cam. He had turned me into something like a cuckold. And he had, beyond doubt, made me endure a new level of humiliation I could not have imagined before.
I was still lost in my thoughts as he pulled his dick out of my mouth and pushed me away with his right foot, making me fall over. "Good night, babe, talk to you soon." Chris said into the camera, his lips forming a kiss. "Good night, handsome." I heard Jessica giggle and then I could hear her log off. Everyone bursted out in laughter immediately. "Dude, I can't believe you did that. That was a little cruel, even for my taste." Felix said. Chris laughed. "It's not like I planned this." He said. "Hey Tommy, sorry about that, but your girlfriend is just so fucking hot." He said to me. I was still in shock. I slowly stood up and held on to the desk. "I can't believe this." I stuttered. "Dude, sorry man, I know this was kind of sick. I guess you must be hurting now and shit. But, if it's any conciliation, it was fucking awesome for me!" Chris laughed. Ben shook his head. I was shacking. I was overwhelmed by what had just happened. My two neatly separated worlds got mixed together in a complete mess. I felt the schism breaking. I felt like everything was falling apart under the arrogant laughter of these white boys. My head was spinning, I was drowning in confusion, as the sound of Ben's voice and his zipper opening suddenly pulled me out of my thoughts. "Yo slave, get on my dick, gotta piss!"