+++++++++Grandpa's Mirror - 9
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I awake in the middle of the night. I open my eyes and see nothing but dark. I wave my hand in front of my face. Nothing. I have to piss. I feel around for my phone and the screen nearly blinds me. I point it to the floor. My blankets are pooled down there and my underwear too. It seems my dreams are allergic to them.
I can hear the big sleeping breaths of Hudson sleeping in my bed. I ignore him and my bare state and go over to the little wood stove. The cold makes me shake as I put some paper and wood in. I light the little stove and hear the paper turn to a crackle of little wood. I wait as heat starts to pour off. I have held my bladder as much as I can. I leave my clothes behind and get my torch.
I piss around the corner. I shake so bad my stream dances all over the yard. I finally finish and run inside. The little stove is starting to kick off a little more heat. I put my underwear back on and get the blanket, wrapping it around me. I wait for the stove. Finally I feel warm enough to try sleeping again.
I toss. I turn.
Finally sleep takes me. Finally I dream. Monsters return, but they seem friendly enough. Then they aren't. Then, as dreams shift from scene to scene without making any sense or any meaning they end with a noise.
Knocking.
"Come in." I hear my voice before thinking.
"Carter. I brought you some breakfast." Grandma's voice says and my eyes open. I'm naked again. I squirm under the thread bare blanket.
"Grandma, I'm not decent." I say.
"I know. Hudson said you had your pencil sticking out while you slept. He ususally lies, but for some reason, that time I believed him, and look, here you are." She huffed with a mischievious smile and dug into the basket she was carrying.
"Here." She says as she digs out a plate, settings and steaming hot food that instantly filled the room with the smell bacon followed by freshly baked bread and eggs. It all smelled so delicious.
"Thanks Grandma." I pull the blanket down so I can free my arms and hands to eat, "You've never done this before."
"You slept in. You've never done that before. And we've never had to deal with Hudson before either. I thought you would want to start the day off on the right foot and besides, if I can't spoil my grandson, then who can I spoil? Get et. After, come down to the house, get clean and we can go to town."
"Thanks Grandma." I say.
"Stop being so thankful and get your naked little butt in gear." She smiles at me and closes the door behind herself as she leaves.
I eat breakfast in bed. Grandma even gave me a big mug full of coffee, triple sugar and double cream. As the food hits my stomach, everything begins to feel more normal, more grounded.
I dress. I shower. I climb into the back of the truck, Grandpa drives, Grandma rides shotgun and I sit in the back with Hudson. He seems pretty quiet this morning and I sure as fuck don't want to say anything to make him talk.
We get to Grandma and Grandpas' little town. It's really small, but has a little mall with ten or twelve stores and little lunch spot. Grandpa gives us lunch money. I don't tell him we have our own.
Hudson says, "C'mon Uncle Frank, you know my folks are flush. We probably got more money than you and all my Aunts and Uncles combined."
Grandpa doesn't roll his eyes. I can see him flinch. He says, "Well, then, my hospitality seems totally unnecessary." He takes his money back and stuffs it in his wallet and says to both of us, "You guys go buy whatever and poke around. We will pick you up at three at the South entrance."
They drive off to do their town business. As soon as we clear the mall doors, I pick the direction opposite of Hudson. I spend the morning buying a pair of nice sunglasses and avoiding him. I screw up. He catches me sitting down eating food at the food court.
He sits down, "Yah, Carter. I think you you think you know me. But I can surprise you. I think I've changed."
I am skeptical but try to sound fine, "Oh?"
"I am okay with same sex sex."
"That's nice." I give nothing for him to work with.
"So when we get back to the farm, if we get time, I think I want a blowey."
"A what now?"
"I will let you give me a, you know, a blow job."
"You think that I want to do that?"
"I will let you. I can be ready to have more sex after dark. I just need to drink water."
"No."
"What? I am trying to be nice here Carter."
"No. I'm not doing that."
"Hey. I'm just trying to make some peace here. If you want to keep being mad at me for no reason, that's up to you Carter. In the mean time, I'm going to go buy some nice jeans. Expensive ones. The kind you don't wear." Hudson turns his nose up and walks away like some sort of diva. I roll my eyes.
I am pretty sure he's just joking.
The mall is pretty small and I end up in the same stores a couple of times before the timer runs out. The back of my mind is fired up, what if Hudson was serious. Part of me entertains the idea of blowing him. That part gets shot down by cold hard logic that he's an asshole. My imagination runs wild. He could set up a camera and try to black mail me. He will expect blow jobs from all his cousins. He won't stop at a blow job. He will want the full meal deal. The skin prickles up on my neck. He might force himself on me. He might turn into an ugly killer before he's finished highschool.
My feet wander and see the sign, "South Entrance." I check the time. I'm early. I step out into the fall air. There's a chill. I pull up my coat and hear shouting a little ways in the parking lot. A crowd of kids are shouting, like a fight at school.
I walk up. Hudson's face is rage. He's fighting five other guys. They are older, bigger. He kicks one in the knee. He spins. He throws a punch and his feet move. He is always out of their range. They get in each other's way.
They are angry.
Everyone is shouting. Hudson feigns a punch, the guy ducks the other way and Hudson connects with his jaw. The guy falls. One by one they all end up laying on the ground, until the last one, the biggest one, runs at Hudson and tries to tackle him. Hudson grabs him, rolls and falls onto his back, his arms grabbing the guy's arms and his legs shoot out into his groin. Hudson kicks and the tackling guy's momentum makes him sail over top of Hudson. He arcs and flumps on the pavement, landing square on his back.
In a flash Hudson climbs on top of his chest straddles him and begins hitting the downed kid. It's obvious his fight is out and he is bordering unconscious.
I step up and grab Hudson from behind. I say, "Stop. Stop. You won. Stop hitting him. You won." Hudson lets me pull him off.
Hudson is not calm. He taunts them, "C'mon Mother Fuckers. You want to fuck with the bull, you get the horns. C'mon Fags! Get up." He goes around and kicks one. The bystanders are friends of the fallen boys. They wait, not wanting to attract Hudson's wrath. He kicks a few of them a few more times and seems to be calming down the smallest bit.
I see Grandpa's old truck pull into the parking lot, "C'mon Hudson. Let's go. We should go. We got to go. We got to go, now!" I shout the last. He spots the cop car entering from the other side and decides that my urge to go is a good idea.
We sprint to the truck and get in. I am not out of breath, "Hi Grampa, Grandma."
"You two are sure in a hurry. I hope you boys had a good time." Grandma says. It's pretty obvious they are not in the loop, as we turn out of the parking lot. The cop cars lights go on as I try not to make it obvious I am using the big mirrors to see behind us. We put a few corners and a couple kilometers behind us and the big fight. I relax.
"So you boys have any plans to fill this afternoon? I am sure you are almost bored to death of poking around the farm yard by now." Grandma is curious.
My mind races. I remember Hudson's demand for me to give him a blow job fills me with dread. He pipes up, "I think we are going to just hang at the green granary. Maybe watch a movie." He has a twinkle in his eye as he winks at me.
I let out a huge sigh and Hudson wipes a little sweat from his cheery face. He really thinks that I am going to blow him. The rest of the ride is silent. I am torn between getting beaten to a pulp and giving a blow job. It's not that he's not hot. He has curves in all the right places. His board has some spring, that is to say if he weren't such a shit head, he would be totally fuckable. His banana has a curve to it. I remember giving it a few strokes when his soul was behind the mirror. The insides don't match the outsides.
Dread.
That's the only thing I can think of how I'm feeling. Dread. Dread of what's going to happen. I think I will open my mouth and let the little fucker fuck my face. I won't like it. It will suck. Or I will tell him to go fuck himself and he will beat me to death. Maybe I'm being dramatic.
The familiar farm house comes into view. It will be good to get out of the truck. My phone goes off.
"Dude" Lucas texts. He doesn't explain anything, but just connects. With it the memories. His trust in me, in the mirror, in the pool. He is the best. The past moments of problems, I haven't seen him in a long while. He felt like a best friend before, a soul mate. His spark lit my fire. Everything about the boy flies into my head. Him and me. He tugged me. I tugged him. We went to the other side. He is fine by any measure.
"Sup" I text. It's lame. He probably doesn't care.
"My boy." Lucas texts back.
"Yeah. Thanks. I got big problems."
"You can handle him. You can handle anything." His faith in me does something to me. I went to the other side, the mirror, fucked a goat, a boy and a few other things, and here I am.
"Thanks. I don't know about this time, though." My doubt runs through my fingers and into the SMS text.
"Sounds big. Listen. I'm out of town this weekend, but maybe next weekend I could come into the city and we could hang at your house."
Buoyed by a future of fun with Lucas for a weekend I text the parents to ask and brace myself for the afternoon's frivolity of avoiding Hudson, or sucking his dick.
The truck stops and I open the door and book it to the farm yard. I hear Hudson a few steps behind me. Running into the barn is a good idea, there's a little door in the back. He's as fast as I am. Being on the soccer team, I have endurance, maybe I can out run him.
Running releases some of the tension I feel. Every step, every breath that burned my lungs added some clarity to the world. I lost track of Hudson. The farm is an obstacle course of pens, fences, fields, out buildings for llamas, sheep, pigs, ducks, chickens, turkeys and of course, goats.
I am not sure where my answer came from, if it is because I can barely breathe, or that I am on the farm running from my cousin, but I stop. I breathe. I walk back to the green guest house, my guest house. I am sweaty, tired and hot in the cool fall air. The sun is getting lower in the sky. It's still early afternoon, but feels later because of the fall change.
I cool down. I walk. I open the door. The afternoon shadows are long and the mirror sits in the corner. Hudson is laying on the couch looking at his phone. His fly is undone and his boy is sitting out.
"There you are. I was just doing some prewarm up." He smiles at me. He looks at his sex. I look too. I can't help it. A quick glance.
"There. See? I told you I am okay with dudes touching. I'm ready."
"Why were you fighting with all of those guys back in town?" I ask trying to change the subject.
"What? Those guys? They were nothing. Don't worry about it."
"Were they trying to steal from you?"
"They looked at me and asked if I wanted to make something of it. I might have called them a few things. It happens all the time. You didn't need to to pull me off them. I saw the cop car. I knew what was going on. Don't worry about it. Worry about the problem at hand." He points at his meat that has gone full mast.
I think about it. I don't want to. He's a bully and I'm not playing into that.
At all.
I'm not okay with any of it. My plan B comes up and out. I pull my phone out of my pocket.
"No." My voice is firm.
"No? You say no. I say yes. I think it would be a great appatizer for later. Look. I let you see me and I swear, I like it now."
"This should be no surprise to you, Hudson, I don't want to suck your dick. I am not going to suck it. You can just go into the mirror and find the girl or boy of your dreams."
"Stop saying I'm a fag. I just said I would let you, I didn't say I liked it." He does a reversal. I hold myself from rolling my eyes. I go through my files and find what I am looking for. I press play and hold out the phone for him to see. His eyes are glued to my little screen.
The screen is terrible quality at first, but once it clears and Hudson's eyes open in recognition of his own naked body fucking a person. He doesn't remember her, but he recognizes himself. He's fucking a woman, a demon woman, but a woman who has teeth in her nipples. And her Clit. And in the video, he's about to find out how painful that is going to be. But the video ends and he can't see himself before he gets mounted by the demons brother. He also can't remember any of it either.
His face distorts through the emotions. The last one is rage. I am thinking of words to say to him, how I was going blackmail him. If he didn't stop fucking with me I was going to fuck with him. My mouth begins to move when I am hit by a freight train. I flinch, I intend to move, but I am too late. I pile backward, my phone leaves my hand.
I try to hit him back. I try to defend myself. I feel something under my hand. I instinctively pick it up and in a flash swing where I think his head is. I find myself grabbing onto a piece of firewood. A splinter is burried into my hand and there is blood.
I hit Hudson on the head with some wood and he is only set back a little. I zag out of the way, but he's quick and catches part of me awkwardly. I fall on the floor and roll.
Things happen so fast. I find my phone again. It's in my other hand. Hudson is yelling something at me. I come to the realization that I might die because I am not ever going to suck Hudson's dick.
I throw my phone. It leaves my fingers. I guess I hope it is going to hit Hudson in the head and end my problems.
He ducks.
The phone sails through the air and is travelling to the mirror. Grandpa's mirror. Grandpa's pornographic mirror. The mirror that magically tranpsorted me to a place where I could fuck animals. Men. Boys. Girls. I still want to get to the last kind. But the phone flies. It travels towards the oval mirror. The gental oval is a shape from times long past. The carvings of oak sit on each side of the mirror. The boy holds flowers. He's naked. The goat boy has big balls and a funny little smile on his face.
The phone flies past Hudson and hits the glass. Time slows. I see all of the glass bow, like there is some sort of hope that the magic in the glass, in the mirror is strong enough to withstand the everyday regular physics that we live by. And why not? I was transported to a naked psychotic sex fueled party every time I touched the mirror in the right way. I had adventures, and not just alone.
The glass bows in as the phone hits it. The equilibrium between flex and break moved and time resumed it's usual flow.
Explosion.
I am knocked backwards onto my back, there is no more slow motion. I feel myself cough. I look over and Hudson is laying on his back the same as me.
Ringing.
Things happen slowly after that. Hudson staggers to his knees coughing. I roll over onto my stomach. I can't explain the blast. I can't explain the pain that wracks my body. I can't explain Hudson writhing and crying.
The door opens and Grandpa arrives first. He surveys the scene. His face is concern, worry. He looks at me. Confusion. He looks around the room. His face registers different degrees of concern, but none of it he understands. Grandma enters the room.
"I got Carter!" Grandpa says, "Get Hudson."
"What the hells!?" Grandma asks. Grandpa doesn't answer. I am lifted. I float in Grandpa's safe arms. His shambly old arms are strong as he carries me out of the green granary and sets me down on the grass. The sun has a little life left. My head hurts. My ears ring.
Grandpa goes back into the green granary and Grandma, Grandpa and Hudson come out. Hudson looks pale and afraid. He looks like a little boy. He looks like I feel, scared, confused and small.
Grandma cusses to no one in particular, "Well, Shit."
Grandpa looks me in the eye asks, "What was that?"
I think he is talking to me. The tears, the pools of deep emotion dammed up unleash in a torrent of tears. I sob and blubber. Grandpa hugs me.
The storm of grief finally subsides. I am still outside of the green guest house. I get the courage to look inside. It's a mess. The glass of the mirror has embedded into every surface, the ceiling, the opposite wall, the floor, the bed, the couch, the room in it's entirety has bits of glass embedded into it. The window Grandpa hacked into the green granary was blown away, the glass shards lay visible in the grass outside and into the next out building.
Grandpa grabs me by the shoulders and looks me in the eye, his deep blue eyes have turned gray and cold. He says, "Tell me everything."