HELLO! Welcome to lucky chapter 13. This chapter contains a song reference. If you like classic rock or folk music, I highly recommend you listen to Delaney and Bonnie and their version of 'Only You Know and I Know' at the appropriate point in the story. You don't have to, but you can if you want. I hope you enjoy the chapter! Drop me a line if you want. I'd be happy to hear from you.
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Crown Vic to a Parallel World: From Whence I Came The second installment of the ongoing adventures of Church Philips
13
Only You Know and I Know
Dinner was delicious but strained. Andy and Shawn had made a huge tray of macaroni and cheese with stewed tomatoes and mixed vegetables on the side. We ate in near silence. I felt like I was at a funeral luncheon.
I spent half the meal staring at my nieces. Hannah and Leah were toddlers when I saw them last, and I never paid them much attention. The old Church didn't have much time for my holier-than-thou sister, her squeaky douchebag husband, or her drool covered kids. Now that the twins were old enough to have recognizable features and the beginnings of a personality, I found them vaguely interesting. The more I studied them, the more they bothered me. Something about them, that I couldn't put my finger on, didn't sit well with me.
The girls were well-behaved enough for children in their single-digit years. They didn't play with their food or squeal like typical little girls. They seemed very much absorbed in eating and in each other. I assumed their lack of `she's touching me, she's touching me' banter had to do with their being twins.
I watched them and watched them until I finally realized what was bothering me. Their appearance didn't make sense. They both had most of Mary's fine features and petite build, but instead of Mary's light skin and brown hair, or Zeke's light skin and blond hair, the girls had an olive cast to their skin and black hair so curly, it fell in tight, natural ringlets all over their heads.
If they had been anyone else's kids, I would have assumed a mailman was involved, but this was Mary I was thinking about. The idea of her having an impropriety, especially one that resulted in her twins, just wasn't possible. I chalked the kids' coloring up to a recessive gene and directed my attention elsewhere. When we finished eating, Andy and the twins went in the living room to watch a movie while the adults cleaned up and returned to the dining room to sit in silence.
I sat with my left elbow on the table and my fist under my chin. My right hand fidgeted with my bracelet. Joe watched me play with the golden band. It seemed to stir something in his head. He interrupted the vigil with a question. "Church, Shawn, we missed your wedding reception. Would you tell us about it?"
I wasn't sure that Joe had picked the right topic. Mary's marriage was disintegrating rapidly, and Joe had asked Shawn and me about the beginning of our wedded bliss. Shawn started the story while I was still debating. "It was eighteen months after the first mission, the one to the Demon's Citadel, the one that brought us together. Church was fully recovered; he had been for a while. He looked incredible."
Shawn looked at me with admiration and a tingle of lust. I enjoyed the feeling of being admired. Shawn kept his eyes on me as he told his story. "We were taking pictures in the back garden of the ceremonial hall. He...Church was talking to the photographer a little way away from me. I'd been admiring the flowers when the photographer's voice changed like he was giving instructions. I looked up to make sure I didn't miss anything."
Shawn held his left hand out to me across the table, the golden band on his wrist made a hollow sound against the vinyl tablecloth. I took his hand with mine, both bands glinted in the overhead light. He met my eyes with his and told the story like he was talking directly to me.
"That's when I saw him standing in the late-afternoon sun. That big, attractive man, with his long brown hair shining. He shifted the way he was standing and the muscles in his broad back flexed under the thin linen of his lavender suit. He turned to face me. He realized he was being appraised and smiled that self-conscious little smile he has for those moments. He fidgeted with the gold bracelet I had just sealed to his wrist and looked me right in the eye. I knew he was all mine; his body, mind, and spirit and all the pleasure, compassion, and love that went with them. He was all mine, and he was everything I wanted. In that moment, I was complete."
Shawn got a little lost in thought and trailed off. I squeezed his hand to bring him back to the present. "Ahem...uh...anyway," he continued, "after the ceremony and the photos we went into a different part of the hall for the reception. It was a more intimate room with mirrored walls, a big dance floor, table seating around the perimeter, and a big bar at the back. Divided Light, or a fraction of it, was set up on a small stage at the front of the dance floor. We waited for all the guests to find their spots before we went in. It was to be our first dance as an official couple, and we wanted it to be special."
Shawn took his eyes from mine to check on his audience as he told the story. "Church and I took dancing lessons the year before. It was for his therapy, but it was fun to. I knew how to dance before, but I never had any formal lessons. We had it all timed out and practiced. The band started and we entered on the opening line of the song we picked out."
I had a silly idea and stopped Shawn's story with a squeeze of his hand. "You want to show them?"
"What about the music?"
I borrowed Joe's phone and stuck it in a phone dock with speakers that I had seen in the sunroom. When I had the tune cued up, I called Shawn in. We stayed out of sight from the dining room through the opening riff of the detuned acoustic guitar and danced into view in time to the first lyric.
Delaney Bramlett sang `Only you know and I know' as we glided across the hardwood floor framed by the oversized arch between the dining and sunrooms. The dance was a sort of exaggerated waltz, stylized and sped up. We sang along, like we had that night. Shawn sang Delaney's part, and I sang Bonnie's in ask and answer fashion. We held each other close and the last four years seemed to disappear.
We moved together like we had on that night, the first night we officially belonged to each other. Shawn sang Delaney's words of pleading to not overthink something as simple as love. I looked into the frozen blue of his eyes and sang back with Bonnie's self-deprecating lyrics about the mad worry of being in love. We dueted the reassurance that everything would work out, as long as we were together, and as long as we didn't let the past and our own insecurities get in the way.
The song was perfect for us. It said everything we wanted to say about what we meant to each other, and it spoke to the importance of communication and trust. I loved Shawn and felt his love as I danced with him and sang to him. He felt perfect in my arms as he moved with me, as he loved me back. Holding him was like holding my reason for being. With him, anything was possible, without him, there was nothing.
When the music ended, and the dance was over, we stopped moving but didn't separate. Our eyes stayed locked and, to me, nothing in the room, nothing in the whole world existed but Shawn. I leaned him back, holding him tight to my body and supporting his head in the palm of my right hand, my fingers nested in his thick, black hair. I tilted my head and kissed him deeply, with my eyes open, like I had then. He seemed to melt in my arms as he kissed back.
A sharp whistle from Bem shattered the moment and brought us out of the dream. I stood, pulling Shawn up with me, and we parted, both more than a little embarrassed at getting carried away. Our unintended audience at the dining room table seemed to be embarrassed with us. Awkward silence stretched out until Bem came to the rescue. He whistled and clapped. Beyond the table, I saw Andy crane his head to look from the living room. He gave me a covert thumbs-up and a smile. Mary sat with her chin in her hand and looked forlorn. Joe's expression and posture remained unchanged.
Shawn and I took an awkward little bow. I got Joe's phone from the speaker dock and returned it to him as we sat at the table. "After that," Shawn resumed the story like our dance hadn't happened, "it was like most other receptions. Our friends congratulated us, my Uncle Ars made a long speech with no point, everyone ate and drank."
Shawn paused his story long enough to offer his hand to me across the table again. I took and held it. His thumb made little circles around the tops of the knuckles it could reach. "About half-way through the party, Church took me to the vestibule of the building, away from the crowd. He was super excited, but he wouldn't say why. I kept asking him what he wanted, but all he would tell me was one of the gifts had arrived late and he needed help with it."
"We waited in the little entryway and watched the parking lot. Headlights swung off the road and a car moved down the driveway, through the lot, and up to the entrance. Church hustled me outside and up to the car. He opened the back door, and helped my mother get out." Shawn paused again to explain why it was surprising for his mother to be at his wedding. "I don't get along with my father. He always mistreated my mother and me. She wouldn't leave him, and it broke my heart when I moved out and left her there to face him alone. When she got out of that car...that was one of the biggest shocks of my life."
"She hugged me and kissed my forehead. I left him.' She announced. Church invited me to the wedding. I didn't know what to do. I thought about it until today. When I brought it up to your father, he made a joke of it. That was what I needed. I packed a bag and left him. I'm sorry I'm late.'"
"I was beside myself. After I hugged her again, Church told us both what he'd arranged in the few hours he'd had between when my mother called to tell him she was coming and when we left for the ceremonial hall. Neb had moved out of our building recently. She went to live with her then boyfriend, and now husband, Calidi. That left the third-floor apartment empty. My mother was moving into it. Church coordinated with our caretaker, Met, and already had a complete apartment update scheduled and an appointment for my mother to select the colors she wanted and all new furniture. In the meantime, he'd rented a suite for her at a nearby hotel. That was the first time she'd ever taken a stand for herself or for me. It was the nicest present I ever received."
Shawn started to tear up at the memory and struggled to continue speaking. I finished the story. "We spent the rest of the night dancing and catching up with people we don't see often enough. We finally got to meet Cy's wife and kids. He was so proud of them. His brother Vulp shocked everyone by giving us a toast with more innuendo leering around the edges than I thought was possible for anyone but Bem. Shawn's Uncle Ars got ridiculously drunk, stretched out on a buffet table, and went to sleep."
"At the end, we left to the loud cheers of our friends. Bem and Vulp had rigged-up a fireworks display that was to go off as our car went down the driveway. Something went wrong, at least that's what he claims." I spared a look of disbelief in Bem's direction. He met it with one of complete innocence. "It was more like a gauntlet of bombs than a shimmering curtain of color. We laughed later, but it was terrifying at the time."
"We pushed our honeymoon plans back for a month so we could get Shawn's mother settled, and so they could reconnect. When the month was up, we left for what we thought would be a year-long tour of Solum. Unfortunately, everywhere we go, Shawn's uncle sends us on missions. We've been on tour for four years and still haven't seen everything we planned to in the first twelve months. We're stopping it though. When we get back, I'm growing roots like a tree."
"It will be so nice to be home for a while." Shawn agreed quietly.
I glanced around the table for reactions. Mary was still doing her best `Thinker' impression and Joe's expression was unreadable. He spoke first. "That was a very nice story, guys, but I have a question."
`Of course, you do.' I thought.
"How is it that your wedding song, on another world, was a Delaney and Bonnie cover of a Dave Mason tune from nineteen seventy?"
I laughed, mainly at the fact that Joe had managed to seize on the one part of the story that was the least incredible. Something about Joe's question struck me and I had to ask my own before I answered his. "How do you know Delaney and Bonnie? They don't get much radio play. Come to think of it, how do you know that song is a Dave Mason song? I don't ever remember you caring much for rock music. I thought you were a jazz only guy."
"Ask your nephew." Joe replied. "He's the music expert around here. Now, what about my question?"
I filed Joe's statement about Andy into the back of my mind and set about answering Joe's original question. "Funny story there. When I was in the hospital right after the first mission, I told a bold lie to get my doctor interested in my team-mate and friend Neb. They were both musically inclined and decided to be a couple and a band. I was their resource for unique music. I wrote down all the lyrics I could remember from the songs I knew by heart and offered them all the CDs I had in my car. The band they formed, Divided Light, has been touring almost continuously ever since. They're completely dominating the Solum music scene. All they play is stolen classic rock and Motown soul."
Joe rubbed his neck. "The more I hear, the stranger it gets." He muttered, then raised his voice to address the group. "Alright," he clapped his hands, "back to reality. Sleeping arrangements need to be figured out."
I offered to give up the master bedroom and camp with Shawn and Bem in the living room. Mary raised an objection because my offer didn't fit what she thought she knew about the sleeping arrangements at the house. "I thought Bem was using my room." She said as she recalled the offer Joe had made in her presence two days before.
"They're all in the Master." Joe explained.
Mary directed her confusion at me. "How did you fit a cot in there with Joe's king bed and all that big furniture?"
"We didn't." I explained without explaining anything.
"Then, where are the three of you sleeping?" Mary pressed.
Joe waved his hands like he was flagging a passing truck. "Mary, just skip it. Your room is available to you and the girls can use the sofa bed in the family room. Does that work?"
Mary wanted to say something, but she deferred to Joe and let it lay. I was glad. I wasn't in the mood to defend my lifestyle again. Everyone left the table and went to their assigned sleeping spot without additional discussion or incident.
When we got behind closed doors, it became clear that Bem was feeling better. As soon as I laid down, he pounced on me and licked the side of my face with the flat of his tongue. Luckily, Shawn was in the bathroom, so we didn't have to see his professional scowl. I pushed Bem off me and sat on the edge of the bed. "Bem, I can't, and you know it. You have to be completely cleared by the doctor before we get up to anything."
"I know," Bem whined as he moved to sit next to me, "but I feel fine, and I miss you."
I objected to how `fine' he was. "This is only the first day you could even stay awake all day. I'm not the doctor, but I don't think you're up to it either." I had my hands in my lap. The hands wouldn't stay still. They played with my bracelet. It was another situation where I wished I could play with my watch, but I couldn't because I'd left it in the pocket of the pants I'd taken off.
"You're just mean." Bem verbally pouted like a child being told not to spoil his appetite in the candy store.
I turned to look in his pouting face so I could give him some grief for testing my resolve. "If you think for one second that this has been easy for me, you're wrong." I complained. "Sleeping pressed to your lithe body every night is filling my head with all the ways it could be used for our mutual enjoyment, but I'm not risking being cut off from Shawn for anything. You talk to him. If he says it's OK, I'll wear you out."
Bem leered at me and rubbed my thigh with his busy hands. "Ooohhh...you think you can?"
"I'll do it or die trying. What a way to go!" I teased.
Bem went serious on me. "Ugh. You guys are killing me. Sleeping between the two of you has been the nicest and most frustrating experience of my life. I noticed you started wearing a shirt to bed. Thanks. If your bare skin was against me all night, I would've gotten us in a lot of trouble."
Bem leered again, then he slid off the bed to stand in front of me while he talked. "You know, you and Shawn have been really good to me. When Neb and Calidi said I needed to go home, I fought them. The closer I got to your apartment, though, the more I knew they were right. I missed you guys and needed some quiet time. When I struggled up to your door, I knew that all I had to do was knock, and the door would open, and you would take care of me."
I pulled Bem into a hug and held him against me. His ribs still felt like piano keys under my hands, but less so than before. "The door will always be open to you. You could've called and we would have come running. Anywhere you are, any trouble you're ever in, you can count on us to help."
"Thanks, Church, it's nice to hear you say it." Bem crawled into my lap and straddled my legs so he could press his body to mine.
"How did you even know we'd be home?" I asked. "You might've knocked at an empty apartment if Ars hadn't called us for this mission."
Bem pulled back from our hug, just enough to look in my face. "I didn't plan on asking for help when I left. I was too angry to think straight. I called Met to let him know I was coming so he'd have my place ready. He told me you guys would be there. The closer I got, the worse I felt. I knocked on your door because I was lonely and sad and sick. I don't think I could've spent that night alone."
The bathroom door opened, and Shawn came out. He saw Bem and me in our affectionate position and glared at us. "What's going on here? There better not be anything strenuous happening."
I lifted Bem out of my lap and turned him to face Shawn. I put on my best innocent face. One that I knew Shawn wouldn't believe, and I made my excuses. "Bem was explaining the art of making sure everyone leaves the orgy satisfied. It's complicated and he was about to draw some diagrams."
Shawn shook his head at us. He felt defeated, but he wasn't upset about it. "Fine, I get the message. Just once, ONCE!" He held a stern index finger in the air. "And it has to be calm and quiet. I don't want Bem having a relapse and I don't want Joe to throw us out for having a loud romp while his son is trying to sleep in the other room."
I remembered that the room was soundproof and almost said something about it, but I realized that knowledge would make restraining Bem more difficult. I also didn't know exactly how sound proof the room might be. I decided to err on the side of caution and not say anything. I figured I wouldn't worry if we got a little noisy, but I'd still try to keep things quieter than normal.
Bem crossed the room and dropped to his knees in front of Shawn. He kissed Shawn's fingers one at a time. In between kisses he chanted, "thank you Doctor Shawn, thank you." Shawn pulled his hand away and Bem wrapped his arms around Shawn's legs. "You won't regret it." Bem whispered. "I will service you so quietly, you won't even know when you're finished."
Shawn tried to pry Bem away from him, but Bem's grasping hands were too fast. "Just stop it." Shawn demanded. "Stop it before I change my mind."
Bem jumped to his feet like he had been kneeling on a spring and saluted. "Yes, sir. Anything you say, sir. I'm here to serve you, sir."
Shawn craned his head around so he could make eye contact with me. "Church, help me." He pleaded.
I used my magic to lift Bem off his feet and stood him in the middle of the bed. "Strip." I commanded.
Bem followed directions with enthusiasm and his few clothes flew off his body like they were held on with Velcro. My eyes feasted on Bem's furry, sinewy leanness. He looked good. He was still thinner than I liked, but he didn't seem sick anymore. A lot of his color had come back. His extra leanness reminded me of the caution we were supposed to exercise. "We are not going to tire you out, so you have to let us do the work." I said.
"Anything you say. You're such a beast!" Bem covered his face like he was afraid of me, and I had to bite my tongue to stifle a laugh.
I felt Shawn's lust kindle and take fire. It didn't blaze, but it smoldered as we both enjoyed the sight of Bem and our anticipation of the pleasure to come. Shawn started the proceedings with a question. "This is about you, Bem. What will you have?"
Bem scrunched up his face like he was thinking furiously. He even pretended to pound his fists on his skull to make his brain work harder. He looked up and his face brightened like the light of inspiration had shone into his mind. "Sex," Bem announced, "I want sex...please."
Shawn shook his head while I chuckled at the mild joke. A big part of why I loved having Bem around was his teasing. He would go a long way to get a rise out of someone, and he loved to play around. I'd discovered that a great deal of what he did was calculated, but a lot of it was Bem being Bem. That was the part that I enjoyed the most.
Beside my relationship with Shawn, my friendship with Bem was the brightest thing in what I still thought of as my new life. Since my friend had been sick, and since I hadn't seen him in three months, and since this was his first romp with us in a while, I wanted it to be special for him. I wanted to give Bem whatever he wanted. I wanted to enjoy my friend and for him to enjoy me and for both of us to enjoy Shawn. I opened my mouth to reiterate Shawn's question when Shawn beat me to it.
"Yes, I assumed that. What...uh...acts do you want, either to perform on us, or to have performed on your person?"
Bem rattled off a wish list that would have taken the three of us at least a week to complete. A couple of the items seemed physically impossible or required props, toys, or rigging that we didn't have. Shawn let Bem finish and shook his head. "How about we save all that for another time? For now, just let Church and me love you. How does that sound?"
Bem's left hand crossed his body to knead his right shoulder and his right hand tried to slip into the pocket of the pants that he wasn't wearing. It was Bem's thoughtful posture. "You guys really do, don't you?" Bem asked and split a longing look between me and Shawn.
"What?" Shawn asked.
"You...you love me, don't you? I mean, more than friends...you guys, you'd...I mean, Church said that if I needed you...you'd come. You really would, wouldn't you? I mean...no matter what...right?" Bem seemed somehow small and vulnerable when he asked his stumbled and wandering question. The confident military professional, the lewd jokester, the horny adolescent, suddenly seemed a lost and lonely little boy.
My heart went out to him, Shawn and mine both. As if inspired by the same impulse, Shawn and I rushed to wrap ourselves around our friend. We pulled Bem into a hug and held him tight between us. I kissed the side of his face and Shawn kissed the other side. "I love you, Bem." I whispered to him.
"I love you to." Shawn told him from the other side.
I added, "and, if you needed us, nothing...NOTHING would keep us away from you."
"Nothing." Shawn agreed.
Bem sucked a breath that seemed to rattle in his throat and blew it out in a long sigh. "Thanks, guys. I love you to." He paused a long beat before adding, "would you fuck me now? Shawn first."
I leaned away from Bem so I could see both him and Shawn at the same time and objected. "Shawn first? What's that about? Why am I stuck with sloppy seconds?"
Bem grinned at me with his leering, teasing grin. "You love sloppy seconds, especially Shawn's."
I admitted that was true to the chuckling delight of both of my bedmates. When they finished laughing at my expense, I asked for some clarity from Bem. "Seriously though, I want this to be good for you, but I don't want to tax your system. So...I guess I could hold you down while Shawn fucks you, or you could tell us what you want. Thoughts?"
Bem looked at me for a long time before he spoke. When he opened his mouth, he seemed bashful about asking for what he wanted. "Big Guy...would you...would you lay down, and let me lay on top of you, and hold me while Shawn does his thing? I...I really want to be held, but I want sex to. Is that OK?"
I didn't grasp what Bem wanted from me. His words hadn't produced an image in my mind, but I agreed to do whatever he wanted. Shawn agreed along with me and asked Bem to show us what to do. Bem arranged me, laying face up on the bed. He climbed on top of me with his front to my front and laid down. He asked me to wrap him in my arms, which I did. Bem put his face in mine and kissed me with a deep, lingering tongue. "Hold me tight, Big Guy." Bem breathed over my face.
I tightened my arms around my friend. "Tighter," Bem demanded, "squeeze me like you want to pull me inside you."
I tightened my arms until Bem's breath grew labored, then loosened them just enough so he could breathe easily. Bem rested his lower jaw on my left shoulder and spoke into my ear. "This feels so good, Big Guy. You're so big and solid. You really make a guy feel safe. I like being here in your arms...in your big, manly arms against your big, manly body. I feel like...I feel like I'd like to...I wish I could." Bem shook his head as much as he could with his chin on my shoulder. "Never mind...it's too weird."
Bem sounded like he wanted to talk about whatever the weird thing was, and I wanted to let him. "No judgement here, Bem." I encouraged my friend. "You taught me that. What would you like to do? What's your wish?"
Bem turned his head and laid it on the front of my shoulder. Shawn came around next to me and laid on his side facing Bem and me. When he was looking at Bem's face, Bem told us what he wanted. "I kinda wish that I could give up myself and become a part of you guys. Like...like Shawn would climb on top of me like he was going to fuck me, and you, Big Guy, you would use those big arms to squeeze the three of us together until I...until I disappeared inside you both."
Bem stroked the side of my face with his hand and explained what he meant. "Like you would pull so hard that I would be inside, and I wouldn't have to be on my own anymore. I wouldn't have to be me. I could be part of you two and I could live inside where it's peaceful and quiet, and I wouldn't have to be out there anymore. I wouldn't have to be out there where it's loud."
I listened to Bem's wish and wondered what was bothering him. I wondered if it was part of his break-down or whatever it was that he'd been dealing with or if there was something deeper going on. I wanted to help him. I was willing to do almost anything to help him, but I didn't understand the problem. I tried to grasp what he'd said through the lens of what I'd witnessed with him in the days passed. "Tell me about the noise." I asked my friend. "Why do you want to be where it's quiet?"
Bem's voice drew down to a breathy whisper, like he didn't want the noise to hear him talking about it. "Noise...it's...people, they...when they hurt, or when they're angry...you know, they yell. It's...it's painful to hear the sounds...the sounds of pain or worse. People...everything, even animals, they...they cry out for pain, or hate, or suffering...they cry out in death. People cry out in death. I can't...the noise hurts me. I don't want to...anymore...don't you see? That's why...one of the reasons anyway."
Bem rubbed the hand that he'd used on my face over the flat of my right pec. He rubbed in a circle then rested his hand on my chest. "If I was inside where it's warm and quiet, then it would be OK. I imagine me inside you both, as part of you, part of this...this amazing thing you guys have. Then I wouldn't have to...I wouldn't have to do anything or deal with anything ever again because you would take care of everything. And...and your love would be my love. I think that would be perfect."
Shawn leaned into Bem and kissed him deeply in front of my face. When he finished, I kissed Shawn deeply, then I gave my mouth to Bem to complete the triangle. As I kissed my husband and my friend, my mind spun out the possible meanings of Bem's secret wish. I knew that what I had with Shawn was special, but I never thought of myself or my relationship as a refuge that anyone else would seek. I especially never thought of myself as a place to escape the world. Usually, it was me seeking escape in Shawn. The idea that Bem would want to give himself up to become part of us was sweet despite its strangeness, but I still didn't quite understand.
I asked Bem a general question that I hoped would help to give me a handle to grasp what Bem's situation was. I kept the question very general so as not to press him too hard for the details of his story. "Are you sad, Bem?"
"A little, yeah." He answered in a voice that rattled like he was trying not to cry.
Shawn asked. "How can we help?"
Bem quieted while he considered Shawn's question, then his face changed against my chest, and I knew he'd found his answer. I could almost feel the leer stretch his face. "Fuck my ass. That will help."
With that leering, silly statement, Bem ended the moment we'd been having. I felt like I'd gotten a peek at a side of my friend I didn't know existed, and as quickly as flipping a light switch, Bem had shut off that look and become his regular, teasing self. I felt a little sad that the moment was over, but it had seemed difficult for Bem to share as much as he had with us.
I supposed that I would have to appreciate the fact that Bem trusted Shawn and me enough to let us see that side of himself. I supposed that I'd have to hope that he'd trust us again in the future to let us see more. I tried to shift gears the way Bem had and embrace the new atmosphere that he was trying to project.
He gave us some instructions. "Shawn, you fuck my ass while Church holds me tight. Fuck me and make me feel it. When you finish, stay inside me and lay on my body and let the Big Guy hold us both." "What about me?" I asked.
Bem raised his face to look in mine. "Then we'll switch, and Shawn can hold me while you eat my ass and fuck me."
I didn't see a problem with any of that, except I wondered when Bem got off. I asked him. "After you fuck me, I'll let you eat me some more, then I'll let you suck a load out of me. If you do a good job, I'll let you have two." Bem promised.
I looked at Shawn who'd been following Bem's fantasy and sex instructions with a blend of curiosity and fascination. "Fine with me." Shawn said to agree with Bem's desires.
Shawn got up and moved along the bed to start on Bem's ass. Bem stopped him with a little yelp. "And after," Bem said in a voice that begged, "you'll put me between you, just the three of us with me in the middle, so we can sleep. Right?"
I leaned down and kissed the top of Bem's head. "Of course. All three of us together with you in the middle, safe and warm and protected."
"Thanks." Bem whispered. "You guys...I can't thank you...could never thank you enough."
Shawn shifted down toward the foot of the bed and knelt with his legs alternating between mine and Bem's. He opened Bem's furry ass and pressed his face into it to kiss Bem's hole. Bem shivered from the intimate contact. Shawn raised his head again. "You don't have to thank us for that stuff, Bem. I already told you, we do it because we love you. Now, relax and let us love you."
Shawn pressed his face into Bem's ass. Bem heaved a sigh that shook from the attention of Shawn's tongue. I loosened my grip on Bem and let my hands roam over his back. Bem's whole body, including his back was covered with an even coating of fine, dark-blond hair. It felt like silk to my palms. I ran my left hand down the channel of Bem's spine and used my middle finger to tease the top of Bem's crack.
My finger took Shawn's attention from the ass he was feasting on. He raised his eyes to mine. They smiled at me in spite of the fact that the mouth that he would normally smile with was busy. Our eye contact drove Shawn to increase his efforts on Bem's ass. He pointed his tongue and tongue-fucked Bem's furry hole while he maintained eye contact with me. The act made Shawn feel nasty and naughty. Something that Shawn and I shared was intense mutual arousal at watching and being watched by the other when we had sex with Bem.
Bem moaned in my ear and squirmed against my body from Shawn's attention. I felt his cock harden against my belly. I knew that he'd be leaking soon. When Bem was very aroused, his cock leaked like a faucet. I loved that about him. I loved the slick, salty juice that flowed from him in stringy drips. I loved the feeling of having it smeared between us and I loved that it would be something for Shawn and Bem to lick off me later.
Shawn took his face from Bem's ass to tease him by blowing across his hole. That particular act, that of pausing a rim job to blow on the hole, was something Bem had taught us. The breath evaporates moisture from the bottom's ass, creating the sensation of abrupt cooling. It was intense for the recipient and something that usually elicited shivering groans of pleasure.
Bem reacted the way I expected. His body trembled against mine as Shawn blew on his hole more than once. He groaned in appreciation. Shawn grinned at me. He took pleasure in giving Bem pleasure and in me watching him do it. Shawn gasped a breath and leaned into Bem to keep going with the rim job when a quick cry from Bem stopped him. "Big Guy," Bem said to my ear, "please...please just hold me. Don't do anything else, just hold me."
I wanted to ask him why, but I didn't. I put my arms back where they had been and crushed Bem against me. "OK?" I asked him when I thought I had the tension right.
"Thanks...thank you...like a lot." Bem whispered to me. "Tell Shawn to go ahead now."
I nodded to Shawn who dove into Bem's ass with new enthusiasm. I held Bem tightly and enjoyed his heat and the masculine scent of his body while Shawn ate him, then fucked him. When he was finished, we switched. Shawn and I gave Bem what he wanted. We made love to him in the exact manner that he proscribed. The only liberty I took was near the end of the session, after I'd sucked the first load out of Bem.
My mouth was full to bursting with rich, thick cum. I'd had to let some slide down my throat because there was so much of it, much more than I was used to from Bem. The volume of it reminded me that the load was the product of several days of abstinence. I was tempted to gulp it down, but that much of Bem's creamy and slightly bitter cum seemed to demand I do something more creative with it. I looked up at Bem's hairy body, slick with the sweat of sex, and was inspired.
I moved up the bed, straddling Bem and Shawn who was underneath him. Shawn held Bem tightly like I had done, except Bem had flipped to be face-up. I'd already fucked him and rimmed my load from his hole when I turned him over to suck him off. I got Shawn to unfold his arms from over Bem's chest and to relocate his hands to Bem's shoulders. Bem protested until I made stern eye contact with him. He quieted and watched to see what I was going to do. I centered my face over Bem's sweaty, hairy chest and pursed my lips. Bem's load dribbled from my mouth and ran down his body.
Bem didn't understand and said as much. "Big Guy, I thought..."
I held my right index finger up to stop his talking, then used the palm of that same hand to smear the cum across the whole of Bem's torso. I finished by wiping the cummy hand over Bem's lips and close beard. The look on his face showed that he still didn't understand what I was doing. I demonstrated by moving down Bem's body, to the bottom of his flat stomach, and using my tongue to lap the cum and salty sex-sweat from Bem's torso.
Bem seemed to approve of my idea. He even said so. "Ooooooohhhhh fffuuuuuuuuuuck aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh..." he moaned as I licked and slurped and tongue-fucked his belly button.
I made short work of Bem's body and finished by licking his face like an affectionate dog. I plunged my tongue into his mouth, kissed him deeply, then slid right back down his body to suck another load from his still-hard cock. Bem objected as I slurped his cock into my throat. "No! Big Guy...too...much."
He even tried to push me away until Shawn pinned his arms at his sides and held him tightly like he had before. I knew that if Bem tried to push me away, I'd likely overdone things. I didn't want to stop, but I also didn't want to exhaust Bem too badly. I decided to `pull his trigger' to get him off quickly. I used my thumb on his perinium and two fingers in his ass to massage his prostate so he'd shoot his second load without too much effort.
Bem filled my mouth a second time. I released his softening cock from my mouth and moved up along his body again. This time my goal was different. I spread myself over Bem to sandwich his gasping, heaving body between me and Shawn and so I could put my face over Shawn's. Shawn knew what I planned to do because it was something I did most times the three of us were together. Shawn opened his mouth to receive his treat. I let Bem's thinner, second load run from my mouth into Shawn's, then followed it in with my tongue. We kissed and let our tongues play with the load until Shawn finally swallowed it down.
I rocked back on my legs to sit on my heels. I opened my mouth to ask Bem if what we'd done had met with his approval, but I never spoke my teasing question. Bem was fast asleep. I guessed I really had over done things and worn him out beyond exhaustion. I felt bad for pushing things too far. I hoped I hadn't driven him to a relapse. Shawn didn't seem worried, so I took some solace from that.
I wrapped Bem in my telekinesis and lifted him from Shawn's body. I moved him to the center of the bed and laid him gently on his side. I left my magic around him so he wouldn't feel abandoned and waved for Shawn to follow me to the bathroom.
I built a box of magic around the whole inside of the bathroom to block any sound from waking Bem. I left a small hole for my magic to get through so I could keep Bem `swaddled' in my power. I'd planned to tell Shawn that I needed my ass fucked badly and that the session with Bem, though fun, hadn't done anything to sate my appetite. Shawn preempted what I planned to say by showing me that he felt the same way. He leapt onto the sink and positioned himself on his knees with his ass pointed at me.
He slapped his right ass cheek the used both hands to spread himself open. "Eat me like you're starving and fuck my ass like you're mad at it!" Shawn demanded.
I slid a soft mat of my magic between Shawn's delicate knees and the hard composite of the sink. When I was certain he was comfortable, I did as he asked.
About an hour and two rounds of ass eating and flip fucking later, Shawn and I were in the oversized bathtub with the water up to our shoulders. The only light in the room was the tiny, plug-in nightlight over the sink. I laid against the tub and Shawn laid against me. My hands were flat on Shawn's chest and Shawn's hands were flat against mine. He took my right hand in both of his and played with it, kneading it between his hands and tracing the scars with his soft fingers. "I love your hands." He said and kissed the back of my meaty paw.
Shawn returned my hand to his chest and laced his fingers in mine. "What was that about?" He asked me.
I knew that Shawn was asking about Bem, but I decided to tease him a little anyway. "You told me to fuck your ass like I was mad at it. I just did what you asked me."
Shawn sighed at my teasing and chuckled gently. "Silly ass." He breathed to the darkened room. "You know I meant Bem and his wish. What's going on with him? And what was with that sex that he wanted? I like to be held, but usually after sex, not during. I've never had sex like that."
"I don't know." I replied helplessly. "That stuff he said...about giving himself up to be part of us, that was weird. I mean...I kind of get it, but I've never heard anyone talk about it like that."
"What do you get?" Shawn asked.
If I hadn't been holding Shawn, I would have rubbed my neck to help me answer his question. Since I couldn't do that, I craned my head off the tub so I could kiss Shawn's right shoulder. I settled my head back and tried to explain. "He's overwhelmed by his life. I don't really understand all that stuff about the noise and people in pain and that, but it's obvious that Bem needs a place to hide. He thinks we have this super special relationship, and..."
Shawn's guard went up as I mentioned us. "Don't we?" He blurted.
"Don't we what?" I asked. His outburst had taken me by surprise and I didn't know what we were talking about.
Shawn clarified. "Don't we have a super-special relationship?"
"Of course, we do." I rushed to make sure I didn't hurt Shawn's feelings by inadvertently minimizing our love. "I don't mean to take anything away from what we have. I'm just saying, from Bem's perspective, he seems to think what we have is...I don't know." I took a breath to reset what I was trying to say and went at it from a fresh angle.
"I love you. You know I love you. I know you love me. What we have it amazing and special and wonderful and life changing. Anyone who was alone would look at what we have and want to have it. Most people would look at us and they would think, `I want that, I need to find someone to have that with.' Bem...he seems to look at what we have like it's something he could never have. Why?"
"Why?" Shawn parroted.
"I think it's that `why,' whatever that thing is, I think that's what's eating him up." I reasoned.
"What could that be?" Shawn asked the obvious question.
"No idea. Whatever it is, I feel like we have something to do with it. Whatever happened to him, it started happening after we saw him three months ago. I've been trying to figure it out, but I don't know what made that visit different from all the other visits we've had with him. It was a little longer than most of the others, but other than that." I shrugged. "I mean, we saw a show, spent the week with him, and romped every night. That's pretty much what we do every time."
Shawn shook his head against my chest and yawned. "I don't know, but I think it's time for bed. We'll have to think about it some more tomorrow."
I agreed with Shawn. We had a little more conversation while we rinsed off from the bath and dried each other. The gist of it was that we wouldn't ask Bem outright unless something changed that required us to ask. We would let him come to us or keep his secret as he saw fit. In the meantime, as long as he kept getting better, that would be enough for us.
When we were dry and ready for bed, Shawn and I arranged ourselves around Bem in the `row of spoons' positions that we'd been sleeping in since the night he showed up on our doorstep. I pressed against Bem's back, with Shawn at his front, and composed myself to sleep. Shawn drifted off first. I felt his consciousness shut down for the night. I followed him to dreamland soon after.