Hey.. sorry that it took so long, but I'm in university and papers must come first... Here it is enjoy...
Raven.
Friends and Lovers
Five
Raven
Disclaimers: If you don't already know this we have a problem.... IF you are under eighteen leave now.. and if not cool.. But if you can't handle male male sex relationships run....
Notes: The truth of Nicks feeling come out...
As Brian and Nick walked to their rooms, after leaving AJ and Howie, Nick knew he couldn't let it go any longer.
"Bri, can we talk?"
"Sure, let's hit my room." Brian replied opening the door closest to them, they were given singles all except Howie and AJ, but the management company booked five rooms anyway, they figured that the boys needed their personal space, especially as they were getting older, and were not so inclined to hide their significant others anymore. Kevin told them that he wasn't going to hide Raven that he loved her and that meant that she deserved respect from him and the fans, as they would just have to accept that he was taken.
"So" Brian turned to face him,
"I have to tell you something."
'What?"
"Brian I'm gay."
"That's all. I thought that you were going to tell me that you were leaving the group."
"You're not freaked?"
"NO. If anything AJ and Howie have showed me that the bible is not always right and loving a member of the same sex is not wrong."
"Brian that is not all that I want to tell you."
"So, what else do you want to tell me?"
"I'm in love."
"Who?"
"You." Nick whispered, while looking right into his eyes. Waiting for the look of complete revulsion, to come across his face. Instead one of shock filtered through his eyes.
"Me?"
"Yeah."
"Why?"
"You.. well you're you. You befriended me and took me under your wing. You made me your friend when you were closer in age to Howie and AJ than me."
"Nick....I..."
"You're grossed out and you want me to leave." Nick finished for him, heading to the door, at least he told him and he would never regret that.
"No, I'm flattered. But I'm not gay."
"I know, I wanted to tell you before I told the rest of the guys, and I guess that I just hoped, in here," he pointed to his heart "that you might feel the same."
"I understand."
"Thanks frick I'll be going now."
"No, stay and watch movies with me, or even play a few games of Nintendo."
"Movies, I left the game in Howie and AJ's room, I'm not going to knock."
"Me either. Movies?"
"Yeah, what though?"
"Lets just see what's on."
"Cool, I'll go get changed and me you in here." Nick said turning to the door, Brian nodded. He needed some alone time to deal with this anyway. Nick walked quickly to his room, he didn't want to risk anyone seeing him cry. Holding in the tears was going to be hard enough, without drawing attention of the rest of the guys, and he had never been a quite crier. He couldn't keep the sobs in.
"Nick?" Kevin opened his door; the youngest member of the group in tears had his fatherly instincts in gear.
"I'm fine Kevin." Nick tried to move past him.
"No you're not. Tell me."
"I'm sorry, I can't talk about it." Nick said.
"Nick you told him."
"Told who what?"
"Brian that you are gay."
"How did you know?"
"Nick you haven't dated any girls and even Tera didn't raise your interest."
"Tera?"
"Oh. Come on like you didn't notice that she was a hottie."
"Where is Raven's number?"
"What?"
"Well somebody should tell her that her guy thinks that her best friend is a hottie."
"She knows. She asked." Kevin explained as he noticed the look on Nick's face.
"Kev. I've got to go. Meeting Brian to watch movies."
"So things are good between you?"
"I guess. We'll talk latter about it. I need to give him time to adjust."
"Cool."
"Go call her. You know that you want to." Nick pushed him into his room so that he could rush to get back to his fantasy.
Nick rushed to get ready, and then hurried back to Brian's room, when he arrived Brian was waiting for him, wearing a pair of basketball shorts and a tank top. "So what are we watching" Nick asked, smiling at him, "Let's see what's on." Brian moved over on the couch, so that he could sit down. "Thanks" Nick flopped down on the couch beside him, Brian quickly flipped between channels. Nick was getting frustrated he went to grab the remote.
Brian moved to get out of his reach, while he continued to surf the channels. "Hey, my room, my remote" Brian chided.
"Okay so pick something."
"Nothing looks good."
"So stop and watch, maybe something will look good then." Nick countered, flopping back on the couch closing his eyes. "Tell me when you've picked."
"Okay, I've picked something." Brian said, watching Nick.
"What?" he replied opening his eyes, to a blank screen. "There's nothing on."
"I know." Brian replied, lying down on the opposite side of him. His hand on his chest. "Nick can we talk?"
"Sure."
"On the floor." Nick looked at him, and shrugged, Brian was always more comfortable on the floor when he wanted to talk, they had all gotten used to it.
"So what's up?" Nick asked as they settled on the floor.
"I don't know how to feel, but I want us to be friends." Brian said, attentively reaching his hand out towards Nicks.
"Kay," Nick agreed his eyes trained on Brian's hand, watching as Brian reached further towards him, grasping his hand twining his fingers through his. If you asked Brian why he did he couldn't have told you, he just needed to feel his hand. They laid there not talking just being together, falling asleep.
Through the night he gravitated towards Nick, to his warmth. Waking latter that morning with his head pillowed on his friends chest, listening to his heart. His arm around him, holding the young blond close to him. It felt right, causing Brian to snuggle closer to Nick as to keep warm.
"Blanket on the bed." Nick mumbled
"Moving bad." Brian replied.
"Stay here." Nick smiled at him half asleep, as he pushed himself up, quietly going to grab a blanket for his dream lover. Grabbing a pillow at the last minute.
"Here." he placed the blanket around him, with the pillow under his head, he moved to leave.
"Stay." Brian murmured, pulling on Nick's basketball shorts, almost pulling them off.
"Okay" Nick agreed, as he laid down beside him, as soon as he was settled, Brian moved closer to him, giving him the pillow as he cuddled to his chest.
"Nick this feels good." Brian murmured.
"Yeah it does." Nick agreed hoping that he would fall asleep soon; having Brian close to him was not doing anything for him, or his body. He had to pull away slightly so that Brian wouldn't notice.
"Nick?"
"Bri, this is not a good idea."
"Why?"
"You're doing things to me."
"Really?" Brian raised his head, his eyes smiling at him in the dim light
"Yeah."
"I'm sorry."
"Bri it's okay, unless it bothers you."
"I'm not sure how I feel. I don't know if it bothers me."
"You're not sure?"
"Nick waking in your arms felt right. Falling asleep in them was even better."
"Brian.."
"I know. I need to think."
"Yeah you do, I should leave."
'Okay" Brian replied, he watched as Nick stood and headed out the door, he had to stop himself from looking back, he knew that Brian needed time, he should have never came back last night.
Walking to his room, he heard Kevin moving around behind his door, and knocked.
"It's open, come in." Kevin called.
"Kevin can we talk?" Nick asked.
"Sure close the door, and come and sit down." Kevin motioned him into the room.
"Kevin can I tell you something?"
"Sure Nick, I already know that you are gay so what else can you tell me?"
"I'm in love."
"With?"
"Brian."
"Did you tell him?"
"Yeah, he was okay with me being gay and all, but I don't think that I should have told him."
"That you are gay?"
"No that I love him."
"How'd he take it?"
"Okay I guess. He fell asleep with me, and when we woke up he was cuddled to me." Nick looked at the ground.
"So?"
"Kevin, I don't think that he loves me. I know that he doesn't love me, and I don't think that he can handle knowing."
"Give him some credit Nick. He's grown up, so have you," Kevin walked over to the young blond, god he was so tall now, taller than him almost. He pulled Nick into his arms and just held him.
"I messed up." Nick cried.
"Shh, you and Bri will be fine."
"Kev, why are you up?" Nick asked changing the subject.
"I couldn't sleep."
"Why?"
"Raven wasn't home last night and she has exams, so she should have been."
"So call her now."
"I tried, she still isn't home."
"Or she's sleeping with the ringer off."
"Her cell isn't on."
"Kevin she's fine." Nick tried to soothe him. "I hope so." Kevin replied, sitting on the bed. "Kev, are you going to be okay, I need more sleep." Nick smiled at him.
"Yeah, go sleep, I'll wake you for breakfast in a few hours." Kevin pushed him out the door. Nick went, he wanted to call Tera anyway, if something was wrong with Raven, she would know.
Nick picked up the phone in his room, and dialed the now familiar number, he had gotten close to Tera when they met, that night two years ago. She was a big sister to him, she was so off the wall that he thought back then before they knew about AJ and Howie that she would be perfect for AJ, but then he realized that she was probably better for Kevin. But she loved her friend too much to move on him, even though she wanted to.
"Hello." Her quite voice said, as she picked up the phone half asleep.
"Tera?"
"Nick?"
"Yeah, sorry I woke you."
"It's okay, what is it?"
"It's Kevin."
"What about him?"
"Has Raven talked to you?"
"Not since last week, why?"
"She isn't answering her phone and he is worried about her."
"I'll call her and let you know. So how are you?"
"Okay." Nick sighed.
"Nicholas, start talking."
"I told Kevin and Brian that I'm gay."
"And?"
"They took it well, but I also told Brian the other thing."
"Oh Nicky, are you okay?"
"I will be. When he deals with it."
"If you need me, I'll be there."
"I know, Tera I need to sleep, can I let you go?"
"Yeah, you'd better email me." Tera said.
"I will."
"Nicky I love you."
"I know and if I was older you'd want me in a heart beat."
"Maybe if you weren't gay." Tera laughed. Nick smiled, as they hung up. He climbed into his bed, and curled up, letting sleep take over his body. ****************
Breakfast came faster than anyone wanted. The phone woke AJ first as it rang in their room, he had to climb over his sleeping husband to reach it.
"Yeah?"
"Food I hour in my room." Kevin said.
"We'll be there." AJ hung up the phone. He leaned down to kiss his husband awake. "I'm up," Howie mumbled rolling over to hide in the pillows.
"Really, I don't see it." AJ chuckled as his husband flipped over to look at him with shock. "What, it's not." AJ smiled at him.
"So what are you going to do about that?" Howie raised an eyebrow.
"Nothing, we have to be ready for breakfast in an hour."
"So we'll be quick." Howie reached out to rub his palm across his husband.
"We have meetings."
"So we can't be late." Howie pouted.
"If we don't take long, we can play first." AJ conceded.
"Yeah I get to play with my favorite toy." Howie smiled at him, pulling him down so that he was resting on him. Howie arched under him, bringing his naked skin into contact with his husbands, their hardening cocks brushing against each other; Howie pulled AJ's head down, capturing him in a deep kiss.
"Good morning," AJ chuckled as he pulled away, looking deep into Howie's brown eyes. Howie reached up for another kiss, opening his lips to let him inside, wrapping his tongue around his.
"Some one wants attention." AJ smiled reaching between them to grab Howie in his hand. "I love you." Howie whispered, rubbing his back.
"Howie will you make love to me again." AJ asked, lying down beside him, Howie turned to look at him.
"Are you sure? You aren't to sore?"
"Howie I love you, having you inside me last night was so nice. I want to feel that again." AJ replied looking deeply into his eyes. "Okay, if you hurt even a little you tell me to stop." Howie replied pulling him back on top of him "you control this." Howie smiled at him, AJ leaned down to capture his lips, moving gently down his neck, nipping at his collarbone, moving to his nipples, he kissed and sucked, causing his husband to arch under him. Howie needed to feel his skin under his lips, moving he sat up, and captured one of AJ's nipples in his teeth, flicking the nipple with his tongue before letting it go. Knowing that he was trying to keep his moans back, Howie kissed his collarbone, murmuring "It's okay, be loud we have the entire floor."
"The guys." AJ replied, shivering as Howie moved his body down so that his mouth was facing his tattoo, he began to trace the 69 there. "They've heard it before." He replied, inching ever further down on the bed, tracing a path with his tongue, until he found AJ's weeping hardness, sucking just the head of it into his mouth.
"Oh God." AJ screamed, as Howie pulled him down sharply, so that he could deep throat him.
"Howie I need you in me now." AJ cried reaching for the nightstand, Howie handed him the lube, sitting up so that AJ could have better access to his hard throbbing cock. AJ grabbed the lube putting some on the palm of his hand, warming it in his hands before he wrapped his hands around Howie, so that he could enter him better. Howie whipped a small dab off his hand, and moved to place his finger at AJ's hole. "Alex?" Howie asked before he went any further. "It's okay, I know that you wouldn't ever hurt me." AJ smiled at him, moving down so that his hole was right over Howie's finger, the tip just inside him, feeling even that small part of his husband was right. AJ moved his hand away, and slowly sat down over, him taking him into himself.
"I love you Alexander James McLean."
"And I you Howard Dwayne McLean." AJ replied as Howie's hardness entered him, filling him completely, making him complete.
"Ohhhhh."
"Alex?"
"I'm okay." AJ smiled at him, moving up and quickly sinking down he wanted this hard and fast. Howie's abs brushed against AJ's hard cock as he was sitting facing him, his cock was trapped between their bodies, as AJ moved on him, with him, the friction was unbearable, AJ shot load after load, on to their cheats. The intense climax, was more than Howie could bear as AJ closed around him, the pressure on his erection caused him to shoot his cum inside him.
"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." They moaned together, coming down off the intense feelings.
The commotion woke Brian from his half sleep, he had fallen back to sleep after Kevin called to tell him about the meeting, he looked at his watch he had only ten minutes to shower and get ready. He gathered the blankets, and pillow threw them on the bed, before heading out to Kevin's room. The door was open, he was the last to get there, even Howie and AJ had beaten him, he quickly grabbed a plate and sat beside Nick. His dreams were so confused after the blond had left that morning.
"Guy's I have something that I need to say." Nick said as Brian sat down.
"So what is it?" Howie asked feeding AJ a piece of toast.
"I'm gay."
"Since?"
"Since forever, how long have you been gay AJ?"
"Okay it was a stupid question."
"You guys are okay with it?"
"We'd be hypocritical if we weren't"
"I know, but three of the five guys look at guys,"
"So all the more for Bri." AJ laughed.
Through the whole thing Brian watched him, he was a beautiful man, but what did that mean, what did his dream mean. Why was he kissing him, and why did he like it? The questions rattled around his head. He knew that being gay was not a bad thing, but being gay and a southern Baptist was. He knew that Kevin could accept him. Wait, why did he think that he wasn't gay.
"Hey Brian you home?" AJ asked breaking him out of his trance.
"What?" He jumped.
'You home?"
"Not really."
"Where were you?" Howie asked, looking at Nick, he had noticed that Brian was looking at him,
"On the concert." Brian replied looking him in the eye.
'Sure" Howie smiled at the younger man.
'Okay guys rehearsal. Sound check then a two hour break to rest and shower." Kevin said breaking down the day for them.
'When do we leave?"
"Three hours AJ."
"Cool I need to change my hair."
"No you don't " Howie shot back,
"What?" AJ replied looking at him,
"I like it as it is."
"I need a change. Nothing permanent" AJ said giving him a compromise.
"Okay so if I hate then it goes."
"We'll see."
"What?"
"Howie, please, just wait to see what I do." AJ pouted,
"Okay, fine." He agreed, laughing as AJ smiled at him, sticking out his tongue.
"Hey guy's meet downstairs in three hours." Kevin said, shooing them all out the door. He wanted privacy when he called her, that's even if she was home.
Nick went to Bri's door, and knocked. "It's open, come on in." Brian called from the bathroom; he just finished brushing his teeth.
"Hey man." Nick called to let him know who was there.
'Hey Frack."
"What's up?" Brian asked.
"Other than me," Nick muttered under his breath, as Brian walked back into the room in a towel.
"What Nick I didn't hear you."
"Nothing."
"Oh, kay, so what do you want to do?"
"Nintendo?"
"Yeah, Oh wait it is still in ..."
"AJ and Howie's room. "
"I'll get it." Nick needed to get out of the room, and collect himself. He quickly walked over to AJ and Howie's room, and knocked.
"Hey Nick, it waiting for you." Howie let him by.
"Thanks." Nick grabbed it so that Howie could sleep.
Quickly he walked over to Brian's open door, and went to hook up the station.
"Frack, what do you want to play?"
"Pick something, I'll be right there, I need to finish shaving."
"Kay, hurry up, I wanna kick your but." Nick called back.
"Just grab Mario Cart."
"I already did."
"Who are you?"
"Yoshi who else?"
"Give me."
"Mario I know."
"Okay. Okay, just give me the controller."
"Okay let's play." he took the controller as Nick handed it to him, leaning over without thinking and kissing him on the cheek.
"Whoa!"
'Sorry I shouldn't have."
"No. Bri don't apologize, especially if you meant it."
"I'm not sure that I did, I just wanted to."
"Brian I don't mind, it was kinda nice." Nick replied leaning over to kiss him on the cheek in return.
"Can we take this slow?"
"What slow?"
"This"
"Brian what is this?"
"I'm not sure."
"Brian you really need to think, I don't want to get hurt."
"I won't hurt you." Brian kissed him, really kissed him tongue and all.
"Frick if this is an experiment tell me. If it's a joke tell me. Please be serious with me, these are my feelings."
"Nick, this isn't an experiment, I promise that. I just kinda like the idea of you loving me, but I don't know if I can return them."
"I understand. I shouldn't have told you."
"I've been thinking about it all since you told me." Brian whispered.
"And?"
"I'm attracted to you, but I can't pursue that."
"Okay so we forget I said anything, and try to be Frick and Frack again."
"No I want to talk to you."
"I don't. It hurts to much I love you and you just told me that you were attracted to me, but you couldn't act on it."
"Nick I'm confused, I'm sorry."
"I know." Nick climbed to his feet, and left the room, he didn't want Brian to see him cry. He would feel guilty, and he didn't want that.
"Nick?"
"Brian I need space. I'll see you at rehearsal." Brian nodded.
Sorry I couldn't resist.. I need to sleep anyway...
Raven...
Comment welcome... purpleraven81@hotmail.com