fred had changed positions during sleep. He usually did: there was something about John's smell that made him feel even more secure, and John never seemed to mind when fred switched positions, and curled up into John's chest, where he could smell John's body. John always held him close, which he loved too. Now, as fred woke up, he could feel John running his fingers through his thick hair. John was already awake. He almost always woke up first. fred saw the far away look. John knew his boy was awake, but he was thinking of something. fred knew the look: it was a memory: one that wasn't all together good. "A penny for your thoughts, Sir?" fred smiled up, and felt John pull him in, even closer. fred's stiff dick lay on John's thigh, and John felt that too. He smiled. He planned to give fred release today but... his own cock was hard. John looked into fred's eyes, and smiled. "I was just thinking about the worst day and the best day of my life, fred." He leaned over and kissed fred's forehead. "You're in both of them." "Mmmmm. I'm happy to be in the best one, Sir. But the worst one? What did I do?" "Ha ha. Something you had to do. That day... your going away party at the law firm." "You mean the day I resigned, Sir?" "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO. THAT I handled very well. But the party. I took two sick days after that." "HUH? I didn't know that. Cheryl didn't tell me." (Cheryl and fred had kept in touch while he was living in upstate NY. They were still very close). John sighed deeply. "I told her not to tell you. I knew you'd be talking. I knew you'd ask and.... I knew I'd break down." "I had no idea, Sir." "Ah, there's a lot of things you have no idea about freddy. And that's ok." He reached down and stroked fred's cock. fred moaned. "You wanna know the best one?" "nnnnnnnnnnnnng. Yes sir. Yes Daddy." "That day you came running after me on the street. When you were in town for the conference." fred smiled. "Right before I moved back. The day I invited you to dinner." John laughed and squeezed harder. "You mean the day you SEDUCED me you little fucker." Now fred laughed. "Yeah, I guess I did that too." "Well, now you're going to atone for your actions. I know you need to bust a nut. But so do I and... " "Yes sir. I understand." John put his hands behind his head and smiled. "So what're you waiting for, fred? Get to work." "YES SIR!" fred pushed off the blankets and moved down. He began licking John's cock, sliding his tongue up and down as John began to moan.....
"The worst day of my life." That's how John regarded that day. fred had worked for him for just about 5 years. Their relationship had deepened: business trips, lunches, dinners, galas. fred's first tuxedo when he came to John for help with the cufflinks, looking like a scared puppy. Kelly had bought fred that tuxedo. Kelly had been fred's girlfriend since they met in grade school. Then high school, then law school, they were the "IT" couple of their small town and then the law school. Kelly had been tops in their class, and edited the law review. Smart, organized, in charge. "Kelly reminds me of you, John" fred had joked once, on a Monday after the three of them had gone to dinner. "I'm kinda scare of her, but I also wanna be with her." "Awwwwwwwwwww, fred. That's sweet. Does she know you feel that way?" "About her? Or you?" fred teased and flirted now. Cheryl had told him that it was ok: John really liked it and he was just like his cat Spacey: "no bite behind the bark. He'll just laugh." John laughed at fred's question. "I'm sure she knows how you feel about her." John also knew how fred felt about HIM: Kelly had told him that "It's John said this, John did that. GOD I feel like he has another girlfriend." "You have nothing to worry about Kelly," John had told her. "Oh, I'm not worried about you doing something. I'm worried about his crushes." She paused. "John, he has a big, BIG man crush on you." THAT one had taken John by surprise. "Well, do you want me to do something about it?" "OH NO PLEASE DON'T. " She got serious. "You know he grew up without a father, don't you?" "I didn't. He didn't share that and, well, I'm not supposed to ask." "No father, no brothers. You're the first male figure he's ever looked up to. You're the first one who's been nice to him." "Kelly, you better stop. You're gonna make me cry." "Ha ha. NAH. That's not gonna happen. Cheryl told me no one has ever seen you shed a tear." That much was true. It didn't mean that John didn't cry. He was just very private about it. Pauline had seen it. Once. And she never told anyone about it.
So, given the long relationship the two of them had, John wasn't caught completely by surprise when fred knocked on his office door one day. "Hey, John. Can I talk with you for a few?" "Sure, You know the hot seat, Fred." Before he sat down, Fred closed John's office door. He saw the photo of Spacey next to John's computer, and the photo of, as John called him "the infamous Steve," the man he was dating. "Oh my. This must be serious. Is everything ok, Fred?" "Yes and no. John, I'm tendering my resignation." "GOD. That's not ok. What happened? Did someone offer you more money? Are you unhappy here? Why? " "No no no. None of that. " He paused. "Kelly and I want to start a family and... well, NYC just doesn't seem to be the place. So, we looked around and, thanks to our bosses, we seem to be very much in demand back home. We both have offers "At different firms, I hope?" Fred shook his head. "Yup. I remember your advice to never work where your other half works. Kelly got the same advice. Believe it or not, we found two firms that want us, and... well, two months? Is that ok Sir?" John needed a minute to get his composure. He took a sip from a water bottle at his side, wished he could reach into his desk for the gin, and smiled. "NY is hard for families. VERY hard. You'll need a support network and your family is there. " He paused "No question I'm not happy about it, Fred but... it makes sense. And I understand" He stood up. He didn't have to worry about the hard on he always had when he was alone with Fred, showing, because the news had killed it. "You know we're gonna send you off real big. Cheryl and I. Don't say no." Fred laughed. "I won't. I've been to some of the other parties you gave." Then he lowered his voice. "Just don't make it as big as Cheryl's partnership party. She'll never speak to you again if you do." John began to laugh. "You're gonna make a great lawyer Fred. You already are. And you're gonna make a great father. Now, let's get back to work and pretend you don't hear anything about Cheryl and I planning the party." Fred smiled broadly. "Thank you John. I can't begin to tell you how grateful I am for all you've done." "Then do it for someone else. Someday."
It WAS a big party. It was an ENORMOUS one. EVERYONE adored Fred, not just his department, and the big conference room for the fete was filled: junior lawyers, senior lawyers, they all showed up. When the chant of "SPEECH SPEECH SPEECH" went up Kelly, who was sitting next to Fred, laughed and told him he had to. So Fred stood, and took a sip of wine. He thanked the firm, he thanked his colleagues and at the end he looked at John. "John told me he'd be difficult to work with. He is. He also told me I'd be a better lawyer thanks to him. I am. I owe him everything. John, do you mind if I hug you?" John broke his rule. The hug was firm and long, and he had to be careful that he didn't brush up against Fred and let him know what he was feeling... He wanted to kiss Fred and wondered why there would be a problem if he did. When Cheryl made partner, no one minded but he knew.... OH, he knew. He could have the picture of steve on his desk: steve, the man who gave the best blow jobs he had ever gotten, loved being tied up and gagged more than anyone he had ever dated, but he couldn't bring steve to parties. That was ok. He had a feeling he and steve would be breaking up soon, but now he was drifting. It wasn't fair. The party went on and, when John had a chance, he snuck out and went back to his office. He began to cry softly, but he composed himself when he saw Kelly at the door. "KELLY? My... is.... " "Everything's fine John but I was worried. I looked up and you were gone. Are you ok?" John laughed a little. "I don't do goodbyes well. And in my experience you kids feel inhibited when dinosaurs like me are around." Kelly began to laugh. "Well, no one feels inhibited with you John, especially not Fred." She paused. "We're both gonna miss you. Probably every day." "Until you have a screaming baby in the house." "Ha ha. You haven't taught Fred how to change a diaper, have you?" "I'd have to learn first, Kelly." "Well, you taught him everything else. He hugged you, can I?" "Oh, Kelly! That would be the best thing that happened to me today."
Kelly he could kiss. "You two go off and make a GREAT life for yourself. Take care of that boy." About ten minutes later, Fred was at his office. John had a feeling Kelly had sent him but.. he was wrong. He closed the door like he did when he tendered his resignation. "I'm not gonna sit John, and I'd appreciate it if you got up because.... if I don't hug you right now, I'm gonna start bawling." "Well, that makes two of us." They both cried anyway and then, John broke another one of his rules. "We had something more than a work friendship Fred. I can't explain it." "Neither can I John, but..." Their lips met. Just for a second. "GET OUTTA HERE YOU PERV!" John laughed. "Seriously. that was everything Fred. And I'll try to come by before it breaks up." "We're going down the street to the Irish pub. Come join us when you're ready." "Sure. A few hours." "Thanks again for everything." Then he was gone. "Why don't you go join them, Pauline?" "Cause I got something more important to do, John. I gotta make sure you hold it together because you and I are gonna be here when he's gone, and you are NOT taking this well." "I know. I know. " He shook his head. "I never fell in love with a straight guy before." Pauline laughed and looked down at her keyboard. "And you still haven't."
John didn't go to the Irish pub that night. He jerked off thinking about Fred. He cuddled with Spacey. And he broke up with steve: it was coming. For all the things steve loved, that John loved, he did NOT want to get fucked in the ass, and it was driving John crazy. He spent the next three days crying, jerking off, cuddling the cat, and drinking the gin in his apartment. Finally, when Pauline called him and said he had had enough time feeling sorry for himself and he should get his gay ass to work, he did. The first thing he did when he got back, was toss the photo of steve. The only photo on his desk was Spacey and, when Spacey passed on and he got Angus - the amazing Maine coon cat kitten, his picture went on his desk. People would ask him why his desk was so spare: Cheryl's office was CRAMMED with photos of everyone she had ever worked with in the department. "I'm not good at commitment" was what John would say. He didn't even have a photo of Fred. Cheryl offered him some, but he declined. He told himself: "it'll be easier to put it behind me."
He was walking back from a meeting with a client, heading toward the subway, when he heard a voice that sounded familiar. "JOHN! JOHN!!!! WAIT UP!!!!" When John turned around he thought "OH SHIT. I'm in trouble. " It was Fred. The young man, out of breath and sweating, but smiling, grabbed him in a hug. "FUCK I could recognize you a mile away. What luck!" "I feel the same way too, kid. GEEZ. You here for a conference or something?" "Well, no. Fact is, John.. Quick version. Kelly and I are no more. We're friends but... it wasn't gonna work. So I went looking for work in NYC again and.... I STARTED LAST WEEK!" "You started last week? At another firm? You didn't even call?" Fred blushed a little. "Well, I called Cheryl and I begged her not to tell you because.... I was too nervous about seeing you again." "OH FRED. THAT'S JUST SILLY. " "Well... if you let me tell you the long version, it'll make sense. Can I treat you to dinner tonight? " John smiled. He began to say something and Fred interrupted. "NO, you can NOT pay for dinner. This is MY treat. How about that place with the cheesecake?" He grinned. "You know, the one with kumquat cheesecake?" "Ho ho. Ok, back to the scene of the crime. I'd love to have dinner. What time.?" Fred gave him a time. He looked like he wanted to say something else, but... he stopped.
"Know who I saw today? FRED. He's working in NY again" John was talking to Pauline and as usual, she didn't look up. "Uh huh. I know. Cheryl told me. " "WHY AM I THE LAST ONE TO KNOW EVERYTHING?" "Cause you fuck things up." "HUH????" "Just teasing you John. So when is the engagement?" "The engagement? What the...." For the first time since they had been working together, John saw Pauline flinch. "Just joking again, John. Seriously. Go talk to Cheryl and have a good time. Tell him to come by."
Fred was already at the restaurant when John got there. "I'm in a SHIT LOAD of trouble" John thought. When Fred stood up to greet him, John saw he was in a tight pair of jeans, and a shirt that.... "You had that shirt when you worked for me." "Ha ha. Good memory." John couldn't forget it. It fit tight, and Fred always rolled his sleeves when he wore it, a look that drove John crazy. Cheryl used to call it Fred's "Dad, I need an advance on my allowance" shirt, and if Fred had asked, he would have gotten it. "You still drink martinis, John?" "Inhale them." "Then let's have a round." "Fred, you like sunrises." "No, Kelly likes sunrises. I just drank them." That was John's first hint. He sat down, they toasted, and then the talk began. "So, you remember the advice you gave me, John: never go to work where your other half works?" "Of course." "Well, I took that to mean you shouldn't go to work at a firm where someone you love works." Fred paused. "That's why I didn't call you to see if I could come back." Sometimes John could be very dense. That moment was one of them. "Oh, you fell in love with someone at my firm?" "Very hard. I had a crush for most of my time there." Fred smiled and stared directly at John, who was still not getting it. "Can I ask who?" Fred began to laugh. "REALLY? Are you teasing more than my cock John?" "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH SHIT!" John thought. He felt Fred's foot graze his. "I fell in love with you a year after I started working there. " John blanched. "I... I had no idea." "Most people didn't. Cheryl figured it out. So did Pauline. But Kelly.... no, she didn't know until.... " "Uh.. I think I can fill this in, Fred. DId you...." "Yell your name during sex? Yeah I did." "How did she take it?" "Well, better than I thought she would've. She told me she suspected that I was gay but... not that I'd fall in love with..." he faked Kelly's voice. "SOMEONE SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH OLDER THAN ME." "ARE you gay, Fred?" "Yeah, I am. I found out after we got back upstate." "I don't understand" Now Fred took a deep breath. "Don't take this the wrong way John. I thought of you the most when I was jerking off or having sex with Kelly, but that firm is full of good looking guys. Where I lived? Not so much. So...." "You did bars." "I did. It was GROSS John. Because again." And now Fred's voice broke. "I kept on thinking of you." He took another deep breath. "Are you seeing anyone ?" "No. After I broke up with steve, just one night stands." "Can I date you John? Starting like, tonight." "OH SHIT WAIT A MINUTE. " John didn't get emotional and when he did, everyone heard it. "Is this some joke you and Cheryl put together?" Fred kept his composure. "If you knew how hard I got when I caught up to you this afternoon and... I haven't taken care of it because well... I was hoping you'd come back to my hotel with me and... we could get started." "DON'T DO IT THIS IS A STUPID IDEA" was what John's guardian angel was screaming into his ear. "Fred, do you have any idea of the kind of stuff I like?" "Yup. " "Don't tell me. Let me guess. Cheryl and Pauline told you." "Let me tell you this John." Fred leaned over and whispered into John's ear. "I want you on top of me and inside of me. I want you to take control like you did when we worked together. And I want it NOW." "I'll regret this," John thought. He said. "THAT may be the last chance you get to tell me what YOU want, fred." He saw the smile on fred's face. "Yes sir." "Now stop playing with my foot. It's aggravating." "Yes sir." "Finish your dinner. We'll head out after. You have rope at the hotel?" "Yes sir. I bought some today." "Confident cocky little shit." "Other fish in the sea Sir but... I hooked the one I went after."
From the way John was smiling, fred assumed, correctly, that he was enjoying the blow job. He didn't know that all of that history was going through John's head. He continued working and John pulled his mouth off his cock. "No. You deserve to get released first. Then... now that I'm nice and hard, heh heh. Best way to start a morning is by fucking a hot little country boy lawyer. "