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Special thanks to Will who helped edit this chapter. Thanks For Reading!
Finding Myself Withing Eric, Chapter 3
The ride home was filled with rush hour traffic but we managed to stay together and get back to my house with ten minutes to spare. I signaled him to follow me up the driveway so we could park around back. When he stepped out of the car I saw his jaw drop.
"Dude this is your house!"
I smiled slightly, "Yeah, too much house for the three of us I'd say."
"There are only three people living here! I thought you had like a thousand brothers and sisters with a house this size."
I laughed a bit. "Well, I do have a sister but she's off at Yale."
"Seriously dude, I don't know why you don't have friends."
"I wouldn't want friends who only liked me because I had a big house."
He smiled and we walked around to the front. When I got there mom was already standing in the front door.
"Well, at least you give me a five minute head start with traffic."
Her eyes seem to widen once she saw Eric beyond me.
"Well, well, well, who is this handsome young fellow?"
I turned to see Eric blush, sticking out his hand to my mom.
"Eric Gorean, Mrs. Delfontoes." He shook her hand .
"Nice to meet you and please call me Marie unless you're a client."
They both laughed and everything just seemed odd to me. "Eric and me are working on an English project together. Do you mind if he hangs here for a bit."
"No problem, anytime. It would be good to have another teenager around for a change, but I have to get going. There is pizza in the freezer if you're hungry. Your father is meeting me at the party so don't expect us till after midnight."
She raced past us out to the car and waved as she speed off. I just shook my head and headed inside.
"So I guess you want a tour huh?"
"Would love one."
Again he was smiling and I was like a snowman melting. I took him around the house showing him the upstairs first and my room, then back downstairs to the living room, game room, and study (rather library). I took him out back to see the pool and clubhouse, and back inside ending with the kitchen.
"Wow! I can't believe you live in this house, it's awesome."
"If you say so." I went to the frig and took us out two cokes.
"Umm... are you hungry?"
"Yea." He said kinda nervously.
I turned around and got the two pizzas out the freezer and popped them in the oven and set the timer.
"We can hang here till they are done. These are like convection ovens, they cook fast. Then we can take them into the game room."
"Cool. So lets talk some more. Tell me another secret."
I was beginning to wonder what was up with this guy and wanting to know secrets. Did he want me to tell him that I have been swooning since the first time I saw him?
"I told you I don't have any secrets. My life is pretty much boring. Why don't you tell me a secret?"
He looked at me and smiled. But his smile was different this time. Like he was trying to put on a happy face or something. I thought that maybe I should comfort him in some way.
"I know we don't know each other much, but I do hope we could be good friends. I like hanging around you so we both might as well start getting the trust thing started."
He smiled sheepishly and gave a simple nod. "Okay. Ready for a big shocking secret?"
I leaned against the counter taking a sip of my coke. "Hit me with it."
He leaned forward and got real close to me. We were both looking into each other eyes, and I started feeling those nervous butterflies in my stomach again. He was so close to me I could feel his breath against my cheek. For a moment it was like he was breathing in my scent. After what seemed like an eternity he said-
"I'm gay."
It was said in only a whisper, just enough to be heard. He slowly backed away from me and took a sip of his coke. I didn't know what to say, what to think. My mind wanted to say I'm gay too, but I wasn't even for sure what I was. All I knew was the feelings I was devolving for him are becoming stronger, and I don't think they are going to stop. I heard the oven go off, and I silently turned around and searched for something to take out the pizza with. I found mom's oven mitts, and took the pizza out, setting them on the counter. "Aren't you going to have a response?" He said looking up at me.
"What do you want me to say? I mean, I'm cool with it don't get me wrong. I try my best not to judge people, and I could care less if you were gay, straight, bi, blue, green or purple."
He started to laugh and it was good to see that smile on his face. I wanted to tell him everything I have been feeling, but my nerves got the best of me. I got out the pizza cutter and started cutting the pizza.
"I like you. And I don't mean the way friends like each other. In the way another boy likes another girl, but in my case boy likes another boy."
I was so caught off guard I didn't feel the cutter go over my finger.
"Shit!"
I quickly moved my finger away from the pizza holding it over the sink. Eric quickly came over grabbing some paper towel, wrapping it around my finger applying pressure.
"You should be more careful." He said calmly. Lifting the paper towel off. "Just a little nip lucky, you will be fine, it's not even bleeding anymore."
He brought my finger up to his lips and gave it a soft kiss. The touch of his lips on skin excited me like no other. It was then he walked away with his head down.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you cut yourself. I should go anyway, I bet with all the stuff I have told you I have over stayed my welcome."
"No! You don't have to leave! It's okay, it wasn't you I just wasn't paying attention to how close my finger was."
I gave a bit of a laugh to lighten the mood, but that didn't seem to ease him any. "At least stay for dinner." He nodded and I grabbed the pizza and headed off to the game room.
"Wanna watch a movie or something?"
I said as I set the pizza and paper plates on the table.
"Sure, what type of movies do you have?"
"Well, my dad buys just about every new release there is and I don't even think he watches them. But we keep them all in alphabetical order so it's not so overwhelming."
I pointed to the wall behind him and it was a complete wall of DVDs. 16' from the ceiling down, full of DVDs.
"Whoa!" Was all he said as he ran over through the wall scanning. I put us each a slice of pizza on a plate and ran back into the kitchen to get us two brand new cokes. When I came back in the room he was sitting on the couch holding a DVD in his hand.
"This is one of my favorite movies." I grabbed the movie looking at the title, Interview with the Vampire.
"Yes, this is one of my favorites to."
I popped the movie in and joined him on the couch. We both began eating pizza, just relaxing. About half way through the movie I felt something brush my hand slightly. I wiggled it a bit at first and leaned further back into the couch. A little bit later I felt it again. Out of the corner of my eye I look down at my hand. I could see Eric's shaking slightly, and then again brushing his fingers against my hand. I smiled a bit to myself, keeping my hand there to see how far he would go. I turned my head back to the movie.
It was only a few more minutes when he started to get a little more bold. He gently placed his hand upon mine. I could feel him trembling a bit and then start to calm down. I looked over at him and he was already looking at me. I think he was surprised that I didn't move my hand. I reached over to pause the movie and I turned to the couch looking at him.
"Sorry... I just..." It was the first time I ever saw him almost lose his composure.
"Hey, listen its okay, I just think we need to talk."
He nodded slowly and I took a deep breath getting ready to bare my soul for the first time to anyone.
"First you need to understand something. But don't let it discourage you. You are like the first real friend I've had. And I'm not used to expressing my feelings or coming out at saying what I think. For God's sake the first time I saw you I had knots in my stomach, I felt like I was going to pass out, I even...cried myself to sleep thinking about you and wondering why was I feeling this was towards another man, when I have had no desire before for either guy or girl."
I paused a bit taking a deep breath again, hoping my newfound nerves would hold up on me.
"Understand that I'm not even sure if I'm....I'm... "
"Gay." he said.
"Yes, I'm not sure what I am. But I do know when I'm around you its like I'm a different person; I begin to care about things, and take an interest. Every time I see you smile, it makes my heart melt. And before today, before I met you I would not have been able to say any of this to anyone."
He smiled, blushed a bit and then looked in my eyes.
"I don't wish to make you uncomfortable in any way. I just can't get my mind off you, I want to touch you, know what your thinking, care for you. Kiss you even. But I do understand. I was like that when I met my first boyfriend. We still need to get to know each other and get used to each other. But as long as you are not saying no, and are at least open to the possibility of seeing how things go, then I'm all smiles."
I smiled at him and nodded. "So shall we get back to the movie?"
"No, sorry. I better be getting home, its past 11."
"Oh wow, I didn't realize it has gotten that late! You okay driving back?"
"Yea, I'm good, I have good memory and if I need it GPS on my phone."
"Okay cool, lets meet here tomorrow, around one in the afternoon. So we can work on our project some more."
"Sounds great."
I smiled walking him to the front door.
"See you tomorrow." I said opening the door.
"Can't wait to see you tomorrow." He said giggling.
He had one last look in each other eyes before he learned forward and gently kissed me on the lips. The most amazing thing I ever felt in my life. He saw the stunned look on my face and smiled walking out the door. I felt like I had been dreaming, as I closed the door and walked back to the game room falling on the couch smiling.