** This story is a true story, telling of people and events that have taken place in the last three to four years. I have the consent of the others who are involved to use them, but no last names will be used for privacy reasons. This story will focus around two people as they stumble upon each during high school and find themselves falling for one another. They are able to survive the trials, tribulations, and difficulties that are thrown at them and from each other until everything comes to an abrupt end...All rights to this story are mine (lol well it is based on MY experiences) so no copying or publishing without my consent!**
Finding Andrew
Chapter 13: Making A Choice
Andrew continued to walk towards me as he was fully dressed now. He spotted Mario and shot me a cold glare.
"Look. This guy is my friend. I need to talk with him for a few minutes. Cool?"
"Oh I see. So this is all about him right? I guess I don't mean shit to you right?"
"You know it isn't like that." Mario overheard and started to walk back towards the house. I grabbed his arm before he could get away. "Both if you are going to listen to me. I understand the two of you don't like each other and that's none of my business...but I do get along with both of you and its going to stay that way whether each of you like it or not."
"Whatever." Andrew said as he turned to walk back. "If you still want to be friends with him, there is really something wrong with you."
"Oh, excuse me!" Mario yelled as he turned to face Andrew. "You act like you're all perfect and such an angel. Do I need to remind you of what you did to him not to long ago." They continued to argue as I just stood there and watched. I was really getting the feeling that there was no way to win with them.
"Fine guys." I said as they both turned to look at me. "I'm not going to argue with either of you. Talk to me when you come to your senses." I walked home as both of them stood in silence. As I reached the top of the hill, I could hear them start to argue again. I shook my head as I went home.
I was left in total isolation for the remainder of my suspension. My emotions were back under control and I was ready to go back to school. It's not like anybody was going to be talking to me anyway, but it beat being at home by myself everyday. My friends avoided calling me or returning my calls. I couldn't go over to Mario's house to wrestle. Speaking of him, he wanted nothing to do with me. The only contact I got was Andrew calling to break up with me. Even that really didn't bother me all that much for some unexplainable reason. It looked like things were going to back to how they did at the beginning of the year, which wasn't a real horrible thing.
When I went back to school that Monday, I got lots of weird looks. I knew why, but ignored them as best I could. I did feel kind of sad to open my locker and find no notes from Andrew. I was so used to starting my day with one. I sat in the library before school to relax before heading to my classes. I had PE that day so I would have to see Andrew. I was to the point that I really didn't care how things got between us. Honestly, I was starting to wonder if the whole thing was a mistake from the beginning. Things were going fine until this year had begun. Mario and Andrew had both been good to me at times, but I wondered if the bad outweighed the good. Was it time to move on and leave them behind? I pondered that as the bell for 1st period rang. I would at least find PE cool because I hadn't talked to Justin since the incident.
As I walked into the locker room the guys kind of gave me a weird look. Some gave me a pat on the back while others looked a little intimidated. I wasn't going to let what was starting to happen even get where it was headed.
"Ok guys. What I did wasn't cool and its something I regret. Yea, I admit it. I did it and I'm not going to blame someone else for it." I looked right at Andrew when I said it and he quickly averted his gaze. "I'm not any different than the guy that you've known all year." I lost what else to say so I just went to change and leave. I was the first out as I sprawled out on the gym floor. Justin sat down next to me gaining my attention.
"Hey Justin."
"Hey bud. That was some crazy..."
"Can we not talk about. I'm sure I'm going to hear it enough in the next few weeks anyway."
"Cool, cool. Uh, what happened with you and Andrew? He's been acted in a bad mood lately."
"Ask him. He's the one that wants to be in charge of everything."
"So you guys broke up?" He asked in a whispered tone.
"His choice not mine."
"Are you going to be ok?"
"Of course I will. It's just a person. How many people live on this planet?"
"Don't say that because I know you well enough to know you don't really mean it." He was right. I was just planning on keeping my guard up. I don't really like to have my emotions led all over the place. I just wanted things to be normal...well as normal as you could expect. I didn't get to respond as others started to come out the locker room. Class started with stretching and warmups as always. I learned that we were in our 5th block and that I got picked for badminton. I'm not the biggest fan of it, but I didn't complain. The teams assembled afterwards and it just dawned on me that I didn't have a partner. I sighed when I saw Andrew headed my way. Someone, somewhere wasn't too fond of me today.
"Great. Just the person I wanted as a partner." I said in a very sarcastic tone. He said nothing as we headed to our designated court. We did play good together (really surprising since neither of us had ever played before) and ended up winning our three games. As class neared an end, we made our way back to the locker room. I had to stay behind to be informed of how many laps I would have to make up...200 plus! That really put me in a sad mood because that is not something you want to hear so early in the day. I headed back to the locker room and started to change back into my regular clothes. By the time I was finished, Andrew was sitting on the bench across from me and we were alone in the locker room.
"We had pretty good chemistry today." He said gleefully.
"Really? Could of fooled me." I closed my locker and put on my backpack. He obviously had something on his mind as he blocked the door.
"We really need to sit down and talk."
"I don't think we do, Andrew. You've made your point pretty clear. If things aren't done the way you want then you aren't happy."
"That's not true..."
"I'm not going to argue with you. You know, its dawned on me in the last few days that I've been really miserable. And do you know why?"
"..."
"Between you and Mario..."
"Don't try to compare me to him."
"Why not? Both of you are alike. You always want your way and when you don't get it, you take it out on everybody else. Real mature, huh?"
"Just like you were in the lunch room?"
"At that moment no. I can admit that though. That's something you hate to do. You hate to be wrong. You even said yourself that you aren't perfect, yet you act and carry yourself like you are. When you can realize that you're human like the rest of us, I'll be waiting." And with that, I left. I really wasn't as ready to deal with stuff as I thought I was. I ended up going home sick that day as I laid in bed wondering if he would ever come around. Would he be willing to treat me as an equal? Why was I trying to change him? How long could I really wait? How long might I have to? I ended up falling asleep as my mind shut down from the overload.
I woke to Mike yelling into my ear.
"Get up! Your match is next!" I sat up instantly and frantically looked around for my gear. I changed there and ran next door just in time. Being half sleep made it a struggle, but I still managed to get into it eventually. I did lose, but it wasn't a big deal. I lost to an up and comer, so there wasn't any reason to be upset or sad. I congratulated him on the win and started to head back home. I was cut off by the other person I didn't really want to see just yet.
"Mario, I'm tired. Can it wait?"
"Fine. Just blow me off like always." He said walking away. I still was tired, but his bitterness forced me to just stick it out a little longer.
"I don't really see how I'm blowing you off when YOU have been avoiding me the last couple of days. What's on your mind?"
"Us as always."
"What kind of 'us' are we talking about?"
"I don't think you understand how hard it is for me to except things the way they are. It's like you're taking a knife and just smashing it into my heart. What makes Andrew so much better than me? Why did you choose him over me?" I could see the tears begin to form in his eyes. I had to focus to make sure that I could speak and think clearly.
"Mario, we've been through this a million times. I'm not choosing him over you. We were best buds before we even found out about each other. I don't want that to change. That means more to me than anything else. Andrew is no better than you. You both just offer different things. I'm not trying to hurt your feelings about this, but we know where each other stands. I've always said that I'm going to have your back in anything no matter what. Friends or not. If that isn't something you can handle..."
"You don't understand, Sam." He reached out to hug me as he started to cry. "I can never be with anybody else. Why can't you feel the same way about me?" He continued to cry as my mind raced to find a logical answer. There had to be one right? I reminded silent for a few minutes as I tried to think of something to lift his spirits, but my mind drew a blank. I knew the one thing that would, but it was something that wasn't going to happen. It's not that Mario was a bad person...ok well at times he has been. But we all have our moments. If we hadn't been such good friends things might me different...then again, he had been the cause of some pretty bad stuff in the last couple of months. Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to give it a shot. This would be something I would have to sit and think about later, but that wasn't the time.
"I'm sorry that I'm hurting you so much. You have to know that I'm not doing this on purpose. I don't really know what to tell you."
"I don't know if I can just be friends with you." He said as he backed away wiping his eyes. That comment stung, but there wasn't anything I could do.
"It's not my choice anymore. We've been through this many times, so I'm leaving the ball in your court. You know that I still consider you my best friend. If that's something you can't accept..."
"I'll think about it." We stood in silence for a few minutes until Mike walked in.
"Everything cool with you guys?"
"Never been better, bro. I was just leaving anyway." Mario said as he slid out the room. Mike shrugged his shoulders and followed him out. I decided to go home and get ready for bed. As I showered I wondered how things would go from here. In a perfect world, I would have the perfect little triangle between the three of us. I knew that there wasn't a way for that to happen and I also knew that there was nothing else I could do in the matter. I had changed a lot since I met Andrew. I became more open with my feelings, emotions, and thoughts. That also caused myself to be more susceptible to hurt and pain. I looked at Mario like a little brother. I couldn't see us stop talking all of a sudden. Both meant a lot to me, but the way things were headed, I was going to have to choose one over the other. I couldn't make both happy as trying was only wearing me down. I continued to think a little more as I dried off and threw on a t-shirt and boxers. It wasn't like it was my decision anyway at this point. They both knew where I stood and it was up to them to decide how things played out from here...
3:00 in the morning, have to be at work in 3 hours, yet I'm up typing this. Go figure. I would leave a longer note here, but I do need to at least get an hour of sleep. Work has been rough of late (40- 60 hours this week and last), so I'm trying to fit in time to get chapters up. My next day off is Tuesday so look for the next chapter to be out that day. Take care guys (and gals...I didn't forget this time)!!
Chapter 14 - Dealing With The Backlash
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