Copyrighted by SkyeRoseNovels
Author: SkyeRose
Feedback Email Address: leslientammy@yahoo.com
Part 4
Why was I still standing there listening to this "child" yell and scream as if she had no sense? I immediately walked to my car. Les was following behind me with this girl, Jasmine, behind her. I got in my car and pulled off. I didn't want her to explain to me. I had some explanations to myself that I needed to sort over.
I got home and sat on my couch in everything that I had worn to work. My mind began to drift and I realized I was sitting in the exact same spot that Les made love to me on. What was I going to do about this one? Obviously everything I thought was, wasn't or rather isn't. But what did I really expect. I broke rules. My own!
No faster that I said I don't mix my business of work into my private life, I went right on and became intimate with this ...stranger. Hell she didn't even share my bed with me... she shared my couch. What was really going on inside of me? I knew better than this. I started to whimper like a child. Which at this moment I felt I was much less than a woman. I was a child.
A couple of hours later I woke up to Les knocking on my door, or rather I thought it was Les. I opened the door and it was Daya.
"Virginia before you tell me to leave, I need you to know that I refuse to. I put in leave time for 3 months and I will extend it if I have to. I am willing to sit on the outside of your door until you realize that I cannot live without you."
Lord why now?
Why, after my fucked up day, and Les and her... whatever that damn girl was to her... acting a fool, did Daya have to show up on my doorstep begging for our relationship to be more?
"Daya, I just can't do this right now."
"No Virginia you are going to do this right now. I messed up. I know. I made you nothing to me and my job and success everything."
"Daya that is...was... not the problem and you know it.", I sighed.
There was an uncomfortable silence and I seen the tears clouding in her eyes. I wanted to just let her walk out the door the same way she did me, but I didn't.
"You know what Daya, you say my job is little and you have no respect for me or anything that I do or did. I didn't do anything right for you anymore. You didn't want to look at me and I was pushed back on your list so far that you actually rather stayed at the job then came home to be with your biggest supporter. I loved that you loved your firm. You don't know how proud I was of you and it was always an honor for me to be the woman on your arm when we walked into places. I loved you."
"Virginia, the only reason that I hated your job so much is because you were so happy. You would talk about it and your eyes would light up. I remember 5 years ago when you talked about how much you loved me and your eyes would light up. But you became so in tuned with yourself that you no longer expressed that love and neither did I."
For 15 minutes we sat there looking at each other in confusion. We both tore down our relationship. I realized the whole time I was away from her I spoke of how she tore down our love and how selfish she was, as if I had no part in it all. I had the leading role actually. This woman, who deep inside loved me deeply was only reacting to me. When I started to love my job, she began to love hers. When I stopped showing her love, she stopped showing me love.
This is what out love had become. But I tell you it took all of that to realize that Les was only a reminder to me of how Daya and I used to be. I remember those nights when Daya came home from working a shift at her not so successful job at the time, and I came home from my day job at a local cafe and night school. We still found time to love. It wasn't the act of making love that made us... "us"...It was the point that we remembered how much we were to each other.
The moments when exhaustion took over our bodies and we found ourselves laid on the couch the next morning in the same clothes we wore the previous day. Daya would be late for work and I would be late for my small day job. But it was that moment that even though she was late for work and I was late for my job, I still stopped before leaving the house to say, "Sweetheart I love you." She would always kiss me and say, "I know Princess."
Our love was time out of our days when her name felt like the most beautiful fabric on my heart. It was time when I would read or see something and know that Daya was thinking of me just because I was thinking of her. We both forgot that we were each other's air for our souls. She was my living spirit and my most delicate gift blessed by the creator.
My love for Daya was not gone. I will merely say it was hidden behind my own self perspective of ideality.
Weeks Turn to Months...Months Turn to Years
Obviously Les is no longer a part of my mind and neither is she a part of my life. She is still at the school and I see her everyday. We cordially say hello and there is nothing more discussed between us.
Daya is the one and only love of my life. She recently formed a partnership with another very intelligent woman who in a sense helps her run things in her job. She gave up time and realized that our love deserved a chance and time was going to be needed to make it whole again. I am actually meeting her in about an hour for a quick lunch because she will have a late meeting with a client. But still we have "our" time.
I am now the head principal at MLK Elementary and I love it. These children are a beautiful part of my life, and they show me truths about myself with every encounter.
By the way, if any of you are wondering just what it means that fate rules all, I shall tell you.
The fate of love is merely an existence. What you do with the fate is up to you.
Daya allowed me to walk out of her life. But her choosing the true fate of our love allowed us to continue with faith in ourselves together.
Les's fate in love is that she chooses not to settle with one woman. She's not a player. She's just frightened to open herself up to something that is not promised to her.
My fate with love is just what it is...fate! It was meant that Daya and I would separate so that we could know exactly what we really were to each other. Past what we meant to each other, we needed to know how we stood together.
Fate in the end rules all....Parts 1, 2, 3, 4...and until the body is nothing more than dust to the ground, it will continue to rule everything.