Falling

Disclaimer: I do not know the BSB I have never met the BSB. This is just a story in other words it's not true. I do not work for anyone that has contact with the BSB and so on this is just a story I hope you like it

Authors note: I have noticed that not many people write BSB stories. So I have decided that I will write as many BSB stories as I can. I might right a few stories about different bands. But don't count on it to much. Ok I use a few different symbol's in my story to help it. These *** mean a character change, right after the *** a name will follow. When I am starting a story off either from the beginning or from the start of another chapter. I will put the name between these ***. Now I'm going to try and stay away from using this but it has happened in the past. These (( )) mean a note from me or a time change. Most of the time I'll just write out the time change. But there are times when I'll get a little lazy so please understand. I will not give my main character any weird powers like my other stories. So this will be the first time that I'll write a normal human story. Which mean's no Sryin's or anything else. I would also like to add that if I start to slip to yell at me to stop. I hope you enjoy the story.

Warning: This story isn't like my other stories it's a lot darker. it involves Rape and a few other things later in the story. You've been warned.

Extra Note: I would like to thank Eddi for saving my sorry butt. I needed some info and he got it for me. He also looked the story over for me and checked for errors. I owe him a lot so I'm thanking him in here. Your a great friend Eddi, thank you for being you. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Raven

I remembered my brother the first time he had become an angel. A bird had fallen from it's nest, he had ran in the house screaming for help. When no one came, he ran back out side and picked the bird up. He climbed up the tree slowly, making sure not to hurt the bird. He placed the bird back in its nest, he was so gentle. Then he waited for its mother to return. To my surprise the bird did come back, it let my brother pet it. I had never seen anything like that. My mother came out of the house and started screaming at him. He fell out of the tree seconds later, he had hit the ground so hard. My mother didn't care if he was ok. She just grabbed his arm and pulled him into the house, he had been crying. She didn't care, but he forgave her for that later that night. She had smacked him and then sent him to his room. He had forgiven her for that to, but not to her face. I had asked him how he could be so forgiving. He said it was his nature. We were only seven, but he was so grown up, so kind. I would never understand how someone could be like that. He was so strong and he didn't even know it, now maybe he never would.

I would always regret not telling him sooner. I had so many things that I wanted to say. I looked out the window again this time seeing myself looking back. The first time I had fallen off my bike, he had been there. He had taken care of me when my parents wouldn't even touch me. He had been my brother and my best friend, my angel. He had always been there for me when I needed him most. I had never really been there for him, not once. I could have helped him so many times but I didn't. I had been so selfish with everything. He had always been so giving and understanding, the tears were coming again. I was thinking too much about this, but it was all I could do to keep from screaming. I had all of these happy memories to keep me sane, but what did he have? He had always been the one to take the fall, never me. I had been sent to boarding school too, but he had been put though so much more. He had taken endless classes and never got any rest. While I got to be the slacker, not that I didn't work my ass off. It was just that they had put him through so much. I could have taken some of the pressure off of him, but I didn't. I enjoyed my freedom, the way I could party and he couldn't. He never let that get to him, but I let it get to me now.

I wondered how much his life would have been different if I had been a better sister. Would he have had a happier childhood, or a better life? The plane was starting to make its drop to land. I had put my seat belt back on while closing my eyes. I could see him smiling back at me, his green eyes. The way he would lift me above the world and keep me safe. The way he had always been there for me no matter the cost to himself. I also remembered the time he had tried to kill himself. I hadn't gone to the hospital to see him at all. I didn't like hospitals; they were a place for the dead or dying. Now I had wished I had gone, he would have known I was there for him. Maybe then he would have trusted me with his secret. Once the plane docked, I was out of my seat and on the way to the door. I hadn't brought any bags, just my money, nothing was going to slow me down. I didn't have time for any of that, not now or ever. I found a cab pretty quickly and got in, telling him where to take me. He just nodded and started the driving, giving me more time to think. When we were younger he always walked three steps in front of me. He said that he would clear a path for me. I had always laughed at him and smiled, he would just grin. I hadn't known it then, but he was warding off guys.

Then he had brought Eric home that first time, I hadn't liked him all that much. He never let Richie do anything by himself. I had invited Richie to a party, Eric wouldn't let him go alone. He wanted to go too, that was one of the first signs something was wrong. I hadn't looked at those signs, none of them. I just kept on moving with my life, never slowing down. I was moving like that now, but this time I needed to be this way. I had to get to him at all cost. Even if it wasn't him, I would know within the next forty-five minutes. I tried to push everything out of my mind, but the more I pushed the more he was there. "Are you alright, Miss?" I looked at the cab driver and shook my head. "My brother was in the plane crash. That's why I'm on the way to the hospital, he may have been the one they found. I don't know for sure, but I have to know." The cab driver nodded his head and then made a sharp right. Five minutes later we were in front of the hospital. I tried to pay the driver but he wouldn't let me, he just wished me luck. I thanked him and ran into the hospital. "I'm looking for the man that survived the plane crash. He may be my brother, please can you help me?" The nurse looked up slowly and looked back at her screen. "The man the brought in is in the IC unit. He's in real bad shape Miss, I'm sorry but he can't have any visitors." This woman didn't know who she was messing with.

I smiled as sweetly as I could as I pulled her over the counter. "Now listen here you bitch, if I can't see my brother now. I'm going to give you a real reason to be in this hospital." The nurse looked a little scared as I pushed her back in her seat. "I just came here from LA, I don't give a damn if I can visit. I just want to see him, just to know if he's my brother." The nurse looked back at her screen and I started to raise my hand. "I'll take you back on my break, but this didn't happen. Wait for about five minutes and I'll come and get you." I put my hand back down and stood against the wall. Five minutes later someone took the nurses place. She walked out and took my hand and walked me back. "Now I'm going to warn you, he doesn't look good. He had a steel pole in his shoulder. When he passed out he fell forward and pushed it the rest of the way though. His leg is broken in three different places, he also had a nasty knock to the head. I don't know how he survived the crash he should be dead. Then to think that he walked over two miles with a little girl. I'm sorry I was so rude to you, but I've had to chance five reporters off tonight. As of right now, he's on life support, he can't breath on his own. He's lost a great amount of blood, maybe to much." I looked at the nurse, her face hadn't changed neither had her voice.

She sounded like a robot, so lifeless and heartless. She must have told hundreds of people stuff like this. "What about the little girl is she ok?" The nurse looked at me and her face changed. "Yes, she's doing a lot better, if it wasn't for him she might have died. I don't think he knew but she had a nasty hole in her side. We had her blood type so it wasn't that hard. We are still waiting for the man's to get here." The woman looked to be in deep thought. "The little girl said that the man wouldn't put her down. That he had carried her the whole way. He said that his reason for didn't give up was because of love." I couldn't hold the tears back, that was Richie, it had to be. "I have to see him please can we hurry?" The nurse nodded and we moved down the hallway quicker. She didn't look so heartless anymore. "The man is in that room over there, would you like me to come with you?" I shook my head and slowly moved toward the window. This was the reason I had come to know the truth. I looked though the window, it was hard to see his face. There was a mask over his face and tubes all over his body. I brought my hand to my face, I couldn't tell. "Nurse, I can't see his face, could you tell me is he has a scar on his leg?" The nurse raised an eyebrow and moved to my side. "He does on the back of his leg, look's like a knife wound." I just nodded and fell to the ground.

It was him, and he looked so bad so far gone. The nurse was trying to help me stand up again. "It's him, oh God, it's him, he can't die, you can't let him die." The nurse had tears in her eyes as she pulled me to a chair. "We are doing all that we can for him trust me, what is his full name?" It took me a second to understand the question. "Richard Wayne, Jr." The nurse nodded and moved away, most likely to let the doctor know. After she was gone I moved toward the door again. I opened it slowly and moved to his side, it was him. I touched his cheek softly, they had cleaned him up a lot. He looked so innocent like this. It was like the years slipped away and he was a child again. I moved his hair off of his fore head. I saw the gash near his temple, it wasn't that deep. "You always were the strong one. I'm so proud of you Richie, I always have been. There're so much I want to say to you. Can you hear me, are you still somewhere in there fighting?" He didn't move to grab my hard, or even flinch a muscle. My tears hit his cheek, he still didn't move. I knelt down beside him and held his hand tightly. "I want you to know that if you don't wake up I'll take care of Nick and Brian. That if you decide that you want to sleep I'll watch them. I love you so much Richie, you have to wake up please?" Still he didn't move, it felt like he was gone.

The nurse had pulled me back out into the waiting room. If I hadn't been crying so hard I would have slapped her. I picked my cell phone out and dialed Nick's number, he picked up on the first ring. "It's him, Nick, and he's in real bad shape you have to come." Nick didn't reply at first, it sounded like he was breathing hard. "Raven I can't, they won't let me come. I have a concert in two days, I can't come." I listened to him for a second and then it clicked. "You know what Nick, you don't deserve him, not at all. He would have dropped everything for you in a heartbeat. I know he would have he's done it before, did you know that? He turned down thirty-five jobs when he was on the road with you. Did you know that the only reason he kept moving was because of you? I'm talking about now, he fought to live for you. The little girl that he saved said so, that he was fighting to see you again. Now all you can say is I can't come, don't even worry about it. I'm sure that if he dies he'll know what kind of person you really are." I hung up the phone and turned it off. I had never been so mad in all of my life, how could he be so selfish? I now hated Nick with all of my being, and I would never forgive him not now or ever.

It had been four hours since I had spoken with Nick. I wasn't that mad at him anymore, he had a job. It was just that he was in some small way turning his back on Richie. I knew for fact that Richie would never do that to him. I had talked to Jake a lot since Richie took off with Nick. Richie had turned down so many jobs to stay by Nick's side. To him it most likely meant nothing, he was happy. That was why I couldn't stay mad at Nick, he made my brother happy. I still hadn't called him back and I wouldn't. I had too much pride to call him back. I said what needed to be said, and I was right. Nick was being selfish in a lot of ways. Richie had told me that he had told Nick not to come out, but, he could have anyway. I was finally allowed to sit with Richie, nothing had changed. I had given them my blood hoping it would help. I was his twin after all, if anyone could help it was me. He still couldn't breathe on his own, that worried me. I had spoken with the little girl, she was so sweet. Her first question was how Richie was doing, I had told her the truth. She had said he would make it, that he was a hero and heroes doesn't die. Those words had almost broken me, because I knew that heroes do die. There was so many things hooked up to him, it was scary.

I sing to him even if he thought that I couldn't. He looked so peaceful, so child like. I was still having flashes of our child hood. His laughter could heal anyone's broken heart. Not many people had heard him truly laugh. It was a sound that bubbled up and broke lose. His eyes would twinkle, his nose would wiggle, it was so cute. I missed all of those things so much now. I hadn't really thought about any of it until now, until it was almost too late. "Come on Rocky, you have to wake up now. People are waiting to see you, you're going to be late. Nick is waiting too, he's really worried about you. I know your still here, you wouldn't leave without saying good bye to me. I know that cause I would kick your ass once I saw you again. Now wake up or I'll tell Nick about that birth mark you had removed." I was trying anything to get to him, but nothing changed. I tried slapping his face lightly. Normally he would have stopped me before my hand touched his face. They said he was in a light coma, his brain waves were still strong. They had also told me they didn't know how long that would last. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep at his side.

It had been three days and still there wasn't any change. His room was filled with flowers from so many people. Rosie had sent him a really big teddy bear, it was cute. I still hadn't spoken with Nick yet. I planned on never talking to him ever again if he wasn't here soon. Their concert was over yesterday, why wasn't he here? It was really starting to get to me, maybe I was more than a little right about him. Then again it could have been what I said to him that night. I picked my cell phone up and dialed Brian's number. "Hello" it was Brian but he didn't sound to good. "Brian it's Raven, where the hell is Nick?" I know I yelled at him but I was upset. I thought he would be here by now, Richie needs him." I heard someone taking deep breaths on the other line. "That's the problem Raven, there are so many news vans outside the hospital. We've been trying to get in there for a while now. It's taking everything we have to keep Nick in the hotel. After you talked to him, he tried to take off. I can understand that Richie is your brother, but we do have careers too. We can't just run in there and not be seen, Raven, we're really sorry." I could understand what he was saying. What I didn't understand was who it was coming from, Brian had never been the cold before. "Ok Bri, that's fine I understand, but I might as well tell you. I wanted to tell all of you in person, but this will have to do." I then stopped and tried to find the right words.

I looked at Richie and closed my eyes, he was getting weaker. "As Nick may recall I told him that Richie was in bad shape. That was an understatement, he may not live another week. His brain waves are starting to fall slowly, I tired everything to wake him up. He is in a coma if you haven't guessed by now, and he may die. I've given my blood to try and help him, I don't know if it'll be enough. He looks so weak Brian, like he's already gone. I don't think he will wake up until Nick is here. Nick is one of the reasons Richie kept moving, kept fighting. That and the little girl, she called him a hero, Brain. Then she said that he'll make it because heroes don't die. Brian, I know that heroes do die, it happens all the time." I had started crying again, he was so close to death's doorway. I couldn't talk anymore, I could handle this on my own. I had thought that I could, that I didn't need anyone, I was so wrong. "Raven, he's going to make it, listen we'll find a way to sneak in, I promise. Nick already has an idea, we might be able to pull it off. Kevin asked if it would be ok if he came too?" I nodded to myself, maybe one of them could reach him. "Tell Kevin if he can wake my brother up he can do anything he wants." I then told Brian bye and went back to looking at Richie.

It had been three hours since I had spoken with Brian. I knew they were trying, but it didn't look like they could do it. "Raven, we're here" I looked up to see Nick standing in the doorway. I ran to him and wrapped him in a hug, he looked worse than I did. "We didn't come alone, in fact a few other people joined us in our sneaking." I looked behind Nick to see Rosie and Jake along with the other guys. I hugged each one of them one by one. "I'm guessing you know who Richie's boyfriend is now." Rosie smiled and started to giggle lightly. "We called her when we found out Richie could die." I looked Kevin, he really was trying to help. "Thank you all for coming, but I'm going to warn you, it isn't pretty." They all walked into the room slowly, Nick was by Richie's side in seconds. "Oh baby, I'm so sorry I couldn't get here sooner." Nick was holding Richie's hand, his tears were so clear. I left the room then, I had to give them their chance. I had to let them fight for him now. "Rachel, where do you think you are going." The voice alone sent chills down my spine. I turned slowly to see my mother and father looking at me. "We've spoken with the doctors, your brother is on life support. We have decided to pull the plug, being his parents and all." I was leaning against the wall, this couldn't be real.

********Nick

He looked so innocent, so weak and childlike. I wanted to wrap him in my arms and leave this place. I had made so many selfish choices in my life, even with his permission. He had told me that everything was all right, that he would always be by my side. Now when he had needed me most I wasn't there for him. I had kept up the charade, the straight guy, the one the girls went wild over. When I could have been here by his side, holding his hand. Raven's words still wondered through my head, had she been right? I still couldn't answer that question, because she was right. Richie had left the choice up to me, and I had chosen wrong. If I had chosen to be with him no matter what so many things could be different. If I had chosen to be open the world, we could have been happy. Someone had placed a hand on my shoulder, I looked up to see Rosie. "It's not your fault Nick, stop blaming yourself." I nodded slowly as the door started to open up. A man that looked a little like Richie stepped in, his face revealed nothing. "I'm sorry, but all of you have to leave now." Kevin stood before the man and shook his head. "We're not going anywhere and I'd like to see you move me." I smiled to myself, I didn't think the little man could move anything.

The man took a deep breath and then left the room. When he came back he had a few men with him. "I would like these people removed from my son's room." I was soon pulled away from Richie, then his father was left alone with him. I was fighting with all of my might, but these guys were strong. Raven was sobbing loudly, a woman was standing over her. "Rav, you've got to help us, your dad's alone with Richie." Her head shot up and the woman standing over her was on the floor. Raven was moving down the hallway so fast it was like blur. The guard that was holding me let go and chanced after her. I kicked one of the guards that was holding Kevin and then took off after Raven. I know that it was like a war behind me. I had to get to Richie I just had this feeling, he was dying. The guard had caught Raven before she got to the room. I ran past him and into the room, his father was smiling at him. "Get away from him, or I'll rip you to shreds." His father slowly turned and looked at me, he looked evil. "So your his boyfriend, how interesting." For some reason his voice strike fear into me. "They're going to set him free soon, maybe he can find redemption in hell. I'll be fair, you can talk with him alone for a few moments. It will be the last time you ever see him, I'll even let your friends say good bye." Then he was gone, soon Raven was by my side.

I couldn't really move, they are going to kill him. "You can't let them do this, Rav, you just can't." She was sobbing while she looked at her brother. "They have papers, Nick, there's nothing I can do. Before Richie had left he had given them the power to let him go. I didn't even know that those papers had existed, I'm so sorry Nick." I walked to his bed side and looked at his face. I would be losing him soon, there was no other way around it. I know that we could keep them out of the room, but we would need food someday. Then the world would find out about Richie and myself. I don't really think I have a problem with that any more. But the others would suffer, and it would all end the same way. I picked his hand up and kissed it lightly, it was so cold. Kevin now stood by my side, Raven had told them everything. Everyone was in tears, everyone but me, I guess it hadn't hit me yet. "We could keep them out of the room, or maybe go to the news." I just shook my head, it was to late for all that. If I had come sooner then maybe I could have stopped that. It was to late and it was my fault, I had let this happen. A doctor walked into the room with a little girl, she was in a wheel chair. "Are you Richie's friends?" I just nodded, it was all I could do.

She moved to my side and picked his hand up. "You know that heroes can't die, he's going to wake up soon. He saved me, he was so strong, and he wouldn't give up. He said that he had to see the person he loved again. Is that you mister, cause if it is you can wake him up. I know you can, it's like sleeping beauty, you have to kiss him." She was so innocent, but the tubes kept me from kissing his lips. Then you had the mask, and everything else. "Well, maybe kissing won't work, why is he wearing all that stuff?" Kevin cleared his throat, the little girl looked up at him. "Honey, Richie's in really bad shape, all that stuff is keeping him alive. The reason they brought you here was to tell him good bye. They are going to turn those things off, so Richie can go to sleep." Her eyes seemed to fill instantly. "They can't do that, heroes don't die, my mommy told me so. He can't die, he just can't, he was like an angel. You didn't see him, he stood up from the ashes. Then he picked me up and carried me to the doctors. He was in so much pain, but he wouldn't stop. He was even crying out to someone called Nick, is Nick here?" I looked up at her, he had cried out for me, and I hadn't been there.

Now the tears came flooding down my face. "Don't cry Nick, he loves you, and he always will. He said so over and over again, he had started chanting it. He couldn't even hear me anymore, but that's ok. When he fell down, he said he would fight his way back to you. So he has to wake up, when they turn those things off, he's going to wake up. So don't cry, he's coming back, I know, I asked my mommy to help. I know she heard me, so she's going to help him for helping me." Two doctors and a nurse walked into the room. "We have to ask all of you to leave, we have to turn everything off now." I couldn't believe what I was hearing, how could this happen. "Could you please give us just a little more time?" The doctors looked to the nurse and nodded, they all left. Nothing seemed real anymore, this was just a nightmare. I would wake up soon and find out that this was all a dream. That Richie was fine, that he had never gone to Florida. Then I looked at the little girl, she was trying to wake him up. Her hair fell over her eyes as she talked to him softly. The room was so dark all I could really see were the out lines of everyone else. The little girl seemed to have a spotlight on her. If it was all a dream and Richie hadn't gone to Florida, would she still be alive?

I knew that if I could go back he wouldn't let me change it. Even if he knew that he was going to die. He would gladly give his life to save someone, to save an innocent. I guess he would be right, but I would still try to change it. I was selfish in some ways, I was selfish with him. I couldn't face the world knowing that I had lost him, and they would never know. Kevin was talking to Richie, I hadn't even seen him move to my side. "I know I've hurt you, and I'm so sorry. I know you forgave me, but I can't forgive myself. It was my fault that you went after Lou. It's my fault all of this happened and I'm so sorry Richie. I just hope that I can find a way to make you proud of me. I'm seeing a doctor three times a week now. When I'm on tour I talk to her over the phone, I will make you proud. I'll never repeat the same mistakes, I promise you that." Raven had moved to Kevin's side, I feared what she would do. "It wasn't your fault Kevin, Richie did what he wanted any time he wanted. He wouldn't want you to blame yourself, and neither do I. I'm sure he would tell you that himself, if he could. I'm sorry I've been so hard on you, I'll make it up to you." They were hugging one another, the world was ending. It made everything real, this wasn't a dream, or a nightmare, it was life.

Brian walked up next, his voice was so soft. "You saved me more than once, I don't know how to thank you. You gave me a home and a family, you are my friend. You've forgiven me for things I thought no one would. You gave me hope that someday I would be happy. I wish I could trade places with you, to give you another chance. I would do it in a heartbeat, Angel is right, you are a hero. In my life you were an angel sent from heaven. I promise that I'll take care of Nick, and Raven. I won't let either one of them get hurt. I'm also going to see my father in a few weeks, I'll give him a hello for you." Brian kissed his forehead and slowly moved away. He didn't make it to far, he broke down and started crying. Then Howie walked up, he looked a little worried. "I never really got to know you, now I wish that I had. I knew that you were a good guy, even when you were bad. Here's something a little scary, I knew you would go down like this. I knew that you would die saving someone else. It just seemed to make sense, you are a hero. It's in your blood, always has been I guess. Remind me in the next life to get to know you better." Then Howie moved away, AJ walked up his sunglasses were off.

"I know that you think I wasn't watching. I was, I saw what you did for Nick everyday. You made his world go around and around. You also gave me a few ideas on style, not that you would admit that. You were always pretty damn cool for a model. I guess you still are, but I didn't see you as a hero. I didn't see you as some angel sent from heaven. I saw you as a person, a human with flaws. Even with that you still managed to amaze me. You are a great human being, and a strong one at that. I'm proud that I know you, that I got the chance to see how brave a man can be. You give me hope that someday this world might turn out ok. I'm not going to say good bye, cause good byes are final. I plan on seeing you again, I still have faith you'll pull out of this at the last minute. So I'll be waiting for you until then." AJ moved to the door way and looked out of the room. Raven move forward her hands shook lightly. "What can I say that I haven't already, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you when you needed me. I'm sorry that I never gave you a break. I love you Richie, you're my brother, my twin. I know that when you're gone, my life will never be the same, and you know that. Everyone that you have touched will never be the same. I don't want to say good bye, so I won't." She moved to AJ's side and looked out into the hallway.

Jake walked forward he looked like nothing was happening. "RJ, you never let anyone push you around so why start now? I mean come one I know your stronger than this, get you ass out of that bed." He took a few deep breaths and then looked at me. "If I have to say good bye then I will. I don't like the idea all that much, you are a good person, better then most. I knew that the first time I saw you, so I used it to launch you into stardom. Then like magic you were what I knew you could be. I'm going to miss you kid, so I'll catch you later in the fluffy place." He shook his head and moved away slowly. Rosie moved up but she stopped, her eyes were watering. "I never really got to know you, but that's my life. The time that I met you meant a lot to me, more than you'll ever know. It was so hard to believe that there was a person out there with a heart like yours. I know that after everything is said and done, you'll still be known as a hero. What the world will never know, is what kind of hero you are. To me your so much more than a hero, and you always will be. So take as much time as you need, sleep well." As she moved away I knew that it was my turn, but I didn't want it.

I looked at the tubes, the mask, and then him. "I love you, and I always will, you are my once in a life time. Every second I was with you was like heaven. Every second we were apart it was like hell. I planned on touching the stars with you when we were old and gray. I never thought this would end, not like this. I've always been selfish, at least when it came to you. I feel like I'm falling into a world without light or love. Falling into pain and darkness, falling without you to save me. Your arms were like wings, I felt so safe. If it hadn't been for you, I would never have known love. Not pure love, not true love, without you I would know nothing of love. I thank you for giving me that gift. I will carry it with me always. There will not be a day passes that you are not in my mind and heart. I've told you before that I loved you, but I never understood how much. Now I do, I know that love is so much more than a word. I'll love you forever, Richie, and I'll be waiting until I'm in your arms again." I kissed his hand softly as the doctors walked in. As everyone left the room, I just sat beside him. When Brian pulled me away I looked back, this was the end. I heard something shut off, I could hear Richie choking on something. It was like he couldn't breathe. I wanted to run back but Brian wouldn't let me, they were killing him. I was so powerless to stop it, no words could ever describe how I felt just then. I watched as the door closed, it was like my world ended.

To Be Continued