Falling

Disclaimer: I do not know the BSB I have never met the BSB. This is just a story in other words it's not true. I do not work for anyone that has contact with the BSB and so on this is just a story I hope you like it

Authors note: I have noticed that not many people write BSB stories. So I have decided that I will write as many BSB stories as I can. I might right a few stories about different bands. But don't count on it to much. Ok I use a few different symbol's in my story to help it. These *** mean a character change, right after the *** a name will follow. When I am starting a story off either from the beginning or from the start of another chapter. I will put the name between these ***. Now I'm going to try and stay away from using this but it has happened in the past. These (( )) mean a note from me or a time change. Most of the time I'll just write out the time change. But there are times when I'll get a little lazy so please understand. I will not give my main character any weird powers like my other stories. So this will be the first time that I'll write a normal human story. Which mean's no Sryin's or anything else. I would also like to add that if I start to slip to yell at me to stop. I hope you enjoy the story.

Warning: This story isn't like my other stories it's a lot darker. it involves Rape and a few other things later in the story. You've been warned.

Extra Note: I would like to thank Eddi for saving my sorry butt. I needed some info and he got it for me. He also looked the story over for me and checked for errors. I owe him a lot so I'm thanking him in IM and here. He's a great friend of mine, so thanks Eddi. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Richie

I couldn't believe what I had been told, but it made sense. I had ended up holding Kevin in my arms while he cried. After he had told me the whole story, he asked if I would stop by every so often. He didn't want off the punishment, he just wanted to talk to me every so often. I had told him I come by and hang out with him every once in a while. I hoped that I would be able to do more than that. It was going to be hard telling Nick and Brian what had happened to Kevin. I was having a hard time believing it myself, I would have never guessed. I found myself sitting near the pool, I watched the water. I hoped it would calm my nerves, if it didn't I would lose it. I knew the guys would be leaving for the arena soon. I couldn't face Nick or Brian yet, so I sent a note up to them. I had to think about how to tell them. It wasn't like it was something that was easy to swallow. I stripped down to my underwear and jumped into the pool. I started swimming laps one after another, I had to clear my mind. I could still hear his words in my head, they were so clear. I had asked him to repeat himself a few times, I had to be sure. About half way through the story I had ended up holding him. He kept talking but it was like he wasn't there anymore. I knew that he needed help but I didn't know how much.

If something like that had happened to me, I wouldn't finish the thought. It was too painful and scary, it made my whole body shake. To think that it had been more than one person to rape Kevin. Then to find out how long they had done it to him, that was another story. I had met one of the men that raped Kevin and the other man no longer came near them. He used to be their manger, while the one that had started it. The words sent chills up my spine, he had tried to get help then. He had gone to his manger when he could. That didn't stop it, it only made everything worse. It was so graphic, I could see his words coming to life. I knew one of the men that had done this to him, that had started it. I had even let the man stay at my house while I was away. To think that man had raped Kevin for over ten years. Then for it just to get worse when he tried to get help. It would mess everyone up, I could now understand why Kevin had gone after Brian. In some small way it was revenge, even if it wasn't Brian's fault. All of the pieces had fallen together, even why he had raped me. He had finally told me the whole truth, he didn't do it to hurt me. He was in love with me, or so he thought, so he raped me. It was the only way he knew how to show love. It was sick and twisted, but that wasn't all his fault.

I pulled myself out of the pool, my body ached. I had overdone it, but that was good, I needed the pain. I had to have something to take my mind off of the thoughts running around in my head. I pulled my clothes back on and went up to my room and took a shower. I locked my door, I did every time I entered the shower. I always would, no matter where I was. I got out and got dressed, but I still felt like I needed to do something. I left the room and grabbed my wallet, I needed a haircut, it was high time. I left the building in my normal sunglasses and hat. I walked to a hair stylist and told them to take my hair up to my shoulders. After two hours of doing different things to my hair I felt better. I had put some red high lights in along with a little blue. I needed the change, it would do me some good. After they were done I looked into the mirror and smiled to myself. I looked wild and free, it was amazing what a new style could do for you. I walked back to the hotel. It was well past ten the guys should be getting back soon. I went up to my room and laid down, I didn't plan on falling to sleep but I did.

"Richie, wake up man, we're here like you asked." I opened my eyes to see Brian and Nick standing over me.

I pulled myself up and out of the bed. I shook my head a few times. "Nice, but really did you need us here to see your new dew?" I shook my head again I had thought of a hundred ways to start this. "I know who raped Kevin, guys, but it wasn't his father." I had their attentions now that was easy to see. "Ok I'm not going to say any names yet just listen ok?" Both of them nodded slowly and looked to one another then me. "When Kevin was nine someone started giving him nightly visits. They started out just playing with one another, then it got serious. It got into a little pain then more pain, this happened every time he would visit the house. He would try to make up reasons not to come but they always failed. Then when the band started, he tried to get help, only to make it worse. Shortly after that he got drunk one night and paid Brian a visit. He then turned the tables and started getting his revenge. A few years later things changed but he still had a lot of hate built up. I also found out he didn't rape me to hurt me, he did it because he loved me. I know it's not how a normal person show's love, but it's all he knows." Brian's eyes had gotten wide and his breathing was getting uneven. He had tears falling from his eyes. He was putting the pieces together himself, or so I hoped.

Nick looked really confused, he should be, he never knew. "I could have stopped this before it even started." I looked at Brian and shook my head slowly, he was taking it the wrong way. "Brian you were only four when it started you couldn't have done anything." He was shaking his head, the tears streaming down his face. "No, I used to hear the cries coming from the shed, I could have stopped it. When I eight I almost walked into my parents room. I stopped when I heard the cries, I was too scared to go any closer. Don't you see Rich, if I would have done something then my father wouldn't have raped Kevin." Nick's head had jerked up and he was looking at Brian, with shock and fear. His eyes slowly turned to me with disbelief. He wanted me to confirm it, I couldn't what Brian was saying was true to a point. "Bri, it wasn't your fault you were too young to do anything." He was slowly calming down, his breathing had returned to normal. "Wait but you said that someone else started doing the same thing, who was it?" I took a few deep breaths and looked back up at them. "It was Lou Pearlman, Kevin had gone to him for help, only for Lou to take advantage." Brian was nodding and looking around the room for something. "Then I think it's time to get Kevin some help." I nodded to Brian and looked to Nick for his answer.

Nick was deep in thought, his eyes looked dazed. "I don't know, it just sounds so unreal. I mean I think he should get some help, but does that mean he shouldn't pay for what he's done?" I looked to Brian, it was something I had asked myself a few times. "No, it doesn't Nickie, it just means that maybe he's been paying for longer then we thought. I know he needs to pay, but I think Richie's right. He needs help more than punishment, he needs help and a lot of it." Nick was nodding and starting to smile again. I was thanking my lucky stars that he didn't choose to not help Kevin. "Brian, could I ask you a few questions?" His eyes locked with mine, it was like he was reading me. He nodded very slowly, and sort of looked away. "Did your dad ever do anything to you?" He shook his head, and I started nodding. It was like one really big circle, Kevin then Brian, and then me. It all started with one man that I planned on having a nice long talk with. The second man was on my list, I was going to pay him a nice visit. I had to plan it just right ,so Nick would never know I went after their ex-manger. Brian on the other hand, would be by my side when I faced his father. "I think we should all go see Kevin in the morning. It's time that we break this circle, once and for all. It's time for the healing to start and never stop." I was starting to feel old talking like that, but it made me feel stronger.

The next morning we all got up at the crack of dawn. We got dressed and walked down to Kevin's room. I knocked on the door and he answered a few minutes later. He looked scared when he saw Brian and Nick by my side. "It's ok Kev, we all come in peace. We all need to talk." He nodded slowly and let all of us enter his room. "We as a group of three have decided you need help. You don't have to be by yourself anymore, but you do have to see a doctor. You know what kind of doctor I'm talking about, we want to help. I'm willing to help you as much as I can. If that means driving to the doctor everyday then I will. The guys are willing to try and forgive you with time, I already have. I want to be your friend and nothing more. I'm with Nick and I hope that I always am, God willing. I know it's going to take some time but everything does. I'm going to have a talk with the others a little later today. Now it's up to them if they talk to you, I have no power over that. But you will always have me to talk to, that I promise you. I know I broke your trust by telling them, but I had to. I had to find a way to help you and this was my only choice I hope you can forgive me." Kevin had tears falling from his eyes as he looked to Brian. "I'm really sorry Bri, it just got out of control. I never meant to hurt you, but every time..." He trailed off do to Brian wrapping him in a hug.

Kevin broke down crying, Brian was the only thing keeping him from hitting the ground. I smiled to myself, it was an act of pure kindness. It had taken me time to make a move like that. Nick held onto my hand and smiled, he leaned over and kissed my cheek. I just smiled and thought about my plans. I was going to teach a few people lessons in living. I couldn't do what I did to Kevin to them, but I could get a good punch in. When Brian and myself went to see his father, it was going to be interesting. I had plans for both of them, it was something that was always on my mind. I had called Raven and told her everything, she still wouldn't forgive Kevin. I could understand that but I wasn't going to give up yet. I could really help Kevin, and that's what I was going to do. I talked with Howie and like I had thought he wasn't mad at him anymore. AJ said he would think about it, but it would take a lot of time. I had thought that much, but things were starting to get better. I had talked Brian into letting me face his father with him. He had agreed after two hours of me begging and bitching. When we got back to the states it was the first place we were going. Kevin was going to see a doctor as soon as we got back. I was spending a lot of time with him along with Brian.

We were on a plane back to the states, it was the coolest plane. I was going to jump on another plane once we got back. I told Nick that I had to go see my agent for a few hours. He had given me his puppy dog face and I almost caved in. I told him that I would be back before they went anywhere else. He finally agreed to let me go, so I got on a flight to Florida. I slept most of the way, it wasn't a cool plane it was just a normal plane. I got off the plan and went to a hotel for the night. The next morning I walked into a really nice business building. I asked the lady behind the front desk if I could see Lou Pearlman. She asked if I had an appointment, I told her no that he would want to see me anyway. I told he my name and took a seat, thirty minutes later he walked out. "I'm sorry, Mr. Wayne is it, I don't know who you are." I stood up and smiled brightly, then slightly giggled. "I know that, but I know you, and I have an offer for you. Could we speak in your office, or would that be to much trouble?" He shook his head and led me into his office. He closed the door behind me and took a seat behind his desk. I sat down on his desk and smiled sweetly. "You see Mr. Pearlman, and I use the Mr. real lightly. I know what you did to Kevin Richardson." He got pale really quickly and started taking deep breaths.

I made my way around his desk and picked him up so he could face me. "Kevin is a pretty good friend of mine. You hurt him real bad, so now it's pay back time. I know that you're not the only one to hurt Kevin, and he's next on my list. I was a little surprised you didn't know me. I was no Rosie after all, but that's ok, it makes this easier. I get to be a bigger bitch then I'm being now." I threw him back into his chair then spun around back slapping him. He looked shocked and scared all at the same time. I laughed at him and moved toward him again, he didn't move. "You see, if you really want to press changes on me that's fine. But then I would have to be forced into telling them why I was here. I know you wouldn't want that, since Kevin would back me up. Then you would be the one behind bars, and I would be free. It might hurt Kevin a little in his career, but not much. He's married now, and after all the world thinks him straight. So I have the cards in my hands don't I?" He was nodding but looked like he was changing. He jumped from his seat and charged me. He took me down and I hit my head really hard, but that only made me mad. I tossed him to the side and then I was sitting on his chest. I punched him a few time, then I slapped him. "That was a huge mistake Lou, now I'm going to hurt you." He was trying to fight back, but it didn't know him any good.

I left his office felling very good about myself. My fist hurt a little, but it would heal in time. I got in a cab and asked him to take me to the airport. I got there and I was still in a good mood. I got a first class ticket to LA and then boarded my flight. I had a nice long talk with the person that sat beside me. She was a really nice lady that was going to see her grandchildren. When the plane started shaking badly I didn't pay it any mind. It had happened on every flight I had been on. It was nothing big, but then it didn't stop and I smelled smoke. I picked up the airplane phone located right in front of me, slide my credit care , and dialed Nick's number. Brian picked up after three rings, I didn't know what to say. "Brian, it's Richie, I didn't go to New York I went to Florida. The plane is having some trouble, and it's starting to scare me. I need to speak with Nick now." Brian didn't even reply I just heard him scream something and then Nick was on the phone. "Hey baby, I just wanted to hear your voice." Nick was taking deep breaths, Brian must have told him. "Why did you go to Florida Richie?" I took a few deep breaths and told him. The plane was starting to dive downward but I kept my cool. "I don't know if I'll make it, so you have to promise to take care of Raven. I love you Nick, don't ever think I didn't." Then there was a loud nose and all turned to darkness.

********Nick

I head a loud nose and then a lot of static, I was taking deep breaths. I looked to Brian and started shaking my head. "I didn't get to say good bye." It was all I could think of, I didn't tell him that I loved him back. "It doesn't mean he's dead Nick, maybe his phone went out." I shook my head, I had this feeling in my chest. I didn't know if he was dead, but I knew he was hurt. I could almost feel it in my soul, he was hurt badly. "I have to get to the TV I have to watch the news." Brian was nodding as I ran toward the TV, this couldn't be happening. The news didn't have any information, yet most likely they wouldn't for a while. I knew that I had to be on stage in less then three hours. I didn't know if I could do that, not with this. "Brian let's head to the arena, I want to be with the other guys." He nodded and moved toward the door, he looked worried. I felt kind of numb at the moment, he could be gone. I knew that, but it didn't seem to sink in. He was too strong to let something like this stop him. I hadn't even noticed that I had gotten in a car or that it had stopped. I looked around and saw that we were at the arena. I walked in slowly and someone tackled me. I looked up to see Raven smiling down at me.

I didn't know what to tell her, she looked so happy. Her face changed when she got a good look at mine. I guess I had been crying a little, and I couldn't speak. She started shaking her head as she stood up. "Where is he Nick, I was told that you knew. I already called Jake, and he doesn't know. About thirty minutes ago I got this really weird feeling. Where's my brother Nick, is he ok, is he?" All I could do was shake my head. I didn't know but, this I hadn't thought about, it hadn't even crossed my mind. I didn't think I would see Raven so soon. I just thought that she would be waiting till she got a call from Richie. Brian pulled Raven away from everyone else and told her what we knew. The scream I heard was filled with so much pain, it rocked me to my soul. The other guys were running toward us now. Raven was on the floor crying very hard, her hands pressed firmly to the ground. "What's going on, is everyone ok?" It was Kevin, he looked beyond worried. Raven stood up slowly and walked toward him, she looked wild and evil. "You did this, you monster, it's all your fault." Kevin looked confused and started backing away slowly. "He went there because of you, and now he could be dead." Kevin was still backing away almost ready to run.

Brian put his hand on Raven's shoulder and stopped her for a brief second. She turned on him, her eyes look like a green fire. "Get your hand off my shoulder Brian, unless you want to lose it." He removed his hand like she had burned him. She turned back to Kevin who looked more lost then ever. "Richie called me from the plane, he said it didn't look good. He told me he loved me, then the line went dead after a loud nose." I had everyone's attention, Raven moved to my side and hugged me. "He can't be gone, he's to strong for that, he just can't be." I looked up into Raven's eyes those had been my thoughts. "None of the news stations know anything yet." I found myself now surrounded by arms. Kevin was even in the mix somewhere but it didn't help any. I just had this feeling in my gut that he was gone. The world would never even know that I had loved him. He was my everything, I knew that in my heart. Without him nothing really mattered anymore. He had been my reason for getting up every morning. He was like my peace of mind. Just knowing that he was with me no matter what. Now all that could be over now and forever. I pulled myself off the ground with the help of the others.

*******Richie

I knew that my body hurt everywhere, I knew that I was bleeding. What I didn't know was where I was. There were a lot of trees, and I wasn't the only one on the ground. I had been sucked out of the plane. Then I fell for a long time before I started hitting things on the way. I now found myself on my back looking up to the stars. They looked so beautiful, it was such a peaceful place for a nap. I heard no other sounds coming from anywhere. Everyone was be sleeping like I should be. I was only missing one thing, I was missing my Nick. He was in my arms, and I wasn't in his. I pulled myself up slowly sending shooting pains threw my whole body. I knew that something was in my shoulder, and it hurt. I wanted to cry but I would have time for that later. I looked at the other people around me, it made me sick. I had never seen anything like this, it was too real. I had thought that movies were good at making things look real. They were no where near real, this was real. I saw arms but no body connected to them. I pushed myself to my feet slowly. That was a huge mistake since it made my vision blur. I leaned against the tree and looked around. I couldn't see the plane anywhere, just bit's and peace's.

I heard the soft cry of a child, I followed the sound. There was a little girl crying beside he mother. Her mother was gone, but the little girl didn't know that. I looked my shoulder there was a seven inch steel pole lodged there. I knew it was also sticking out of my back slightly. I could feel it every time the wind would blow, it stung. "Hello little girl, are you ok, did you get hurt when you fell?" She looked up at me tears streaking down her face. "My mommy held me while we fell, but she won't wake up. I'm ok but I think my mommy needs to see a doctor." I didn't have the heart to tell her that her mother wouldn't need a doctor. "Ok can you walk, we'll go look for one." As she tried to stand I noticed that her leg was broken. "Here let me help you." I picked her up with my good arm and carried her. I had to get closer to the plane it was the only way they would find us. I noticed that my right leg wasn't as good as I had thought, but I wouldn't put the girl down. "My name is Angel, what's yours?" I smiled at her, she did look like an angel. "My name is Richie, who else was on the plane with you and your mommy?" She closed her eyes and thought about it. "No one, my daddy is waiting for us in LA. It's my birthday tomorrow, my daddy and mommy were going to take me to see the BSB." I smiled to myself, I could make that happen.

I was starting to have shooting pains in my chest and leg. "My mommy isn't going to wake up is she Richie?" I stopped for a second and looked into her eyes. "No honey she isn't, she's with God now." She started crying slightly, I joined her but started moving again. "Will I get to see my mommy later in heaven?" I nodded and smiled at her she was so innocent. "But you have to wait a while, will you do that for me?" She smiled at me and nodded slowly. "Richie how do you keep walking, you look like your hurting?" I looked at her and decided that I would tell her the simple truth. "Love, I want to see the person I love again, so I have to keep going. Plus I want to make sure you see your daddy again. I'm sure he's worried sick, he loves you so much." She was smiling, I could see the plane up a head. I still had over a mile to walk I just hoped I would make it. I held her to my chest and kept walking, I started seeing spots. I had to make it to the crash site. There could be other people alive maybe they could help Angel. I wasn't worried about myself so much anymore. I knew that Nick would be ok in the end, he had the guys. I knew that it would be hard on him, but he would survive. Raven would make with their help, I knew she would. She was so strong, stronger then I was or ever would be.

********Nick

The concert had gone great, well I guess it went great. I hadn't really been there, I slipped into auto mode. I was too worried about Richie to really think about anything else. The news had found out about the plane crash. So far no one had been found alive, I ignored that small fact. Some people had been pulled out of the plane when it was crashing. The news also knew that Richie had been on that plane. It was sending shock waves into the world. Rosie had called Richie's agent to find out if it really was Richie. After she found that out she did her show asking for a moment of silence. She and everyone in the crowd prayed that he would make it. It had been a sweet thought, but it didn't help with the facts. I didn't know if he was alive, but not everyone had been found. Richie was one of the missing, it just added to my worry. If he had been pulled out of the plane, I wouldn't finish that thought. Raven hadn't stopped crying yet, she just held on to anyone that was within reach. I had to act like nothing had happened, as did the other guys. Kevin seemed to be taking it the worse, it was weird. I had thought that Kevin was just playing a game but he wasn't. He had even started crying when he sang a song. It had happened before on the same song. We had been singing Show Me The Meaning, it was the song that hit us all.

Raven was running toward me at full speed, the girl could move. "They found someone alive, but they don't know who he is. He was caring a little girl but passed out once he screamed for help. He didn't have any ID on him and the little girl's in bad shape. I'm getting on a plane and heading to the hospital. I'll call you once I get there, so keep your cell phone on." I could only nod, my heart was doing back flips. This was what I had been hoping for, a glimmer of hope. I knew I couldn't go with her, but I could wait for the call. I watched as Raven ran out of back doors of the arena, she was moving so quickly. I had to tell the other guys, but would that be wise. I mean if it wasn't him, and he really was dead. It would hurt more than ever, our hopes crushed, my tears stopping only to start again. I would wait until I heard from Raven, that way I knew what to tell them. That way I would know if my tears would ever stop. I now had hope, and with hope came a darker feeling. It was the fear that I would soon learn he was in fact dead. That I would never see his smiling face. He would never again be in my arms or I would be in his. The fear took over and killed all hope. With the hope gone the darkness took hold of my soul. I fell to the ground and let the tears flow, I would cry him a river. If I was to lose him now then I would cry until I was in his arms again.

********Raven

I didn't really know what I was doing on plane. I was on a plane to Tucson Arizona, that's where the hospital was. They had crashed in Coronado National Forest. I didn't even know that there was a forest in Arizona. The main reason I thought this was crazy was because I was on a plane. My brother could be dead because of one these things. Here I was riding on one to see if he was alive, I could die before I ever found out. I didn't even know if it was my brother that they had found. All I knew was that I had to know for fact that it was him, or it wasn't. I kept my radio on as I listened to the news stations, I had to switch every so often. All of them were on the same page so it was ok, for now anyway. The news was calling my brother a hero, at least I hoped it was my brother. If it wasn't I didn't know how I was going to tell Nick. They were calling him super man, since it was a miracle he had walked that far. They said that his right leg was broken in three places. Yet he somehow carried the little girl over two miles. That was all they had on him so far. I wondered how he could have done that, he was never really big on pain. He hated needles and a lot of other things, I was starting to have doubts. They said that no one else had been found alive. That now almost everyone was accounted for, it ripped at my heart.

I didn't want to lose him again, not like this. I had been fooled into believing he was dead once. I still couldn't believe that I fell for it, he was my twin brother. I should have known he was alive, no matter how many lies were told. I had known he was gay for a lot longer then he knew. I had thought Eric was hurting him, but I never asked him. At first I thought they he and Eric were just really good friends. That was until one night I heard him cry out in pain. I ran to his room and almost beat the door down. When he opened it he had a bloody nose and a busted lip. He had told me that he had fallen out of bed. That Eric had accidentally pushed him out of the bed, but he was ok. I had let it go at that, I just didn't want to believe he would let that happen. Now that I thought about it I had failed him in so many ways. I knew that he would never look at it that way, he just couldn't. He had forgiven his rapist, I still hadn't and never would. The tears that had fallen from Kevin's eyes had been real. That had surprised me to no ends, he had cried over him. I didn't know maybe I would forgive him someday, if he gave me a good reason. The reason I had come to LA was to get away from Richie. I couldn't face him everyday knowing I had failed him.

I loved him with all of my heart and soul, but I couldn't face him. I had always thought I would have that time. That he couldn't be taken down, not now or ever again. This was proving how wrong I really was. I could have already lost him this time it would be for real. I had been such a fool to think I would have all the time in the world. My mind was spinning with so many ideas and memories. I remembered my brother when he was a little boy. He was perfect in every single way, it was what our parents wanted. I hated my parents now more than ever before. That wasn't saying much I had always hated them, but there were all I had. Now maybe that would be true again, only they would never see me again. I kept looking out the window, I could see Richie falling from the sky. His arms stretched out and for some reason I could see wing's coming out of his back. He had always been an angel in my eyes and he always would be. That was true at least in my eyes and it always would be. If my brother died I knew that he would go to heaven, I just knew. I could feel the tears sliding down my eyes, he could be gone already. The thought just wouldn't leave my mind for to long. I was getting angry that the plane hadn't landed yet.

To Be Continued