Disclaimer: This is a story about gay people...if you can't read it or don't like gay people, leave. Go...bye. But if you like it, read it and write to me.
Chapter 4: When Did your Heart go Missing
"So he kissed you?" Hannah smiled as we walked down the hall together.
"Yeah. It was kinda sloppy. " she looked at me, " But I like sloppy, who doesn't like sloppy, right?"
Hannah nodded, then stopped.
"What?" I asked, stopping and looking back at her, " What's wrong?"
"You kinda have to do this on your own." Hannah said solemnly.
I turned and looked at it, the bold, red letters on my locker. I frowned and tossed my bag on the floor, causing it to crack. I looked down to see the crack, Marco's face on one side and Davis' face on the other, and the locker opened...
I sat up quickly, sweating hard and breathing deeply, " Oh crap...that's not good." I said, shocked.
I had been suspended, very suspended, but the thing was it all went away. Apparently the school found the number to my parents, which I didn't even know, and called them. They must have said something very convincing because the next day was all about me in school. The gossip was that I had just attacked the guy for no reason...there was also one where I had ran away and was staying with someone who was like fifty. There was one about shrimp that still puzzles me, but I tried really hard to ignore whatever I heard, cause people were scared. To them, I was contagious. I kept my head in the sky as I passed everyone in the hall. I stopped in the mall area, where most of the campus was and stood as all the chattered stopped. I saw Hannah and Marco stop also.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't the school's newest gay guy." Christina said smuggly. Ballard followed quickly behind her.
"Leave the guy alone," Ballard chuckled, " His boyfriend my come out of his ass long enough to kick one of ours."
I felt it. That one tear that won't stay where you want it. It dropped and I smiled, embarrassed at the comment.
"Awww, it's no fun. Now he's crying." Christina said quickly.
From the corner of my eye, I saw Davis and his friends. I think I saw everybody and I felt like fighting back, I felt like making the leap and just...but I couldn't. I was an inch away from being at home watching my soaps. I could feel my eyes grow large in my head and the water was coming, so I brushed past them.
Julie walked up to Christina, " CHRISTINA! That was harsh, way too harsh! He's never done anything to you." she said.
"What is your problem?" Christina asked.
"The problem is that that was uncalled for!" Julie said, following behind me.
As I got to my locker, I could still feel people watching me and I stopped when I saw my locker. The paint had been scrubbed away and my locker was paler, but looked way better. Like home. I crossed the distance and swung my locker open, reaching for my books and slamming my backpack into it and headed off to class.
I was sitting alone by the cafeteria, reading when I felt someone standing beside me. I looked up to see Julie Rison, a girl whose boyfriend had died when the crazy son-of-a...guy came into the school and shot everyone he could.
She smiled down at me, " Hi, umm, you don't know me, but I'm..." Julie started.
"Julie. Julie Rison, last year's prom court and member of about every school club." I said quickly.
She smiled and sat down, " I've never seen you in any of the clubs." she said.
"I..don't. I'm not a team player, not lately anyways." I chuckled, " Not to be rude, but why're you talking to me? I mean you've never said a word to me. And wouldn't this be like social 'suicide'."
At first, she looked offended, then she laughed, " Yeah, I guess it would. Who cares." she smirked, " I'm sorry for how my friends have been treating you."
"You can't apologize for them, it's kinda crucial that they do it." I sighed.
"Christina's nice...she's just a little..." Julie stopped.
"Whore?" I finished. I looked at her, she looked offended again, then laughed.
"You know, you're funny." she said slowly, " But I have to go...Academians, you know."
"Yeah." I smirked, " Thanks."
She smiled as she got up and jogged away. I stood also, dumped my tray and wandered to the bathroom. I watched my reflection in the mirror and thought to myself. I mean, I was cute, right? I wasn't a normal guy, even if I was straight, but I am...am I weird? I mean, I was talking to myself and kinda answering. I looked away only when I heard the door open and close. I looked over to see Davis.
"Hey." I said, suddenly feeling happier.
"Hey." he said sadly.
"What's with the pucker?" I asked. He looked at me in shock, " I meant your mouth. The sadness...you know, with the sadness."
"Oh, umm, I'm okay, what about you? I saw what happened earlier." he frowned.
"It's okay, maybe I'll punch someone else and I'll feel alright." I smirked and looked at him. He was farther away than he had been, " Are you alright?"
"Whaddya mean?" he asked.
"You don't...you're kinda far away. Something you need to say?" I asked.
"I-I'm back with Christina." Davis said, finally revealing his secret, which shocked me. I didn't get the vibe that he had a secret.
"Oh." I said, again going wide-eyed.
"Before she did what she did." he said, no longer looking me in the eye.
"So, you're-cause I thought you...we..." I said, confused.
"I'm not gay like you. Last night was just...it was a fluke and I was tired." he said.
I stepped towards him, " Oh really? Cause I felt something and I think you did too. The way you're moving away from says that you're scared for some reason." I said, right in front of him.
"Stop." he said.
I bent forward and kissed him. Somehow his arms were found their way around my waist and my arms found their way around his shoulders. I felt him running his hands up the back of my shirt and suddenly he stopped.
"I can't do this." Davis said, getting to the door.
"I guess it's for the best, huh, I mean, it's not like we would have worked out. You're a complete asshole and...you should go." I said.
Davis turned to say something, but didn't, he just left. I frowned and felt that one tear fall again.
"Are you okay?" Marco said behind me. I turned to see him smiling at me, " Hey kid, you should check the stalls."
"You heard all of that?" I asked.
He nodded.
"Okay, you told me so." I said slowly.
Marco hugged me. I fully expected him to say 'told you so' or that I should go and fuck myself, but he just hugged me. That was one thing I wasn't ready for. I hugged him back and we left the bathroom together.
After the last hour of class, I found myself at my locker. I slammed the locker to see Hannah standing right there.
"I'm so sorry." Hannah said on the verge of tears.
I hugged her, " It's okay nanah. I know." I smirked.
"Oh, how touching." Christina said, again followed by Ballard and Kendall Kipton, and their group, including Davis, " Best friends back together again."
"What do you want?" I asked.
"Only your complete humiliation." Christina smirked.
"Why?" I asked.
"I got a little bored." she said, her lips curled, making her look like the Grinch.
I sighed, "Look, I've been really nice over the last few days, letting you and your 'friends' say what you wanted...that's just about over." I said.
"Oh really?" Ballard asked.
"Oh yeah. You see, I've been thinking and why should it embarrass me if I'm gay? What if I am, then why in the hell would that matter to you?! And for that fact, why would it hurt my feelings if it's true." I asked.
The stood speechless.
"I thought so." I said angrily, " You know, I think it's time for a gigantic wake-up call. No more crying. No more locker writing...got anything else to say?" I asked.
"Darn skippy!" Hannah nodded.
"Whoa, the hag speaks." Ballard chuckled.
I had enough and stood, pushing the boy's tray off the table and I stood on it, calling all attention to myself, " HEY! HEY! I just...umm...There's a lot of speculation as to whether I'm gay or whether I'm screwing someone and also some dumb thing about shrimp. I'm not going there. I just wanted to let you know that yes, I am gay. And it's okay. Some of you don't care, some of you are confused, and some of you are going to hate me, just because you don't know me. Some of you have been looking for a reason to hate me (I cast a glance at Christina), it doesn't matter. Some people are scared of themselves (I cast a glance at Davis) and it's okay. I'm not, not anymore. I've decided that I'm okay and that's all I need." I said, grabbing my bag, " Ummm, thanks." I said, climbing off the table and brushing past Davis, Ballard, Christina and their groups, Hannah at my side.