Even the Modest Must Serve By Steam Train ( steam_t2000@yahoo.com )
Chapter 3: Pleasure and Ecstasy
Leaving the courtroom was terrible. There was a huge media scrum. I was pushed and pulled and bombarded with questions as our legal team and some court officials tried to make a path for us through the thronging media. Eventually we were herded into an unoccupied office down a side corridor and directed to sit in the outer office whilst mum and the legal team went into the inner office.
Funny I had so many questions in my head I wanted answers too, but we all just sat there in deadly silence. Ed with his head bowed into his hands, Jim his eyes closed softly sobbing and me just staring at the opposite wall trying desperately to come to terms in my own mind with what had happened.
I could hear all the voices in deep conversation in the inner office but eventually when I tried to focus on what they were saying the sound was too muffled and I was none the wiser. They were in there for ages. Some times a junior legal aid would leave on some errand and return later. On one occasion a legal clerk came out of the inner office carrying a folder and stopped and looked at us. Sensing he was looking Ed raised his head and asked "Can I help you?" The clerk asked who of us was Edward Carter and who was Thomas Carter. Ed replied before I could, that he was Edward and pointing to me said "And that's Thomas".
Strangely that was it, the clerk just grunted acknowledgement and walked on out of the office, returning some 30 minutes later with the folder tucked under his arm. This time I noticed the folder had a big red state seal stamp and the words Indenture authorisation stamped in red across the front of the file. I was sure that was not there before. I presumed wrongly at that time that it was dad's paperwork.
Eventually around one o'clock the inner office door opened and I heard dads lawyer say to mum that he would see her at the estate at 3.30pm when the Federal liquidators had advised they would be arriving to take possession of all the assets He reminded mum to have the paid estate staff assembled at 3.30pm so he could finalise their employment and that the estate overseer should prepare all the slave's ready for transport to the Tallahatchie County Servitude Processing Centre by 3.30pm as well.
Our poor staff I though breaking my mind momentarily from its deep despondency about dad. They are being sold off or retrenched.
What about us was my next though?
No servants, no house, were we totally poor? Did mum have money or was it all gone?
I should have been worrying about dad and what he must have been going through at that very moment below where we stood, but suddenly I was not, I was worried about myself and the shame and humiliation of being poor.
The media had mostly left by now but there were a few photographers still outside the courthouse who tried to take our pictures and so we hurried to our Bentley, which was waiting to pick us up. The servant chauffer briefly turned around as soon as were on our way and addressing mum, said "I'm so sorry mam about Master Carter, he was a good master."
Now slaves are not supposed to speak unless they are spoken to or unless seeking direction. However how could you chastise a servant for saying that, so mum just smiled and said "Thank you Henry, I appreciate your thoughts".
After a while Ed asked mum the question I am sure we all wanted to ask. "Mum what's going to happen now?"
Mum was quite for a long while, then, she turned to Ed and said she had made special arrangements for the care of us all. Dad and her had prepared the arrangements earlier in the week and now that the trial had turned out worse than dad had planned, she had decided that as the sole parent of us three boys (dad being enslaved for life was now legally not our father and mum was instantly divorced) to put those arrangements into action.
Mum said "when the family lawyer calls this afternoon at 3.30pm he would have all the information, the good thing about what your dad and I have planned is that we will all be cared for and looked after, one way or the other. In fact in some ways we are better off with your dad being indentured than if he had only been fined"
I remember wondering immediately what "one way or the other" meant and how could dads indenturement possibly be better for us, however before I could ask, mum said "now that's enough questions, I'm in no mood to talk, I have a splitting headache and I need to think, so please for the remainder of the trip home leave me in peace".
It was about 1.45 when we pulled into the drive of `Prosperity'. There was a small media throng outside the front gate, but none came onto the property.
Mr Harris our overseer met us at the house and he accompanied mum inside. We were told by mum to go to our rooms but to assemble outside the servant's quarters by 3.25pm so we could farewell the staff and servants as the Federal liquidators took ownership.
Just as we turned to head off to our rooms, mum added, "Oh Jim, I want to see you alone at 3.10pm in the study please".
Jim asked "Why mum" but she either did not hear or choose to ignore his question and immediately said "Mr Harris in the study please we have much to organise before the liquidators arrive at 3.30pm."
As we walked to our wing of the house Jim asked "Shit what have I done guys?" We both shrugged our shoulders and said "Dunno".
Raymond was waiting in his anti room and on hearing us approach took his position outside of the room. Like our chauffer he spoke first this time
"I'm sorry about your father, masters".
He seemed genuinely upset; in fact I then noticed his eyes were red from rubbing. It amased me a slave servant would be so moved, he was after all just a slave not even a free citizen.
Ed like mum before him said "Thanks I know we all appreciate your thoughts".
None of us felt much like talking after the day's events and we all went straight off to our own rooms, so that in our own ways we could come to terms with what had befallen us.
In my case, in my room alone for the first time, the enormity of what had happened hit me. I curled up on my bed, tucked my knees up onto my chest and the tears and emotions just overflowed. I just cried and cried, called out "dad, oh dad" and let the emotions sweep over me. I was so upset that I didn't hear Raymond enter my suit or come to my bedroom door. The first I knew of his presence was when I heard him ask "Master Thomas are you all right"
"Fucking hell no I'm not and who gave you permission to speak to me or enter my room" I screamed at him.
His face showed a look of shock, then he said "Sorry Master Thomas I was only concerned for you"
I looked up at him, our eyes met and all my anger at him instantly defused. I could see in those eyes that he was genuinely concerned for me, far more so than my mother had shown.
"Oh Raymond, please forgive me" I replied
He came over to me and totally unexpectantly he hugged me.
I was speechless, Raymond had never touched me, no one touched me, not even my mother except for a slight peck of a kiss on my cheeks in the mornings some times. Dad only ever shook my hand he never hugged me. Now my servant was holding me close, I could feel his firm muscular body against mine. I could feel the comforting feelings surging from his body to mine. I had never experienced such feelings of warmth, of love. I should have reported him for touching me but I didn't want that at all, what I wanted was for him to keep hugging me; I put my arms around him and hugged him back.
As we stood there hugging my emotions surged again and the tears flowed, I sobbed and sobbed. Raymond just held me tight.
"There, there Master Thomas it will be alright. I am here to serve you sir" said Raymond.
That bought another burst of tears and sobs out of me before gaining a semblance of composure I replied "No Raymond you won't, I know the liquidators are taking all the slaves away at 3.30pm this afternoon for resale. I'm loosing you too Raymond"
I felt his body tighten, I looked up into his eyes again and could see the fear, the same look of fear I had seen earlier in my dads eyes.
"I shouldn't have told you that, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to alarm you Raymond" I said.
He just hugged me tighter, I could feel it, he could feel it, at that moment he needed me and I needed him. We weren't master and servant we were companions in need of comfort.
We edged ourselves over to my bed and we sat side-by-side, arms around each other's shoulders, holding each other tight still, saying nothing.
Eventually I said " Raymond?"
"Yes master" he replied
I'm sorry for this morning, I realise now that was so wrong of me, I treated you like a slave not a servant"
I felt a tight squeeze then Raymond said "You should not apologise Master Thomas, it is your right to correct my behaviour.
"No Raymond, you really did nothing wrong, you were worried in your own way about the trial just as we were, and it was wrong of me to expect that not to have some effect on you. I now know it was totally unreasonable for me to expect you to go on with you duties as if nothing was happening. Look at your situation now, your being sold off after spending all your life here with us. You have no say over this and that is so unfair."
It was a defining moment in my life, all my previous prejudices were thrown out, slaves were not just some lesser animal. They were human beings with feelings and emotions, I now realised this. My dad was now a slave; he deserved my compassion and love still, just as much as before he was enslaved.
I looked at Raymond and to my own amazement I confessed to him "The truth is Raymond, this morning I was glad Ed punished you because I wanted to see you naked."
I felt his hug soften, his body react to my comment, was he drawing away from me?
Quickly I added "I know that was wrong, totally wrong. This morning I could see you were embarrassed and I enjoyed your embarrassment and humiliation. I even made it worse by making you go back to your quarters naked, so all the other servants could see you naked. That was so wrong; I should suffer for doing that to you. How can I ever make that up to you before your taken away, I'm so sorry Raymond I've been so terrible to you"
`It is your right master Thomas, you did nothing wrong" Raymond replied.
"Oh yes I did and you know it. You wanted to say so this morning but your training worked, you bit your tongue, I saw you, don't deny it Raymond. What I did might be right by law but it was not right by moral decency. My father always treated all his servants with decency, I broke that trust, I'm not worthy to be your master Raymond"
As I look back on this conversation it amazes me that at 14, I could all of a sudden come to such mature views. I think dads trial had been the catalyst and unlocked a door in my mind, which once opened could not be shut ever again and has lead me to where I am today.
"Master" said Raymond, "You are now more than ever deserving of being my master. The truth is Master Thomas, up until this moment I have always resented you, with your wealth and easy life style. I had none of this, my fife was all work and service for you boys, so that you could enjoy your wealth and position. Now Master Thomas all I want is to serve you and I can't, life is so unfair to a servant."
"Raymond you can't imagine how much that last comments means to me. No one since my servant nanny has really cared for me. My parents were to busy too show me much true love and you and your predecessors always were reserved as a servant should be. To know that now all you want to do is serve me is almost overwhelming."
An hour ago there was no way I would have talked like this to anyone let alone a servant, now I was confessing and discussing my deepest emotions with Raymond.
There was a knock on my suite door and I sent Raymond to answer it. I could hear Mr Harris talking to Raymond. "There you are boy; I've been looking all over for you. Bad news boy, you need to be assembled by 3.20pm out side the servant's quarters, ready for transporting to auction. I'm afraid all the old masters assets are being sold off, along with a few of the mistresses assets as well", he chuckled at that last comment. "You'll be naked and bring nothing with you, your new masters will take care of your needs from now on. Understand?"
"Yes sir" Raymond replied.
As the door closed I heard Raymond curse "Fucking shit."
Till a few minutes ago I would have had him punished for such an outburst, now I called him back to my bed, pulled him towards me and grabbed him tight.
I'm a very modest shy boy, as I've said, but things quickly developed that all my modesty could not stop.
We hugged each other, both empty and frightened inside our souls, but as we hugged the warmth of Raymond's body next to mine, the smell of his clean well-kept body, the desire to be loved by the one person who said he really cared for me, before he left me forever, overcame all my modesty.
I reached for Raymond's tunic and pulled it over his head. I pulled down his shorts and underpants, his semi erect penis plopped into view, I slid off his sandals and began running my hands over his wonderfully smooth warm body.
Raymond didn't know what to do, I could see he wanted to do the same to me but I was a master. Realising this I did what I never thought I could do. I ignored my excessive modesty and took off my school shirt, my shoes and socks, my shorts and then with a moments pause to gather my nerve, I lowered my boxers.
Raymond smiled as his eyes surveyed what no one had seen for years. I blushed beet red. He took me into his arms and whispered into my ears, "Don't blush I think your hairless body is beautiful".
I smiled then gasped as his fingers stroked my erect penis, then ran down to my balls and fondled the smooth tight sack that lay exposed for the first time.
The feeling was unbearable, no masturbation I had ever done felt this good. The feel of naked skin on naked skin was so sensual, all my nerves felt like they were electric charged, his touch was almost unbearable. My penis was harder than I had ever felt it, all three and a half inches pointing straight out as little boy dicks do.
Raymond's penis was now also fully erect. It was of average size as I was to learn later in life, being about 5 inches when fully erect, but to me it was huge, it was also so much thicker than my little boy cock. Like wise his ball sack was hanging where as mine was still a tight little package tucked under my penis and his balls were so much larger than my poor marble sized excuses for manhood.
All my modesty was swept away as we cuddled together on my bed. Raymond kissed my neck then ran the kisses down my chest to my nipples, I squirmed, I had never realised how sensitive they were, the feel of his tongue circling around my erect nipples had me moaning with pleasure, all my concerns were lost at that moment, I existed only for now. The pleasure was intoxicating.
He kissed down my chest past my belly button till he reached my erect penis, oh the sheer pleasure, He opened his mouth and swallowed my dick. I orgasmed that very moment, the feeling was indescribable. Pleasure and ecstasy pulsated through my body, like nothing I had ever experienced. There was no cum, I was not yet capable of this and I sensed in Raymond's reaction a bit of surprise then regret, I think he wanted to have part of me in him. Some sort of lasting memento of this wonderful time together, as we strove to forget the abyss that was about to separate us in less than an hour.
Raymond showed me how to make love to his body. He gently guided me through the actions that he knew gave him great pleasure. He was a great teacher, loving and patient. He told me the servants often fucked in the servant's quarters, I was shocked and he laughed at the look on my face. "Think about it master Thomas, we live separated from the female servants, and a man needs his relief, isn't this so much better than jacking yourself off?"
"I wouldn't know about that Raymond' I replied.
He looked at me and burst out laughing "You don't think I've heard you moaning away in your rooms some afternoons after school? Why lately it's been almost every afternoon, even your brothers have stopped and smirked on occasions. Of course they are no angels either Master"
Again I just blushed beet red, my most private actions, that I thought were my deepest secret were common knowledge.
"They do it to?" I asked
"Yes master, that and a lot more, master, you didn't know master?"
"Know what Raymond?' I asked
"That first master Edward and later master James often have had me service them just as your father sometimes had me do, as I'm trained to do?"
"Serviced?"
"You mean ..." Raymond nodded; I blushed, my modesty showing again.
"Yes master" but you have never asked for it, they did.
He could see that I was genuinely shocked at this news about my brothers, my father and Raymond's own actions.
"It was my duty as their servant, master, it was not like what we just shared. With them it was my duty, they ordered me master, and with you it was much more and very different".
I didn't know what to think of the actions of my brothers or this new revelation about my father, no wonder Ed hesitated for a moment this morning before agreeing to punish Raymond, but all I wanted at that moment was for us to stay with our bodies wrapped together on my bed. I didn't want to spoil the few minutes left by talking about such things.
Soon however it was nearly 3pm, so reluctantly we had to separate.
I said to Raymond as he walked out of my bedroom and my life "I'll never forget you Raymond and if in the future I can afford it, I'll find you and buy you back Raymond, I promise".
He turned, smiled and said, "I'd like that very much master".
End Chapter 3