EPISTOLARY 2
USUAL DISCLAIMER
"EPISTOLARY" is a gay story, with some parts containing graphic scenes of sex between males. So, if in your land, religion, family, opinion and so on this is not good for you, it will be better not to read this story. But if you really want, or because YOU don't care, or because you think you really want to read it, please be my welcomed guest.
EPISTOLARY
by Andrej Koymasky © 2020
written on August 10, 1990
Translated by the Author
English text kindly revised by
George Marti
PART TWO
Roma, 8/8/86
_Dear Sebastiano,
thank you for the wonderful envelope and for the letter, whose content is also very beautiful, in fact I like very much reading what you write, because it is a way to know you better and I think that the telephone couldn't give us the possibility we have in the letters to talk about what we have in our hearts, to open ourselves to each other as friends... and also by telephone you couldn't send me those splendid envelope!.
On the morrow I will leave for Greece and I have yet to prepare my luggage; I'm really sorry you cannot come with us, I will write you again from there, at least once. These three weeks will be a sort of trial for Stefania and I because it will be the first time we will have been together night and day for such a long period and then we will see if everything between us proceeds as well as I hope, and I surely will need to open my heart to you also on this occasion.
I really would like to met and know your Carla, she must be a likeable girl, be she a living Kamasutra or not. What does she do? is she a student or does she work? If I understood correctly, she must be eighteen and I'm amazed that her parents allowed her to come with you for her holidays, because to be alone with you is not what one can expect from a Southerner girl but more especially, from her family.
You are lucky having brothers and sisters and I say that because I'm an only child and I swear that I would like to have somebody to... make dirty my work with milk! Living alone of course has several advantages, but also not a few disadvantages, I can assure you. If I were still living in Bologna I would be living with my family and not just to have my food ready and my shirts ironed, but mainly because it is so good to have someone at home waiting for you, someone with whom to talk, or with whom possibly to quarrel.
It's a pity that you are so far away, because if you were here in Rome, I would certainly feel less lonely; here I do have Stefania, that's true, but with you a special communication channel has opened, such that in two years I never could have with her. At times I feel as if Stefania and I were on two different wave lengths, you know, or like the chats between two deaf people in the situation comedies, and it is just in bed that our two wave lengths seem to coincide for a while, but then it is only sufficient to rise from the bed that it again changes... and you understand that it is not possible to remain all the time... horizontal, right?
Moreover, I must confess to you that even in bed Stefy has very little fantasy and I think that my grandmother would have acted in the same classic way that is she under and I on top of her. But at least she loves it, she does it willingly and that's good, and often it is she who starts and all things considered, the intercourse is agreeable even if she certainly is not a living Kamasutra and neither just a summary. In return she never forgets to take her pill and always reminds me use a condom, because her password is "prudence" and that not just in bed but for any of her decisions or activities. At times, as a little joke and to pull her leg, I call her Prudenziana, or Prue, and she smiles quite as if she took it as a compliment.
Anyway tomorrow we well start our trip and as it is said "survivors will tell" in fact it is possible that being far from home and together all day long, she will relax a little and who knows, we can make love more often and a little more... disorderly!
I bought an album expressly to collect your envelopes; I will never sell them even if you become incredibly famous and even if they offered me millions; I carefully put them in the album in the order I get them so that they are not stained. The last one is really wonderful, but all of them are so, and it would be difficult to make an ordered list and anyway I'm yet looking forward to your next one with a sense of pleasure, and then for the next one, and the one after next and so on. In my album there is place for forty envelopes, but don't worry, when it is full I will buy another one.
Yesterday I was thinking about your idea of our making some animations together and after the holidays, the first time we meet, we can talk about it, because this idea is fascinating to me and moreover, if you decide to stop at my place, we will have lots of time to talk about it and to lay down a program, some ideas and a working schedule, do you agree?
Oh, would I have loved to have you two in Greece wit us, but I have to be patient and anyway we will have other occasions to do holidays together, I presume.
For the moment receive my best wishes for your holidays and also for your mother health, my dear Sebastiano.
Ciao
_
Federico
*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***
Saturday the 16th of August
from Auronzo di Cadore
Federico,
here all is wonderful. So different from the South. You feel ok. Both for the air and for beauty.
Amazed for Carla? But her parents don't let her come with me. Can you think! She come here with her cousin. They have a twin bedroom. I'm here with Toni, the cousin's boy friend. We have a twin bedroom also. Same hotel. And here we swapped. Down there nobody knows about it. Officially Toni and I are even not here. We are in Sicily. Camping in the woods. In fact our families know each other. Just Francesco knows the truth. Not even Cettina. But he will keep the secret. He understands me. He too has had same problems.
With Carla it's ok. I think about you and Stefy. Hope you two are ok. Here climate is perfect. Not too hot. Splendid panorama. Many tourists, but not too much. This envelope is inspired by Dolomites. Not to the tourists.
Mum seems to recover. Doctors have hopes. We all hope. Thank for your wishes.
Here in the hotel there is a Viking. The way she looks at me, she likes me. I too like her. But with Carla here, taboo! A pity. I'd like to give a try. They say they are so available. Especially with Latin males. And I'm a male. And also Latin. She's lean, tall, blond. Classic Northerner. Opposite of Carla. Well Carla too is lean. But not tall and she's dark. And she's always glued to me.
Would I be a faithful husband? Probably yes. But now I'm not married. I ask myself: is there any difference? It's enough of a rite to change things? Who knows.
But I'd like to go with that Viking. I'm not reliable, right? What would you do in my place? I think you too are not so reliable. We are alike. I think you'd like the Viking. But then, she can be an iceberg. Sexual fantasies. Desire of new. Day dreams.
How's Greece? How are Greek girls? Filling your eyes? When back there'll be your letter. For sure. I count on that. Your letters are so good. I do fine envelopes. You fine letters.
I go to bed. Carla calls me.
Ciao. Take care. Your friend
Sebastiano
P.S. I've found a music you'll like. I bought for you the record. They didn't have it on tape.
*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***
Karyai, 18/8/86
_Dear Sebastiano,
from our camper window I can see Mount Athos we will go to visit tomorrow or rather I will go, because as you probably know, Mount Athos is a kind of small theocratic republic where females are not admitted, even female animals, just think of that, and therefore Stefy will probably do an excursion to sea with a group of American girls we met here in the camp ground.
With Stefy its going not bad, not good even if I hoped that these days would have allowed me to better understand my relationship with her, to make it clear so that I could be able to conclude in one way or another, that is, that I continue, or there is no sense and I break, and on the contrary all is exactly as always, no more, no less, and I'm disappointed, I'm disappointed in myself, I mean, because I cannot arrive at a decision.
Stefania... she is always the same, she can be foretold, she is immutable, warm-tepid in bed, cold-tepid out of the bed and her mood varies from serious-cheerful to cheerful-serious and her remarks, conversation with her at times is clever-worldly, a times clever-committed, never really futile, never really too profound, because she is a girl so very balanced, perfect, right that you cannot even be bored with her, you cannot be dissatisfied with her, honestly, but neither happy, and moreover she is neither the "aurea mediocritas" because Stefy is certainly not mediocre, on the contrary she is rather exceptional, I have to honestly admit it, but neither is she gold...
But now enough with those thoughts.
Greece is really a wonderful land, pastoral and perhaps it is just my mythological fantasies but I see it yet populated by gods and nymphs and fauns and heroes and it is beautiful, not just the Acropolis with the Parthenon and the Propilees and so on, but they are the only beautiful things to be seen in Athens; for the rest it is a tasteless city, but also the mountains, small villages, the small harbours at sea, the myriad of small islands and rocks, everything. I believe that if you were here, I could have enjoyed all that even more, that land of myths and poetry.
Do you know that still you can see boy shepherds sitting on a rock, while their flock browses all around, and they play reed whistles or syrinx? They still really exist! When I saw one of them, I stopped the camper and went down to look at him and I would have remained there to look at him, still, in a religious silence to enjoy the scene for hours, in mystical contemplation... but Stefy called me back to reality after exactly five minutes with two calibrated clacks of horns and so the little shepherd stopped playing his instrument, raised an arm to wave me hallo from afar, then resumed playing while we were going away with our camper.
Delphi and the Parnassus have disappointed Stefania, but not me. Do you believe that the sacrum of a place could be breathed with the air? This is what I felt because notwithstanding all, in that place the Oracle was just waiting to be waked up from the oblivion of centuries, amongst those sacred woods... But I presume that Stefy was hoping to see some important and majestic monument, that doesn't exist any more, and not just a forest, and so she was disappointed.
And then the sea! In several points you would not be surprised to see Venus coming out, all naked on her rosy mother of pearl and luminous shell, pulled by cohorts of golden-green sea horses. Even if my own Venus seems to be more at ease if she can surf the waves on board a chromium plated speedboat and she will be, to say the most, topless!
Sacred and profane, poetry and prose and I standing there in the middle and feeling like somebody having his feet in two stirrups, but not on the same horse...
How are you doing? How are the Dolomites? Do you know that I have not yet been there? Now that you have seen them, do you advise me to go and visit? Are you drawing there also, or are you rather taking a real rest? Did you write to me, you too?
When I'm back in Rome I hope to find one of your multi coloured and full of poetry envelopes. I shot a lot of slides and I will show them to you as soon as you come to Rome.
Well, ciao for the moment, my dear friend, and receive a warm greeting
_
Federico
*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***
Monday, 25th of August
from Salerno
Back home, there was your letter.
I told you about Vikings. You about Venuses. You win in poetry. I'm too carnal.
Yes, Dolomites are beautiful. But there are no gods. Yes, I believe you can breath the sacrum. I'm sure. It happens to me, at times. I'm curious about the monks' republic. And the boy shepherd. Did you take pictures? First days of September I'll be in Rome. At your place, if it's ok. You'll show me all. You'll tell me all. I will have little to tell. But I did drawings. I'll bring them with me. To show you.
Tony was a pain in the ass. Happily there was Lucia. You know, Carla's cousin. She neutralized him. He is the classic Southerner male. Full of himself. But to judge is too easy. And quite always wrong. Probably he is just not self confident. Anyway he got the Viking. At least so he says. And he says she was a bomb!
I hope you'll like the record I bought..
Happily I wrote you from the Dolomites. So you'll not be disappointed. I'm a little lazy to write. You're the first I write so much. But with you comes out easy. I know you understand me. You feel like me.
When you're back, probably you'll find this also. Here it is so hot. It's night and I'm almost naked. I wear just my shorts. Mum and Cettina are not at home, so... Later I'll paint you an envelope. Tomorrow I'll post.
I found mum better. She's doing cobalt therapy. Francesco is still in holiday. Also Ruggiero is in the country at our grandparents place. Cettina is at the hospital near mum. So I'm alone. It's rare to be alone, in here. It's beautiful, I assure you.
Who's alone wants company. Who has always company wants to be alone. Funny, no? Blonds want to be dark, and dark to be blond. Who has curly hair wants straight hair, and the straights to be curly. Why is no one happy? But I'm happy. All things considered, I am. And not just a little. I like to be dark, curly, to have brothers and sisters.
I have many defects, that's true. But I like myself. Do you think that wrong? I don't think so. If you like yourself, then you can also like others. If not, you cant. As I like what I do. Without exaggeration.
Well, ciao Federico. Take care
Sebastiano
*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***
Roma, 1/9/86
_Dear Sebastiano,
Two letters at once, what a luxury, and you cannot imagine my happiness and my desire to open them and to read them immediately, but not to ruin the envelopes I had to wait until I was in my apartment to be able to use a paper cutter. The envelopes are one more beautiful than the other and that is not a surprise, and with those two I am at seven.
Yes dear Sebastiano, I too think that we two do fairly resemble as character, even if I'm perhaps a little more talkative than you, but we both are crazy, or rather not so serious, as you say. But you are more self confident of what I am, more squared, possibly less problematic, but anyway we resemble and that's probably the reason why we did match immediately and this beautiful and precious friendship is born.
Certainly, if you were in Greece with me, instead of Stefania, I would have appreciated and enjoyed the trip a lot more because I think, or rather I'm sure, that you would have been in ecstasy for the same things that fascinated me and that you would have savoured them as I tried to do notwithstanding the indifference of my ineffable Stefy.
You say you like yourself and I don't think this is wrong at all, on the contrary I would like to like myself the same way, as you do for yourself, but you have all the reasons to be happy with yourself, I on the contrary don't have all those reasons, or perhaps I too have good points I think I'm a little happy with how I am, but not completely because there are things in me I would like to change, things I would like to be different, not so much for the physical aspect, but inside me, on the character level. I think it is important to be able to take one's own life in his hands, his own way to be or to react to facts, to think, in order to try to become better, and I feel I'm not doing that enough.
I hope you can call me soon at work to tell me the days you will be in Rome, and of course not only there is no problem you staying at my place for those days, but I will be very, very pleased to be again with you.
Do you like to cook? I love doing it and if you want I will prepare for you some of my special dishes and personal recipes, so if there is something you don't like or you cannot eat, please tell me beforehand, so that I can plan your treats.
Good, for now ciao and see you soon. Big greetings
_
your Federico
*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***
Saturday, the 20th of September
from Salerno
Federico,
Before all, thanks. For the splendid welcome. For the tasty recipes. For all the time spent with me.
They have been splendid days. For real. But you have to make a promise. If you want me again at your place. In all those days you never was alone with Stefy. But I know that at times she spent the night with you. So, if you want to be with her, just tell me. I can go to dance. Or to a night club. Or to spend one night in a hotel. And be back home when right for you. You do have right to your intimacy. "Clear pacts, long friendship" as we say.
But it has been fine to chat until falling asleep. Normally I was the first to go, no? And I hope I didn't kick all the night. Your bed is wide like a soccer field! But I'm used to sleeping alone. In a small single bed. Really small.
I would like to have so big a bed. You can sleep in any direction. And when making love, you can roll and rock as you please. Could I have such a bed with Carla! We will do a corrida. She the torero and I the bull. Or vice versa?
Splendid your Greece slides. My eyes are still full of them. And wonderful your commentary. My heart is still full of it. You are a poet, a real poet. I would have recorded your words...
About the new work proposed by your producer. Don't deny it, there is your hand under it. I thought about it, and I'm sure. Anyway, thanks. I like it very much. Moreover that way we can continue to work together. For months. This also, I like very much.
I'm looking at your present. The one you brought me from Greece. Thank you again. I didn't bring you anything. It will be for the next time.
And then, thanks for the coffees. I was never waked up with a good coffee. It's really good. Quite a luxury. I felt like a pasha. You did spoil me in those days. I like to be spoiled. A little, at least.
I'll start immediately to work on our project. I think we can do something worthwhile. You're a volcano of ideas. One better and more exciting than the other.
Ciao, Federico. Be well and take care
Sebastiano
*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***
Roma, 2/10/86
_Dear Sebastiano,
Before all, it is not true you didn't bring me back anything from your journey, in fact do you forget the record with the percussions music? I continue to hear it and to hear it again and the more I hear it the more I like it, in fact that "arrhythmic rhythm" makes something vibrate inside me, something ancestral and primordial and it is really, really beautiful.
Then, second point, you don't have to worry about me and Stefy, because it is not that we fuck every night, and neither every other night, so there is absolutely no problem about your presence and if by chance sometimes you will have to stay at my place longer than usual, let's say more than two weeks, and I want to be alone with her one night, I will tell you without ceremonies nor problems. Is it ok, that way?
I too loved chatting with you in the evenings until falling asleep, even if it is true that you were almost always the first to glide into sleep, and anyway you never did kick during the night. I told you so, why didn't you believe me? Between us no formalities, right? So if you did kick me or even if you did start to snore, I would have said that to you immediately without any problem. Therefore there is no sense in you going back to sleep in the living room couch like in the first days, because the couch is narrow and uncomfortable and I would feel bat to sleep comfortably and not you. As you said, my bed is wide as a soccer field, so there is enough place for two and even more.
I too started to work on our project for the animation and I like that project so much that ideas are gushing out like an avalanche and I'm filling page after page so that the first time we are together again we can make a choice, between the many ideas, the ones we feel to be better. Anyway I think that I would like to call the dog Rodolfo and if you like this name and if it gives you inspiration, try to draw a dog fitting this name. For him, on the contrary, no good names did yet come out, but for sure with the developing of our project the right name for him will come out.
About your new work, I repeat that no, there is absolutely not my hand in it, but it is our big boss that is so pleased with your actual work that he personally decided to entrust you this new project and I didn't know about his decision, even if of course I'm really happy for that decision that I approve completely. But it is not my merit, it is only and exclusively your merit, hard head!
I feel Monica does have a crush on you, in fact she continues to ask me about you, to send you her greetings, to talk about you saying how very cheerful you are and likeable, and handsome, and sexy and so on, and so on. Anyway I send you her greetings, so I did what I was requested and did my duty. She also asked me if you are engaged and I answered that I didn't know, but if she asks me again what do I have to answer? Would you like me saying yes or no? Let me know, please.
Ciao, steal hearts! A dear greeting from me and from all
_
Federico
*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***
lunedì Sunday, 12th of October
from Salerno
Federico,
Steal hearts, I? I did nothing!
Anyway tell Monica I'm not engaged. You never know. All considered could be nice. Provided that Carla doesn't know. She will break my legs. She is so possessive!
I'm glad you like the record. Yes, to me too it has the same effect. Awakens the primitive we have in us. The instinctive man. Who is also the more sincere, the more wise. The more "really man". To me, that kind of music, inspire dancing. All naked in the nature. It's not so for you?
Rodolfo is a good name for our dog. It inspires me. He, instead, why don't we call him Theo? With the "h". I feel him that way, I see him really theous. Or theist. Or theic... Do you like it? If you don't like it we can think to another name...
About you and Stefania. You don't fuck every day because she doesn't want? Or it's you? I would like to fuck every day, instead. It's natural, I think, at our age. And you are just 5 years older than me. You cannot do it with a time table or a calendar. I wouldn't say really every day. But neither once in two weeks. You have to do it more often. That's why I was worried.
I don't want to be nosey about your sex life. You can tell me that those are your matters. And you'll be right. But just a little bit right. As a friend, in fact, I'm worried. Nothing is better than sex. Especially if it is not just a physical thing. Especially if there is love. Or at least affection.
Are you or aren't you a youth? Wake up, friend!
Well, now forgive me. I said even too much.
Next month Francesco will marry. At last they found an apartment. So here there will be a little more space. In our room will remain just me and Ruggiero. Loredana, my soon to be sister in law, is an expansive girl. Even her dimensions. She has boobs and an ass that are two monuments. Francesco always appreciates this kind of abundance. Not I, on the contrary. I will feel lost. Carla is even more lean than your Stefy. Even for that I like her.
The other day I found in Naples a fantastic shop. They have everything for fine art. Really everything. I bought two sets of Japanese felt pens. 96 nuances of colours and 48 of greys. A dream. With the veiling technique you can obtain a lot more nuances, quite infinite. I've used them for the envelope of this letter. Wonderful colours, aren't they? Possibly in Rome I can find even better sets.
I enclose some sketches for our animation. Tell me what solution do you like more. Without compliments. If none appeal to you, just tell me.
Can you send me one of your recipes? That one of the chou entree. I told Cettina and she wants to try. If it is not your secret, of course.
Here in the country with my grand parents I feel good. I think you would like it here. Who knows that one day I'll bring you here. Possibly a week end you are free. We can do it, no?
Ciao, handsome. Take care and write soon
your Sebastiano
*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***
CONTINUES IN PART 3
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