The following is a complete work of fiction.
Any resemblance between the characters and any real life person is completely coincidental. Please do not copy or distribute the story without the author's permission.
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The following story contains erotic homosexual situations. If it is illegal for you to read this please leave now.
Chapter 16 Loss
"Open a signal Chris."
"Khore is detained at the moment. I am Captain Bransen. Anything you would say to him, you may say to me now." Each time I heard Khore's name cross someone's lips it ate at my heart. I worried about him and our unborn child. Still we were in deep shit, now more than ever.
"Ahhh I see." Trax answered gravely giving a small nod. "He was the one caught in the telepathic web then I presume. We are able to see the net of it now with our sensors. It seems to center on your ship. Obviously... we did not share this information."
The team turned with questions on their faces waiting for an explanation. I hadn't told them and apparently the gossip had, for once, not traveled at near blinding speed throughout the ship.
"Yes, that seems to be the situation. We are unsure how to free him. Khore and my unborn child lie frozen in our Med bay. That isn't our biggest problem however. The Kotan are coming to devour this world and I imagine us along with it unless we run. That part of Khore that is Kelay mentioned that you might be helpful in putting an end to this conflict between the Thorens and Humans. I hoped it wouldn't have taken this much death. It has left us with too few to fight."
Trax considered my words before answering. "For many millennia we have been subject to Keelon's insanity. We owe you our gratitude for this new freedom. We also have a great debt to pay for the atrocities to your race." The fatigue etched across his face as much as his sympathy.
"Keelon greatly exaggerated our advancements toward our own longevity. You still provide our best chance at regaining our immortality. I speak for the Thoren people when I say we will abide by your decision, even if it means the extinction of both our races." Trax paused to take a short breath and shifted his weight. It was strange to see the simplest movement be a thing of grace.
"If we could share the data you have compiled regarding the Kotan with our own long range scans, we may yet find a solution. Would this be acceptable?" Trax asked.
I searched the eyes of our team. Each reflected the stubborn determination and loyalty I loved in them. After a unanimous nod of agreement I gave my answer.
"We have approximately two days before the Kotan arrive. We will share our data and continue scans until the last moment. I cannot condemn two races for the sake of this planet or my love. If we do not find a viable solution in that time, then I will remain here with the Cystos. If that happens, you and the occupants of this ship are to flee.
"TK, establish a scientific data link with the remaining Thoren fleet. Coordinate data and possible options." Trax's words seemed genuine, but I wouldn't let my guard down completely. There was too much history to give them access to all data.
"Understood." Trax gave a nod and the image before us dissipated like a warm breath on a cold winter day.
"We won't leave you Bransen." Doc insisted.
"You will do as your told!" I said too harshly.
"TK, Take me to Khore." I thought the command.
My surroundings flashed and changed to the scenery of the room where Khore lay. My hopes were destroyed along with the many Sphere Major that fell in their personal struggle over command of their people.
I sat on the bed that TK had created for me across from Khore. The same doubts that threatened my sanity when my own son had lay in such a bed haunted me. His body dead to the world and me with fleeting hope beyond hope he would come back to me. He didn't though. First it had been my lover, and then my son. A parent isn't supposed to watch their child pass before them. It's against the natural order of things. I had been against the order of things for so very long. Over 1700 years had passed with me as a pivot point watching life wither and decay and then renew itself.
I suppose I had clung to the fantasy that one day Kelay and I would whisk away to live out eternity in each others arms. I did love him, but I know now that I loved the possibility of a forever that, for once, would not end. Suddenly eternity seemed like a possible blessing instead of a curse. Now Kelay was gone too. The part of him that remains is Khore. Khore's smile captured my love as much as his strength. There is an empathy and anguish in him that rivals my own in understanding. And now, yet again, I had been misled by fate, cruel bitch that it is. I've seen the bitterness fate has spawned over time. Until now, I don't think I had ever felt it cut so deep.
Anger boiled through me as did the hollow ache within my chest. I took a deep breath remembering Khore's words. "It is what it is. Accept it and move on." The soldier in me was beginning to rage against Khore's words. I may have to accept the situation, but I didn't have to let it roll over me. I am going to fight! With somewhat renewed purpose I felt the rush of adrenalin quickly leaving my body. It was late, and in truth I was mentally exhausted. Hell... it had been a busy day.
I stared at Khore trying to engrave every line and curve of his face onto my mind. I lay back on the bed finally, closed my eyes and tried to calm myself. The whiplash of events in the last few weeks had taking its toll. I was tired, and let sleep take me.
I dreamt...
I felt the sun warming my skin as I lay nude in a field of grass and wild flowers most would consider weeds. I was barely able to peer over the endless field of thigh high grasses. The smell of something earthy and sweet was in the air and hinted at long forgotten memories. Insects dotted the horizon in chaotic patterns over the foxtail, thistle and pink clover. The hills in the distance seemed to sway like the waves of the ocean stretching their green and gold colors to the sky. There was a rushing hiss as the breeze tussled the leaves of a nearby copse of trees. They were large ancient oaks that seemed to be waving back at me as their leaves flickered green and grey. It was a perfect place and I knew it wasn't real.
I caught another taste of the sweet scent as the wind washed over my skin. It was honeysuckle. I couldn't remember the last time I had smelled its sweetness. I had forgotten such things existed. I don't suppose there was a place for this in my world. The faster life seemed to move, the more simple pleasures necessity disposed of. I would be lying if I said that there wasn't enough time. It's strange how duty, commitments, and responsibilities seem to push aside the things that truly matter. It only takes a second to stop and look at the beauty around us.
This was a good dream. The horrors of most nights didn't invade my thoughts and I let regret leave me. I was going to keep this moment even if for only a little while. The blue sky was dusted with small bits of white that let you know how far away they truly were. I felt something to my side and turned to see Khore standing with the sun behind him highlighting the edges of his dark brown hair. He was nude and the contrast of light crawled across the curve of his chest, hips and thighs almost hiding his expression. He was smiling and he was beautiful.
"Khore?"
"Yes Bransen, I'm here." He answered as he knelt beside me in the den of bent grasses my body had made. It felt so real.
"I know I'm dreaming."
"Yes and no." Khore answered as he lay down beside me, placing his head on my chest.
I could feel the weight of him against me and the tickle of wind blown hair across my skin. I could smell the faint musk that was Khore. It reminded me how he slept wrapped in my arms. Sometimes at night when I breathed deeply I would catch a hint of it from his hair or neck. I held him close watching his head rise and fall with my breath. It was more than comfortable... It was perfect and safe.
"I want you to think of this place and remember me." Khore whispered.
"Always." I answered.
An eternity seemed to pass too quickly as Khore stretched against my body. I tilted my head to meet his gentle lips in a fleeting kiss before parting.
"The Kotan are crystalline creatures and too many to blast from the sky. Weapons might not have any affect on them at all or even feed them. You may be able to shatter them with sound. There is some small hope in that. Khore was tracing his fingertips through my hair and along my temple.
"I love you Khore." I spoke too quickly. I didn't want it left unsaid.
"I love you Bransen. Raise our son well."
My eyes shot open as I sprang up in bed. My heart felt as if someone had crushed it.
"TK, Status on Khore!" I yelled. I felt like I was losing my breath as my heart threatened to explode within my chest.
"Status unchanged." TK replied.
It had sounded too much like goodbye. I was half afraid to look at him but I had to. He was still dusted with a shimmer of frost seeming more statue than person. He had said to take care of our son. Not our 'sons' and the realization crept up my spine like ice.
I hopped off of the bed trying to escape the suffocating cold. It crept across my flesh leaving goose bumps in its wake. I was angry and terrified. The fury was taking hold.
I began pacing the eight foot path between our beds.
"There is NO WAY IN HELL you're going to lay there and tell me that this space bug has beat you!" I yelled feeling tears form at the corners of my eyes. Even this small weakness fueled my frustration as I wiped them away violently.
"Fuck tears, fuck the Kotan, and FUCK YOU KHORE if you let them take you and our child from me!" I screamed the words regretting them as fast as they left my lips. My whole body trembled out of control.
I glimpsed a blue flash in the mirror as I paced in my rage before finally pausing to see it was me. Khore's eyes shown back at me, but they were my own. It was a cruel memory that brought a guttural cry from my throat.
The arch opened to the room as Doc rushed in.
"What is.." was all Doc got out before my mental blast sent him flying into the far wall with a crash.
"DON'T TOUCH ME!" I screamed.
"DOC!" Chris yelled racing past me. Blood trickled from Doc's brow as Chris huddled against him.
"Doc. " I stopped as he flinched away from me.
I felt my anger melting away. I had never so much as raised a fist to him and now he cowered.
"I.. I'm sorry." This would be another of too many regrets.
"TK, Command Level 1" I projected the command.
A white flash moved me to the center of the command station. I slumped in my chair catching my breath. I attempted to gather the shattered remnants of my sanity. This was serving no purpose and I had other responsibilities. The safety of my team and the people on this ship diverted my attention. I welcomed the distraction.
"Incoming transmission from Trax." TK announced.
"Go ahead." I answered straining my sleep pressed clothing.
"Captain, "
"Please call me Bransen." I interrupted.
"Excuse me, Bransen.." Trax paused. "We just monitored an energy spike from your location. Is everything alright?"
His voice was filled with genuine concern and it caused the guilt to press heavily on my heart.
"Yes. Everything is fine. We dropped our cloak hours ago. I didn't know such things were of consequence." I lied.
"I see." Trax answered.
I suppose my lies were better served elsewhere. The emotional pain was raw and open and I'm sure read like a book in my expression. I don't think I had ever felt so out of control in my life.
"I want you to investigate the possibility of using a high frequency resonance burst to shatter the Kotan life forms. Khore.." I choked on his name. "Khore believes that this may be the means to defeating them."
"Interesting... We will look into this. Without something more substantial to test with, we will not know the appropriate frequency or even if this is a viable possibility. Don't give up hope just yet Bransen. We still have time." The image faded.
"COM: Shipwide I want all personnel to run drills on emergency escape procedures until further notice." I announced.
I thought my next command. "TK, Transport me to the ocean side where Khore and I were our first day aboard ship please."
A bright flash brought me to the beach as I felt my feet sink into the hot sand. I sat down as I rested my head against my knees wrapping my arms around my legs. I closed my eyes and let the roar of the ocean breaking against the sand lull me away from my worries. The distant call of gulls and other birds pierced the roar as they fought over the latest catch.
I sat there for hours doing nothing but concentrating on the roar of the ocean. I felt so helpless and time was running out. I felt him beside me, though I didn't know for sure who had tracked me down. Whoever it was; was not welcome, but I didn't have it in me to care anymore.
"Hey there guy." Came the quiet voice. It was Rift. Rift didn't speak unless it was important and I think that fact worried me more than anything.
"Hey." I mumbled back not bothering to look up.
I heard his body hit the sand with a dull thump as he landed beside me.
"Rough day I hear." He said quietly.
"Yeah..." I sighed. "How's Doc?" I didn't really want the answer. It shamed me to think what I had done.
"He's fine... worried about you though." Rift answered.
"It's killing him Rift." My breath caught in my throat as I fought against my sorrow. "They're killing Khore and my unborn son."
We sat in silence for some time feeling the spray of water as the mists gathered against our skin. The cold damp made me shiver.
"I'm jealous." Rift said quietly.
This I hadn't expected to hear as I lifted my head from the cradle of my knees.
"You're jealous? You've had so much time with Twist... how could you possibly be jealous?" I asked.
"It takes a special love to cause that much pain Bransen. Don't misunderstand. I love Twist very much. But I have never been so wounded as the pain I see in your eyes. It's a double edged knife Bransen. You cannot have the good without the bad. Without the depths of sorrow, how could you compare the joy? One is nothing without the other. I envy you that joy." Rift paused.
"When I was a very young child, I remember going through the fields to pick flowers for my pouch father. I had spent hours picking just the right ones to make the most beautiful bouquet for him. I made sure the flowers were just so, and that every petal was in place. The colors were divided and all was perfect. I brought them home to him and he placed them in a container of water so that they might last longer."
Rift continued after a deep breath. "The next day as I climbed from my bed I walked into the room that held the container of the beautiful flowers for my father. It had been late fall then. They had all died. They had wilted and sagged and browned from the cold harsh night. I remember crying and crying. They were gone and I had worked so hard to make something special for my father. I felt so cheated."
"He came rushing into the room that brisk morning to see why I was wailing away and laughed at my tears as he hugged me tight. As he brushed away my tears he told me a secret. We took the flowers and buried them outside our door. The next summer we had living a bouquet just outside." Rift smiled as he spoke.
"We all build our own gardens Khore..." He finished, pressing against my shoulder getting up from the sand.
"Trim back the dead so new growth might flourish." He smiled and a flash of light stole him away.
"What the hell do you trim back when the roots have rotted?" I yelled to no one in particular.
"You plant the leaf." TK answered.
Well, I suppose I could grapple with my fate like an ant under the looking glass, or I could emerge like the butterfly before having its wings ripped off. You have to love the possibilities. In the past I had always expected little and got less. Goddamnit.... This time... I wanted it all.
"COM: Trax.. Status on the resonance burst for the Kotan." I asked.
"It has merit Bransen. We can't say for sure what, if any, affect it will have on Khore. He could be released, or destroyed along with them, IF, it happens to work. There are too many variables." Trax answered. "Kotan ETA is in nine hours. They laid waste to the last planet. Even if we succeed, the debris in our orbit will likely rip this planet to ribbons. You've got work to do."
"Trax... if it comes to that, I want you to take your people and go. Take as many as you can. You said you'd follow my decision. I expect you to keep your word." I replied.
"Sometimes the good guys win Bransen." Trax said with a smile.
"Not in my world. Not for the last 1700 years" I snapped watching him blanch at my reply..
It was now nearly 2200 hours.. In eight hours they would swarm our world. I was prepared for my oblivion. They would be here at 0600 hours.
"TK, Take me to Khore's Room." I commanded.
The flash of light moved me morphing the background into my new surroundings. TK might be a smartass, but he was also efficient.
"Thank you TK." I answered. It seemed odd thanking a computer, but he had become a member of the team as much as anyone.
"You're welcome Bransen." TK answered me almost immediately.
I pressed my lips against his biting cold skin before I left. This wasn't our final goodbye.
"COM:Shipwide. All personnel will board escape pods at 0500 hours. All those not in compliance will be executed." I ended the transmission.
"TK, transport me to Command Level 1." I asked slower than it happened.
One by one the team members emerged within the command area taking their posts. I noticed the dark red of Doc's stitches and glanced away in my embarrassment. I had lost control.
"I'm sorry Doc." I said before the team.
"It was never a problem Bransen. How are you doing?" Doc asked.
I suppose the sadness in my eyes answered his question because he didn't pursue the silence
"I'm Okay Doc." I answered finally seeing a smile cross his face.
This was my family. It was my job to protect them, and I would, whether they liked it or not.
We sat looking at the view screen for the next few hours before the first remnants of our doom encroached upon the world. Like a plague of locust they filled the sky and darkened our world.
The Sphere Major with the Cystos had positioned us to emit the high frequency burst.
I watched as the sharp black talons of these things plunged into Sphere Major, the Cystos and the Earth. They were a blanket of destruction that literally blocked out the sun as dawn had come and passed without recognition.
We initiated the high frequency harmonic pulse, but it didn't destroy them all. It had actually taken only a small fraction of the swarm that tore across us and this world. We increased the intensity of the pulse destroying some of the larger crystals before they began to converge in the Earth below.
They had reacted instinctively. They merged creating a greater crystal growing in strength and size exponentially. We simply didn't have the power to destroy them and now they were bleeding the energy from the atmosphere itself.
We began the use of conventional weapons against the darkness of the crystal only to watch it grow as if we had force fed it. We simply couldn't harm it. We had lost. Our time was done.
"TK. Take me to Khore." I commanded.
The familiar flash pulled me to his room as I stared as him. Too many days were spent without him and now there would be no more. Explosions and power outages rocked the ship as our doom approached.
It hadn't been so much the attack they used, but the cold that had frozen our liquid metal exteriors. We were like fragile glass at a bb gun contest and all we could do was sit there.
In my final moments I decided on the company of Khore. How could I choose anything else. I remembered the field of green and gold. It hadn't been a difficult decision. There was no one else I'd rather be with. He held my heart. What do you do when that happens?
The power drain was collapsing the ship layer by layer threatening to hit the core and the 5th dimensional material. I didn't honestly care much any more. Yes.... This would probably fix our problem... but... it would unfortunately kill us too. So... not a good thing.
I sat staring at Khore as the world around us crumbled. I noticed the frost begin to melt against his nose. He was losing the frost.
"TK... Status on Khore!" I yelled hopefully.
"I'm sorry Bransen... Khore is gone." Came my reply.
The words echoed through my mind like a thousand explosions. Then I settled. I lay my head against the cool flesh of his chest. A calm overcame me. I didn't fear it anymore. We were moving on and I didn't worry so much anymore. There was unfinished business... there were regrets, but... this did promise me Khore. It was all I ever wanted to start with.
I suppose I learned to cherish the simple things after all.
Before I get a flash flood of evil email. Please wait for the next chapter... Maybe it's not so bad... Maybe it is. Khore is dead. I suppose you'll have to read the next chapter to find out. I hope the best for you and yours and hope to read your messages soon. You know the nature of my writing, so maybe I hope this is not a surprise for you. I busted my ass on this chapter so I really hope it is worth your time. I hope it sucks you in and tears up your soul. (I could only hope...)
Take care.