Dying Eyes

By Gus Vardas

Published on Nov 28, 2000

Gay

Author's Note: I know this is a bit early for Christmas......but....I'm kind of in the spirit already ha ha ha.

Disclaimer: The following story in no way implies that I truely know the sexual orientation of either of the REAL Backstreet Boys. I don't know them personally, nor do I know anything concrete about them. This story is STIRCTLY fictional.

Dying Eyes Prelude

As I pulled out of my driveway...I couldn' help but look up at my beautiful new house. I had just recently moved out of my parents house into one of my own.

I smiled and sped off.

I drove rather quickly towards my parents house. Why? Becuse it's Christmas. I really didn't want to be late. Especially seeing as my whole family would be there. Some of which didn't live here in Canada. So I guess you could say I was really excited.

As I pulled on to the street my parents lived on, I noticed all the cars around my parents house. I drove up slowly and read each license plate one by one.

'Uncle Jay from Michigan.' I chuckled looking at my uncles 2001 Dodge Durango.

'Oooooo. My cousin Jamie is down from Orlando!' I began to get more and more excited.

I looked at a few other cars before parking in my parents driveway. As soon as I parked, I saw the front door fly open. Two younger kids came running out.

I stepped out of my car and walked passed the two children without paying attention to them.

"Uncle David!!!!!!!!" the little girl screamed out.

I continued to walk.

"Hello?! Uncle David?" the little boy said with a hint of sarcasm.

I still, continued to walk.

"Fine. Jessie, let's go sit in Uncle David's car. He got a new stereo we can play with!" the little boy giggled.

I stopped, and turned around. I looked at both the little kids....and started laughing.

They both ran up to me and I picked them both up and hugged and kissed them.

"How are you 2 brats doing?" I asked giggling. They were my sisters kids. My niece and nephew. Jessie is 6 and Derrik is 9.

"Uncle David what did you bring me?!?!" Jessie yelled.

"Nothing brat. Cause he spent all his money to buy me that new PlayStation 2! Right Uncle David?" Derrik stuck his tongue out at his sister.

"Hey now!" I said, "No one's getting anything if you both don't calm down. I have to go in and say hi to everyone. Presents later."

"Yes Uncle David." they both said in unison.

"No go collect all the presents from the car and bring them inside and put them under the tree for me please?" I asked smiling.

"Sure!" Derrik said.

They both ran off towards the car and I continued to make my way to the front door. I opened the door and walked inside. I was immediately greeted with the most delicious smell ever. My mother's cooking.

"Anybody home?" I yelled out into the house.

"David?!" I heard my aunt Linda shriek from the other room.

The next thing I knew she was in the hallway sprinting towards me. I tried to dodge her but she leaped and landed on me knocking me over.

"Where the hell have you been boy?!?!" she screamed while giving me a big kiss.

"Uh....." I started to laugh.

"Come in here and say hi to your uncle Jay mister! He's been waiting all night!" she said dragging me into the living room.

When we reached the living room I noticed that there was a face I hadn't seen before. I shrugged it off and said my hello's before taking off into the kitchen to say hi to my mother.

I was greeted by my sister in the dining room.

"Hey bro! Long time no see!" she said hugging me.

"Hey! It's not MY fault you decided to move 2 hours away!" I said pretending to be mad.

"Oh give it up Davey!" she laughed. Only my sister calls me Davey. Her name is Janet. She's 2 years older then me. She's married and has 2 kids (Jessie and Derrik). A few years ago, she moved about 2 hours south of London to Windsor.

I continued to the kitchen to say hello to my mother.

"It's about time. You move out and it's like you've forgotten where you lived the passed 20 years." she chuckled. I gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"It smells great mom." I said. She raised an eyebrow and motioned for me to get out. I laughed and left the kitchen.

On my way back to the living room I bumped into my cousin Jamie.

"Couz!" he chuckled.

"Jamie!" I said as we hugged. Jamie and I are best friends. When I first came out...it was to him, and he accepted me whole heartedly.

"So who's the lucky man?" he asked seriously.

"Uh...well.....you see......" I started to say.

"Still?!" he asked annoyed.

"Well c'mon Jamie. It's not easy. Eric really hurt me." I said matter-of-factly.

"I know. Well anyway. Come with me. I want you to meet a friend of mine. I brought him with me to spend Christmas with us. He's up here on tour so he can't see his family till next week after New Years." he said grabbing my hand.

He dragged me out into the games room where most of the younger family members were.

"Heya David!" a few of my younger cousins said.

"Hey guys!" I said.

"David. This is my friend Kevin." he said pointing to the man standing beside us.

"Hi. I'm David" I said extending my hand.

"Kevin." he smiled and shook my hand.

Those eyes....what are they saying. I couldn't stop staring into Kevin's eyes. There was something about them. They were trying to tell me something.

"Earth to David!" Jamie snapped his fingers in front of my face.

"Er...sorry. I'm really tired." I said blushing and walking over to the bar fridge.

"What the hell was that all about?" Jamie came over and said almost whispering.

"I have NO idea. I couldn't stop looking into his eyes." I said trying to hide my embarassment.

"Ooooooohhhh. I see what's going on." Jamie giggled like a little school girl.

"Oh stop it!" I smacked him, "It's not like that. It was something else."

"Ah well. Either way...Kevin isn't your type." he said.

"And like you know what type I like." I smirked.

We both laughed and walked back over to Kevin.

"Sorry about that Kevin." I said.

"For what?" he smiled.

"Er. Nothing." I blushed again. Damn it! I have to stop blushing.

"DINNER'S READY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" we all heard my mother scream at the top of her lungs. The whole family piled into the dining room.

We all ate and chatted. Just light conversation. I was seated beside Jamie. And beside him was Kevin. I noticed him look at me a few times, but thought nothing of it.

Once dinner was finished, it was time to open gifts.

We all made our way into the living room.

"Alright!" I shouted, "This is how it's going to work. All the presents have been put into piles by name. I'll hand a present out from each pile to that person. We'll continue to do this till all the presents are gone. Understood?" I said sternly looking directly at all the younger kids.

Everyone agree'd.

About an hour and a half later, all the presents were given out and everyone was exchanging thank you's and talking about their gifts. I looked around at everyone with great contentment on my face. But something was missing......Kevin.

"Jamie.." I whispered, "Where's Kevin?"

Jamie looked around, "I dunno. Maybe he felt a little left out and went for a walk. I'll go find him."

"No no. It's ok. I'll go." I said, "I need some fresh air anyway."

Jamie nodded.

I made my way to the front door and looked outside. I couldn't see anyone. So I decided to take a look upstairs.

I slowly walked down the hallway upstairs and peered in all the doors. As I neared my bedroom I heared someone sniffling. As if someone was, or had been crying. I quietly walked up to the door and lightly knocked.

"Uh...er....c'mon..." I heard Kevin's voice.

I poked my head in, "You like my room?" I giggled.

"Oh...er..I'm so sorry. I didn't.." he tried to say looking very embarassed.

"Shhhh. No no it's ok. Really. What's the matter Kevin?" I asked with concern on my face.

"It's nothing. Just homesick I guess. You guys all looked so happy opening your presents. I just needed to sit alone and think for a bit. That's all." he said wiping another tear from his eye.

"Well you sit here and think all you want Kevin. It's ok with me. I'm here if you need to talk to anyone." I said smiling.

"Thanks." he said giving me a weak smile. I left him alone.

I went back downstairs and let Jamie in on what happened. He said thanks and we both went and grabbed ourselves a drink in the kitchen.

"Hey look." Jamie said, "I didn't mean what I said earlier."

I raised an eyebrow, "What are you going on about?"

"You know. When I said he wasn't your type." he smiled.

"Uh...ok..." I said, "I think you lost me."

"Kevin's gay." he said.

"Oh. Wow. Ok......" I said blushing.

"C'mon. I know you're attracted to him." he said punching me in the arm playfully.

"So! That doesn't mean I'm ready for that kind of thing just yet." I said getting a tad aggitated.

"Hey...whoa relax. Just saying Couz." he said smiling.

"I know." I said looking away.

"Well David...I'm leaving tomorrow. I'm heading back to Orlando. Kevin's staying here in Canada till next week. He's gonna be in Toronto till he leaves. After that, he's going to Lexington to visit his family. Then he's coming back home to Orlando. We're roomies. He'll be there for the better part of the year before he starts recording agian." Jamie said.

"Recording?" I asked confused.

"Yeah. I said he was on tour remember?" he laughed.

"Oh yeah..." I said still confused.

"He's part of a very popular band so to speak. So of course, anything that was said between you and I tonight is hush hush." he smiled.

"What band?" I asked curiously.

"Backstreet Boys." he chuckled, "You mean you didn't recognize him?"

"Backstreet Boys? Wow. No I didn't. I've listened to their stuff...just never seen them before." I said.

"Well anyway....Maybe you could come down for a visit in Orlando. Get to know him better." he said slyly.

I was just about to make a comment when Kevin walked in.

"Kev! You alright buddy?" Jamie asked concerned.

"Yeah. I'm ok thanks. Just needed some fresh air." he said smiling, "So what are you 2 talking about? It looked pretty intense."

"I was just trying to convince my couz here to come visit us in Orlando this spring." Jamie grinned evilishly.

"Ah. That sounds like fun. You gonna come for a visit David?" Kevin asked.

I looked at him for a second. Deeply into his eyes. It was there again. His eyes were trying to say something. But I couldn't read them. "We'll see." I said smiling and looking away.

What the hell is wrong with me. It's been almost 2 years since Eric. Why can't I move on? Or maybe I can, and I just don't want to.

I spent the next couple of hours catching up with other family members, and before I knew it....I was starting to get tired. So I decided to head home.

"Uncle David! Thanks SO much for the PlayStation 2!" Derrik shouted at me while I put my shoes on. My sister popped her head out into the hallway, "Yes David. Thank you SO much." she said sarcastically. I just laughed.

I said goodnight to everyone and began my drive home.

The whole time all I could think about was what I saw in Kevin's eyes. I couldn't for the life of me figure it out. I'm almost positive Jamie told him I was gay. Jamie usually blurts it out wherever we are. He doesn't care. And if someone has a problem with it...Jamie usually deals with them. And it isn't usually very pretty. Either way...I don't know why I was so attract.....no....addicted to Kevin's eyes. I was majorly obsessing. I'm not usually like this.

I pulled into my driveway and parked the car. I walked up to my house. Took a deep breath, and just stood there admiring it. I worked hard to get this house. It took me years to obtain my current position at work. I was now accounts manager at a majorly famous company. My family has always been pretty well off, but I was never the type to take advantage of it. I always worked for what I got.

I unlocked the door, stepped inside and turned off the alarm. I took my shoes off, walked over to my couch and passed out......

To be continued.........

**************************************************************************** E-Mail: gussie@neoncrayon.com IRC: Gussie (irc.altnet.org)

Next: Chapter 2: Dying Eyes 1 2


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