I was fifty three years old and had never been with a guy except goofing around with one close friend when we were 13 to 17 years old. Jerking off mostly. But I thought about nothing else almost all day long every day of my adult life. Why are we like that? Who knows why it takes so long to admit we are gay and really want a guy instead of covering up our lives with trying to be married and raise kids to keep everyone off guard and off our ass. Over 40 years of marriage so far, and it seems it will withstand my encounters. Why are some wives willing to accept our infidelities yet others want a divorce?
Of course through the years I was accused of being gay many times by co workers and some recently met friends, but I always denied it. Looking back I know now some how I gave off that gay either look or mannerisms. But I for the life of me could not figure what I was doing to out myself in some way. Perhaps those that asked me had their own gaydar working, yet I was not smart enough to challenge them.
I was a mechanic in dealership garages only, and felt that was proof I was not gay. Little did I know at that time there are gays in every walk of life. I realized that at about 55 years old. Slow learner I guess.
At about this fifty three years age I found the computers and internet. Thanks to the gay chats I found behind my wife's back, I was able to chat honestly about my desire to suck a cock, but was afraid to talk one on one with guys I had met in person I suspected of being gay. I just could not get discovered as I was quite well know throughout the area.
As I did like pussy still to that day, I hoped to meet someone that was BI like myself, but was never lucky until the internet came along.
I finally found a guy 38 years old totally gay on a gay chat, and he lived alone about 15 miles away. I hoped the distance would keep anyone from finding out I was gay, because it was obvious he was gay, just one sentence from him told you.
We agreed that I'd go to his house and see if I liked to be with another guy for sex. After meeting him I was thrilled by his handsome looks and body. He was my height and a lot thinner. We chatted on his sofa for a while talking about guy sex and of course I was hard right away, which he could see. We started kissing and fondling for a few minutes and then he said lets get comfortable upstairs in his bedroom. I was ready for this for sure.
We got undressed and lay side by side kissing and feeling each others cocks and then he went down on my cock. I was in total shock how much better a guy could be on dick than my wife and a few other girls when I was young. He sold me on cock sucking right then and there! I asked him if I could suck his cock.
He said to me, look if your not comfortable doing that, he would not mind at all as gay guys love to give head whether they get it in return is not important. I said no I came to try it and I'd like to get started.
He again said, look if you do like this, you will probably be in divorce court within 2 years, as this lifestyle is hard on marriage. Thinking to myself I had seldom been getting any sex from my wife for years and that was one reason I thought guy sex was easier to handle that getting another woman as we all know that gets found out quickly by the wives.
I told him I was ready to face whatever came about and he offered his cock to me. I looked at it kissed it gently on the head and then licked it up and down the shaft and was amazed at the firm yet soft great taste a dick is. I swallowed it as far as I could before gagging a little and when I came up I worked my tongue around the head to taste the best pre cum taste I had ever knew existed. With that I now was totally a confirmed cock sucker for life. We exchanged blow jobs for quite a while before I let him cum in my mouth as I sucked him hard and fast to completion. He came quite a load, and he said not to swallow it, but too late I already had swallowed his load. I loved the taste of his pure white cum, nothing is better than pre cum and good white cum, except rimming, which I only did that many years later with only one guy so far. Another story for later.
We met many times after this and eventually we fucked each other but for some reason it hurt more than made me feel good. I love to get fucked now so it must have been something between us that didn't go right.
I found out later he was getting into drugs and that scared me, so I stopped seeing him when I found out about the drugs and a few guys living with him.
I feel sorry for guys that need drugs to put the real world out of their lives. It never works but they think otherwise until it hits em on the head and they start thinking straight. I just feel less safe for sex with them.
I'm not a prude about it as I know a lot of guys into the drugs, I do not judge them nor care they do it, as I feel it is their right to do whatever they want to themselves. I told them just don't expect me to join them. We get along very well still to this day. They respect me for never talking about it with them or telling others about their use of it.