Two long weeks had finally decided to pass. The day had finally arrived that I would meet Johnny for the first time. I didn't manage to sleep very much that night due to the fact that I was thinking about Johnny and how he was in person. I wondered if he was the same kind of person he was online. I hoped he was, but he would probably be a bit different in person. It seems most people act differently on the net since their identities are hidden behind a screen, and so people feel more confident or some crap like that. Sounds stupid, but it's true. Personally online, I'm different; I seem to have a lot more to say to people I've just met.
I got out of bed and opened the blinds on the window to let in some sun. After brushing my teeth and fixing up my hair, I walked downstairs to grab some breakfast. My mother and Nick were already awake and having their breakfast.
"Mornin'," I said.
"Shut up," my brother mumbled half asleep.
"Someone's in a good mood," I stated sarcastically.
He raised his head slowly and gave me an expressionless face. I just flashed him a smile and went over to the fridge to grab some milk. My mother didn't pay any attention to us; she just stared into her coffee blankly.
I grabbed a cereal bowl and got my favorite cereal, Golden Grahams, and took a seat at the kitchen table. As I ate, thoughts raced through my mind like an Indy 500 race. I had mixed emotions about today; I was both excited and nervous all at the same time. There also was a little bit of guilt someone there because of the whole 'Andy and Johnny' thing. I wasn't too sure what Johnny meant in the e-mail by, "...get to know you better in another way". I figure he means sexually, but I'm not sure if I want that. Before Andy came along I'd be all for it. Now, it wouldn't feel right.
I had talked to Johnny yesterday and we confirmed all the details; we were to meet at the movies at noon. He told me to buy a ticket for some movie I had no interest in seeing, but I figured there was no point in arguing about the movie. I mean, how much of the movie are we really going to pay attention to if you're meeting someone for the first time? I personally just thought we'd meet at the cinema and go somewhere else to talk. But what can you do?
"Oh mom! I'm gonna go check out a movie with some friends later, ok?"
She lifted her head a bit from the coffee and nodded her head. My mother's not much of a morning person so I'm used to her 'morning-silence'. I took a last spoonful of cereal and walked over to the sink to drop off the plate.
"What you gonna do today Nick?" I asked.
"I ain't feelin' too hot, so probably just stay in. What do you care anyway," he answered.
As you can probably tell, Nick's an asshole in the morning. That's something else I'm used to so it doesn't bother me any. I just rolled my eyes at him and made my way to the shower. I must have been in there long enough to take all the hot water. Everyone in my families got some 'problem' in the morning. My mom being quiet and depressed, my brother being an ass, and me taking way too damn long in the shower. No one's perfect, I guess. I could literally stay in the shower for longer than an hour each morning, if my mother doesn't do something to get me out. When she thinks I've had enough, instead of yelling at me to get out since I never could hear her because of the radio blasting in there, she goes around the house and flushes every toilet. Sounds cruel, but I appreciate it.
I jumped out of the shower, shivering from the instant freeze of the changing water temperature, and wrapped a towel around myself. I dried myself as I searched for something to wear. I decided on a pair of Tommy Jeans and a black t-shirt. When I had finished changing, I looked over at the clock and read 11:26am. I realized the limited amount of time I had and rushed to grab my wallet and get out of the house. I don't work, so my wallet is usually empty considering I spend my allowance before I actually get it. So I sneaked my way towards my mother's purse and took out 20 bucks. I don't usually do this, so don't consider me a bad child. But she's got enough cash to not miss 20 bucks, and I need it anyway, so why not. I would have asked her for it, but then she'd start lecturing me on how I should start to save my money instead of always spend it. That would be a waste of a good 30 minutes I didn't want to lose.
I walked out of the door and headed to the cinema. The cinema was a totally new one that had been built only a couple months ago near my house, so it was walking distance. It was a warm, sunny day with the annoying sounds of birds singing. Before I got tempted enough to attempt to ring a bird's neck, I saw Andy mowing his lawn. I glanced at my watch and figured I had enough time to stop and say hello. I walked across the street and focused my eyes on his body. He was bare-chested wearing only a cap and a pair of jeans. This is one of those moments where you wish you could freeze time and just stare for as long as you want. When Andy noticed me walking up to him, he stopped the lawn mower and flashed me one of his perfect smiles.
"Hey you," he said.
"Hey. You tryin' to get a modeling deal or somethin'?" I teased.
"Oh," he started to laugh a bit, "I got hot, what can I say."
"You've always been hot from what I can remember."
He seemed to blush a little and smiled again.
"So, you headed somewhere?" he asked.
"Um...yeah. I just thought I'd go catch a movie," I answered.
"Want some company?"
"You know what? In all other situations I'd say yes, but my father's meeting me there. He says he wants to spend some quality time or something," I lied. But what could I have said? That I was going to meet some gay guy from online? Exactly, I'm glad we agree.
"Why isn't your bro goin' with ya?" He asked curiously.
"Oh...um....my father just wanted to spend time with me today."
"Oh okay. Have fun cutie."
"Thanks. We'll catch a movie another time, promise," I said, winking at him.
He smiled again and gave me a wink. I was so tempted to grab him and kiss him right there on the street, but we're two guys so I had to make sure the coast was clear. I looked around to see if anyone was around at all. When I didn't see anybody in sight, I leaned in to him and gave him a short kiss.
"Love ya buddy." With that, I started walking away.
I heard the lawn mower start up again and he started his work as if I didn't even stop to talk to him. I really meant what I said when I told him that I loved him. He's a great guy and a lot of fun to be with. I'm sure that if I met Johnny after Andy, I wouldn't even bother going to meet him.
I had reached the cinema at exactly 11:58 AM. I walked in and bought my ticket for the movie that we had planned to watch. I took a seat on the bench inside the cinema waiting for Johnny to come. As I waited, I saw a few people that I recognized from around my area or from school. One even being Kial's 'girlfriend' and her family. I just smiled at her as she passed me and waved. I checked my watch again, 12:13 PM. I started to think he stood me up or something. I was about to get up and walk around, when I got a tap on the shoulder.
"Ricky?" he asked.
I turned around and noticed another familiar face. Oh my god! It was Mark Spencer! I tried to force myself to act cool and look casual.
"Yeah, umm... hey Mark. How's it goin'?"
"Not bad, not bad. So, what you doin' here?" he asked.
"I'm...uh...I'm just...uh...waiting for someone," I tried to say as smoothly as possible.
"Hmm...a chick?" He raised his eyebrows a bit. God he was so damn cute! I tried to control my breathing, but it wasn't easy.
"Naw. Just a friend."
"Well that's cool. When were you supposed to meet up with this friend?" he asked.
"Like 20 minutes ago."
I started to laugh a bit under my breath. He started to do the same and put an arm on my shoulder.
"Well I'm waiting for my ride to pick me up so do you mind if I wait with you?"
"Naw, not at all," I said as I shifted over on the bench to let Mark have a seat.
"Thanks dude."
We talked for a good 15 minutes with each other. He was actually a lot more than just a good looking guy. He had a cool personality and had a great sense of humor. Johnny didn't seem to want to show-up. He may have chickened out or something, but sometimes good things happen in bad situations. I mean, waiting for Johnny actually gave me a chance to get to know Mark.
When Mark's ride showed up, he extended his hand to do one of those cool handshake maneuvers. But what do you expect? Mark's a cool guy.
"It was nice talkin' to ya dude," he said.
"Yeah, nice talkin' to you too," I answered back.
"Well, I guess I'll talk to ya at 4 again. See-ya."
I smiled as he walked away. What he had just said didn't hit me right away as being weird. I talk to Johnny at...
"At 4?" I called out as he was almost out the door.
He turned around and was flush red. His eyes were widened and he looked both afraid and embarrassed. I stood up slowly and walked towards him. The emotions I was feeling were indescribable. I didn't say anything until I reached him and stood face-to-face. His face was lowered in embarrassment and his eyes looked lost as if he was staring into space.
"...Johnny?"
He raised his head slowly a bit and gently nodded. I noticed a tear drop run down his cheek as I stared at him. I didn't know what else to say; I was speechless. I stood, staring at him for what seemed like an hour before a couple kids rushed past us and brought me back to reality.
"...why?" I asked some what confused
"sigh I guess I didn't want you to know who I was right away or word may come out at school. You know, I was kinda worried people would sense something. We do have a class together and all."
"So let me get this straight. To save your ass from being humiliated at school, you decided to lie to someone else and make them feel like a dumb ass after. Is that how it is? Clue me in, 'cause that's the feeling I'm getting."
"Ah common Ricky. You know that's not what I wanted to do intentionally. It just...happened that way, I guess. I'm sorry. I really like you, honestly."
I looked into his eyes for a short while, watching the pain he was feeling inside. I felt almost bad for him, but that still didn't change the fact that he lied to me. How do I know that all the things he said to me while we were online are true? Once a liar always a liar, is what I was always told. I guess what I was wondering before about 'Johnny' being the same person as he was online, literally was not true.
At that point in time, I didn't know whether I was shocked because Mark Spencer is actually gay, angry because he lied to me, or excited because Mark Spencer's gay AND he likes me. I felt very confused and almost used.
As I kept my eyes on him, he slowly backed away and was heading out the door to his ride. Before he could too far away to hear me, I called out to him.
"Mark, did you know it was me before I sent you my pic?"
"Naw man. I just got lucky I guess," he answered as a weak smile sneaked its way through.
I watched him get into the car and get driven off by another individual in the driver's seat. When they had driven out of site, I started my walk back home. My head was bent forward a bit as I walked with my hands in my pocket. As I walked, two things stuck to my mind; Mark and Andy. Was I going to stay with Andy and not give Mark a chance, stick with Andy and give Mark a chance without letting Andy find out, or make my life easier and more lonely by leaving them both alone and going my own sweet way?