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Warning: This erotic fiction contains sexual experiences between fictional adult males. If this is not your thing, leave now. Furthermore, any similarity to any person, place or thing living or dead is merely coincidental.
There is no safe sex in this story because it is fiction. Remember: In real life, play as safe as possible preferably no exchange of bodily fluids.
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Growing Up Naked http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/incest/growing-up-naked/ Naked Whore http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/authoritarian/naked-whore Put Out to Pasture http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/authoritarian/put-out-to-pasture Santa's Slave Training http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/authoritarian/santas-slave-training Special Product Design http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/authoritarian/special-product-design The Trunk http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/authoritarian/the-trunk
Author's note: The fork in the road of Jim's life at the end of chapter 12 fascinated me. What does happen based on a simple decision? Where does life lead going left or right at the fork? Are there parallels anyway? We all know now how it turned out for Jim when he stayed with the cop. Not pretty by most judgments, but certainly valid when as person releases themself to another. Now let's explore an alternate Universe for Jim. Enjoy.
Downward Spiral of Jim – Rick – Part One
When I came back to the table I asked Rick if we could leave. I didn't even sit back down. Rick obliged. He was gracious throughout. He drove me back to my home. I started to get out and he stopped me.
"Jim, I won't pine for you, but if you ever change your mind and I haven't gotten in another relationship, the invitation is still open." Rick smiled through the hurt on his face.
He got out of the car to open my door. Once I stood, he took me in his arms kissing me with the passion that only love gives. I started to cry. He held me for a moment, and then said, "You better go now, Jim. Thank you."
I said, "Thank you for being my friend and for the most wonderful day of my life."
I walked into my home with the cop. I searched around to see if Sir was back. He still wasn't. I went to put my clothes away and resume my naked place. When I went to the closet I started to unbutton my shirt. I loosened three buttons and stopped. I couldn't do it. I started to get frightened. I said to myself, `Oh God, Jim. Take off your clothes. If you don't, it will mean the relationship with the cop is over. Do it. Do it now.' I went back into the living room and sat down on the sofa. I never sat on the furniture in the living room. The only furniture I sat on was the kitchen and dining room chairs. Any place else in the house I either stood or sat on the floor.
The cop not being home gave me a chance to get my head straight. If I didn't get my butt off this couch and my clothes off, it meant that I was walking away from a man that abused and belittled me. I was walking away from being with someone who was "superior" to me in every way, but was really just a first class asshole. I had seen true kindness and love today. Whether Rick and I would be together was insignificant. I realized no one had to treat me like this. Then, the most horrible thought came to me. I compared Rick to the cop. Rick was brawny, not very handsome, strong, loving, kind. The cop was a standard hunk. He was handsome. He fit into that crowd at the restaurant and so did I. When I was with the cop in those societal circles, we both were the toast of them. That would never be that way with Rick. Rick did not have that je ne sais quoi necessary for that haughty group. Was I really that shallow? Was I here in this Master/slave union with the cop because he was better for me in public?
I continued to look back. I thought about my life with David. What was that life? It was a life of exterior. It was a life of pomp. Seeing David today showed me that nothing had changed with him. He married for looks just like he had been in the relationship with me. When I went against that grain, he dumped me fast and hard.
But wasn't I doing the same thing? Being married to the cop was once again all exterior. There was no connection to the relationship we portrayed to the outside world and the reality of the Master/slave bond it was in private. It was a double life.
Fuck. If I'm pointing a finger, there are three pointing back. What was the common denominator here? Me. I was. I was just as condescending, just as concerned with outside appearances, just as compartmentalized as David or the cop. No wonder I was here. No wonder I was a slave faggot.
With this realization, I almost jumped off the couch and ran to the bedroom to take off my clothes. If I didn't do this right now, I was committing to a life where I would have to switch from being a snotty-nosed, uppity faggot bottom slave to a kind, loving responsible man. I would have to become like Rick. I would have to not care what people thought of me. I would have to stop being the judgmental bastard and social-climbing whore that I had been all my life. I knew my place here. To leave would mean becoming a man. Could I do that? I didn't know, but I wasn't getting off the couch to take my clothes off so this must be my answer.
Sir came home about two hours later. He walked into the living room to see my sitting on the couch with my clothes on. He knew what this meant.
"Sir, I want a divorce."
The cop matter-of-factly said, "Jim, I am no longer your Sir. Take a suitcase and pack all your clothes and personal belongings. I will take you to a hotel that you can use until you get a place. I will call our attorney on Monday to start the process and to clean up the connections between us. I will have a job for you by week's end as I promised. Look for a little apartment over the next few days. I will pay for it until you get on your feet. I'll call the phone company and take your phone off restriction. You can get a new one after your first paycheck."
"That's it. No discussion. Nothing." I asked.
"Jim, you don't get it. The relationship we were in was not about discussion and compromise. I was your Master. If you were to be my slave, you had to play by my rules. I thought you knew that. I thought you understood that I loved you. But, it became apparent that you couldn't fully engage to be a slave. You were so close. I fully believed that tonight I would come home and you would turn yourself over to me completely and that we could move to the next level in our union. But, instead, you are clothed. You are sitting on the furniture. You said the safe word, `divorce'. I was wrong. You are just another one of those gay men that fantasize about being a slave, but are not willing to go to any lengths to get it."
I reluctantly got off the couch saying, "Ok, I'll get my things." I went to the bedroom, took out a suitcase and packed everything that the cop had bought me. I picked up my trust papers and my copy of our agreements. When I emerged with suitcase in tow, the cop said, "Let's go."
We got in the car and he drove me to a nice hotel. He told me he would call when the meeting for the divorce was set. He said to expect a call this week for your job. The job is a done deal. No questions asked. "Bye, Jim."
"Bye." That was it. I wanted to scream at him, `Can't we at least talk? Maybe if we talked, we wouldn't be in this situation.' But, the cop said to me that it was his way or not. So, I got out of the car and walked into the hotel. Tears were streaming down my face. I went up to the front desk. The woman was very kind and proficient not wanting me to stand there any longer than necessary under the circumstances. I thanked her and went to my room. I walked in and sat down in the chair. Staring across the room at the tasteful, yet highly generic décor, I said out loud, "I've just made the worst mistake of my life."
On Monday morning, I got a call from the attorney to set up an appointment to come in and sign the paperwork. My new boss called saying that I was to start a week from today. The cop was ways so efficient and this was no exception. I found a little studio apartment near my employment where I would walk and not need a car.
I put on the brave face at work. There were people there who knew I was married to the cop and that we were getting a divorce. Everyone gave me a little slack; however, I did my best burying my sorrows into my work. The service role that I had known was torn from me. I had to replace it fast and the best way I knew how was to be a good employee and serve the company.
I didn't call Rick for a month. I just couldn't. The best day of my life had turned into the worst day of my life. I felt as if I was a complete failure and he wouldn't have anything to do with me. Finally, I got up my nerve. Rick was so sweet on the phone and asked if we could meet for coffee. We did.
Rick arrived first and when I walked in he immediately stood up to hug me and pull out my chair. "Would you like something to drink?"
"Yes, Rick. I'll take a Venti Americano." I smiled. I was always the one fetching something. It was nice to have someone acknowledge my existence.
When Rick sat back down he took my hand in his meaty paws and said, "God, it is good to see you."
I immediately cried. I couldn't help it. The last month of my life had been hell and this was the first time I gave myself permission to feel.
"It's ok babe. Rick is here."
We talked for a couple of hours. I had a lot to say and Rick knew he would have to be patient with me. We did not go to his house and have sex. Rick stayed true to his word at the restaurant; he was not going to rescue me from my leaving the cop. In fact, we only met once-a-week at the coffee shop for several months with no trips to the sack. Rick wanted me and he knew the only way to have me fully was to allow me to feel, walk through my challenges and become a man on my own two feet, something that I had never been in my life.
Finally, Rick invited me over to his house for dinner. It was a beautiful evening. He served an amazing meal with a significantly large portion for himself. He was a big man. Afterward, we sat on the couch and kissed for over an hour. I wanted to rip my clothes off and be with him, but he instead took me home. Rick was bound to his word that I was going walk through my recovery from being the cop's slave. Rick wanted me completely. Rick knew that if we had sex, I might feel recovered, when in fact; the sex simply muddled my feelings. I walked in the door and spurt a load even before I got my shoes off. Then, I shot another one when I got naked in bed. Fuck I wanted to be with him.
We dated for over a year. Unlike the whore that I had been, I was completely monogamous with Rick. When we did eventually have sex, it was the best sex I ever had; just as the first time on my wedding day. No one ever came close. Rick was very romantic. He loved little things like walking hand in hand, going to a nice restaurant, fixing dinner for me at his home. He was this huge, loveable teddy bear of a man. The juxtaposition between his physical size and his kindness sometimes took me off guard. There was a part of me that wanted him to take me and fuck me hard like the little slut whore I had been. Rick was a total top, but he was not going to make me his slut whore to show his strength or superiority. Rick was a far more confident man than that. This is not to say that our roles were not well defined. They were. Rick was all man and was a mix.
The night Rick and I had sex I will remember forever. We had only had sex that one other time on my wedding day to the cop. That was a few years back so my pent up desires were strong. Rick invited me to come over to his home for another of his delicious meals. Rick always dressed well and he expected no less from me. The evening was as romantic as a girl could ever have. There was lovely music in the background. The dinner was with candlelight. There were several courses of food paired with the correct wine. Rick knew how to prep so well that he would leave the table for less than five minutes between courses. His plating was spot on.
Afterward we adjourned to the living room. We sat and held each other not speaking for a while letting our dinner rest. Rick turned to me quietly and said, "It's time, Jim." He leaned over and kissed me softly on the lips. The feeling of this big man holding me made everything alright with the world. I finally was with a man that was loving, still in control, but not controlling.
"Really Rick? Oh, Rick, I love you." I started to cry.
Rick just held me. He knew that I was a big baby at heart. I suspect he knew that I would have to cry first before we could make love. "It's ok, baby. Let it out, baby. Rick is here. Rick will hold you. Rick wants to be with you. Rick wants to take care of you. I love you, Jim."
When I relaxed Rick started to kiss me sweetly on my lips. He moved down my neck as he gently undid my pants. I leaned away from him for a minute to take of my shirt and remove the rest of my clothes. I wanted to be naked for him. I wanted to show him my body. I stood up in front of him when I was completely nude.
Rick exclaimed, "My God, you are beautiful baby. You are as magnificent as I remember you from before."
I looked down at this brute of a man staring at me. It was so erotic to be displayed naked in front of him; not as an object but for the incredible appreciation he had for me. I came back down to him on the couch. Rick was so strong that he lifted me onto my back laying me flat on the couch with him still clothed piling on top of me. He touched every inch of my body with his lips and hands. The gentleness of his caressing was extraordinary. All I could do was moan and hold onto my big man.
When he was finished anointing me, he got up, took my hand and led me to the bedroom. He walked me in directly me to lie down on the bed. I slowly played with my dripping cock while Rick took off his clothes. Rick undressed very slowly. He wanted me to worship his body, which I was more than happy to do. He unbuttoned his shirt revealing his hairy chest and stomach. He pushed down his pants stepping out of them. He had a nice wet spot on his colored underwear where the tip of his restrained, but hard cock was.
I had been to bed with lots of handsome, well-built men over the years, but Rick was my first power lifter man. Everything about him was extra thick; his neck, his pecs, his biceps, his forearms, his hands, his stomach, his calves, his thighs and that beer can-sized cock. He was the ultimate. No one had, nor anyone in the future, would even come close to the sexuality and magnificence of Rick. I could have shot my load hands free watching this tease.
Rick came to bed with me. He held me so tight while he kissed me hard. Rick's body enveloped me. I wasn't a small guy, but Rick had about 80 lbs. on me. I felt like an elf next to him.
We were the exact opposite hair-wise. Rick was hairy all over including his back and not a bit on his head. I had hair on my head, but thanks to the cop, my body was completely devoid of hair and I would never grow hair again. I buried my face into him. I devoured his cock. Rick loved me to suck and lick his armpits. I think that I could have made him cum just burrowing deep into his hairy pits. When I was done with pleasuring his dick and pits, his aroma transferred onto my face and body. I would never quite smell like myself ever again. There was always this hint of Rick on my body.
Rick eventually decided that he was going to place his man seed inside me. This was when Rick would get very forceful. He placed me on my stomach asking me to use my hands to spread my cheeks as wide as possible. Rick had an incredible tongue and he tongue-fucked my pussy well in advance of inserting his love inside me. This was very hard to deal with because my cock was rock hard and rubbing up against the mattress as he ate me out. It took massive amounts of control not to release.
Rick's tongue left my wanting hole and I felt him shift his body into position to fuck me. He spread my legs wide as he pressed his babymaker inside. At first, it was just his dick I felt inside me, but then he lowered his entire body onto my back. I felt his thick stomach resting on my lower back. His massive arms wrapped themselves around my torso. He kissed the back of my neck as he started to move in and out. My pussy was so receptive that if I was an actual woman I would have jizzed pussy juice from the experience.
"Oh, yeah baby. Feel Rick inside you. Yeah, you want Rick in you, don't you baby? You want Rick's cock. You want Rick's love in you. Rick loves you so much baby and Rick is going to give you the ultimate Rick prize, Rick's sperm. You are so fucking hot Jim. You pussy is so moist. Rick loves fucking you. Oh baby. Oh fuck. Hold on tight baby. Rick's gonna give you his love. Rick's going to impregnate you. Oh yeah. Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck Jim. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah."
Rick shot a load so large I felt it. He collapsed onto me. My god he was fucking heavy, but I could have cared less. Rick's had fucked me. Rick had made love to me. Rick had treated me the way that I always wanted to be treated, but never knew. I never wanted this moment to end.
Rick finally rolled off of me. "Ok baby. Let's get you off." Rick lay on his back taking my body and directing my mouth to his nipples. "Suck on them baby and jerk off. I want to see my little man's jizz shoot while he makes love to my pecs." Naturally, being a nipple whore, I nursed my man's breasts until they were raw and sore. I held on to him for dear life as I suck and suck on his nipples. I rubbed my dick up against his thick thigh. I didn't even want to touch my dick. I wanted both my hands holding onto him. I loved rubbing my dick on his body. Feeling the thickness of each part whether a thigh or stomach or rubbing our dicks together, I just wanted to embrace him massaging my dick until it spurt juice on his hairy self.
I did fall in love with Rick. Hell, the reality was I was in love with Rick for a long time. Why else did I do what I did by divorcing the cop? Rick and I had a great time together. We were so simpatico. Rick and I never were at a loss for conversation. Nor did we need to talk all the time. We were so comfortable with each other. Rick lost his friendship with the cop. He had to change gyms so they wouldn't run into each other. The hard part was the lingering of my own snobbery about who I should be seen with. Rick confronted me about it finally. Rick was no idiot.
Rick took me out to a lovely dinner. It was at a fancy restaurant, not the crème de la crème of my birthday, but a special place that was frequented by a large gay clientele. The place was quite stylish. The crowd was smart, sophisticated, snobbish... I fit right in.
During dinner, more than one couple from my past came up to chat. I was a little dismissive partly because I did not want to talk about what happened between David and I, or what happened with my marriage to the cop. The main challenge, though, was that it brought up all my embarrassment that my new boyfriend did not fit the image of the previous ones. The irony was that some of the people we ran into knew about what happened with David because of the news. They were friends who had dropped me like a hot potato upon seeing my naked body dragged out of the rest area making the local news and the Internet sites. Yet, I'm embarrassed with my new boyfriend who was the most kind and gentle person in the world? Yet, I'm the one who with a criminal record and a disgraced past?
"Jim, what's going on with your body language?"
Oh, I so didn't want to talk about this. "Nothing, Rick. I'm fine."
"No, Jim. You're not. I'm not pretty enough for you, am I? I am the best person that you have ever been with, yet, because I'm not classically handsome like your previous partners, you are embarrassed."
"Oh, Rick. I love you. Please, you have to know that. I have to explain. The afternoon I asked for a divorce from the cop, the same afternoon of our lovely lunch, the same afternoon of the most wonderful day of my life, I realized that I was a snotty-nosed faggot. That I had made all my lover decisions based on looks and dominance. It was a horrible insight. I was just like David and the cop. This is the first time that I have had to confront this with my past being here today with you. I am so sorry. I apologize. I'm hurting your feelings."
"Does this mean you don't want to be with me?" Rick asked.
"No, Rick. I have never wanted to be with anyone more than I want to be with you. I am just having a problem. It's my problem and I have to get over it."
"You sure as shit do, Jim. I am going to take you home. Check please."
By this point, I was crying. I had hurt Rick deeply. I could tell he was pissed. Now, I don't think this was a surprise to Rick. I feel it was the moment when the argument needed to occur. He may have even set this up because this situation, this restaurant, this crowd, I could never deny his accusation.
Rick drove me home in silence. His passenger was snuffling softly. Rick stopped the car in front of my apartment and, being the typical gentleman he always was, got out of the car to open my door.
When we were standing curbside looking at each other Rick said, "Jim. I love you. I want to be with you; however, this is a problem. I'm going to need some time. I learned a long time ago that threats and ultimatums never work. Just figure out what you want and let me know."
Rick kissed me, gave me a hug, got back in his car and drove away. I stood on the sidewalk watching his car until I couldn't see it any more with tears running down my face. I knew then what I wanted, but I also knew we needed a break. I went up to my little apartment and cried myself to sleep. We didn't speak for months.
Two years to the day that I walked out of the cop's life, I married Rick. Rick was the greatest gift that was ever given to me. I finally processed out the snotty little faggot whore that I was and became a man to the man I loved for the rest of our lives together.
I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I appreciate hearing from you guys. I attempt to respond to each email within two days. Many times our conversations shape the upcoming storyline. Thank you.
Please send any comments to: douglas.marx.4@gmail.com