Hi guys! Just the usual things, you know! And let me know what you think! Thanks soooo much for the feedback!!!! :-)
Marcos
Discovering Love If you want something badly enough...
By Marcos Rojas
"The greatest love of all is happening to me, I found the greatest love of all inside of me, "The greatest love of all is easy to achieve Learning to love yourself It is the greatest love of all." Whitney Houston
From chapter 7:
Those blue eyes he tried to escape, two blue eyes he thought he would not see any more, the hoped absolution on the funeral, all the wounds of the past, all the sleepless nights, all the monsters of his past came back. Jean felt so small. Just a helpless child, far away from home, and left al alone. He knew there was no turning back. And he also knew there was no human power that could fight his son. He had all the pros on his side, and all the cons have been on his side. It was his punishment, the one he was running from ever since.
Chapter 8:
Not being able to think at all, Jed found himself heading towards his room. At least that was what it looked like. Arriving to the door he realized it wasn't his. After the first shock he looked around and found himself in the other wing of the house. This was the twin of his room; it was Raul's. His heart started beating faster. He knew he had to see his lover. And he was there. Funny how our mind can play its little tricks. "Freud was a clever guy! I really love him! I love him so much he even is in my subconscious." Jed thought and put his hand on the door handle. A moment of peace, of perfect silence where the sound of his heartbeat could be compared to the one of drums. The door slowly opened and the darkness of an unknown room welcomed Jed. He didn't bother to turn on the light, although he knew perfectly where to reach, it was just like his room. No need for lights, this was one of those moments in life where you stop using your regular five senses, you stop being a just a normal human being. Your spirit takes his flight and your body isn't big enough. Then you can start feeling things without having the necessary senses. Jed knew the room was empty. He didn't have to check it, he felt it. He knew it. He arrived too late. Through the filter of tears the room started lighting up, as he became the regular guy again. Just a boy, whose heart was full of fear again. The tears started running down his cheeks and the little Jed fell on his knees. Down on his knees in that place he never knew but where his one love used to be. One space that remained the only physical bound between them. Images of Raul sitting near him on their favorite place came back to him. That very first day where he fell for this little guy, the shy look on his lover's face, the first night together, the warmth of his body, the taste of his lips... All the memories came back crushing, breaking all his defenses. Jed lost control in this roller coaster of emotions. Anita, his father, all the memories of his mother and now Raul. It was too much for him.
"I have to stand up! We are meant to be together and I will find you! I have nothing left that's worth living for! I need you! You are the only one, my strength, my happiness, my sunshine..." He stood up and sensed the emptiness of the room again. The few rays of light revealed a fully new universe. A world that was so close but yet so far for Jed. Turning on the lights Jed was surprised by this room. It was everything his room wasn't. It was simple, almost empty. Just a bed, a desk and a closet. The emptiness welcomed Jed once again. Opening the closet there was only his gift, the outfit for the wedding. Jed took it out and embraced the piece of tissue as if it were a human being. Closing his eyes he inhaled Raul. Only the thought of Raul's skin touching the shirt made him shiver. It was all Raul, his unforgettable body perfume. Looking again Jed realized the tie was missing. There were some other clothes too, new clothes, that he didn't know.
Jed's eyes started misting up. "Angelito... I only I knew... What kind of life did you have before and at what kind of life have you been forced here? I was so blind and so selfish!" On the desk there was only one laptop and some red sheets. These made Jed shiver again. How could he have forgotten THE letter, that beautiful morning... And now all of that was gone. The thought hit him like a lightning "He never loved me! Why did he leave my gift here? He should have taken it with himself to think of me! To have a memory!" There he was again, the selfish, proud Jed. "You only played with me!" with that he hit the desk. The sound filled the empty room for a second and the laptop restarted from the shock. Jed kept on staring at the screen. There was a welcoming note> I love you forever JED!!! Just a few seconds and the message disappeared and a serious Jed was staring at him from the desktop background. It was a zoomed picture; he was on his way back to the main house from the parking lot, sunglasses on and well dressed like always. "Idiot! How could I doubt him? His love? A jerk Jed, that is what you are and will remain one till the end of your days! I don't deserve him!" Leaning back on the chair he got lost in thoughts again. Feeling his tears filling his eyes he turned to the left. "Too proud to cry Jed? For the one who really loves you?" Something red caught his eyes. There was a piece of paper behind the door, obviously thrown away.
"Jed, Mother takes me to" this was the entire message. Again Jed felt like loosing it.
"Damn bitch! Where did you bring him?" He threw away the note and wanted to exit. The tough Jed again. But he froze... Going back he took the piece of paper, the remaining clothes and the laptop with himself. "We can't let these treasures here now, can we?"
With that he was gone. Locking both his and Raul's room with the key he was on his way down. Like a hurricane he went by Rosita and in no time he was in his car. Driving by night was Jed's favorite. Turning the key in the ignition the engine started immediately.
"That's my boy! Now let's kick some asses!" With that he drove off. There was a longer avenue which lead towards the gates of the community and the entire security staff knew the mad white boy by now. So he didn't even have to show his ID, the gates opened immediately, he didn't even have to slow down. The ride was quite short. Stopping at the hospital's front entrance he could already hear someone saying he mustn't stop there.
"Oye, quien eres tu para decirme que puedo hacer?" (Who are you to tell me what I may do?) The poor guy just raised both hand as in defense. Relatives can have a weird behavior when coming to the hospital, so it was nothing unusual for him.
Just one question and he was on his way to his stepmother. "Now bitch, let's break some more bones!"
The doors opened and a very serious Jed stepped out of the elevator. 1512B... Here it is! In a hospital bed there was Anita, all by herself, with closed eyes.
"I told you I don't need anything! Just the damn painkillers!!! But that you can't give me, can you?" not even bothering to open her eyes.
"Why, if this isn't my favorite mommy! Bitchy as always! Good to know others are also on the hated-persons list!" Anita opened her eyes in horror. She was searching for the button that was her only rescue now.
"Don't bother bitch! I won't harm you! Just tell me where Raul is." Anita still had a horrified look.
The door opened and a pretty little nurse entered the room.
"Nurse, get this idiot out of here! HE broke my nose!!!" the girl just wanted to open her mouth.
All that it took Jed to find the right behavior was a look. Single-walking-hormone-bottle. "This shouldn't be hard!" he thought. With that he put on a worried face and made a sign for the nurse to follow him.
Once outside he reached under his shirt and started scratching his belly, afterwards playing with his body hair.
"Miss, look, my Mum is in a terrible shock, you know... She has been attacked and I was the first person she saw. So my image got into her brain, and to be honest, I am kind of worried. Did you give her too many painkillers? Cause she isn't quite herself..." the girl would have eaten Jed with a fork if it were for her.
"How should I explain this? As I entered the room she started cursing, telling something about the bitch nurse which didn't give her any painkillers. Now, I'm sure she wouldn't say something terrible about a nice young girl like you!" Wink. Ice. Melted ice. Wet outside and inside. Mission complete! Success 100%.
"Now would you give me a few seconds? Oh, and if she pushes the button again, don't bother to COME. I'll let you know when I leave." Wink. And gone he was back into the room.
"Where is the nurse? What did you do to her? Did you kill her too?" Anita obviously thought she was out of danger.
"No, I just made sure we could talk! So, tell me where Raul is! NOW! Oh, please, give me break! You know, there is no use for you to push that button! I told the girl you were so drugged you couldn't think clearly. She won't bother. Soooo, you have two options: a. tell me where he is, or b. first I torture you, maybe brake some more bones, and then you tell me!"
Looking very frustrated and disappointed, Anita eventually gave up on buttoning.
"See? Told ya so Mummy!" and he started playing with his fist in a suggestive way.
"I am so gonna make you pay for this!"
"Skip this part, will you? The place if you care about your looks!" he now took the scissors from near the flowers and started playing with it. "Come on now Mum, you know I will do it! I would love to leave you a little present. A memory of my never dying love for you."
"He's at the airport. He has a ticket and will fly to Mexico City to my sister. Back there where he was, in that dirty village!"
"Departure time?"
"In 36 minutes. You'll never make it!"
"Good girl! You know I love you too much to kill you! That way you couldn't enjoy the pain in you nose, and the sound of a dislocated bone." With a quick move he slightly punched Anita's nose, of course that was enough just to dislocate her nose again.
"Nurse! She became aggressive! Give her some sedatives! She broke her nose! I think she is having some kind of SM complexes!"
"You are going to pay..."
But there was no use to listen to her any more. Jed had only one goal now. 34 minutes to catch his lover. The ride was his best performance, 2 red lights, and a real rally in the city. Crushing into the airport he looked at the departure table. "Mexico city, come on! Where is it! Gate 21! Boarding! And 2 more minutes left!"
If the ride was his absolute record this was more than that.
"Come on! Not now! It can't be!"
"Sir, please stop! We finished boarding! You are too late!" The lady tried to reason but Jed ran into the gate.
"Stop! Call the security! Tell the pilot to stop! Suspect is running towards the plane!"
And there was again the tunnel. The only way, and the unknown distance, where the only sound is the one of your heartbeat and of your feet banging on the floor. A corridor leading into the unknown, and a way you have to make on your own, all by yourself and too fast. You don't know how the road looks, how long it is or how much time you have. You just have one goal and your will. "If you want something badly enough to happen it will happen!" To the left and there was the plane, and the door still open.
"Stop or I'll shoot!" Jed found himself in front of two security agents on their knees and two guns pointed towards him.
"Whoa! Easy! It's a family matter! I need to get my brother! Our mother is in the hospital!" Jed tried to reason. The guys looked at each other and one stood up. There were some curious faces, probably people from the first row who couldn't help staring.
"Slowly boy, put your hand in the air!" The agent checked Jed and nodded. "You are going to pay for the delay, you know that. Don't you?"
"Believe me, money is no problem for me!" answered a smiling Jed.
The whole plane went quiet as Jed entered. All eyes on him. But soon all eyes disappeared and there was only one scared little frame that was visible for him. His Raul. The moment was magical. Each inch made him feel his boy closer to him and a stupid grin appeared on his face.
"Come on Angelito! We are going home!"
"He isn't going anywhere! I have orders to take him with me!" An older man next to Raul answered.
"Anita is in the hospital! She wants to see her son!" Amazing how easy it was to lie. Seemed as if all he did his entire life was lying.
"I can't believe you!" The man answered.
"Well, you have no option! Anita can't speak to you! As I said before, she is in the hospital. I'm taking Raul with me!" With that he grabbed his lover by the hand and headed out.
"Ladies, pleasant flight!" Just a nod towards the shocked stewardesses.
After taking the corner Jed pushed Raul against the wall. Two misty brown eyes were looking at him.
"I love you! You are my life! Don't you ever do this to me! Don't you ever let someone tear us apart! Promise me that!" Jed sounded desperate. He was like a lost little kid.
"I promise you!" Raul whispered and pressed his lips on Jed's. They melted into each other in a passionate kiss.
To be continued???
How about some feedback? Now I have this absolutely wicked idea! Since there are sooo many lonely persons out there, searching for someone, maybe someone who should be like this or that guy from this story, why not telling me about it? Maybe some dreams can get real, and Mr. Dream can step out of dreamland. Who knows? Even if you consider me stupid or childish, give it a try. Send me some lines and I'll try to find you a friend, or maybe more... Even it will Moscow vs. Lima! :-)
Please send me also some feedback! I really love that part you know? OK, thanks for reading, and till next time, I hope!
Marcos tulindobebito@yahoo.es