This is a fictional story. It is based on many experiences and fantasies of the author. If you are really into graphic sex, it may not satisfy your purpose for coming here. If you like to hear of real love and real teen angst, with a little sex thrown in, you are in the right place. There may be some amount of graphic sex between males. If this is objectionable to you, or you are legally too young to be here, you are cordially invited to press your back button.
Characters: Denny (Dennis Andrew Miggs), 20
Garth Roth, 22
Randy Small, 24
Bob, Denny's Brother 3 years older
Gail, Bob's wife
Jack, Denny's oldest brother, 9 years older
Jack's son's, Jacky, Bobby And DennyToo
Denny's dad
Denny's mom
Ray, Denny's dad's Deputy D.A. friend
Randy's mom and step dad, who shall remain nameless!
From Chapter 7:
"Dude -- RANDY! Your dreaming!" I was so torn. But I couldn't let him do this any more.
"I WAS dreaming, Denny. I'm not now!" And he kissed me even deeper than before.
"Dude!" I said, shocked, "Are you -- are you sure you're awake?"
He then thrust himself up higher so his head was over my shoulder. Without looking at me, he said, "Denny, I think -- I mean -- that is -- kissing and hugging a girl never felt like this! I'm a little confused here, but -- I think -- I know -- I liked that! Are you - oh! Shit, you're still -- please forgive me! I'm so sorry to take advantage of your - "
"Shut up, Brother!" I said, and I kissed his again.
Chapter 8
It was so hard to wake up the next morning. I was facing the wall. Randy was again almost hanging off the other side of the bed. He had my pillow in a strangle hold. I was on what used to be Garth's pillow.
It smelled like him. I again buried my face in it, and breathed deeply. The feeling of that smell went through my whole body. I was not yet quite awake. But I was not so sleepy that I forgot yesterday's call. I felt Randy move next to me. I raised my head from the now wet pillow, and looked his way. His face was turned away still.
"How are you feeling this morning, Denny?" He asked.
"I -- this pillow -- it - " my voice broke.
"It's Garth's isn't it?"
"Yeah. How did you know?"
"Heh! I could smell you in this one!"
"Oh." I said. "I can smell Garth here, too. Incredible!"
"What?"
"How a smell can bring back old feelings. I close my eyes and it's like he's here."
"Denny -- I - " Randy started, then stopped. I waited. "Last night. I -- I didn't mean to -- I mean I'm sorry if - " He stopped again. There was a long embarrassing silence.
"I'm sorry too, Dude." I finally said. "I had no right - "
"NO. It was I who had no right!" Randy said. "I completely took advantage of your grief!"
"Dude, you were dreaming -- a horrendous nightmare. Don't you remember? You thought I was your step-dad!""
"I remember." He answered. "Then it was not him -- it was you. It was you, and I knew I was awake and I knew that -- that - "
"That you were giving some compassion to a good friend!" I finished his sentence. "We can forget it ever happened."
"Yeah. Okay." He agreed.
He got up and headed for the head. I heard the shower going. I buried my face in the pillow once more, trying to -- and succeeding in -- transporting myself to another plane -- at least for a moment. His smell was intoxicating. I heard the shower stop. I scooted over to the edge of the bed. I looked at my pillow, all scrunched up. I looked at the bathroom door, then grabbed it and thrust my face into it. Last night came flooding back.
"Dude!" I looked up and Randy was standing, his towel wrapped around him, staring at me. "What -- what are you doing!"
I put the pillow down, fluffed it a little and said, "Getting up. Hee hee, you sounded like Garth!"
"What?"
"When you said, "Dude!"
"Oh! Yeah!" He said. "Well, I gotta get outa here. Class in ten minutes!" He threw on some clothes, then on the way out the door, "See you after practice!"
I was left alone with my thoughts. I was about to lift up my pillow again when he popped his head back in. "Denny?"
"Yeah?"
"Is that what you want?" He asked. "I mean -- to forget it ever happened?"
I looked up into his eyes. I could not read anything except compassion -- and curiosity. "I -- think -- I -- I don't know. For now, I guess."
"K!" he said and closed the door.
Again I was left with my thoughts. Only now I had one more thing to think about.
Later that afternoon, Randy and Dennie came back to the room together.
"Randy said your other roommate is not coming back. Are you looking for another roommate?"
"Not really, why?" I asked suspiciously.
""Oh, no reason -- except I know a guy who might be interested."
"Well, the dean is aware we have an open bed." (What he wasn't aware of, was that bed had been open for months!) "But as for me," I said, shooting a glance at Randy, "I'd just as soon keep it the two of us for now."
"Okay. I won't say anything. I doubt you'd like him much, anyway. He's gay!"
"You might be surprised," Randy said. "We're not prejudiced." Then that damned guy winked at me! I was almost choking!
"So you would not care of a homo was holed up with you?" She was grinning up at Randy.
"What?" he said, "You think I'm afraid it might rub off?"
"I would HOPE not!" she said, then added quickly, "I mean I kind of like them -- but not if it was you!"
"You would not like me if I was gay?" He said. "Boy! Are you ever bigoted!"
"Why -- ARE you?" she said -- and she punched him in the stomach.
"MMmm?" he said, feeling his own arm. "I may be! Lets see -- well, maybe I could be!"
This wasn't Randy! What was he doing?
Then Dennie turned to me. "And how about you? How do you feel about gays?" I glanced at Randy, who was shaking his head no!
I knew my face was crimson! "I can take them or leave them." I said and immediately looked at the floor.
"Oh!" She said. "Did I hit a nerve? I think you guys are closet bashers!"
"Okay, you win!" Randy said.
"You're no fun at all!" She said. "I was hoping to see you guys make out!"
"Give it up!" Randy said. Girls don't like that anyway -- only guys like that!"
"Seeing two guys kiss?" She teased.
"You know what I'm talking about!"
I was about to crap my pants! Where was this going? "I am going out to get some supper." I said. "Give you two some privacy!"
"AWWwww!" She complained, her bottom lip stuck out. "I thought you were gonna give me a show!"
I paused, then looked at Randy, who had a bemused, expectant look -- and he was DRILLING me! "Make it convincing!" she egged us on!
I walked back to him and wrapped my arms around him and kissed him deep and long. And -- he stood on his tiptoes and kissed me back. I don't think either one of us noticed when our eyes closed.
"Guys? GUYS! You can come up for air now! Okay I give -- I believe you! I didn't believe you'd do it, but now I know you would! And boy, you were very convincing!"
I nearly collapsed. Good thing the bed was close. I wobbly sat on it, my face drained of color.
"I thought you were going out to eat." Dennie said.
"I -- sort of lost my appetite." Well that was not a total lie.
"That's okay, I need to get back anyway. Nice performance! See you tomorrow night?" she asked Randy.
"Uh -- yeah -- tomorrow night."
She walked out and closed the door. Randy and I stared at the door, mouths open for about 30 seconds.
"What just happened?" Randy said.
"What do you think?"
"I think you just kissed me!" He said, almost accusingly.
"Yeah -- and you didn't seem to mind!" I said even more accusingly. "As a matter of fact, if I interpreted it right -- you kissed me back!" Then I added, "And we were both wide awake this time!"
He paused only a moment before throwing himself into my arms with all he had! He started to kiss me, then jerked back. "You -- you're okay with this?"
"I -- I admit -- it's all a little overwhelming. Losing Garth like that hurt so much -- HURTS so much -- but -- this feels -- (sigh!) good!" I shook my head. I felt really confused. "I'm a little mixed up, but if you can put up with that, I would lo -- like you to kiss me again!"
And he did!
"What -- how -- what are you gonna tell Dennie?"
"What? You ARE Denny! Oh! Dennie! This is so confusing!"
"Yeah, I write in my journal every night, and if anyone ever reads this stuff, they will probably be confused, too! So what are you going to say to her?"
"Dude! I don't even know what I'm going to tell ME -- when and if I come to my senses! I promise you one thing -- no, two things!"
"What?"
"Denny, I KNOW that I love you! What kind of love it is I am thoroughly confused about, but - - I promise you, I will give you your space -- to grieve or whatever -- if you want -- but I also promise you that I won't blame you for my feelings for you. No promises -- for now -- okay?"
"So for now," I smirked, "We're just suck buddies?"
"Hey! I said nothing about sucking!" He now was also smirking.
"Suck face, DUDE! -- suck FACE!" I clarified!
Somehow, after that show we put on in the room for Dennie, I guess we did it too well. Or maybe Randy just started being less interested -- or less interest-ING to her. But they drifted apart when the tutoring was no longer needed.
Studying for finals took a lot of energy and time, but during finals week, I had some time to think. And think I did! I had a final on Monday and Tuesday, and a free day Wednesday. Tuesday afternoon, I came home from my test and collapsed on my back, on the bed. I began to think and reminisce. I thought about that night when Randy and I kissed -- so passionately, and yet it didn't happen again. Of course Garth was never far from my mind. I imagined what he looked like. I cried a little, because I didn't even have a picture of him. I had to concentrate to remember what he looked like.
But the feeling of love was still there -- as well as the deep feeling of loss. I turned over and immediately smelled his scent in the pillow. I just could not bring myself to wash the pillow case. I again buried my face into it and breathed deeply. The most melancholy feeling came over me. It started with a shiver and then a sob and before I knew it, I was out of control, sobbing and sniffling.
While I was thus occupied, Randy came in. He immediately closed the door and came over to the bed. I didn't look up. I felt the bed give way as he sat on the edge. I flinched a little when his hand touched my shoulder.
"Garth?" He said. I just nodded my head into the pillow, which was thoroughly wet by now. "Dude!" he said.. "You need to poop or get off the pot!"
Shaken, I jerked my head up and looked at him through tear-blurred eyes. I wanted, no needed tenderness, and he was yelling at me -- or so it seemed. When our eyes met, his voice softened. "Denny, I feel terrible -- and so powerless to help you out. I love you like you are my own brother -- you know that. I think you need to find someone else. I know I said I would give you your space, but - " I lay back down, and that seemed to give him reason to rub my shoulders. He resumed talking. "Why don't you just go back to Kansas and confront him? You said your parents would help you out -- right?"
"Yeah, but - "
"But - - ?"
"He has refused my calls. He won't answer my emails. What can I do?"
"This is not for him, Dude. It's for you. When you get there, maybe when he sees you -- in person, he will melt. Maybe that's all it will take. Or -- maybe he will tell you to get out of his life." Either way, you will know, and maybe get some kind of closure -- some peace."
After a huge sigh, I answered. "Would you go with me?"
"I can't afford - "
"Hey -- friends fly free! It's worth a try!"
Well that was settled. I decided whether or not Randy could come, I was going. I called immediately and there was no friends fly free, but I could take him for half price. I phoned my parents and they easily agreed that that would be the best and safest.
As we boarded the plane, Randy got all hyper and giggly. He had never flown! At the last minute, I was lucky to get two tickets and the 1/2 price fare. But we didn't get to sit together. I gave him his choice. He sat closer to the rear and I was near the middle, next to the emergency exit. There was an overweight woman on each side of me! Well, I guess I could be thankful they didn't smell bad! I had to ask one of them to move so I could extricate my seat belt from under her. But she was very pleasant.
Four flight attendants -- three female -- one male -- were on this flight. It went smooth enough. When we got off the plane, I walked by the guy flight attendant who was saying goodbye to everyone. "Thank you for flying with us!" He smiled big and winked at me. DAMN! Had he guessed?
We rented a car and then bought a map. We ate lunch at a McDonalds while we studied the map. Garth was about 50 miles from Kansas City MO, in Ottawa, Kansas. We drove there in a little under an hour and the first motel we saw had the vacancy sign lit. We stopped there. We swam and then came back to the room and rested awhile. All we could get was a double bed. It felt good to have him so near again. I was drowned in my own thoughts when his finger touched my arm. I jumped. The hair on both arms came to attention.
"Sorry, dude. What's your plan now?"
"Well -- I think that we need to go out and get a map or some directions. Then after a bite to eat, drive to his house."
"Maybe we ought to go before dinner -- give him a chance to ask us in for dinner?"
"N- no, I don't want to do that. Let's eat first."
"You're the boss!"
We found a Red Lobster to eat at. I treated. It was really nice for Randy, because he just did not get a chance to do nice things like go to nice restaurants. It seemed to me that EVERYONE was scoping us out. And I don't mean just for curiosity! Guys and girls both seemed to be drilling us. Did they think we were a couple. Were they flirting with us?
I stalled for as long as I could at the restaurant until Randy called me on it. I paid the bill and we headed for Garth's house.
Knock knock knock! A man came to the door. "Is Garth here?"
"No. Garth doesn't live here -- any more." My heart sunk. "Would you like to call him? He lives just across town. Are you friends of his?"
"Yes we -- uh -- we are from UCLA. We were Garth's room mates."
"OH! He will be so happy to see you. Let me call him." He walked away from the door, then turned back around. "Won't you come in. He reached for the phone.
"Uh -- Mr. Roth? Wait!" He turned around. "Do you think he's home? We kind of wanted to surprise him."
"Oh -- of course! I just talked to him. He's home all right. Getting ready for school on Monday. He came home to -- well you know that story. I'll just write some directions down for you."
He wrote then explained to us how to get to Garth's apartment. We drove over there, having no problem finding it. I checked myself out as best I could in the rear view mirror. "You look great, Denny!"
"Thanks!" I replied, and we walked in and found his apartment.
Knock knock knock!
No answer, but there was some scuffling about inside.
Knock knock knock!
The door opened. There was my hunk, standing partially dressed, hair mussed up. He stood there as if he did not comprehend.
"Oh my god!" He said. It wasn't a pleased or excited statement. Just surprised. He looked back and hissed, "GET DRESSED!" When he did that, the door opened slightly more -- just enough to see a girl in approximately the same state of attire he was.
"Look, We can come back!" I speedily said.
"NO! Come in -- come in." He opened the door and beckoned us in. "This is Nancy. Nancy, this is my -- er -- these are my ex-roommates from UCLA."
"Charmed" she said, lacking interest. "Look, Garth, I guess it's time for me to go, huh? You'd probably like to talk with your friends."
He looked at me then back to her. I -- uh -- I guess -- yeah, sure."
She didn't bother getting fully dressed -- only grabbed everything in her arms and stalked past us, and out the door.
"Wow!" Randy said.
"She'll get over it!" Garth said. "What's -- well, I know no one comes to Ottawa, Kansas as a tourist! What brings you here?"
I did not say anything at first. I didn't know how to answer. Finally, Randy said, "You."
"What?" Garth asked.
"I -- uh -- wanted to bring you something." Garth looked totally perplexed. "Just a moment!" I said, and ran back out to the car. I grabbed the pillow and came back in. I handed it to him.
"What the hell - - ?"
"It's your pillow!" I said, lamely. He looked at me like I was insane -- I felt like I WAS! "It -- it -- I -- could not -- stand the smell any longer."
"The smell!?? What?" he shook his head as if to shake something off. "The smell!" He put it up to his face and inhaled. His face blanched. "O my god!" He said again. His eyes filled. "You -- you've been -- sleeping with this, huh?" He said almost too quietly to be heard. "Wow." He shook his head slower this time.
I took one step closer to him. He gathered me up in his arms, burying his face in my neck. Mine was in his too. I was almost immediately intoxicated by his strong scent. I guess he must have also smelled me in the pillow. He held me and seemed to be trying to breathe in my essence. Let me tell you, I was doing the same! I felt his tears soak into my shirts. Finally he said, "Denny -- I -- I mean -- you have no idea how I've missed you!"
"I think maybe I do!" I croaked out. "I love you, as much or more than before you left." I risked.
He pulled his head back and so I did too, to look deeply into his eyes. It seemed an eternity that we stood there, nose to nose. Finally he said. "Denny, not a night goes by that I have not thought of you. I have cried myself to sleep -- oh -- so many times." I started to speak, but he put his hand over my mouth. "I don't know how to begin to tell you this. I just -- I just - " his eyes filled up anew. "I can't do it! I just can't. You need to -- to -- go. I have to thank you for -- for -- teaching me what love feels like. I feel like I am going to explode, from the mixed feelings inside me right now. But -- I cannot -- cannot -- you just have to go. Please -- and - " his voice cracked and he cleared his throat. "No, never mind. I just -- I can't deal -- I'm so -- I'm sorry, Denny -- so sorry. Please go."
I was -- well to say devastated would be an understatement. I walked out the door. I looked up at Randy on my way out, his jaw about as far dropped as it could go, I think.
I stood for a moment, watching Randy stare unbelievably at Garth. I stuck my head back in the door and pulled on Randy's arm. He shook it off, then looked again toward Garth and said, "You -- you're," a big sigh, "Incredible". Then he walked out the door, shaking his head.
We walked to the car. I handed him the keys. "If you want to get back to the motel in one piece." I said. We drove in silence. When we parked in front of our room, Randy got out, locked his door and then came over to my side and opened my door. When it was clear I was not moving, he took my hand and pulled me up and out. He pulled me to the door. He unlocked and opened the door, then pushed me in. I walked as far as the bed. I collapsed, face up, on the bed, and closed my eyes.
"Aren't you gong to undress?" Randy asked me. I just turned over and lay face down in the middle of the bed. I heard him padding around, opening and closing his suitcase. I felt the bed as he climbed in. He lay his arm over my back and he whispered in my ear, "Do you want me to help you out of your clothes?" I nodded without looking at him. He took off my shoes and socks, then pulled my shirts over my head, then was able to lift me enough to unto my belt and fly and pulled my pants off. My boxers came half off with my pants. He hiked them back up, and patted my butt.
Then he climbed half on top of me. He stayed there until I was asleep. The last thing I remember was his voice -- as of coming through a tube, as I heard him say, "I love you, Denny."
As usual, I awoke first. I was on my back, my rock-hard woody jutting almost straight up out of my boxers. I looked over toward Randy. As usual, he was clinging to the edge of the bed. I got up and padded to the bathroom. As I disappeared through the door, I don't think he saw me catching him staring at my proud staff.
I relieved both my bladder and my colon. When I came back out, his eyes were closed, but he could not hide the fact that he was breathing hard and fast. I quietly leaned down next to him and quietly said, "So -- did you finish, or did I interrupt you?"
He swallowed hard then coughed, and said, "What?"
I laughed and said, "You heard me! I saw you peeking at me as I went into the bathroom!"
"Hah! You don't have to peek to see a flag waving so proudly!"
"And that's what prompted your outburst of patriotism?"
"Hee hee! Well, - yeah!" He looked too cute when he was embarrassed!
"And -- did the skyrockets go off?"
"Boy, you're full of it this morning aren't you?"
"You're evading the question."
"Nope -- it's the answer I'm evading!"
"Okay! I was just curious, that's all." I went around to the other side and climbed back in. I started to close my eyes.
"High and mighty."
"What?" I said.
"The skyrockets -- high and mighty."
"Oh really?" I quipped. "That must have been messy!"
"Messy? Why messy?"
"Duh! Unless you have a towel or something in there I didn't see."
He looked at me as if I was crazy. "WHAT are you TALKING about?"
"What happened to you -- your -- jizzzum?"
"Oh! Well -- er -- what do you do with yours?"
"Depends. If I am not too lazy, I get some tissue or a towel or a dirty pair of shorts."
"Really?" He looked incredulous! "Do most guys do that?"
"I -- heeheea! I don't know! I never did much with other guys -- at least after we started to spurt!"
"Well neither did I. I just assumed everyone - - "
"Everyone what?"
"Well, now I'm embarrassed!" He stopped, then started. "I -- um -- I eat it!"
I almost choked on that! "What??!!" Now he looked extremely ashamed. "Dude! I'm sorry! I just -- I don't know if other guys do that or not! I just -- how did you start doing that? How does it taste?"
"Well -- this may gross you out -- but I have to tell you -- it tasted a lot better than my step-dads!"
"OH! Oh shit! I didn't -- I'm sorry -- I -- but I thought -- I thought - " He waited for me to continue." I thought you said he raped you!"
"DUDE! Any kind of forced sex is rape! But if you're talking about fucking me -- he did that too! But he often made me finish him off with my mouth!"
"That -- that - " I felt as if I was going to puke right there! "So you were forced to -- I can't even say it!"
"Yeah. That bastard stuck it in my ass and when he was close would take it out and make me take it in my mouth."
"Didn't you puke?"
"I did a few times, but then he would beat me! Then make me clean up the mess. I learned to - - take it."
"Oh, Randy -- I'm so sorry -- SO sorry! I didn't mean to bring all that up!"
"It's -- you know it's funny -- but -- it's strangely liberating to tell it. I wrote it down and even told Ray. But telling you -- it helps me to know I am doing the right thing pressing charges against him."
"Still," I said, remorsefully, "I am sorry to make you almost -- well to relive that hell!"
"Like I said -- it's okay. And by the way -- I was afraid when I first started to cum for real. I was afraid he would beat me if he ever found any trace of it. So that's when I started to eat it. And believe me -- it tastes like honey by comparison!"
"Well, you're not home now -- so you don't have to any more!"
"Believe it or not -- I like it now."
I was repulsed at the thought, but at the same time, intrigued and -- something else. I noticed he was unconsciously stroking it again. "Randy?"
"Yeah?"
"I -- um -- I don't know how to ask -- but -- um -- I guess just ask. Randy -- can I -- um can I suck you?"
"Dude! I don't -- I mean -- I'd feel -- bad -- or something. I've never done that -- and - I just couldn't do it back for you!"
"I -- well -- that's okay. Just like when we kissed. No promises. Dude I really want this."
He looked deep into my eyes as he slowly uncovered himself. I got my self in a position between his legs. I then just went for it, sucking and munching. "Dude -- watch the teeth! And -- um -- I think -- your supposed to -- um kind of stroke it with your mouth."
So I stopped sucking so much and carefully covered my teeth with my lips and started slowly stroking him. The more I did it, the more I got into it. I could feel his breathing get faster and faster, and he started to moan. I was pumping myself into the sheets as I did him! I heard him cry out and then he grabbed my head and jammed all his 5" in my throat, and he started to do the pumping! Shot after shot of his spunk went into my mouth. I tried to hold it all there -- determined not to swallow it, but it became too much, so I just went for it, and started to swallow as fast as I could. Then I started to cum in the most spectacular orgasm I ever felt!
When we were finished, I lay my head in his lap, his softening piece compressed by my ear. His hands were still on my head and he was massaging my hair and scalp. I was kneading his wonderful baseballer's butt! I forgot all about Garth -- at least momentarily.
We fell back asleep in that position for about an hour. When I woke up, he was pulling me up further on top of him, then turned us both over so he was lying on top of me. He was still soft, but I was rock solid again. He hugged me and said, "Denny -- I'm sorry."
"Don't be." I said. "Remember -- no promises." I think I said it convincingly.
Notes: If you think you know where this is going -- you know more than I do! I am in total free fall! I have some ideas, but the story often twists in ways that totally surprise even me. Comment if you like to Steve, at s4d@hotmail.com. And thanks to all of those who have already written. I love you all! Steve